Beautiful Disaster
by Setkia
Summary: Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.
1. The Waiter With The Curly Brow

_**Author's Note** : Hello everyone and welcome to my first ever **One Piece** story! Now I know that writing this is rather stupid, considering I've seen so little of the show, but for the past few weeks, all I've been doing is reading stories about Zoro and Sanji and I have to agree, I love them together! This is my first AU story for anime I've ever written and it's very different from what I usually write in various different ways. First of all, there are a lot more warnings, on top of the fact that this is a rating I've never had to use before. There will be various warnings, which will be stated ahead of time before the chapter starts as fair warning for anyone, but I've never written something like this before so it's my first time writing these kinds of themes, so pardon me, I'm learning. I brought the story to Japan, made the Baratie a restaurant that didn't float on water and made all the cooks and waiters rather different. This was inspired by the Baratie arc, (obviously) because most people just write the Baratie as part of Sanji's life, they never really look into it all that much and focus on him being a cook rather than him being a cook who works at the Baratie. Please review if you like it so I know to continue! No flames, sorry if facts aren't perfect and unlike most of my stories, the characters will be pretty OOC, to fit the story. I did some research for this chapter alone so that I could get the right kind of dishes and such, please look them up if you want cause I can't figure out a way to describe them. I use yen, the Japanese currency, when Zoro talks about prices. I've basically figured out that 100 yen is about 1 dollar, and while maybe you might think these prices are low, to me they're incredibly high. Also, I know close to nothing about restaurants, so once again, sorry if my information isn't correct. I don't own **One Piece.**_

 _Slightly edited note (because I haven't corrected anything yet): I have changed this story's name because the other name was too long and I like this title better cause I think it fits Sanji perfectly._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
_ _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 1: The Waiter With The Curly Brow

* * *

A friend of his, Johnny, had recommended the joint. Said it served the best food he had ever tasted, even if they were a bit pricey. It was worth it to eat their legendary soup that had made itself known throughout all of Japan.

Seeing as he was almost always short on money, the green-haired man had decided that once his wallet was full of yen, he wouldn't bother wasting it on some stupid meal at some fancy-smancy restaurant, yet he found himself speaking to a blond man behind a counter, conversing over the topic of his reservation.

"Zoro Roronoa," Zoro said.

The blond looked up at him and Zoro took in the man. A blue eye was visible underneath one of the curliest eyebrows Zoro had ever seen, while the other eye was hidden underneath a curtain of golden hair. In the corner of the man's mouth was a cigarette, which rested lazily in between his lips and as he inhaled it, you'd think it were the loveliest rose in the world.

The man, whose name-tag read _"Sanji",_ raised his curly eyebrow. "Roronoa," he repeated, his voice low and deep. He looked back up at him and smiled, obviously faking it. He couldn't be older than Zoro's age. Sanji took a menu from beneath the table and with his free hand, took his cigarette out. He threw it into the waste bin beside the counter and flashed him another fake smile. "Please follow me."

Zoro didn't like the man's attitude, but he followed him anyway and took a seat in the far back of the restaurant where there was a _"No Smoking"_ sign. So that's why the man had gotten rid of his. He seemed like a chain-smoker so of course there was a good reason why he had put his out. It wasn't because he might have realized Zoro disliked the smell of nicotine.

Zoro waited anxiously for the man to leave, the smell of his cigarettes sticking to the blond's black suit and making him cringe, but instead, the man did not move. In fact, he stayed put. "My name is Sanji, sir, is there anything I can get you to drink?"

Zoro's eyes widened. _No fucking way._ "E-excuse me?"

"May I get you anything to drink?" repeated the waiter. "We have a large assortment of alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages, all relatively reasonably priced."

Zoro gaped. "B-but—"

"Yes?"

"You're … you're that guy who's behind the counter, aren't you? Doesn't that mean you're not a waiter? How can you have two jobs at once?"

The man frowned. "We're a little short on staff," said Sanji. "Everyone works on a rotation schedule and to be dreadfully honest sir, I'm not a waiter and would wish if you did not call me such. I'm a cook, a chef to be more precise. I'm merely filling in for certain roles which are currently vacant. However, I do believe the job which you so eloquently described as 'that guy behind the counter' would be the receptionist, Mr. Roronoa."

Zoro nodded numbly. Great, stuck with this guy for a whole night? No matter, he'd just order his food, eat quickly and leave. The Lord knew he was better at inhaling food rather than eating it and savouring flavours. He was a busy man with a tight schedule; he couldn't put his whole day on hold for a few leisurely minutes to eat.

The waiter— _cook_ , gave him a nod. "Now, about that drink?"

Zoro opened his menu to look at the various options of beverages.

 _Let's see, cocktails are 18 00 yen, red or white wine is 20 00 yen per bottle, a martini is 15 00 yen, a— holy crap, there's no way a glass of vodka can possibly be 30 00 yen! Reasonable prices my ass!_

"I'll just have water," Zoro said, sending the fake cook a fake smile. It was good that he didn't have any alcohol anyway, he had a tournament tomorrow, it wouldn't do well to wake up with a hangover.

Sanji nodded. "Please, feel free to browse the menu and let me know when you've made your decision."

Zoro nodded and stared back down at the menu.

Fuck, this place was expensive!

Zoro could already tell his wallet would be drained in a matter of minutes and that was if he only had an appetizer with no main course. How could people afford this stuff? The food couldn't be good enough to even _consider_ putting such prices on the meals. He watched as other waiters walked around the room and settled on a simple sashimi and cucumber and avocado sushi for his appetizer. It seemed as though his wallet would be about 120 00 yen lighter, but he would survive. Somehow.

He called Sanji over and ordered his meal, waiting with his water with fresh ice in it, for it to come. He wasn't sure why, but the water tasted fantastic, which was strange since water had never really had much of a taste to begin with in Zoro's opinion, but maybe it was the fancy setting the restaurant had that made him think that this water was more spectacular than any other. The ice couldn't have magical properties, could it?

Zoro raised the glass to his eye, as though by doing this, he could better understand its secrets. He watched the ice swirl around inside and heard a woman chuckle to his left. Immediately, his head snapped around but the woman looked away, instead speaking to her friend, whispering in her ear. Probably about him from the way the girl was giggling as well.

It wasn't his fault he had never been to such a high-class place. Just because he might be famous in the martial arts and kenjutsu circles didn't mean that he made all that much money. Kendo fights only gave him so much money and just because he was also a free-lance fighter in other sectors of Japan didn't mean he received any money for that, it was more of a hobby anyway. Zoro wouldn't apologize if his etiquette didn't match that of others.

The cook brought over his food as he pondered the best way to explain himself— a uncouth, dirty swordsman in such an elegant place as the Baratie— to the woman, before he decided it didn't matter once the smell of his appetizer met his nose.

It was heavenly. Just the smell of it was enough to make his mouth water. The cook seemed rather pleased, watching the way Zoro practically salivated over the dish before he finally got his chopsticks in his hand and dug in.

Zoro didn't usually savour the flavour of anything, but it was truly exquisite and he found it would be downright rude not to enjoy the taste. It melted on his tongue, tantalizing his tastebuds and left him wanting more. It took perhaps a minute and a half before all of the sushi was gone.

He frowned at his now empty plate. He probably could've eaten slower.

Sanji let out a laugh and Zoro realized, to his surprise, that he hadn't moved during the entire time (as short as it was) that he had been eating. Come to think of it, when his eyes had roamed around the restaurant while he was waiting, not once did he ever see the blond disappear through the swinging doors to the kitchen except to place the order and to retrieve it. If Zoro had actually bothered to calculate it, in total, Sanji had probably spent a total of a minute inside the kitchen— strange for someone who called himself a cook.

"What are you looking at?" Zoro hissed at him, taking a deep gulp of water.

"You're enjoying your meal I see?"

What kind of a question was that? And was it even a question? The way Sanji said it was as though he expected an answer to a question, but the certainty in his statement could not be denied. It was as though he wanted Zoro to boost his ego or something. Zoro's eyes narrowed and the man laughed again. It was short and abrupt, and it wasn't until the cook took his plate that Zoro realized it was fake.

Horribly and completely hollow of emotion, thinking about that laugh sent shivers down Zoro's spine. There was something up about this cook. It wasn't his place to say anything though, considering he didn't even know the man so instead of asking, he busied himself with thinking about his main dish.

He licked his lips. Knowing that the appetizer was this good had to mean that the main course would be just as good, if not better. His eyes continued to scan the restaurant, his fingers tapping an unidentifiable rhythm on the tablecloth as he kept his eye on his waiter, purposefully this time. There was just something strange about him. He attracted your eye with his blond hair, the only blond in the room, and his posit and stance and just about everything about him. Like he was acting too hard to be normal so he stuck out and yet he didn't at the same time.

He watched as Sanji leaned over a table to speak to a nice woman with pretty blonde hair. He had a cigarette in his mouth once more and it seemed as though that was where it was meant to be. He was obviously flirting with the girl, who blushed and swatted his hand away playfully. He whispered something in her ear and Zoro chuckled.

The Baratie may be high-class, but the waiters didn't seem all that put together.

The way Sanji moved though —watching the cook as he walked across the restaurant, flirting, taking orders and speaking with the clients— it was so fluid and natural, Zoro had to say he had just imagined the strangeness of the man, but right when he was about to stop his observation (it was beginning to seem creepy, if he could be honest with himself), he saw Sanji accidentally bump into another waiter.

The waiter dropped his tray by accident and Sanji caught it quickly, giving it back to him, but the look on the other waiter's face was nowhere near grateful. In fact, he scowled and Sanji took a step back, as though bitten.

The route that Sanji took across the restaurant, Zoro realized, watching the blond move, was not fluid and natural in the very least. The way he seemed to glide was because he was on the tips of his toes, ready to move anywhere at the last instant and whenever he found himself in a corner of the room, the curly browed cook would look at the room calculatingly before he took his steps, always moving in a certain route. A route that, Zoro realized, avoided all other waiters in the room.

It was subtle, almost unnoticeable, the way that Sanji seemed to ignore them, as though they weren't there. He didn't make it obvious and Zoro supposed it wasn't supposed to be obvious. He did it so naturally, so instinctively, you wouldn't think it was unusual unless you saw the way his jaw clenched onto the cigarette in his mouth tighter when he was dangerously close to brushing by another waiter.

Certain his hungry stomach was making him see things, Zoro was more than delighted when his main course arrived.

Using his chopsticks, he took a piece of the sashimi and instantly, his eyes closed and his head tossed itself back. He let out a delighted moan that was just a little too loud and the entire room turned towards him. He opened his eyes and glared at them all before taking another bite out of the orgasmic meal.

If the appetizer was heaven then the meal was paradise. It made him want to roll his eyes into the back of his head and just slip into a coma of the sensations it gave him, filling his stomach fully and wonderfully.

"Satisfied?" asked Sanji with a smirk.

The cigarette was gone once more, but the smoke was still in his breath, the smallest trace of the toxic substance visible when he spoke. Zoro considered moving to a different table, one which allowed smoking, for the cook's sake, but thought better of it. He was almost done anyway, there was no reason to move just so that man could rot his teeth and give himself lung cancer.

Zoro finished his food and was well and full when Sanji handed him another menu. "What would you like for dessert, Mr. Roronoa?" he asked.

Dessert? Zoro hadn't even thought of dessert. Imagawayaki sounded remarkably good right now and despite the fact that his stomach was busting, Zoro nodded and asked for an order of it.

It was only after the menu was gone and the order was placed that Zoro realized how many zeroes had been next to the dessert's price. He was going to go bankrupt here, with all the amazing food. He hated to admit it but Johnny had been right. Regardless of that, Zoro wouldn't be able to pay his rent, never mind the bill at this rate.

He watched Sanji as he lit another cigarette and took a long inhale before letting it out. The cook's hands looked delicate, which was strange considering Zoro knew cooks used knives and rough materials —not to mention they kneaded dough— so how was it that Sanji's hands looked so smooth?

When his dessert was brought to him, he ate it without question and once again, nearly melted from the taste. He almost let out another moan, but he held it in, Sanji smirking all the while, probably knowing that Zoro was loving his meal.

Once he was done, the check came. This was the part that Zoro had been dreading. Pulling out his wallet, he searched through his money. His tally was 147 75 yen. Boy was he glad he hadn't asked for any fancy wine.

He paid his amount and was about to stand when he thought about it.

He had been paying an unnatural amount of attention towards his waiter and the service had been good, not to mention the food (Zoro was sure if he thought about the food long enough, he might end up moaning again, so he resisted the urge), and so, perhaps he could spare a few more minutes and speak to the head chef, give his proper compliments towards him and all, when he looked up and realized the waiter was gone.

He looked both left and right, scanning the entire room, but found no blond with a curly brow to be seen. Which meant either he had gone home, or perhaps he was in the kitchen.

Zoro pushed out his chair and got his jacket, which he had insisted stay on the back of his chair throughout the night, and looked for the doors to the kitchen. Maybe he could just pop in quickly, give the man his compliments to the chef and then he'd get the sleep he needed before his competition tomorrow.

Zoro stopped in front of the kitchen doors, about to open them, when he heard a loud sound.

In general, Zoro figured that kitchens were noisy, with cooks and chefs and waiters running in and out, plus the sound of the pots and pans— the making of food was no silent task, after all— but this loud sound had not been pots or pans, though Zoro wished it had been. No, this loud sound was a scream. One of a pain.

He looked behind him at the restaurant to see if anyone else had heard it or if it was only him. Perhaps it was just loud because he was so close to the door? Against his better judgement, Zoro listened, wondering what was happening.

"You think I can serve this shit?" someone demanded loudly.

There was a wince and Zoro looked through the small window of the doors to see the inside. It was messy and now that he thought about it, there wasn't really a shortage of staff from the amount of waiters outside and the amount of cooks inside the kitchen. There was steam from the pots and beeping from the ovens, telling others that certain meals were done but he searched for the one who had spoken and saw it was a large man in a hairnet, waving around a ladle as though it were a weapon.

"There's nothing wrong with my soup!"

Zoro knew that voice. Though he had only heard it for the first time today, there was no denying it was Sanji. Looking around the kitchen though, he couldn't see him. He concluded he had to be behind the unnaturally huge man.

"Oh yeah?" demanded the other man who was towering over Sanji. "Are you trying to poison our customers? This shit's horrible—"

Hadn't Sanji said he was a chef? He had sounded so proud of himself when he said it too. What kind of chef took pride in his meals if they were shit? Was one of them lying?

CRASH!

A bowl of soup fell to the floor and shattered, the liquid pooling at the man's feet. "I can't believe the head cook lets you cook here! And why were you out there serving? You're a cook, as shitty as you are, you aren't supposed to be out with the waiters!"

"I'm a shitty cook?" Sanji repeated. " _I'm_ the shitty cook? I'm surprised people can manage to swallow the load of crap you feed them!"

 _SMACK!_

Sanji fell to the floor, staggering back. He came into Zoro's line of vision and he couldn't deny the cigarette he saw in Sanji's mouth. "What the fuck was that for?" demanded Sanji.

"The old man isn't here, which means you're no different from us," the big man said. "Which is why you should know your fucking place!" He struck Sanji with the ladle harshly in the gut and Zoro watched the pain as it registered across Sanji's face. Zoro felt a sudden pain in his gut as well.

"And that sashimi you made?" The man spat on the ground, onto the soup. "The only reason we served it was because we didn't have time to fix your fuck up!"

Wait, _Sanji_ had made that heavenly sashimi? What the fuck was this man talking about then? If Sanji had made that food, then he was clearly an exceptional cook! Why was this man sprouting lies to him?

"Now get the fucking dishes done, you're not leaving this room till closing time, right Carne?" the big man asked, turning to grin at someone who was out of Zoro's line of vision.

The man moved away, kicking the broken pieces of the bowl at Sanji, before he rolled up his sleeves and went to cooking.

Sanji bit his lip and pulled his knee up to himself, taking a long drag out of his cigarette. He picked up the broken pieces of the bowl while the rest of the kitchen continued as though this were nothing new. Was this … normal?

When Sanji threw the shattered remains of the bowl into the garbage, he looked up and his blue eyes locked on Zoro.

Sanji looked as though he had been caught committing a heinous crime, freezing, the colour draining from his already pale face. Was this the secret of the curly brow waiter? Was this why he avoided the other waiters?

Zoro couldn't think straight and instead, bolted from the scene and got into his car, wondering what he had just bared witness to.

Though he didn't know the cook at all, Zoro found himself hoping he was okay and vowing to come back the next night, regardless of whether or not he was broke. But no, that was a lie. It was happening. He had seen it all before and he was about to see it again, but hopefully, this time there would be a different ending.

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 2nd 2015**

 **2nd Edit: November 29th 2015**


	2. That Marimo Bastard

_**Author's Note** : So hello again. For those of you who may have already read any of my stories (you never know), thank-yous to everyone who reviewed will be found at the end of the chapter in a second author's note where I might comment on what you said, or just say thank-you (my mother would be so proud, I've got manners, FINALLY!). I decided to update a bit sooner than I expected because when I got the point of my story being up for about 8 hours, I had as many followers and now I have 13 follows, 4 favourites and 3 reviews. I was REALLY happy to get any reviews for this since I wasn't sure how people would react to it and all, but I'm really glad people like it! An explanation in terms of why this chapter is written a bit differently from the last one: I have a writing style which I describe as the following: 3rd person version of 1st person. Basically, it's told in the 3rd person (he said, she watched, they saw), but it follows only one character the same way 1st person does so that all thoughts that occur are all through the perspective of the chosen character for that chapter, or section of the chapter. Zoro and Sanji will be working on a rotation, odd numbered chapters are Zoro's to control and even numbered chapters are Sanji's. In translation, this chapter is told by Sanji so none of Zoro's thoughts are present. I had to make some adjustments to the Baratie to help the story and a few other things, but I tried to keep it as similar as it is in the anime/manga. The only named staff of the Baratie are Carne and Patty, so I have a request for those who read long author notes. Please come up with other staff members of the Baratie for me. Give me their names, their age, their appearance and how they act. Unfortunately, they all have to be cruel to Sanji, however you can make them one of the less harsh ones, or maybe one of those people who just follow what others are doing. Either way, the Baratie needs staff! I do not own **One Piece,** welcome to the next chapter of **Beautiful Disaster**!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 2: That Marimo Bastard

* * *

The bastard was there again.

He didn't know why, but for some reason, that annoying moss-headed idiot was sitting at a seat in the corner of the room, this time in a smoking-permitting zone.

Sanji knew that pretending to be a waiter had been worth the abuse. True, he was more bruised than he probably would have been if he had just stayed inside the kitchen, but socializing with the customers was something he hadn't done in so long. The look on their faces when they ate their food, especially when it was food Sanji had prepared, was priceless. He liked to know that his hard work payed off, at least for one of them.

The waiters had ignored him unless they were forced to acknowledge his presence and the others in the kitchen had given him scowls, but took the orders he had submitted and allowed him to return to serve them to the customers. It had worked once, maybe it could work again?

Sanji didn't care about the consequences, he was beyond caring at this point. He just wanted to see the restaurant he and Zeff had made, being run the way it was meant to be. When he was out there with the clients, it certainly felt that way and he'd take whatever punishment they deemed necessary to see the beautiful, tame Baratie that the customers were under the illusion it was.

With gritted teeth, he took a long drag from his cigarette before approaching the moss-haired idiot, a notepad clutched in his hand, a menu in his other.

 _He doesn't know that much,_ he reasoned as he took each step, though he couldn't seem to convince himself, no matter how much he wanted to. _You don't know how long he was there, he could've seen nothing. Or he could have seen everything._

"Hello and welcome to the Baratie," he greeted him. If he remembered him from the night before correctly, then that man's wallet had been nearly empty. How was he here again? It didn't make sense, but he decided not to question it and instead put on a warm smile. They said it took less muscles to smile than to frown. Sanji thought — no, he _knew_ they were fucking liars. "Is there anything I can get you to drink to start you off?"

What was his name again? It was a strange one, there was a book about it somewhere, wasn't there? Some Spanish person, maybe? It started with a Z, right? Zephyr? Zander? Zack? No, he wasn't even close, was he?

Sanji glanced up for a moment, staring at one of the many TVs that were spread across the Baratie in case someone happened to want to hear the news. He found it was a pointless thing to spend the budget on, especially since the TVs clashed horribly with the colour scheme and nearly completely shattered the sophisticated atmosphere the restaurant had. There was a blonde woman on the TV at the moment, speaking into that stupid looking mic, something about an athlete. The heading read:

 _Zoro Roronoa takes first place prize in national Kendo competition!_

That was it! Zoro! That was his name! _Thank you TV— wait._

"You're Zoro Roronoa, the Kendo champion?"

Zoro looked up at him, confused. He raised an eyebrow and nodded slowly. "Yeah? So?"

Oh, this was great, wasn't it? Just fucking fantastic. Not only was he seen at his lowest point by a mere customer, that mere customer had to be Zoro Roronoa, the famous Kendo star. When he thought about it, considering the money he was certain Zoro got from winning his matches (and receiving the gold, as often as he did), Sanji was surprised he hadn't seen Zoro at the restaurant any time before. Maybe he had come and Sanji had just been stuck in the kitchen. It didn't matter now anyway.

Sanji wanted to hit himself. Of course Sanji should have known who Zoro was and to make matters worse, his name was written on his reservation and yet Sanji had never put two and two together and gotten four, he had gotten five and if he had known and been just a bit better at math, then he probably wouldn't have been in this stupid predicament. Then again, Sanji had the rottenness luck so he couldn't be sure.

"I'll have water."

"Pardon?" Sanji asked, pulled out of his thoughts.

"My drink," Zoro said. "I'll have water." Zoro seemed to think for a moment before adding, "you wouldn't happen to have magic ice cubes, would you?"

Magic ice cubes?

What was Sanji worrying about? If this guy believed in magic ice cubes, he was clearly a blockhead and probably had tried to put two and two together and ended up with twenty-eight. There was no way an idiot this big could possibly think anything more of what he may or may not have seen.

Now Sanji was just deluding himself. There had been screaming, there had been a _SMACK_ and then Sanji had been on the floor. It didn't take a genius to figure it out. Still, Sanji hoped the marimo had an IQ of 0, or maybe even negative numbers.

"Of course, right away sir," said Sanji, pushing his thoughts away and flashing him a fake smile.

"What? No Mr. Roronoa today?" asked Zoro. "Or is that just a one-time special?" he teased.

Sanji bit his lip to stop himself from saying anything and instead, told him that he'd be back soon with his water.

Sanji knew that the earlier in the night he entered the kitchen, the better it would be since the longer the night wore on, the more the chefs stole from the champagne cabinet and the less sober they'd be. It was currently eight thirty, which meant that for the next hour or so he'd be safe to enter the kitchen with little more than a slap.

Still though, he didn't want to go in the kitchen at a time when it wasn't necessary. Spotting a tray on an unoccupied table, Sanji took the pitcher from it and returned to Zoro, pouring it into his glass. The swordsman gave him a smile, one that, after some time of thinking, Sanji realized was genuine. How long had it been since he had seen someone smile for a reason other than eating food with such sincerity? Better question: when was the last time someone smiled at _him_ , Sanji?

Unsure of what to do in response, he looked around the restaurant at the others enjoying their meals. From the look on the customers faces, they liked his famous soup, not that anyone had to know it was his. After all, what was an assistant chef who took credit for his own work? No, Patty could take all the credit he wanted. Sanji couldn't wait for the day when the media finally asked him how he made it and Patty gave them that blank stare.

There was a tugging at his cuff and he looked down at Zoro.

He hadn't put much notice into it, but now he realized that unlike last night, Zoro was dressed more casually. The green-haired man had been wearing a dress shirt (horribly ironed) and nice slacks to the restaurant last night, along with a reasonably presentable jacket, but tonight he wore a plain black shirt and a pair of jeans with sneakers. The Baratie didn't have a dress code, but it was almost like an unspoken rule that one had to be dressed proper. At least, according to the other chefs it was. As long as they were hungry, Sanji was willing to fed them. So was Zeff, he knew, but the other cooks didn't see things the way he did. Of course they wouldn't, they didn't know the pain of hunger the way he did.

"Yes?" he asked the man.

"I'd like to order now, cook."

Sanji's eyes widened in shock. The rare times he managed to get out of the kitchen and serve, he always had to state that he was not a waiter and yet this man had remembered. No one had remembered before.

Sanji shook off his surprise and nodded. "What will it be, Mr. Roronoa?"

"I think I'll have the tempura for my main dish."

"And for your appetizer?"

Zoro smirked. "The soup."

Sanji didn't have to ask which one.

He nodded and went to the kitchen, entering with caution. He looked both left and right, making sure Patty was no where to be seen. Carne was harsh, but he wasn't as harsh as Patty. He approached one of the less aggressive cooks (they were all aggressive in the end though) and placed the order before leaving the kitchen quickly and swiftly.

Taking a deep breath, he looked around the restaurant and found that people watching was becoming a habit of his. Cabin fever, or rather, kitchen fever, did that to him. He would stare at the others around the restaurant, memorizing everyone within his line of vision just so he could know for sure that they were there and he stored it away until he needed it again, when he was sick with loneliness.

For some reason, his eyes kept being drawn towards the green-haired man who stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the regulars.

"Sanji!"

Sanji turned at the sound of his name to see Moodie, the blonde beauty. "Hello, darling," he said with a bright smile.

"I haven't seen you in a while," Moodie said, "Fullbody's gotten unbearable, you know. I was honestly thinking about taking you up on that offer, if you know what I mean?"

Sanji offered her a smile in return. Fake, forced, but not as forced as usual. "I wish I could, honey, but the head's got me running in circles." Placing a hand on her shoulder, he let it trail down her arm and rest on her elbow. "Hang in there, alright? You're far too pretty to be wasted on some idiot like Fullbody."

Moodie smiled and let out a giggle. "I'm pretty, am I?"

Sanji let out a short laugh of his own. "Absolutely stunning," he assured her. "Now, I have to get going but I'll see you later, okay, sweetie?"

Moodie nodded and returned back to her table, where she sat with the idiot lieutenant who knew nothing about being fair to a woman. Sanji didn't have much experience, to be honest, but it was clear that the way Fullbody showed her off like she was a trophy was not the right way to handle a woman. If your date felt the need to leave you to visit a worthless cook, a cook who was posing as waiter no less, and needed to be told she was pretty when it was obvious, something wasn't right.

He took a deep inhalation of his cigarette, letting it fill him before letting it out slowly, feeling it calm his head.

"Sanji, your order's here!"

Sanji quickly checked his watch. It was nine. Okay, he was still safe. Hopefully.

He dove into the kitchen quickly, grabbed Zoro's order and was half-way out the door when he was grabbed by the collar of his shirt and yanked back by a big, meaty hand.

Fuck.

"What were you doing out there, eh, shit cook?" demanded Patty. "Playing fucking servant?" He looked at the bowl of soup in Sanji's hands and scowled. "You wanna feed someone this shit? Fine, be my guest. You need to clean up the puke when they hurl though." Sanji lost his balance when Patty punctuated his sentence with a push forwards and Sanji tumbled out the swinging doors, the bowl falling from his tray. There was a clatter and everyone's eyes turned towards him. Including Zoro's. Fuck.

Sanji tried to ignore the eyes and the whispers as he cleaned up the mess quickly before racing back into the kitchen. Apparently, Patty was back from his break and he wasn't in the mood to see Sanji playing waiter. He knew already that it wouldn't be long before Patty started everyone up on the booze.

He ran to the backroom to make a fresh pot of the soup, mumbling under his breath all the while. _Wasting perfectly good food, the bastards_.

Once it was finished, he made extra sure that no one was around and quickly dashed out the kitchen doors. Speed was something he had learnt was very beneficial to him if he used it to his advantage. He could be in and out of the kitchen in no time at all, leaving the other cooks wondering if he had ever really been there to begin with.

He walked over to Zoro's table with a fake smile plastered on his face. His shirt clung to his body, still damp and probably smelling of soup but he ignored it and placed the soup on Zoro's table. "Sorry for the wait, there were ... complications," Sanji told him.

Zoro gazed at him, staring at his shirt. "Complications?" he repeated.

Sanji knew that Zoro had seen his fall, which meant he wasn't staring at his chest in order to identify the wet blotch, so then, why was he staring? He wasn't wearing white, there was no way Zoro could see the scars— was he … _checking him out_? Sanji mentally shook his head. That was preposterous. Paranoid anyway, he swiftly left Zoro to his own devices and headed towards his next client.

Once Zoro's food was ready, Sanji speedily went in and out of the kitchen, returning quickly before Patty had another chance to get to him. It was nine thirty and though he hated to admit it, Zoro's dining experience was probably crippled due to the long waits.

Placing the food on the table, this time Sanji stuck around, watching as Zoro ate, seeing the joy that flickered across his face with each bite he took. As Zoro cleaned his plate, Sanji spotted Moodie sitting next to Fullbody, a grimace on her face, tarnishing her beauty. That man was pure scum and yet somehow, a woman with as much beauty as Moodie had become his latest reluctant companion. It made Sanji's blood boil—

"—was yours, right?"

Sanji's head snapped back to Zoro and gave him a strange look. "Pardon?"

"That soup, it was yours, right? You made it."

Sanji could only nod numbly. How had this man figured it out before the press? Wasn't he stupid? Wasn't he the one who had thought the water had magical ice cubes? Was he still the same man?

"Anything for dessert, Mr. Roronoa?" asked Sanji, trying to cover up his surprise.

Zoro shook his head, no. "Can I have the check please?"

Sanji nodded and returned moments later with it in hand.

As Zoro was leafing through his wallet, searching for 130 00 yen, he paused briefly. "How's your diaphragm?"

Sanji looked at him in surprise, but tried to cover it quickly. "You're short about 50 00 yen," he said, changing the topic.

"Yeah, sorry 'bout that," said Zoro. "I don't really make that much and besides, I have to keep bailing my friends out of jail so with those fees and all—" Zoro coughed into his hand and Sanji wondered why the man was sharing so much.

It was official; Zoro Roronoa knew about the abuse of the cooks. Did he feel sorry for him? Was that why he was sharing so much? The last thing Sanji wanted was pity. What could he possibly do to keep Zoro from telling? How could he make Zoro forget?

Seeing the trouble the green-haired man was in, Sanji came up with an idea. It was a long-shot but he needed to try it.

Leaning over the table, Sanji lowered his voice. "I'll let it slide, the money I mean, if you forget about what you saw."

Zoro looked at him in shock, his eyes widening.

"So?" Sanji asked. "What do you say?"

"Fuck no!"

Everyone turned to Zoro's table once again and Sanji sighed, biting down harshly on his cigarette. Would it kill the moron to be quiet? Last night it was the moan (a very seductive moan, Sanji had to admit) and now it was the screaming. Honestly!

Sanji sent him a glare and Zoro at least had the sense to look slightly embarrassed. "Fuck no," he repeated in a quieter voice.

Sanji sighed and took a long drag of the cigar before letting it out slowly. "What do you want?" he asked. "What's it going to take for you to forget?"

Without a moment of thought, Zoro replied, "This table."

Sanji let out a laugh. "Sorry Mr. Roronoa, we don't sell them. Go out to a nice furniture store, I'm sure you can find one just like it."

Zoro gritted his teeth. "No, you bastard, that's not what I meant. I meant I want this table reserved for me. Every night."

Sanji raised a surprised eyebrow. Last night the man could barely pay, now he couldn't pay in full and he wanted reservations every night? "Okay," Sanji said disbelievingly.

"I want this table reserved for me every night," Zoro repeated, "and I'll pay you whatever's in my wallet. All of it. If I have 150 00 yen, I'll give it to you, even if the meal only costs me 125 00 yen. Whatever cash is in my wallet at the time, I'll use to pay you. The whole contents of it."

"What, nothing left for gas money?" Sanji sneered.

Zoro glared. "Do we have a deal?"

Sanji looked at him and paused. "If I do this, reserve this table for you every night that is, will you forget what you saw?"

Zoro nodded. "On my honour."

"Oh, a swordsman's honour! It's practically like God's word!"

"Do we have a deal or not?" snapped Zoro.

Sanji sighed and crumbled his used cigarette, taking out another from his blazer pocket. He put it between his lips and lit it with his lighter, before pocketing it. The new cigarette allowed him to fill his lungs with the smoke before letting it out. "Deal." Looking behind him, he saw Patty's silhouette in the kitchen doors and instantly knew trouble was coming. "Now, if you would excuse me, Mr. Roronoa, I have a job to do."

"Zoro," the swordsman said. "Call me Zoro."

Sanji let out a bitter laugh that held no happiness or joy. He sent him a harsh glare. "Don't push it."

With that, he walked towards the kitchen, already able to feel the rolling pin crushing his ribs.

* * *

 **Author's Note #2:** _Now for the thank yous!_

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : Well, Zoro did come back! He came back and he will be coming back much more often, or else we wouldn't really have a story, would we? Anyway, i hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thanks for being the first one to review!_

 _fanfiction lover 228: Thank you! I really wanted to be original and that episode (which number I can't remember), in which the cooks were really mean to Sanji about his soup (which is the "famous soup" mentioned in this chapter) made me think about, what if it wasn't an act? Because they legitly convinced me until they admitted to it and I can imagine with the way Patty and Carne look, they could totally be abusive. Therefore, this story was born and I'm glad you like it!_

 _a1wonder50: I did not know that, but until I can think of another reason why Zoro would stay and try to get to Sanji after his meal was done, I'm sorry, but Zoro will have to want to tip him, otherwise the story doesn't move along. I have been looking further into things so I can use proper terminology, but I'm not Japanese, so I'm probably going to screw up a few times. I also realized that Zoro never said "Itadakimasu", but then I realized with manners like Zoro's, you'd never really expect him to say that anyway. I will try to think of another way to get Zoro near the kitchen though and the first chapter will be changed once that way makes sense! Thank you for telling me!_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 5th 2015**


	3. Hello Stranger

_**Author's Note:** Okay, some notes on some of the things in here. One being that last night, I stayed up really late and read through a lot of people's profiles on the One Piece wikipedia. During this time, I learnt that Zoro had never had sushi and was fascinated with it and that Zoro also hated chocolate. I learnt that Sanji would be French had he not been a fictional character and he probably would've been a hair dresser or stylist had he not been a pirate. I would've thought he'd have owned a restaurant. Anyway, it mentioned which cigarette brands Sanji used, so I put them in here. Another thing is learning that Sanji's smoking was completely altered in an English dub version of **One Piece** by a lollipop. A fucking lollipop. Just imagine it for a moment please. Anyway, most of these things I've said about Sanji are purely because I believe I could see Sanji being like that. I know that Zoro comes off kind of stupid here, but hey, what are you gonna do? This chapter is kind of rushed cause I kinda want to get to the good part. In terms of chapters, I have at least 26 of them totally planned, but they're not all written. The next update will take longer cause the chapters are going to start becoming longer. Thanks for the reviews will be below! I REALLY like getting reviews and if I can get 5 for this chapter, I will be encouraged to work harder and faster to make the next one come out sooner. I don't own **One Piece.**_

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 3: Hello Stranger

* * *

The Baratie was going to run him bankrupt.

Zoro knew it was expensive, but he came every night with some comfort knowing that he wouldn't have to convince the "receptionist" as Sanji had called them, to let him in because this time around, he had a reservation. He knew an easy way to keep his deal with the cook without needing to pay a single yen, being if he just left his house with nothing in his wallet, then he couldn't empty its contents to the blond, but he knew that would be stupid to do and besides, with the food they served, they definitely deserved some sort of payment.

He was pretty sure Johnny was regretting telling him about the Baratie since he hadn't gone out for drinks with him and his friend, Yosaku, in quite a while. In fact, he had only been ordering water so he had been sober for a new record of time. Somehow, Sanji, who had known him for perhaps a week total, had managed to quell his minor (it hardly even existed, as far as Zoro was concerned) drinking problem while Yosaku and Johnny were grasping at straws. They found that a drunk Zoro was one of the most amusing things they had ever seen and stocked up on sake whenever he came to visit them, but at the same time, they realized they were killing his liver but weren't able to stop buying the damn alcohol.

Taking his usual seat, Zoro watched the cook with an intense gaze that he usually used to size up his opponents. He was able to watch every one of Sanji's moves as he walked around the restaurant and he wondered if this time, he was being allowed to serve. It had become clear to him that the first time he had come to the Baratie, Sanji was not a waiter and was not permitted into the dinning hall, but maybe it was better? He didn't seem to be walking with a limp, nor were any of his fingers looking crushed or damaged in any way. When Sanji set down his water, Zoro saw that he wasn't holding his ribs anymore, which meant that whatever damage that ladle had inflicted on him was long gone.

He gave Sanji a small smile and the cook stared back at him. Zoro learnt pretty quickly that Sanji didn't know how to deal with smiles.

Enough meals had passed that Sanji's unease around Zoro must have been relieved, or at least, he didn't look at Zoro as though he were an overly-suspicious person. Zoro still didn't know a thing about Sanji though and that irked him. Here he was, spending all of his money to eat at a fancy restaurant every night, giving up his liquor so he'd still have money the next morning, all to watch over some cook whom he knew absolutely nothing about. Whenever he thought about it too hard, he always asked himself why he was doing this in the first place, but since he could never give himself a satisfactory answer, he always pushed it to the back of his mind. Finally, he decided enough was enough. He would learn something about the tall cook if it was the last thing he did.

As Sanji set down his appetizer, Zoro readied himself to attack.

"Here you are, Mr. Roronoa, bon appetite."

Zoro opened his mouth, ready to ask a question to the blond cook when he realized something.

He had no fucking clue what to say.

It was puzzling that though Zoro knew nothing about Sanji, he didn't even know where to begin when it came to asking him questions. Moreover, he didn't even know if Sanji would answer any of his questions. He knew any inquires about his injuries were completely and totally off-limits— it was part of their deal after all— but there had to be more to the cook than a few scars and bruises.

"If you would close your mouth, Mr. Roronoa, it would be ever helpful. People are starting to stare," said Sanji with a smirk.

"What's your favourite colour?"

What. The. Hell?

Zoro wanted to hit himself. _What's your favourite colour?_ How old was he, a fucking preschooler? Surely there was a better question he could find in his arsenal to ask the cook, but instead of asking a different, more sensible one, he waited. Fucking Christ, he was actually waiting for the cook to tell him his favourite colour. What the fuck was wrong with him?

Sanji raised a curly brow at him. "I don't see how this is relevant to your meal—"

"What's. Your. Favourite. Colour?" Zoro repeated, this time in a growling voice he saved for competitions to intimidate his opponent. Jesus, it was just a colour, would it really matter if he didn't know Sanji's favourite colour? But for some reason, Zoro's mouth had decided the most important thing was knowing the cook's preference in pigments, and so, he waited while his brain called him over a thousand different kinds of idiot.

"Don't have one."

Zoro stared at him and blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. Then—

 _"What the fuck do you mean you don't have one?!"_

At this point, Zoro didn't even have to check to know that everyone was staring at him. He was used to it now and besides, he wasn't going to apologize. "Don't have one," he mimicked in a high pitched tone.

"Mr. Roronoa, I believe that's a horrible misrepresentation of my—"

"What kind of a fucking answer is that?" Zoro demanded, getting out of his seat, slamming his hands onto the table and glaring at the cook who merely continued to smirk, taking in a deep lungful of smoke before exhaling.

"I. Don't. Have. One," Sanji repeated slowly. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have other clients to tend to."

With that, the blond turned around and left Zoro standing there, unable to fathom a response.

For a reason Zoro would never know, he went home that night feeling slightly satisfied that he knew Sanji had no preference in colour (but seriously, what kind of a fucking answer is "I don't have one"?).

The next night, Zoro took his seat at his table and before Sanji could even welcome him, he said, "Blue."

"Pardon?"

"Blue. My favourite colour's blue," Zoro told Sanji through gritted teeth.

"I never asked," Sanji said.

"Yeah well, I'm fucking telling you since you prefer not to tell me," Zoro snapped.

Sanji nodded slowly. There was silence and then— "Would've thought it'd be green."

Zoro gave him an incredulous look and ordered his usual water. When Sanji placed his glass of water on the table as usual, he leaned closer to Zoro and whispered, "Black."

Followed by which, Zoro was stared at once more for screaming about how black wasn't a fucking colour, it was a shade, all the while the calm cook smoked his damn cigarette.

That night, Zoro felt even more content for even more reasons he didn't know, simply repeating to himself over and over again that Sanji was a fucking idiot and black wasn't a colour, it was a shade, and a damn shitty one at that, but for some reason, Sanji thought it was a colour and it was his favourite. And for some other reason that Zoro didn't know, that was all that mattered.

After going to the Baratie nightly for a month, Zoro knew the following things about the curly browed cook:

He enjoyed classical music, specifically Chopin

He was rather fond of e.e cummings

He had almost all of William Shakespeare's greatest works (and some of his lesser-known ones) memorized and could recite them at a drop of a hat

He had read every book by Charles Dickens

He hated politics and had no clue who the fuck was in the Diet

He thought cooking shows were pointless and no one should make money off of showing others how to make a turkey when Thanksgiving came.

He smoked King Ground cigarettes, but also liked Death.

He was twenty-three

His favourite colour was black (even if black was a fucking shade)

Zoro learnt quite a few other things about Sanji, even if Sanji never told them to him directly. After watching Sanji long enough, he realized he was right handed, judging by the hand that held his cigarette. He also learnt that Sanji didn't read the news at all (which explained why he couldn't tell Zoro which section of the newspaper he enjoyed most), from the way he always seemed surprised when Zoro told him about the latest story about how a paralyzed man somehow managed to walk again. Sanji called it bullshit.

Of all the things Zoro came to know about his cook it had to be that unless you asked, you would never know a thing about him and even then, he was reluctant to give out information. It was a slow process, trying to piece together who Sanji was from the brief, not to mention vague encounters he had with him. It wasn't until he had been to the Baratie for a month and a half that Zoro ever saw Sanji unguarded and it wasn't even at the restaurant itself that it happened.

* * *

Zoro grumbled, walking down the long aisles, looking for some eggs. He was pretty sure he was in the dairy section, but then again, if it truly _was_ the dairy section, why was the olive oil there too? Realizing his fridge was completely empty had been a bother for Zoro. He wasn't the greatest in terms of direction so whenever he found the supermarket, he'd stock up to prevent himself from having to go through the terror of wandering the streets aimlessly like an idiot for half an hour before he finally swallowed his pride and looked at a map (never ask a person, that leaves a witness to your directional weakness).

As he picked up a can of beans (seriously, what the fuck was up with this dairy section?), he spotted blond hair out of the corner of his eye. He honestly would've thought nothing of it, had it not been for the smell of nicotine that was coming from that general direction.

"Fucking bastards," he heard the blond mutter. "Do your own grocery shopping, you lazy assholes."

Zoro watched the man's back. He was wearing a white shirt with a pair of black pants and black boots. The way he moved, practically on the tips of his toes, was too familiar to be a coincidence.

"Curly Brow?"

Immediately, the blond stiffened. Zoro could picture him gritting his teeth with a firmly set jaw, that cigarette probably grinding against his teeth. He started to retreat, as though by backing away slowly, Zoro would forget having seen him, but he stopped suddenly, keeling over. Holding his stomach, Sanji coughed harshly before trying to straighten himself up, but he pushed against a shelf and knocked over several cans of soup, falling forward instead.

"Fuck," Sanji muttered, picking up the cans.

"Didn't know you were such a klutz," Zoro said, though his eyes held worry. He bent down next to Sanji and began to help him clean up when Sanji slapped his hand away.

"I don't need your fucking help," he snapped.

"Yeah well, too bad, you're getting it anyway, Curly Brow," Zoro replied. Picking up a can of Canbell soup, Zoro frowned. "What kind of fucking dairy section is this?"

Sanji rolled his eyes and pulled the can out of his grasp. "It's not the dairy section, you marimo!"

Zoro stared at him blankly. _What the fuck is a marimo?_ Zoro shook his head, pushing the thought aside. "I'm trying to be a nice person, so shut up and be grateful, dammit," he snapped. He grabbed the can out of Sanji's hands and placed it back on the shelf with a triumphant smile, as though this was something that he was infinitely proud of. It didn't really matter in the grand scheme of things and since Sanji was being such an ass, he should've been glad Zoro was even bothering!

Sanji grumbled, no doubt realizing that there was no way Zoro was going to give up and the two of them cleaned up the aisle together while the other shoppers stared and pointed on the occasion. There was even a little boy who walked up to Zoro and asked him if he was a fairy. Zoro had nearly struck Sanji in the head with the can of soup that was in his hand at that moment to stop the idiot from laughing at his expense, but had held back, remembering the cook's wince when he had keeled over.

After they finished, Zoro stood up. "Well Curly Brow, perhaps I should join you on your shopping adventure?"

Sanji raised his curly brow. "Pardon?"

Zoro found it incredibly strange how Sanji never said "excuse me". Instead, he merely said, "pardon" and gave Zoro a blank look. It was a little peculiar in his opinion, just a little too polite that reminded him of the way he found overly polite and stuck-up people to be assholes but for some reason, Sanji's politeness didn't turn him off the way others did.

"Well, we wouldn't want you destroying the store, now would we?" Zoro asked, elaborating his point.

"I wouldn't destroy the store," Sanji said indignantly.

Zoro stared at the cigarette in between Sanji's lips. "You're a walking fire hazard."

"Yes well, I think I'll manage just fine," Sanji told him with a frown. Pushing his cart in the opposite direction, he tried to avoid Zoro, but Zoro quickly got in front of him, stopping him from leaving the aisle. "Move it, Marimo."

"No."

Zoro was patient. He was stubborn. He could totally out-wait the cook, hands down. He just had to make sure he didn't do anything stupid that would make him a real nuisance. Why he wanted to follow the cook was beyond him. Perhaps it was because he was a friendly face— well, not that friendly, but still— and he knew relatively where he was going.

Sanji sighed. "You're not going to move until I let you come with me, are you?"

Zoro shook his head.

Sanji sighed again, more exasperatedly and far too dramatic than necessary. "Fine, whatever. You'll look like a lost puppy though."

Zoro smirked, glad to have won and began to walk beside Sanji and his cart. "So wait," he said slowly, "if we're not in the diary section, where the fuck are we?"

* * *

Following Sanji while he did his groceries was actually a lot of fun, surprisingly. At least, Zoro didn't get bored. Sanji got into fights over prices and he got yelled at several times for smoking inside the store before Sanji gave them the finger and told them to fuck off. Sanji loaded his cart with enough carrots to feed a barn of horses and when Zoro pointed that out, Sanji replied with he was purchasing this food for the sake of the restaurant, which needed to have a full supply if they wanted to make just about anything on the menu.

When they finally got to the cash register, Zoro was torn between conversing with Sanji and flipping through the various magazines that lay on the rack. Sanji scoffed when he saw the tabloids and Zoro remembered once again Sanji disliked reading things that involved the lives of other people. Or at least, he didn't enjoy any form of news, televised, or written.

Zoro picked up a cooking magazine, curious if perhaps, just maybe, Sanji enjoyed them. "Hey!" Zoro said, pointing at an article. "There's a review for the Baratie in here!"

"Oh yeah?" asked Sanji, sounding somewhat interested in something other than picking a fight for the first time that day.

"Yeah," Zoro said. "It gives the Baratie four and a half stars. _The food is delicious with melt-in-your-mouth aftertaste that leaves customers dying for another bite. The decor of the restaurant utilizes a pale colour scheme and the waiters are outstandingly polite, with the exception of a certain curly browed cook—"_

Sanji grabbed the magazine out of Zoro's hands and it was at that moment that Zoro realized Sanji's left hand was bandaged. It was wrapped clumsily in gauze and there was a crimson stain over his index finger.

"What is that?" asked Zoro, as the line moved along. The person behind them yelled something about how "the green-haired freak should use his fucking feet". Zoro didn't feel like telling him that he had just rhymed and instead he turned to Sanji with a serious expression on his face.

"What's what?" Sanji asked.

Zoro's eyes narrowed in on the gauze and Sanji's eyes followed his.

"Oh." Sanji paled, but fisted his hand and turned his head away before Zoro could tell if he was imagining it. "It's nothing. Besides, why the fuck do you care?"

"Your ribs are hurting too, aren't they?" Zoro remembered the way Sanji had keeled over, holding his side. "I know I'm in no position to say this, but I think you should go to the hospital."

"You're right," Sanji snapped. "You have no fucking right to tell me that, so don't."

Zoro's brow furrowed. He was only trying to help and the asshole got all defensive! Though, Zoro supposed, he could understand why Sanji was reluctant to accept help and from a total stranger too. Well, no, that was wrong. Zoro liked to think that he and Sanji had become "acquaintances" at the very least. Sanji served him every time he sat down at his table with that silly cigarette in his mouth; Zoro thought it couldn't hurt to serve Sanji some medical aid. And not the shitty kind that did up his bandaging.

"But I really think—"

"I don't give a fuck about what you think," Sanji cut him off. "That wasn't the deal we had." Fuming, Sanji moved forward in the line and took out his wallet, leafing through his money.

The person in front of them at the cashier finished up and Sanji handed his things to the man behind the counter.

"Okay, fair," Zoro agreed, "but you need help. At least, I think you do and you're too damn fucking prideful to go looking for it so I think it's only fair that I tell you my opinion on your personal well-being!" Zoro sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Besides, the deal applies when I'm on Baratie properly, which I'm currently not."

"We never said that," Sanji snapped, handing over his money to the cashier.

"Yeah well, it was in the subtext!"

"Then write down a fucking contract if you need to, but if it includes that, I'm not fucking signing it!" Sanji snapped. Grabbing his bagged groceries, he left Zoro standing there at the check-out, the man behind him yelling at him to "get a fucking move on", while he simply tried to collect his thoughts.

When Zoro got back into his car, he sat behind the driver's wheel silently and thought.

Sanji was a tough man. He knew that. Quick as a whip and talented (at least at cooking), well-grounded, probably had a lot of self-discipline and could probably hold his own as well. Surely someone like him wouldn't have trouble getting himself out a scrape like this, would he? Perhaps Sanji just wasn't a good fighter when it came down to it, maybe he was just weak— no. Sanji was not weak.

Perhaps Zoro had never seen Sanji fight for himself against the cooks, but he could see it in his eyes. Sanji had a fire in his eyes, slightly dimmer than it probably was originally, but it was still there and it would probably remain there for quite some time. Sanji was _not_ weak.

So why wasn't Sanji finding himself help? He was prideful, but surely when it came to a scenario of physical abuse, that must mean that he had some sense of self-preservation and looked for help somewhere, regardless of the blow to his ego.

Unless it was more than just physical.

Were they also mentally abusing him? He heard the insults, sure, but was there more than that? Were they threatening him to stay? Were they holding him hostage and blackmailing him? What was the truth behind the Baratie?

It was once Zoro finally got home (after taking five wrong turns, nearly going through a red light twice and circling around a building three times), he walked into his small apartment, flipped on the light, threw his keys on the couch and the moment he sunk into the comfy cushions, realized something.

 _Shit, I forgot to buy my groceries._

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:**_ _Note about something: I said Sanji had no idea who was in the Diet. Now, it's not a food diet. Since I figured Sanji wasn't the type to like politics, I decided to look into Japanese politics and figure out how their government worked. I still have no idea how exactly its run, but the Diet is basically a group of people who are chosen by the people of a certain city (I believe) and the members of the diet are the ones who chose their ruler, or something like that. I could be totally wrong though, so don't take my word for it!_

 _Okay, now for the thank yous!_

 _a1wonder50 : That is a good idea, but I'm not quite sure since I don't think Zoro has the patience to wait around till the restaurant closes. I dunno, I could use it, thanks for the suggestion!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : Well, given Sanji's situation, he kind of has a right to be paranoid, don't you think? Thanks for reviewing and I'm really happy that I got thanked for writing this story! I think it's funny when people thank me for doing something I love._

 _Guest : I am REALLY bad at writing flirting scenes. See, the thing is, with my own original stories that I write, all of my characters who have romantic relationships (cause the main focus of those stories aren't romance, their fantasy/humour/friendship kind of stories) are really dysfunctional and entertaining, but really weird. Like, insults are their way of flirting so I wasn't intending on having Zoro flirt with Sanji, but if you saw it that way, I can understand why. I think Zoro's an honest person in general, so really, there's no reason for him to be secretive and I'm glad you think it's realistic, if there's anything I aim for besides being in character (which is kinda being thrown out the window for this story) it's developing realistic relationships that someone could potentially see. I want their relationship to develop gradually and the way I believe, people in this situation with Zoro and Sanji's personalities, would._

 _lilcutieprincess : The thing about Sanji and savate ... the thing is, I never really understood how he learnt how to do all that while he was with Zeff, cause he was training him to cook, right? I thought he kinda picked up his version of savate through watching the other cooks fight, but anyway, you'll see about Sanji and his self-defence methods and such._

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 5th 2015**


	4. Would Anyone Care?

**_Author's_** _ **Note:** Okay so my mom recently bought new steak knives cause she claims ours are shit and I was like, "I wonder if Sanji has steak knives that look this scary?". I know nothing about knives and stuff so just about everything stated in here is based off an amateur. I do not own **One Piece**. Also, this is where stuff gets a little ... bad. Okay, lie, they get REALLY bad. I've never written a scene like this before, so bear with me here. I know everyone's out of character, but this is an AU! Also, answers to your reviews are welcome! I really hope I didn't screw this chapter up, please review, no flames!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: (Yes, we've gotten to the point where we need warnings)**

 **The following things are present in the latest chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Self-harm**

 **Rape**

 **Suicidal thoughts**

* * *

Chapter 4: Would Anyone Care?

* * *

 _SMACK!_

Sanji tried not to flinch as the spatula came down on him forcefully. He had learnt better than to try and dodge the attacks. That was a pointless goal and besides, in the end it did him nothing but earn more strikes from the merciless cooks. Patty had already counted to eight. He had two more to go before they let him be. No, that was wrong. He was never allowed to just _be_. He was allowed breaks in between beatings and nothing more. At least, that's how Sanji had come to see his life.

"Count them!" demanded Patty once more.

Sanji also learnt that the worst thing he could do was become emotionless. Though he remembered vaguely being told that bullies enjoy getting rises out of others and that if you left them alone and didn't react, surely they would get bored and move onto their next target, at the Baratie, this was not the case. In fact, if he pretended nothing happened Patty and Carne would hit him worse and act even harsher because everyone has a breaking point and they didn't plan on stopping until they reached Sanji's.

 _SMACK!_

"Nine," Sanji said through gritted teeth, refusing to let out a whimper. Whimpering was weak. His dignity may have left him quite a few years ago and maybe his ego was bruised, but his pride would never waver, not even for Patty.

 _SMACK!_

"Ten."

"Good," said Patty, sounding satisfied. Pushing Sanji forward, he threw the spatula down next to him and let out a long laugh. "Clean up the kitchen, shit cook." Kicking flour in Sanji's direction, he spat on the floor. "We'll be back tomorrow."

 _Of course you will._

Sanji listened as the door to the restaurant closed and was locked. Closing his eyes tightly, Sanji refused to cry and got up, slightly unsteady on his feet, looking around himself to figure out how long it would take him before he could get some sleep.

There was broken glass on the floor, the remains of another broken dish, wasted food had been spilt and the dishes still weren't done. The room had to be spotless for when they opened tomorrow morning.

With shaking hands, Sanji got the broom and began to sweep the floor, making sure not to step in any glass as he swept it away. The kitchen wasn't all that big, at least, to him it wasn't, but the mess the others left was daunting and as usual, he found himself wondering if he'd ever be able to clean it.

After an hour of sweeping, the flour had been swept away and thrown into the trash (such a waste) and Sanji could clean the tables. The cooks enjoyed leaving their used pots and pans everywhere and clearing the tables of everything was hard. Placing all the used dishware into the already flooding sink, Sanji went to work at cleaning the tables.

For a reason he wouldn't dare admit, cleaning the tables had to be his least favourite thing to do.

They were stainless steel and he was able to see his reflection in them perfectly as he wiped them down, getting rid of left over pieces of lettuce and the like. When it was done, he had no choice but to look at his own reflection, no matter how much it pained him.

When Sanji looked into the mirror-like table, he saw a skinny man with arms and legs too long for his body. He saw blond hair that looked so plain, it was like having straw for hair. He saw a dull blue eye and wished for the thousandth time his hair would allow him to cover both, but of course, fate was cruel in such a way that it was impossible. He saw lips that were too cracked to possibly look attractive and he saw eyebrows that … did he even have to think about them?

Biting his bottom lip (horribly cracked, horribly swollen from the punishment involving the rolling pin), he closed his eyes and turned away, instead focusing his attention on the large pile of things that needed to be washed.

The Baratie closed at eleven every night and opened itself once more at ten in the morning. The cooks often left the Baratie at eleven forty-five, after giving Sanji his nightly punishment for being out waitering again. Zoro had kept to his promise and his constant visits were making Sanji suffer. He knew if anyone else were to cater to the swordsman, he would be thrown out in the blink of an eye and he wanted him to keep quiet. He wouldn't dare let himself think that he enjoyed playing mind games with him as the marimo played Twenty Questions.

At one in the morning, Sanji was putting away the last of the dishware and was beyond exhausted. He was surprised he managed to get up every morning and serve the customers as he did. Patty had come to allow it, but that meant that Sanji acknowledged that he was to be severely punished each night, at least three times harder than usual. Stupid fucking Marimo, causing him trouble even when he wasn't there.

The steak knife slipped out of his hands at the last second, slicing his finger harshly. He stared at the blood as it trickled down his finger slowly. Turning over his finger, he stared at it, as though entranced by the colour, watching it as it stained his pale skin. It had been a while since he had bled exteriorly.

Staring at the knife on the countertop, he saw the small blotch on the counter of his blood.

Rolling up his sleeves, Sanji stared at his wrists. They healed each and every time, but the small white scars were a reminder of what he had done. Now that he thought about it, since Zoro had started coming by, he hadn't been thinking about it nearly as much.

Maybe that Marimo was good for something.

Sanji let out a bitter smile, one that didn't reach his eyes, and put the knife away after cleaning it once more. He wiped the counter clean and with that, shut the lights in the kitchen.

He made it a few steps into the dinning hall before he fell asleep on the floor.

* * *

When Sanji woke up, it was dark.

Of course it was dark. The cooks hated sunlight and acted like vampires. They shut the curtains and with the lights off in the dinning hall during the night and Sanji's exhaustion the night before, it was no wonder it was pitch black.

Sanji felt around blindly for something to grab onto. His hands found a chair and using it, he pushed himself up onto his unsteady feet. The room spun around him, probably from lack of sleep, and he forced himself into the kitchen. Turning back on the lights, he prepared the soup for the day, trying his hardest not to fall asleep into the pot.

When the other cooks came in, it didn't take them long to wreck the hard work Sanji had put into the cleaning the night before. They were careless and enjoyed throwing things around, using unnecessary dishes just to make more work for him at night.

Like every day, he felt as though the rough start to his day was an omen from above of how horrible the rest of his day would be.

* * *

One thing he could count on Zoro Roronoa being, bedsides annoying, was punctual. It was a surprise to learn that the green-haired Marimo wasn't as scatter-brained as Sanji thought, despite the fact that he couldn't tell the difference between a shrimp fork and a salad fork (honestly, who didn't know the difference?). Zoro never failed to walk into the Baratie at eight thirty every night, sit down at his table, order water and then spice things up with a different appetizer and main course every time.

Sanji still remembered what Zoro had told him the night before his nightly visits.

 _"I don't really make that much and besides, I have to keep bailing my friends out of jail so with those fees and all—"_

Sanji chuckled to himself at the memory. So Zoro was friends with troublemakers, was he? Well, it made sense that a reckless man had reckless friends. He wouldn't be surprised if he found out Zoro had a bounty on his head.

A few days after Zoro had begun to come to the restaurant nightly, Sanji had decided it was important to know all he could about his customers, especially the customer that was practically blackmailing him. He had searched Zoro up on the internet and the results had been interesting.

He was a three time Kendo champion and placed second worldwide, only to be outdone by some man named Mihawk. He was said to have a love for sake and enjoyed meditation. He was a kenjutsu prodigy and martial arts were said to be a hobby of his. That was about all the Internet knew about the great Zoro Roronoa. He didn't speak much during interviews and liked to keep to himself. He stayed out of the tabloids and the press seemed to think fondly of him (not that Sanji did much more than skim through the articles, after all, they could be nothing but lies, couldn't they?), so Sanji had come to the conclusion that having Zoro as a client at the Baratie wasn't a crime against humanity and no horrible gossip or rumours should spread from his nightly visits.

For some reason that he couldn't understand, Sanji found himself looking forward to Zoro's visits. He was certainly a different kind of customer than the usual clientele. He would make a ruckus, some way or another, making the entire restaurant fall silent, before he sent the others a death glare and continued on eating. It was entertaining to say the least.

Sanji sucked up the whole day, from Mr. Motzel asking him about their wine to Fullbody bringing in Moodie and mistreating her. He handled it all with grace, as far as he was concerned, until Zoro came.

If another waiter were to pay attention to Sanji, they would notice a change when eight thirty came around.

Sanji stood tall and straight with a firm grip on his tray at all times. He flashed phoney smiles and kept a straight face, always being polite and never missing a beat.

When Zoro walked through the doors, looking confused as he always did (something to do with his horrible sense of direction, as far as Sanji was concerned), Sanji would drop whoever he was serving at the moment and rush to Zoro. Of course, he wasn't careless. He didn't just leave his tray behind as he pranced over to the reception desk; no, he gently told the clients that he had elsewhere to be for a few moments and then he went prancing over to the reception desk. He would deny the prance, but one of the waiters had seen him at it once.

Once, but once was enough when you worked at the Baratie. And that one time that they saw him happened to be the reason why Sanji's life just got harder.

* * *

"Mr. Roronoa, your usual table, I assume?" asked Sanji, leading the way to the Marimo's usual seat. It wasn't as though he would suddenly change it; after all, he had asked for the table in the first place.

Zoro gave him a nod and as usual, the under-dressed swordsman took his seat. Tonight he wore a plain white shirt with a pair of black pants and sneakers. Only Zoro would walk into a fancy, high-class restaurant and decide that sneakers were appropriate footwear.

"Thank you, cook," he told Sanji.

Sanji would never admit it, but the fact that Zoro always remembered his position in the kitchen pleased him immensely.

"Water?"

"Am I getting that predictable?"

Sanji would also never admit that he felt the strongest urge to smile genuinely around the swordsman. If he ever did confess to it, it would surely inflate the idiot's already big ego. No doubt the trophies and medals were already enough to feed it.

"You? Predictable? Never."

Sanji handed him the menu and Zoro frowned, flipping through it. "I don't know why you bother now a days," said Zoro. "I'm pretty sure I've memorized this thing."

Sanji smirked. "Well, it's customary for me to give it to you. Remember, you're no different from the average client."

But he was. And Sanji would never say it to his face.

"I think I'll have … Kaiseki Ryori. It was good the last time," Zoro noted, his eyes glazing over as he remembered it.

Even if Zoro didn't know it, he was doing wonders for Sanji's self-esteem, the way he practically had an orgasm every time he ate one of Sanji's meals had the blond running in circles, wondering what spices to use next to tantalize the swordsman's tastebuds. Of course, soon after he thought of such things he would remind himself that Zoro was not the only customer at the Baratie and should not receive with any special treatment. Still, Sanji felt as though his dishes kept getting better the more Zoro ate them.

"Of course. And for your appetizer?"

"Tamago egg," Zoro decided, closing the menu with a grin on his face. "You gonna cook it well, I hope, cook?"

Sanji gave him a smile, one that was probably the closest to sincere he had ever given. "Don't I always?"

Zoro laughed and shooed him away, telling him to prepare his meal and hurry; he had a tournament tomorrow.

* * *

When the Baratie was cleared and they were close to closing time, Sanji entered the kitchen with a few empty glasses. He was humming as he did so to no particular song, when he bumped into Patty.

Instantly, his good mood was gone. The glasses crashed to the floor, breaking into thousands of pieces and he knew instantly he'd have to clean them up. Today hadn't been as bad as he had thought it would be, but trust Patty to ruin a perfectly decent day in the blink of an eye.

"Sorry," Sanji said, bending over to pick up the broken glass.

 _SMACK_!

Instantly, Sanji lurched forward when the spatula made contact with his ass.

He was pulled up by the back of his collar to come face to face with Carne, who was grinning with a far too evil gleam in his eye. "Did you like that?" he asked, snarling.

Sanji couldn't find words so he opened his mouth and closed it like a gaping fish. What was going on?

"Does Roronoa do this to you?" demanded Patty, smacking him once more, harder this time.

"Roronoa?" Sanji repeated. Zoro? What were they talking about Zoro for? What did Zoro have to do with this?

"Strip him."

It was the only warning Sanji got before the other cooks began to grab at his clothes, pulling at his shirt and his pants, yanking at his tie and his blazer. He felt his knees give in and he fell to the floor, hearing the fabric tear. It didn't take him long to figure out what was going on.

"Fucking bastards," Sanji said through gritted teeth when Carne grabbed the spatula from Patty and smacked him again, this time across the face. Sanji's cheek stung horribly but he bit his lip and refused to cry. Of course, the cooks were bastards, that he already knew, but were they really going to—?

"Open his mouth."

Rough hands grabbed at Sanji's jaw, forcing it open. He watched as Patty dropped his pants and took his cock in his hand. He walked over to Sanji slowly, rubbing his cock harshly with his big, meaty hand. His hands weren't the only big thing about him. He had to be … _eight inches?_ Sanji didn't think now was the time for good math.

Without warning, Patty shoved his cock into Sanji's mouth.

"Suck, bitch," he commanded.

Sanji shook his head, feeling like choking. Nothing had ever tasted as bad as having Patty in his mouth.

 _SMACK!_

The spatula hit him harshly in the rear and he was forced forward, his mouth widening more and taking in more of Patty. "I said suck, slut!" repeated Patty. "Suck me like you do that Roronoa bastard."

Sanji tried to pull away, to get off of him, but Patty gripped his head harshly and forced him to take him. "Suck my cock, whore!"

Sanji took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He didn't want to, he _really_ didn't want to, but Patty was choking him and as much as he knew he was going to regret it later, he knew he had to comply. He didn't know what would happen if he defied Patty and with Sanji nude and defenceless, Patty had the upper-hand.

Closing his eyes tightly, Sanji slowly began to suck Patty, fisting his hands and trying to stop himself from choking. Patty still had a firm grip on his hair and was forcing more of himself into Sanji's mouth each time Sanji tried to breathe. Carne was sitting on his legs, preventing him from moving them and he had his spatula in hand, ready to hit him should he have to.

Sanji's stomach felt sick and he was ready to hurl, but he continued, feeling the tears in the back of his eyes, but he held them in. He would not cry. He was already sinking so low, he would not cry.

"Use your tongue, cocksucker," Patty commanded.

Sanji shook his head—

 _SMACK!_

"I said use your tongue!" Patty declared. "Suck me, or is my cock not good enough when compared to Roronoa's?" The mention of Zoro's name made Sanji grit his teeth in anger. There they went again, throwing around Zoro's name. "Shit, are you a fucking moron? You don't use your fucking teeth!" Patty screamed at him. "Carne, spank him good for me!"

 _SMACK!_

 _SMACK!_

 _SMACK!_

Sanji couldn't take anymore into his mouth and he was sure his ass couldn't handle another beating. He whined as he hesitantly brought his tongue around as he sucked, hating himself with each stroke of the muscle.

"There we go," Patty exclaimed. "That's a good cocksucker!"

Suddenly, Sanji felt something in his ass. Instantly, he froze. No. They couldn't do this, _they couldn't!_ Sanji felt the tears ready to spill over, but knowing the cooks as he did, he knew it wouldn't be good. If he cried, they would only be harsher.

It was too big to be a finger, which meant—

"Fuck, he's tight!"

Sanji wanted to hit something. He could feel someone else holding his legs down while Carne pounded into him harshly, forcing Sanji's body to jerk forward with each thrust. He fell onto Patty's cock and the cook seemed to enjoy it. He was gripping Sanji's hair tightly, swearing profanities loud enough that Sanji was sure the shop across the street heard.

 _No. No one should hear this. This is my humiliation, it can't leave this room! I can't … they can't …_

"He's sucking me in, Patty!" declared Carne. "I think I'm going to blow my load!"

 _NO!_

It was too late. Sanji could feel the cum as it dripped out of him, soaking his thighs. He felt dirty. He felt used. He felt … he felt like a whore. Like an object. He was hurt, he was in pain and the stink of Carne's cum made him dizzy with illness.

"Have him suck you," said Patty. "Should get you right back up. I'm gonna have a turn at him," he declared with a laugh.

Patty pulled out of Sanji's mouth and switched positions with Carne. Without warning, he forced himself into Sanji.

Sanji felt like he was being split open. He nearly cried out in pain, but Carne was forcing his cock into his mouth so he couldn't utter a sound.

"What would Roronoa say if he could see his bitch now?" demanded Patty, smacking Sanji harshly. "Fuck, I'm not even homo and this is better than any woman I've ever had!" His thrusts were even harsher than Patty's, the sound of flesh against flesh resonating throughout the kitchen, echoing off the walls.

 _Roronoa's bitch? I'm not … THE BASTARDS!_

The realization struck him and if Sanji hadn't felt murderous before, he did now. He couldn't do anything about it, left in such a vulnerable position, but God did he want to hurt them. He was in so much pain, he saw white but the worse thing was a second later when Patty pushed into him even faster and he felt nothing. He was numb. They had fucking numbed him.

"Oh shit, he's bleeding!" came a cry from somewhere.

Patty smacked him harder. "Got fucking blood all over the floor. You gonna clean that up, shit cook?" he demanded, spitting at him. "Fuck, I'm gonna cum!" Patty declared. "Right in your fucking ass! It's okay," Patty said in a voice that sounded far too mocking to ever be sincere, "You can just close your eyes and pretend it's your beloved Roronoa, eh, shit cook?"

Though he couldn't feel anything in his ass anymore, he could feel the mix of cum and blood as it trickled down his thighs.

Patty pulled out harshly and gave him another harsh smack before leading the cooks out and slamming the front door to the Baratie close.

Sanji lay in the middle of the kitchen floor, covered in cum and blood. Finally, he let the tears he denied fall down his cheeks, blurring his vision.

He didn't fucking care anymore.

They had officially taken everything. Everything he ever had, it was gone. His pride, his dignity, and his …

Sanji didn't want to think about that and instead crawled across the floor towards the array of kitchen knives.

So long … it had been so long …

Taking one, he slashed it down harshly against his wrist. The blood mixed with the blood on the floor and Sanji could practically taste it on his tongue. The line was harsh and rash, long going diagonally from his wrist. He hadn't hit a vein, but somewhere in his mind, he wished he had.

Let him bleed out to death. Let him lie here, tangled in the blood, cum and sweat. Let him die here, let him perish here and escape this hell.

The tears fell faster and he gripped the knife tightly, about to make another cut but his vision was too fuzzy and so instead, the knife missed its mark and fell out of his grip, flying across the room instead, hitting the pantry. He sobbed, curling himself into a ball against the cool floor and the cupboard. The tears mixed with the other substances on the floor and he just stayed put, wishing, praying, hoping it would all end.

* * *

The next night, Sanji was serving again.

He had cleaned up the kitchen, been sore all day and had contemplated throwing himself out the top story window. At least that way he would never have to go through such a horrible experience again. But he was still there, still serving, still faking smiles.

When eight thirty came around, he walked to Zoro with a little less of a spring in his step than usual.

An irrational part of his mind told him that it was Zoro's fault. They had kept mentioning him while they were … Sanji couldn't even think about it. Instead, he shivered and got Zoro to his seat, gave him his usual water and went to place his order.

The moment he walked into the kitchen, he was bombarded by the names.

"Slut."

"Whore."

"Bitch."

"Cunt."

"Cocksucker."

He ignored them, but he felt his rage building inside of him. He took a long drag from his cigarette before daring to enter the dinning hall once more. He kept his eyes focused on the customers entirely and didn't allow himself to look elsewhere. He kept eye contract the entire time and forced himself to smile. It was even harder this time around.

No one knew. No one fucking knew so they kept on going on with their lives like they normally would. Which then made Sanji wonder: would anyone care? If anyone knew about what had happened to him the night before, would they care about what had conspired? Would they care that he had been raped on the kitchen floor? Would they care that he had bled? Would they care that blood had been spilt, not only because of them, but because of his own self-inflicted pain? Would they care that Sanji was no longer a pure soul? Would they care—

Sanji stopped himself and gave an answer to all these questions at once.

No.

They wouldn't care.

Because no one cared about Sanji. No one gave a damn whether or not he bled, no one cared whether or not he had been forced to take it up the ass, no one cared if he couldn't hold a knife properly because it still hurt, no one cared if he had scars because all anyone ever cared about was whether or not there was food on their plate.

Everyone could pretend all they wanted, they could put on false faces and act like everything was perfect. It wasn't hard to fake a worried expression. It wasn't hard to pretend that you cared. It wasn't hard to fake a sympathetic glance. It wasn't fucking hard to pretend like someone actually mattered.

 _Because human beings are selfish people,_ Sanji thought. _Human beings only care about themselves. It's all about self-preservation because when it comes down to it, no one fucking cares about anything except whether or not **they're** okay. _

Sanji snapped.

When he approached Zoro with the check in hand, he watched as the green-haired man leafed through his wallet as usual, with a bright smile on his face.

 _He probably doesn't fucking care._

"You know, I won my competition today, cook."

 _Of course._ ** _You_** _won._ ** _Your_** _competition._

"I actually thought I was in serious trouble there though, this guy I was fighting, he was pretty big."

 _Yes._ ** _You_** _thought._ ** _You_** _were in trouble. The guy_ ** _you_** _were fighting. It's all about_ ** _you_** _, isn't it?_

Sanji gritted his teeth. He didn't fucking know. He didn't fucking know the hell Sanji had been through, even though it was his fucking fault. The bastard cooks probably would've left him alone had Zoro not been there. Had Zoro not been a client, had Zoro not fucking existed—

 _CRASH!_

Sanji didn't know what happened.

One moment Zoro was talking about the competition he had won ( _his_ fucking tournament, wasn't it? All about _him_ , was it?), and then Zoro was on the ground, holding his cheek while Sanji stood over him, taking deep breaths. A strand of his hair fell into his eyes and Sanji's foot made contact with the ground.

 _Fuck._

Zoro stared at him with wide eyes. He seemed at a loss for words and was desperately scrambling to form a sentence, but it was too late. Sanji realized what he had done and instantly ran into the kitchen.

The cooks had seen. He left Zoro there, dumbfounded and frozen. They were sneering.

"Lover's quarrel?"

"Now shit cook, you don't bring personal matters into the restaurant."

"Roronoa's gonna tie you up tonight, isn't he? You gonna beg for forgiveness?"

He ignored all of their comments and instead went into the very back room where almost no one went, pressing his back against the door.

Sanji wasn't sure what he had with Zoro. Maybe it had been something bordering on friendship, maybe they had been nothing more than acquaintances, but whatever they had been, it was over now.

 _It's better this way._

Sanji tried to convince himself. This way Zoro wouldn't be disrupting the other customers. This way he didn't have to think of something witty to say in response to one of the swordsman's quips. This way the cooks couldn't give him grief about the Marimo. This way … this way …

This way no one would recognize he was a cook, not a fucking waiter. This way no one would moan in pleasure at the taste of one of his meals. This way no one would give him something to look forward to in his day. This way there'd be no one to call "Marimo".

Sanji pulled his knees towards himself and closed his eyes.

Would anyone care if he drowned in his tears?

* * *

It happened again.

They were rough, they were merciless and instead of only Carne and Patty, three others had joined in. He hadn't cried in front of them, but he had wanted to. He wondered if they'd give him mercy if he showed weakness but he knew the truth. They'd destroy him the moment they saw it.

That night, Sanji collapsed in the kitchen, a knife in hand. He didn't have the strength hold back tears. He didn't have the strength to stand. He didn't have the strength to light another cigarette. He didn't even have the strength to cut.

He wished he did though.

Because everyone cares once you're gone.

Every single fucking one cares.

Just once.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay, for the thank yous!_

 _lilcutieprincess: So the thing was, when I was writing the last chapter, it wasn't that everything was rushed, it was that the writing of it had been rushed, so it makes sense that I had some accidental spelling slip ups and I will definitely look into those strange sentences and such when I do revision. All of my stories go through revision once I'm comfortable with the speed my chapters are coming out and such. Thank you for your opinion on where Sanji learnt his skills, I think your way makes more sense than my way, actually._

 _fanfiction lover 228 : Thank you! I was worried about the last chapter since it felt rushed and all to me, and besides, I want Sanji and Zoro to develop a natural relationship (given their personalities and the situation they're in) because I always like things to be somewhat realistic on some level. _

_a1wonder50 : See, the thing about this story, is that Zeff isn't really there at the restaurant a lot. There's a reason for it, but he hasn't been at the Baratie in like, 6 months. Plus, Sanji thinks if he tells Zeff about what the others are doing, that'll only lead to the cooks hating him more. Zeff tends to go away a lot in this story and isn't often present at the Baratie._

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 5th 2015**


	5. Don't Need A Reason

_**Author's Note:** Hello everyone! Okay so I got this chapter finished earlier than I thought and I'm pretty pleased with it. I'm not sure whose point of view I like most, Sanji's or Zoro's, but anyway, I don't own **One Piece**. To clear up something from the last chapter: Sanji didn't punch Zoro, he hit him in the head with his foot. Zoro states it various times in this chapter. Sorry if I was too vague about that! Any thanks for the reviews are found below. I was so happy that in less than a day, I got 7 reviews for this story! You have no idea how that made my day! Maybe that's why I updated faster. I just really like getting responses to what I write so I know that I did well! Please review, no flames! I love feedback and I would REALLY like to get five reviews for this chapter, if that's possible. This chapter is a lot more tame in comparison to the last one._

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 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

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 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

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 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of self-harm**

 **Abuse**

 **Swearing (don't even ask why I put it there since this happens all the time. I don't even know why I put it here)**

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Chapter 5: Don't Need A Reason

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There had to be a reason.

Zoro had never racked his brain so hard before, had never found a reason worthy enough for him to give him full attention to it, other than his kenjutsu and martial arts, that is. The cook had never caused Zoro's head to spin so much— in fact, _no one_ had ever caused the swordsman's head to spin as much as the blond had.

Zoro knew Sanji. Or at least, he liked to think he knew Sanji.

The blond was not the type to go around kicking people in the head just because he felt like it. Zoro knew Sanji was sour. He wasn't the happiest person and everything he did felt forced, but that was ordinary everyday Sanji. There had to have been something that had made him crack like that. No one just snapped and kicked someone in the head, same way Zoro didn't just pull his swords out on anyone just cause he felt like it.

At eight thirty, Zoro entered the Baratie as usual.

Instead of the blond, cigarette-smoking cook, he was greeted by a big man in a hairnet. The hairnet looked familiar to him. His name-tag read: " _Patty_ ". Was this the person who Zoro had seen hitting Sanji all those nights ago? Why was he out here?

Zoro could understand why Sanji would want to leave the kitchen if people like Patty were there, but why would Patty be out in the dinning hall? He followed the man silently towards his table and sat down, feeling strange.

It just didn't feel right to be served at the Baratie by someone other than Sanji.

"What would you like to drink, sir?"

No Mr. Roronoa. Sanji knew he always ordered water. Sanji knew Zoro's favourite colour was blue. This Patty didn't. When Patty spoke, he had a gruff voice. One that reminded Zoro strongly of an axe-murderer. It wasn't the smooth baritone that Sanji had. There was no smell of nicotine sticking to this man's clothes. There were no golden buttons on his jacket— _blazer_. It was called a blazer— Sanji was really rubbing off on him, wasn't he?

"Um, pardon me sir, but—" _Pardon me?_ Zoro thought to himself. Dear God, he was starting to sound like Sanji! Shaking off the thought, Zoro tried to get his mind off the blond cook— though considering his next question, the idea seemed pointless. "Where's my regular?"

"Your regular?" repeated Patty.

Zoro nodded. "He's blond, curly eyebrows? Wears his hair so that you can only see one of his blue eyes?"

Patty stiffened. "Ah. Him." He frowned. "That waiter—"

"Cook," Zoro corrected him before he could stop himself.

Patty's frown deepened. "Zoro Roronoa, correct?"

Zoro stared at him. How did this man know his name? Then again, he was all over the newspapers with his recent win. "Yes," he said slowly, cautiously.

"Well, that cook of yours is currently occupied with more pressing issues."

Zoro felt a strong feeling of distrust towards the man. He abused Sanji, Zoro knew that. So why was he serving him? Sanji had something to run from, a reason to be in the dinning hall. Why was Patty here instead of Sanji?

Zoro bit his bottom lip. "I'll have water," he told him, but he felt sick just speaking to a waiter who wasn't Sanji. It was strange. In the many nights he had gone to the Baratie, he had never spoken to anyone other than Sanji. It felt weird, out of place and he didn't like it.

Patty gave him a big, phoney smile and nodded. "Right away sir!"

His smile made Zoro's stomach churn. Sanji was … in comparison to this man, Sanji was a thousand times better. It didn't take a genius to figure it out. While Sanji had a polite, reservedness to him, this man was boisterous and fake. Everything this man did was easily for show, but while Sanji was fake, from his smile to his laugh, he threw in a genuine quip or some kind of _something_ that made him different. Sanji was the only cook who acted this way and Zoro knew that and he wanted it back.

He wanted to hear the strange "pardon" that never failed to come out of Sanji's mouth. He wanted to hear "Mr. Roronoa". He wanted to be ridiculed for thinking about "magic ice cubes". He wanted Sanji to tsk while he took the few bills he had left out of his wallet.

Sanji knew his way of paying, their method they had figured out. This man didn't.

After Zoro ordered his meal, he knew instantly that this wasn't going to end well.

The restaurant had a more tense atmosphere than he'd rather admit and he couldn't help but watch this Patty's every move as he walked around the dinning hall.

He was nothing like Sanji, a fact that Zoro couldn't easily forget.

Sanji would tease him about the menu. Pretend to be overly polite, act as though the restaurant were even more high-class than it already was. He had small habits Zoro had learnt to pick up on. The way he'd use a cigarette only to half of its full extent before switching to a new one. The way Sanji chewed on the tip of the cigar in thought … Zoro had never liked the smell of nicotine but now that it was gone, it felt strange.

Being waited on by Patty was not nearly as pleasant as being waited on by Sanji.

Patty moved like a drunk elephant on roller skates in a skating rink. Each step he took was loud and there was no grace behind it. Sanji had a finesse to his movements. Though they were calculated, they looked natural and he seemed to walk on air. This man suffocated the very oxygen Zoro breathed.

Once his check came, Zoro knew he had a problem. This couldn't end well. Only he and Sanji knew about the arrangement of payment. Since Sanji didn't want Zoro talking about his injuries and the like to others, it was no doubt that he had never discussed Zoro's way of payment with anyone.

"The check, sir," said Patty, handing it over.

Zoro winced, looking down at the bill.

150 00 yen.

 _Fuck, that's a lot!_

"Um, sir," Zoro said slowly, trying to find the right words to speak. "The thing is, there's a bit of a … complication, I suppose I could call it, about my payment." He knew that the abuse Sanji suffered was something that was not to be brought up to the one who abused him, at least not in a restaurant because Zoro had the strong feeling that he would rush back to his car, grab his swords and never be allowed to enter the Baratie again and he needed to be able to. He needed to, or else he couldn't watch over Sanji, the ungrateful bastard. How did he bring up his lack of money to the man without telling him about their deal?

"Complication?" repeated Patty. It was clear that he didn't like that word. "What's complicated about it?"

"You see, my regular and I had a … an _arrangement_ and since I didn't know he wouldn't be here, I didn't exactly come prepared, per se."

Patty got red in the face, his fists clenching. They were large and meaty and Zoro wondered if Sanji was ever struck by Patty's bare hands, which would probably hurt enough to cause his entire body to shatter.

"An arrangement?" Patty had an evil look in his eye. "Oh, I understand. Well, there's nothing I can do about that, is there?" He tapped his chin thoughtfully in a way that looked far too menacing to be legal. "How about you give me what you usually give him and we'll call it fair?"

Zoro didn't feel comfortable handing over the contents of his wallet to this man. He had about 135 00 yen, so he'd be short by about 15 00 yen. It wasn't the worst amount he had ever paid, he always came up short by at least 20 00 yen, so this was a new record but still, he got the feeling the man wouldn't take kindly to being underpaid. Patty reminded Zoro of the kind of people who would ransack the cash register once the boss was gone and then proceed to bathe in their not-so-well-deserved earnings.

Hesitantly, Zoro began to empty out his wallet, not looking at the man. He didn't want to know what Patty's opinion of him was— the nearly broke swordsman spending all of his cash on a meal that hadn't tasted nearly as good as it did when Sanji was around— and he left his money on the table before getting up and putting on his jacket.

"Where's the restroom?" he asked Patty, looking around the restaurant for a way to the kitchen that didn't look so suspicious. He knew Sanji had to be here, he didn't seem like the kind of person who got days off, and if he truly was a cook, then surely he'd be in the kitchen, right?

Patty sneered at him. "Over there, sir. Pleasure doing business with you."

Zoro saw the look in his eye, despite trying to avoid it.

Patty looked pleased at all the money he had spent.

Zoro nodded and headed in the general direction of the bathroom before making a sharp turn to the right and pressing himself against the kitchen doors. He could hear the loud noises of the clashing pots and pans, but he kept quiet. Last time he had come around here, Sanji had been being abused. What would he find this time?

Slowly, he pushed against the doors and the sounds of the kitchen amplified before going quiet.

"Is that—?"

"I think so."

"Heh, Roronoa was dissatisfied?"

Zoro didn't know how these people knew about him or his relation to Sanji, but he blocked them out and instead headed towards a short looking man who seemed to be snickering in joy. "You," he said, pointing at him.

"Me?"

"Yes, you, the cook with the dumb expression on your face," Zoro clarified, but now that he thought about it, everyone in the kitchen looked dumb to him. "Where's the assistant cook?"

The cook leered, his lip curling. "Oi! He wants to know where Shit Cook is!"

"Tell him Carne," one of the other cooks said, "the bastard could use a little breaking in, eh?"

The cook, whose name Zoro figured was Carne, turned to him. "Alright, I'll tell you where your little shit cook is. But let me tell you this first: he ain't as tight as he was before." Carne let out a loud laugh that sent chills down Zoro's spine. He slapped Zoro on the back, before saying, "he's in the backroom," and pushing the swordsman forwards towards what Zoro could only guess was the backroom.

The room had to be for inventory, or at least, it was a very unoccupied room. It didn't take Zoro long to find the blond seeing as he was the only one in the entire area. Around him were large bags of potatoes and other fruits and vegetables, along with flour, sugar and salt. Various other ingredients were around the room in an organized mess.

Zoro could faintly hear the sound of a knife on wood, the chopping of something on a wooden board, probably.

Standing in the dimmest area of the room, he realized Sanji didn't know he was there. He watched the cook's back as his shoulders moved, the rapid sound of the knife on the cutting board echoing through the silent room. This had to be the first time Zoro had ever seen Sanji cook. It was … Zoro couldn't find words for it, but he found that Sanji looked better cooking than any pretty lady on those dumb cooking shows and Zoro could only see Sanji's back!

The chopping stopped and the sound of things being moved met Zoro's ears. Then the ingredients were being put into a giant pot and it was being stirred. He could hear the soup as it bubbled.

Zoro tried to think of what to say to make his presence known. As amazing as it was to watch Sanji cook, he knew he had to let the blond know he was there, but he couldn't find words. For some reason, they were stuck in his throat as the cook moved around the miniature kitchen with ease, as though this were his battlefield the way the ring was Zoro's.

How could he ruin this picturesque moment for Sanji? He could tell from Sanji's posture he was tired. He probably hadn't slept in a few days, or at least, hadn't slept well. Zoro wanted to clear his throat, maybe start off the conversation with a joke, but his wit left him as Sanji continued to stir the soup in silence.

Then—

"Why are you here?"

Immediately, Zoro jumped, surprised. His back hit the wall and some flour which had been on the shelf above him fell, spilling onto the floor. He heard a sigh from Sanji's direction while Zoro tried to stand up, but was too busy coughing, never mind trying to see through the cloud of flour, to be able to.

"Marimo, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

Zoro felt a hand grasp his and could only comply as Sanji lent him a hand and helped him stand up. It was only for an instant, but Zoro thought he could see faint white lines across Sanji's arm when the sleeve of Sanji's blazer rolled up.

Sanji stared at the spilled flour with a frown. "Such a waste," he muttered under his breath. Then he turned to Zoro. "Is there any reason in particular you're here?"

Zoro wanted to ask Sanji so many things. How had he known Zoro was there? Why hadn't he been in the dinning hall? Was Patty and that Carne person forcing him to stay here? When was the last time he had gotten a full-night's sleep? Was he okay? What had been up with him last night? Why had he kicked him? What was his reasoning? Were things at the Baratie becoming worse? Was Zoro causing problems for him, accidentally? Why had the cooks known about him? What had Carne meant by "tight"? And the biggest question ringing in his mind: _what the fuck was going on?_

Instead of saying any of these things, he looked Sanji dead-straight in the eye and said, "I'm a valued customer."

Sanji let out a hollow laugh. "How could I forget? My memory must be getting bad."

Zoro shook his head, trying to untie his tongue. "No wait, that's not what I meant. I swear, there's a reason I'm here."

Sanji raised an eyebrow as though to challenge his words.

"It's just … I'm here cause … I mean …"

 _Fuck, Zoro, it's words, it's not that damn hard!_

"What are you making?" he asked instead, wanting to hit himself. This was like asking Sanji about himself all over again. He had a vague idea of what he wanted to say but when he opened his mouth, all the wrong words came out. Fuck, since when was talking so hard?

"Soup," Sanji replied casually.

"Your famous soup?" Zoro asked.

"And if it is?"

This was going nowhere. "Look, why weren't you in the dinning hall?" Zoro asked. When he tried small talk, he failed and when he got to his point, he sounded like some kind of killer, demanding answers from his hostage. Since when was he so fucked up?

"Didn't feel like it," Sanji said, turning away from Zoro and going instead to the pot of soup. He continued stirring it, though Zoro got the strong feeling the stirring was no longer necessary. Especially since the stove had been turned off as of when Zoro fell.

"Don't give me that," Zoro said. "Don't fucking lie to me."

Sanji stared at him with an icy blue eye. "I'm not lying."

Zoro wanted to grab his swords and demand an answer from the blond, but he knew under pressure the cook was probably even less likely to answer him. He couldn't solve every problem using violence, no matter how infuriating Sanji was. What had that kick been? Zoro's brain was still rattling in his skull from it. Where had Sanji learnt to do that?

Zoro met his gaze fiercely and decided that unless he got a firm and concrete answer, he refused to move. "Tell me, why weren't you in the dinning hall? What's going on?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip and turned his head away.

"Look at me!"

Sanji flinched, backing away from him.

Zoro's stomach dropped out from him, feeling as though a bucket of cold ice had just been dumped on him. Had he just raised his voice? The way Sanji was backing towards the hot stove, his fingers dangerously close to touching it, made him freeze. Did Sanji prefer being burnt than talking to him?

Zoro shook his head. He had to do this right. He had no idea how to act around Sanji at the moment. To treat him like a wounded animal would be an insult to his pride, obviously, but to say things carelessly as he just did would help him make no further progress than if he treated Sanji like an ordinary person he met on the street. Sanji wasn't just some stranger, he was someone whom Zoro had come to care for, in his own, strange way. He cared for Sanji as much as a swordsman can care for a cook whom they blackmailed— probably a bit more than that, now that he thought about it.

"I'm sorry," Zoro said. "I just … my friends say I have some anger issues. Look, I don't want to hurt you, I just want to talk—"

"Because you're clearly doing so well with that," Sanji snapped.

Zoro hated to admit it, but the blond had a point. "Let me start over then, okay? I just want—"

"Why do you care?"

Zoro stared at Sanji, open-mouthed.

The look in the cook's eye was … Zoro couldn't describe it other than it felt like looking at a cracked glass. No, more like bruised glass. An ice rink after plenty of hockey players had skated across it, the blades each leaving jagged lines, firm and smooth, but rough and harsh at the same time. Like a zamboni was gliding across the rink in an attempt to repair it and relieve all of those faint scars to make the rink anew, and it broke down half-way through the job. Like the world wouldn't let the ice start fresh, like the ice didn't _want_ to start over.

Faint white scars …

Zoro grabbed Sanji's arm. His grip was tight enough so that Sanji couldn't escape, but he made sure his hands weren't too rough when he pulled Sanji's left arm towards him. Pulling up the cook's sleeves, he stared at what he saw.

An assortment of jagged lines, white and faint— but no. There was a nasty red one that was longer, sharper and more recent.

"What the fuck?" Zoro demanded, letting go of Sanji's arm.

Sanji turned away from him and pulled down his sleeve harshly, so much so that the shirt was tilted and threatened to fall off his left shoulder. The extra fabric was fisted in his hand and his eyes were downcast. "It's nothing."

"It's not fucking nothing," Zoro said. "Are you …" Zoro lost his voice, staring at Sanji. His throat was dry and he couldn't seem to muster up words, couldn't find the strength to do it. "Did you do this to yourself?"

Sanji lifted his head up towards the ceiling, avoiding Zoro's eyes. He seemed to be counting the cracks in the ceiling tiles and Zoro felt as though he might die, having an idea of Sanji's answer.

"And if I did?"

Zoro shut his eyes tightly to stop himself from doing something rash. He took a few deep breaths, trying to cool himself down. How could Sanji …? Was life so meaningless to him? "What does your life mean to you?" Zoro asked him finally, opening his eyes. "If that cut had been just a tad deeper …" Zoro trailed off, not wanting to think about it.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Like that matters—"

"It does so fucking matter!" Zoro told him.

Sanji backed away from him when Zoro's voice raised, but Zoro took his arm before he could get very far. He made sure his grip was light and he wondered what kind of pain Sanji had suffered to help pull him off the floor. Zoro ran his other hand through his hair and took another deep breath.

"Fuck, Sanji you can't just … what?"

The cook was looking at him strangely, as though he had dropped out of space.

"You …" Sanji licked his lips dryly and Zoro's eyes followed his tongue as it moved across those cracked lips. Each move seemed deliberate and slow, as though it was trying to drive him insane but he knew the cook couldn't possibly know what he was doing. Hell, Zoro didn't even know what was happening. "You said my name."

He had?

Zoro thought back and realized that the cook was right. He had called him Sanji.

"So?" Zoro asked curiously. He had been pressing the cook for over a month to call him by his first name, what was the big deal in Zoro calling him by his?

"You've … you've never done that before," Sanji said, sounded dumbstruck, as though he was still in shock.

Again, the cook was right. Funny. If Zoro had been pressing Sanji to call him by his first name, shouldn't he have been calling Sanji by his first name to encourage a first-name basis?

Oh well. What was done was done. There was nothing Zoro could do about it.

"SHIT COOK!"

Sanji's eyes widened. "You have to go," he told Zoro.

"What? No! I'm just starting to make a break through here—"

"No, you have to go," Sanji insisted. He began to push at Zoro's back, trying to get him to move but the swordsman stood still. He wouldn't move so easily. Years of being in the fighting ring had taught him the proper stance that allowed him to keep his footing and he'd be damned if some cook was the one who made him lose his concentration.

"We still need to talk," Zoro insisted, "there are so many things you still haven't told me and—"

"That can wait for later," Sanji told him, "right now you _have to go_!"

"It can't wait till later," Zoro said, "later you won't want to talk to me like this and I'll have to start all over! I'm not moving—"

"Zoro."

Immediately, Zoro froze. His concentration slipped at the sound of his first name coming from the lips of the cook. He stared at him, dumbstruck himself.

"Zoro, _please_."

Zoro didn't even acknowledge that he was being pushed out the door until he was back in the main kitchen and the loud sounds of cooking met his ears. He could see the large man, Patty, walking in through the large swinging doors and immediately, he crouched himself low, trying to hide in a corner. There was something more going on here, something Sanji wasn't telling him and he had to find out. If this Patty person realized he was in the kitchen, Zoro got the strong feeling he'd be forced out so he had to stay hidden until he saw Patty enter through the doors to the backroom.

Zoro rushed to the backroom and kept his ear pressed against it. He wasn't supposed to eavesdrop, that much was obvious and he didn't want to know what his friends would think if they knew he was doing this, after all, he was usually the one telling them to stop being idiots, but Sanji had him doing all kinds of strange things he had never imagined himself doing.

"—on the floor?!"

That was Patty, there was no denying that nauseating voice.

"Sorry."

That was Sanji. He sounded defiant, sarcastic. That was the Sanji Zoro knew.

"What'd you fucking say?" demanded Patty. "Are you mocking me?"

"No." This time Sanji sounded solemn.

"So I'll ask you again, who spilt the fucking flour?"

Zoro's blood froze. Was Sanji going to get in trouble over something that was Zoro's fault? He wasn't sure he could stomach that.

"Take a guess," came Sanji's response.

"I guess it was the shit cook!" Patty spat.

There was silence.

"Don't roll your eyes at me! Know your fucking place. What, you think it could've been someone else? Has anyone else been back here?"

Silence.

And then—

"No."

"So?" pressed Patty.

"I did it."

"Exactly."

 _SMACK!_

Zoro flinched at the mere sound. He heard a slight whimper which was stopped half-way through, probably Sanji biting his lip to keep himself quiet.

"You know who I served today?"

Silence.

"I'll tell you who. It was that fucking Roronoa. The bastard though he could pay me and I wouldn't notice the 15 00 yen he was missing! He said you had an arrangement. You give him a good blowjob as long as he gives you all of his money? Is that your 'arrangement'? Is that how it works, you fucking slut?"

Sanji said nothing but Zoro felt sick.

The cooks, they thought …

Suddenly, what Carne said made more sense to him.

 _He ain't as tight as he was before._

Which meant … No. No, no, _nononono_!

Zoro felt his stomach churn. Sanji wasn't the type of guy who— but that only made the facts worse. If Sanji wasn't the type of guy to go around sleeping, then that would mean that they had …

 _BANG!_

Against his will, Zoro's hands moved without his consent. They fisted and slammed against the backroom door, harshly. His knuckles got splinters and he could fell the smallest trace of blood trickle down his fingers. This couldn't be happening. Sanji's attitude the night before made sense now. The pain, God the pain Sanji had been through … and that look on his face when Zoro had tried to start over—

 _"Why do you care?"_

The way he had said it had made Zoro feel cold all over. It was as though Sanji had thrown words at him that Zoro hadn't been expecting, as though Sanji had intended to cut him without a knife. Why did Zoro care? _Why did he care?_ He fucking cared because— fuck, he couldn't think of a reason.

 _Fuck that, I don't need a fucking reason._

The damn bastard clearly wasn't going to help himself out of this mess, despite the fact that it looked like he was living in hell. If the idiotic cook wasn't going to save himself, then Zoro was going to do it for him and he wasn't going to take no for an answer.

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 _ **Author's Note #2:** Now for the thank-yous!_

 _Guest : I always try to make my readers feel something with my words, so I'm pretty happy that I conveyed Sanji's emotions well. I mean, sorry that it was depressing, but I guess I'm happy that using words alone I was able to make someone feel something. Thank you for your review!_

 _lilcutieprincess: I hope the way that Zoro found out was satisfying for you, and thank you for reviewing! And, just to reiterate, Sanji didn't punch Zoro, he kicked him._

 _Guest #2: Am I just skilled at making others depressed? I don't know, I pride myself in being able to write different genres, able to write humour as well as I can write angst and with a story like this, you can't really expect there NOT to be angst. I hope though that my dashes of humour keep you entertained._

 _a1wonder50 : I know this kinda sucks, but uh, everyone cook in the kitchen is into the idea of abusing Sanji. Yeah, they're all bastards._

 _S.P. Tripathi: Hey old friend! So I AM working on that story for you, but because I have so much of this story planned out (like, 26 chapters), I figured I'd work on this a little. Anyway, I was wondering, do you even know the animes that these are based of off? Because it seems to me as though you read everything I write (NOT THAT THAT'S A BAD THING!), regardless of whether or not you know the fandom. It's just that knowing the fandom helps a little in certain times of context. I've never written a scene like that one before so though I'm sorry everyone seemed to feel incredibly depressed by it, I'm glad that it got everyone to feel the emotions I was trying to convey. _

_Vicky : Well, Zoro noticed so I guess that means points to him, huh? Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : I'm really happy you liked it! Or at least, that you find it worth reading on with. I've always liked the idea of helping fix something that's broken and from the way the cooks pretended to treat Sanji during the Baratie arc, it just set him up as being the victim, though I think Zoro would make an interesting person if he acted like a kicked puppy. I hope this chapter pleased you!_

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 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	6. A Much Needed Kidnapping

_**Author's Note** : Up until this point, all of the original chapter titles of this story have changed by the time they were updated with the exception of this one and chapter 1. Chapter 2 was going to be called **Making A Deal With The Devil,** chapter 3 was some other name I can't even remember, and chapter 4 went through so much hell. It was between **Throwing In The Towel, A Long Time Coming, Cracking** , and then when it was finally done, I realized how many times Sanji was wondering if anyone would care and so yeah, that became the title. Chapter 5 was supposed to be called **Prideful Resistance** , but because of the way it turned out, the name was dropped. This chapter also turned out differently than I expected. Originally, a scene in which Sanji actually learnt how the kidnapping happen was present, but then it was cut. It'll turn up some time later. I know this chapter is really different from the other ones, but it was a lot of fun to write and I know it's weird and maybe Sanji- never mind, Sanji SHOULD be more concerned about it, but I dunno, I liked the way this chapter flowed. I'm actually really nervous about the reaction to this story. There was originally a scene in here that's also missing and was moved to a new chapter. Anyway, I hope you guys like it! No flames, please review! I don't own **One Piece** and can anyone guess where Zoro's rant about himself came from? (Here's a hint, it's from a yaoi anime/manga.) Thanks for reviews are below. I updated faster cause I REALLY wanted to get this chapter up cause I really wanted to know others reaction. It's shorter than the others, but you know, the length of these chapters fluctuate._

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 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

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 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt to tip the man goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

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Chapter 6: A Much Needed Kidnapping

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Sanji opened his eyes blearily. There was too much light. It was too sunny.

Diving under the covers, he shielded his face with a warm blanket when he realized something.

It was sunny. There were covers and a blanket.

What the fuck was going on?

Sanji sat bolt up in bed— a fucking bed, why the fuck was he a bed?— and looked around him.

He didn't recognize his surroundings. He was on a large, king-sized bed covered in green sheets. The room had dark colours, different shades of grey and the pillows had green pillowcases. He couldn't wrap his mind around it and instead bit his lip, trying to remember. It was then that he realized he didn't have a cigarette in his mouth either.

 _Okay, think Sanji, think. Where the fuck are you?_

Using his five senses, he slowly tried to piece together the mystery.

Sight. Okay. As far as he could see, he was in a bedroom with a large bed. The sheets had probably been recently cleaned and the room had dull colours, a colour scheme of green and different shades of grey. There was sun coming in from the window, the curtains drawn back. His blazer was laying over the back of a desk chair which was on to the side of the room. Suddenly in a panic, Sanji lifted the sheets and checked himself over. Other than his blazer and his shoes, he was wearing exactly what he remembered wearing before his memory seemed to have abandoned him. Directly across from him was a long full-length mirror. Immediately, Sanji averted his gaze from it. What else was in the room? Nothing else that seemed worth mentioning.

Scent. He could smell the fresh detergent of the sheets and steel and pine trees, something that reminded him of mint. Mint. Green. Sanji's mind was too tired to make the connection. The faint smell of steam also reached him as well as something nauseating, drafting in from some unknown location.

Taste. No. He was _not_ eating anything in the room.

Touch. The sheets felt warm, the pillows fluffy but not _too_ fluffy. Just right. Oh God, was he fucking Goldilocks now? He didn't think any of his limbs felt sore, nor did they feel like they were in pain.

Sound. He could hear the boiling of something, what he didn't know. There was a quiet moving of feet on the ground, the chirping of birds— it seemed too serene to be real. Clearly he was hallucinating, wasn't he? But then—

"FUCK!"

Was that …?

Sanji felt stupid. Green. Fucking green was around him and he couldn't figure it out? The smell of steel, pine and mint. God, was he fucking retarded? Sanji pulled himself out of the bed, suddenly feeling rather cold. The wooden floorboards were fucking freezing on his feet and with slightly unsteady balance from laying down for too long, Sanji began to stumble his way towards the smell of the steam.

He entered a kitchen where Zoro Roronoa was standing in front of the stove, something boiling in a pot. That's where that horrendous stench was coming from.

"Roronoa," Sanji growled.

Zoro turned around and Sanji couldn't help it. He had to stifle a laugh. Despite the situation in which he was certain he had been abducted, there was Zoro with an apron around his waist, holding a large wooden spoon in one hand, a firm expression on his face. He was glaring at the pot from the corner of his mouth. He had probably burnt himself on the stove. _Amateur_. Zoro placed both of his hands on his hips and Sanji nearly died of laughter, but he held it in and instead bit his lip to stop himself from laughing. Finally, when he was sure he wouldn't laugh and destroy the Marimo's pride (though the bastard fucking deserved it, what was this, invasion of the body snatchers?), he said, "What the fuck are you doing?"

Zoro said nothing. Instead, he turned back around to the pot of evil and continued to stir. Then, he pulled the spoon out of the pot and showed it to Sanji.

It looked like gunk. It looked like someone had put their boogers in muddy rain water and shook it and stirred it before deciding it looked too dreadful to be presentable and threw it into the trash. And then decided at the last minute that they had nothing else to serve.

"What is _that_?" asked Sanji, pointing towards the food imposture.

"Soup," said Zoro. "You should know, shouldn't you, Curly Brow?"

Sanji raised said curly brow. "In what country does that shit pass as food?"

Zoro gritted his teeth, obviously displeased with the cook's reaction to the food. "Eat it," he insisted with a growl.

Sanji shook his head. "No fucking way."

Zoro sighed frustratedly. "Look, won't you just eat the fucking soup? It's not going to kill you!"

"Are you sure? Because that looks like the kind of stuff that causes quarantines— _OMPH_!"

It was dreadful.

They say that 90% of what you smell is what you taste. Sanji wished he had been born without a nose. He could try to describe the dreadful concoction that was probably some kind of secret military stink bomb, or some poison that was yet to be tested by humans, but he'd rather not. With absolutely no chance to block his nose, the full taste and smell of so called "soup" hit him full force, leaving Sanji desperately wishing he had been born without half of his senses. It felt weird on his tongue, kind of like what he imagined leather would taste like. And corduroy. There was a problem when food started tasting like textiles.

Sanji's immediate knee-jerk reaction was to run to the sink and spit out the foul so-called "food", but judging by the look on Zoro's face as he waited for Sanji's reaction, he knew he couldn't do that to him. Even if Zoro _was_ his kidnapper. He closed his eyes and braced himself before forcing the lump down his throat, trying not to wince as he did.

Zoro watched him.

Sanji swallowed, regretting it instantly. He was certain he'd be retching it up later. Or now, if he thought about it too much. Zoro continued to stare at him so Sanji steadied himself, bracing one hand on the counter and tried to give him a smile. It was one of the most forced smiles Sanji had ever given and that was saying something. He gave Zoro a thumbs-up sign and the green-haired man just shook his head.

"You can spit it out," Zoro told him. "I won't be offended."

 _Oh really? Cause you looked like you were really awaiting praise._

Sanji shook his head. "Can't." His voice sounded weird to his own ears. Had that goop done something to his vocal chords?

"What, do you mean you can't? Did it get stuck in your throat?"

Sanji shook his head again. "I swallowed it."

Zoro raised an eyebrow. "You swallowed it?"

Sanji nodded, thumping at his chest with a closed fist. "Yeah."

 _"You fucking swallowed it?"_ Zoro repeated, flabbergasted.

Sanji sighed. "Do I really have to repeat myself?" He felt wobbly on his feet and gripped the counter harder. "And it's been decided. You're not allowed in the kitchen ever again. It's lethal."

Zoro crossed his arms. "You know, you didn't _have_ to eat it."

"You _shoved it down my throat_!"

"Well you didn't have to swallow it!"

"Of course I had to fucking swallow it, you damn marimo, or would you have liked my puke all over your walls?"

Zoro stared at him. He blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. And then he started laughing.

Zoro's entire body shook, one hand on his stomach, the other on the counter for support. The swordsman, for a reason Sanji couldn't fathom, thought this was fucking hilarious. Zoro shook his head as his laughter poured out of him and Sanji had to admit it was refreshing.

To hear laughter that wasn't of ridicule or malicious intent was rare for Sanji. He wasn't sure when the last time he had heard such a genuine laugh was. Zoro laughed with complete abandon. He didn't hold in anything from the large gasps of air he took to the snort that found its way out of his nose on the occasion.

Sanji waited, a part of him wishing he could join in but scared he had forgotten how to. When was the last time Sanji had laughed that freely? As though he had no cares in the world?

"You done?"

Zoro held up a finger, holding his stomach tightly. "Give me a second."

Sanji waited.

Finally, Zoro stood upright and with a few deep breaths, seemed totally fine once more. His breathing returned to normal, but he was wiping away tears of laughter. When was the last time Sanji had cried for a reason other than pain? _No_ , he told himself firmly, _going down that train of thought will only lead to more problems._

"Okay, now that you aren't going to die from lack of oxygen," Sanji said, unable to hide his amusement, "let's get back to the matter at hand, shall we? Why the hell did you fucking abduct me?"

Zoro shook his head. "I didn't _abduct_ you, I was _saving_ you."

"This is kidnapping!" Sanji retorted. "Shit, the other cooks, they're going to kill me! Fuck—" Sanji couldn't hold in the shiver at the thought of what awaited him when he returned to the Baratie. Patty and Carne had found a new way to break him down and keep his entire body sore, a way that the other cooks seemed to enjoy far too much.

"Hey, cook," Zoro said, grabbing Sanji's shoulders, stopping the cook from shaking. Sanji hadn't even noticed until he stopped and flinched from Zoro's touch. Zoro took a moment to breathe and — was that hurt in his eyes? "Listen to me. Yes, technically, I did take you from your work without your complete consent—"

"You know, this is considered illegal, right?"

"Oh please," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "As if you wouldn't have run away at some point or another. I'm just giving you a head start." Zoro rubbed his arm sheepishly before taking a deep breath and starting over. It was almost funny how the swordsman struggled for the right words. "Look, if you stayed at the Baratie any longer, you'd have gotten yourself killed. Either by those cooks or by your own hands and I don't like the thought of you offing yourself."

"You'd be the only one," Sanji muttered to himself.

Zoro stared at him. "I was meaning to ask, but don't you have any family? Surely your parents know the shit you've been through—"

"They're dead."

"W-what?"

Sanji took a deep breath and sighed. "They're dead," he repeated. "Where'd you put my cigarettes, you marimo bastard?" Sanji asked, changing the subject immediately.

It seemed that Zoro wouldn't be so easily distracted though. "Before I help you give yourself lung cancer, I was wondering if you could tell me—"

"How they died?" Sanji cut him off. "Give me my cigarettes and I might tell you."

Zoro sighed but he left the room and came back with Sanji's blazer. Throwing it to him, Zoro leaned against the kitchen counter, waiting.

It appeared as though Zoro hadn't touched Sanji's pack. There were still the same amount of cigars as there had been before and his lighter was still in his pocket. Sanji took a cigarette out of the pack and lit it up, taking a deep inhalation. His cloudy state of mind beginning to dissipate. "What made you think you could cook, eh, Marimo?" asked Sanji once he felt more grounded.

Zoro looked the other way and Sanji vaguely remembered how Zoro still had a discomfort around smoke. Oh well. The man had abducted him, he'd have to pay the consequences of having a smoker in his house. "I asked you a question first."

Sanji shook his head and sighed. "I don't see how my parents' death is any of your fucking business."

Zoro gave Sanji a sideways glance. "Did I bring back bad memories?" he asked, looking oddly sympathetic.

"Nah, it's been ages," Sanji told him with a shrug. "It doesn't really bother me to talk about it, but you know, it seems like you're determined to find out everything about me all in one go."

Zoro shrugged. "You're … interesting."

"Glad to know I'm entertaining."

"That's not what I said—"

"Interesting and entertaining practically mean the same thing in my book," Sanji said. "Don't worry though," he added, "you're plenty entertaining to me too."

Zoro looked taken aback for a moment and turned his head away once more. Was that … a blush?

Sanji nearly let out a laugh, if he remembered how. Flicking the remains of his cigarette down the drain, he took out another one. "So, how about you explain to me how this happened?"

"Huh?"

"Don't give me that," Sanji said. "Obviously you kidnapped me against my will, but how'd you do it?"

Zoro stared at him sideways, tilting his head. "You don't remember?"

"Nope," Sanji replied, popping the p. He took a long drag of his cigarette before speaking again. "It's like I've got amnesia or something. My head hurts. Did you force vodka down my throat or something else besides that terrifying slop?"

Zoro frowned. "You don't have to be so cruel towards my cooking, I've never had to cook for anyone but myself—"

"Thank God for that."

Zoro's eyes narrowed. "So what does it matter if I can't cook sashimi like you can?"

"I never said it mattered. You're so touchy, Marimo."

"I am _not_ touchy!"

"Hmm, that sounded a tad touchy, didn't it?"

"It did not!"

"Are you sure? I could record it and play it back for you."

"Argh, you're insufferable."

"If I'm so insufferable, why'd you bother?"

Sanji knew he shouldn't have brought it up. Though he desperately wanted to know how he ended up in the swordsman's apartment, he had been having the first normal conversation he had had in God knew how long but of course, he had to bring it up because otherwise it might drive him insane at night, wondering about whether or not Zoro was going to take his shinai to kill him in his sleep. Turning up to a tournament with a bloody sword would be hard to explain though.

"Because," Zoro said slowly, as though by saying his words slowly, his reasoning would come to him. "I …" He turned away from Sanji and ran a hand through his moss hair before throwing his hands up in the air. "I did it cause I fucking could, okay?"

"Actually, considering the legal-ness of your actions, I beg to differ."

Zoro growled and turned to Sanji. "I did it cause I fucking wanted to, is that what you want to hear?"

Sanji frowned. "But why would you want to?"

"Could you go five minutes without asking me a question?" Zoro demanded.

"Is it really the questions you don't like, or the answers that you don't have?" Sanji shot back. Zoro just stood there, his mouth opening and closing like a gaping fish. Sanji nodded and put on his blazer. "As much fun as this has been, I have a job, which I have to get back to, so if you don't mind— _HERK_!"

Sanji was pulled back by the collar of his blazer and smashed into Zoro, who stood firm, the only way a swordsman could. Sanji was pressed up against Zoro's chest. Looking up at him, he noticed that the Marimo had dark grey eyes with the lightest flecks of hazel in them. It was a peculiar colour that Sanji had never seen elsewhere.

Zoro took a hold of Sanji's arm, his grip firmer than Sanji remembered and instantly, he recoiled from the taller man. He sprang away as fast as he could, his back hitting the other counter, his legs feeling weak. The memories that haunted him were back again and Zoro had already proven he wasn't the most gentle person, if it wasn't obvious from his choice of career in kenjustu and martial arts. Zoro stared at him in confusion, obviously not understanding why he had reacted the way he did.

Sanji held out a hand to stop Zoro from coming closer. "Just ... stay there," he told him, trying to find his voice. He shouldn't be freaking out. He knew Zoro wasn't the bad guy. He had done nothing wrong but Sanji got the feeling that any touch from anyone, no matter how kind (though Zoro had a strange way of showing it) would make him feel repulsed, insignificant and want to curl up in a ball in the corner and bleed out. _Happy thoughts, happy thoughts,_ he told himself, but with the memory brought to the forefront of his mind, Sanji couldn't make himself think of better times, if they even existed.

"Sorry," Zoro apologized after a few minutes of silence had passed between the two. "It's just … I don't want you working there. At least, not for a while."

"Pardon?"

Zoro chuckled, as though this were something funny. "You're overly polite, did you know?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Can you get to the fucking point already? Why can't I go back to my job? Not all of us can be fucking kendo champions and make money!"

"And yet you have the mouth of a sailor."

Sanji was starting to get really irritated with the green-haired man and he demonstrated his impatience by tapping his foot on the floor with aggravation.

"I think it's best for the sake of your health and sanity that you stay with me for a while," Zoro said.

"Stay with my fucking captor?" Sanji said incredulously. "Should I fear Stockholm syndrome?"

Zoro shook his head. "It's not a good environment, the Baratie, and I don't want you to get anymore fucked up than you already are."

"Oh gee, thanks."

"You know what I mean."

"What makes you think you're any better than the cooks at the Baratie?" Sanji snapped, sending him a glare. "I know close to nothing about you. You're a fucking enigma. You compete in kendo, you like meditation and apparently, enjoy having three piercings in your ear, but are strictly against smoking. I know your whole life story," he said sarcastically. "It's like staying with a complete stranger!"

"Okay," Zoro said. "Fair enough." He took a step closer to Sanji, enough to make the blond back up into the counter even further on instinct, but he was still far enough away that if Sanji tried to run, Zoro would have a little trouble keeping up with him. "My name's Zoro Roronoa. I'm twenty-two, soon to be twenty-three in about three months. My blood type is XF, I'm left-handed, my star sign is Scorpio, I had never tired sushi until I went to the Baratie. I practice Santoryu, I've stayed sober for almost two months now thanks to the Baratie and their fucking expensive drinks, my natural hair colour is green— don't pretend you weren't curious about it— and I have a slight scar on my cheek due to being kicked in the side of the face recently by an insane person who thinks black is a colour, when it's clearly a shade. There, do you know enough?"

Sanji just stood gaping at him.

It was clear that Zoro would not let him leave. Sanji was being held hostage, which was rather strange and though Sanji had been through various horrible experiences, this was one he had yet to encounter. Surprisingly though, he found that instead of feeling angry and pissed, he was grateful that out of all the rogue kidnappers in Japan, he had been kidnapped by Zoro Roronoa.

That didn't mean he didn't still want to kick his ass to China, but it could've been worse.

Sanji sighed. "And what about me? What makes you so sure I'm not some French rogue whose MO happens to be facial bruises curtesy of my shoes?" He had already given in, but he wanted to know what Zoro would say. It would surely be entertaining.

Zoro seemed to know he had won because he gave Sanji a smile and crossed his arms. " _Mange ta merde_."

Sanji stared at him blankly.

"See? Not French." Zoro chuckled before taking a paper out of the bottom drawer of his cupboard. "You in the mood for Chinese?"

"Huh?"

"Well, we've already established that I can't cook, I'm holding you hostage and I highly doubt you want to feed the one who abducted you, so I figure we'll resort to take-out."

There were tons of questions left in Sanji's mind.

Why was Zoro being so nice? How had he been abducted? Why couldn't he remember? What about his job at the Baratie? What did Zoro expect in return? What had the fucking bastard said in French that was so goddamn funny?

But instead of asking them, Sanji stored them away for another time and gave Zoro a smirk. "How about Italian?"

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Thanks for the reviews!_

 _lilcutieprincess: While I was writing that rink analogy, I kinda had this heart attack cause no matter how I spelt zamboni, my computer told me it was wrong so I was just like, "Is it not a word and we just pretended it existed?" but now I just stare at that red line underneath it and glare. Hope you liked the chapter!_

 _fanfiction lover 228: Thank you, you have no idea how much that means to me! I thought I might be in over my head, writing a full story for my first ever **One Piece** story and I was only introduced to it like, 6 months ago or something (the anime, I mean). I haven't seen a lot of the anime cause it's really long and reading the stories for Sanji and Zoro are weird cause they keep mentioning things I don't know about, but I'm really glad you like it! It's always hard for me to enter a new fandom cause I don't know the reaction, especially when it's a fandom I don't know much about. I always feel like I'll be beaten up metaphorically by more professional writers who are gonna be like, "YOU'RE WRONG!". Anyway, I'm having fun with this AU and it might actually be my longest story that I have planned out. It'll probably be over 30 chapters. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, even if it was a bit weird._

 _S.P. Tripathi: So this is intriguing, is it? Well, that's something I've never been told before. I'm glad you like my stories, or at least my writing style, to look into things new things that I write. When I have time to rest (which means when I finish preparing for my dad's birthday and going through a few weeks of hardcore day camp and have this story straightened out) our little "thing" will be my top priority!_

 ** _BONUS QUESTION: IF ANY OF YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT ZORO SAID, WITHOUT USING GOOGLE TRANSLATE, I WILL THINK OF A PROPER GIFT FOR YOU! (Fact: I didn't use Google translate to write Zoro's sentence, I am well educated in the French language.)_**

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 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	7. In The Kitchen With Sanji

_**Author's Note:** Okay so first of all, the next chapter (chapter 8) will take longer to do since it's been awhile since I've seen **One Piece** and I really need to watch more of it, so I'm educating myself. Also, I re-watched the Baratie arc so I could remember what the cooks looked like and that sort of stuff, never mind the inside of the Baratie, but to be honest, it was mainly so I could see Sanji's awesome introduction again. So for the past like, 3 days, I've been watching from that point on. I know, it's gonna take a while, but then watching Sanji's departure from the Baratie ... I don't even have words for it. I started to feel like an asshole for putting the cooks in the position they're in, but what's done is done. The entire story hinges on their evilness. Another thing: apparently, the French language isn't as dead as I thought it was. At the end of the chapter, I'll tell you who got it right, but for now, I have a question for you. Before the question, there's a little backstory (because when is there not?). While looking through Zoro and Sanji's profiles, I learnt that if Zoro were actually a human being and not a fictional character (I know, it's sad but true, the best men are always fictional), he'd be Japanese and Sanji would be French. It'd be make sense for a cook to know French, considering the many different recipe names that are in French, but I wanted Sanji to have a moment in which he mentioned being a foreign person and since I know the French language, I chose that foreign place to be France. Now since Zoro would also technically be Japanese and this story is set in Japan (though I realize I've never used honourifics. If you want, I can start to use them and take them into consideration when I edit the older chapters later), I couldn't have him speaking Japanese, now could I? Now here's my question: do you want Zoro to speak more French? Basically, say something to Sanji in French and drive the cook up the wall, wondering what the hell the man's saying? I've also heard that French or Spanish is the "language of love". Funny how Sanji can't understand it, considering he's such a flirt. If I were to do this, there'd be more questions, challenging you to tell me what Zoro said, without using Google translate. Think about it and then tell me in your reviews! Now for the next chapter! I don't own **One Piece.** Also, my friend called me a "crotch rot" yesterday. Had no idea what it meant. I'm not telling you, you need to look it up._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of rape**

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Chapter 7: In The Kitchen With Sanji

* * *

The first time Sanji woke Zoro up, Zoro thought the blond was dying.

It was two o'clock in the morning when he heard the screaming and ran out of his room, grabbed Wado from her usual place and rushed into the guest bedroom with his sword raised high, ready to strike. What the green-haired man came across was not an intruder as he had suspected, nor was it a murderer's ghost whom was hovering over the cook in his sleep (hey, it could happen!). What Zoro saw was worse.

Sanji lay tangled up in the sheets, sweat dripping down his forehead. He was kicking and tossing and turning, while at the same time keeping his head and arms tucked into his chest, screaming at the top of his lungs. He wasn't saying anything coherent, it was only a blood curling cry that reminded Zoro of people's last words before the guillotine took off their head.

Zoro approached the bed slowly, keeping his sword raised just in case (after all, maybe Sanji was possessed— what was he thinking? He was spending too much time with his idiot friends). He saw Sanji's face scrunch up in pain, his clothes sticking to his body as the sweat came down. His usually neat looking hair was a mess and falling into his eyes even more than usual.

Zoro reached out to brush aside Sanji's bangs when—

 _THUD!_

Sanji's foot came out of nowhere and smacked Zoro right in the jaw. Zoro fell over, hitting the ground with a loud noise and then the bedside table's lamp was on and Sanji was sitting up in bed, staring down at Zoro who lay on the floor with his sword.

"Are you trying to fucking kill me?" Sanji demanded. "What the fuck are you doing with a sword, Marimo?" he demanded furiously. "And why the hell are you in my room?"

Zoro rubbed the back of his head in pain and sat up on the floor. He didn't remember the wood being this cold. "Me? What the fuck am _I_ doing? What the fuck were _you_ doing, screaming bloody murder?"

Sanji went silent and bit his bottom lip.

Zoro picked himself off the ground and dusted off his pants. He sheathed Wado and felt around his head, trying to see if he was bleeding. Though his jaw hurt, the impact of falling had hurt more. "You kick fucking hard, bastard," Zoro told Sanji with a groan. It stung, but there didn't seem to be any blood. The world seemed a bit unsteady though …

"I was … I was screaming?"

Zoro looked over at Sanji who suddenly looked small. He had pulled his knees into himself and was gripping the sheets tightly. He was … he was _shaking_. Shit, Zoro had no idea what to do with a shaking man. He hesitantly sat on the edge of the bed and stared at his hands, resting his arms on his knees. Was he supposed to talk in this kind of situation, or leave Sanji to his thoughts? Was he supposed to ask what the dream had been about? Zoro rarely ever had nightmares and it had been so long ago that he had had one, he didn't remember how his mother had comforted him.

Zoro was contemplating whether or not he dared to open his mouth when he felt a sharp kick at his side.

Sanji was out of the covers and sitting in front of him with his legs crossed but there was no doubt that had been Sanji's leg. Zoro had become well aquatinted with Sanji's leg, far more than he was with Sanji himself. There was probably something wrong with that.

"What the fuck, cook?" Zoro demanded, glaring at Sanji.

Sanji was back to gripping the sheets tightly, but he wasn't looking at Zoro. In the dim light of the lamp, Zoro could see that Sanji hadn't only been sweating, he had been crying too. His eyes were red and though Zoro was sure Sanji would deny it, there were tear-tracks running down his face.

"Get me my cigarettes," Sanji told Zoro.

"But—"

"Now, Marimo!"

Zoro wanted to tell Sanji that he shouldn't yell at the one giving him hospitality, but he got up anyway and went to Sanji's blazer. He threw it to him and he watched as the blond took out his cigarette. His hand was trembling as he gripped the lighter and it took him four tries to light the damn thing. The moment Sanji inhaled the smoke, it seemed as though he had calmed down at least a little.

Zoro stood up, about to leave, figuring Sanji had everything under control, when he felt a cold hand on his wrist.

He stopped and turned to see Sanji, stopping him from leaving. He looked like a child who had just tugged on the back of their parent's belt to get their attention, only for the person who turned around not to be their mother or father, but a complete stranger. Sanji let go instantly and turned his head away. "Never mind."

Zoro shook his head. "If you want me to stay, then I'll stay—"

"I said never mind!" Sanji repeated, more forcefully.

Zoro nodded, but he didn't move. Instead, he just sat on the floor with his sword in his lap, waiting. He would leave later, when Sanji was calmer and was able to go to sleep again. At least, Zoro knew that's what he would've liked someone to do had he been in Sanji's situation. Not that he'd ever admit it.

Sanji closed the bedside lamp and laid back in the bed.

Zoro could hear every time Sanji turned on the mattress and it was driving him fucking insane. Part of him just wanted to tie Sanji to the bed and force him to stay put in a single position, but he knew that wasn't what the blond needed. It wasn't long before the cigarette was gone too and the dim glow it cast went out.

"Fuck," he heard Sanji mutter.

There was silence and then—

"Entertain me."

Zoro turned around and looked up at the bed in disbelief. "Excuse me?"

"I said, entertain me," Sanji said slowly, as though talking to a two year old.

" _Entertain you_?" Zoro scoffed. "How the fuck am I supposed to do that?"

"How am I supposed to fucking know? Do a dance, twirl around, sing a song or something," Sanji said. "Fucking cook me something! I don't care, just entertain me!"

It was then that Zoro realized what Sanji meant.

When he said "entertain" he didn't mean he wanted Zoro to perform tricks for him like some animal from the circus. When he said "entertain" what he really meant was "distract". And if in order to distract him Zoro had to act like a circus animal, Sanji didn't care, he just needed a distraction to get his mind off of that dream he had.

Zoro stood up and dusted off his pants once more before he took Sanji's arm gently and pulled him out of bed.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Sanji demanded, but he followed the green-haired man's lead anyway.

"Entertaining you."

Zoro brought Sanji to the kitchen and flipped on a switch. It was two in the morning, Zoro was tired, but he didn't have a tournament tomorrow so he didn't have to worry about getting up early. He could do this. If the cook needed a distraction, Zoro would give him one. One he could throw himself into entirely and forget the world.

Zoro turned to Sanji and crossed his arms over his bare chest. "Teach me how to cook."

"Pardon?"

There was that "pardon" again.

Zoro frowned. "Don't make me say it again."

"T-teach you how to cook?" Sanji said, staring at Zoro in wonder. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"You said to entertain you," Zoro replied. "So, are we going to do this or not?"

Sanji thought for a moment. "I need another cigarette," he declared.

Zoro waited impatiently as Sanji went back into the guest room and got his pack of cigarettes, lighting one up. When Sanji had the cigarette placed in between his lips as usual, he began to speak. "What makes you think I can teach you?" Sanji asked. "Marimo is supposed to _be_ cooked, not cook. You're beyond help."

Zoro grit his teeth. "What'd you say, bastard?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "How am I supposed to teach someone how to cook when they don't even know proper dining etiquette?" He sighed. "It's not that hard either. _Itadakimasu_. Is that so hard to say?"

Zoro frowned. "Look, I'm doing this for your sake, Curly Brow, so don't try my patience like this!"

Sanji shook his head and tsked, all of his body language saying he thought Zoro was a lost cause.

Zoro crossed his arms. "I have fucking table manners, you ungrateful crotch rot!"

Sanji stared at him. "Pardon?"

There it was again. That "pardon". Though the blond was unpredictable, Zoro knew there were probably some things about Sanji's manner that would never change. "My point is, I know dining etiquette—"

"Prove it."

Prove it? He wanted him to _prove it?_ "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" he demanded. He tried to do something for the cook and as usual, he just became damn infuriating! A small part of Zoro started wondering whether or not he should've just left Sanji at the Baratie. And by small, he meant not even a microscope could see it. Plus, that small corner of Zoro's brain evaporated about point five seconds later.

"Simple. You repeat after me."

"Huh?"

" _Itadakimasu_."

There was silence.

The fucking bastard was waiting for him to say. He actually expected Zoro to fucking say it! The nerve of that man! "I'm not going to fucking repeat after you, I'm not a fucking parrot!"

Sanji sighed and turned his back to Zoro. The green-haired man did not miss the mumbled, "hopeless" that came from the cook's mouth.

"Fine, dammit! _Itadakimasu_. I said it, happy?" Zoro asked, his vision almost turning red. Was this what the blond found entertaining? Driving him up the fucking wall? He was sick and twisted, Zoro decided.

"With more feeling," Sanji pressed.

With more feeling? "More feeling my ass, take what you can fucking get and get over it!" Zoro took a deep breath and tried counting to ten as the anger management therapist had stated. They had only had one session, since the therapist had ran out of the room after fifteen minutes, claiming he wasn't being paid enough to handle him. Zoro's friends claimed it was an April Fools joke. Zoro had checked the calendar. It had been July 29th. _Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten. Okay_. "Is there anything else you want me to do, _sensei_?" He tried not to grit his teeth but his jaw was squared and Sanji seemed to find it very amusing.

" _Gochisōsama deshita_."

What. The. Fuck?

"Excuse me?"

" _Gochisōsama deshita_. You say it after a meal, Marimo. It's two words, that too much for you, moss-head?" Sanji asked, challenging him with a raised (not to mention fucked up) eyebrow.

"No," Zoro declared. "That's where I draw the line! I am not yours to make a mockery out of! You're a sadistic bastard, that's what you are!"

"A sadistic bastard you decided needed saving," Sanji mused. "I would've been fine on my own."

"Fuck that!" Zoro snapped.

"Look, I don't have to stay here," Sanji said. "I'm not being held here by gunpoint or anything. I could walk out that door and go back to the restaurant any time I fucking want to. Nothing's stopping me. I think I might actually prefer Carne's treatment."

They both knew he was lying through his teeth. He shivered when he mentioned the cook's name.

 _What a fucking liar._

"Either you say it, or I'm going," Sanji threatened.

They both knew he wouldn't go. It was early in the morning, there was no way it wouldn't look suspicious to have some shirtless guy in a pair of sweats walking down Takeshita Street. His damn lighter would bring too much attention.

Zoro mumbled into his hand, turning away from the cook.

"Pardon? I couldn't hear you."

" _Gochisōsama deshita!_ " Zoro yelled. "There? Was that with enough feeling, shit cook?" Zoro demanded.

Sanji flinched and looked away. He took a long drag, staring out the window above the sink as though lost in thought before sighing and turning back to look at Zoro. "Your table manners leave much to be desired—"

"I said those fucking words already, alright? What the fuck more do you want from me?"

"I was talking about your loud chewing and burping!" Sanji snapped. "Honestly, no one who calls himself a gentleman could have such atrocious manners!"

"I never said I was a fucking gentleman!" Zoro snapped back. He sighed and rubbed his temple. "Look, just teach me, alright?"

Sanji sighed. "Okay, I'll teach you. But if we do this, you follow my rules."

Zoro nodded, vaguely wondering how a demand to entertain placed by Sanji had turned into a cooking lesson for Zoro.

"I'll teach you something simple, how to make onigiri," Sanji explained. "You're in _my_ kitchen now though, remember that."

Zoro wanted to tell him that technically, this was still _his_ kitchen and who the hell was Sanji to act like he owned the fucking place, but he just nodded. "Okay. What do we do?"

Sanji glanced at Zoro's right hand. "You gonna put that away?"

Zoro followed his gaze and his eyes landed on Wado. Right, he was still holding her. That had to be the first time Zoro had ever been unaware of his swords. He shook his head and put her aside carefully, before coming back to Sanji and sitting on a chair lazily. He yawned and was grateful he didn't have a tournament coming up. "Alright, _now_ what do we do?"

"Well what do you think, Marimo? It's a rice ball which means we need …?"

"Why are you looking at me like you're expecting me to finish your sentence?"

"That's because I am, fucking Marimo!"

Zoro nodded. It wasn't his fault it was early in the morning. His brain wasn't truly awake until at least eleven in the morning and sometimes not even then. "Right uh, to make a rice ball you need … rice?"

Sanji gave Zoro a slow, deliberate clap that left the swordsman feeling beyond stupid.

"Look at the brains on this one," Sanji said with a dry laugh. "We need nori as well, bonito shavings and sesame seeds. Do you have all that in your pantry or are we making a two o'clock stop at a convenience store or some other kind of shit?"

"You lost me after nori," Zoro admitted sheepishly. "And no fucking market place in their right mind would be open this time!"

"Where do you think all the pregnant women get their pickle-flavoured ice cream from then, eh?" Sanji challenged him.

 _Pickle-flavoured ice cream? What the fuck?_

Zoro shook his head, ridding himself of the thoughts of pickles dipped in cream. He shivered at the mere thought. "Look, can you use less complex terms? One someone of my caliber would understand?"

"You just used the word caliber and you don't know what nori is?" Sanji sighed. "Then again, you keep using a paring knife when you should be using a butter knife." Sanji shook his head and closed his eyes, as though he couldn't stand to look at the failure Zoro was in terms of kitchen etiquette. "Nori is dry seaweed and bonito shavings are dry fish flakes. Is that simple enough for you, Marimo?"

Zoro glared at him, feeling rather insulted but he nodded. "Yeah, I've got some."

"Great," Sanji said in a voice that sounded far too sarcastic. "We need a mesh strainer."

"A what strainer?"

Sanji sighed. "I'll look for it."

It didn't take long for Sanji to search through Zoro's cupboards and pull out things Zoro hadn't even known he had. It also took the cook perhaps fifteen minutes before he walked around the kitchen like he owned it and Zoro found himself believing his statement of saying that it was Sanji's kitchen now.

Zoro did have a mesh strainer, along with long grain-rice, but they only needed short-grain so Sanji put the other rice aside. As far as Zoro was concerned rice was rice. It didn't change the facts because long-grain or short-grained, Zoro liked rice and that was all that mattered to him, but _nooooo_ , they needed short-grain. He couldn't tell one brand of rice from another. As long as it didn't smell funny, Zoro figured it was good to eat and therefore he reasoned he wouldn't have to worry. When he told Sanji this, the blond stared at him before telling him Zoro couldn't be more wrong. After the first five sentences, Zoro was wandering back to dream-land while Sanji did most of the work.

When the rice was ready, Sanji explained how you had to shape the onigiri and then, after making what he called a "dimple" in it, you put the bonito shavings (they were just fucking dried fish flakes, there was no reason to give them fancy names, the damn fish wouldn't care!) into the space left by the dimple before you carefully closed up the hole left behind and then wrapped it in the nor— fuck it, it was dry seaweed, okay? Zoro wasn't going to use complicated names.

Sanji frowned once he was holding a rice ball. He handed Zoro a knife suddenly.

"What am I supposed to do with this?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "What do you fucking think, genius?"

For the most part, Zoro had been doing nearly nothing. Sanji got far too into his cooking and had just made the onigiri while lecturing Zoro, who had nearly fallen asleep. The only reason he wasn't snoring at the moment was because watching the blond cook was fascinating. It really _was_ like the kitchen became his battlefield.

"You want me to cut the seaweed?" Zoro guessed.

Sanji sighed. "It's nori—"

"I'll call it whatever the fuck I want, alright?" Zoro snapped, grabbing the knife out of Sanji's hands.

Taking the seaweed, he cut at it as though it were his latest opponent, his cuts sharp and calculated. When he was done, Sanji looked over his shoulder and Zoro heard the faint hiss of a cigarette hitting the counter.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Zoro demanded, grabbing the cigarette and throwing it into the waste. There was a burn on the counter now and though Zoro had never thought much about his countertop, he had to admit he didn't like the sudden dark mark against his otherwise light-wood counter.

"What the fuck is this?" Sanji demanded, pointing towards the chopped up seaweed.

Zoro dusted off his fingers and rolled his eyes. "Seaweed."

Sanji raised an eyebrow at him, though his eyes never left the seaweed, which made Zoro wonder how he could feel Sanji's raised brow without even seeing it. It was probably because those eyebrows were so fucked up.

"Sorry, _dry_ seaweed."

Sanji still didn't look pleased.

"Okay, what's your fucking problem?" asked Zoro. "I cut the fucking slices, I used the fucking knife you told me to and you're looking at me like I did a shit job, so if I did, fucking tell me before I take Wado and slash open your fucking throat!"

Sanji blinked.

"Wado?"

Zoro shook his head. Of course Sanji wouldn't understand his swords, no one understood his swords the way Zoro did. "Never mind—"

"Is that that white katana you had?"

Zoro looked up at the cook in amazement. No one knew that. Well, no, that was a lie. All of his friends knew that, but whenever they first heard of Zoro addressing his swords by name, they'd give him a strange look and ask him if he had been to the doctor's. No one understood immediately that Zoro was talking about his most important treasures. Except Sanji, it seemed.

"Uh, yeah," Zoro said, his throat suddenly feeling dry. He cleared it and coughed, looking away from the cook's scrutinizing gaze. "Look, is the seaweed good or not?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip and nodded slowly. "Yeah, it's good," he said. "It's … it's fucking perfect."

And for some reason, Zoro felt as though Sanji was complimenting him directly on his swordsmanship. Letting out a breath he hadn't known he was holding, Zoro nodded. "Yeah, course it is," he muttered more to himself than to Sanji. "Fucking perfect," he repeated.

That was the first night Sanji showed Zoro how to cook.

It didn't take long for Zoro to learn that Sanji wasn't the best teacher. He would try to explain what he was doing as he was doing it, but then he'd get all wrapped up in it and forget you were there. He would proceed with his cooking as though he were alone, eventually dropping explanations all together and simply humming.

Zoro had never seen the cook so free. It was during those odd morning hours that he learnt more about Sanji than he had ever learnt during those nights at the Baratie.

Zoro's cooking hadn't improved one bit since Sanji had started to "live" with him. It had been a week and Sanji was still having nightmares and Zoro was sure if he tried, he could probably remember the recipe for that special kind of sushi whose name he couldn't remember, but he was far too lazy. Besides, if he was living with such a brilliant cook, why bother trying to make any meals?

The cook didn't understand how it was that Zoro, who was fucking disabled when it came to cooking, managed to slice and dice better than anyone he had ever known, maybe even beating out Sanji himself. Zoro claimed it was because of his swordsmanship. Sanji called it bullshit.

On the occasion, Sanji would bring up the whole "kidnapping" thing, but Zoro knew Sanji didn't care about that anymore. He looked healthier when he was with Zoro, so Zoro figured he was good for Sanji's health. Those cigarettes however …

One night, when Sanji was teaching Zoro how to knead dough, he froze.

"It was them."

This wasn't Sanji's usual babble about ingredients and the temperature the oven had to be set at, nor was it about how stupid politics were. This was … Zoro wasn't sure, but was Sanji sharing with him? Willingly? Without being pressed?

Zoro stayed silent and decided that if Sanji wanted to talk, he would talk. It didn't take him long to realize that forcing answers out of the blond wasn't going to get him anywhere so he just sat there, sitting on his chair with his feet kicked up on the table.

"They were …" Sanji took a deep breath, obviously trying to control himself and his hands went out in front of him on the counter. He bent over, leaning on them, his head down. "They were grabbing at me … pulling …" Sanji's eyes closed and he turned his head away from Zoro. He was trying to sound casual, that much was obvious, but it seemed as though his voice was getting choked up. "They … they were touching me and I didn't want them to … in places I didn't want them to …"

Zoro instantly realized what Sanji was talking about. Was this his nightmare? That memory being relayed over and over again?

He heard a choked sob from the blond. "It was … they were so rough and I … I couldn't—"

"Stop."

Sanji looked up at Zoro in surprised. Zoro could see the beginning of tears ready to fall from Sanji's eyes but pretended he couldn't see them. Sanji would prefer if Zoro couldn't see his weakness, no doubt.

"W-what?" Sanji asked, staring at him.

"I said stop," Zoro repeated. "You're … you're clearly in pain at the memories, so shut the fuck up. My house has become a rehabilitation centre, not some trauma inducing environment, so get your shit together and if you still want to talk to me about it when it doesn't hurt you anymore, then you know where to find me."

Sanji stared at him in shock. "R-really?"

Zoro nodded stoically. The look on Sanji's face made him want to wipe out all of the demons that threatened the cook, but Zoro knew it wasn't his place. At the current moment, all he could do was try to piece the blond back together and help him back onto his feet.

Sanji nodded slowly, as though understanding. "Okay," he said softly. "Oh, and Marimo?"

"What, Curly Brow?"

"Your apartment's shit, you know?"

Zoro shook his head, holding in a laugh.

 _That ungrateful bastard._

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous and then I'll have a list of the people who were right about what Zoro said._

 _JustCallMeLucie (x2) : Because I didn't answer your first review cause I had already posted the other chapter, I will respond to them both now. I'm really happy that the chapter satisfied you and that you liked it! As for the kidnapping one, "All hail the kidnapping Zoro"? Should I be concerned about your liking of abduction? As for the tasting thing, well I think that since he's a cook, it wouldn't do him any good if he couldn't taste his own food, now would it? Sanji totally loves food (and not in the way that he eats it all the time, that's the way Luffy loves food), it'd be a crime for him to lose his sense of taste._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut: It was dirty, but probably not in the way you're thinking. I'm not sure how the term "Curly Brow" translates into French, if it's direct or anything, but anyway, I think I should find it strange that all of the people who reviewed didn't think Zoro was a creep for kidnapping Sanji. Devine intervention, I suppose Zoro could've used that excuse too._

 _Guest : Well uh, thing is, Zoro isn't romantic. At least, not in the traditional, orthodox way one defines the word "romantic". You can call it a fanfiction, but I like to try to keep characters in character, after all, it's those personalities we all fell in love with, right? If Zoro did say something romantic to Sanji, he'd probably be blushing. I feel like Zoro's a prude. Like, a BIG prude._

 _Guest #2 : Um... well, since you only gave me an answer, I guess I can only say thanks for taking the time to review?_

 _Axumi: So here's the deal: yeah, I put the cooks in a bad position, but it's for the sake of a plot. I do not condone abuse, in fact, I think it's awful and writing those scenes made my stomach churn, but when there are scenes like that, I can use vocabulary I usually don't and I can get really descriptive, which I enjoy. I really like writing dialogue too, especially this chapter which was tons of fun. And about HOW Sanji got abducted, well ... you'll see. Eventually._

 _lilcutieprincess: Thanks! I just felt like I was taking a risk, making Zoro do what he did, but yeah, it was fun. I try to even out the horribleness and the humour, which I hope I'm doing a good job at. I need the angst to move the plot along, but that doesn't mean I can force fluff to be there!_

 _S.P. Tripathi: So does that mean you're checking it out? One Piece, I mean. But of course Sanji and Zoro are interesting, I'd never use boring characters are my main characters. They just have a chemistry that ... I don't even know, it's just cause Sanji and Zoro are pretty matched in terms of who's more powerful in my mind so there's always this constant struggle and they seem like the kind that if they sparred together, the whole world would blow up. I like explosive couples. They entertain me endlessly._

 _Sekai Roronoa: I LOVE YOUR NAME! But moving onwards, you're French? Interesting. French is my second language, so I'm pretty confident on how I write. Did I use correct grammar? I hate verbs, but they have to exist._

 _NOW FOR THOSE WHO GOT IT RIGHT: Congratulations to: **Guest, Guest #2, Axumi and Sekai Roronoa.** Zoro DID say "eat your shit"._

 **ANOTHER QUESTION BEFORE YOU GO: Who's point of view do you like better? Zoro's or Sanji's? (Basically, do you like even numbered chapters (Sanji) or odd numbered chapters (Zoro)?**

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	8. The Trials of Socializing

_**Author's Note:** So I'm not the most satisfied with this chapter, but yeah. I kept the amount of guests of Zoro's to Nami, Luffy and Usopp because I'm able to get into their heads better than the others. Don't worry, other people WILL turn up, I'm just testing the waters with these people. See, the thing is, it didn't mean to turn out the way it did, but I suppose I like it, can't really find where I'd fix it because that would disrupt the flow of it all. So YAY, there ARE other characters in this story than Zoro and Sanji. Don't even ask why, but looking at the chapters I have planned (not all written), a lot of Zoro's chapters have titles that are parodies of songs. I don't know why, don't even ask why, but the first one that parodies is the one with Sanji cooking, you know **, "In The Kitchen With Sanji"** , instead of **"In The Kitchen With Dina"**. I feel as though I got Luffy down to the T, but I'm not sure about Nami and Usopp. Then again, this IS an AU. Thanks for the reviews will be below as usual and I've decided that each chapter, I will ask you a question! I do not own **One Piece**. This chapter came out faster than I thought since I wanted to put more people in Zoro's living room, but then decided against it._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: the following things are present in the following chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Mentions of attempted suicide, abuse and death**

* * *

Chapter 8: The Trials of Socializing

* * *

When Sanji woke up, he heard loud laughter.

It was very strange. After about a week and a half of living with Zoro, Sanji had gotten used to quiet mornings since the marimo was a grouch in the wee hours of the day.

With a sigh, Sanji pushed the blanket off of himself and got out his cigarette as usual. Lighting it up, he ruffled his hair and trudged into the kitchen. The light was on, another strange thing and when he sat down at the table he stared at the empty placemat, void of a plate, glass and utensils. He scratched his head confused, trying to think through the loud sounds of people talking.

 _Wait, talking?_

Sanji lifted his head to find many eyes staring at him.

"Um ... morning?" he greeted the strange group of people.

There were a few guests all spread out across the living room, but his eyes were drawn towards a man wearing some kind of hat with messy dark hair and big eyes who immediately jumped up from the couch and raced to Sanji. He didn't dare laugh aloud, but he had to admit the man looked rather stupid. He was wearing a straw hat, despite being indoors for some reason. "You're Sanji, right?"

Sanji looked at the man strangely. "How the fuck do you know me?"

There was a laugh, slightly high. It was female. Sanji's head turned to see a redhead sitting on the coffee table. "I think we might have just found someone who swears as much, if not more, than Zoro."

Sanji gritted his teeth. "You're not answering my question so I'll reiterate; how the fuck do you know me?"

"Well," a new voice said. Slowly, Sanji's eye seemed to fall over each of the various speakers in the room, this time landing on a man with a long nose and unruly dark hair. "You see, I battled with my old friend from the yakuza who went astray and he told me that there was some ass-kicking bastard who seemed very skilled in savate screwing around with his boss, so like a good friend, I tracked you down and beat the crap out of you—"

"I've never seen you before in my fucking life," Sanji deadpanned.

The man let out a triumphant laugh. "I was so good, you got amnesia. When it finally came back to you, you erased the memories, PTSD and all. You know how it is."

Sanji shook his head. "I have no idea who the fuck you are and what the fuck is savate?" He paused. "Is that French?"

"Hey, can you cook me something?"

Sanji turned back to the strange straw hat wearing man whom he had forgotten was next to him. "I want meat and Zoro says you're one hell of a cook, so what do you say? Make me a steak. Or lamb. Or buffalo wings— oh! Can you make spicy sauce? I love spicy sauce—"

"Luffy, leave the poor guy alone," came a deep voice.

Sanji's head turned once more to see Zoro, coming out of his bedroom. The green-haired man rubbed the back of his head and sighed. "Bastards, I knew I shouldn't have given you a key."

"Oh come on Zoro, you know you love us!" the man whom Sanji assumed was named Luffy said. "Besides, who'd be your drinking partners otherwise?"

"I'm trying to quit," Zoro told him dryly.

"Since when?" asked the redhead, leaning forward as though to hear him better. She turned to the long nose man and smirked. "I say we give him two weeks and then he cracks. How high are the stakes? 20? 35?" The girl rubbed her hands together eagerly. "Come on Usopp, place your bet!"

"20? 35? _Thousand_?" the long-nose man said in a squeak.

"What else?"

Zoro sighed and tried to rub out the crease in his brow. "Nami, I thought we were getting you away from the casinos."

"Hey, it's just a friendly gamble—"

"For your information, I haven't had sake in almost three months," Zoro told her. "I'm doing just fine."

The redhead looked put out, almost pouting. "You're no fun. Hey, Luffy," she said, turning to the straw hat man. "How about it? I'll go easy on you and start with 10."

Luffy stared at her blankly. "What are we talking about?"

Zoro sighed. "It's nothing you have to worry about. Hey, Curly Brow, what's with the dumb expression on your face?"

Sanji shook his head and held out his hands, as though commanding the world to stop. "Wait. These bastards just come in here and you're not going to explain this to me? Marimo, you better start talking. Now!"

"Marimo?" repeated Nami with a chuckle. "There's a new name for ya, eh, Zoro?"

Zoro sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Okay, let me explain. Luffy, get away from him before he goes into cardiac arrest, alright?"

"But I want meat," Luffy said with a whine.

"Later," Zoro said. He turned to Sanji. "Look, I'm sorry about this. Um, I know this isn't exactly the best way to meet them, but uh, these are my friends. Cook, meet Luffy," he gestured towards the pouting man who took a seat back on the couch, crossing his arms over his chest, looking almost like a child right before a temper tantrum. "That's his girlfriend, Nami," Zoro pointed at the redhead.

"It's rude to point, didn't you know, Zoro?" Nami growled. She gave Sanji a smile and stood up, walking over to him. She was very pretty, almost as pretty as Moodie, with her hair and those curves— no, she had a boyfriend. _Wait, a guy named Luffy, of all names, has a date and I don't?_ There was a problem with that picture to Sanji. "I'm Nami, nice to meet you," she greeted him, holding out a hand.

Sanji took her hand and gave her a small smile. He tried not to flinch too much. Luffy got into his personal space, but he had yet to touch him and for that, Sanji was grateful towards the idiotic goofball. "Sanji," he said softly.

"Charmed."

"Hey buddy!" Luffy said, standing up and grabbing his arm, pulling it back as though waiting to punch him. "Hands off!"

Zoro sent Luffy a glare. "If you raise a finger on him, you're dead."

Luffy sat back down, but he wasn't all that happy either. He was pouting again so Nami walked back over to the couch and took a seat in his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Is that better, Captain?"

Captain? What kind of weird kinks was that girl into? _Well, they do say the redheads are the wild ones._

"This is Usopp," Zoro said, pointing towards the long-nosed man.

Usopp grinned brightly. "Nice to meet you Sanji, sorry about that kick to your head. You know, I know quite a bit of savate myself and in the old days used to throw around with some of the champions. You should meet them, there was this one guy, he was huge and he had this giant-ass sword, but one look at me and he was crying 'Mommy', running out to the ring!"

Zoro snorted.

"What?" demanded Usopp.

The swordsman shook his head. "Don't listen to him," he told Sanji. "He's a very … special case."

Sanji smirked. "Like you aren't a piece of work yourself?"

Zoro grit his teeth. "Shut up, Curly Brow!"

Out of the corner of his eye, Sanji saw Nami raise an eyebrow. What was her deal?

"Hey Zoro, when's the next time you're coming to Partys?" asked the redhead.

Partys? What the hell was that?

Luffy suddenly bolted up, standing straight and knocking Nami out of his lap. Sanji grit his teeth at Luffy's carelessness. If he was dating the young beauty, shouldn't he be treating her with more respect? But he knew in the back of his mind that Luffy wasn't like Fullbody. At least, he didn't seem to be. Maybe he was just naturally thick-headed.

"Oh yeah!" The straw hat man fisted his hand and hit his other palm. "I just remembered, Nami mentioned something about maybe charging others to see the fights."

Fights? What the fuck did Zoro get himself into? Sanji was reminded once again that Zoro had told him that he often had to bail his friends out of jail. Did Zoro ever end up in the slammer?

"Nami …"

"You weren't supposed to tell him it was me, baka!" Nami said, hitting the brim of Luffy's hat. Sanji watched as the hat fell from Luffy's head and before it hit the ground, Luffy was underneath it, catching it. He stood back up and pulled it on his head, gripping the brim tightly as though to keep it from flying away in the imaginary wind.

Zoro's friends were odd. Kind of like the green-haired swordsman himself.

Zoro shook his head. "We went over this Nami, it isn't healthy what you're doing. Do we need to have you rehabilitated?"

Sanji snorted. "You know big words like that, eh, Marimo?"

"Shut up!" Zoro snapped, turning to him.

Sanji smirked. "What, not going to dazzle me with your plethora of a vocabulary?"

"Is he insulting him?"

Sanji wanted to roll his eyes at the comment from Luffy, but kept it in. It wouldn't do well to lose his temper. _Then what the fuck was all that arguing with Zoro?_ Sanji shook his head. _Oi, don't ask me, you're supposed to be on my side, you're **me**!_

"You okay, Sanji?"

Nami was looking at him with worried eyes and he had to admit to himself he probably looked stupid, getting into an internal fight with his conscience. "Fine," he replied, his jaw set. He stood up and rubbed his neck when he realized that he felt rather cold. Looking down, he remembered for the first time that he was shirtless.

Sanji wanted to die.

When he slept on the upper floor of the Baratie, Sanji would sleep sans shirt because they irritated him, especially when they rubbed against the blankets. He had developed a habit of going to sleep half-dressed, and it seemed this habit stayed with him when he slept in Zoro's guest room as well. There were only one time you could ever stumble across the cook in a state of undress and that was when he was sleeping. Whenever he took a shower, he brought an extra pair of clothes with him, even if he was the only one in the building. His clothes always showed off the least amount of skin possible; long black pants, a long-sleeved dress shirt and a blazer. There was a reason.

Standing in front of three strangers, Sanji felt exposed. It wasn't as though Zoro knew him all that much more than this strange bunch— though the swordsman knew more about the cook than he'd care to admit— and standing there in the kitchen without his top on made Sanji feel like curling up into a little ball until he sunk into the floor or some other kind of impossible shit.

The last time Sanji had looked at himself in the mirror without a shirt on, he remembered bruises. Many, many bruises across his chest, his abdomen, his stomach, his arms. It had been right after one of the cooks' beatings and he had to tend to his own wounds, which he happened to be shit at. He didn't even want to know what he looked like now, he didn't want to know what the others thought of his body.

Sanji knew he was skinny. He knew he was bony and that you could probably see his ribs. He knew he wasn't built and muscular like Zoro and he knew that there were some scars on him. He had various small cuts from bad encounters with people on the street, or in the kitchen and he remembered that there was a nasty scar near, just below where his heart was when he had gotten really desperate. Wait a minute, that meant that … Sanji's eyes flickered towards Zoro and realized that even in the dim light of his bedroom when Zoro came to pick him up after he had another nightmare before they went to the kitchen, he could see. He had seen them and Sanji hadn't even thought about them but he was sure it showed. The moment he realized that he was exposed to these strangers.

"Wow, cool!"

Luffy jumped up and raced to Sanji's side again, staring at his chest intently. Was he so stupid he had never noticed the scar? "Where'd you get that?"

 _Trying to end my own life._ Sanji bit his lip, knowing Luffy probably meant no harm. "It's not that interesting of a story," he said instead.

"Hey Zoro, it's almost as impressive as the one you've got!" Luffy said with a big smile on his face.

Sanji snorted. Yes, Zoro may have a scar across his chest, but knowing the green-haired man, it was probably given to him during a courageous battle and was some kind of battle scar that held great meaning to him whenever he looked at himself in the mirror. "Figures."

"I can tell you the story of how he got it," Usopp offered. "It was a huge mess, going against this big guy and—"

Sanji had to admit it was funny to watch the look of panic on Zoro's face when he covered Usopp's mouth with his hand. "No one needs to hear the story, Usopp," he told the man with a frown, his brows creasing. Usopp had momentarily distracted Sanji from his insecurity but it was back again in no time, what with Zoro interrupting him.

"If you guys don't mind, I'm not looking very presentable right now, so I think I'll just go and change."

Sanji tried not to walk too quickly out of the room, keeping his head down. His strides were long and powerful. He could hear Usopp muttering something about savate and how it wasn't possible someone with Sanji's leg-strength could have never heard of it.

Sanji quickly changed into different clothes.

Buttoning up his shirt, Sanji paused. There were no mirrors in the guest bedroom, but he knew there was a full-length mirror in Zoro's room, from what he remembered. He had walked into the swordsman's room only once during his stay and it was because he had had another nightmare. He had waited a few minutes but the swordsman hadn't come so he went out in search of him. He still wasn't completely comfortable with the apartment layout so he had a few wrong turns, but when he finally got to the green-haired man's room, he found him sleeping. The moment Sanji noticed the appearance of the full-length mirror which was directly across from the bed, he avoided it like the plague. That was the only time he ever entered Zoro's room because ever since that night, Zoro would either come to him, or Sanji would wait in the hallway, knocking on his door so that he wouldn't have to chance looking in that cursed mirror.

Zoro had seen him almost every night for the past week and a half, without ever saying a word. He didn't mention the scars at all. _Maybe he's too disgusted to say anything?_

Sanji shook his head. No, Zoro wasn't like that. Or at least, he hoped he wasn't.

Slipping on his blazer, he lit up a new cigarette and sighed. When he was about to enter the living room, he heard chattering. He would've ignored it and entered anyway, but then he heard his name.

"—where's Sanji from?"

Sanji froze. God, was Zoro going to tell them? What had Zoro told them about Sanji anyway? He had at least mentioned he was a cook and that he was staying with him. What else did they know? Sanji's fist curled and his jaw clenched. What happened to him was his own business! He chose who heard about his unfortunate life, he was the one who decided who got to know about his horrible encounters with the cooks! Only him! Zoro had not right to tell them anything!

To be honest, Sanji had been waiting for the other shoe to drop. The fact of the matter was that Zoro was too kind.

Sure, the swordsman was rough around the edges. He screamed a lot, swore, had a bad temper. He couldn't cook (even after Sanji took the time to explain it to him), he couldn't fold laundry, he didn't seem to have enough money to pay his rent (if the amount of money he had given Sanji was really all he had in his wallet) and he was irrational. The man had kidnapped him for God's sake! But Zoro was also patient (or at least, he tried to be), he didn't press too much, he never brought up Sanji's past. He didn't mention the cooks, never treated him any differently from anyone else he knew. Zoro treated Sanji in a way that Sanji had only thought Zeff was able to. He treated him like he was human.

A man like that couldn't possibly exist, at least not in Sanji's world.

Sanji held his breath, waiting for Zoro's answer.

"Not telling."

"What?!"

 _My thoughts exactly._

"Look Nami, it's not my business to tell you," said Zoro. "Seriously. If he wants to tell you his story, that's his job, not mine. Don't do that, you look stupid with your mouth hanging open like that."

"Are you protecting him or something?" asked Luffy. "Like, I dunno, from the cops or something? Zoro, are you hiding a wanted man?!"

"No, it's nothing like that," Zoro insisted. "It's just not my place to tell you."

"I bet he's in the yakuza," declared Usopp.

"Okay Zoro," said Luffy. "I trust you. I still want to know, but I'll trust you on this. But Zoro …" Luffy trailed off and there was silence.

"What?" asked Zoro. "You want to say something, so spit it out, Straw Hat!"

"Hey, don't diss the hat!" Luffy said. "But seriously, I thought you were straight."

Sanji's eyes widened. _What was that all about?_

"I am," Zoro said quickly. Almost too quickly. "Look, just cause I took the guy in doesn't mean I'm gay or anything." There was a pause. "Luffy, trust me, even if I _was_ gay, which I'm _not_ , I'm sure he wouldn't take well to any advances. I've seen him flirt, he's as straight as a wooden plank."

"But Zoro …"

"Not you too Nami!" There was a grunt and Sanji could imagine Zoro pulling at his hair. "Look, you two can just shut it!" There was a pause and then Zoro spoke again. "Why are you looking at me like that, Nami?"

There was a sigh. "It's just … It's different. To see you this happy."

"What, am I usually grumpy?"

 _Yes actually, you are, didn't you know, Marimo?_

"No, it's just …" Nami took a deep breath. "Ever since _she_ died, you've haven't been as … lively? Active? I don't know the word for it, but it's just that when you're around Sanji, it's different. You're more animated, you let yourself go and just … I dunno, you flow better."

"I _flow_ _better_?"

Sanji could hear the disbelief in Zoro's voice. What the fuck was that girl talking about? What did it mean to "flow"? What, was she talking about chi or some other kind of strange shit?

"Hate to admit it Zoro, but Nami's right." That was Usopp. Sanji had been wondering where he had gone. "I mean, I'm not expert, but wasn't that what it was like with—"

"Shut up!"

There was silence.

Sanji could hear Zoro's heavy breathing.

"Shit, I'm sorry Usopp. It's just …"

"I know man, I know."

More silence.

Suddenly, Nami spoke. "Sanji's taking a long time, isn't he?"

"Yeah, you're right," said Zoro. "I'll go check on him."

Immediately, Sanji jumped and nearly hit his head on the wall. He took a step closer towards the living room before pausing. Would it seem too suspicious to just turn up now, after they mentioned him? Dammit, what was he supposed to do?

"Oi! Curly Brow, get your ass back here!"

Sanji took a deep breath and let himself walk into the living room and took a seat on the giant comfy chair that was horizontal to the TV. "Staring at my ass Marimo? Careful or else I might think you bat for the other team." That was good. Casual. Normal.

"You clean up nicely, Sanji!" said Nami.

"Oh this?" Sanji stared at his usual attire and shrugged. "Just threw it on really."

* * *

Usopp, Nami and Luffy stayed around the apartment much longer than Sanji thought they would. He ended up cooking lunch for Luffy and was praised immensely for his wonderful chicken. It wasn't quite the same as hearing Zoro hold in a moan as he ate his sushi, but it was satisfying all the same. Zoro's friends were rather entertaining for Sanji, enough so that he became distracted of what he had been thinking about beforehand. Something about Zoro and a girl? Or was it about Zoro's sexuality? It didn't matter, as far as Sanji was concerned, the swordsman had to be asexual.

When the three finally left late at night, Sanji was exhausted and ready to fall asleep on the floor. There was a bit of a mess left behind, some beer bottles (none of which had been drunken by Zoro, to Sanji's surprise— after all, it was cheap beer, right?) and a couple of wrappers of some candies besides the dishes.

"I'm going to bed," Zoro declared.

"Marimo, get your fucking ass back in here right now! I'm not doing the dishes on my own, you bastard!" Sanji snapped.

He heard Zoro sigh before he returned and grabbed a dish towel. "What's the point of it anyway? We're going to use the dishes again anyway tomorrow morning, why don't we just clean them then?"

"Because that's disgusting," Sanji said, wrinkling his nose. "The crumbs and stuff with bring in unwanted visitors—"

"Unwanted visitors?" Zoro repeated. He let out a laugh. "Why don't you just call them bugs? Seriously, everything about you is too proper."

Sanji shook his head. "I'll wash, you dry. Even you're able to do that, right, Marimo?"

Zoro grumbled, but they fell into a rhythm. Sanji would clean the dish and hand it to Zoro who would dry it and put it away.

"So, sorry about my friends," Zoro said after some silence. "The visit was incredibly unexpected and I'll beat them up for it later, I promise." He put away a plate before turning back around. "I know they're fucking idiots, but they're my friends, so I gotta love 'em."

"It's fine, it was a very … entertaining day." Sanji told him. "About Luffy …" he trailed off.

"Yeah, he's always that eccentric," Zoro said. "And Nami's still trying to get him to go gamble but he doesn't see the point in it. She's gotten better since they've started dating, but still, she's a piece of work."

"And Usopp?"

"Look at his nose, think of Pinocchio and I swear, you'll watch it grow."

The two of them laughed. Each time Zoro managed to make Sanji laugh, it felt less and less forced. Hopefully, it would eventually feel natural. Sanji shook his head. What was he thinking? That ship had long past sailed.

"So you seriously don't know what savate is?"

"No. It's French, isn't it?" Sanji asked.

Zoro nodded.

"I knew it!"

The green-haired man chuckled. "It's a form of boxing. _Savate_ is the French word for 'old shoe' and since this form of boxing uses the feet a lot, I suppose it fits. Basically, savate is mixing together the use of hands and feet. You know, it also has another name; _savate de rue_. The style is mainly used for self-defence and _savate de rue_ , or street savate, is a style of fighting that was actually fought on the streets of Paris and Marseille, like the name implies. With your powerful kicks, I'm sure you'd be great at it."

Sanji nodded slowly. "So you told them about my kicks?"

"If i didn't tell them about your kicks, how could I warn them about any injuries that may have been inflicted on my head? They'd need to know the reason I could potentially be sent to the hospital due to being forced into a coma thanks to you and your damn boots."

Sanji handed Zoro a glass, their fingers brushing lightly. The swordsman looked unfazed, as though he hadn't even realized it had happened, but Sanji felt a shiver go up his spine. Unlike the other times when someone touched him, he didn't flinch. He didn't feel as though he had been doused with cold water, as though he were vulnerable or useless. He just felt … fine. Normal. And God, was it the best feeling in the world.

When Sanji went to his room and closed the door, he fell down on the bed. He felt as though he had just been refreshed, despite the fact that he was tired. Maybe savate was something worth looking into. What did he have to lose, after all? As his eyes drifted close, a nagging voice in the back of his mind told him this was dangerous.

He was getting comfortable. He was starting to feel safe. He was starting to feel cared for.

He ignored the voice and politely told it to shut the fuck up, because it had been years since he had gone to bed feeling this good.

That night, Sanji had no nightmares.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Now the thanks for the reviews:_

 _lilcutieprincess: So the odd numbered chapters are Zoro's. Since the story is set in Japan, everyone is speaking Japanese, it's just not written that way cause I don't know much Japanese. Though, I think it would be cool for Sanji to know a language other than Japanese that he could speak in so Zoro wouldn't be able to understand him._

 _JustCallMeLucie : When you said "Sanji's confession" I was like, "WHAT? HE DIDN'T CONFESS TO ANYTHING YET!" But then I realized you meant like, what he told Zoro in the kitchen and not a confession of love. Like all things, the reason why Sanji told Zoro then will remain a mystery until stated otherwise!_

 _Guest : I just like to alternate, it's fun that way for me. I really enjoy writing about how other characters see other characters, like writing about Sanji from Zoro's point of view. I like to have a character think one thing about another character and be trying to guess what's going on in their mind and catch small things they do that the character themselves don't notice, like how it took Sanji several tries to light his cigarette. If the chapter was told by Sanji, he probably wouldn't have noticed it. Zoro noticed exactly how many failed attempts he had. Seeing someone through someone else's eyes is fun. At least, for me to write._

 _Dyloa: Well, that's fun, isn't it? (I'm not teasing you.) My friend's actually from Belgium, she came to Canada (cause I'm proudly Canadian) and all of our doors were backwards for her so it took her a while to open them. When she had to push, we had to pull. It was interesting watching her try to get out of class to use the bathroom. Anyway, I hope you review to more chapters in the future! I'm on a summer break, therefore making updates more regular and I try to keep a schedule. I can't focus on more than one story at a time, which is why a lot of my other stories remain inactive at the moment. I decided to dedicate myself to this story for the summer at least. One of my friends showed me **One Piece,** so I guess this story is dedicated to her, but I don't even know if she likes the Zoro and Sanji pairing. Anyway, thanks for the review, I really appreciate it! If I ever write something in French later, don't hesitate to correct me if I get something wrong, I can always use the help!_

 _Guest #2: Thanks, I hope you liked this one too!_

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : The main reason why the kitchen scene lasted so long, and the whole argument about Zoro's table manners was because I read it over and was like, "Dammit, it's only like, 2000 words, I need to get to 3000 at least somehow!" and thus, pointless banter was created. I actually think that last chapter was one of my favourites to write._

 _Ayamichan34: Wow, to know that someone cares that much about what I write and would care if I stopped ... I have to admit, I've never been told that before. Out of curiosity, what is your usual pairing? Um, Zeff's whereabouts ... can't say, it'd be spoiling! Also, if this isn't your usual pairing, how'd you come across this story anyway?_

 _Now, the votes for who's chapter is liked more are in._

 _Out of the 4 people who answered my question, (out of 7 reviews, which isn't a bad number at all, and one person just said both, so if the amount of votes don't add up, that's why), the results were this:_

 _Zoro/odd numbered chapters: 3_

 _Sanji/even numbered chapters: 2_

 _NOW MY QUESTION TO END THE CHAPTER (WHICH WILL NOW BE OCCURRING REGULARLY): When Sanji asked Usopp how he knew him, Usopp told him a lie. IF SANJI ASKED YOU HOW YOU KNEW HIM, WHAT LIE WOULD YOU TELL HIM? I will mention the lies I found the most amusing during my next update!_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	9. Zoro R: Kendo Champ, Part-Time Therapist

_**Author's Note** : So I was inspired by **Random Word Association** , a **Naruto** story by **CerealK** , which I thought was beyond hilarious. A few weeks ago, my friend jokingly said, "I'm bored, want to discover the depths of my soul?" and having recently read that story, I was like, "Sure!" She wasn't serious, but we ended up doing it for like, a whole hour and I found out some interesting things. I, quite personally, don't put much faith in psychology, like Zoro, but she told me herself, after I explained what I thought each word meant, that I had gotten like, half of my assumptions correct. She wouldn't tell me the ones I had wrong, but it was fun. This chapter is actually a mix of two chapter ideas put into one (and yet it's not very long). Thanks for the reviews will be found below. Also, I know only the 4Kids dub does the lollipop thing, but I looked at other changes the 4Kids dub does and I was like, "NOO! YOU'RE RUINING ANIME!". I do not own **One Piece** , or **Horton Hears A Who**._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 9: Zoro Roronoa: Kendo Champ, Part-Time Therapist

* * *

It had officially been three months since Zoro had first walked into the Baratie, almost three weeks since Sanji had been living with him and fifteen minutes since Zoro realized he didn't have a single fucking clue who Sanji was.

Though the cook didn't seem to know French, that didn't mean he wasn't a rogue from elsewhere. Maybe from America, or Brazil. Maybe he was Italian— no, but Italian was too similar to French for him to have possibly misunderstood what Zoro had said. So then, that could only mean he wasn't a foreign rogue. He could be an escaped member of the yakuza, but then that brought up questions like, if he was part of the yakuza, how was his fighting style so similar to savate and yet he had never heard of it? And if he ran away from the yakuza, didn't that mean he was _good_? But then again, Zoro could say that Sanji had no real fighting style, since he had never seen Sanji in an actual fight before. Maybe the blond fought differently than what Zoro thought. He couldn't be certain though. But everything about Sanji told him that he wasn't a rogue _. But it could all be an act— dear God, you're paranoid, aren't you?_

Needless to say Zoro needed answers before he drove himself up the wall and went insane. Or rather, _more_ insane.

Catching Sanji off guard was harder than the swordsman anticipated.

You wouldn't think it'd be difficult. The blond had been put on house-arrest (or rather, apartment-arrest) curtesy of Zoro and could therefore, not escape any awkward conversations. Sanji had a way with words that lead to distracting Zoro whenever he brought up any questions that he desperately wanted the answer to. Sure, it was all okay when that question happened to be "What's your favourite movie?", but there were other questions, like, "Who's the head chef at the restaurant?" that caused him to get rather unhappy when the cook denied him answers. On some days, he'd be willing to share that he thought Rie Kugimiya needed a better job than playing tsunderes on shows were quite childish (followed by which, Zoro asked him how he knew of this voice actress if he thought she played stupid roles), or that he enjoyed watching the rain, but he'd never want to be caught in it. But then on other days he would refuse aggressively when asked where he had lived before the Baratie, or when questioned about why he had never run away before. He wouldn't even tell Zoro his favourite dish to cook— though, to be fair, Sanji's answer had been that no meal should be preferred over another in terms of taste, and therefore no meal should be favoured over another based on preparation.

"Hey, Marimo, breakfast is ready!"

Zoro looked up from his seat at the table to see Sanji offering a plate of eggs and bacon. He took it and grumbled under his breath non-coherent things.

"Hey, I was wondering, when'd you get those earrings?" Sanji gestured towards the three small golden hoops in Zoro's left ear.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Zoro said with a mouthful of food, so it came out more as; "'eh, 'sn't hair!"

Sanji laughed.

Zoro resisted the urge to smile. Every time Sanji laughed, it seemed less and less strained. He knew it wasn't the way Sanji's eyes came close to lighting up or the way the cook nearly smiled that made him feel such joy, it was surely just because as someone who had decided to take care of the curly browed cook, it was nice to know that he was warming up to him. No, it had nothing to do with the way Sanji's lips seemed to curl into a smirk that was far too alluring to be legal.

Zoro swallowed. "That's not fair!" he repeated, more clearly this time. "You can't ask me questions and expect me to give you answers while you refuse point-blank to answer any of mine!"

"I don't believe you gave me an answer," Sanji said. "I think this is completely fair."

"Look, I care about you, okay? Despite the fact that you're a downright bastard, you're a somewhat decent guy—"

"I'm flattered."

"Shut up!" Zoro sighed and tried to breathe calmly. "Look, I just think that as the one who's looking after you—"

"More like the one who's holding me against my will—"

"You haven't left yet!" Zoro snapped. "God, just shut up, will you? I don't have the patience for this, really, I don't. Let me just get this all out, alright?"

"Are we going to be like girls and braid our hair and shit?"

Zoro shook his head. "You're not helping." He waited a few moments for an apology, but he already knew Sanji wasn't going to give him one. "Anyway, I just want to know more about you. Is that a crime? I mean what do I know about you? You like poetry, you're obsessed with Shakespeare—"

"It's not an obsession!" Sanji cut in but Zoro rolled his eyes.

"Oh please! And what else? You can't speak French for shit, you kick fucking hard and yet have never heard of savate and you cook a fucking orgasmic sashimi! Sorry if I want to know more about the person who's invading my house!"

"This isn't a house, Marimo, it's an apartment. A fucking shit-hole apartment at that. And I didn't invade, need I remind you _you_ were the one who adducted _me_ , _I'm_ the victim here!"

 _"Vraiment, tu es trop dramatique, n'est-ce pas?"_

Sanji stared at him, confused. "Did you just insult me?"

"You'll never know," Zoro told him with a smirk. He didn't want to pick a fight with the cook, he honestly didn't, but he couldn't seem to get the cook to talk to him any way else. He was so reserved, so introverted and yet at the same time, he acted very social when it suited him. It was infuriating, it was almost like having a bipolar girlfriend nagging at him— wait, girlfriend? As in, a romantic relationship? _Well, I suppose, the bastard's attractive, in a skinny, lean way— no, wait, he's a bastard! A secretive, conniving, sadistic bastard!_

"Look, I'm not in the mood to fight with you, okay?" Sanji asked. "It's the morning and I'm tired and I just need some fucking sleep—"

"Did they come back?" The question slipped out before he cold stop himself. Recently, the cook's late night visits to his room had stopped. Zoro didn't have to keep himself half-awake to hear the soft sound of feet on the carpet outside his door, nor did he have to sleep till mid-day from exhaustion of staying up till four in the morning, learning how to stuff a turkey. Like he'd ever use that in real life. The nightmares had definitely stopped, or at least, he hoped they had stopped. Maybe the cook was just getting better at hiding his pain, after all, the cook was so selfless he probably thought his problems were a bother to others. Though Zoro would never admit it, he kind of missed the late night rendez-vous, for a reason he would totally never think too much about.

"No," Sanji replied, looking away from him. "No, I haven't had one in a while."

"Well that's a good thing, isn't it?" Zoro asked.

"Yeah …"

"So what's the problem?"

Sanji sighed and took a new cigarette from his pack. The smell had begun to linger in the apartment and for some reason, it didn't annoy Zoro as much as it used to. In fact, he had begun to relate the smell of nicotine to spices, seasoning and an indescribably intoxicating scent that Zoro swore could not be natural. To Sanji.

"It's nothing," the cook said. "Just thoughts keeping me up."

"About what?"

Sanji turned to him sharply. "What's it to you, Marimo? Must you stick your nose in everyone's fucking business?"

"When that person's under my roof, I think I have the right!"

"It's a shitty roof!"

"As you've mentioned before!"

For a reason neither of them could fathom, the two began to laugh. Zoro couldn't understand why, but his stomach started hurting as his body shook. In reality, throwing insults wasn't really all that funny and yet for reason reason, he found it hilarious. Perhaps it was because of the way Zoro hadn't even tried to deny the horrible quality of his apartment (though the landlord would have a field day should she ever hear about it), or the way Sanji had resorted to using such a stupid comeback. Whichever the case (thought Zoro suspected it was neither), the two were laughed and Sanji was wiping tears out of his eyes.

And that's when Zoro realized it.

The cook was actually laughing. He was laughing with abandon and there was no denying the way his lips curled upwards in a smile. Perhaps the smile was slightly crooked and could be thought of as a smirk and maybe Sanji didn't look the most attractive while he was laughing, holding onto the counter to steady himself, but Zoro was satisfied. Hearing a natural, happy laugh from the blond was something he had never witnessed before and now that he had, Zoro wondered why Sanji had ever bothered to warp it into a strange, cold, empty chuckle that sounded mocking. But then he remembered why.

Though the reason for their argument might have been forgotten by Sanji, Zoro didn't forget. He had to do something about it, because he knew that while the cook wasn't anywhere close to being ready to confront his problem head-on, he needed to heal and the first step towards healing was talking. And Goddammit, Zoro was going to make the fucking bastard talk, whether he wanted to or not.

* * *

"Sit on the couch."

Sanji looked up at Zoro from the stove. "But—"

"Don't question it, just do it, Curly Brow."

Zoro waited as Sanji turned off the stove and covered the pot with a lid before he sat down on Zoro's well-worn out couch. Zoro dropped his bag on the floor and brushed the sweat away from his face. A day at the gym had him tired out, but not tired enough that he wouldn't give this a try. He took a seat in the chair near the TV and looked Sanji straight in the eye, unblinkingly.

The blond met his gaze without hesitation.

There was silence. It wasn't the kind of silence Zoro was used to. Most of the time, there was a tense silence between him and his opponent before he utterly destroyed them in a match. Every now and then he and his strange oddball group of friends fell into an awkward silence as Usopp told yet another ridiculous lie, or Luffy said another ridiculously naive and pointless thought that no one really had to know. He knew awkward silence and tense silence. This was different. It was … comfortable. Like he didn't feel like he needed to say anything, didn't see a reason to break the silence.

But he had to, or else he'd never get anything done.

"Have you ever heard of the game Random Word Association?"

Sanji blinked. "What?"

"It's a game that people play when they're bored, usually works best with two people. One person says a word and the other person says the first word that pops into their head when they hear that other word," Zoro explained. "Hanging out with Luffy sometimes feels like an endless game of Random Word Association," he added as though as an afterthought.

"What does that have to do with me?" asked Sanji. "I was cooking dinner, so unless you want take-out—"

"Random Word Association is also used by therapists," Zoro cut him off. "They use it to psychoanalyze others and figure out things about their personality. It shows them what people relate to certain things and how long it takes the person to respond also tells them how willing they are to speak about a certain topic," Zoro elaborated. "Some guy named Freud came up with it."

"And your point is…?"

"I want to do a psychoanalysis. If you'll let me."

Sanji blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. Then—

"What the fuck?"

Zoro shook his head. "It's just for fun, I don't put much faith in psychology anyway. I have a timer and everything, so why don't we kill some time? Shouldn't take longer than maybe, fifteen minutes? That thing can cook on its own for that long, can't it, without worrying about needing to call 119, right?"

Sanji looked back at the stove with a frown.

"I'm right, aren't I?"

Sanji sighed. "I suppose …"

"So entertain me, it'll be fun," Zoro insisted. "Or are you scared I'm going to unlock your inner most secrets, cook?"

Sanji shook his head. "Just try me."

Zoro waited while Sanji went back to turn on the stove and took out his stopwatch. To be dreadfully honest, he hadn't expected Sanji to agree. This meant that all these words that were about to come out of his mouth were completely unprepared and would probably be random. There were certain words that Zoro knew he wanted to know what the cook had to say about, but there were others that had slipped his mind while on his way back from the gym.

When Sanji took his seat again, he smirked at Zoro. "So, are we going to get started?"

"Give me a sec, Curly Brow," Zoro shot back. He thought for a moment, his finger hovering over the start button on the stopwatch. "Okay. First one. Red."

 _Start_.

"Blood."

 _Zero point three seconds._

Zoro wasn't sure if he should be concerned, but then again, when he thought of red, he thought of blood too. But this was a cook, he would've expected champagne or wine or some other kind of winery shit.

"Black."

"Death."

 _Zero point six seconds._

Wasn't black Sanji's favourite colour? It was still a fucking shade, but Zoro supposed it was a debatable topic to many people on the Earth so he decided to let the fact that the blond's favourite colour wasn't even a colour slide. Just this once. But taking zero point six seconds … did that mean death was a topic that Sanji didn't enjoy?

"Food."

"Cooking."

 _Zero point one seconds._

Zoro wanted to laugh at the reflex. _Said like a true cook._

"Dreams."

"Illusions."

 _Zero point twenty-nine seconds._

Pessimistic, wasn't he? Though Zoro had to admit he saw no reason for Sanji to be optimistic.

"Fear."

"Pain."

 _Zero point forty-seven seconds._

"Friends."

"Non-existent."

 _One point seventy-eight seconds._

"Love."

"Hurts."

 _Two point seventeen seconds._

"Damaged."

Sanji looked away from him. He shook his head and bit his bottom lip, refusing to let the words come out. They had been doing so well and then Sanji had shut himself in again. This wasn't going to work if Sanji didn't trust him. And that gave Zoro an idea for his next word, if Sanji ever came up with an answer to this one. Sanji muttered something, but Zoro couldn't hear it.

 _Four point ninety-six seconds. Four point ninety-seven seconds. Ninety-eight. Ninety—_

"Me."

 _Four point ninety-nine seconds._

Zoro stared at Sanji, dumbstruck. He wasn't sure if the blond realized it, but he had just opened up to Zoro in a way that he had never done before. It scared Zoro, to see the cook so open and yet at the very same time, Zoro was very glad he was the one seeing this vulnerable side to Sanji.

Zoro said nothing about Sanji's answer and moved onto the next word. "Trust."

"False."

 _Zero point five._

Okay, clearly someone had trust issues, not that Zoro could blame him.

"Nakama."

Sanji gave him a strange look. "What the fuck?" He shook his head. "You already said 'friend', you can't say 'nakama'."

"But nakama and friend are two different things," Zoro protested. "A friend is someone who's close to you, who you share things in common with, right? But a nakama is like family. They're closer than a friend, and sometimes you hate them, but you have to love them anyway, right? In the most platonic way possible, of course."

Sanji bit his bottom lip and sighed. Obviously he saw Zoro's point.

"I'll say it again Sanji. Nakama."

Sanji shifted and turned his head away from Zoro again, faster and more sharply this time.

Zoro waited.

 _Six point twenty-three seconds. Six point twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-six, twenty-seven—_

"Sanji, I said nakama."

"I heard you, you fucking marimo!"

 _Six point thirty seconds._

"Then what's the fucking problem?" Zoro snapped.

If Zoro wasn't hallucinating, through the smoke he could've sworn he saw a light blush on Sanji's pale cheeks. "It's embarrassing," Sanji said.

"Fucking tell me," Zoro said, glaring at him.

 _Seven point nine seconds. Seven point ten, point eleven, point twelve—_

"You."

It was so quiet, Zoro almost didn't hear it. Sanji was definitely blushing now, but he turned his head away and the smoke clouded him from the swordsman who was reeling from his answer. _You_. As in … Zoro? But, how? _Why_? It didn't make any sense. Another thing didn't make sense.

"But you said friends were non-existent, how can I be a fucking nakama?" Zoro demanded. "You have to be a friend at least to be nakama," Zoro insisted. "What the fuck is going on in your head, Curly Brow?"

"How am I supposed to fucking know?" Sanji snapped.

"It's your head!" Zoro snarled back.

"Well my head isn't the most sane place to be!" Sanji said, throwing his hands in the air. "You think this makes any sense to me? You've got to be fucking kidding me, this is insane! Utter and complete ludicrousness!" Sanji shook his head. "I can't even find words to describe how pissed off I am! Fuck, you're driving me up the wall!"

There was silence that fell over them both. This time, Zoro knew this silence. It was the tense silence that you were scared to break for fear of what would happen next. It was the silence that made your blood run cold and made you question your next move, trying to figure out what to do, what move is safest against your opponent. But Zoro's opponent was Sanji and he had no clue what to do with the cook.

 _Beep! Beep!_

"Shit!"

Sanji sprinted up from the couch and ran into the kitchen, turning off the stove.

The tension was gone and the moment, whatever the fuck you wanted to call it, was over.

* * *

"Let me try."

"Try what?" asked Zoro through a mouthful of Sanji's wonderful stir-fry meal.

Sanji's nose wrinkled in disgust as Zoro's lack of table manners.

In order to annoy the blond further, Zoro proceed to chew with his mouth open.

"I want to take a shot at this psychoanalysis thing too."

 _SPLAT!_

Zoro recoiled as Sanji wiped his face clean of the combination of vegetables, rice and meat. He was clearly unamused as he pulled a piece of chicken out of his hair. He sent Zoro a glare before throwing away the napkin. "Was it so shocking you had to waste precious food, Marimo?" demanded Sanji with a frown.

What was the deal with this man and food?

"Give me your stopwatch, I'm going to give it a try. You left it on the coffee table, right?" Sanji stood up without a word and headed towards the coffee table, walking with a purposeful stride in his step.

"What do you know about psychology?" demanded Zoro, too stunned to move from the table.

"What do _you_ know about psychology?" Sanji shot back, raising an eyebrow at him. Zoro wasn't able to formulate a response so instead, he merely sat there while Sanji walked back, tossing the stopwatch in the air and catching it swiftly with almost no effort.

"Asshole," Zoro muttered.

"Well, this asshole's going to psychoanalyze you, so tough luck," Sanji told him. He took his seat once more and lit up his next cigarette. "Hmm, what should I say?" He let the string of the watch intertwine between his knuckles, watching it as though fascinated. "Okay. Difficult."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "I'm not doing this."

"You did it to me, it's only fair I do it back. This wouldn't have been a problem had you decided you weren't all that interested in my psyche, but apparently, you, who doesn't believe in psychology, decided to take a gamble with my personality by throwing around random words and forcing me to associate them. What if you know my darkest, deepest inner secrets now? I can't let you run off, scot-free, so we're doing this. I didn't complain nearly as much as you are now so take it like a man. You _are_ a man, right?"

That was it. Zoro had to do it now, Sanji had just put his manliness in question and therefore all cards were to be thrown on the table. Considering his little faith in psychology, he highly doubted Sanji would come up with anything concrete anyway.

"Fine, repeat your word," Zoro grumbled.

"Difficult," said Sanji, smirking, knowing he had won.

"Shitty bastards with curly eyebrows."

 _Zero point twenty-six seconds._

"You're allowed to say sentences?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I dunno," Zoro said with a shrug. "It was my first thought though, so it has to count."

"If long sentences count, then I want a redo!"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "You don't get a redo, that's part of the whole being a shitty bastard with curly eyebrows deal. Now ask— _state_ , your next word."

Sanji grumbled, but conceded. "Fun."

"Winning."

 _Zero point three seconds._

"Friend."

"Idiots," came Zoro's immediate response.

 _Zero point two seconds._

Sanji let out a laugh. "What would they think if they heard you say that to their face?"

"I always say it to their face, it's no secret Luffy's as smart as a hammer," Zoro scoffed.

"Love."

"Bullshit."

 _Zero point four seconds._

Sanji laughed once more. "You're a negative person, aren't you?"

"You're the one who said love hurts," Zoro shot back. "Moving on?" he pressed. He just wanted Sanji to finish this bullshit analysis so he could finish his dinner and live in peace. Besides, he couldn't thoroughly dissect everything the cook said with him still in the room, so he had to make this "analysis" of Sanji's short, before he forgot all of Sanji's answers.

"Destiny."

"Bullshit."

 _Zero point two seconds._

"You already said bullshit," Sanji said.

"And I'll say it again," Zoro replied. "Doesn't make it any less true. What, does that mean I only get one bullshit per psychoanalysis?"

Sanji shook his head. "And if I said soulmates …?"

"Guess," Zoro challenged him.

"Bullshit?"

Zoro smirked. "What, don't tell me you believe in soulmates, Curly Brow?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, no," Sanji admitted, looking away. "But I have my reasons."

"And so do I, now are we done yet? Or do I have to wait until this food gets cold?"

"One more," Sanji said. He took a deep breath, as though steeling himself for Zoro's answer before he said, "Nakama."

Zoro stared Sanji straight in the eye. "You."

 _Zero point ninety-six seconds._

 _"What the fuck?"_

Zoro smirked. "See how confusing that is?" Zoro threw his hands up in the air. "Don't ask me explain, cause I can't, but when you say nakama, I think of you. Apparently, we both think of each other. Not like it matters or anything," he added quickly. It couldn't mean anything. Zoro had absolutely no trust in psychology so this stupid word association game was nothing but to kill time and pretend to know what the other person was thinking. But still, he would never admit it, but hearing Sanji say that he thought of him when someone said "nakama" made him sort of, kind of, very insignificantly, almost like the size of that speck that lived on that dandelion fluff in _Horton Hears A Who_ happy.

Of course, knowing it took the cook over seven seconds to figure it out was something he was a bit less enthusiastic about, but he'd take what he could get.

"Now, if you don't mind, Mr. I Think Of Death When Someone Mentions My Favourite Colour With Isn't A Fucking Colour, It's A Shade, I'm going to retire because quite frankly, I'm tired and I've stuffed my face enough. If I eat anymore of your food, I might become irreversibly bloated and I'm a kendo competitor, not a sumo wrestler."

With that, he bid the astounded cook goodnight and went into his room, unsure of what to think of the little game they had played.

He fell asleep to the sound of Sanji washing the dishes.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Now for the reviews!_

 _lilcutieprincess: I hope you liked this chapter! Coming up with lies for Usopp was actually pretty easy, since I have a very overactive imagination. If you ever think of a lie, tell me! I'd be happy to hear it!_

 _Nessiebaby: Wow, I'm really glad people look forward to my updates that much! It's very flattering!_

 _JustCallMeLucie: That's a very ... interesting lie. In terms of Zeff appearing ... um ... I'm not actually sure when he'll turn up. Not very soon though,_

 _fanfiction lover 228: Interesting lie once more. I have to say, drag queens? Not sure what to say about that, actually._

 _Guest : Um, I have bad news for you. I, quite personally, am a fan of developing relationships. To the point where everyone will hate me and scream that they've done EVERYTHING but had sex yet. I don't know, I'm a sucker for sweet moments and build up to cause tension and the like. As a result, there won't be bedroom action for a while. I checked my plots for the other chapters and realized that something isn't going to happen as soon as I thought it would. Hopefully though, you'll be patient. I'll try to make it real nice and worth the wait._

 _Crystalbluefox : Honesty is the best policy. I have to be honest: my writer's blocks are very few in number, but when they happen, it takes me leaving the country to get a new idea. I'm not kidding. Went away for vacation, was stuck on something and then when I came back, I had like, 5 chapters written. My writer's block lasts long, but the moment it's over, it's like I'm making up for lost time and I have a thousand ideas._

 _Guest #2 : Yeah, last night I was looking at a comparison to Funimation and 4Kids. I felt like they killed anime._

 _Now my favourite lie? Had to be the one from Nessiebaby about how she's Sanji's wife from the future and then there was a wise spirit named ZoSan (the thing about their pairing name is that I think it would actually be a really awesome name for someone, don't you?) who told her that Sanji would be happiest with and I quote "this green headed dude". Yeah, that's my favourite._

 _Now for 2 questions, cause I realized that Zoro spoke French. AGAIN! My first question is: **what did Zoro say? YOU ARE NOT TO USE GOOGLE TRANSLATE!**_

 _Second question: at one point, Sanji says that he thinks that Rie Kugimiya could do better than voice tsunderes. Now the definition of tsunderes, according to me, is a character (usually female) who has a very stand-offish personality and has tendencies to be violent in nature, but when put in certain situations is surprisingly sweet and nice. **If you know any tsunderes, tell me their names and where they're from, and if you know more than one, tell me them all and then tell me which is your favourite.** (Because I do more than watch **One Piece, Bleach** and **Naruto** , I also watch shows like **Special A** and **Love Stage!** )_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	10. Rent

_**Author's Note** : So I don't own **One Piece** , still. And I really wanted to update this chapter soon since I'm like,"OH MY GOD, I'M IN DOUBLE DIGITS!" and the next chapter is going to be really fun to write. I also had a really fun time writing this chapter. Looking back at past chapters, I realize how many spelling mistakes and the occasional grammar mistakes there are. I am so sorry about them, I do my writing un-Betaed. I will fix these things, once the story is at a reasonable place. Also, Sanji went on a rant. More accurately, I went on a rant, so Sanji followed. I feel like this chapter really revealed a lot about him, quite personally. I believe we've fallen into routine so at the bottom there will be thanks for the reviews and a new question, as well as those who got what Zoro said right._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**_  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 10: Rent

* * *

How long had it been? Three months and a few days? Sanji and known the man for at least a hundred days and had been free-loading at his house— shit apartment for almost thirty when he realized something. Rent would have to be paid soon.

Sanji would never admit it aloud, but he was incredibly grateful for what Zoro had done, even if his methods of help weren't the most orthodox. Sanji would also never admit that Zoro was probably right. He would've run away at some point, but he knew that Patty or Carne would've caught him and it was punishment he would get for running away that kept him from leaving. That and Zeff. But Zoro didn't have to know that.

Sanji hadn't worked in almost a month and it was annoying him.

His hands started fidgeting and his eye began to twitch. He couldn't handle being forced to stay in Zoro's apartment on his own, with no entertainment other than shitty TV. Though Sanji was no longer at the mercy of those bastard cooks, he was no better on lock-down inside the large apartment that Sanji was still expecting some pretty woman to walk through the door of and demand why the hell Sanji was wearing her apron. There was no way a man as good-looking as Zoro was single. There was no way that a man that good-looking, with that amount of muscle, with that large of a bed could be single.

It was bugging him. If he was in Zoro's apartment and he wasn't allowed to leave, there were very few things to do. This meant that Sanji spent half of his time on the internet, looking up savate, since he had to admit, Zoro and Usopp had gotten his attention, and on the occasion, he'd surf through the occasional cat memes. Yes, he was _that_ bored.

While he was in the middle of watching a cat play with a ball of yarn, he heard the door open. He immediately jumped and spun around, to see Zoro smirking.

"Did I catch you in the middle of something?" he asked.

"Middle of what?" Sanji demanded, uncertain if he wanted to know the answer.

"Were you …?" Zoro trailed off.

"Was I …?"

Zoro blushed and turned his head away. "Never mind."

"No, you brought it up, what is it?" Sanji pressed.

"It's nothing!"

Sanji raised an eyebrow disbelievingly.

Zoro sighed. "I was asking if you were umph," said Zoro through his hand.

"If I was what?"

"If you were masturbating, okay?!"

Sanji took a step back in shock. Had Zoro just … Suddenly— well, not so suddenly to the blond— Sanji found himself laughing. Zoro stared at him as though he were utterly insane before crossing his arms in a huff.

"Ha ha," Zoro muttered. "Glad to know I amuse you."

"It's not that," Sanji said. "It's just … who calls it masturbating these days?" He let out a light chuckle. "Didn't know you were so old school, Marimo."

"Shut up," snapped Zoro.

Sanji took a deep breath, letting the smoke fill his lungs. "So, how long am I going to be stuck here until I'm allowed to work again?"

Zoro dropped his gym bag and stared at Sanji, open mouthed. "What?"

"How long do you intend to keep me here before I'm allowed to go back to the Baratie? No doubt they noticed my absence." _More like they noticed they didn't have anything to hit when they got frustrated._ But Zoro didn't need to know that. "I'm a fantastic chef and as a result, others will notice when the meal is slightly different than usual. You can't honestly intend to keep me as your personal cook for life, do you?"

"The thought never even crossed my mind."

"Liar."

Zoro put his hands up. "Okay, you caught me." His tone suddenly went serious as his eyes narrowed. "But seriously, you want to work at the Baratie again? After what those bastards did to you? Don't you remember?"

Sanji tried to stop himself from shuddering, but he knew he was shaking.

 _Of course I remember, you dumbass! How could I forget what happened? No one forgets their first time, no matter how awful it is! You think I want to go back? The only reason I'm asking is because I'm going fucking insane in your boring-ass apartment that you call a home! You didn't have to abduct me, you didn't have to pretend you cared, but you did it anyway, didn't you, bastard? If I stay here any longer, I might actually start to feel really comfortable and God knows how well it works out once I feel like I have a fighting chance in life! You should've just left me alone, I'm not worth your pity!_

Sanji didn't dare say it aloud. He knew Zoro would give him a glare and tell him to fuck himself since apparently, for a negative person, Zoro hated it when Sanji was pessimistic. He decided not to read too much into that, though it would hardly change a thing if he did. He was used to disappointment, after all.

Zoro seemed to take Sanji's silence as an answer.

"You're not going back to the Baratie," Zoro told him with a firm glare. "I won't let you. You need to stay here at least until your mental health reaches a level that I'm satisfied with and when you're associating things like the word 'friend' with nothing and yet you have an answer for 'nakama', that's reason enough for me to hold you hostage!"

"So you admit this is hostage-holding!"

"Shut up!" It seemed that was Zoro's default answer when his mind went blank.

Zoro was a very easy person to read, surprisingly. He let his emotions get the better of him rather a lot and more often than not, even if he tried to shield his face of all emotions, his eyes would twitch or some other horrible habit he was probably unaware of gave him away.

"Okay, I won't ask to go back to the Baratie—"

"And the cook sees sense!"

"—if you let me pay part of the rent."

Zoro's jaw dropped. Literally. It was quite funny. Sanji had thought you could only see that sort of shit in animes. The over-exaggerated expressions that lead to someone standing with their mouth hanging open for all the world to see was too comical and cartoonish to possibly happen in real life and yet Zoro's jaw wasn't closing. In fact, Sanji could count all of his teeth. Twenty-eight. Was that a normal amount of teeth?

Sanji could already tell that once Zoro got over the shock, he'd refuse, point-blank, that Sanji pay. But the green-haired man had to be nearly broke at this rate. The costly meals at the Baratie, the fact that he hadn't had a single competition in the last while also meant he was short on money. If what Nami said was true, then maybe he was earning money off those fights at that place … Partys, was it? But no, Zoro was strictly against gaining money from innocent people. Fuck, the man had to be broke!

"No way!" Zoro declared the moment he managed to gather his surroundings. "That's not happening," he insisted.

"If you think I'm short on money, I'm not," Sanji defended himself. "I'm an assistant cook, you think I'm yen-less?" He shook his head. "No, I'm sent to do groceries, I have to have some dough on me. When the head's out, I cover the costs to maintain the restaurant. Old geezer that he is hasn't shown up in a while, but I still get my pay. I can pay the rent for you, or at least we can each go half-way. It's the least I can do for free-loading."

Zoro shook his head. "First you think you've been kidnapped, then abducted. A few days later, you're fine with it but bring it up every time you disagree with me. Recently you think you're a hostage and now you're a free-loader?" Zoro sighed. "Don't ask me to understand you, it's too much for me."

"Of course your marimo brain can't wrap itself around it, but I _do_ have money. And since I haven't been able to leave this shitty apartment, I have even more money than usual. I know the ingredients I ask for aren't cheap and yet you insist on paying for them all. I want to help pay the rent, that's all. Why won't you let me?"

"I'm not a charity case!" Zoro snapped.

"You can barely afford to keep two people under this shitty roof, get over your damn pride, shitty swordsman, as tough as that must be for you, and let me help out, okay? I don't offer a helping hand often, you should be flattered I'm even persisting this much."

"You're a stubborn little asshole, aren't you?" Zoro demanded. "Either way, I won't accept your money."

"Get over your damn pride, bastard!" Sanji snapped.

God, he tried to do something nice and the asshole wouldn't let him! Sanji hadn't asked for Zoro's help. He hadn't asked to be taken from the kitchen and brought to his home. He didn't beg Zoro to put a secure roof over his head, to get him away from those bastard cooks. He didn't tell Zoro a sob story so he could get sympathy and a secure environment. He didn't do a fucking thing to make Zoro think that he needed or wanted his help.

 _Lie._

 _He saw. He saw you that day, when you decided to risk being in the dinning hall. He saw the way Patty beat you. He saw and he got worried. He saw the scars on your wrists and he got scared. You told him yourself about those nightmares. You told him what they did to you, and even if you weren't the most clear about it, he's not as stupid as you think he is. He figured it out._

 _Sure, he cares, but **why** does he care?_

 _He's got no reason. No fucking reason at all to try and get into my head. He didn't need to pull a psychology stunt, but he did anyway. Why does he keep acting like he cares? Why is he so open? How come I know his blood type and his dexterity, never mind his sword style, whatever the hell Santoryu means. He doesn't know anything about me, besides my shitty choice in TV shows. How is he so trusting? There's something wrong with him! How can he just let someone in without doing a background check or anything? He never presses, at least, not enough. When I say to drop the conversation, he does. Why the fuck does he do that? He wants to know, I know he does. So why the fuck doesn't he ask?_

 _Because he knows you'll be uncomfortable._

 _Fuck, he's being nice for the sake of my comfort? What the hell?! Who is this sick bastard? What does he want from me? He has to want something, everyone wants something in return for acts of kindness as big as this idiot's. No one takes someone under their wing, gives them free food and a place to stay, introduces them to their friends and comforts them after nightmares, no one tries to understand someone for the sake of wanting to know more! There has to be more, there has to be!_

 _Wait. Is he trying to lure me into a sense of security? Is that his goal? Does he think if I feel safe, I'm more bendable? Is he trying to get me to trust him? So that he cut my throat in the middle of the night? Is he planning something? Maybe that vacant look of not understanding is just an act?_

Zoro scratched his head and tilted his head slightly. "Well?" he pressed.

 _Scratch that. No one can fake that level of stupidity._

"I still want to pay," Sanji insisted. He was just getting paranoid that he was coming up with such ridiculous ideas and circumstances.

"Fuck you, ungrateful bastard!"

"The only reason why I'm doing this is _because_ I'm grateful, asshole!" Sanji snapped. He lit up another cigarette, taking his time in letting the smoke float around in his lungs. He didn't care about risks, he was sure some place in his mind, very minor, was hoping that lung cancer would come and kill him in his sleep. Quick, fast, painless. But looking at Zoro, he suddenly wished his body was as clean and fresh of contaminants as possible.

What if Zoro was his saviour? What if he was the one who Sanji needed to pull him out of the darkness?

He had already convinced Sanji that there as a light at the end of the tunnel. As much as Sanji wanted to deny it, the swordsman was giving something he had never dared to let build.

Hope.

God he sounded like a fucking pussy thinking like that.

"Do what you want," Sanji snapped, turning his back from Zoro. "Just know that in the end, I'm going to find a way to pay the rent and you can't stop me."

There was a huff from Zoro and the opening of the door. "I'm going to Luffy's," Zoro declared. "If I stay here any longer, I'll punch your obnoxious face in."

Sanji let out a breath, watching the smoke swirl around in the air. Toxic. That's what nicotine was. It was toxic for the system, brain cells and every part of him. Having started smoking early on in his life, Sanji was surprised it hadn't killed him yet.

 _Toxic. Just like me._

* * *

Zoro had been gone for two hours when Sanji felt the guilt sink in.

Maybe Zoro wasn't the villain Sanji's mind was convinced on posing him as. Maybe Zoro didn't have a long black cape that hid him in the shadows of darkness and he didn't go out murdering people for the heck of it. Maybe he wasn't some lunatic swordsman who fought with a million swords and cut people down in mere seconds. Besides, how sharp could his blades be if he fought kendo? They were wooden swords, there was no danger in it, right?

Sanji sighed.

He was going to have to admit it. Zoro had simply been trying to be nice for the sake of being nice.

 _God, it's a pain to admit you're wrong._

And Sanji had acted like an asshole. Fuck.

But instead of feeling vulnerable for admitting he was wrong, instead of feeling embarrassed for having acted in such a childish manner, instead of feeling weak for accepting one's help, he didn't feel anything like that. Not even close. He didn't feel as though he had broken or surrendered in admitting that maybe someone cared. He didn't feel as though he wasn't able to breathe, knowing someone saw him weak and gave him sympathy in return.

Because what Zoro did wasn't sympathetic.

What Zoro did was confrontational. He had seen a problem and after attempting to speak to him about, he had taken action. Nothing Zoro had ever done made Sanji feel as though he was being looked down upon. Nothing Zoro ever did made Sanji feel as though he was being pitied. Zoro looked after him in a way that was so open and yet so discreet at the same time, he didn't even know how to describe it. He'd almost call it what Zeff did, but that wasn't right.

Zoro didn't force him to get back up when he was down, he didn't teach Sanji to stand on both feet. He didn't teach Sanji that being weak was being defeated. Though these were things that helped Sanji push himself forward during those horrible nights, that wasn't what Sanji was given by Zoro. Zoro taught him the complete opposite. It was okay to need to recuperate. You weren't weak because you had been winded, you were strong because you acknowledged you needed that time to wait and recover before standing up again. It was being defeated and standing up again that made you strong, not refusing to be beaten until you couldn't stand. It was admitting you weren't good enough, but having the determination to get stronger and look at the "defeat" as a positive thing. As a lesson.

Zoro taught Sanji that it was okay to have to catch your breath. No one was going to shun you because you couldn't always keep up. Zoro had seen Sanji cry before. Sanji didn't like it, but he knew he had been crying on some occasions during those nightmares. Zoro never pointed it out, never called him weak because of it. Sanji remembered a saying he had once heard from Zeff.

 _"People cry not because they're weak. It's because they've been strong for too long."_

Zeff had laughed at it, saying that maybe that was true, but maybe they were just cry-babies.

Zoro made Sanji believe in it. Maybe Sanji _had_ been trying to stand on his own for too long. Maybe he _had_ been trying to fight a losing battle and came out scarred and bruised. Maybe he was hopeless at the current moment, but that didn't make him weak. That didn't make him any less respectable. That didn't make him any less _strong_.

But the question now was how did one repay kindness? How did Sanji deal with someone caring for him? And besides, maybe this was one of those macho things that Sanji just never understood, maybe Zoro didn't _want_ to be thanked for what he did, maybe he just wanted to pretend it was part of his character that very few people saw and just keep up the whole "tall, dark and handsome" appeal. It certainly worked.

How did Sanji repay Zeff in a way that didn't offend him? How did he tell him he was grateful without insulting him? How did Sanji show gratitude without seeming weak? Without showing too much? When was the last time Sanji had something to be grateful for?

He knew what to do.

He just hoped Zoro appreciated it.

* * *

Sanji had never attempted to make anything like this before in his life. No, that was a lie. He had tried to do it once about three or four years ago. Zeff had stared at the plate and spat in his face about it. Sanji wasn't sure if he could handle Zoro's reaction if it was anything like the old man's.

When Zoro came in through the front door, Sanji held his breath.

The swordsman was sweaty, his clothes wet and he was dragging his feet, obviously tired. He dropped his bag onto the floor and carefully put down— was that _three_ sheaths? on the couch gently. He then proceed to collapse on the couch, kicking his feet up onto the coffee table.

 _Hey, Marimo, take notice to the atmosphere, would you?_

Suddenly, Zoro's head perked up, his nose up in the air as he smelt his surroundings. "What is that?"

Sanji took a deep breath, unsure of what to say.

"Curly Brow, what is that?" he repeated.

He wasn't going to be a bastard. Just because he was anxiously anticipating a reaction towards the meal and just cause he had spent the better part of three hours working on it didn't mean he had to be an asshole about this. He could be calm, he could be rational.

"Food."

 _And the asshole takes over. Smart Sanji, smart._

Sanji shook his head, trying to kill the voice in the back of his mind. "I um, figured you'd be hungry, you've been away for a while and you look tired. Thought I'd make something."

"You always make something," Zoro pointed out, getting up from the couch and walking towards the kitchen, his steps slow, his feet dragging against the hard-wood floor. When he entered the kitchen, he froze. "What the fuck?"

Sanji chewed the tip of his cigarette, on edge.

The table was set with various different dishes, some of which Zoro knew of, some of which Zoro didn't. It was like a feast of some of the greatest delicacies that Sanji knew how to cook and some he had learnt online through shitty recipes. He had tasted just about everything beforehand, but then again, his tastebuds and Zoro's weren't the same, were they? Perhaps something Sanji thought was presentable was too spicy to the Marimo, or something else along those lines. He waited, trying not to hold his breath.

"What is this?" asked Zoro.

"Food."

 _Again with the asshole comments. I should just sew my mouth shut, shouldn't I?_

"I can see that, cook," Zoro said. "I mean why is there so much?"

"Thought you'd be hungry."

"Shit, Sanji, this is like a meal fit for a king!" Zoro said, flabbergasted.

"I know, so you should be glad I'm giving it to you, Marimo."

That was it. Sanji had decided it. He was never to open his mouth around the green-haired swordsman ever again, lest he say something even more stupid.

Zoro took a seat at the table and stared at it. "How long … how long did this take you to make?"

"Not long," Sanji lied.

"Liar," Zoro called him out on it.

"Just a couple of hours," Sanji corrected himself. He didn't want the idiot to think he had spent his whole day in the kitchen for him, even if that was the case. Something about him knowing just how much time and thought he had put into the meal before him made it too intimate for Sanji to handle so instead, he chewed a bit harder on his cigarette.

"A couple of hours?" Zoro repeated. "Don't just blow it off like it's nothing," he said. "That's … that's serious dedication. What's the occasion?"

"I can't do something cause I want to anymore? What happened to being a free country?" Sanji snapped.

He had just done what he considered a big gesture to Zoro and he himself was ruining it by saying such idiotic things. He needed to learn to keep quiet before he sank into the floor with embarrassment. Or maybe that was best, now that he thought about it.

"I can't … I can't accept this…"

 _SMACK!_

Zoro fell out of his seat and hit the ground to see Sanji standing over him, letting his foot drop to the floor.

"What the hell was that for?"

"Just shut up and eat it," Sanji snapped. "Zoro."

Zoro stared at him.

"I didn't slave over a hot stove and oven for you to be an ass about it so shut up and eat up," Sanji snapped.

Zoro smirked. "And here I was thinking we had come to an understanding of some sort. You sure know how to ruin a kind gesture, eh, Curly Brow?"

Sanji snarled. "Get up."

Zoro did as told without complaint. He sat down once more and stared at the meal in front of him. " _Itadakimasu_ " was all he said before digging in. Sanji couldn't hold back a smirk at that.

Sanji wasn't going to lie. Zoro's table manners were still atrocious. He still wanted to cringe as he watched Zoro eat. He used his fork in an appalling way and the amount of noise he made while enjoying his meal was beyond disgusting. But Sanji saw the way Zoro's eyes widened when he ate something new. He saw the way he melted into his seat when he ate something incredibly satisfying and in the confines of his own apartment, Zoro didn't hold back moaning, tossing his head back and leaving his neck incredibly exposed.

Sanji wasn't sure why, but the slope of tanned skin that was now accessible to him sent a shiver down his spine that wasn't entirely unpleasant. "Good?" he teased.

"You know your cooking's amazing," Zoro grumbled, taking a deep gulp from his glass. He paused and swallowed, staring at Sanji strangely. "What is this?"

"Henri IV Dudognon Heritage Cognac Grande Champagne."

Zoro gave him a blank look.

"Champagne."

Zoro snorted. "Figured. It's just like you to make alcohol sound obnoxious." He pushed the glass away. "I'm trying to quit," he told Sanji. "I've been doing well, I don't want to relapse into bad habits."

Sanji shook his head. "Champagne isn't as strong as beer. At most, you might get a slight buzz. Or are you telling me you can't hold your liquor?" Sanji challenged, raising an eyebrow at him.

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Don't tempt me."

"Fine, don't drink the champagne," Sanji said. "But at least let me do one thing and then you can spill the expensive stuff down the drain."

Zoro's eyes widened. "How expensive?"

"Wouldn't you want to know?"

Zoro sighed. "Fine, whatever. Do what you want."

Sanji poured himself a small amount of champagne into his glass. He raised it into the air and Zoro raised an eyebrow.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

"It's called a toast, Marimo," Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "You raise your glass to mine after I say what we're toasting to and clink glasses." He sighed. "Honestly, no class."

Zoro grumbled and raised his glass. "I don't see the point, but fine."

Sanji chewed his already well-bitten cigarette before taking a deep breath. "To new friendship."

Zoro stared at him shock but raised his glass all the same. The two glasses made a soft clinking sound before they both drank the contents of their glasses.

The silence was comfortable until Zoro broke it.

"You're still not paying rent."

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Now for the thanks!_

 _Dyloa : So hey, thanks for reviewing again! I've actually read **Fruits Basket** , a while ago. I thought it was relatively good. Nice art, not too boring of a plot-line, but what I couldn't stand was Tohru. Isn't that the way it usually is? The main characters have almost no personality and therefore, I lack sympathy and a bunch of other things. No wonder I like the Sohmas so much. (There are different ways of spelling it, I'll spell it the way I'm used to.) Of course I know **the Last Airbender,** are you kidding me? I used it as the basis for my original story, in terms of techniques that are used to harness elemental powers! I think you're right, Zuko is pretty tsundere, isn't he? My friend told me about **Tokyo Ghoul.** I just remember thinking it was the creepiest thing I had ever seen (I've seen creepier now) and I was surprised my sweet, innocent friend liked it so much._

 _JustCallMeLucie : Yup, I love development. Like, it's kinda crazy. As for the Baratie, very few questions were answered, but that's the point of having an ongoing story, isn't it?_

 _Eager Reader : Well I'm glad! I'm just a huge fan of development and I think fluffy bits are sweeter than just rushing to bed. I just want natural development, or as natural as possible considering the circumstances. I think the best relationships are the one that have time to grow instead of rushing into something quickly, which is why it's the way it is. I think this chapter though showed that something slightly more than platonic is starting, or at least, hinting at maybe the other men are more aware of each other than originally. I hope you liked it!_

 _lilcutieprincess : First I had to remember the read the names like Japanese names, and I'm glad you mentioned Aria, my friend showed me that anime to me and we were like, "Oh my God, she's kickass!". As for Misaki, I showed her to a friend once (mainly it was the scene where she got drunk and was in the nurse office with Usui, they got a real kick out of that) and I really liked her. I don't know many tsunderes, apparently, cause I don't recognize like half of these people! Every time I think I know my anime, something goes to prove me wrong._

 _Kpuffs : Have I seen **Junjo Romantica**? I feel like laughing right now. God, I love that show! I've also seen **Sekai-ichi Hatsuko** and I love them both, so much! You don't understand, I love that author! Which couple is your favourite? I have to say that Hiro-san and Nowaki make for the most dysfunctional (well, in a sense. They really need communication), but everything about the **Junjo Terrorist** couple made me squeal. Of course I like Misaki and Usagi, but I just remember thinking "MISAKI'S BARELY LEGAL!"._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : Of course Sanji's pessimistic in this story, I can't really blame him for it, can I?_

 _Okay, so first is what Zoro said, and then who got it right, then I'll tell you MY list of tsunderes, and then I'll ask you one more question, if you're still with me!_

 _First, Zoro said, **"Really? You're too dramatic, aren't you?"** which means that **lilcutieprincess** and **Eager Reader** got it right! And symbolically, so did **Dyloa**. So yay for you guys!_

 _Now my list of tsunderes (I am using their names written the way normal English names are written and the titles come from their English translations)._

 _Akira Toudou, from **Special A.** I seriously think she's a tsundere, at least in a certain sense if you look at her relationship with Tadashi. Another couple that had me giggling like an idiot._

 _Zero Kiryu from **Vampire Knight**. I was surprised no one put him, but considering the short time I gave for an answer and vampires aren't everyone's cup of tea (I don't really like **Vampire Knight** either, to be honest), I guess I shouldn't be TOO surprised._

 _Aria Kanzaki from **Aria The Scarlet Amo**. Do I even need to explain her? She's just ... I don't have words, but she's awesome._

 _Taiga Aisaka from **Toradora!** Okay, so guess what? This little cute, adorably small girl is voiced by Rie Kugimiya. She's pretty aggressive. Broke into a guy's house to get back an empty envelope (which, to be fair, she thought she put her confession in) and she dented a lamppost through kicks alone. Well, with some help from Ryuuji._

 _Kyo Sohma from **Fruits Basket**. God I love this guy. My friend told me to watch **Fruits Basket** and the second she mentioned Kyo, I was like, "No fair! I'm in school, I can't watch!" And I was just anxiously awaiting his arrival and he did NOT disappoint. I love this guy, seriously. I would probably try to marry him if I could, but everyone wants to marry fictional characters, don't they?_

 _Misaki Ayuzawa from **Kaichou Wa Maid-Sama** (I'm used to saying it in Japanese), or **The President Is A Maid!** She's awesome. She kicks ass. She's not good with emotions. End of discussion._

 _Kazuha Toyama from **Detective Conan** (because I think the English name is stupid). She has tsundere-like qualities, seen with her strange relationship with Heiji. She's very aggressive and when it came to confessing, she was even awkward and adorable then too._

 _Hiroki Kamijou from **Junjo Romantica,** because he's adorable, needs to smile more and learn that punching someone into bed while they're sick is not the answer. But I love him anyway. Too bad he's gay..._

 _Hiyori from **Bleach**. I can't remember her last name, but she enjoys beating people up but has the occasional sweet moments. I really like her, personally. She's very ... cool in my book, I suppose you could say._

 _Gu Jun-pyo/ Manik Malhotra/Domyouji Tsukasa from **Boys Over Flowers.** It doesn't matter which version he is, he's incredibly tsundere-like. Seriously, watch it and you'll see. He does stuff like torture this girl, but once he decides he likes her, he asks her out a date (which she never officially agrees to) and waits in the cold for like, 5 hours. (The Korean version has him in the snow, the Japanese in the rain) He told her not to be late and yet for a date that wasn't guaranteed, he waited 5 hours. God, I want to squeal just thinking about it._

 _Sasuke Uchiha from **Naruto**. I at least like to think he's a tsundere, cause I absolutely think he's one of the most huggable psychopaths in the world. That could be just me. Screw Itachi, I like Sasuke. His name also sounds cooler (in my opinion)._

 _Inuyasha from **Inuyasha**. Yes, he's on here. Because he's totally like a tsundere to me. Like, totally. Because he's mostly yelling or getting angry at people but then he has these really sweet moments that are somewhat warped and shouldn't necessarily be sweet, but they are because he's him, like when he turned human and told Kagome she smelled nice or how he always has an aggressive, unorthodox way of showing he cares._

 _Takafumi Yokozawa from **Sekai Ichi Hatsukoi/The Greatest First Love.** He's totally a tsundere in my opinion. He acts really tough and all and he's pretty harsh to others, but if anyone's seen the anime film of him, he's probably one of the most adorable people ever. I never pictured him being an uke though ..._

 _I just realized I said that tsunderes are usually female. I just listed 6 females tsunderes and 7 male tsunderes. I guess they're almost even. At least, in my mind._

 _I think that's all my tsunderes that I can think of right now, but yeah. Now for my question:_

 ** _What's your favourite yaoi (gay) pairing from anime (canon, or non-canon) besides Zoro and Sanji?_**

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	11. Everyone Was Sword-Fighting

_**Author's Note:** So I don't own **Hetalia** , **Treasure Island** or **One Piece**. I'll be dreadfully honest. This chapter wasn't exactly meant to be this long. I swear. Also, the next chapter is going to be considerably shorter than this by like, a lot. But after that, the chapters should be around this length, about maybe 7000 thousand words? This chapter is almost 9000 words. Yup, I wrote that much. This chapter was one I was really looking forward to, cause it was probably one of the most fun chapters to write. I made the kendo part of this short (and the title is in reference to the kendo match that was perhaps 500 words at most?) because I know like, nothing about kendo. I also used a lot of vocabulary words, I have a glossary, no worries though! Sorry that it's a big glossary, I wanted to sound smart. I used wikipedia a lot. I'm sorry if I offend anyone who does compete in kendo. I'm also not the best at fight scenes either, but I tried really hard! As always, I will be thanking you for reviews at the bottom and asking you a question. Well, actually, two questions this time._

 _Before we get to the glossary, I will explain how a kendo match works. I'm not good at doing this, I also think I butchered the sport and feel REALLY bad about it, you have no idea. I've seen Bleach in which one filler episode had a few people on a single team in kendo and they each scored a point to win. In this story's case, it's a one on one match. Now the way it works is there are 3 referees, all of whom hold two flags. One of white and one is red. When a point is awarded, that means two or more referees agree that the point was deserved. To award a point, a referee raises the flag corresponding to the colour of the ribbon worn by the scoring competitor. Kendo is a three-point match. I know that matches aren't this short, I'm just trying to lessen the horribleness of my writing kendo, to spare you all. Also, sorry for the overuse of vocabulary._

 _Bōgu : protective armour worn by kendo competitors, or anyone practicing kendo  
Shinpan: the name of a referee for a kendo match. There are usually three of them._  
 _Hakama : garment separated in the middle to form two wide trouser legs. If you've ever seen **Inuyasha** , you know what this is._  
 _Shinai : the kind of sword people use in kendo. Basically, it's a kind of wooden sword._  
 _Katsugi-waza : an attack technique that provides a surprise attack, by lifting the shinai over your shoulder before striking._  
 _Tobikomi-waza: This is a technique used when one's opponent has weak kisei (spirit, vigour) or when they yield an opening under pressure. Strike quickly. This is also under shikake-waza._  
 _Shikake-waza : I guess you could call it the technique category the katsugi-waza is under._  
 _Datotsu-bui: point scoring targets on the body_  
 _Men-bu : the top or sides of the head protector (sho-men and sayu-men)._  
 _Oji-waza : counter-attack techniques_  
 _Nuki-waza : a type of counter-attack where after avoiding an attack, you immediately strike back. Timing is really important in this case._  
 _Debana-waza : This technique involves striking your opponent as you realise he/she is about to strike. This is because their concentration will be on striking and their posture will have no flexibility to respond._  
 _Hikibana-waza: Body and shinai will lose balance as you strike or when being attacked. This technique takes advantage of this to help execute a strike._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 11: Everyone Was Sword-Fighting

* * *

Zoro realized that spending almost a month and a half inside a "shitty apartment" as Sanji put it would drive anyone insane so that was the reason why the blond was now sitting in the stands as Zoro sized up his newest opponent.

Yes, Zoro had brought Sanji to a kendo match.

Zoro had learnt that Sanji had never seen a kendo match before since he didn't watch TV and the cook had concluded that kendo was a sport in which men grunted and smacked each other with wooden sticks. Zoro told him he had to see it to understand what it was like and then practically shoved the ticket to him, telling him that he was coming whether or not he wanted to so Luffy was going to pick him up at six and he'd better not be late.

Only Sanji would turn up to a kendo tournament wearing something as stylish as a suit. Idiot didn't understand that no one really cared what you looked like when the competitors were wearing bōgu. Finding the man amongst the many spectators was not hard when his blond hair stood out amongst the sea of dark, even if he wasn't wearing the suit.

His opponent, Cabaji, was known to be a rather … _eccentric_ man who enjoyed playing tricks on his opponent before a match and often during. Today though it was almost certain he'd play fair seeing as there were over a thousand spectators and the shinpans had keen eyes, as proven by other matches they had refereed.

Before the match had begun, the man had already tried to light Zoro's hakama on fire. Zoro had decided since it was Sanji's first ever match (that he saw at least), he wouldn't mention it to anyone. It wasn't like Cabaji had succeeded anyway and Zoro wouldn't be intimidated by something that pathetic.

One of the refs raised an arm and told them they may begin.

It was perhaps two seconds before everything as over. Using the katsugi-waza manoeuvre to quickly gain a point, Zoro struck down on his opposition.

The entire crowd erupted in cheers as the three referees raised a red flag.

 _A direct men-bu strike so early on? This guy isn't that big of a deal, is he?_

The second round started and Zoro's eyes wandered to the crowd for a brief moment. They landed on the cook, who was leaning in his seat, trying to get a better look. _Baka, you're in the best seats of the house. Luffy, I'm trusting you to make sure he doesn't fall over_. He seemed amazed by the competition, as though he had never seen such a fight before when Zoro remembered he hadn't.

Cabaji made an attempt at a tobikomi-waza, but he wasn't fast enough. S _eriously, does this guy practice any of his shikake-waza?_ Zoro made a quick nuki-waza and once again, all three referees declared him the winner of another point. _He leaves his datotsu-bui so open, no wonder he's easy to beat. I can understand why he uses cheap tactics to catch the other off-guard, but sideshows won't work on me._

The third and final round started.

Right when Cabaji made an attempt to use a hikibana-waza, Zoro countered with debana-waza, thus winning the match.

 _God, that was boring, hope Sanji didn't fall asleep._

* * *

"Zoro!"

The green-haired man turned at the sound of his name and was almost instantly enveloped by Luffy's arms as he hugged him tightly. "That was a great match!" the dark haired man said with a laugh. "Really!"

"It was short," Zoro told him. Trying not to seem too anxious, Zoro looked around. Nami was coming forth, rolling her eyes and wearing that expression that said quite clearly, "my boyfriend's an idiot, but I have no one to blame but myself", with a bouquet of flowers for Zoro. Honestly, flowers made him look so … _un-masculine_. If that was a word. Probably not though. Usopp was busy talking to one of the other competitors, probably saying some big-ass lie about how he was a kendo champ, back in the day and the most fearsome competitors feared the name of the Great Usopp. "Um, Luffy, where's—"

"Sanji?" Luffy finished for him.

Zoro tried not to blush. Was it that obvious he was looking for the cook?

"He's still in the stands. I think he's in shock," Luffy supplied. He gave Zoro a knowing look that the swordsman didn't even know his idiotic friend had. "You wanna see him?"

Zoro shook his head. "No, I was just—"

"Zoro, it's okay to want to talk to him," Luffy cut him off. "Me and Nami will wait, alright? And Usopp's pretty busy, talking to that big guy, he'll hardly realize you're gone."

"Nami and I," Zoro corrected. He wasn't sure why, but when he got overly-anxious, he tended to be a grammar Nazi. He didn't even like grammar and what reason did he have to be nervous? It was just Sanji!

Luffy rolled his eyes. "Okay big guy." He pat Zoro on the shoulder. "We'll be waiting, alright?"

"Yeah, sure," Zoro replied in a distracted voice.

His feet didn't seem to move fast enough, or slow enough for that matter. Each step he took was at a normal pace and yet his mind told him it was taking forever while at the same time, informing him he was walking too quickly. In actuality, his strides were his normal, relaxed ones, but his mind was on an entirely different planet.

What if Sanji hadn't liked the match? It had been brief, there was hardly any time to watch an impressive showdown. What if he turned Sanji against kendo forever? Not that it really mattered since the cook didn't seem to take much interest in Zoro's personal life in the first place, but what if he was now living with someone who had something against his career? Dammit, what the fuck was he thinking?

When he finally got into the arena again, he saw Sanji right away.

The blond was sitting on a bench, his hands on his knees, staring at the matts on which the "battle" had taken place. He seemed to be mumbling to himself, random words that weren't coherent thoughts and as Zoro approached him, he wondered if he was approaching a wild animal. Unpredictable and able to attack at any moment.

Surprisingly, it wasn't until Zoro took a seat next to Sanji and cleared his throat that the cook realized he was there.

When he did though—

 _SMACK!_

"Fuck, you need to stop doing that!" Zoro said, holding his cheek. Wasn't that the place the insane cook had first struck him on the day at the Baratie? Well, now wasn't the time for nostalgia.

Sanji immediately jumped up from where he had been sitting and covered his mouth in surprise. "Shit, does it hurt?" he asked, his brow creasing in what Zoro hoped was concern. He _did_ say they were friends, after all. "It's a reflex."

"Does it hurt?" Zoro repeated. " _Does it hurt?_ " He shook his head. "Oh no, I've gotten so used to getting kicked in the face, I've developed an immunity to pain! A high tolerance towards crazy black boots striking me out of nowhere, I don't even notice anymore! Hell, I've become fucking numb to it!" The sad thing was he was telling the truth. With a sigh, he turned to Sanji. "Okay, now that you've smacked me with your foot, wanna tell me why you're here when everyone else is over there?" He gestured with his thumb towards the changing rooms, where several people whom had their matches before Zoro's were being congratulated.

"I have an uncannily horrible sense of direction?" Sanji offered.

Zoro shook his head. "Come on cook, talk."

Sanji was quiet for a while, staring around the arena once more. "I look fucking ridiculous, don't I?"

"To the average person? No. To a room filled with kendo fans? Hell yeah."

Sanji chuckled softly. "I didn't really come here willingly, you know. Your straw-hat friend dragged me here," Sanji pointed out. "Threatened me with some talk with Nami. Apparently, she can get scary at times, though I don't understand how a woman that pretty can have as sharp of a tongue as Luffy claims."

For some unknown reason there was a twinge of _something_ in Zoro's stomach which he preferred not to name.

Zoro dug his foot into the ground, as though trying to dig a hole to China. China probably wasn't far enough though, but with its large population, maybe he'd blend in and not have to worry about hearing Sanji tell him that kendo was the bane of his existence. Who was he fucking kidding, he had green hair, there was no way anyone was going to miss that.

"They won't let me smoke in here," Sanji said with a frown.

"Second hand smoking is worse than first hand. With how much I let you smoke in my house, I won't be surprised if I die before you."

"It's not a house, it's a shit apartment," Sanji corrected him.

"How could I forget?"

There was silence and then the now-familiar sound of a lighter burning. He heard Sanji's satisfied sigh as he let out a puff of smoke. _Well, there's no one around so I suppose it can't hurt_ , Zoro thought to himself. He waited for Sanji to say something about the match, but he seemed to be dancing around the topic.

Fuck, he hated it, didn't he?

Zoro was about to apologize for wasting Sanji's time when the blond spoke again.

"You know, when I thought I'd be leaving the house for the first time, I didn't think it'd be because I was being forced to go to some sport event." Sanji took a deep breath and Zoro stayed silent, waiting for the blond to pass judgment on Zoro's career. "They don't record the matches, do they? Like the way they'll record a basketball game and put it on TV?"

"What, you think kendo isn't worthy of being televised?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, it's not that. It's just that in games like basketball or baseball, they have a couple of moments where the cameras scan the crowds, right? Do like a wave-shot or something. If that tape gets on TV …"

Zoro realized Sanji's concern. If the tape was let out to the public, that would mean that Sanji would be on it. No doubt the Baratie was wondering where the fuck he was and they probably hadn't forgotten about Zoro. To see Sanji— who stuck out like a sore thumb— at a kendo match where Zoro was competing? That couldn't just be a coincidence. The cooks could find him, couldn't they?

Zoro felt his heart race. Fuck, he had screwed up. Now the cooks were going to hunt Sanji down and find him. They were going to take him away from Zoro— wait. Why did his stomach clench at the thought? Why did he see red when he thought of Sanji being taken away from him? It didn't make sense. Zoro shook his head and instead took a deep breath, trying to clear his mind. For the first time in his life, he actually itched for a cigarette. It seemed to calm Sanji down a lot, maybe it'd work for him too? _Fuck, he's rubbing off on me._

"I'm so sorry," Zoro said, launching himself into an apology when Sanji said something that surprised him.

"I think I just made a fucking fool of myself on TV."

Zoro gave him a strange look.

Were he and Sanji not thinking of the same thing? If Zoro was worrying about the cooks finding Sanji, what was Sanji thinking about? What did he mean making a fool out of himself on TV? Sure, he looked stupid in his suit and tie but that didn't mean anything, at least, not to Zoro, so what was the blond going on about?

"I think I might have actually fallen out of my seat at one point," Sanji admitted. He looked away from Zoro as he said this. "I saw the whole competition, you know. All the others who were fighting too. Your match had to be the shortest one." Sanji smirked. "Don't let it go to your head, Marimo, but you were pretty fucking incredible."

Zoro's jaw dropped.

Sanji's smirk only widened.

"Huh?"

"You're not very bright, are you?" Sanji asked. "I hate to admit it, but I think I nearly pissed myself in excitement. Luffy was the only thing stopping me from randomly jumping up and screaming. Nami stepped on my heels so I wouldn't kick him off," he added. "Smart woman, knowing I'd never hit a lady." He gave Zoro a strange look. "What are you apologizing for? That was probably the most fun I've ever had."

Zoro couldn't seem to formulate words. Instead, he merely opened and closed his mouth once more.

"I've worked at the Baratie for a long time. Since I was about nine, I think. Where I lived before that … well, they didn't really do things like take kids out to the movies. You've seen the cooks. They're not the kind of people who'll bring you to a carnival and hold your hand on the big scary rides. I've never been to anything like this before. I … I had a good time."

It took a while for Zoro to realize what had just happened.

Sanji had just revealed more about himself in the past five minutes than he had ever revealed in the four months Zoro had known him. And— was the blond blushing? His cheeks were pale to begin with and there was no denying the slightly pink colour that arose as he turned his head away.

Sanji had had fun?

Zoro couldn't help but feel accomplished.

"You have real swords, though, don't you? Like, swords besides shinais," Sanji said, breaking the silence and changing the topic. It was abrupt and sudden, but Zoro didn't practically mind. He liked talking to this Sanji, the one who was unguarded, or at least, a little less on the defensive. "Wado, that was the one you nearly killed me with the first night, right?"

"Wado Ichimonji," Zoro said softly. "Yeah."

"Where'd you get it? It looked expensive."

Zoro decided that if Sanji had decided to share a little bit of himself, Zoro could too. And what better way to let Sanji know about him than through his swords? "She was a gift, from a friend of mine." Zoro tried not to think about it too much. It had been a few years but still, the memory stung. He was getting better at remembering her without too much pain, but that didn't make living without her any easier.

"It looked a bit feminine," Sanji said. "White and all."

"You sexist?" Zoro asked.

Sanji shook his head. "Me? Never!" And while from anyone else it would've sounded sarcastic, it sounded genuine from Sanji.

"To be fair," Zoro said, "Wado belonged to my friend who was female."

Sanji stared at him. "Was?"

Zoro nodded and stared ahead of him. "She … died a while ago." He tried not to choke up on his words, but he could still feel his vision blurring slightly.

Sanji cleared his throat. "So if you have a sword like that, you have to use it somewhere, right? It looked recently used and everything. You take good care of your swords." He paused. "You don't go out killing people with them, do you?"

Zoro let out a laugh. "No, I don't. I just fight with them."

"Fight?" Sanji repeated.

"Yeah," Zoro said. "It's still pretty early, ten and all. You wanna go somewhere?"

Sanji looked at him. "You're going to let me out of the house to two different locations in one night? Is it my birthday?"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Shut up, do you want to go or not?"

Sanji gave him a soft smile, something Zoro had never seen before. It was … refreshing? Fascinating? Surprising? It was certainly and most definitely _not_ beautiful. Nope. No way did he find the cook looked beautiful under the stadium lights, shining off his golden hair, making him look beautifully handsome and stunning and— no. No.

"Sure."

God, was this man trying to kill him? The way he spoke this time, he kept the same baritone but the way the word slipped out of his lips almost sounded … seductive. It was strange, it was weird and Zoro didn't like to think too much about it. Instead, he held out a hand for Sanji. "Get up, we're going."

Sanji ignored his hand and stood up on his own, dusting off his pants. This showed Zoro something, whether or not he liked or believed in psychology. Maybe Sanji had opened up to him a bit more, but he still didn't trust him enough to lean on him.

"Shot gun."

Zoro was brought out of his strange psychoanalysis-daze by Sanji's words.

"What do you mean shot gun?" Zoro demanded. "It's my car!"

"And you'll get lost, which is why I'm going to find out where we're going and drive us there because you're shit when it comes to directions," Sanji declared. He ruffled Zoro's hair while the swordsman crossed his arms and his lips almost formed a pout, but didn't because Zoro Roronoa is above pouting. He didn't think about how Sanji's hands felt in his hair. Nope. Not at all.

"Luffy was your ride here— oh shit, Luffy!" Immediately, Zoro's eyes flew towards the direction of the changing rooms where Luffy, Nami and Usopp were exiting.

Luffy didn't seem upset in the least, despite the fact that Zoro had completely forgotten about his existence, which wasn't easy, considering how noisy and loud he was. He gave Zoro his giant smile and laughed. "So we're going to Partys?"

* * *

"What kind of place is it?" Sanji asked from the driver's seat as Zoro sat in the passenger seat with a frown on his face. The bastard wouldn't let him drive his own damn car! How was that fucking fair?

Luffy had given Sanji the directions to Partys, much to Zoro's chagrin. The whole point of going there was to surprise Sanji, but if the cook now knew how to get there and the name of the place, it was hardly surprising, was it? Then again, Sanji didn't get out much. Maybe it could still be a surprise?

"Not telling," Zoro replied.

"Oh don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Act like you're a kicked puppy," Sanji replied. "Pouting doesn't suit you."

"I'm not pouting!" Zoro snapped.

Sanji smirked. "Sure you aren't."

Nami and Usopp were heading to Partys in Luffy's car, which he drove in front of Sanji, which made Zoro feel as though he were obligated to drive. If all he had to do was follow the straw hat's car, it wasn't that hard to find the place. Despite the various times Zoro had been there, he had yet to manage to get there without asking Luffy for directions and then having the dark haired man guide him to the bar through the phone. It was like Zoro's memory reset itself every time he got in the car, forcing him to forget route after route. The only route he had memorized was the one to the Baratie. It was a wonder he got to his matches on time.

They turned onto a different street.

"So … you won't tell me where we're going, even if I'm driving. That could be disastrous, I could end up driving us into a wall or something. Luffy makes really jerky turns you know."

"I know," Zoro said.

"How about we play a little game?" Sanji offered.

"If you think I'm going to play I Spy, you're out of your mind."

"No, not that. Have you ever played the Yes, No, Maybe game?"

"What do you do in your spare time?" Zoro asked, giving Sanji a strange look.

"Besides watching cat memes and _Hetalia_? Not much. Well, I look up _500 Things To Do When Bored,_ but I don't know how to be orange. Who would want to be orange anyway? It's an eyesore and covering yourself in Cheetos isn't exactly favourable."

"Was this one of those things on that list?"

"No," Sanji admitted. "I come up with games on the occasion. Anyway, the Yes, No, Maybe game works like this: I ask you a yes or no question. You can't say yes, no, or maybe. You can use any other way to reply, but you can't use it twice. Whoever screws up first loses. Fair enough?"

"Why should I play?"

"Because I'm bored and it seems like it's going to take a while."

Zoro sighed. "Fine. I suppose you can start."

"Are you gay?"

"WHAT?!"

There had been no hesitation with Sanji's question, none at all. Zoro knew for sure that he was a straight as a board, but Sanji seemed to laugh at his answer.

"Okay, you can't use that response again. Your turn. Ask me a question."

"What makes you think I'm gay?" Zoro demanded.

"That's not a yes or no question," Sanji told him. "You lose, I win."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "What kind of a question is that? _Are you gay?_ " Zoro mimicked him.

"Honestly," Sanji said with a sigh. "It's been like, four months at least. You'd think you'd get better at impersonating me, but really, I think you've gotten worse." He turned another corner. "That was question that's meant to trip up the other person, leave them baffled and allow me to win by default. Of course, it didn't work with that one customer who actually _was_ gay …" Sanji shook his head. "Play again?"

Zoro stared at Sanji in shock, unable to fathom an answer. First Luffy accused him of being gay, now Sanji? Seriously? Did he just leak pheromones or something?

"Fine," Zoro said with a sigh finally. "Since I've got nothing better to do. Who starts?"

"Well, since I won, you start. As the loser, I'll let you have the advantage of having the first chance to make me screw up."

Zoro didn't put much thought into his question. "Are _you_ gay?"

"Nope."

Sanji didn't even blink. "My turn. Do you have any other swords, besides Wado?"

Zoro tried not to fume too much at how unaffected Sanji seemed from his question. With gritted teeth, he said, "Definitely. Is black a colour?"

"To me it is. Is all of your hair green?"

"Perhaps. Have you ever fought in a real fight before?"

"Define the word 'fight'. Are you fluent in French?"

"More or less. Do you know any other languages besides Japanese?"

"Latin. Do you think Latin's dead?"

"Do you think Latin was ever alive?" Zoro shot back.

"Fair point. Are any of your parents French?"

"I have green hair, you think French people have green hair?"

"I've never been to France, so I don't know."

There was silence.

Then, they both started laughing.

The rest of the ride to Partys had the both of them playing Sanji's game, Yes, No, Maybe. The total score was three wins for Sanji, zero wins for Zoro. To be fair, the main reason Zoro kept losing was because he ended up running out of questions and it ended up taking him too long to answer. When the rounded the corner and Zoro finally found the street to be somewhat familiar, he felt a sense of dread in him. Did that mean the game was over?

"Okay, my turn," Sanji said. "Do you think I'm hot?"

"WHAT?!"

Sanji smirked. "You lose. You already gave me that answer when I asked you if you'd ever taken it up the ass. Is this the place?" he asked, looking up.

Partys Bar was like an old fashion pub that seemed slightly out of place amidst the modern architecture of Tokyo. Zoro had fallen in love with the place at first sight because it looked so modest and old-fashioned. Maybe Sanji was right, maybe Zoro did like things a little old school. He didn't know why, but whenever he walked into the bar he felt like he was returning to an extension of his family. It was like a big old reunion, one that didn't make him cringe when distant relatives pinched his cheeks and his annoying brat cousins asked him for the thousandth time whether or not his hair was actually green. He knew old fashioned suited him just fine, but he wasn't so sure about Sanji.

Zoro peeked at the blond out of the corner of his eye and bit his lip, anxiously awaiting his response.

"I thought you were trying to quit. Isn't this counter-productive?"

Well if that wasn't fucking vague, Zoro didn't know what was.

With a grunt, Zoro pushed open the door and got out, slamming it shut behind him. "Get out Curly Brow. Makino's going to like seeing a new face around here."

Sanji got out of the car and walked with Zoro into the bar.

The inside looked even more rustic than the exterior. It was like being thrown into the Wild West, or some kind of pirate era. There were barrels of beer and wooden tables, a pretty young lady standing behind the counter. Her grin widened when she spotted Zoro.

"Hey, Zoro, you here for a drink?"

"Trying to quit," Zoro reminded her.

"Who's your guest?" she asked, gesturing towards Sanji.

Sanji gave her a big smile and Zoro found he was back to faking it. He walked to the bar and leaned over the counter, taking Makino's hand in his. He gave her a quick kiss on the back of her hand. "Sanji," he introduced himself. "And who might you be?"

Makino raised an eyebrow at him. "You've got a charmer here, don't you?" She smiled. "I'm Makino, Partys' bartender."

Sanji nodded. "Enchanted."

"Come on, Curly Brow," Zoro said, taking Sanji's arm and pulling him away from the bar. "We aren't here for the booze." He turned to Makino and smiled. "The captain should be coming any second now, but could we go ahead, if you don't mind?"

Sanji gaped. "You have manners?"

Makino let out a light giggle. "I was shocked when I found out too, he doesn't look like the kind who uses 'please' and 'thank-you', does he?"

Sanji shook his head.

"Can we discuss my lack of manners later? He hasn't even seen anything yet," Zoro said, slightly impatient.

"And you're back to your old asshole self. Was I dreaming a few second ago?" Sanji teased.

"Shut up," Zoro snapped. "Anyway, can we, Makino?"

Makino nodded. "It's a bit crowded down there, but you should be fine. Did you bring your swords?"

"No," Zoro replied. "I'm not fighting tonight, but I thought maybe the cook would like to see what I get up to when I'm not at the gym."

Makino raised an eyebrow. "Really?" She gave Zoro a funny look, one he realized he recognized. _Oh God no, not her too._ "I never pictured you to go that way, but he seems to make you happy. It's been a while since you've put yourself out there, hasn't it?"

Zoro shook his head profusely. "No, I'm not— we're not …" For some reason, Zoro's tongue wouldn't work. He couldn't figure out what to say without sounding overly-flustered, which would cause the bartender to think that he was lying about the whole thing, which he wasn't. He didn't even think about it!

"Haven't seen you this tongue-tied since you got into fights with her," Makino said, this time her smile turning a tad sad. "So who'll be fighting tonight then, if not you?"

"Luffy."

Makino nodded. "Well, I think your captain's going to be a bit disappointed, we don't have that strong of a bunch tonight. You guys might've scared them all off."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Can we go now?" he pressed, impatient.

Makino let out a laugh. "Okay, you can go down."

Zoro pulled Sanji along with him, the blond very confused as Zoro descended down the stairs of the bar towards the arena. Well, to Sanji he probably thought it was the wine cellar or something like that but boy was he in for a surprise.

It was loud down there, Zoro noted. Much louder than he remembered, but he hadn't been here in a while. It would take a while for his ears to adjust.

"Zoro, where are we going?" Sanji demanded, raising his voice at the sudden change in volume.

"We're going to watch a fight," Zoro replied.

"A fight? What are you talking about?" Sanji demanded.

Zoro stopped once they reached the bottom of the stairs where two bouncers stood with their arms crossed. They were wearing shades, though Zoro still had no idea why people insisted on wearing them indoors and were looking at a list on a clipboard. "Name?" the larger of the two asked.

"Come on, don't tell me you've forgotten me already?" Zoro teased.

"Name?" the man repeated.

"Zoro, why don't you just give them your name?" Sanji asked, confused. "They look like they want to squash us like a bug—"

"Zoro?" the smaller of the men said. "Roronoa, is that you?"

Zoro smirked as the two men looked up at him in surprise. "I haven't been gone that long, have I, boys?"

The two men's faces split into identical smiles. "Big Bro Zoro!" cried Yosaku with a big grin on his face. "You here to fight? I haven't seen you in ages!"

"Nope, not tonight's all Luffy's," Zoro said.

"And who's that?" asked Johnny, staring at Sanji strangely. "He looks a little scared."

Sanji turned bright red. "I am not, you tattooed asshole!" he shot back at Johnny.

Johnny took a step back. "Um, should we call security?"

"Aren't you security?" Zoro reminded them.

"Oh … yeah," Yosaku said. "Who's your friend, Big Bro?"

"This is—"

"I can talk for myself, bastard," Sanji snapped. He looked the two men in the eye and said, "Name's Sanji. Do you have names or am I just going to call you Dumb and Dumber?"

Johnny and Yosaku turned to each other.

"Did he just call me Dumb?" asked Yosaku.

"No, I think you're the one who he calls Dumber," said Johnny.

"Hey, you're dumber than me, dummy!" Yosaku shot back.

Sanji shook his head and Zoro could almost see him rolling his eyes in the dark light of the basement. "Never mind. You gonna let us in?" he asked the two bouncers who were still fighting with each other over who was dumber.

"Right, yeah, of course!" Yosaku said. "Come on in, Big Bro Sanji!"

Sanji stared at Yosaku strangely, but Zoro pulled him along so they entered the arena together.

"Okay," Zoro said in a loud voice over all the yelling. "You have to stick close to me, or else you'll probably get lost—"

"Shouldn't I be saying that to you?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You've never been here, you're easy prey," Zoro told him. "Everyone else here is at least a little scared of me, so I'll be fine, but they might pick on you, so I'd watch out. If you want to die in a mosh pit, be my guest, but don't say I didn't warn you."

"This isn't a mosh pit, idiot," Sanji told him, but Zoro noticed he didn't let go of Zoro's arm.

In the centre of the room, there was a large space that was cleared out. There were a bunch of tables that surrounded it and in the middle, there was currently two people fighting each other. Zoro knew the sight of it all was a bit overwhelming in the beginning, but he figured Sanji could adjust. That was why he had even bothered mentioning the place to him.

"Hey Zoro!"

Zoro nearly screamed when he felt Luffy wrap an arm around Zoro's shoulder. He began to lean on him and pat him on the back. "So, is there anyone good to fight around here? You offered me to fight, so it'd better be a work out."

"Your girlfriend's trying to cheat people out of their money again," Zoro told Luffy. "I'd be more concerned about keeping an eye on her than who your opponent's going to be."

Luffy shook his head. "Nah, Nami's good. I trust her."

Zoro gave him a look. "Don't you think you're a little _too_ trusting?"

Luffy shrugged. "Maybe. Hey Sanji, how do you like it here?" he asked, turning his attention towards the blond.

Sanji was watching the fight between the two men vigorously, his eyes catching every movement. Zoro had only ever seen him show this much concentration when he was cooking. Was he really that raptured by it?

"Hey Zoro," said Sanji, his voice sounding far away. "Can I fight Luffy?"

Zoro stared at him. _Does he have any idea what he just said?_ "Excuse me?"

"Yeah," Sanji said. "I dunno, seeing the kendo fight and watching these guys fight, I dunno, it makes me want to fight too. Kinda contagious, the energy going on around here." His eyes followed one of the men as they judo flipped the other on a table, causing it to break. "Besides, Luffy doesn't look like that much of a challenge."

"Sanji, Luffy has punches of steel," Zoro told him. "And besides, have you ever really gotten into a big fight before?"

"No, not really," Sanji replied. "But I kinda want to give it a try." He shrugged. "So can I?"

"Can you what?"

"Can I fight Luffy?"

Luffy let out a big laugh. "You think you can take me?" he asked Sanji, but he sounded good-natured about it. He was obviously teasing him but the gaze Sanji sent him made shivers run down Zoro's spine.

"No," Sanji replied. "I _know_ I can."

The entire room seemed to hear Sanji's bold words and acted accordingly. In translation, everyone said in unison, "Oooooooooh…"

"Oh grow up!" Zoro snapped at them all.

Luffy gave Sanji a smile. "I'm game if you are."

Zoro's eyes widened. Was Luffy serious? Taking on Sanji, who couldn't handle the cooks, in a fight? This was ridiculous. "Sanji, you don't know what you're asking for," he told him. "You don't seriously want to do this." It was better to go home with all your bones in tact rather than go home in a casket. At least, that's what Zoro figured.

"Don't worry Zoro, I'll go easy on him," Luffy assured him. "So? What do you say?"

Sanji chewed on his cigarette. "I want to fight you. But no holding back."

Luffy raised an eyebrow. "You sure about that?"

Sanji nodded. "Definitely."

"Sanji, wait, you don't want to—"

"Luffy against a newcomer?" came a new voice. Zoro looked and found the source. Of course it'd be Ace. Of course Luffy's brother would be here. The dark haired man looked Sanji up and down, as though sizing him up. "I'd pay to see that!"

Nami's eyes widened. "Really? How much? 20? 30?"

Ace looked at her strangely. "It's an expression, you know."

Nami looked slightly put out by this.

"I want to see what you've got," Ace declared, directing his words towards Sanji. "Luffy, you up for it?"

Luffy nodded. "Yeah, totally!"

Sanji turned to Zoro. "We just need your permission, Mom," he teased.

Zoro scowled. "Fine, if you want to go up against Luffy, fine, but I'm not taking care of your bruises!"

Sanji put a hand on Zoro's shoulder. "Hey, you said it yourself; I kick hard. I'll be fine."

For some reason, Zoro found this very reassuring.

Sanji took off his blazer and handed it to Zoro. "Hold onto that for me, would you?"

Zoro nodded, not that he had much of a choice and he held the blazer in his hands, staring at the golden buttons. He always wondered why it was that Sanji had golden buttons on his blazer. Maybe he'd ask about it later. While he was at it, when asking about his blazer, maybe he'd ask about those three scars on his thumb too. If Sanji was still in a talking mood, that is.

The other fight ended with the smaller guy winning. Zoro figured he used aikido.

"Okay, so how does this work?" asked Sanji, stepping into the area where the previous fight had been held. Normally, Zoro knew one would roll up their sleeves before starting a fight but then he remembered what Sanji's bare arms looked like. He felt sick thinking about them, not because he was disgusted, but because of what the cooks had driven Sanji to do.

"Simple," said Ace, standing up on a table. "Your fighting arena is the area surrounded by the tables. On the occasion, the fight goes out of the ring, but try to keep it inside. We don't want to make our tab any higher, got it?" he asked, sending Sanji a wink. "You'll fight until one of you surrenders, or until you can't go on. We, the crowd, determine whether or not you can go on. If you're down for more than ten seconds, then you're out. This is meant to be a fun brawl, so please avoid aiming for the throat or any other vital regions that are required for breathing. You'll start when I blow this whistle," Ace gestured toward the whistle around his neck. "And as for the rules, it's pretty easy. Anything other than going in for a killing blow is allowed. I suppose you could say there are no rules really. Simple enough, isn't it?"

Sanji nodded.

Zoro sat at a table that allowed him a good view of the ring, watching as Sanji and Luffy stared each other down from opposing sides of the arena.

"Alright. When I blow my whistle, we start," Ace declared.

"Three," the crowd crowd said in a murmur in unison. "Two. One."

 _TWEET!_

"FIGHT!"

Sanji walked around the ring with his hands in his pockets, the way an idiot would. Honestly, Zoro knew he wasn't ready to fight, why had he given in? Luffy reeled his arm back, ready to strike. Zoro nearly screamed out Sanji's name, to tell him to duck but when Luffy let go of his punch, Sanji leaned to the side slightly and dodged it easily.

 _What was that?_

Luffy stared at Sanji in confusion, before shaking his head to get himself out of a daze. He took another strike at him, but Sanji dodged. His movements were graceful and quick, perfectly timed. Luffy made a lunge forwards to punch Sanji in the gut, but Sanji avoided him with ease. The dark haired man made another attempts to strike him in the back, but then Sanji did something no one was expecting.

The blond jumped, spinning in the air. One of his legs came out and struck Luffy in the face harshly.

Luffy staggered back and rubbed his face, feeling the bruise.

 _Where did he learn that?_

Luffy didn't seem at all displeased with Sanji. In fact, he seemed overjoyed. He grinned the way only a lunatic could, before taking a step forward and trying to punch Sanji by shooting various punches at him. Sanji dodged them, but his back hit a table. The blond jumped up onto the table and then proceeded to leap-frog over Luffy so that he was standing in the ring. His hands never left his pockets.

"Is that the best you can do, Captain?" Sanji teased.

"Okay, that's it, no more going easy," Luffy declared. "You want to fight?"

"Dying to," Sanji replied with a smirk.

"AHHH!" Luffy screamed, running up to Sanji. His sudden scream distracted Sanji long enough for Luffy to punch him in the gut, forcing the blond to keel over. Luffy then grabbed his arm with his free hand and was about to do something, what, no one would know, because then Sanji's hand gripped Luffy's arm that was holding onto him and used it as leverage to flip himself over the big eyed man, his feet kicking Luffy in the head in the process. Once he was back on his feet, his hand returned back into the confines of his pants.

Luffy rubbed his head. "Ow, that hurt!"

"Kinda the point," Sanji said with a shrug. "This is a fight, isn't it?"

Luffy grinned.

He lunged himself onto the floor, grabbing the cook's ankles tightly. Sanji tried to shake him off, but the uneven distribution of weight threw him off balance and it seemed Sanji refused to fall in front of an audience. Luffy then wormed his way closer to Sanji's body and stood up, standing on Sanji's toes.

"Are we dancing now?" Sanji asked. "Because, no offence, you're not my type."

Luffy wrapped one of his legs around Sanji's, hooking at the knee joint. He gave a fierce tug forward and Sanji's balance wavered. He had to grab onto Luffy's shoulders to stop himself from falling over. Luffy laughed, using his other foot to wrap around Sanji's other ankle. He gave another fierce tug and Sanji's balance abandoned him completely and he fell to the floor.

"You're handsome Sanji," Luffy told him, "In a completely platonic way of course," he added. "But …" His eyes wander across the arena and landed on Nami. "I prefer a little danger."

"That so?" Sanji asked, sitting up using his elbows. He kicked at Luffy's feet, setting him off balance and making the dark haired man fall to the floor, face first. Sanji stood up and dusted off his pants. "How's that for danger?"

Luffy made a move to grab at Sanji's legs again, but the blond backed up and kicked at him instead, leaving a boot-shaped footprint on Luffy's forehead.

Luffy would not be beaten though. He picked himself up off the floor just as Sanji turned to Zoro, asking for a cigarette and clocked Sanji straight in the jaw.

The cook staggered back and rubbed his face, seeing blood stain his blue shirt. He frowned. "This was my favourite!"

Zoro watched Sanji, the way his eyes lit up and the way his legs moved. When Sanji dropped to the floor, laying his hands out and swept his foot above him, swiftly kicking Luffy rather harshly in the jaw, he couldn't help but watch the fire in his eyes as he stood back up and sent Luffy a glare. He looked … fuck, the cook looked sexy that way …

Zoro shook his head. Surely, he was just saying pointless things because he did not just think that about the cook. Nope, he hadn't done that. Not at all.

The fight went on, Sanji kicking smoothly and Luffy delivering a variety of punches and the occasion kick.

Sanji was right. He had never heard of savate. The way he fought was different. It was noticeably different while at the same time, one would think maybe he was just a bit rusty and was using slightly altered techniques. Another thing Zoro noticed. Other than to use them as leverage, Sanji never attacked with his hands.

Luffy jumped off a table and latched his arms around Sanji's neck, as though to get a piggy-back ride. The blond threw himself down on his shoulder onto the ground, forcing Luffy to fall with him. He squirmed and then, somehow, in a way that Zoro could not fathom, Sanji made a bridge with his body and kicked, hitting Luffy and successfully throwing Luffy off of him. Sanji stood back up, but was dragged back down by Luffy grabbing onto his knee tightly and pulling.

The two landed on the floor with a thud.

They were both bruised from attacks from each other, each one sporting battle scars. Luffy smiled while Sanji smirked. It was clear that the cook didn't want to lose and would not accept defeat at the hands of Luffy, but at the same time, Luffy seemed to want to drag the battle out, see how much Sanji had up his sleeve.

Zoro had already seen the blond do moves that could only be accomplished if the one performing them were remarkably flexible.

Sanji wiped his mouth again. There was slightly more blood on his sleeve. He was sweating and his breath was coming out heavy. God, he looked fucking se— no, he was not going down that road again. Better yet, he wouldn't even start down that road because he had never thought that in the first place.

"Your boy's doing pretty well, isn't he, Zoro?"

Zoro jumped, his eyes leaving the fight for the first time at the sound of Nami's voice. "Luffy's not doing too badly either."

"Yeah well, what can you expect from the captain of the group?" Nami asked. "I still don't know why he insisted on calling us a 'crew' and making himself captain. As far as Usopp's concerned, he's the captain of this metaphorical crew. What, does he think we're pirates or something?"

"I think Luffy might have read too much _Treasure Island_ as a child, don't you?"

"Read?" Nami repeated.

"Good point, that book's too big for him, he probably just saw the movie a thousand times," Zoro conceded jokingly.

Nami smirked.

"What?" Zoro asked, his eyes following Sanji once more as he used a table for leverage to lift half of his body up and kick Luffy underneath the chin, forcing him to stagger back.

"Do you know what you said?" Nami asked him.

"No, what?"

 _Why's she grinning like she won the lottery? What did I say?_ Zoro tried to remember the conversation, but it was kinda of hard watching as Luffy threw Sanji onto the ground for what had to be the twentieth time tonight. _Watching_ Treasure Island _, Luffy isn't bad at fighting— oh wait._

 _"Your boy's doing pretty well, isn't he, Zoro?"_

 _Your boy._

Zoro hadn't denied it.

It shouldn't have embarrassed him, but he felt a blush beginning to creep its way onto his cheeks. Sanji wasn't "his boy", whatever the hell that meant. When Nami said it was something he said, she had meant it was what he hadn't said. He hadn't denied that Sanji was his boy.

Using possessive pronouns seemed stupid to him, but then again, he used them with Wado. Wado was _his_ sword. The king-sized bed was _his_ bed. The shinai was _his_ , it was _his_ bōgu, it was _his_ shit-apartment— no. That one wasn't right. It was _their_ shit-apartment.

Fuck, what was he thinking?

"I think Ace might call the match off," Nami said, breaking into Zoro's thoughts. "It's almost twelve, they've been at it for hours."

"Sanji won't let them tie," Zoro told her. "He's too prideful for that."

"Sanji, eh? I thought he was Curly Brow, or Cook, or bastard, or asshole, or anything that _wasn't_ Sanji," Nami said with a smirk.

"Why you …" Zoro couldn't find words. Instead, he bit his bottom lip and turned his attention back towards the match. "Fucking crazy woman, driving me up a wall!"

"That's what I'm here for, hon," she teased.

It took a while, but Zoro finally heard the undeniable sound of money. Of counting money. Of _Nami_ counting money.

Zoro turned to her again to see her holding various bills in her hand, licking her finger as she flipped through them, counting under her breath.

"Why the fuck do you have money?"

Nami stopped and glared at him. "You made me lose count!"

"That doesn't answer my question Nami, why do you have money?"

"To better the Japanese economy?"

"Bullshit."

Nami rolled her eyes. "Just collecting the bets."

"The bets?" Zoro repeated. "As in gambling?" He sighed. "You're unbelievable."

"What? I figured it all out, I don't need to ask you for permission to have others place bets on who's going to win, I just need to do it. It's not like you have any control over me."

"What will Luffy say?"

Nami snorted. "He won't care, he'll just be happy we have more money for more meat."

Sadly, what she said was very true.

Against Zoro's better judgement, he eyed the money. "How much is that?"

"Well, it's at least 45," Nami said. "And the other pile's about 59," she added.

"Other pile?"

"One's for Luffy, one's for your boy."

"He's _not_ my boy," Zoro snarled. "And by 45, do you mean hundred?"

"Hundred?" Nami laughed. "I mean thousands, Marimo."

Hearing Nami call him that made him scowl. He barely tolerated Sanji calling him it, so why should Nami get to pick fun at his hair? "So … do I even want to know which pile is for which?"

Nami smirked. "Interested?"

"Just curious."

"Well, the 59 thousand is Luffy's pile, the 45 is Sanji. The ladies seem to like him too," she added. "Something tells me he's eye-candy."

"Eye-candy?" Zoro choked out.

"Yeah, something good for the girls to see. Good-looking, good fighter, a real charmer you got there." Nami's eyes surveyed the room before they fell on someone. "I've gotta go," she told Zoro with a laugh, patting him on the shoulder. "I think Sanji's pile just got bigger!"

With that, she left. Zoro could practically see the yen signs in her eyes.

Zoro turned back to the fight to see both Sanji and Luffy lying on the floor, staring at the ceiling.

"Am I dead?" he heard Luffy say.

Zoro watched Sanji's leg extended and struck Luffy's side. "Moron, it's just the lighting."

Ace walked into the ring at that moment and picked both Sanji and Luffy up by one arm. "So, it seems like we have a tie," he said.

"WHAT?!"

Zoro had to laugh at the way Sanji immediately pulled himself out of Ace's grasp and gaped at him. "How the fuck do you call that a tie?"

"Well, you both dropped at the same time," Ace replied. "And I highly doubt you can fight with the condition you're in," he added. "So—"

"No," Sanji cut him off. "No, no, no. This is _not_ a tie. Either he beat me, or I beat him. There has to be some way to score this so we actually have a winner. Don't give me that 'everyone's a winner' bullshit. There's winning and then there's losing. It's not a competition if there's no actual winner!"

Ace stared at Sanji in shock. Probably surprised by the amount of energy he still had after such a long fight, then he started to grin and eventually, laugh. "This is Sanji?" Ace asked Luffy.

Luffy nodded. "He's pretty awesome, right?" Luffy had a dumb smile on his face, then again, Zoro always found Luffy's expressions to be dumb.

Ace nodded. "I'm Ace," he introduce himself to Sanji. _Because of course, introducing yourself after you had him and your younger brother practically fight to the death in a gruesome match that had to have lasted at least three hours is totally legit._ "I'm this little squirt's brother," he said, ruffling Luffy's hair.

Sanji nodded, his breathing harsh. "I can … see the resemblance," he said through pants.

"You okay?" Ace asked, giving Sanji a worried look. "You can sit down if you want."

Sanji shook his head. "I'm fine. Zoro, give me my blazer, would you?" he asked.

Zoro stood up and walked over to him.

Sanji was tired. He was coated in sweat, soaking his shirt. Zoro briefly wondered once more why he didn't just roll up his sleeves or take off his shirt— no one would mind and if what Nami said was true, a couple of girls would probably love him for it— when he remembered once more what was stopping him. The scars. The blond's hair still managed to hide one of his blue eyes and he didn't bother to push away the strand. He was taking deep gulps of air, probably the cleanest air he had ever inhaled in a while. Watching the sweat drip down Sanji's forehead, the way his shirt clung to him— Zoro shook his head and thrusted the blazer at him, turning his head away. What was happening to him? Maybe he needed to get himself checked?

Sanji lit up a cigarette and seemed to instantly relax once more.

"Come on, let's go," he told Zoro.

Ace smiled Sanji's back as he walked away. It was like he knew Zoro would followed him. "You're welcome back any time," Ace told Sanji's retreating figure. "You can have a rematch and we'll have an official winner, that sound good to you?"

Sanji stopped and turned around, giving Ace a lazy smile that Zoro had never seen before. What was it with all these expressions he had never before witnessed? He felt his stomach churn with a sudden and rather random urge to punch Ace in the face. "If he's up for it," Sanji said, nodding towards Luffy.

Luffy gave him the thumbs up sign.

"Well, I'd better be going, we drove here in my car," Zoro said. "Nice seeing you Ace."

He was about to leave when he felt Ace's hand on his shoulder, stopping him. "Hey Zoro?"

"Yeah?"

"Take good care of him, okay?"

Zoro didn't understand, but he nodded anyway. "Yeah. Sure."

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : The thank-yous!_

 _JustCallMeLucie: Quite personally, it's the awkwardness of a couple that I absolutely adore and its what makes writing them fun. Don't worry, when there's an actual sweet moment that's supposed to be sweet, not even Sanji and Zoro can screw it up. Now that you've mentioned it, you have me wondering it too. What WOULD Zoro do if he came across Sanji masturbating? I might just write a story about that, perhaps. I don't know. Maybe. Thanks for the idea! Sasuke and Naruto? As Sasuke as the uke or seme? The funny thing about all the polar opposite couples though is that they have so much in common at the same time. Naruto and Sasuke are both stubborn, hard-headed at times, determined, single-minded people. They're both orphans, they both have life goals that seem kinda strange to outsiders, they both know what loneliness is. There's more, but I can't think of them all off the top of my head._

 _lilcutieprincess: Yeah, I always realize all my various mistakes after posting it. I will revise them later. I tried to revise this chapter before posting since it's so long, but because it's so long, I got impatient. I know Hikaru and Kaoru are incestuous, but um... guilty pleasure? I suppose I could call it that. If you like Zero and Yuki, I have a story called **Chocolate Hater,** it's a three-shot, two chapters are posted if you want to check it out! Ciel and Sebastian, love them too, but it seems kind of like pedophilia. You know **Black Butler** was supposed to be a yaoi story, but then the editors were like, "it won't sell well that way, instead, tease the fangirls to death with moments that'll make them die of nosebleeds instead." Well, they didn't put it that way, but that's basically what they meant._

 _Ayamichan34 (x3): It's fine if you're not always in time with reviews, I answer them anyway and I'm glad you review! There are some cliches and tropes I like, like say ... friends with benefits, healing each other's wounds, making a bet, stuff like that, but I also like to spice things up. This is my attempt at a story of development, healing and trust. I hope I'm doing a good job so far! Yup, Taiga ... God, what can I say about her? She's just so ... I don't even know! You're right, that would probably be the best 50$ I'd ever spend too. You're probably one of the few people who tell me that in **Naruto** , their favourite yaoi pairing isn't Naruto and Sasuke. Though, now that you mention it, I can see Shikamaru and Neiji._

 _Dyola : So I looked into that story you mentioned, with the 40 chapters with no sex? And I was like, "Holy shit, it's in French!" I think when I'm more confident in my abilities to understand the French language, I will definitely give it a read. But at least tell me there's a kiss somewhere in there, right? Cause I read one story (it was a **Harry Potter** one) where there was no kiss until like, chapter 58._

 _Okay, now let's see, I think Sasuke and Naruto are a very popular yaoi pairing, which I can't deny, I do love them too. Completely and totally. But anyway, my question (and a bonus question)!_

 _Question: I will admit I'm a fujoshi. This is a category of otaku (which I personally take to mean an obsessive person over media from Japan) which focuses on people obsessed with yaoi. Fujoshi has 3 different subcategories:_

 _ **Yunoshi** : Tends to prefer the seme (top, or dominant figure), however still supports the uke (bottom, or passive figure)._ _**Kainoshi** : Contrary to Yanoshi, prefers uke over seme due to his cuter characteristics._ _**Pandajoshi** : Supports all types of BL couples (uke/seme or otherwise). _

_So allow me to ask you guys a question: **what subcategory of fujoshi do you fit into?**_

 _ **BONUS QUESTION:** last night an idea struck me for a Naruto and Sasuke story. I've come up with four chapters (plot wise) and written about 500 words as a small blurb of it, testing it out. It's called **The Price of Love.** Now the question is, **would any of you be interested in me writing it?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	12. Something To Treasure

_**Author's Note** : Before I apologize for this chapter's ridiculously small length, I want to address a review that came to me for chapter 3. I'm not sure if this person's still reading, but judging by their review, they're not. It's pretty simple what the review said. That this story was ridiculous because Sanji would never be this weak, that this story doesn't actually have Sanji in it because there's no way the ass-kicking cook could ever be beaten by the cooks and that this is not fanwork, this is an insult to **One Piece**. So I'm going to tell you this: this story is an AU, the characters have been altered slightly. The summary of this story warns that much, talking about abuse. The rating is M, there are warnings above chapters that need them. If you don't like this kind of story, then don't read it. It's pretty simple. I personally am a fan of **One Piece**. I like it, I think it's funny, creative and that the author's a genius. If to others this fanfiction seems like it's tearing apart **One Piece** and you don't like it, fine. It's not for everyone. This story has a mature rating and puts the characters in different settings they would never be in normally under the original **One Piece** story line. If people aren't fans of AUs, then don't read this. But I take pride in what I write, I like to think it's good and I know for lots of people putting their work on here is hard. It's hard for me. It means you're letting others criticize your work and see what you've done and get their opinion on it. Posting this story was very scary for me because I haven't seen much of **One Piece**. I will admit this: I'm not even the 100s of the show yet. Yes, I am that inexperienced in this fandom. But I came up with a story that I thought some would appreciate and so I wrote it. I decided to post it, despite the fact that rarely have I ever written something like this. I don't usually write abuse stories, nor do I write suicidal stories, but this story is the exception. For me it took a lot of courage to post this story and to continue writing it. I'm sorry if you don't like it, no one's forcing you to read it though. Don't torture yourself with my stuff if you hate it. But to tell me that my story is an insult and not fanwork, that hurts. Because honestly, anyone who posts in this archive and does not label it as "crack" is submitting something to show how much they like this series. I don't think you need to be that harsh, personally. So here's the deal: if you don't like it, don't read it. It's very simple. But don't go around telling people they're insulting a fan-base because they worked up the courage to let the world see what they write because for me, writing is very personal. It reveals a lot about me, in my opinion and I have a very distinct writing style (as my friend claims), but I rarely get praise for it. I'm happy people are enjoying this story, but if you insult my writing by calling it an insult, you're insulting me. And I don't think that's fair to anyone.  
On a less depressing note, the things Sanji says in this story are based purely on fiction and therefore, I dunno, I just wanted him to turn out this way. I do not own **One Piece** , **Rurouni Kenshin** or **Samsung**. Thanks for the reviews will be found at the end. Now I will say it: SORRY THIS IS SO SHORT! Also, the reason why Sanji doesn't have an iPhone, it's a personal policy of mine that no character I have control over (or temporary control for the sake of fanfiction) shall own an iPhone! They're too mainstream (and I say this while begging my dad to give me his old iPhone)!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Mentions of rape (very vague), self-harm**

 **Suicidal thoughts**

* * *

Chapter 12: Something To Treasure

* * *

It was raining. Of course it was fucking raining the one day that Zoro let Sanji go out on his own, without someone looming over him like he was some criminal on parol, to get the groceries. Fucking fantastic.

Sanji pulled his blazer tighter around him and grit his teeth. Was the cosmos trying to tell Sanji that he was never going to be allowed to leave the shit apartment on his own? Honestly, karma sucked.

He quickly found a phone booth and scurrying inside, he shut the door behind him. Feeling into his pockets, he tried to find any loose change he may have. Of course, his hands were fucking freezing and felt as though they were turning numb. It was September, why was it raining in September? Wasn't it supposed to rain in April? April showers bring May flowers and all that shit?

With a sigh, Sanji managed to pull out enough money and put it through the slot. He lifted a finger to dial the apartment's number when he realized something.

He had no fucking clue what the number was.

Shit.

"Fucking bastard, never telling me anything," Sanji muttered under his breath. _God, I'm going to_ ** _kill_** _Zoro when I get home._

Sanji froze. Home? _Did I just think_ ** _home_** _? Shit, no, it's not a home, it's a shit apartment with shitty electricity and shitty Internet connection. It's a shitty apartment with a shitty roof and a shitty swordsman— fuck, I've seen him in a kendo match, I can't call him a shitty swordsman with no actual basis for it! Wait a minute, I can do whatever I fucking want, he's not the fucking boss of me!_ There was a brief pause in Sanji's thoughts. _I swear a lot, don't I?_

Pressed up against cold glass, feeling as though he was certainly going to get hypothermia, Sanji waited. He was patient, he could wait.

And wait. And wait.

 _Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick—_

 _Fuck it!_

Sanji took his cigarette out of his pocket and lit it up. The warmth from the lighter sent pleasant shivers down his spine. His hair was damp and so were his clothes. Sanji hated the feeling of sticky clothes. He lit his cigarette once more, letting the warmth fill the small confines of the booth. He placed one of his hands closer to the lighter for the sake of heat, wondering why he didn't use matches. If he did, he could've probably warmed up both of his hands. He felt his skin prickle at the feeling of the sudden warmth and sighed in contentment.

A clap of thunder boomed overhead and Sanji instinctively pressed himself up against the glass as though bracing himself for another painful blow from the cooks.

Zoro could help distract him, that he could admit, but no one, regardless of whether or not they were the green-haired swordsman, could make him forget.

The lighter ran over his left thumb by accident as he collided with the glass. The burning sensation was nothing new, he had burnt himself several times in the kitchen when he was younger out of carelessness. And a few times that had not been so absent-minded. He closed the lighter and plunged in the cold, feeling it in his bones. Fuck, he was freezing.

He could light up his lighter again, just for the sake of warmth. Yeah, he could do that.

His thumb burned a little, felt a little sore, but there was no blood, just a mark. Another mark amongst many. What did it matter to have another? If he was already broken, bruised and scarred, nothing could possibly taint him more. His body's system was filled with nauseating chemicals from the cigarettes, his body itself was covered in scars— self-inflicted and otherwise— certain parts of him bruised worst than others, he knew he had no depth to himself. There was no reason to try and preserve it.

In a phone booth in God-knew-where of Tokyo, no one would know. Maybe they could assume he was just struck by lightning? After all, feeling nothing at all was better than being hurt, wasn't it? Failed attempt after failed attempt had gone wrong and what did he have to live for anyway?

He had no parents, no family. The cooks hated him and probably thought he was dead at this point. Zeff didn't seem to be coming back all that quickly. What was there for him?

 _"One more," Sanji said. He took a deep breath. He didn't know what he expected Zoro to say, he really didn't. He already classified his friends under a category of "idiots", but all the same, once his breath was out, he managed to speak. "Nakama."_

 _Zoro stared Sanji straight in the eye. "You."_

 ** _Zero point ninety-six seconds._**

 ** _"What the fuck?"_**

 _Zoro smirked. "See how confusing that is?" Zoro threw his hands up in the air. "Don't ask me explain, cause I can't, but when you say nakama, I think of you. Apparently, we both think of each other. Not like it matters or anything," he added quickly._

Wrong. He was wrong. There _was_ something more.

The past two months hadn't felt real, not at all. Going to that club, Partys, was insane. He hadn't even known he could beat someone up that badly! It had been amazing and it wasn't as though he hadn't noticed Zoro watching his every move. Luffy had said he was quite good and Sanji had even been invited there again! He hadn't felt guilt from beating Luffy up either. It had been a different kind of fight from the ones he had with the cooks, it was one where they were both equal and the whole point of it was to simply see who was stronger, not to break the other down. Sanji had thought he was too far gone in his life to have a life-defining moment, but he felt as though he had had it in that bar. In that old time, rusty looking bar with those idiots whom Zoro called "friends" and he had had more fun than he'd ever dare to admit.

He had felt … free.

 _Besides_ , Sanji reasoned, shutting the lighter. _Zoro's quitting, I can't have him recovering before me, can I?_

The idea of a competition against the swordsman sent fire through Sanji's veins. He wasn't even sure why. Maybe it was because of the way Zoro did everything passionately and fully, the way he was never half-assed, no matter how lazy he was. If he thought Luffy needed chewing out, he'd do it, yelling, screaming, uvula waving and all. If he thought Nami ought to stop gambling, he'd have a stern talk with her until that talk was imprinted in her mind, nagging her every time, even if it didn't do anything to change her habits. If Zoro wanted to save someone—

Sanji stared at the falling rain. Was that what his relationship was with Zoro? Was it not really the captor and captive story he had worked up in his head? Maybe it was … saviour and rescued?

 _Did … did Zoro save me?_

Sanji tried to think of where he'd be about this time if Zoro had taken him from the Baratie.

 _Patty would be screaming at me to get to work, I'd have tried to get out of the kitchen again and served Zoro, then gone back and gotten a beating. They'd probably have … done it again …_

Sanji shivered and recoiled at the mere memory.

But what if he had never met Zoro? Would they have not done that? Sanji shook his head. No, they probably would've, regardless if the swordsman had ever became a nightly client. They'd find a reason so that their twisted minds thought what they were doing was justified.

That just made Sanji repeat the same question once more.

 _Did Zoro save me?_

During the two hours that it took the storm to wear down, Sanji still couldn't find an answer he was satisfied with.

* * *

"Oi! Marimo! Open the damn door!"

It was one o'clock in the morning, Sanji knew. His cigarettes were soaked, which meant he'd need new ones, no doubt. Another thing he realized that in all of days or rather, weeks of living with Zoro, the bastard had never given him a key to the apartment. Did he just assume that Sanji would stay inside forever and never need a way in?

The door opened and he was greeted by the face of an angry green-haired gorilla. No, wait, that was Zoro.

"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT FUCKING TIME IT IS?" he demanded, his eyes narrowing, his jaw set. He seemed mad. No, beyond mad, he was _livid_. "YOU THINK YOU COULD AT LEAST CALL TO TELL ME YOU'D BE BACK LATE, BUT NOOOO! MR. TOP-NOTCH COOK CAN'T DO THAT, CAN HE?! TOO MUCH OF A BOTHER IN HIS NIGHT, ISN'T IT?"

There was the sound of another door opening and Sanji turned around to see a nearly bald man grumbling. He wore a bathrobe and slippers. He sent a glare in Zoro's direction. "It is not the time to be hollering like a hooligan!" he snapped at Zoro. "Take your lover's quarrel inside and let us get some sleep!"

With that, the man slammed the door behind him.

Sanji hurried himself inside while Zoro slammed the door shut behind him. He couldn't have been louder if he tried. With his arms crossed and his mouth set in a thin line, Zoro almost looked scary. Keyword: almost.

"Sit," Zoro commanded, gesturing towards the couch.

Sanji sat, trying to hold in his laughter.

Zoro began pacing back and forth in front of Sanji, mumbling under his breath, sometimes random words, sometimes curse words. Regardless of what they were, they only added to Sanji's amusement.

"I'm going to try and be rational here," Zoro said in a tone that screamed he was trying not to yell. "Now, I understand that it was raining, I get that. But I just asked you to get the groceries. I expected you back by nine and instead, you came back at one. I had to order take-out. Fucking take-out." Zoro shook his head. "I forgot how bad that shit is compared to your cooking." Sanji said nothing about the compliment Zoro had just given him. "It's late, I'm tired, you're drenched and need to take a shower. I doubt you had food so there's some food on the counter which I didn't eat," Zoro gestured. "I'm going to go and sleep tonight and we'll talk about this in the morning. The only thing I'll ask of you is that next time, you call when you plan on walking in so late."

Sanji bit his lip.

"What?" Zoro asked. His fists were curled and his knuckles were white in an attempt to behave and he was wearing holes into the floor. "You have something to say, Curly Brow?"

Sanji needed no other invitation. "You didn't give me the shit-apartment's number."

Zoro stared at him.

"Huh?"

"You. Didn't. Give me. The shit-apartment's. Number." Sanji spoke slowly and deliberately, like the way he had told Zoro his favourite colour. He didn't give a damn what other people said, just because a colour was defined by the amount of light absorbed into one's pupil didn't mean that black wasn't a colour. Just because it had no light, that didn't make it any less of a colour than white.

"WHAT?!"

There was a knock on the door, probably another neighbour complaining but Zoro spun on his heel, opened the door and screamed, "WE'RE HAVING A FUCKING CONVERSATION, MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS!" and promptly slammed the door in their face.

"I believe that was the landlord," Sanji said.

"Who gives a fuck?"

"I tired to call you know, but while in the telephone booth I came across the realization that you didn't trust me enough to give me your number," Sanji told him. "So technically this whole predicament is your fault."

"My fault?" Zoro repeated. " _My fault?_ "

"You know, you tend to repeat things when you're angry," Sanji noted. "Reiterating things gets kind of annoying, don't you find?"

Zoro slammed his fist down on the table and Sanji didn't even blink. He had seen worse fights at the Baratie, Zoro didn't scare him. "How the fuck is this my fault? Why didn't you call the 119 number to get mine?"

"Because I only had so much loose change on me after spending so much because your fridge is fucking empty, that I could only make one call!"

Zoro stared at him. "You tried to use a phone booth?"

Sanji nodded.

"Why the fuck were you using a phone booth?"

"Because," Sanji said, exasperated, "I don't have a cell phone."

"YOU DON'T HAVE A CELL PHONE?!"

Sanji sighed once more. Even if Zoro didn't scare him, he would be the reason Sanji would lose his hearing at such a young age. "Yes Zoro, I don't have a cell phone. The bastard cooks never gave me one," he said. "There was never any reason for me to own one. I used the phone at the Baratie and the only time I really left the place was to go grocery shopping or to buy more cigarettes. I didn't have a reason to have my own phone." He stood up and took off his blazer. He was soaked to the bone, Goddammit. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to take that shower you mentioned."

Zoro shook his head. "Stop!" he commanded.

Sanji froze and turned to him. "Was that an order?" Sanji asked. "You are not the boss of me, you understand that, don't you, Marimo?"

Zoro shook his head once more, looking more and more frustrated by the minute. He pulled at his hair and took a deep breath, probably counting to ten from the way his fists were clenching. "Give me a second," he told Sanji, "just give me a second before you go prancing off into your shower."

"Prancing?" Sanji repeated. "I never said anything about prancing."

Zoro sighed, closed his eyes and breathed in through his nose, out through his mouth. Was he … meditating? Then again, the Internet had said that Zoro liked meditation. _Yeah but 60 percent of the Internet is porn, 30 percent is cat videos and 10 percent is lies._

When Zoro opened his eyes again, it looked as though he had come to peace with his inner-self. Or, as peaceful as you can get when you're in the embodiment of anger itself. "Okay. You don't have a phone. I can fix that," he muttered more to himself than Sanji. "Tomorrow we're going shopping."

"What? Why?" Sanji demanded, looking alarmed.

"To get a phone, why else? Now close your mouth, take your shower and go to bed, I'm going to collapse."

* * *

Sanji was never a fan of crowded places. At least, not crowded places that weren't the Baratie. He wasn't used to them. With a sigh, he eyed the crowded store. There were people of all ages, men and women, walking around. Some were in the camera department, others in the TV. All Sanji wanted was to be back in Zoro's apartment with the stupid remote in hand, maybe catch _Rurouni Kenshin._ Probably not though, since Zoro insisted he needed a phone.

"Look, it's not that big of a deal," Sanji insisted. "Can't we just leave?"

"No," Zoro said. "I need to be able to reach you at all times—"

"So what? You just stick a GPS in my hair and get it over with," Sanji snapped. "Is a phone really necessary?"

"At this stage in the twenty-first century? Yes."

Sanji sighed. "Fine," he grumbled. Looking around the store, his eyes settled on a phone.

"How about this?" Zoro asked, holding up a phone. Reading the label on the stand, Sanji knew it was a Samsung Galaxy S6. It looked like an iPhone really, at least to his eyes.

"Yeah, sure," he told Zoro with a shrug. "I don't really care."

"Clearly you don't," Zoro replied.

After they walked around for a while, Zoro still clinging onto the Samsung, the green-haired swordsman turned to Sanji.

"Hey I was wondering," he said slowly. "Where'd you learn to fight?"

"Where'd _you_ learn to fight?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow to challenge Zoro's question.

"A dojo," he replied. "One run by my friend's father."

Sanji nodded. He wanted to ask which friend, but thought that perhaps, judging by the look on Zoro's face, he'd best not.

"I answered your question, you answer mine," Zoro told him.

Sanji sighed and shoved his hands into his pockets. "I don't know," he admitted. "I mean sure, the cooks beat me up pretty badly, but I never really … fought back, you know? I mean I tried to every once in a while, but before anything could happen, I was thrown across the kitchen and then Zeff intervened."

Zoro looked at Sanji. "Who's Zeff?"

Sanji paled. He didn't even know why. It wasn't a crime for Zoro to know more about his past, but it hurt Sanji remembering it. Sanji shook his head, hoping Zoro would forget he had even mentioned Zeff's name. "And anyway, I was never in a position to attack. They always got me first. Would you believe me if I told you that night at the Baratie was the first time I had ever kicked someone in the head?"

"No, I wouldn't." His eyes still held a question, probably about Zeff, but he seemed as though he wouldn't ask it. "So you've seriously never been taught to fight before?"

"Nope," Sanji replied. "Watched the cooks fight a lot though," he admitted.

"You just … I dunno, you looked so composed fighting Luffy, I figured—"

"I was some tough, ass-kicking delinquent?" Sanji shook his head. "No gangsters in my childhood, only lunatic chefs."

Zoro nodded. "I was wondering, when you fight, you have this habit …" he trailed off.

"What?"

"Do you know that you keep your hands in your pocket?" Zoro asked. "Because you never use them when you fight. Ever. Luffy threw punches and you just dodged them. You never raised a fist. Not once."

Sanji smirked. "Didn't know that," he said. "But it makes sense, I suppose."

"What do you mean?"

"Think about it this way; when you're a soccer player, you have to avoid injury to your legs and feet. You need to protect the organs and/or limbs that are necessary for you to continue doing what you love, right?" He shrugged. "Same goes for cooks. You can't cook if you damage your hands."

"True," Zoro pointed out. "So that'd be like if a swordsman harmed their hands, wrists or arms, right? They need them to fight."

"Exactly," Sanji said. "Guess it's instinct or something, to keep my hands out of the fight."

"But you use your feet to fight," Zoro replied.

"Yeah, how else am I suppose to fight? Using only my torso?"

Zoro nodded slowly. "I get it. So you treasure your hands, don't you? They're very important to you and special."

"You love sword-fighting, right? You treasure your swords," Sanji said. "I'm a cook and I love being in the kitchen. I treasure my hands."

There was silence between the two of them. A comfortable one, when Sanji saw a woman come up behind Zoro and tap him on the shoulder.

The marimo flew a foot in the air, turning around sharply and glaring at the girl. "What?" he demanded.

Sanji frowned. "You're being rude to a lady," he told him. He gave the woman an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry for my friend, he's just an ass."

The woman giggled and nodded, a blush appearing on her cheeks. She looked away from them, trying to compose herself before she turned back and gestured towards the phone in Zoro's hand. "Are you going to purchase that?"

Zoro followed her gaze. "Right, yeah, this." He nodded. "Yeah, we'll take it."

Sanji frowned. "Hey, I never agreed on—"

"I said. We'll. Take. It."

Sanji sighed, rolling his eyes. "If you could lead us to the cash Miss, that'd be wonderful," Sanji said with another false smile her way.

She giggled and lead them towards a man who stood behind the counter. He looked at Zoro and Sanji before frowning. "So uh, who's paying?" he asked.

"I am," they both said at the same time.

"You don't even want the damn thing," Zoro reminded him.

"Yeah, but you're broke," Sanji said.

"It's not my fault your restaurant's so fucking expensive!" he snapped back.

"I didn't ask you to come!"

The man looked between the two of them, probably wishing he had finished college so he wouldn't be stuck with this miserable, lousy job. "Well, you two could split the bill," he offered shyly.

"NO!" both of them yelled in unison.

"Okay," the cashier said, shrinking into the shadows, slightly terrified of the two.

"Look," Sanji said in a huff, "I have money, I'm paying. If you want, you can pay the tax, okay?" Sanji offered.

"You're telling me you have 60 000 yen on you right now in cash? That has to be illegal!"

Sanji sighed. "The phone's more like 70 000 yen," Sanji said. "You can pay the other 10 000 yen and the tax, does that satisfy you?" he asked.

"Just let the man pay," the cashier said, desperate to have the two of them leave the shop immediately. They were scaring the other customers.

"What, does that make me a girl?!" Sanji demanded. "Let the man pay," he snorted. "Yeah right!"

"You are rather feminine," Zoro said.

"TAKE THAT BACK, YOU BASTARD!"

Sanji sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Look, here's some money," Sanji said, handing over a few wads of bills. "Whatever I didn't pay, let the marimo pay," he added. "This should only bruise his ego slightly rather than being kicked out of the place."

Zoro sighed and crossed his arms. "Fine, but next time, I'm paying."

"I'm not your fucking boyfriend, you don't have to pay for me," Sanji snapped.

Zoro looked taken aback by the word "boyfriend". He blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" he demanded. "I'm not your fucking boyfriend—"

"That's what I just said," Sanji told him, exasperated. He turned to the trembling cashier. "Just wrap it and we'll go."

The man behind the cash had never been more glad that customers had left the store.

* * *

"I wish you had just let me pay," Zoro muttered. "And let me drive my own car," he added.

"You'll get lost," Sanji shot back.

"I will not! It's my apartment!"

Sanji shook his head. "It's a shit apartment and you'd get lost before you even got out of the fucking parking lot and you know it." He looked to the passenger seat to see Zoro playing with Sanji's new phone with interest. Sanji grabbed it out of his hand and glared at him. "What do you think you're fucking doing?"

"Both hands on the wheel cook," Zoro smirked at him. Sanji ignored him briefly and looked down.

 _Name: Zoro Roronoa_

 _Phone number: XXX-XXX-XXXX_

 _Cell number: XXX-XXX-XXXX_

"You're putting yourself in?" Sanji said slowly.

"Yes, now put both hands on the wheel and keep your eye on the road," Zoro snapped. "Honestly, do you even have a driver's license?"

It took a while but as they were driving back in silence, Zoro spoke again.

"You know," Zoro said softly. "If you treasure your hands and you need your legs to fight for self-defence …" he trailed off. "Doesn't that mean that your whole body is a treasure?"

Sanji stared straight ahead but his eyes widened noticeably. "What?" he asked.

"If you need your hands to cook and you can't bear to harm them, then you need to take good care of them. If you need your legs to fight, which will help you stay alive, then you need to take god care of them too. That means everything about you Sanji needs to be treasured, doesn't it?"

Sanji turned away and stared out the window, trying to fight down a blush.

"Fucking liar," he muttered.

 _He can't mean it, can he?_ he thought to himself, but there was a voice in the very back of his mind, nagging him, annoying him, telling him he did.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Now for the thanks!_

 _Guest : I'm really glad you like it! As for the story about Sasuke and Naruto, I'm not sure what I'm going to do about it. I'll keep it as a file saved away in my computer and probably write on it every now and then, but it's going to take serious revision and work before I can post anything._

 _Dyloa : Yes, you are totally right! That saying is spot on! So I actually tried to read your French story. I'm slow at reading things that aren't my first language, but out of curiosity, you said "l'Orbite" is that the Baratie, but in French? Cause I wasn't sure. A thing I didn't mention about the fujoshi categories: the last one, the you placed yourself under, they don't really associate with that term. I'm the exception to the rule cause I like both semes and ukes, but I do associate with the term. Though I do love other regular pairings a lot. You know I've basically imagined Nami paired up with Zoro, Luffy and Sanji? I can picture all three happening, quite personally, but then I decided I liked Sanji and Zoro together better, but I still think Nami and either of the two would be a good couple. Since Zoro and Sanji were kinda the main pairing of this story and kinda gay, I decided to pair Nami up with Luffy, which is cool since he's the first one I thought to pair her up with. Later on I thought about Sanji and Nami and then Zoro and Nami. I dunno, maybe she's just very compatible to me. I don't know about who'd win since I kinda wanted to make them fair. Considering it's Luffy without the Devil Fruit, I think they're even when they're both mortals. As for when they were to fight in the anime or manga? Yeah, I'd have to admit, Sanji would lose, but I think he'd hold his own pretty well for a while and go out with style._

 _lilcutieprincess : Thanks for answering that bonus question. The thing about it is for that **Naruto** story, I was thinking I'd write it in present-tense, something I'm not that good at, so it'd be rough to start. I am working on it a bit though. _

_Okay now as for my next question: In this chapter, Sanji and Zoro were fighting and the cashier hinted that Sanji was more feminine **. In Sanji and Zoro's relationship, who do you think is the uke?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	13. Come Spar With Me

_**Author's Note:** So okay, this chapter is longer than the last one. I think all chapters will now be around 6000 to 7000 words, so yay! Anyway, this was a chapter I really wanted to writer sooner on in the story, but I like where it is, when I think about it. The thing is, I know nothing about kenjutsu, and this attacks are created purely so that I can see them in my mind as a film. The way that Sanji attacks Zoro when disarming him of his sword is attacked from the front because of the way I picture it in my mind, if Sanji had attacked from the back, the sword would've gone flying forward and potentially slashed at Zoro's face, potentially giving him that scar he gets after the time-skip. I personally like Zoro's left eye, so I kinda wanted him to keep it. I don't own **One Piece.** I know nothing about fighting so the fight scenes are weird, in my opinion. Think of them what you will. This chapter was updated the same day cause I REALLY wanted to know people's reaction to this! And I worked really hard to get it ready for today as well, so sorry if there are mistakes, but don't forget, I will be studying this thing thoroughly once I've reached a point in which I deem this story good and revise everything!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Mentions of rape**

* * *

Chapter 13: Come Spar With Me

* * *

The blond dusted off an invisible speck on his pants before standing up right again. Ace lifted Sanji's arm, declaring him the winner of yet another drunk bar fight.

"You're staring."

Zoro jumped at Nami's voice. He turned to her and frowned. "So what?" he asked. "I need to make sure the bastard doesn't injure himself," he told her. "It's a free country, isn't it?"

Nami shook her head with a sigh. "You're so clueless."

Zoro decided it'd be best not to ask her and instead, continued to watch as Sanji smiled up at Ace, proud of what he had done. Remembering what Nami had said the first night of Sanji's appearance, he turned to her, alarmed. "How much did you steal?"

"It's not stealing if they're offering," Nami pointed out. Zoro's eyes narrowed. "Sanji made a lot."

Zoro shook his head. "You're getting my friend involved in gambling and he doesn't even know it!" He sighed. "Honestly, what are we going to do with you?"

"Love me anyway?" Nami winked at him. She leaned closer onto the table and took a glass from a passing by waiter. "But seriously, you know your boy's making tons of money. It's about time he actually got it," she said. "I mean I keep the money after they hand it in and I give about 75 percent back to the bidders, but the other 25, I dunno, I could give Sanji say … 2?"

"2?" Zoro repeated. "If you're going to make money off of him, at least give him some serious cash!"

"Oh please! 2 percent of what Sanji makes is like, over 12 and you know it. He's good," she added, glancing at the cook out of the corner of her eye. "Hard to believe he's never actually gotten into real fights before. Shame he's wasted on the poor old drunks in this joint. In a good fight, like the one against Luffy, he'd make twice as much, if not three times."

Zoro blinked. "You think so?"

"I know so." She smirked and leaned closer. "You wanna know how much you'd make?"

"What do you mean how much I'd make? I haven't fought since you started this weird betting pool, how are you supposed to know how much I'd make?"

"I can guess. Based on their liking for your fights beforehand, how many people were screaming your name and your popularity with the women …" she trailed off. "Plus, factor in your good-looks, your charm, your fighting style, your body—"

"What does my body have to do with this?" Zoro demanded.

"Honey, the only reason Sanji doesn't get triple of what most people bet, besides the fact that his opponents can't stand upright to begin with, is because he doesn't show any skin. He's probably got thousands of muscles underneath that jacket—"

"Blazer," Zoro corrected instinctively.

"Whatever, but you on the other hand, are not afraid to show a little skin." Nami let the ice circle in her glass before taking a shot. "So anyway, as I was saying, considering those past features you have, add in your actual fighting ability and then make the assumption you're fighting someone of … say Luffy's caliber, like what Sanji did, and I'd say you'd make at least 50."

"Is that from the 2 percent or overall?"

Nami smirked. "Interested?" She shook her head. "The 50 would probably be from the 25 that I take."

"Are we taking hundreds?"

"Hundreds?" Nami raised an eyebrow. "Baby, we're taking thousands!"

Zoro sunk down in his seat, letting this settle in. He looked at Nami carefully. He did need money to pay the rent. Two months with Sanji and paying wasn't getting any easier, what with the large supply of food that Sanji insisted they have to make cooking easier for him and then the television bills Sanji gave him … Plus, the man liked long showers. "How much would someone pay to see a fight between Sanji and I?"

Nami stared at him. "You're serious?"

Zoro nodded. "I need to pay rent, somehow."

Nami looked at him with a strange expression, as though she were trying to figure out whether or not he was telling the truth. She seemed to decide he was and nodded promptly. Zoro could see the gears in her brain working as she tried to consider all the variables and other factors that Zoro might not have thought of. "Depends what kind of fight," she said finally. "Would you be fighting the way you usually do, or would you be fighting taking it seriously?"

"Say it's a serious fight," Zoro said. "What would it be?"

Nami scrunched up her nose in thought. "Provided Sanji makes you shed your top while fighting and the fight lasts about half an hour at least, I'd say you'd get about 45 and Sanji'd get about 39. That's at the current skill level he's at. I mean, he's good this way, but if he were to fight you, you'd need to train him a bit. A little blood spilt in a match isn't that big of a deal, but with the way you fight, Sanji would be bleeding out. If you were able to get him to about your skill level while you fought seriously, I'd say … 15 for you and 12 for Sanji."

"But that's less than at Sanji's current level—"

"I'm not talking thousands," Nami said. "I'm talking millions."

"M-millions?"

Nami nodded. "If you train the guy right, you'd be able to pay rent for your entire life and then some." She smirked. "You interested?"

"Curious," Zoro replied. He turned back to the latest fight that Sanji was in. The guy was clearly drunk from the way he staggered. With a kick that barely packed a punch, he was keeling over screaming "mercy!".

 _A real fight against Sanji, huh? That might be fun._

* * *

"You want to _what_?"

Zoro rolled his eyes. Honestly, this random exclamations on Sanji's part were beginning to get tiresome. It was kind of cute at the beginning, but now— no, it was still cute. But in a totally platonic way with no hints of homosexuality towards that thought, like the way girls seemed to call everything cute, including science test tubes. That kind of cute. Sort of. _Did I just think of Sanji as a test tube?_ Zoro shook his head. "I'm only going to say this one more time, alright?" He took a deep breath and began. "You're a good fighter. You beat up a ton of people at Partys and Nami's gotten into putting money on every fight that happens. She gets a lot of money off of Luffy and you. She gives back 75 percent of the pool to the ones who bid, and keeps 25 percent for herself. I spoke to her and it took some time, but she's decided she's willing to give us 10 percent of the money from her 25 percent. I wanted 15, but she told me 10 was more than enough. Anyway, you make about 27 to 33 thousand per fight in total. She assumes that I would make about 42 to 50 thousand in total. Now she says if we fought against each other, provided you worked on your kicks, we'd make at least 10 million per fight."

Sanji simply stared at him.

"In short, I want to train you."

Sanji raised an eyebrow. "Train me? Am I a dog now?"

"No," Zoro replied, "you know what I mean. While you're good, in a serious fight against me you'd last maybe thirty minutes, if you're lucky. I can teach you endurance and how to defend yourself—"

"I thought you said savate was a form of self-defence anyway," Sanji pointed out.

"That's true, but what you do isn't savate. It's … some kind of screwed up version of savate and your own personal style that I can't really describe," Zoro said. "Anyway, will you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Let me train you."

Sanji seemed deep in thought as he looked at Zoro. Zoro could feel his palms sweating under Sanji's intense gaze. He wasn't sure how to take the blond staring at him with that blue eye of his. He was tempted to ask Sanji about his other eye, the one that was hidden underneath a curtain of golden hair, but thought better of it considering how deeply Sanji was thinking.

Finally, Sanji spoke.

"Does this mean I can pay rent?"

"Are you serious?"

"Deadly."

Zoro shook his head. "I ask if I can train you in order to help us gain large copious amounts of money and your only response is 'can I pay rent?'?!" He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. "You're unbelievable."

"Is that a no?"

"No," Zoro admitted.

"No that's not a no, or no that's a no?"

 _"Tu es ennuyant, savais-tu? Vraiment, je ne sache pas comment je n'ai pas tu tuer déjà!"_

Sanji frowned. "You're speaking French again."

 _"Je sais!"_

Sanji shook his head. "Honestly, you know I can't understand a single thing you're saying right now," he told him. "If you want me to cooperate, saying mean things behind my back won't do you any good, it'll just make me more inclined to ignore your request. And we could be making millions right now if you weren't wasting time talking about croissants and shit."

"Croissants and shit?" Zoro repeated. "What the fuck do you think the French are?"

"Gay," Sanji replied with a shrug. "What? You don't find?"

Zoro shook his head. "That's not the point! The point is I'm trying to be polite by asking you to train with me. We could be like, sparring partners or something. If you're up for it and all, but if you don't want to, fine. I'll just fight Luffy and make my millions another way." Zoro turned to leave when he felt Sanji's hand on his shoulders.

Zoro's whole body shivered.

All physical contact between the two men had been started by Zoro. It was mainly because sometimes, he forgot about what Sanji had gone through. Sanji never initiated contact because it probably brought back bad memories. He still had the occasional tendency to flinch when Zoro tapped his shoulder to get his attention. It was … different, having Sanji touch him rather than him touching Sanji. He felt as though he had made progress of some sort.

Sanji let go of him instantly and tried to pass off how shaken he was by smirking. "Are your fights really worth 50?"

"Yeah, so?"

Sanji crossed his arms triumphantly. "Prove it, Marimo."

Oh, he was going to regret that.

* * *

"This," Zoro said, pulling out a sword from its sheath, "is Sandai Kitetsu."

Sanji stared at the blade. Zoro could admit he found the blade to be pretty, if that was an acceptable word to describe weapons that could murder someone in the blink of an eye. He took pride in owning it and enjoyed the impressed expression on Sanji's face as he looked at it. He expected Sanji to say something about how cool it looked, or how creepy, but instead Sanji merely frowned, once the wonder wore off.

"Where's Wado?"

Zoro snorted. "You think you deserve to be fought with her?" Zoro shook his head. "We start small and then work our way up," he told him. "You're going to start off with Sandai here."

"How many swords do you own?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Three," Zoro replied.

"Three?" Sanji repeated. "Who needs three swords? Do they go on a rotation or something? Like, one day you use the white one and the other day you use this one and then on Wednesdays you decide to use the third?"

"There's no rotation schedule," Zoro told him as though he were crazy. "I fight with all three. I told you, I practice Santoryu, three-sword-style."

Sanji stared at him. Apparently, the cook had forgotten Zoro's little monologue of random facts about himself. "Seriously?" he demanded. Then he frowned. "Then why aren't you fighting me with three swords?"

"Do you think you could handle three swords right now?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow at Sanji.

Sanji bit his lip, honestly thinking about it.

The guy couldn't be cocky enough to believe that he could honestly handle three sharp blades, all attacking him with full force. "Well I mean, realistically, no," Sanji admitted. "But I think I could maybe. Someday."

Zoro nodded. "Until then, you'll be fighting with me and I'll be using one sword. When I think you're ready, I'll fight with two and finally, three," Zoro explained. "Now, are we going to start?"

Showing Sanji the large empty area in his apartment had shocked the cook. Somehow, during the two months in Zoro's apartment he had never stumbled across the alcove which was where Zoro practiced his skills and kept his swords. It had taken a while for Sanji to get over it, but once he had, Zoro told him the way it would work.

"We're going to spar. There are no limits. This isn't like the bar fight, in this fight, we keep going until we can't get up. There will be no judges, other than ourselves. I hope you don't like that shirt you're wearing," he added, nodding towards the light blue shirt with the fancy-looking cuffs. "Cause there's a pretty high chance it'll rip."

"You just try it," Sanji challenged.

And then they begun.

Zoro took the first strike. He lunged forwards with his sword, swiping down. Sanji jumped away in surprise, the blade barely missing him. The others at the bar were good, some might actually be good opponents, Zoro could admit, but even Luffy didn't have the speed Zoro did. Sanji stared at Zoro in shock, as though he couldn't believe his eyes.

"You're seriously trying to kill me, aren't you?"

Zoro shook his head. "Stay focused," he told him, pivoting and striking at Sanji's side.

Sanji dodged, stepping aside. His speed could use some work, but Sanji was a fast learner. When Zoro went to lunge at him again, Sanji quickly moved behind him. For a second, Zoro was surprised at the cook's sudden speed. That second was long enough to be struck in the back of the head by Sanji's foot.

"Fuck, take off your shoes!" Zoro told him, rubbing his head. He raised his sword again in front of him, eyeing Sanji. What were his weak points? When Zoro watched Sanji fight, he rarely ever payed attention to where the opponents attacked, not that if he did it'd do any good since Sanji had them on their knees in a mater of seconds. Where was he weak?

 _Analyze Zoro, analyze. His hips are his centre of balance, that's where his power comes from. He won't use his hands so you don't need to waste time dodging attacks from his arms. His legs are long, so they can probably hit a large radius. Any part of his body is precious to him. Slash at his arm, he has trouble in the kitchen. Attack his legs, he has no defence. But if you attack his legs, he might just kick you in the face. If you attack his arms, that's it for food. Fuck, where do you strike? Where, where, where?!_

"Too slow!"

 _WHAM!_

Sanji's foot collided with Zoro's chest and he slammed into the wall. He slipped down to the floor and stood back up. He was over thinking things, if he didn't think and just let his instincts take over, Sanji wouldn't be beating him. _Don't think_ , he told himself. _Don't think, just do it._

Zoro pushed himself forward off the wall to see Sanji trying to light up a cigarette. He thought Zoro was beaten. Idiot.

Zoro quickly raised his sword and slashed at Sanji's arm. Sanji stepped back and made a move to kick him, but Zoro's blade stopped him. He pushed forcefully forward and Sanji staggered back, trying to balance on one foot. He regained his balance and smirked at Zoro.

"Getting serious now, are we?" he teased.

Zoro went for Sanji's arm again, but the cook dodged and instead, his foot wrapped around Zoro's ankle the way Zoro remembered he did to Luffy. The problem with this position was that while it seemed Sanji had control, with his leg wrapped around Zoro's ankle, the opposite was also true. Zoro kicked his foot outward and Sanji had to let go, lest he fall over.

Zoro gripped the hilt a little tighter. Taking the sheath, he used it to block Sanji's attack to his head. He pushed forward again and Sanji jumped back.

Sanji gritted his teeth. Running towards the wall, Sanji kicked his way up and came down in an circle, using the momentum to kick Zoro in the back. Zoro was pushed forward towards the wall, but he quickly spun around and raised his sword to Sanji's falling figure. Sanji then twisted his body and grabbed Zoro's shoulders to flip himself over the green-haired man, landing on his feet behind the swordsman.

"Not bad," Zoro admitted.

He struck harshly at Sanji's feet and the cook stepped back, but he was now pressed up against the wall. Using his sheath, Zoro struck Sanji in the head, the blond recoiling instinctively, exposing his neck to Zoro. With his back pressed up against the wall and his head back, he looked remarkably vulnerable. Zoro took too long to admire the view (for what reason he considered this a "view" or something worth admiring, he'd never admit, not that he even knew) because when he finally made his next move, Sanji had too.

Using the hilt of his sword, Zoro thrust it into Sanji's stomach the same moment Sanji kicked upwards, successfully kicking Zoro in the balls.

Zoro staggered back and tried not to fall to the floor. Fuck, that hurt. Sanji just smirked at him, but he looked slightly winded.

Zoro took a second to regain his composure before launching himself forward, striking Sanji's chest with the sheath and then following up with a strike to the forehead using the butt of his sword. Sanji ducked quickly, but the sword still hit the crown of his head. He slipped to the floor, underneath Zoro. He wrapped his foot around Zoro's ankle and pulled him down to his level before Sanji stood back up and dusted off his hands.

"Easy," he said, staring at the slightly dazed Zoro.

 _What the fuck just happened?_

"You're panting," Zoro told him. "It wasn't that easy."

Sanji took a deep breath, trying to stop his erratic breathing, but it was useless since Zoro had already noticed it and was smirking. "So what? So are you."

Zoro sat up and felt his brow, feeling sweat pour down. "So I am," he muttered.

* * *

Water break time meant lying on the couch with the TV running some mindless show while Zoro and Sanji dosed themselves in cold water.

With his head tossed back, Zoro poured half of his water bottle over his head. He opened his mouth, catching small drips of it.

"Your couch is getting wet," Sanji told him.

"So?"

Sanji sat forward a bit and glanced at Zoro. "So, what's the story with that sword?" he asked, pointing toward Sandai.

Zoro looked at him. "You want to know the story behind my swords?"

"I dunno, know thy enemy?" Sanji shrugged. "I mean Wado had an interesting story so I figure this one must have one, right?"

Zoro shook his head. "Sorry, but in my opinion, no sword's story matches Wado's." He put his water bottle down and stared at the strange drama that was on TV. He turned it off and turned to Sanji. "I'll tell you, if you really want to know though."

"Okay, so what's the story?" asked Sanji.

"Well, the blade's said to be cursed," Zoro began.

"Cursed?" Sanji repeated. "What, like haunted or something?"

"No, the shop owner just told me it was cursed, no specifics, not that I believe in them anyway." Zoro shrugged. "Anyway, it's said that those who owned this sword in the past were vicious murders who always came to horrible ends. The thing they had in common was this sword," he gestured towards it. "Personally, I don't believe in that bullshit, but not everyone's a skeptic."

"So how much was it?"

"The sword?" Zoro took a deep gulp of water. "Free."

"What do you mean it was free?" Sanji gave him a look that clearly said he thought Zoro was lying. "Nothing's for free."

"Oxygen is," Zoro said.

"No it isn't. In order to breathe oxygen, you have to keep breathing, in order to keep breathing, you have to keep living, in order to live, well, it costs a heck of a lot," Sanji said. "Oxygen isn't free."

Zoro shrugged. "Either way the sword was free. The shop owner was terrified of it, said it was totally cursed and going to kill me in my sleep or something. Sounded like Chucky went samurai to me to be honest." He shook his head. "He gave it to me cause I told him I wanted it. He just wanted to get it off his hands. It's a good thing too, cause I was short on cash anyway so I probably couldn't have afforded it anyway."

Sanji nodded slowly. "Hmm … what about your other sword? The third one?"

"We'll get to it when it comes," Zoro said with a shrug.

Sanji nodded before shaking his head and ruffling Zoro's hair once more. "You look like a drowned cat," he said with a laugh. Zoro tried to avoid Sanji's hands, but he failed immensely and the cook merely grinned while Zoro crossed his arms and bared with it. "A screwed up, green cat, but still, a drowned cat all the same."

Zoro stayed silent, though he didn't like it. People messing with his hair annoyed him and if the cook's nickname was any indication, he enjoyed making fun of his hair above all other features. Zoro picked his feet up from the floor and crossed them, frowning.

"Scratch that, you look like Garfield," Sanji decided. "All grumpy and shit, if Garfield fell into a tub of green paint. You sure this is your natural hair colour?"

A comeback was on the tip of his tongue, but Zoro held it back. He wasn't even going to mention that Sanji had just called him fat, by associating him with that fur-ball. There was silence as Sanji's hands continued to run through Zoro's hair softly and slowly. Zoro wouldn't let himself think about it too much, but it kind of felt … good to have Sanji playing with his hair like that. Okay, fine, he'd admit it felt nice. But that didn't mean anything and he wasn't ever going to repeat it.

"You know," Sanji said, his voice sounding far off, "you wouldn't think it'd be soft, but it's really fluffy."

Immediately, Zoro jumped from the couch. "You did not just call my hair fluffy," he snapped.

"And what if I did?"

"Then … Then …" Zoro's face turned red, with anger or embarrassment, he didn't know, but he did know that Sanji was annoying him. "Shut up!"

"Run out of good insults, Marimo?" asked Sanji teasingly.

"Say that again, I dare you!"

"Ma-ri-mo," Sanji repeated, elongating each syllable.

"That's it, break time's over!"

* * *

When Sanji came into the alcove and folded his blazer, putting it aside, he stopped short when he noticed that instead of one sheath by Zoro's side, there were two sheaths. It had been about two weeks since they had begun and Zoro was certain Sanji was tired of one sword. He had been begging Zoro to let him fight against more than one since sparring with Zoro had become a joke now that Sanji could read Zoro's movements.

"Seriously?" he asked when he saw the two sheaths.

"Sanji, meet Yubashiri."

Sanji raised an eyebrow. "Still no Wado?"

"You'll get to fight against Wado when you're ready for her," Zoro snapped. "Do you have a problem with that?" he demanded.

Sanji shook his head and stared at the blade. "This one … I think it competes against Wado for beauty," he said.

So Zoro wasn't the only one who appreciated the aesthetics of swords. "Intimidated?" Zoro asked with a smirk.

"It just … looks royal," Sanji admitted. "How'd you get your hands on it?"

"That's a story for another day," Zoro told him. "Now are you ready to fight?"

Sanji took a deep breath, sizing up the sword as though by looking at it hard enough, he'd figure out how it worked. "Okay."

They began.

Zoro struck once with Sandai, aiming at Sanji's chest while Yubashiri was aimed at the junction between his knees. It snaked around Sanji's body and wedged itself between his knees. Almost immediately, Zoro pulled and Sanji forced himself to bend over backwards and stand up a bit away from Zoro.

"That thing's sharp," said Sanji.

"All the better to slice you with, my dear," Zoro teased before lunging forward and using both swords to attack at Sanji's arms. Sanji backed away and lifted his foot to fight, but Zoro held it in place with his two swords. Sanji's leg was now caught between both blades. If Sanji moved, he'd probably cut himself somewhere and then there'd be blood.

Unlike Sanji, when Zoro fought, he didn't need to protect any part of his body and so this gave him free-range. He kicked at Sanji's abdomen but the blond leaned back. Then, somehow that Zoro couldn't describe, Sanji's hands came out and planted on the floor. He used them to lift himself up, while his foot was still stuck between Zoro's swords, forcing Zoro's arms to move with his foot as it lifted over Sanji's head and finally, slammed down onto the floor behind him.

The swords wedged themselves into the floorboards and Sanji aimed a kick at Zoro's chin, causing the man to stagger back. He took a blow to the stomach before one of his hands wrapped tightly around Sandai. With a forceful tug, he pulled the sword out and attacked Sanji with it. Sanji, more familiar with Zoro fighting single-sword style, easily dodged.

Zoro then kicked at Sanji's feet, but it did nothing to waver the man. Zoro made an attempt at a slicing through Sanji's shirt, but Sanji dodged. Dodging it though caused Sanji to hit the floor and with those few seconds it took Sanji to get up, Zoro took Yubashiri out from the floor.

Once Sanji was standing, Zoro used the hilt of the sword to hit Sanji forcefully in the ribs, causing him to lose his breath and stagger slightly. Zoro then took the other sword and made a quick cut across Sanji's waist area. A belt loop in his pants broke off.

Zoro smirked, satisfied but Sanji then launched himself at Zoro, kicking at Zoro's chest. Zoro fell backwards, winded. Sanji took aim and kicked squarely where Zoro's neck was. It stung like a bitch. Hoarse and having slight difficultly breathing, Sanji was sure that Zoro couldn't make another move, but Zoro drove his sword into the ground next to Sanji's feet. The cook backed up and Zoro regained his balance, breathing heavily.

 _DING, DONG! DING, DONG!_

The two paused in their fight and Zoro took the sword out of the floor. Brushing his brow, he sent Sanji a glare. "This isn't over yet."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Sanji replied with a smirk.

Zoro opened the apartment door to see Luffy and Nami standing before them.

Luffy looked at Zoro strangely, then turned to Nami. "They aren't having sex, Nami. I told you they were fighting."

Zoro blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. Then—

"WHAT THE FUCK?!"

Luffy grinned at him. "Nami told me you two were having sex," he said. "Because she came by yesterday and heard lots of yelling and grunting, but I told her that wasn't likely since you're like a virgin and probably wouldn't want to embarrass yourself in front of an experienced person like Sanji," Luffy told him.

"I reiterate, WHAT THE FUCK?!"

Sanji walked over at that moment and grinned, seeing Nami. "Hello, sweetheart," he said with a smile.

Zoro had learnt pretty early on Sanji had a weakness for good looking women. It annoyed him to no end. He was training Sanji so he'd get better, not so he could flirt with girls! Logically speaking, Zoro knew his thought process made no sense, but he wasn't willing to admit it. Sanji's flirting and his process in training had nothing to do with each other.

Nami frowned. "I was hoping I'd see something good," she said with a sigh. "You're disappointing, Zoro."

"What? How the fuck am I disappointing? And what the fuck made you think we were having sex?" he demanded.

Sanji froze at the word, his entire body stilling.

Zoro wasn't sure why it was. There were tons of reasons why Sanji could've frozen up. It could've been because of the cooks, or it could've been because of the way Zoro had said it. It could've been because of the way Sanji seemed to be doing so well, only to fall back down. Was sex just a touchy subject for the blond? Zoro didn't really care, he didn't plan on talking to Sanji about it any time soon, or ever really, anyway.

"Look, why are you here?"

"To confirm what Nami said," Luffy said with a shrug. "But now that we're here, can you make me some pork chops?" he asked Sanji.

Sanji stared at him. "Do I look like your personal chef to you?"

"No," Luffy said, "but you're Zoro's. Can't I steal him for one meal?" Luffy begged.

Sanji was Zoro's personal chef? He hadn't thought of it that way. In fact, that thought had never crossed his mind. But if he thought a bit more about it, it did make sense. Using possessive pronouns when it came to the blond … no one owned him, that was the whole point of his being away the Baratie. No one was in control of him and no one had any say in what he did. The whole leaving the Baratie thing was like an act of rebellion. An act of rebellion that Zoro had to force Sanji into doing, but an act of rebellion nonetheless. Which meant that there should be no possessive pronouns when it came to Sanji. But why did hearing Sanji was _his_ personal chef make him this happy?

Sanji sighed. "What kind of pork chops, Luffy?" asked Sanji.

The bastard was going to make Luffy pork chops? That wasn't fair! Sanji had never made Zoro pork chops! But then again, Sanji had never made Luffy a whole feast either. For some reason, that made the swordsman feel triumphant over the captain.

"Good ones," Luffy said with a big grin.

Nami welcomed herself in, collapsing on Zoro's couch while Luffy followed Sanji into the kitchen. She was silent for a while before she turned to him. "So, you took my advice?"

If Zoro ever admitted Nami was right, he would surely die. Instead, he turned away and started looking for the TV remote.

 _It's for the sake of rent,_ he told himself. _We just need to pay rent_. But paying rent probably wouldn't be a problem if he just let Sanji pay in the first place. But just because Zoro was providing hospitality and shelter didn't mean Sanji had to provide payment for rent. At least, not alone. Heck, if Zoro met anyone who cooked like Sanji, then he'd take them under his wing in a second if it meant eating their food daily.

 _That's a lie and you know it._

The reason why Zoro let Sanji in … Zoro wasn't even sure why. Sometimes he'd wonder why he had decided to abduct the cook in the first place. He told himself it was because the cook was going to die there otherwise, but back then the cook had been like a stranger. If Zoro were to see a guy being mugged on the street, sure, he'd try to help him, but he wouldn't let him into his house and give him a bed and crappy soup.

 _Does that make Sanji special?_

The cook himself was special in his own right. Kicking ass and not even knowing he could do it. The way he cooked, the way he spoke, the way he fucking moved, was special in some way or another and when he fought … Zoro nearly shivered at the thought. When Sanji fought he put everything he had into it, like his cooking. It was passionate, it was fiery and it was just like pure dynamite.

"Thinking about Sanji?"

Zoro was pulled out of his thoughts by Nami. He sent her a glare. "Come on, tell me the real reason you're here," he snapped.

Nami shook her head. "It's just like Luffy says, we wanted to check if you were getting laid or not."

"Liar."

Nami sighed. "Fine. I had another reason, I'll admit, but my main reason was to see if you were getting it on," she added. Shoving her hand deep into her pocket, she pulled out a wad of cash. "It's Sanji's share. For his past fights."

Zoro stared at it. "How much is this?"

"Collectively? About 5 million," Nami said with a shrug.

Zoro stared at the bills and then at Sanji. Did he really bring in that much money?

* * *

Luffy, Zoro decided, had to have worse table manners than Zoro.

He watched, amused, as Sanji tried his hardest not to show any sign of repulsion for the way Luffy ate. It was clearly beyond messy and he just seemed to stick his face into his plate and eat it all up, without a single thought.

"Good?" Sanji asked.

Zoro had heard Sanji ask him that question over a million times before.

Luffy nodded, swallowing thickly before giving him a thumbs up sign. "Awesome!"

Sanji turned to Zoro. "We might not have enough meat for tonight though," he admitted. "I wanted to make steak, but it seems as though Luffy's cleared out most of our meat storage."

Luffy had the decency to look at least a little apologetic. "Sorry."

"It's fine," Sanji told him. "I can just have Zoro here pick me up some more tomorrow." He patted Zoro on the shoulder and smirked. "Isn't that right, Zoro?"

"Since when am I your maid?" Zoro demanded.

"I never said you were my maid. Think of it more as … a dog who fetches me food."

Luffy burst out laughing just then, pointing at Zoro. "You … as a dog!" he managed to say through his fit of laughter.

Nami couldn't help but giggle a bit too. "I can picture it now. Zoro's a green dog with large canine ears and sharp teeth but he wags his tail whenever Sanji feeds him left overs."

Zoro frowned. "It's not that funny," Zoro snapped.

"It kind of is," Sanji told him. "Don't pout, I think you'd make an adorable dog."

 _Adorable? Adorable how? Adorable like you want to pinch my cheeks and cuddle? Or adorable like that little girl who's throwing rocks at that boy she likes is adorable, isn't young love grand adorable? Is it a good kind of adorable or a bad kind? Fuck, what am I thinking?_

Zoro ate the rest of his meal in silence.

* * *

"Oh my, three sheaths today? Does that mean I get to fight the amazing Wado?"

"Shut up, asshole," Zoro snapped.

"How do you plan on fighting with three swords if you only have two hands?" Sanji asked.

"That," Zoro replied, placing Wado in her usual spot, "is what a mouth is for."

Sanji stared at him.

Zoro took Sandai and Yubashiri out of their sheaths and readied himself while Sanji continued to stare at him. "What?" he asked through the sword.

"You know, most people would look stupid like that," Sanji said. "But for some reason, you don't."

"Glad to know, can we get started?" Zoro muttered through the sword.

And then they started.

Like they had been doing for the past month, Zoro attacked first. Sanji seemed more aware of all the blades than usual. He dodged, being careful to avoid being struck by any of them. Zoro ran towards the confident cook and caught his leg mid-kick in between two of his swords. Using his third one, he cut down Sanji's leg, tearing the hem of his pants.

Sanji backed away from Zoro.

With a fierce kick, he aimed for Zoro's head, but Zoro quickly repositioned himself so that if Sanji went through with his kick, he'd end up being struck by one, or more of Zoro's blades. Sanji had to stop himself and this resulted in an imbalance. He gritted his teeth and took another kick at Zoro, who dodged and countered by using two of his swords to press Sanji up against the wall and the third was dangerously close to Sanji's throat.

Sanji kicked at Zoro's chest, causing the swordsman to stumble back and then, using a handspring, he rested himself on Zoro's shoulders, wrapping his legs around Zoro's head. Zoro raised his swords and threw one up into the air, Sandai, right above his head. Sanji jumped off of him and Zoro dodged the blade as it fell. He caught it once more and then readied himself to attack again.

Sanji stepped on Zoro's toe harshly, then brought one of his legs around and kicked Zoro's knee joint. Zoro's knees buckled and he was left to be resting on one knee. Sanji then kicked at Zoro's back, trying to send the swordsman forward, but Zoro countered by quickly turning his body and pressing against Sanji's foot with his swords.

"Tired?" asked Zoro.

"You wish!"

Sanji bounced off of Zoro's sword and put himself into a corner, considering his strategies. This just meant that he was already backed up.

Zoro made a thrusting motion towards Sanji, but then Sanji did something that surprised him.

Sanji pushed off the wall and flipped. One of his feet came out and struck Wado, kicking so harshly that Zoro's mouth opened in shock and the sword fell out of his mouth. Sanji then stood with his hands in his pockets behind Zoro.

Zoro turned around slowly and glared at him.

Never in all his years had Wado ever suffered such damage. He had never dropped her, never mistreated her. The white katana didn't have a scratch on her that Zoro didn't know exactly how it go there and he polished it himself, not trusting others to look after her. Wado was never thrown aside, no matter what the fight. He had been reluctant to bring her to the bar when the fights had first started, but over time, he grew confident and Wado had yet to be taken from him. Instead though, now Sanji had just thrown Wado away, as though she were trash or just another obstacle in his way.

As Zoro slowly stepped closer to Sanji, he gently put down his swords as he went. Crossing the large distance of the make-shift dojo, Zoro disarmed himself of his swords one by one. When he was finally in front of Sanji, he watched the blond's Adam's apple bob as he gulped.

"Zoro …"

There was something about the way Sanji's lips said his name, the way the word came out sounding breathless. With shaking hands, Zoro reached out to Sanji. He placed a hand on Sanji's cheek and looked into those blue eyes. He wasn't sure what to do, his heart was beating so fast. He let his fingers trace over a small bruise before his hand went lower, tracing the outline of Sanji's lips. Sanji's eyes held so much conflict in them, like he wasn't sure what to do. He bit his bottom lip, biting Zoro's finger softly in the process. Zoro held in a groan. He could see the confusion in Sanji's eyes, the fear. The blond looked like he wanted to step away while at the same time, he couldn't move. Zoro didn't let himself think, thinking was overrated anyway. Instead, he just let himself feel.

His eyes closed, as did the gap.

Soft.

Sanji's lips felt soft. He didn't want to see the terror or confusion on Sanji's face, so he kept his eyes firmly shut as his lips gently slid over Sanji's. There was barely any contact, like the ghost of a breath touching his lips. Sanji stayed frozen and Zoro's lips stayed still for a moment. He waited. His hand that had been tracing Sanji's lips gently rose to cup his cheek, pulling him closer slightly, but Zoro didn't press, he didn't push. He waited for a response.

When he felt the slightest twitch under his lips, Zoro pressed just a little harder. One of his callused hands snaked their way around Sanji's body, wrapping around his waist—

 _RING! RING!_

The phone rang. The fucking phone rang.

Zoro was tempted to ignore it and tried to pull Sanji a little bit closer, but the ringing wouldn't stop. Finally, he let go of Sanji's lips and stared down at his phone at the cursed caller ID.

Ace fucking Portgas was going to fucking die.

Flipping his phone open, he heard the sound of struggling and then Sanji was out of his grasp and away from him. Zoro felt cold, as though he had taken an icy shower and it sent shivers down his spine.

"What?!" he demanded.

"Zoro, is now a bad time?" At least the bastard had the sense to sound apologetic.

Zoro turned to see Sanji walking into the kitchen. His back was to him and Zoro felt an overwhelming sensation of loss. "No," he said through gritted teeth. The blond was just going to get himself a knife and began to cut up vegetables like nothing had fucking happened. Like Zoro's heart wasn't racing a million miles per hour.

"You sure?"

Zoro sighed and shut his eyes, turning away from Sanji. "Yeah, I'm sure. It was nothing. What's up?"

Had he turned around, he would've seen the way Sanji's hand shook as he cut the peppers.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : The thanks for the reviews!_

 _lilcutieprincess : I've written a bit more, like maybe, 300 words more, but it's not really moving since I'm not used to the style I wanted to try. Though I will admit I know Naruto more than **One Piece** , the thing is that I still feel the only anime/manga I know like the back of my hand is **Bleach** and I'm a little nervous about anything I write concerning anime that isn't **Bleach**._

 _JustCallMeLucie : The reason for the phone incident is simple: I realized that Sanji had no cell phone because, as he explained, why would he need one? But then I thought a bit more and once I was writing him inside that phone booth, I was like, "does Sanji know the apartment's number?" And then it was just like, since he's never left the apartment all that much, then maybe Zoro just thought he didn't need it and maybe Sanji just sort of forgot to ask for it. I don't think he expected to be caught in the rain._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : Zoro has always been a character with anger management problems in my opinion. This makes him amusing my standards and so, he has random outbursts._

 _Dyloa : That makes sense. It'd be weird if Baratie just totally and completely changed it's name in French, considering its the name of a place. I feel kinda stupid for not realizing that. I will be reading your story, or at least, reading it and trying to understand it, I hope I do understand it though because I do love a healthy dose of angst! Nah, Sanji's got money cause he doesn't spend the money he gets all that often. For example, if Zeff pays him like, a thousand a month, Sanji goes grocery shopping like, twice a month. He doesn't spend all that money on food, therefore, Sanji has a lot of money. I'm sorry that this chapter probably didn't answer questions you wanted it to, but I'm pretty satisfied with it. I hope you liked it anyway!_

 _Okay, just about everyone thinks Sanji is the uke. I'll tell you this: while yes, I do like Sanji as an uke, I also like the idea of big, strong Zoro on his back, pleading to cum because of Sanji. As a result, in terms of Sanji and Zoro's relationship (much like the way I viewed Naruto and Sasuke's) I'm fine with either of them being the seme. Here's the thing: I personally like it when a guy can do both things. I remember reading a **Fairy Tail** story about Natsu and Gray and it said something along the lines of, "Anyone can stick a cock into a hole and fuck them, it takes a real man to take it up the ass" and I think that's true. The story I believe, was called Fight Dancing or something like that, it was awesome, if you like Fairy Tail, you should read it, if you like Natsu and Gray cause that story is just adorable with the perfect amount of smut in it. So is the story **Dangerous Drugs**. But anyway, moving on: about this story. In this story, there will be BOTH Sanji and Zoro topping, so that means that between Zoro and Sanji, you will be getting at LEAST two different sex scenes. But anyway ..._

 _Now for my question: first: **What did Zoro say? By the way, no Google Translate, if that wasn't obvious.**_

 _Second question: **If it were the Zombie Apocalypse and you had to have either Luffy, Zoro or Sanji by your side at all times as your survival partner, and you could ONLY PICK ONE, who would you have?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	14. Twenty Questions, Limited Answers

_**Author's Note:** Okay, so yeah, I said longer chapters. I lied in this case. I also made Sanji know a bit more about what I call American/Canadian YouTube, cause I don't know if they have that channel in Japan. Also, because I was watching it a few days ago and it kind of inspired this chapter. I don't own **One Piece** , I know the story kind of got away from me a bit. I messed around a bit with them. I'm not good at writing about drunk people so... yeah. I can't believe I have the same number of reviews as thousand words in this story. I really didn't think it would be that popular, but I'm really glad about this! I swear the next chapter will be longer! Thanks for the reviews, the results of who wants who in the Zombie apocalypse and another question are to be found below._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNING: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Mentions of rape, abuse, suicidal thoughts (I actually don't remember if that's in here, but it might be)**

 **Drinking**

* * *

Chapter 14: 20 Questions, Limited Answers

* * *

 _Why? Why, why, whywhywhy?!_

Sanji couldn't make sense of it. He was shaken up. No, he was beyond shaken up. He was thrown into a blender on high speed, then shaken by hand while the blender kept spinning, the blades hitting him every which way, before he was placed in some giant stirring pot where some evil old hag continued to spin him around, cackling. He was knew that ridiculous scenario was more than impossible, but that's what it felt like.

Why had Zoro kissed him?

At first when it happened, Sanji thought it was a dream. He thought he had some strange, screwed up dream that involved his usual nightmare with the cooks and their abuse but when it was over and Sanji had time to reflect on it while his shaking hands attempted to cut the damn vegetables, he realized it was impossible because no dream about the cooks— no dream in general, ever involved such … kindness.

Zoro hadn't been forceful. He hadn't been rough and he hadn't pressured Sanji into anything. Sure, the kiss came as a surprise but he didn't make Sanji do anything. He didn't make Sanji kiss him back and he didn't press the kiss any farther than it was already. Sanji could've moved away. He had space, he had the whole freaking alcove to move around, but he hadn't. _Why hadn't he moved?_

Sanji stared out the window, still refusing to look in the mirror and gently raised a hand to his lips.

Fuck, he probably looked like some girl, but the truth was … that had been Sanji's first kiss.

Sanji enjoyed flirting but flirting with customers at a restaurant and having a relationship were two completely different things. Most of the time, the girls either blew him off as a pesky flirt or they'd indulge him in a few minutes of banter before he returned to the kitchen. In all that time, there had never been time for a kiss. Perhaps Moodie gave him the occasional peck on the cheek, but no one had ever kissed him like that.

It felt so … _wrong_.

First of all, most people had their first kiss before their first time. Perhaps Sanji was just backwards. But even if they didn't, wasn't their first time with someone who was their first kiss? At least, Sanji liked to think it was that way. But what was so wrong was the way Zoro had kissed him and when Sanji thought about the cooks.

It had been so different.

The cooks were rough and ruthless. They didn't give a damn if Sanji started bleeding on the floor or if he was close to tears. They didn't care if they hurt him or his ass. They didn't care if he screamed or cried for help, if he told them he'd call someone or if he'd get Zeff to fire them all. They didn't care.

What Zoro had done was so different. It had been gentle and caring, kind and thoughtful. It had been innocent. The lightest brush of lips against each other and it made Sanji want to cry at the sweetness of it. Did he even deserve such care? Just gentleness? After all, he was tainted. He was toxic. Who would want someone like him? Left over goods, a dirty, filthy piece of garbage left on the street?

When Zoro had kissed him, Sanji had been in shock. His whole body had shook, his whole mind had gone blank and he hadn't been able to move. His eyes were wide open when Zoro leaned in and the look on the swordsman's face was one of peace, as though he didn't have any troubles. Sanji had let his eyelids slide close, had let himself move just a little closer, holding in tears.

 _What if Zoro had been the one who ..?_

Sanji shook his head. That was wishful thinking. Besides, the man said he wasn't even gay, there was no way he'd want to do _that_ with Sanji.

Would he?

 _Fuck, this is so confusing!_

Sanji ran his fingers through his hair and let his head fall back, trying to calm the racing thoughts. Nothing made sense, nothing was grounded. He was sure he was going to go insane with the thoughts that infiltrated his mind and left him wondering desperately. He couldn't make sense of what Zoro had done.

Had Zoro meant to kiss him? Or was he caught up in the moment? But regardless of how caught up you are, you don't just kiss a man if you're not gay, right? But Zoro himself said it many times, he _wasn't_ gay. But … Sanji shook his head. The cook wasn't even sure of his own sexuality, so questioning Zoro's seemed pointless. He knew for sure he hadn't liked what the other cooks had been doing, he knew he also appreciated feminine beauty, but what about other men?

Zoro wasn't like the cooks. That thought kept repeating itself loudly in his mind. He wasn't like the cooks and when Zoro had kissed him it was different. It wasn't unpleasant, but the kiss hadn't been long enough to call it good. Did that mean he was gay? But no, he appreciated the way Nami walked and her giggle. Did that make him bisexual?

 _Fuck, am I really trying to figure out my sexuality based on some lousy kiss?_

But it hadn't been lousy.

Shit, he could go on like this for the entire day if he let himself.

He needed answers. Concrete ones. Ones that there was no denying them. And Sanji thought he had a way.

* * *

"Get a glass, get the beer, and get a chair."

Zoro stared at Sanji, confused. "What?"

"We're going to play a little game," Sanji said. "Ever heard of Cut Video?" he asked while Zoro continued to stand motionless and speechless before him. "It's a YouTube channel where they play a game called 'Truth or Drink'. We're going to play."

"What?" Zoro repeated. He shook his head profusely. "I'm quitting," he reminded him for what seemed like the thousandth time. "And besides, what kind of beer? You know some beers are more intoxicating than others," he added.

"Then don't drink," Sanji told him. "Just talk to me," he said with a shrug. "You can't go against this idea since we already did your weird-ass psychoanalysis thing. I'll tell you how we'll play and then we'll get started, all right? You can't back out, I went along with your therapist-for-a-day scheme so you're going along with mine!"

"But mine didn't involve me getting you drunk!" Zoro snapped.

"As if you could get me drunk," Sanji snorted.

"Have you ever had anything other than light champagne?"

Sanji looked away.

"Exactly."

"Look would you just get the beer? I don't know where it is," Sanji snapped. "I'll get the glasses and we'll start, all right?"

Zoro grumbled the entire time as he took out some beer bottles from some dark corner of the fridge that Sanji had never noticed while Sanji got two shot glasses and set up the chairs across from each other on the kitchen table. Zoro took a seat and crossed his arms. "Fine, we're set up. Let's just get this over with."

"You know the game 'Twenty Questions'?"

Zoro nodded. "So?"

"So we're going to play a mix between 'Truth or Drink' and 'Twenty Questions'. Basically, the way 'Truth or Drink' works is that someone asks you a question and you have two options, to either tell them the truth, or to take a shot."

"The name's kind of self-explanatory," Zoro pointed out. "Look, I already know how to play 'Twenty Questions', so can we just start?"

"No, I'm not done yet!" Sanji told him. "Anyway, you can pass as many questions as you want in our game, but you have to answer a total of twenty before the game is over, understood? I don't care how intoxicated you become, you will answer a total of twenty," he added. "We each have to answer twenty so at least forty questions will be asked, fair?"

"What if someone passes out in the middle of the game?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow. "And how do you determine a winner?"

"Are there ever any real winners in drinking games?"

Zoro bit the inside o this cheek and turned away.

"Okay, do you want to start?" Sanji asked. "I have a piece of paper here," he gestured towards the small scrap on the table. There was a T-chart on it with the letters _S_ and _Z_ on it. "It'll help us keep track of the number of answered questions," he said.

"Fine, I'll start," Zoro said. "You and your cracked up games …" He seemed to think for a moment. "Okay. What's your last name?"

"Seriously?"

"I don't know it, you know mine," Zoro said. "It seems like a fair question."

"Don't have one."

As Sanji put a tally of one underneath his letter on the T-chart, he could already tell Zoro was going to scream.

 _"Don't have one?"_ And there it was. "What the fuck do you mean you don't have one?" The swordsman shook his head. "Not possible, everyone has one! Everyone!"

"Okay, maybe I should be more specific. It's not that I don't have one, it's that I don't remember it," Sanji said. It was true, as far as Sanji was concerned his name was Sanji and that's where the name started and ended. He had no extension to his name, no middle or last one. When you were a system kid like he was, you learnt it didn't matter to have a last name. It'd change every few months anyway and eventually, you'd be nameless once more when you got back. You always came back because no one ever wanted you. After Zeff he just didn't feel like he needed one. It wasn't like he had any special paperwork or anything he needed to sign, there was no reason to have one. Last names were trivial. "Happy?" Zoro gaped at him, but Sanji pushed forward. He knew instantly what he wanted to ask Zoro, but he decided to wait before he jumped onto his main reason for the game. "How'd you get those three piercings?"

Zoro scoffed. "Sixteenth birthday," Zoro said with a shrug. "I wanted to look cool, so I figured—"

"The best way to become cool is to bullet three holes into your ear," Sanji finished dryly.

"Hey, you asked!"

Sanji put another tally next to Zoro's name.

"Okay," Zoro said slowly. "Why'd you start cooking in the first place?"

Sanji thought about it. What did he have to lose telling Zoro? He bit his bottom lip and mulled over his words. What should he say? "I … don't want anyone to go hungry," he said finally. "I know hunger. And it's not pleasant. So I want to help prevent any hunger for others as much as I can," he shrugged. "And if I can only help those in front of me, that's better than doing nothing, isn't it?"

Zoro stared at him. "You know what, Sanji?"

"What, Zoro?"

"You're pretty deep, when you want to be."

Sanji didn't know what to say so instead, he marked another tally. "Who did that sword belong to?" Sanji asked. "Wado, the white katana."

Zoro looked at him. He opened his mouth to answer, but closed it again. He stared at the glass and the bottle of beer. "I …" He seemed at a loss for words. Sanji watched in silence as Zoro took a deep breath to calm his head. He said nothing, knowing Zoro needed to think about this. "I can't tell you that. Not yet."

Sanji nodded and gestured towards the glass.

Zoro winced. He looked away from it and frowned. "I don't want to drink."

"Then tell me."

"I can't!"

Zoro's voice cracked at his words and Sanji's eyes widened. Zoro turned his head away, smacking his hands against the table he stood up abruptly. He looked … fuck, Zoro looked close to tears. "I can't tell you right now," Zoro repeated, his fists clenching. "Maybe I could some other time, but don't make me do this right now."

Sanji didn't want to press the shot into Zoro's hands, but that was the way it worked. Those were the rules, not that there were many.

"I'll drink it," Sanji offered. "This time, I'll drink it for you, but next time you've got to drink."

Zoro nodded, swallowing. He looked like he had just run a marathon, his breathing uneven. He was clearly shaken. Zoro bit the inside of his cheek as Sanji tossed his head back and drank. The beer burned his throat. He personally hated alcohol, he thought on a meal, it was good with small portions, but the rawness of it as it warmed and scorched his esophagus wasn't something he'd like to experience on a daily basis. How Zoro used to drink all the time was beyond him. Then again, many said the same about his smoking.

Zoro blinked a few times, as though trying to hold back tears before he spoke again. "How long have you worked at the Baratie?"

"Fourteen years."

That was three under Sanji, one under Zoro.

"Have you ever had a girlfriend?" Sanji wasn't that curious. Just a little.

"Yes."

Three Sanji, two Zoro.

"Have _you_ ever had a girlfriend?" Zoro asked.

"You can't do that!" Sanji told him, rolling his eyes.

"Can't do what?"

"You can't just ask me a question I already asked," Sanji said.

Zoro scoffed. "Really?"

"Really!"

Zoro shook his head. "I'm not changing my question."

Sanji bit his lip. "Fine. I don't know why you're curious, but no, I haven't."

Zoro raised an eyebrow in shock. "Really?"

"Yes really, now can we move on?"

"It's your question."

Oh. Right. Sanji knew that. Fighting down a blush, Sanji tried to think of something. Anything to ask Zoro. "Why'd you kiss me?" he blurted out. It was the only thing on his mind, wondering why it was that Zoro had done it. It made no sense to him, whatsoever. He couldn't stand not knowing what was going on in that simple mind of that marimo's, so why was this so hard to understand?

Zoro blinked. "What?"

"You heard me. Why did you kiss me?"

Zoro shook his head and took the glass, throwing it back like an expert. He may not have had any serious alcohol in a while, but the man still remembered how to drink a shot. He leaned back forward, the glass hitting the table with a loud _thud_. He wiped the back of his mouth with his arm and smirked. "Who's the head chef at your restaurant?"

"It's not my restaurant," Sanji told Zoro, rolling his eyes.

"You work at it—"

"I haven't worked there in weeks thanks to you," Sanji reminded him. Though he tried to sound venomous, he couldn't do it. If he really thought about it, where would he be now if Zoro hadn't taken him in? Probably on the kitchen floor, considering the time it was, holding his stomach. He might have been covered in cum again, he'd definitely be crying after trying to hold it in for hours. Would he have cut? Most definitely. God, had he always been this depressing? Shoving that thought out of his mind, he decided to answer Zoro's question. "His name's Zeff," Sanji said. "How'd you get into kendo?"

"A friend."

Sanji: five. Zoro: three.

"You're very vague you know," Sanji told him.

"Fine, a close friend."

"That makes everything more specific, doesn't it?" Sanji shook his head. "Never mind. You ask."

"You said where you lived before wasn't the kind of place that took kids to the movies. Where did you live?"

Sanji took another shot. "When'd you start drinking?"

Zoro's face scrunched up in thought. "Um, I think I might have been fourteen?" He shook his head. "No, fifteen. I really started drinking the year afterwards."

Sanji: five, Zoro: four.

"Since when do you smoke?" Zoro asked.

"Nine."

Six, four.

"Why do you drink?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow. "You're an athlete, I don't think it's good for your liver."

"Worried about me, cook?" Zoro challenged.

"You wish."

Zoro seemed to think for a moment. "No idea, really, I'm pretty sure I had a reason, but that was so long ago, I don't even remember anymore." He shrugged. "Not all that important now anyways."

Six, five.

"Your parents, who were they?" Zoro asked. "Some show off cooks or something?"

"Didn't know them."

Seven, five.

"I'm sorry."

Sanji looked at Zoro strangely. "What are you sorry about?" He frowned. "You didn't kill them, did you?"

"What? No!"

"I was kidding," Sanji said. "It's not your fault, there's no reason to be sorry. I hate when people apologize for no reason." He took a deep inhalation of his cigarette. "Wastes my time assuring them there's nothing wrong, which of course makes them think something is wrong. Not everyone's trying to play a big game of reverse psychology, you know." He shook his head. "Anyway, how do you keep out of the press? I did a search on you a while after you started coming to the Baratie frequently, wanted to know if you were bad for the restaurant—"

"I was a paying customer! Besides, what makes you think I'm a bad person? Do I look like some serial murderer or something?"

Sanji chewed on his cigarette.

"Very funny," Zoro said dryly.

"Anyway, there weren't any rumours or shit like that about you in the press. How'd you keep out of it?" Sanji asked.

"You curious?"

"Interested, more like it," Sanji corrected him.

"So you're entertained?"

Sanji smirked. "What do you think?"

Zoro thought about it. "I don't know, it's not that hard to keep out of the press. I just don't give away any personal information, like my address and just avoid the public in general. They rarely ever see me if I'm not at some competition of some sort, so I guess I just never gave them a chance to start rumours."

Seven, six.

Zoro bit his bottom lip in thought.

"Can't think of anything?" Sanji asked.

"No, I'm just trying to chose my words carefully." Zoro thought a little longer. "Why … why didn't you leave? The Baratie, I mean."

Sanji took a shot.

"Oh come on, if you don't answer any of the questions I want answers to, then what's the point of this game?" Zoro asked.

 _Well you didn't my questions either. What's the big deal with that sword? And why did you kiss me? Why won't you tell me?_

The game went on like this for a while and by the time the score was sixteen for Sanji, seventeen for Zoro, Zoro seemed pretty wasted.

Sanji wasn't doing any better either. His vision was starting to become a little hazy and it took a lot of effort not to fall out of his seat. He wasn't used to alcohol and he was sure that as soon as the game was over, he was going to hurl everything out. Maybe sooner, if the game didn't speed along faster. They still had a few questions to go, four for Sanji and three for Zoro. For nearly two hours they had been at it, Zoro stubbornly refusing to answer many questions while Sanji just didn't feel comfortable answering others. He felt as though his tongue was getting a bit loose, or maybe it was just too big for his mouth now so he found himself answering more questions than he thought he would, but he avoided all questions that closely reminded him of the Baratie. It seemed though the drunker they got, the less important the questions were.

"Mine turn!"

Zoro frowned. "My turn."

"S'not your turn, it's mine turn!" Sanji told him, rolling his eyes. He felt dizzy doing so, the whole room spinning. _Note to self, don't roll your eyes even when the Marimo's being an idiot, doing so may lead to eyeballs falling out of their sockets._

"Grammar!" Zoro whined. "S'not mine turn, it's my turn. But it's your turn so go!"

Sanji didn't even try to make sense of what Zoro had just said. He had given up on understanding the swordsman. "Hm, okay …" He tilted his head slightly and looked at the green-haired man from a different angle. He had a strong jaw-line and his features were sharp, but they didn't look cutting. His hair was soft, if Sanji remembered right. Reaching out without even giving it a thought, Sanji let his fingers trail through Zoro's hair. Yup, his hair was soft. "Why's your hair so fluffy?" he asked.

"S'not fluffy!"

"Yes it is!"

"No, s'not, take that back!"

Zoro was pouting! Dear God, the man crossed his arms over his chest and his bottom lip was pursed outwards. There was no denying the fact that Zoro Roronoa was pouting. Sanji couldn't help but let out a laugh. "You look funny!"

"You look funny!" Zoro snapped back. "And if my hair really is fluffy, which it's not—"

"Yes it is, Marimo!"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "It's not, but if it _is_ , which I repeat, it's _not_ , cause you're delusional and shit, it's probably cause of the weird shampoo Nami keeps getting me."

Sanji laughed again. If he hadn't lost his mind and knew what he was doing, then he'd realize he sounded like he was on helium and would go and die in a corner out of embarrassment accordingly but apparently, Sanji's good mind was gone off on vacation with nothing more than a Post-It note on the door before leaving him without his inhibitions. "A girl buys your shampoo!" he said with another laugh.

"Shuddup!" Zoro slurred. He stared at the cook before saying, "Hey Sanji?"

"Hmm?"

"Why're you so pretty?"

Sanji blinked.

He felt as though he had suddenly sobered up at Zoro's words, but it was obvious the swordsman was already gone. "Pretty?" he repeated. "Whaddya mean?"

"I dunno," Zoro said. He laid back on the table, taking a strand of Sanji's hair and wrapping it around his fingers. "Your hair's kinda long, ya know?"

Sanji shook his head. "You're just blind," he assured him.

"But I dunno, you look pretty sometimes," Zoro mumbled.

"Sometimes?" Sanji repeated, a small part of his brain actually processing this conversation and labelling it as important. "What do ya mean sometimes?"

"Like … like when you fight," Zoro said. "Like when ya beat someone up, you look real happy." He shrugged, pulling at Sanji's hair again, forcing the blond to come even closer. He could smell the alcohol on Zoro's breath. Zoro let out a laugh as Sanji's breath tickled his nose before he stopped and their eyes connected. He seemed to sober up for a moment. "Hey Sanji?"

"Yeah?"

"You have a really pretty eye."

Sanji's breath hitched. What was Zoro saying? Did Zoro even know what he was saying? Did Sanji know what Zoro was saying?

Instead of dwelling on it, he let out a chuckle. "Oh yeah? Only one?"

"Bastard, that's cause I can only see one!" Zoro told him. He rolled a little more and Sanji backed up. Zoro fell off the table onto the floor with a thud. "Fucking hard floors," he muttered, standing back up. "Whose question was it?"

 _Question? What's he talking about? We need to ask questions?_ But then Sanji remembered his proposal which seemed so far away to him and he nodded, thinking back. "Mine," he said.

Eighteen for Zoro, sixteen for Sanji. Or was it seventeen? Had he really answered why he was pretty? He wasn't sure. Eh, didn't matter really, did it?

"Hmm…. oi! Marimo, is all your hair really green?"

Zoro shook his head. "'ve already told ya, it's green!"

"All of it?"

"All of it!"

Sanji smirked and raised an eyebrow. "Prove it!"

Zoro seemed to think for a moment. Then he stood up and began to pull off his shirt.

Sanji was shocked, unable to say a single thing. Zoro seemed to be having trouble getting the shirt over his head, fighting with it before the white shirt ended up in a tangle heap somewhere on the floor.

Sanji stared.

Zoro was … well, Zoro was fit. Not that he really expected anything less from the swordsman but still … There were grooves and dips in Zoro's chest, an obvious six-pack. It was amazing. Sanji stepped closer and gently slid his hands across Zoro's chest, feeling it under his fingers. He barely realized what he was doing and his brain didn't seem to process any of his movements, didn't even seem to register what Sanji was doing. He could see a small trail of green hair leading towards Zoro's crotch area. He stared at it, letting his hands slide over Zoro's triceps when he heard a strange sound. Laughter.

Zoro was laughing.

"S-stop that!" Zoro said, laughing harshly. He gave Sanji a light push and the cook landed on the floor with a soft thud. Zoro giggled. He actually giggled. "It's ticklish," he said through his laughter.

"Ticklish?" Sanji repeated. He wanted to test his theory, but Zoro jumped away with speed and steadiness that no drunk person should have. Zoro yawned slightly. Nineteen for Zoro, sixteen for Sanji. Nah, seventeen. He liked to think he was closer to the swordsman's score than that.

"Okay, my question!" Zoro said. "You stay on that side!" he added, pointing towards the side of the table Sanji was at. "Don't come closer." He seemed to think for a minute. "Did you like it?"

"Like what?" Sanji asked in a haze.

"The kiss."

Sanji stared at Zoro. He couldn't formulate an answer. He couldn't think of one. He knew he hadn't hated it, but he was too confused to come up with a real answer or response to what happened. He couldn't find an emotion he could label to it. He couldn't find a way to describe it. "It was … different," Sanji said.

"But did you _like_ it?" Zoro pressed.

Sanji found his tongue tied, his voice caught in his throat. "I …"

"Cause … I didn't really mind it," Zoro told him. "Dunno, haven't kissed that many different people, so can't really compare that much, but eh …" he shrugged. "Wasn't bad."

 _Wasn't bad?_ Great, was Zoro just asking Sanji to decipher his every word? He couldn't figure it out! He looked at Zoro straight in the eye and repeated the one question he really wanted an answer to. "Why did you do it?"

Zoro looked at him with lazy, tired eyes. "I dunno," Zoro said with a shrug. "Dunno." With that, Zoro fell asleep.

Sanji wanted to smack him and tell him that wasn't an answer, not an acceptable one and not one he was allowed to give. It just wasn't allowed! If Zoro was asleep, that wouldn't stop the urge to pound him that Sanji had, coiling in the bottom of his stomach.

Sanji shook his head. He backed away from Zoro and slowly sat on the floor, leaning his head against one of the table's legs. He tossed his head back and held in a scream. He couldn't figure out how to word this, he couldn't figure out what to think of it. He didn't know why Zoro had kissed him, Zoro didn't know … If Sanji knew _why_ , maybe he could put a name to this strange feeling in his stomach. But he couldn't because Zoro didn't fucking know why himself.

Besides, that made twenty. Zoro didn't have to answer any more questions, even if he was awake.

Sanji reached above him and grabbed the bottle of beer. It was their third bottle and it was nearly empty. Tossing his head back, he drank the rest of the contents, his body fighting against him as he forced himself to swallow its bitter taste. It tasted bitter, it made him shiver with its unpleasantness. But then again, this confusion wasn't pleasant either.

Maybe it was the alcohol, but when Sanji closed his eyes that night, falling asleep on the floor for the first time in nearly two months, he had a single thought, one he wasn't sure if it was because of the alcohol or if it was because of some fucked up Freudian theory.

 _I wish he did it cause he wanted to._

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Now for the thank-yous!_

 _Dyloa : I was totally going to correct it the moment you mentioned it, but I got lazy. I will correct it. Eventually. Oh and about you with a translation, if you want, once I get a full grasp on it, I might want to give a go at translating your story into English some time, if you want._

 _Guest: That's an interesting idea, I wonder what a lady zombie would look like ..._

 _Guest #2: I know, Zoro drinking isn't the greatest thing. I personally prefer characters who stay away from booze and smoking, but Sanji and Zoro are the exception. I know that if Sanji quit smoking though, he wouldn't be Sanji. But I think you'll like a chapter I have planned, though it'll take a long time to get to it about Sanji and his smoking._

 _JustCallMeLucie : I didn't think the kiss was that long to wait for, I mean, I hoped I kept the story interesting so that everyone reading wasn't just like, "I'll just skim through this till we get to a kiss!" so I like to think I kept the audience entertained, but the thing is Zoro and Sanji is a couple who, in my mind, take one step forward and then two steps back so it might take a while for them to be something._

 _candetski : I know, right? I always hate it when others use the term "seme" and "uke" in the sense that it's a set role, I think it's good when people switch it up. I remember reading a **Harry Potter** story about Remus and Sirius and all their friends were like, "who tops?" and then the two turn up and they're like, "Have you ever heard of rotating?"_

 _Sekai Roronoa : YAY! Cause you know, your name IS awesome._

 _lilcutieprincess : I feel very comfortable about very few animes in terms of writing stories about them, and **One Piece** is the one I'm the least certain about, but the fact that people like it anyway, that's great! Once I know the series better, I might write a non-AU story for it. Hopefully, you'll be willing to read it to, if I ever do it._

 _Guest #3: Yeah, I know, people tend to think that. I know that in **Naruto** , I tend to think Naruto is the uke too. I think it's a blond thing._

 _Sabinah : Isn't the whole point of writing with updates so that you can shock your audience? I enjoy making characters adorably awkward, it's my specialty so I hope I managed with Zoro._

 _Nessiebaby : I really like shocking my audience, so I put it there also cause I myself would've gone insane if there wasn't a kiss. But don't worry, their relationship is still developing and will take a while before anything real happens._

 _Guest #4 : I hope when I do write Zoro as an uke, it won't be like those kinds. I'm not that into BDSM and stuff like that. Also, masochism, I like to write about it, but not in terms of sex._

 _Okay, now for the translation of what Zoro said and then who got that right, who people want during the zombie apocalypse and finally, one last question for you guys._

 _Okay so Zoro said, to me: "You're really annoying, did you know that? Really, I don't know how I haven't killed you yet!" and then he said, "I know!". So lilcutieprincess, you were close, but not quite, but Sabinah, you got it! _

_For the zombie apocalypse, here were the results:_

 _Sanji: 1_

 _Zoro: 3_

 _Luffy: 2_

 _I honestly have no clue who I'd chose for the Zombie apocalypse, because if Luffy falls into the water, I'm screwed, but he's really strong. Also, Zoro would be useful, but he gets lost a lot. But he has strong endurance. Sanji would flirt with anything, but he can cook and fight pretty badassly. But I might die from second-hand smoking. I really don't know. Maybe Zoro? But I'm not good at direction either. No clue really._

 _ **QUESTION FOR THIS CHAPTER: WHICH DRUNK DO YOU PREFER? SANJI OR ZORO?** (based on what's present in this chapter. I suck at writing drunk people, so pardon me)_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	15. Epiphany

_**Author's Note:** Okay, so I wrote this chapter in advance and here's the thing about it: this chapter and the next one, chapter 16, are chapters that happen at the exact same time as the other one. So basically, the beginning and ending of this chapter are present in chapter 16, but from Sanji's point of view. This was actually a really fun chapter to write, in my opinion. I hope I got Luffy in character cause you know, on the occasion he has those really deep moments and then resumes being ... well, Luffy, and Nami's just kind of pushy, I know, but I like the way it turned out. Anyway, you might think what Zoro's thinking is going a bit fast, but I like the pace my story's going at because quite frankly, I don't think it's very quick, but it's also not so slow that people are crying, wondering where relationship development and stuff will happen. At least, I hope not. Also, I don't usually write scenes like the one at the end of this chapter, so I hope it turned out okay. I know it's Sanji speaking, which is weird, but it's Zoro's dream so that makes it okay! I think. Anyway, I don't own **One Piece,** I changed this story's name, which I will explain why in the thank-yous below because I don't feel like explaining it up here._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**_  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 15: Epiphany

* * *

Hangovers sucked ass.

It was safe to say Zoro couldn't even remember the real reason why he started drinking in the first place. He hadn't gotten a hangover in so long, he had forgotten what they felt like and the pounding in his head were not welcome. Nor was the cold breeze on his chest. Opening an eye, the entire room spun before it slowly came into focus. He felt around his chest and realized he was shirtless. Why was he shirtless? He couldn't remember. Sanji wouldn't let him make a fool of himself, would he? This wasn't going to be like that one time when Zoro was getting used to alcohol that he woke up in some stranger's backyard with lipstick on his cheek, soaked from head to toe with the fire slowly dying in the in-ground pool, would it? Then again, he was still in his apartment, so that was a good sign.

"Sanji?" Zoro groaned, turning over. He felt the cool of the wood against his back and sighed, this was uncomfortable and his back was starting to hurt. He was a month away from twenty-three, he wasn't allowed to complain about back pain until he was at least in his late forties, earliest.

Using a chair to hoist himself up, Zoro stood upright and saw the world spin once more.

Listening closely, though every sound seemed like a giant megaphone was placed directly in front of his ear, he could hear the sound of … retching?

Wait, what had happened last night?

Sanji had told him to get the beer, they had sat at the table … He got upset when Sanji asked about Kuina and then Sanji had drank a bit and then Zoro had drunk a bit and then … Fuck and then what? Zoro ran his fingers through his hair and a memory hit him. Sanji had played with his hair, Zoro had said something about Nami … Shit, this was why he hated getting drunk. The hangovers, the memory-blanks …

If Sanji had drunk that first glass in place of Zoro and obviously the cook hadn't wanted to tell him everything either, then they had been both been drinking a lot, which meant—

"Fuck!"

Zoro dashed from where he stood, trying to ignore the unsteadiness of his feet and rushed into the bathroom to see Sanji leaning over the toilet, emptying his stomach. The blond had sweat dripping down his forehead, his eyes shut tightly as his knuckles turned white, gripping the toilet bowl tightly. He was obviously sick to his stomach and couldn't handle his alcohol. It had been his game in the first place!

"Sanji?"

"I hate you," the cook muttered and Zoro felt cold.

 _Hate? He hates me?_

Zoro knew that Sanji had personal space issues, that was obvious. It was in everything he did, from the way he flinched when Zoro touched him to the way he froze up whenever there was the slightest brush of skin when they fought but Zoro thought Sanji had been getting better. At least, he hadn't freaked out too much when Zoro had kissed him … wait, was that what this was about? Zoro told himself to calm down, he was over-thinking things and that Sanji had a few days since the incident to tell Zoro he hated him, which meant the reason Sanji hated Zoro now was something else.

And that's when the stench reached him.

"You know, this is your fault," Zoro told him.

"Don't remind me," Sanji said, taking a few deep breaths as he stared down at the toilet bowl.

"How's your stomach?" Zoro asked. "Do your sides hurt?"

"What, are you a doctor now?" Sanji lurched forward, but nothing came out as one of his hands snaked around his stomach to hold it tightly. He let out a short laugh, clearly not amused. He kept his mouth slightly open, as though he were expecting himself to puke again.

Zoro wondered how long Sanji had been like this. Did he get alcohol poisoning by accident? The beer had been a bit old … Zoro shook his head. "I'll get you some Tylenol," Zoro told him. He went into the kitchen and scrambled through the cupboards. He knew somewhere in the back he kept some medicine for headaches, but he couldn't remember. He hadn't needed one in so long … _Got it!_

He came back to Sanji and handed them to him, along with a glass of water. "Before you take them, do you think you're going to puke again?"

"Why does that matter?" asked the blond, grabbing them out of Zoro's hands.

"It takes a few minutes for them to kick in, but if you hurl them out before they take affect, they're pointless," Zoro reminded him. "It's counter-productive."

"Just let me take them, bastard," Sanji muttered. He put the pills in his hand and tossed his head back, swallowing them. He drank the water afterwards. It was very … backwards, to Zoro who usually took the pills down with water. Then again, he should've never expected the cook to be normal.

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

Sanji didn't seem to care and instead stood up, shakily onto his feet.

Seeing the cook with a hangover was entirely different from seeing him any other day of the year.

The blond's usually well-kept hair was untidy and a mess. In fact, if he squinted, he could see the beginning of his other eye. His eyes, on that note, looked dead. They were tired with slight bags underneath them, the curly eyebrow looked menacing and his jaw was set, his mouth in a thin line. He was paler than usual and his breath reeked, gone was the gentleman-like cook who served him at the Baratie, instead replaced by a stranger with a rather amusing facial expression. Zoro wasn't going to lie, Sanji did not look attractive like this. But if he imagined Sanji's cheeks just a little redder, took away his horrible breath, positioned his head just a little back and turned Sanji's groans of complaint turn into soft moans, he was sure he knew what the cook looked like in the middle of the throes of passion.

Zoro blushed and looked away. "Anyway, what do you remember?"

Sanji blinked. "Um … well, green is your natural colour," Sanji said. "Course, you don't explain why at all or anything." He frowned. "What kind of screwed up genes do you have?"

"What kind of screwed up genes do _you_ have, Curly Brow?" Zoro shot back.

Sanji didn't dignify him with a response. Instead he strode out of the bathroom as though he had retained all of his dignity. "Hungry, Marimo?"

"You wish, cook."

Of course, at that moment Zoro's stomach decided to growl rather loudly.

"How's bacon and eggs?"

"Fine with me."

Zoro went into his room and took the extra pills himself. With a look in the large mirror, he thought about his appearance. He didn't look much better than Sanji. His eyes were bloodshot, his usually tanned complexion slightly whiter. He didn't look pasty or sickly, but Zoro could admit he had seen better days. What did he remember from the night before? The question about Kuina, a question about whether or not he was gay, he remembered that one vaguely, but he had already been pretty gone at that point and he couldn't remember what his reply had been.

 _"Why did you do it?"_

Okay, that question he remembered. He remembered Sanji had asked him twice. And each time, Zoro had no idea what to say. He really thought he should know himself better than this. He didn't go around kissing random people, in fact, he could probably count on one hand the number of people he had kissed in his life, and that included family members. So what _had_ he been thinking? The kiss was so vivid in his mind but the moments leading up to it were foggy. He wasn't sure what had happened. One minute Wado was on the ground, the next his lips were on Sanji's. He needed answers.

Zoro knew he'd regret it, but the only people he trusted to know him at least as well as himself, if not more, were those idiots he called friends.

* * *

The perfect reason to leave the apartment came a few hours later when Sanji walked into the kitchen and frowned. "Hey Zoro, I'm out of cigarettes. Could you buy me a pack?"

Zoro wanted to question Sanji about this, seeing as Sanji knew first hand how horrible Zoro's sense of direction was, but he nodded all the same. "King Ground, right?"

"Yeah," Sanji replied.

"Alright then, I guess I'm going out."

Sanji gave him a strange look. Maybe Zoro should've argued with him more about it, since he didn't usually go out to get the cook anything except for the occasional ingredients, but he really wanted to get out of the house. He needed an excuse to leave so he could talk to —Zoro shuddered— Luffy and the gang.

Zoro left the apartment and got into a taxi, deciding it was going to be easier than trying to find his way on his own. He found that what he wanted to discuss with his friends was too important for him to waste precious time getting lost for. He gave the taxi driver Luffy's address and in fifteen minutes, he was outside the straw hat's house.

Zoro gave the man his money before ringing the doorbell, rocking on the soles of his feet. Why did he feel so awkward? It was just Luffy. Maybe it was the topic of conversation that was driving him insane, making him look over his shoulder like he expected someone to turn up and assassinate him or something. Oh God, he was starting to think like Usopp.

The door opened and Luffy grinned at him. "Hey, Zoro! How've you been? What's up?"

Zoro gave Luffy a polite nod. "Um, can I come in?"

"Yeah, sure," Luffy told him. "Nami! Guess who's here?"

There was a chuckle and then Zoro could hear Nami's undeniable footsteps approaching. "Well I'm going to say it's a sexually confused, scatter-brained marimo, who fights with three swords." She turned the corner and grinned at Zoro. "And I was right. Imagine that."

Luffy gave Zoro a strange look. "Sexually confused? What, did you actually have sex with Sanji?"

"What? No!" Zoro shook his head profusely. "I just … I kind of need advice."

Nami's eyes widened and her grin split so large, Zoro was sure her face was going to crack. "Really?" She smirked. "In that case, don't listen to anything Luffy says and trust me. Usopp's also not to be bothered with, he couldn't possibly understand what's going on in your head."

"And you know?" Zoro asked skeptically.

"Of course I do," Nami said. "I went through the same thing! Well, in my case it wasn't towards someone of the same sex, but still, it's still the same, isn't it?"

"Isn't what?" Zoro shook his head. "You're getting ahead of yourself, you haven't even heard what I need to talk about!"

"I can guess," Nami said. "I'm very good at it."

"Can't I just talk first?" Zoro asked. "I'm the one who's going through a mid-life crisis while not actually being in the middle of my life—"

"You never know that Zoro," said Luffy cheerfully. "Maybe forty-six is as old as you get."

Zoro sent him a glare. "Not funny."

"Look, why don't you just come in and sit down first? Then you can tell us all about it." Nami seemed as though she could read Zoro's mind, which was racing a thousand miles per second, trying to figure out what Nami had said and put a response to it while it was still wondering at the same time where he stood with Sanji. She reminded him of those annoying girls in high school who always had to know the latest gossip.

Zoro took a seat and tried to calm down his breathing. He made a mental note to remember to actually get Sanji that pack of cigarettes.

"So, Zoro, what have you been up to?" Luffy asked. "I mean you come to the bar every now and then, but you still haven't fought Sanji yet and Nami says he's still probably going through training. You don't talk to us as much as you used to." Luffy looked slightly saddened at this. "I mean I know you get a bit preoccupied with your new boyfriend and all—"

"Sanji isn't my boyfriend!"

"—but that isn't a reason to ignore us all. I balance having Nami as a girlfriend just fine with my social life." Luffy frowned. "I dunno, is it like, Sanji's leaking pheromones that are making you guys go at it like rabbits?" He frowned. "I never understood why rabbits had to have such a big family in the first place—"

"Thank you Luffy, but I'm not getting laid," Zoro said and he had to admit that in all his years, he had never had a conversation this strange.

"Of course you aren't," said Nami, putting a cup of coffee on the table, "otherwise you'd be like, ten times happier and glowing. When was the last time you got any?"

"Can we not talk about my sex life?"

"You mean your lack of a sex life?"

"Nami!"

Nami laughed. "You're too innocent Zoro," she said. "You're blushing you know," she added. "But seriously, why don't you talk? What's been up? What happened?"

Zoro frowned. "I would get to that, if you'd stop asking me questions every second."

Nami gave him an apologetic smile that didn't feel all that apologetic. Something told him Nami liked watching him squirm. "Sorry Zoro, you can start talking."

Zoro knew that Nami wouldn't interrupt now, she was too anxious to learn more, but now that Zoro had the chance to talk, he couldn't find words. He bit the inside of his cheek in thought. What should he say? What words should he use? What could he say without Nami acting like some slash-loving-fangirl? Probably nothing. "I … I just …" Zoro sighed and leaned his head back, fisting his hair in his hands. "This is so confusing!" he managed to say. To their credit, Nami and Luffy stayed silent as he tried to collect his thoughts. "Something happened," he began a little unsteadily. "A few nights ago. You know how I'm training Sanji and all that, right? Well a few nights ago was the first night I fought him with three swords." He bit his lip, waiting for Luffy to interject or say something completely random. He didn't. "It was good. He's getting really good, you know. He's got his kicks and aim on target. Anyway, after a few minutes of sparring, he did this … thing, I don't even know how to describe it. Just one second I had Wado in my mouth and the next, she was on the floor a few feet away from me." Zoro shook his head. It was crazy to think that a swordsman of his caliber had been disarmed so easily … "And …" His voice grew unsteady. He leaned his elbows on his knees, clasping his hands together. "And then there were a few seconds where something happened, like my body moved on autopilot and then I was standing in front of him and …" He took a deep breath. "There was this small space between us and then … and then there just _wasn't_ anymore …" Zoro shook his head. "I don't … I don't even know what came over me, or if it was even me doing it, it was like I was in a trance or something and I couldn't break free. I was just … I just let myself move and—" Zoro couldn't find words to describe what had happened. He honestly didn't know what to say. "I don't even know what to do now," he said. "I'm just so … I'm so confused," he finished.

There was silence that cut through like a knife and then—

"Hey everybody, Usopp's here to party and— why's everyone so quiet?"

Everyone immediately snapped their heads to the front door's entrance to see Usopp standing there looking completely and utterly confused. His eyes landed on Nami and Luffy first and then Zoro before they widened. "Zoro's here? Since when?"

Both Nami and Luffy sent Usopp a glare.

"Is now a bad time?"

Zoro shook his head and stood up. "No," he said at the same time Nami said, "Yes!".

Usopp slowly backed away, heading outside once more. "Okay, I'm going to listen to the lady and—"

"No Usopp," Zoro said. "You don't have to go. I was just leaving—"

"But you just got here," Luffy reminded him.

"And you just started talking," Nami added. "Usopp can leave—"

"He doesn't have to," Zoro said. ""Anyway, Sanji needs some new cigarettes so—"

"Zoro, sit," Nami commanded. "Usopp, take a seat in the kitchen. If you really feel like you have to jump into our conversation with Zoro, do so, but don't say anything stupid." She turned her attention towards the swordsman. "You're not leaving here until we've sorted this out."

Zoro stared at her, unable to speak. Finally, he managed a, "Waa?"

"Sit," she repeated. "Usopp, in the kitchen."

"But—"

"Now."

Usopp scurried off into the kitchen and took his seat. Zoro watched him fiddle his thumbs absent-mindedly. This woman was scary. Zoro sat obediently.

"Good, now," Nami said, leaning closer to him. "So you kissed him. Then what?"

"Wait, Zoro kissed who?" Usopp asked, jumping out of his seat. "How come I never heard about this?"

Nami rolled her eyes. "Sanji, he kissed Sanji, okay? Now, you were saying?"

"Since when is Zoro gay?" asked Usopp, utterly confused.

"Since a few nights ago," Nami snapped. "Zoro, speak before he manages to open his stupid mouth again, alright?"

Zoro wasn't even sure what to say. It felt like he was at an intervention or something of the sort. He deeply regretted deciding to go to his friends, but he was already here and from the determined look in Nami's eyes, she wouldn't let him leave until he was perfectly at ease again. To be fair, Zoro knew that if Nami ever turned up on his doorstep and looked so shaken she was trembling and then she stuttered out an explanation being that she had kissed Robin or something, Zoro would've done the same thing. _Not that it's likely Nami's going to start kissing the archeologist or anything …_

"I just … I don't even know how to react," Zoro managed to say. "Am I thinking too much about this? Cause he sort of seems to have forgotten about it."

"Hold up," Usopp said once more. "Zoro kissed Sanji? As in Sanji the cook who's male? Who had Makino blushing for a week? _That_ Sanji?" Usopp shook his head and entered the living room, taking a seat on the couch. "Did you get drunk or something? I thought you were quitting."

"I _am_ quitting," Zoro told him. "And I wasn't drunk," he added.

"You look a bit like you do after a bad hangover though," Nami pointed out.

"Okay, yes, I did drink, but that was last night and Sanji started it!"

Nami rolled her eyes. "Honestly, you sound like you're in grade school or something."

"It was his idea," Zoro said. "Some stupid game with 'Twenty Questions' and that shit." He shook his head. "Either way, I'm not too eager to start drinking again,—"

"You always say that after a hangover and then you're back to the booze again," Nami told him.

"Yes, but this time I've been sober for nearly four months," Zoro pointed out. "Anyway, you're not helping my problem!"

Nami nodded. "Right, I know," she said. "Look, I swear, no more getting off topic. Just … we'll take this slowly, okay? First, how did he react?"

Zoro bit his lip. "He …" Fuck, what was he supposed to say? He barely even knew how he reacted! He just knew that he had kissed him and felt slightly disappointed by the fact that Sanji was able to cut up his fucking vegetables with ease. "He didn't really … do anything," he said slowly. "Just kind of like, stood there, frozen."

"That's not a rejection," Nami pointed out.

"But that wasn't exactly a go-ahead either," Usopp added.

Nami hit him with a couch pillow. "No one asked for your input!" She turned back to Zoro. "How about you? How did you feel after?"

"Confused," Zoro admitted. "I'm _still_ confused." He bit his lip, sure it was going to start bleeding if he chewed it anymore. "I don't know, it was short, brief and all. It wasn't like one of those things you see in movies, it wasn't a hot make-out session, but it definitely wasn't a peck on the lips either. It was just … I dunno, it was just a kiss. Plain and simple."

"But how did it make you feel?"

"What are you, a therapist?" Zoro shook his head. "I don't know, I'm telling you, I don't know!" He sighed. "I wish I did though. He asked a few times last night why I did it. And I've got no fucking clue what to tell him."

"Hey Nami," said Luffy, "can I talk to Zoro for a second? Alone?"

Nami looked at him strangely. "You?"

"Yeah," the straw hat said with a nod. "You know, like bro-talk."

"What about me, Luffy?" asked Usopp.

Luffy looked at him. "It's more of a … Zoro and Luffy bro-talk," he corrected himself. "Please Nami? Just give me like, ten minutes with him."

Usopp frowned. "He's in a vulnerable state of mind right now, Luffy. If you take advantage of him—"

"Take advantage of me?" Zoro cut him off. He snorted. "As if he could and even if he tried, he'd be flying out the window screaming in pain before he got the chance."

Nami looked at Zoro, then Luffy for a moment before nodding. "Okay. Ten minutes, no more, no less."

"Okay," Luffy told her with a big smile.

Nami and Usopp left the room, Nami dragging Usopp by the ear as he complained about how he should be included in the "bro-talk", Nami telling him to get over it and stop being such a baby.

Once they were alone, they sat in silence for a while.

Zoro turned to Luffy. "Look, you don't need to—"

"I love Nami," Luffy said cutting him off.

Zoro gave him a strange look. "How is that relevant?"

"You want to know why?" Luffy asked.

Zoro sighed. "I'm guessing you're going to tell me, whether I want to know or not, right?"

"Right," Luffy said with a laugh. "You're smart. Nami's smart too," he added. "And she has a really great smile. I like it when she laughs too. And she's really dedicated to what she likes. I like how she's got this obsession with tangerines and her tattoo's pretty cool too. I like the look in her eyes when she gets really excited and the way she seems to find a way to bet on everything—"

"You know, that's not necessarily a good thing," Zoro pointed out but Luffy was in a different world.

"—and the way she fights for what she wants. I like how she takes charge and doesn't let others boss her around and the way she reads those really big books to me to help me sleep sometimes. I like how she knows exactly what I'm thinking sometimes and how she lets me do what I want, well, most of the time. I like how she knows to keep the fridge stocked with meat and how I'm on her speed dial and I also really like this thing she does with her tongue,—"

"Okay Luffy, I think I understand," Zoro cut him off. "You love Nami, and you know why. So what's the point of telling me all of this? Do you want me to clap my hands and say 'bravo'? Just cause you're completely fine with your sexuality and understand everything that's going on inside your head, doesn't mean I do which is why I'm kinda in this whole crisis in the first place and—"

"What do you like about Sanji?"

Zoro stared at him. "I … what?"

"What do you like about Sanji?" Luffy repeated. He gave Zoro that look that so clearly said he just wanted a list of the qualities that Sanji possessed that he liked, plain and simple. It was the look of an idiot, but a serious idiot.

"I … I don't know," Zoro said. What was he supposed to say? Was there a right way to answer this? Was he ever going to stop over-thinking everything? He sighed. "I don't know," he repeated, sounding helpless to his own ears.

Luffy thought for a moment. "So there isn't anything about him you like?" he asked. "I mean, you took him in and put a roof over his head. It can't be because you hate him, right?"

"Well, I mean no," Zoro said. "I wouldn't do it if I hated him …"

"Exactly, which means you have to like something about him," Luffy told him. _Since when did he start sounding so logical?_ "So what do you like about him?"

"Well, I don't know. I … I like his cooking," Zoro said slowly.

"Okay, what else?" Luffy pressed gently.

"And … I like it when he fights. Watching him fight is … it's really amazing. I like the look he gets on his face when he finishes a cigarette, like he's just had a really good meal. I like the way he laughs, but not the kind of laughter when he's just trying to be polite," he added quickly. "It's when he laughs like he means it, his eyes just … they start shining. I like that he's really polite and the way he says everything with confidence. Watching him when he smirks, it makes me really happy. And the rare times when he gets shy, they're really adorable. Oh and the way he always fights back. He won't lie down, not for anyone. He's strong, both mentally and physically. I like that I don't have to hold back when we fight, that we can just fight and I can be myself when we do it …" He laughed softly to himself to see Luffy grinning at him widely. "What?"

"You're in love with Sanji."

"WHAT?!"

Zoro's voice did not just crack. It didn't because Zoro Roronoa's voice never cracked. Ever. Event through puberty, it never happened. Nope. Not once.

"Haha, your voice just cracked!" Luffy said with a laugh, that same dumb expression on his face that Zoro knew so well.

"It did not!"

"It did it again!"

Zoro gritted his teeth and tried to breathe calmly. In love with Sanji? What the fuck was Luffy talking about? That made no sense, none at all! "What the fuck do you mean 'you're in love with Sanji'?"

"Oh, I'm not," Luffy said. "You are, but not me."

"That's what I meant!" Zoro snapped.

"But you just said 'you're', as in me."

"No, I said 'you're' as in I was quoting you, which meant me!"

Luffy gave him a confused look. "What were we talking about?"

"How did you come up with that insane conclusion? Love? What the fuck do you know about love?"

"I'm in love with my girlfriend, remember?" Luffy told him. He shook his head. "Okay, fine, maybe I exaggerated,—"

"Damn right you exaggerated, I'm not in love with Sanji!"

"—it's not that you're in love with Sanji, it's that you're _falling_ in love with him," Luffy corrected himself. "That better?" he asked.

"That better?" Zoro repeated. "No, it's not fucking better! Who the fuck do you think you are, saying I'm falling in love with that curly brow cook?"

"I'm Luffy and you're Zoro. You're really bad at remembering things, aren't you?"

Zoro didn't understand how he hadn't strangled Luffy already. "I …" Zoro couldn't find words. He was too busy clenching his teeth and trying not to knock that full row of sparkling choppers out of his fucking mouth. "ARGH!"

"Nami, the ten minutes are up!" Luffy called with a gleam in his eye.

Nami came back into the room, dragging Usopp with her. She took one look at Zoro, then at Luffy and sighed. "Luffy, what did you do?"

"I just talked to him," Luffy said with a shrug. "I don't know why he threw a fit."

"What did you tell him then?" Nami corrected herself.

Luffy rubbed his head and seemed to be thinking, as though he didn't remember the giant bomb of lies he had dumped on Zoro a few seconds previous. "Um, that I loved you?" He paused. "Oh yeah! And that he loved Sanji."

"You do?"

Whether Nami's question was directed at Luffy's weird confession, or Luffy's claim that Zoro loved Sanji, Zoro didn't know. That was a lie. Zoro knew since he was sure Luffy had told Nami over at thousand times that he loved her. Especially since, knowing Luffy, he wouldn't be able to keep something like that secret.

"No, the liar's coming up with lies!" he declared. "Usopp, watch out, his lies are becoming more outrageous than yours!"

"What are you talking about?" Usopp asked. "I don't tell lies, I just tell slightly altered stories that people assume are lies," he said. "I really do have a friend from France who's claiming to be your long lost brother Zoro," he added.

"Yeah, fucking right," Zoro mumbled. Grabbing his jacket from the couch, he threw it on. "I'm leaving, I need to buy Sanji his cigarettes."

"You hate the smell of nicotine," Usopp reminded him. "Why are you buying him more?"

Zoro sighed. "I've gotten used to it."

Luffy gave him a knowing look, as did Nami.

"You can shut it," he told them. "I don't care if you didn't technically open your fucking mouths, I'm still fucking pissed at you! This means absolutely nothing, there's no deeper meaning in it, whatsoever!"

"Denial's a horrible thing Zoro," said Nami with a sigh. "I hear it leads to stress and you know large amounts of stress causes a shorter life-span," she added.

"Yeah well …" Zoro huffed. He had no idea what to say in response, so instead, he slammed the door shut and called a taxi to take him to the closest dug store.

* * *

"They're un-fucking-believable," Zoro muttered to himself as he entered the twenty-four hour store. He looked down the aisles, looking for the cigarettes labeled King Ground.

As he wandered, he thought about what Luffy had said.

 _"You're in love with Sanji."_

Was it true? Zoro shook his head. It couldn't be true. Sanji was … well Sanji was Sanji! He was a man and he was a cook and he was … he was beautiful when he fought. He owned the kitchen like it was his battlefield, he walked with grace. You had to earn the right to hear his real laugh, you had to try hard to get him to smile genuinely. But God was it worth it when he rewarded you for your efforts.

He was … he was a beautiful disaster.

Those were the only words Zoro could think of that could possibly describe Sanji. Short, simple and yet so complicated at the same time. Thinking about the blond had put a smile on the swordsman face that he didn't notice until man behind the counter gave him back his change and told him he must be a rather happy person to be smiling so widely.

Did that mean … did that mean Zoro really did love Sanji? Rarely did the swordsman find himself smiling for an unknown reason, though it was now quite clear that he had been thinking about Sanji but … what did Sanji make him feel? Fuck, thinking about it made his head hurt but he needed answers before he turned up at the apartment or else he'd never get any sleep.

Well Zoro already knew he liked Sanji's smile. It was lopsided and just a little shy, but Zoro found himself a very big fan of it. It was adorable really, when Sanji actually smiled. He liked it when Sanji laughed and he liked it when Sanji fought. To see the determination in his eyes was like watching fire burn. He liked how Sanji still looked just a bit sheepish whenever he won a bar fight, he liked when Sanji made his favourite meal and didn't even know it. He liked it when Sanji came to him in the night on the rare occasion that a nightmare came back, he liked the way Sanji would occasionally play with his hair. He liked the way Sanji was brimming with confidence while at the same time incredibly insecure. He liked when he could force Sanji out of his shell, he had liked the feel of Sanji's lips on his—

Okay, this wasn't working.

What about what he didn't like about Sanji?

Zoro thought and thought while the taxi made its way over to him and realized that he couldn't think of a damn thing. Sure, there were things about Sanji that irritated him, he didn't like that Sanji smoked and he found it kind of weird the way that Sanji always said "pardon" and never "excuse me", but he didn't _dislike_ those thing about him.

 _Holy fuck, I might just be falling in love with Sanji!_

How was he supposed to deal with this? Better yet, how did he come up with such a ridiculous conclusion that he liked Sanji in the first place? Of course he liked Sanji, he wouldn't let a complete nuisance stay at his apartment, but that didn't change anything. It still left him wondering. Was he over thinking this? Maybe he was just over-exaggerating, maybe Luffy's words were making him think weird things.

Zoro remembered the dumb look Luffy got on his face when he was listing all the things he liked about Nami. Did Zoro look like that when he was thinking about Sanji? And how was his expression supposed to say anything about his feelings towards the blond cook?

 _Oh wait, now there's actual feelings attached to this?_

He was supposed to talk to his friends, figure out what he thought about the kiss and move on with his life, not come up with the conclusion that he was falling head over boot for the cook! No, maybe he didn't love Sanji like Luffy claimed, but Luffy was right in a certain sense. Zoro felt something towards the cook, and it might be something a bit more than the strange friendship they had developed over the past few months. Maybe, just possibly, he liked Sanji. Just a little bit, in a slightly less than platonic way. Maybe.

But that wasn't the way life worked! You didn't just do that! It didn't make sense! Better yet, picking up random people who you met at a restaurant was also not the way life worked, but Zoro had done it anyway. Fuck, what was he supposed to do _now_?

The longer he thought about it though, as he sat in the back of the taxi, the more he realized something.

Sanji wasn't a harsh, cruel person. Even if Zoro was falling in love with him, or felt something towards him in general, Sanji wouldn't hold it over him, would he? Besides, when Zoro had kissed him, the blond hadn't pulled away. He hadn't really done anything, to be honest, but Zoro decided not to concentrate on that fact. He wasn't cold, right? But Zoro knew Sanji could be cold, he could be harsh. But that was all a facade, wasn't it? Zoro had gotten Sanji to open up to him, it couldn't be that hard to plant a possible seed of a relationship into Sanji's mind, could it? Sanji trusted him after all, didn't he?

The rest of the taxi ride was spent with Zoro wondering about Sanji and how he would react towards Zoro's confession. It wouldn't be full-blown, it would be more like the kind that school girls said. _"I kinda sort of like you. A little bit. Could we maybe ... possibly try something?"_ Oh God, was he starting to relate himself to a school girl? Fuck, what was Sanji _doing to him_?

When he turned up at the apartment, he entered to see Sanji standing in front of the giant window, his back to him. He seemed to be shaking as he leaned against the pane. He flinched when he heard Zoro close the door.

"I'm back," Zoro said. "Got the cigarettes."

Sanji didn't give any indication that he had heard him and Zoro realized something.

Sanji was a victim of abuse, amongst many other things. What the cooks had done to him was horrible, it was unimaginable the pain he went through. Surely, after an encounter with the cooks, there was no way Sanji could possibly like a man, never mind Zoro. He felt as though ice had been poured down on him at that moment. They were so far apart and yet so close. Sanji was so different from him, Zoro didn't even know why he thought it could work for even a moment, even if it had been something minor and small. He was being delusional, making up ridiculous dreams that wouldn't come true.

"Leave them there," Sanji said and Zoro complied, letting the packet fall on the couch, feeling like lead.

Going to his room, Zoro laid down in bed and put his arms behind his head, falling into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

 _Zoro pushed himself against him harder, feeling his lean body underneath his own. He gasped as he felt those skilled hands ran down his chest, leaving him breathless. His hands went out grasping for something, anything to hold onto, running themselves through his silky looking hair. He didn't dare open his eyes, scared everything would disappear._

 _Sanji pulled him closer, grasping at his hips, making their bare chests touch and the feeling of skin on skin had never felt so good. Zoro let Sanji push him up against the wall and moaned as Sanji left a trail of kisses down his neck before rising back up to his mouth, claiming it with his own. He teased, swiping his tongue across Zoro's lips but pulling back when Zoro tried to get him closer. Zoro grasped Sanji's hair and pulled him onto him, his growing arousal poking Sanji in the thigh. He opened his mouth underneath Sanji, felt the cook's tongue explore._

 _"Sanji," Zoro said breathlessly. "Fuck, Sanji, I love you."_

 _Sanji pulled away from him and looked at him straight in the eye. Those weren't Sanji's eyes, they were cold, they were icy. He let out a sly smile, as though he had been waiting for Zoro to say that._

 _Zoro froze. Had he said the wrong thing? Should he have kept it to himself?_

 _"Do you now?" asked Sanji in a slick voice that was nothing like his usual baritone._

 _Zoro gulped._

 _Sanji licked Zoro's Adam's apple, sucking on it and the swordsman gasped, fisting Sanji's hair. "Do you really love me, Marimo?" The tone of voice Zoro had come to believe was affection disappeared and was instead distant and glassy. He rose up to Zoro's ear and hissed, " **Tu m'énerve.** "_

 _And then the heat was gone, the warmth was gone and Zoro was alone._

* * *

When Zoro woke up, he fought back tears. He thought he could hear the faint sound of whimpering, but didn't dare think about it too much for fear it was his own voice. He put his fist in his mouth, trying to hold back any sobs.

Sanji was right.

Love _did_ hurt. A lot.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay, the thank-yous!_

 _Sekai Roronoa: Is my French really that bad? I'm going to admit to something here: I live in Quebec, in Canada, which means a) I'm Canadian, and b) I have to know French. I had to live in the province that's determined to become independent. If that happens, I swear I'm moving, but anyway, I like to think I'm good at French. I'm a high school student, which means in Quebec (cause Quebec's schooling is different from everywhere in the world), that's grade 7 to 11, putting my age from 12 to 18. I'm not telling you my age. Anyway, in that case, we have 3 French classes, français base, français enrichi and français avancé, which is for the people who are so good at French, it's like their mother-tongue. I'm in français enrichi, right in the middle, so I like to think I'm good at French. To be fair, I suck at verbs and I recognize this fact, as well as that I'm better at talking verbally in French, listening to a French conversation, and reading in French rather than writing it. You're the second person helping me in French, but I didn't tell you all that to get a sob story or anything, I'm just glad I can improve. Maybe when I return from break, I can be better in French class. I don't usually do anything in French during the break._

 _Guest : Okay, now to explain why I changed the title. First of all, I wrote the title before I came up with the story. I was just like, "No one talks about Sanji as a cook at the Baratie, most of the stories are about how Sanji's just a cook, not a cook who works at the Baratie" and I think the Baratie is a big part of Sanji's life, it shaped who he is today, but anyway, there's that and I just thought Zoro walking into the Baratie (pirate hunter Zoro in my mind, not this somewhat civilized AU version of him) was amusing, if he actually sat down and ordered, he'd look weird, sticking out like a sore thumb. But anyway, I came up with the title and then rewatched the Baratie arc and watched until the cooks pretended to be mean to Sanji and was like, "What if that was real?" And then this story came and then I actually bothered to finish the episode after a while and was like, "I feel awful for doing that to the cooks. Sanji was crying when he was leaving!" For me, Sanji had the most heart-felt departure. That's my opinion, of course. But anyway, then came the fact that the title was too long in my opinion but I couldn't find a nice, short, title. Then while writing this chapter, I came up with one and changed it accordingly. It just so happened you made a joke about it before I changed it. But seriously, I was thinking my summary could've been like: Title: **A Swordsman Walks Into the Baratie** , Summary: and shit goes down. But that was too vague. Anyway, I like awkward, I'm like, the queen of awkward, so I don't mind awkward comments at all._

 _JustCallMeLucie: Nah, it's no big deal. I was just kidding anyway. I thought that the best way to make them kiss was in a moment when they were both just really, really hyped up and totally couldn't understand what was happening and this story was also partially inspired by **Memories** by StarkBlack, well, it has certain elements, like the bar that they fight at gets them money (even if they haven't fought at it yet) and fighting is a turn on for both Zoro and Sanji, and the aspect that in the prequel/random oneshots that related to **Memories** before it happened, Sanji and Zoro first kissed while at a dojo while fighting each other and then Sanji just punched him and ended up kissing him. I'm very inspired by StarkBlack, I like what they write._

 _So just about everyone likes Zoro drunk, now this time, since it was Zoro's dream, **Sanji was speaking French. What did he say?**_

 _And next question: **Say you needed love advice, who would you go to? Zoro, Sanji, Nami, Luffy, or Usopp?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	16. Hello Old Friend

_**Author's Note:** So I looked on the actual main site, cause usually I read off the mobile site cause it's just easier for me, but apparently, everything I bold isn't there. Also, until I got 88 reviews, I couldn't see any of them for some reason. It was really weird, but anyway, I don't own **One Piece** or **Cinderella** , though I realize that Cinderella is a fairy tale and is from like, long, long ago, which means the copyright kinda isn't there anymore. So in case you forgot, this chapter is part of chapter 15, in the sense that while Zoro's running over to Nami to learn about his screwed up emotions, Sanji is doing this stuff. That's why I'm warning you, the dialogue at the very least from the beginning and a bit of the end are the same. Now I know this chapter is really angsty in comparison to others and when I got to the cutting part, I felt very poetic. But anyway, another thing: Patty calls Sanji a "fag". I hate this word, quite personally, because I wrote it once as an insult and my friend sent me a long explanation of what it meant and I was like, "Oh my God, I feel so bad!" and changed the insult and when I read the word, I actually feel sick, but I had to put it in here for the sake of the cook's douchebaggery. But seriously, I mean no offence by any of these insults. The thanks will be at the end._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Suicidal thoughts**

 **Self-inflicted harm**

 **Verbal abuse**

 **Mentions of physical abuse, rape, self-harm**

* * *

Chapter 16: Hello Old Friend

* * *

Sanji was going to puke.

The world was spinning and he was sure his stomach couldn't handle the contents from the night before. He could vaguely remember what happened, the general point of getting Zoro drunk was to get him loose enough to talk to Sanji and give him a reason for the kiss. Even if Zoro had given Sanji an answer, Sanji couldn't remember it. He hadn't expected Zoro to ask so man questions he was uncomfortable with to the point where he drank as much as Zoro himself.

Rushing off the floor, Sanji raced to the bathroom and leaned over the toilet bowl. He felt as though his dinner was fighting its way back up his throat, trying to force itself out. He opened his mouth slightly, waiting for his stomach to empty its contents, but nothing happened but a harsh pull from his bowels. God this hurt, when was the last time Sanji puked?

Oh God, it did not feel good.

As the food and other bits of something that Sanji preferred not to name came out, he held his stomach and tried not to cringe. The smell was worse, mixed in with his morning breath, he was surprised he hadn't passed out from the stench of his own vomit.

"Sanji?"

Great and now the swordsman was here! _Fan-fucking-tastic! This is your fault you know, if you hadn't asked so many personal questions, I wouldn't have had to drink!_

"I hate you."

There was silence for a while before Zoro spoke. "You know, this is your fault."

"Don't remind me," Sanji snapped. He took a few deep breaths, not able to pull his eyes away from the disgusting contents of the toilet bowl. Fuck, he hated alcohol.

"How's your stomach? Do your sides hurt?"

"What, are you a doctor now?" Sanji lurched forward, his stomach convulsing, but nothing was coming out. He kind of wished something would come out, so he could just empty his stomach and be done with it, but of course, that couldn't happen. He wrapped an arm around his stomach, holding it. For some reason, being stuck with a horrible hangover while Zoro played doctor seemed hilarious to him. He let out a laugh, though it sounded incredibly fake, even to his own ears. He leaned back over the bowl. Sanji didn't think the puking was over just yet.

"I'll get you some Tylenol," he heard Zoro say vaguely while he focused on trying to empty his stomach.

Sanji heard the scrambling of feet and was left to his thoughts.

He remembered once he had tried to make himself puke. Only once and it had been awful. Sticking his finger down his throat and praying the meal would come back up. It was during that time when he was thirteen and one of the cooks had started to call him fat. The acidic feeling in his mouth hadn't been pleasant and when it was over, he felt horrible about wasting precious food Zeff had made. He never did it again.

Zoro was back sooner than Sanji expected and handed him a glass of water and a pill. "Before you take them, do you think you're going to puke again?"

"Why does that matter?" asked Sanji, grabbing them out of Zoro's hands. If it would stop the pounding headache that made him feel like someone was persistently smacking a hammer at his head any better, he didn't care.

"It takes a few minutes for them to kick in, but if you hurl them out before they take affect, they're pointless. It's counter-productive."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Just let me take them, bastard." He tossed his head back and swallowed, before drinking the water to get rid of the scratchy feeling in his throat. Zoro was looking at him strangely, as though what Sanji was doing was wrong and Sanji just ignored him. The nausea was making his head spin.

"Don't say I didn't warn you," Zoro said, as though he knew everything, ha! Sanji found himself satisfied that Zoro had turned his head away and … was that a blush starting on his cheeks? What could possibly have the swordsman blushing?

Sanji stood up, his legs feeling like jelly. It was hard to stand, but he somehow managed and got himself upright.

"Anyway, what do you remember?" Zoro asked.

Give me a fucking minute, I'm trying to find my centre of gravity! Sanji blinked a few times once he was sure he was balanced. "Um …"

 _"Hmm…. oi! Marimo, is all your hair really green?"_

 _Zoro shook his head. "'ve already told ya, it's green!"_

 _"All of it?"_

 _"All of it!"_

 _Sanji smirked and raised an eyebrow. "Prove it!"_

 _Zoro seemed to think for a moment. Then he stood up and began to pull off his shirt._

"…well, green is your natural colour." Sanji knew there was something else that had happened after Zoro had dropped his shirt, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. _Why couldn't he remember?_ "Course, you don't explain why at all or anything," he added with a frown. "What kind of screwed up genes do you have?"

"What kind of screwed up genes do _you_ have, Curly Brow?" Zoro shot back.

Sanji couldn't think of a response. What was it with Zoro's obsession with his eyebrows? Then again, what was it with Sanji's obsession with Zoro's hair? Instead of trying to come up with some impossible answer, Sanji strode out of the bathroom, calling behind him, "Hungry, Marimo?"

"You wish, cook."

Sanji could hear Zoro's stomach growl from the kitchen.

"How's bacon and eggs?"

"Fine with me."

* * *

Breakfast was silent, but while Sanji sat across the table from Zoro, he came to wonder something. In three days, it would officially be two months since he had been staying at Zoro's. _You'd think by now the cooks would file a missing person's report. Then again, they're bastards so I shouldn't expect anything less._

As the hours wore on, Sanji became more and more curious about it. What _was_ going on at the Baratie nowadays? Searching through his blazer, he pulled out his packet, in need of a smoke. When he realized he was drawing up thin air, an idea came to mind.

"Hey Zoro, I'm out of cigarettes," Sanji called to the swordsman. Knowing his horrible sense of direction, Sanji could easily slip out of the apartment for a while during the time that Zoro was out searching for the drug store. "Could you buy me a pack?"

"King Ground, right?"

"Yeah," Sanji replied, surprised that Zoro remembered.

"Alright, then I guess I'm going out."

Though it had been his intention to get the green-haired man out of the apartment, it still felt strange that he was agreeing so quickly.

Watching the man leave, he cleaned up the kitchen and then made his way to the Baratie.

* * *

Though it had been a while since he had stepped inside, it still felt the same. The atmosphere still looked amazing, the customers were all happy and smiling. There wasn't a single thing going wrong. But Sanji also remembered the way it was in the kitchen and it sent cold shivers down his spine.

He looked around for familiar faces and found Moodie. She was sitting with Fullbody, as usual, her face grimmer than usual. She almost always managed to plaster on a believable fake smile, which was why Sanji had to give her his respect, seeing as every now and then, even he knew his smiles weren't convincing enough, but what had happened?

Walking over to her, he smiled and bent down on one knee next to her chair. "A rose by any other name would smell as sweet."

Moodie smiled and looked down at him. "Sanji!" She looked over at Fullbody and gave him a fake smile. "Would you mind if I spoke to my friend?"

Fullbody's mouth drew into a thin line, but he nodded. Curtly, but he nodded all the same.

Moodie and Sanji went to a corner of the room where there was little activity. Sanji felt remarkably bad. During his time with Zoro, he had thought of the Baratie, but he had thought of it as a hinderance, as something he wanted to shake off from him and yet he was handcuffed to it entirely, like it was a dead weight. But he had completely forgotten about the customers, the ones who enjoyed meals here and the ones who came to speak to others and hold business meetings. It wasn't the Baratie that was evil, it was the cooks in the kitchen who were. Moodie suffered by being associated with Fullbody, he was someone that she was definitely not fond of, yet Sanji couldn't understand why they were together. If it made her unhappy, why were they still together?

"It's been a long time, Sanji," Moodie said. Her eyes held a little more sadness than usual. "Where have you been?"

"That's not important," Sanji assured her. "I've been well. I wish I could say the same to you."

"It's nothing, really," Moodie told him with a small smile. A fake one.

"Don't give me that," Sanji said. "A lady with your grace should never be in such a forced relationship. Why are you doing this to yourself?"

Moodie looked away from him. "You're young Sanji, aren't you?"

"You're not very old yourself," Sanji reminded her.

"According to my father, I'm too old to be unmarried."

Sanji's eyes widened. Unmarried? Did that mean …?

"Moodie, look me in the eyes," he told her in a gentle voice.

Slowly, the blonde turned her gaze towards Sanji, but she was no doubt unhappy to do so.

Sanji took her chin in his hand and gently brought her gaze up to his. "Are you happy with Fullbody?"

Moodie tried to pull away from Sanji, but he wouldn't let her go. "Sanji …"

"Are you happy with Fullbody?" he repeated.

Moodie let out a sigh. "…No," she admitted in a quiet voice.

"Okay then." Sanji let go of her. "Then I'm going to tell you this. You are a strong and independent woman. You were gifted with an unimaginable amount of beauty, and you're smart as well. You are not going to settle for a bastard like Fullbody, I won't allow it. Arranged marriages and the such can go to hell for all I care, but you are not settling. A woman like yourself should never have to settle."

Moodie stared at him, her mouth slightly agape. There were tears beginning to well in her eyes. "Sanji …"

"You are going to speak to your father, you hear me?" Sanji asked. "You're going to speak to him and you're going to discuss the situation and what's happening because I swear on my parents graves, you are not marrying him. Not while I'm alive."

Moodie gave him a bittersweet smile. "I wish it were that easy, Sanji," she told him.

"It _is_ that easy," Sanji insisted. "Moodie, if you want something, if you don't like the way things are, then you change them. You change them until things are the way you want them to be because no one, especially not you, has to settle for something as disgusting as that man over there."

"Oh Sanji …" Moodie stared into his eyes, leaning slightly closer to him. "If you were only a few years older, or perhaps I were a few years younger …"

Sanji's eyes nearly widened when he realized what she was implying. "Moodie …"

Moodie turned her head away. "I wish I had the same idealism as you Sanji," she said. "But for adults, the world is very different than you think. You've only started to enter this world, you can't possibly understand—"

"Bullshit!" Sanji couldn't help feeling awful for his sudden outburst, or his horrible use of language in front of such a lady, but he bit his lip and swallowed his pride to stop himself from instantly falling to his knees, begging for forgiveness. Instead, he hastily continued. "Pardon me for my language, but it doesn't have to be idealism, it can be reality. You just need to have the will to make it that way."

Moodie shook her head. "I don't know …"

Sanji nodded slowly. "I can't force you to do anything, but I know you'll do whatever you think is right when it comes down to it." He checked his watch. "I have to get going, but I'll visit some time later, okay?"

Moodie nodded, looking at him with heartbroken eyes and yet at the same time with acceptance.

As Sanji watched Moodie return to Fullbody, he couldn't help wondering what he had just done.

Since when did he intervene in others lives like that? Of course, he always gave Moodie encouragement over her bad relationship with the lieutenant, but at the same time, he kept his distance, knowing it wasn't his business to get mixed into her affairs. And yet … was this a side affect of living with Zoro? Did that mean he'd become more nosy? Feel the need to make everything his business?

But Sanji knew he was looking at it in a negative way when really, it was a good thing. At least, in his case.

If Sanji were to remember himself before meeting Zoro, he'd like to think he'd changed over the time he'd be taken under Zoro's wing. He knew now he wouldn't stand for the abuse, he would figure out a way until his idealism as Moodie called it became reality. He would work hard, he'd give those cooks his mind back two-fold, no, three-fold, no, that wasn't even enough. He'd drive them into the ground till they were begging for mercy! That's what he'd do.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, Sanji prepared to leave the restaurant when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

It wasn't the callused hand he was used to touching him, it was rougher, larger. He counted in his mind. Over the times at the bar, Zoro's friends had learnt that Sanji wasn't the biggest fan of physical contact. It made him uncomfortable and horrible memories were brought back into light. Normally, they'd let go after about two seconds, once they realized his discomfort. Usopp had sympathized with him about it, talking about how he had an older brother who had the same condition who went to an all-boys boarding school and had been traumatized early on in his life, but his roommate kept hitting on him anyway. Sanji was sure Usopp was lying.

 _Two point ninety-seven, point ninety-eight, ninety-nine, three …_

They still didn't let go. In fact, their hand tightened its grip on his shoulder and Sanji remembered he was at the Baratie, not Partys. No one here knew about his problem. But even if they did, that hand felt too familiar. A shiver ran through him and he wondered if he had really forgotten about it, had a nearly two months with Zoro really made him forget so easily?

"Sir, if you could please—"

"So it is you, eh, Sanji?"

Sanji felt his blood run cold. He had thought, of course, but to hear his voice was a confirmation.

"Patty, please, let me go."

He could feel Patty's breath on his neck, his horrible stench only reaching Sanji now. "Oh yeah?" asked the bastard, his lips brushing against Sanji's ear. "The slut's going to beg for it?"

Sanji tried to get out of his grasp, but Patty's hand moved from his shoulder to his arm, gripping it tightly. If Sanji injured his arm, he'd have trouble cooking. Patty knew that.

"Where's Roronoa?" asked Patty. "Is he somewhere close by? Watching out for his little whore?"

"Fuck you," Sanji said through clenched teeth. If he threw a fit here in the middle of the restaurant, there would be problems. He couldn't ruin the reputation the Baratie had earned.

"Gotten feisty, have you, Sanji?"

 _Close your eyes. Think of something else. Think of happier times_. And this time, Sanji could. The kitchen, cooking late at night with Zoro while the swordsman barely kept his eyes open, watching while Sanji taught him about the way of making sushi. The way Zoro would sit at that one table that had the best view of the ring to watch Sanji fight. Sanji knew it was the best cause he sat there whenever he saw Luffy fight and he and Zoro would analyze the fight and no matter where it went, they could follow it. He thought of the time when Zoro decided that going grocery shopping with Sanji was better than alone since it was easier to find all those fancy named products and spices that Sanji was always short of because Zoro still thought he was in the dairy section when he was really in the canned food aisle.

"Are you ignoring me?" demanded Patty. "Fucking bitch, open your eyes! Get that smile off your face!"

 _SMACK!_

Sanji jolted forward at the unexpected hit that came to his ass. Wasn't that the way it had started? The first time they had … Sanji kept his eyes close and instead used the advantage of being forced forward to his advantage. He kicked his feet as he went, shocking Patty enough to let him go. He then scrambled away from him in the most dignified way he could. Fuck, he had no dignity anymore, he didn't know why he was trying.

"What the fuck?" demanded Patty. In a few strides, he was in front of Sanji and pulling him by the front of his suit. "Where's your Sugar Daddy? Eh? Where's the great Zoro Roronoa now that his slut's in trouble?" Patty let out a laugh. He wasn't loud when he spoke, but Sanji wished he was. He wished someone would notice. The others kept on eating while Patty put Sanji back on the ground. "Don't think you're better than us, because you're not, shit cook," he said.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Sanji mumbled.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing."

"Wonderful. Now get back into the damn kitchen, fucking whore," Patty ordered him.

Sanji was tempted to go. To enter the large kitchen and pick up his knife once more, slash at a few vegetables before he slashed a bit at some veins but then he remembered Zoro.

 _"I'm quitting."_

He had said it over at thousand times. Zoro was trying to quit drinking and while Sanji knew he couldn't live without a cigarette— not having one at the moment was driving him insane— he knew that the cutting … the cutting was something he should be able to live without. He already had a few burn marks on his body from mistakes in the kitchen, cuts on his thumb and a few on his arms for peeling mistakes, there was no reason to add more. Zoro had battle scars, Sanji had mistakes etched into his skin, a lesson coming with each one. He wasn't going to add more. He had to believe he was stronger than that.

"No."

Patty stared at Sanji.

"What'd you say?"

"I said no," Sanji repeated. He turned on his heel to leave when he was grabbed by his collar and forced back. He felt like choking and nearly coughed but he bit his lip fiercely, holding in all sounds. His lip was probably bleeding now.

"You think you're in a position to deny me?" Patty shook his head. Up close in Sanji's face in a quiet, dangerous sounding whisper, Patty spoke. "What would Zeff think, eh, shit cook?"

Sanji couldn't help but feel shaken at the mention of Zeff.

Zeff was … Zeff was the father Sanji didn't have. Zeff was the person who forced Sanji onto his knees, holding him down until Sanji finally learnt to play dirty and cheat his way out. Zeff was the person who gave Sanji a home, the one who helped him escape and though he was put in a new kind of prison, it was better than that damn cell, anything was better than it.

Maybe Zeff would be disappointed.

 _"I didn't bring you up to be a coward, Sanji!"_ He could hear the head chef lecturing him. _"I didn't teach you to run with your tail between your legs! What kind of a man are you if you can't fight? Where did I go wrong with you?"_

Sanji shook his head. No, that wasn't right. At this point in time, after what Sanji had endured, he knew what Zeff would say.

 _"It's about time you got out. It's about time you stopped being a coward and realized that there is a way out, there is a path. Are you just going to let it be hidden in the trees again? You're a coward if you don't go for it."_

"Zeff," Sanji said slowly, "would be proud."

"Excuse me?"

"Zeff would be proud," Sanji repeated. "That I've finally gotten a mind of my own!" He gave a harsh kick and Patty was forced away from him, onto the ground. "I'm a human being," Sanji said. "I've got feelings, I have dreams and none of them involve being here. None of them, you hear me? I have my pride and I have my dignity and I'm not going to let you bastard cooks crush it. I have places to go, I have a place I can go that isn't here. I have a place that I … that I can call home, which is more than you'll ever know!"

Patty sat up from the floor and raised a single leg to himself. He smirked. "You think you do."

Sanji knew he should've left right then. He had said what he wanted to, he had taken Patty down a peg, he should be able to leave. But he didn't leave. He didn't leave and instead, he took the bait. "What do you mean?"

Patty laughed. "You think that moss headed idiot cares about you? Maybe he's given you a place to stay and maybe he's taken care of you, but for how long? How long can someone like him stand someone like you? You're dirty, remember? Absolutely filthy." He snorted. "Who would want a pest like you around?"

"Z-Zoro's isn't like that," Sanji said, his fists clenching. He was starting to feel it again. The insecurity that grabbed at his stomach, made it churn and his head hurt. "He isn't like that!"

"Oh, Zoro is it?" Patty teased. "You're pretty close to your Sugar Daddy, tell me, is he your pimp?"

Sanji wanted to hit him, right in the head, he saw red. No one should treat Zoro like that! Of course the swordsman had his faults, but such accusations were totally unfounded! Zoro was his friend, no one stood by and watched as their friend was dissed. It didn't matter that Zoro wasn't actually there, it didn't matter that maybe Sanji wasn't thinking straight. All that mattered was that the bastard was saying lies about Zoro.

"Shut up!" Sanji screamed and if Patty's fall to the floor hadn't brought everyone's attention towards them, then Sanji's shout sure did it. Moodie was looking at him from her seat with a shocked expression, in amazement.

"Don't tell me you're in love with the man, are you?" Patty let out another sinister laugh that rang through Sanji's ears. "Look at that, Sanji's a little faggot, isn't he?"

"I'm not!" Sanji said, stepping back. "I … Fuck you," he screamed at Patty. "What the fuck do you know?"

"I know that your Roronoa's little pet," said Patty. "Of course he'll pamper you, but do you really think he's there for you? He abducted you, remember? Of course, we were glad you were gone, but do you really trust a kidnapper? Stockholm syndrome?" He laughed. "Tell me Sanji, how long do you think it'll take before he gets tired of you?"

"T-tired of me?" Sanji repeated.

"Your his little charity case," Patty said. "Isn't it obvious? Once he's done his hours and given back to the community, you'll be gone. If Roronoa's your friend, where is he now? Why isn't he here, helping a friend in need?"

"Shut up!" Sanji screamed. "Zoro isn't … it isn't like that! He's not like that!"

"You sound like you're trying to convince yourself, faggot," Patty snarled. "You know that, don't you?" he barked. "Admit it. No one wants you. No one needs you, so why don't get your slutty little ass back in the kitchen and put on a apron and be a good whore?"

Sanji was close to tears. He knew, somewhere in his mind that what Patty was saying was utter bullshit. It couldn't be true because he knew Zoro, he knew him! But then another voice asked him if that was really true. After all, Zoro had kidnapped him, was Zoro really who he thought he was?

He hated Patty, he hated Patty for putting those ideas into his head, he hated himself for thinking that maybe, maybe it was true. He hated everything because life was just too confusing and he didn't feel like he could trust anyone.

He wanted to crawl up and die. He wanted to so badly, so, so badly. But he didn't. Instead, he turned around and ran.

* * *

Entering Zoro's apartment, Sanji raced to the kitchen drawers. Pulling out a small carving knife, he cut. Sharp, painful and bliss and he cried.

He cried for the blood, for the pain, for the feeling of being alone, for being hopeless. He cried because he needed to do this. He cried because the self-inflicted pain was his only release, he cried because he wasn't stronger. He cried because Zeff probably thought he was stronger. He cried because he was weak, because he was scarred. Because he was charity.

He cut again, for the pain and the unshed tears he had held back. He cut for the nightmares to go away, for the horrible past to disappear. He cut for the loss, for the hunger he had felt, for the care he thought Zoro had given him. He cut for his selfishness, for thinking he was the only one in pain. He cut for Moodie and her horrible situation with Fullbody, he cut for his weakness.

And he cried even more.

He cried for Moodie and how he told her to have hope even though he himself was an empty shell. He cried for Zoro and his friends and all of the people who surrounded him. He cried for Zoro's lost friend, he cried for all the memories that now brought him pain. He cried for his parents, whom he had never mourned for, he cried for Zeff and what had happened, for how Zeff thought he was giving him a new family, a better one. He cried for the family he thought he had in Zoro and his friends. He cried for the betrayal and the deceit, the overwhelming feelings he couldn't keep in, for everything and anything.

And when he was finally done, he knew he couldn't face Zoro.

Because as much as it hurt, as much as it drove him absolutely insane, he couldn't stop thinking of Zoro and his smile, the way Zoro fought with everything he had, the way Zoro was bold and loud and a little obnoxious but still calming at the same time. The way Zoro made him feel … God, he sounded so screwed up. But he had done the very thing he had been trying to convince himself he wouldn't do, tried to convince himself he was strong enough without it. But of course, he fell back into the habit and this was the result. He couldn't face Zoro, knowing what he had done and his reaction to what he learnt about the charity. That Sanji even thought it was more …

He stared at the hardwood floors. God, there was blood. There was so much blood, it seemed as though it was all Sanji could see. He looked at the clock and decided that he'd have to risk Zoro coming in and seeing him cleaning.

Wiping the floors made him think of the story of _Cinderella_ , a story he hadn't thought of in forever. It was a story read to the girls in that place, that wretched, nightmarish hell. What was it about again?

There was a girl who cleaned the house of her step-mother and her two step-sisters because her father had died and so had her original mother. They called her Cinderella because of the cinders she cleaned in the fireplace. There was a prince too, and someone who delivered a message. The messenger gave Cinderella a letter that spoke of a ball the prince was holding to find his "true love". Cinderella got a dress all prepared and there were singing mice, maybe? He wasn't absolutely sure. And then the sisters had ruined the dress and Cinderella had cried until her fairy godmother turned up. The godmother gave her a dress and glass slippers and a carriage made out of a pumpkin and horses. She danced with the prince till midnight, when the spell wore off and she ran back, leaving her shoe behind. Now that was where the story got a bit fuzzy. Because Sanji had read the book, but the story the others said was different. The story they said involved the prince looking for the owner of the shoe, but it would only ever fit Cinderella, so she was called down from the attic because she was allowed to try on a shoe, even if the step-sisters were against it and it fit and they got married. Now it was almost the same as the story Sanji had read in the night under the covers after sneaking in and wondering why they never read the boys any stories and he found that the story actually spoke about bleeding feet and people cutting off limbs to fit into that glass slipper. It was probably all bloody by the time it got to Cinderella and the beauty of it was probably gone, but it was still the perfect fit.

Bloody, disgusting but still perfect for the other.

Sanji tried not to relate the story to himself and Zoro. God he was so messed up, he didn't even know what he was thinking, but he was dirty and soiled and absolutely rotten and yet when he was with Zoro … it felt as though those things didn't matter. He was like a distraction from the real world, something else he could grip onto when reality seemed too much. _The perfect fit. Bruised, bloodied and ugly, but a perfect fit nonetheless_. Of course, he'd never admit to Zoro that in this screwed up analogy he played a blonde princess.

When the floor was clean, Sanji stood back up and checked himself in the mirror.

He felt woozy and didn't enjoy looking at his reflection, but after pressing on the wounds, the bleeding stopped. His image seemed to waver in the mirror. He stared at it, stared at his pale face, his pale body. He looked sickly right now. His hair reminded him of hay, his eyes looked dead. He had to look away, couldn't stand to see himself like this and instead put on his blazer, covering up his arms once more.

God, he couldn't look at Zoro. There was no way he could make himself do it.

* * *

He was staring out the large window when he heard the door open. He leaned against it, trying not to cry. He had already cried, he was as dried up as the Sahara desert. He couldn't possibly shed another tear, and yet he still felt them slip out, his body shaking at the bitter taste of the tears as they rolled past his lips. Licking his lips, he wished he could stop them but he knew better.

"I'm back."

 _Where have you been? It's so late! I was … I was worried._

But Sanji didn't dare say these words. After all, if he was a charity case, why should he worry about Zoro? He didn't mention the time and instead focused on not shaking too much.

"Got the cigarettes," he said and Sanji shut his eyes, the tears still falling.

Thank God he wasn't facing him, he could feel each word Zoro spoke hitting him like a knife. The words sounded so caring, so … affectionate, almost. But Sanji couldn't forget. It's easy to pretend. It wasn't hard to fake a worried expression. It wasn't hard to pretend that you cared. It wasn't hard to fake a sympathetic glance. It wasn't fucking hard to pretend like someone actually mattered.

There was silence and Sanji knew Zoro was expecting an answer.

He opened his mouth so many times, hoping when he spoke he wouldn't give any indication he was crying. Crying over something this dumb, God he was pathetic. He took a deep breath, making sure his voice didn't shake. "Leave them there," he said finally, but he was certain he was quivering. If Zoro noticed, he gave no indication.

Sanji didn't turn around until he heard Zoro's bedroom door close. He took the cigarettes from the couch. King Ground. Why would Zoro remember such a pointless thing about him?

Sanji lit the cigarette, wishing his problems, just like the smoke, would all fly away and vaporize into nothing.

* * *

 _There were swords flying, hitting flesh, blood beginning to spatter. Patty and Carne were on their knees, unable to stand anymore._

 _"We give!" screamed Carne. "We give! You've won!"_

 _There was another jab, the sword striking fiercely at Patty's hand, hitting his ring knuckle before pulling back. Crimson stained the floor one more. "And you?" demanded the voice. He knew that voice._

 _"He's yours," said Patty. "Just … just don't hurt us anymore!"_

 _There was a satisfied grunt and then the swords were sheathed._

 _Three. There were three swords._

 _"Zoro?" Sanji said, taking a step closer._

 _Zoro turned to him. He looked different. He wore a bandana on his head, his eyes were a fierce colour. He took the bandana off and tied it around his tricep. He ignored Sanji's call and instead turned around._

 _"Hey, Zoro! Wait!"_

 _The swordsman turned to him, his eyes cold. "Why should I?"_

 _"Because," Sanji said, unsure of how to answer, "I'm your friend? Aren't I? We're friends, right? We're nakama."_

 _"I'd never be nakama with someone like you," Zoro spat. "I pity you, really, shit cook."_

 _Sanji tried not to flinch at his choice of words. "W-what?"_

 _"I've paid my dues," Zoro told him. "Get out of my sight now, Charity Case." And with that, he walked away, never looking back once._

* * *

Sanji woke up trembling. He knew Zoro wasn't like that. He liked to think that he wasn't, but he knew that people could do complete one-eighties on him. He brought his knees up to his chest and tried to stop the whimpering. He couldn't sleep, not without waking up from another nightmare. One a few occasions, he thought he heard something from Zoro's room, but he didn't move from his bed.

It was the first night Sanji didn't come to Zoro to save him from a nightmare.

Instead, the blond let the darkness swallow him, suffocate him. Suffering at the hands of the bastard cooks and the cold, merciless Zoro in his mind was better than thinking the real one cared.

It was dangerous to trust.

To trust that someone cared, to believe in them with everything you have. It was dangerous but he wanted it still, he wanted to believe it because when he was around Zoro, he felt it. He felt what he imagined it would feel like when someone cared.

Sanji was so close to not caring about whether or not it hurt. He just wanted to feel wanted. No, he just wanted to be wanted by _Zoro_.

And that would never happen.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Now for the thank-yous!_

 _AirieDLokie: I find that when I hear someone talk, I know instantly if they're from Quebec or from France if they speak in French because there's just the accent that carries. I met someone who was learning French and she asked me how to say "my favourite colour is blue" and I told her and then she was like, "Isn't it favori?" and the word I chose was "préféré". And we don't call socks the same thing and a bunch of other things. I don't know, I just think Quebec should have its own dictionary for words since it thinks it's so special at their languages._

 _nero922: Yeah, I did cause I was just like, the title's too long, what else do I call it? And this new title is in reference to Sanji because I always like the term "beautiful disaster" cause I think of it as an oxymoron and I have to say it IS the best way to describe him to me._

 _JustCallMeLucie : I don't really try to do it, really, it just happens. I was writing the story and after a while I decided that yeah, Luffy had to give Zoro advice, but he can't do it like a normal person, right? So he has to interrupt him and start talking about something that makes no sense to Zoro and then explain himself later. And then I was like, "Oh God, he's getting to serious!" and decided that yeah, Luffy's that character who gets it, but at the same time, just doesn't get it. He has his moments. I really like making others feel something through my writing. I find the easiest thing to do is to make someone laugh so when I can move them to tears or to feel regret or something like strong compassion, I really feel accomplished that I got feeling across to them without saying a word aloud._

 _Raigon: Thanks! I was really nervous about writing this story since I don't usually write stories like this, but I've always wanted to. I'm glad you like it!_

 _Muffin : Welcome aboard! Since most people don't approve of my writing (ahem, my family, ahem), I'm really happy when people tell me they like my stuff. Makes me feel like I'm not wasting my time, you know?_

 _Reina : Okay, so I'll say this: I'm not offended, but it's more like I'm irritated and not at you. It was like I was reading your points and was trying to come up with answers to give you and when I realized I could give you none I was like, "Damn, does that make me a horrible author to have so many plot holes?" I can answer that question about Sanji and the cooks though, about him not fighting them. In this story, Sanji's self-confidence is very low so he probably didn't feel like he could handle them. He also thinks that this is the restaurant he and Zeff made and he doesn't want to leave because Zeff will be back and it would be like he abandoned him if he left, which is why he didn't run away. There's more to it but that's all I'm going to tell you. Sanji's hit to Zoro was one that was made out of anger that first time he kicked him in the head. Sanji didn't know he could do that. His fight with Luffy was a) Luffy going easy on him at least a little and b) Sanji was experimenting what he could do. You'd be surprised what you're capable of with adrenalin in your system. I know that doesn't really explain everything, but I'm trying to come up with an answer._

 _lilcutieprincess (x2): I don't know, I just needed Zoro drunk really and I always figured he'd be the ticklish type too. It's fine about not reviewing yet, but I'm happy you reviewed in the end!_

 _Sabinah : Sorry that this chapter is so depressing! But anyway, I always liked writing about confused characters, they're just fun, getting into their minds and all. Anyway, random question for you, you know how " **kawai** " means "cute", or if you don't, it does mean cute in Japanese, but the word for scary in Japanese is " **kowai** ", which is pretty damn confusing to me. I'm just saying this cause you wrote " **Kyaaa** " which I realize is nothing like these words, but I just had to ask._

 _Okay now what Sanji said? it's so weird that Sanji spoke French! But what Sanji said was: **"You irritate me."**_

 _Now people seem to think Luffy's good at giving love advice, but now I shall ask you two questions instead of one. You can answer them both if you want to._

 _In this chapter, Sanji quotes Shakespeare. Keep in mind this is a long question. Now here's the question, **what Shakespeare play is it from, who said it, in what scene and act, give it context, then tell me what you think it means.**_

 _BONUS QUESTION: Zoro and Sanji both say they each have fucked up genes. **Who do you think has more screwed up genes? Zoro (green hair) or Sanji (fucked up eyebrow)?**_

 _ **I have one request: I'd really like to reach a hundred reviews before I update my next chapter! I won't wait until there are, but it'd be really cool if there was!**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	17. Sulking Like A Man

_**Author's Note:** Okay so I had to go ahead and watch Zoro's fight with Bones to have any idea about how Bones fought. That's how far behind I am in the series, but anyways, moving onward. The first half of this story was harder to write than the rest, I had fun with the hospital scene though, but I'm not a doctor and don't know anything about how it works either. This is fanfiction and that's why I'm throwing logic out the window in terms of how the hospital and blood loss work. I think I have it vaguely down though. So fact: I did some research in terms of the team's blood types. So Zoro's blood type, FX, actually means AB, which makes more sense to me now. But moving onwards, another thing was that Sanji had blood type O (written S with a negative sign), so because O negative is the universal donor, I was like, "SANJI HAS TO DONATE HIS BLOOD!" But then I checked if anyone else could donate blood, and the answer was, out of the character I've introduced and out of them all, Luffy had blood type AB, but it was positive and it never specified about Zoro's, Usopp's was O positive and Nami had just A, which meant she and Sanji could donate under the assumption Zoro's blood type was negative. So I was like, "YAY!" But anyway, I also changed Zoro's swords, well, one of his swords, for a reason which will be discovered later! The fact that three hours after posting chapter 16 I had 100 reviews is just ... Wow. I'm kinda still in shock. But anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and I don't own **One Piece.** I can't believe in like, three weeks, I've written over 100 thousand words! As usual, thanks for the reviews will be below at the end._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**  
By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of self-harm, past abuse**

* * *

Chapter 17: Sulking Like A Man

* * *

It is a truth universally acknowledged that three-sword-style swordsman with green hair did not sulk.

At least, that's what Zoro Roronoa tried to convince himself of.

He wasn't going to Partys with all of his swords, out for blood because he was sulking over his somewhat existent, not entirely well-founded feelings for Sanji. In fact, the cook didn't mean anything to him besides friendship. He hadn't had a horrible nightmare that lead toward him curling up into a little ball and trying not to blubber like a baby. Nope. Not at all.

Little known fact about Zoro Roronoa: he was the master at denial.

"Hey Makino," Zoro greeted the barmaid with a forced smile. He didn't know how Sanji did it all the time— _no, do not think about Sanji, bad brain, bad!_

"Afternoon Zoro," replied the young woman. "You'll be fighting tonight?"

Zoro nodded. "Are there any good people worth fighting tonight?" he asked.

Makino's smile turned into a slight frown. "Zoro, what are you doing?"

Zoro shrugged. "Just going to fight a little, I haven't done it in a while. Is it wrong?"

Makino stared at him scrutinizingly. "Zoro, what's wrong?"

"What do you mean 'what's wrong'?" Zoro let out a laugh, feeling as though it couldn't have possibly been more fake. "I'm fine. You sure _you're_ okay?"

"Being reckless doesn't pay," Makino told him strictly. "You know that." Her eyes wandered towards Zoro's chest, as though to trace the length of the scar with her eyes, despite the fact that he wasn't shirtless.

Zoro knew. He knew probably more than anyone, but he wasn't going to tell her that. Besides, he wasn't being reckless. He was just taking his mind off things. Since taking in the cook, it seemed he was almost all Zoro thought about. Training Sanji, helping Sanji, cooking with Sanji, waking Sanji up from another nightmare, introducing Sanji to others, worrying about Sanji … kissing Sanji (once and only once. Zoro would only ever make that mistake once).

"I know Makino," he said.

Though it was brief, he felt as though his conversation with the barmaid had cooled his head just a little. That didn't mean he didn't still want to fight, it just meant that instead of going out for blood, he was thinking maybe a couple of bruises and a bashed in face. "So, can I go down?"

Makino nodded, watching Zoro with worried eyes but the swordsman didn't look back as he defended the stairs.

"Yo, Big Bro Zoro!" Johnny said with a big smile. "You finally going to fight tonight?"

"Yeah, we've been waiting for a match since forever," Yosaku said, giving Zoro a big clap on the back. He stopped suddenly, looking at Zoro in confusion. "Hey, where's Big Bro Sanji?"

"Not here," Zoro snapped. Just hearing Sanji's name did weird things to him. The reason he was here was so he could stop thinking about Sanji, so he wouldn't have to focus on anything, not to hear about the cook from his friends. "You gonna let me in?"

"Rude," Johnny said. "Is something up, Big Bro?"

"I'm fine," Zoro insisted. "Just let me in, okay?"

Johnny and Yosaku looked at each other before glancing at Zoro.

"If you say so, Big Bro," said Yosaku, letting him in.

Zoro entered the arena and looked around. There were a bunch of people here who weren't worth fighting, he knew that already. He didn't see any of his other friends around either. That was good, that meant he didn't have to be lectured by them about how irrational he was being, even if he was completely of sound mind and body to himself. Luffy would look at him with that stare he always got whenever he realized something wasn't right because of course the straw hat had to become perceptive at the worst time possible and Nami would probably press for answers while Usopp told him yet another story about that strange person he knew who was going through problems exactly like his, except his problems involved a walrus. He loved his friends, he really did, but he couldn't handle them some days.

The only person he couldn't escape when at Partys was Ace, and that was because he was always the ref for the matches. Ace was cool, Zoro was sure he could trust him to keep his mouth shut.

"Hey Ace," he said, approaching the tall man. "You think there's anyone worth fighting tonight?"

"Zoro!" Ace smiled widely. "Finally going to get back in the ring?"

"Figured it was about time," Zoro told him with a shrug. "So, who do you have for me?"

"Well, you could try Bones," said Ace. "They say he's one of the best," he added.

"Never heard of him. Who is he?"

Ace pointed towards the corner and Zoro was surprised he hadn't seen the guy earlier. He was enormous. Bigger than Patty— no, thinking about Patty meant thinking about Sanji, thinking about Sanji meant … fuck, Zoro didn't even know anymore. "How does he fight?"

"Martial artist," Ace said. "He's really tough, some even say his skin's made of steel."

"I can see that," Zoro said. "Okay, I'll fight him."

Ace nodded and blew his whistle, making the match official. With so many people, Zoro ignored the voices and instead focused on his opponent. He was large, but the larger they were, the harder they fell. He stepped into the arena and put Wado in his mouth as usual, taking his other swords out and readying his stance.

Bones smirked when he entered the ring. "You think you can beat me, little shrimp?" he asked. He let out a loud laugh. "Santoryu, eh? Haven't seen someone fight that way in a while." The man cracked his knuckles menacingly, growling as he took a step closer to Zoro. "Three swords won't be enough to save you, moss head."

Zoro grit his teeth, Wado firmly placed in his mouth. He was ready to fight. He _wanted_ to fight. And he wanted to make Bones bleed. Just a little.

"Okay, you know the rules," Ace said, standing on top of his usual table. "You fight until one can't go on, there's no time limit, try to keep the fight inside the ring. The fight ends when one of the two can no longer go on, we, the crowd, determine whether or not the match is over. We're not aiming to kill, but other than that, no rules apply. When I blow my whistle, we start."

Zoro could vaguely hear the crowd counting down, but the only sound that reached his ears was the loud "FIGHT!" screamed in unison by the entire bar.

And fight Zoro did.

The first one to strike, no one could tell since the two fighters moved instantly. Zoro made to attack with two swords right at Bones' chest, but Bones had a strike ready for Zoro, preparing to hit him in the gut. They both took force of the impact, but Zoro had trouble standing, instead staggering for a few steps before forcing himself upright. Bones looked unaffected by Zoro.

"No swordsman's ever cut me," said Bones as though this were something to brag about. It was impressive and had Zoro been thinking straight, he might've thought to get out of the ring immediately. But of course, Zoro would never think straight. "What makes you think you can?"

"I'll be the first," Zoro said, his eyes analyzing Bones.

So the man was big, okay, he could give him that. He was big and he was buff as well. But where was his weakness? It had to be somewhere. It had been a while since Zoro had to analyze an opponent. After nearly a month of fighting against Sanji, he had learnt how to read the cook's movements perfectly to the point where he didn't even have to look to block, but that didn't mean the blond didn't keep him on his toes.

In Sanji's cast, his centre of gravity was his hips. All it took for Zoro to read Sanji's movements was to watch Sanji's hips move throughout the entire battle. So where was the centre of this man's gravity? Where did Zoro need to keep his eyes? And how did you cut someone who's skin was practically made of steel?

The big man let out a laugh that sounded beyond sinister. "We'll see about that."

 _Where? Where do I focus?_

 _CRASH!_

Too late. Zoro's attention hadn't been on this man and he was thrown out of the ring, into a startled couple's table. He picked himself up off the ground and wiped his face, the beer wetting his clothes. He stood back up and Bones looked down at him.

"I'll give you that you're still standing," he said, "most people would be knocked out by a blow like that, but this just means you'll suffer more." Bones picked Zoro up and Wado was left on the floor, having been dropped when Zoro had crashed into the table. He tried to grab it but Bones came even closer to his face, snarling. "Do you even know how to fight with those swords?" he asked. "They're sharp, but they seem like they're only for decoration. You call yourself a swordsman?"

Zoro kicked at Bones harshly, but the man didn't move.

"Listen to me moss head, if you know what's good for you, you'll back out now."

Surrender? The word wasn't even in Zoro's vocabulary.

Zoro pushed at Bones body, trying to wiggle his way out of the bigger man's grip. His big meaty hands just reminded him of Patty even more and that made him think of Sanji and thinking of Sanji and Patty made him even angrier, knowing what that bastard had done to his cook.

 _SMACK!_

A nicely aimed punch hit Bones squarely in the nose. The man blinked, surprised and his grip loosened. Zoro hit the floor and grabbed Wado, ready to fight again. He was fuelled up.

"That was nothing," Zoro told him. "You gonna fight me for real this time?"

Bones turned on him.

 _Watch his movements._

Bones took a step back and got back into the ring, backing himself up to the edge of it so he'd have the best view of Zoro.

 _Read his moves._

He watched as Bones started running, the way he raised his arm. His shoulder was going straight, which meant he'd be going straight forward, right? He'd be punching Zoro. Now where exactly would he punch him?

 _Predict._

His elbow was going downwards, which meant that he was going to attack somewhere near Zoro's stomach, or his legs. Knowing the kind of fighter he seemed to be, he wouldn't be playing cheap tricks like he and Sanji did, grabbing at ankles. No, the man would go straight for Zoro's gut.

 _Calculate._

How long would it take him to get to him? What did he have to do to avoid it? If he moved right now, Bones could still change his direction and Zoro would have to start all over.

 _Stay._

Bones came closer, his fist raised … The shoulder was going downwards, his elbow was also going down, which meant …

 _Now!_

Zoro jumped up and flipped over Bones, missing an underhanded punch towards his stomach. His blades brushed across the man's shoulders as he flipped, before he landed on the other side of him, in the ring.

 _Okay, this makes him even easier to read than Sa— easier to read than others. Now where's his weak point? I can read as much as I want, but that won't put me on the offence, that'll force me onto the defensive, which means there has to be some way to strike a weak spot. His were the junction in his knee, if you threw that off, he wouldn't be able to stand, and he leaves his upper body open whenever he attacks, plus the time it takes him to lift his foot off the ground. What about this guy? What are his weak spots?_

"Impressive, ballerina," said Bones though he was clearly being sarcastic.

 _Watch. Don't close your eyes._

He turned back around and raised his fist again.

 _Shoulder's facing upward, elbow's facing up. Going for the face then._

Zoro leaned back and avoided the hit but he watched Bones even after the attack had been administered. He was slightly off balance.

 _The force he uses … if it doesn't hit anything, the amount of momentum he has is suddenly stopped, which means …_

Zoro watched once more. Bones was going for his neck. He flipped over him again, before instead of attacking with his swords, he pushed on Bones' back as he flipped over. Bones fell forward at the sudden imbalance and crashed into another couple's table.

Was this like seeing a wrestling match? Was that the kind of date that poor brunette was being subjected to? He felt bad for her.

Zoro counted in his head once his feet touched the ground.

 _Zero point twenty-eight, point twenty-nine, point thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three—_

Bones was back on his feet.

"Enough with the acrobatics," Bones snarled. "Time to end this!"

 _Shoulder's going south, elbow's north. Right. Meet him … now!_

Zoro crossed his blades placed them lower on his body, protecting his stomach and half of his thighs. Bones fist tried to push against the blades, but Zoro held strong. He had to admit that Bones was strong, it was taking an effort not to skid backwards but he figured he had ruined enough dates tonight. Using his third sword, he nodded his head forward, slashing at Bones' wrist.

As the smallest droplet of crimson hit the floor, Zoro smirked. Victory.

Bones staggered back and judging from the look on his face, he was in shock that Zoro had managed to cut him. What did this guy think of him? Zoro wasn't a weakling, he could stand his own and he'd do just fine against this guy. Especially since he had figured out how to fight him properly.

Bones took a step forward and went at Zoro again.

 _Shoulder's north, elbow's north._

Zoro moved quickly around the man as his fist came out and struck him in the back using two of his blades. Bones wobbled but quickly regained his balance. He was learning how to recover faster. That was new. He spun around and went to kick at Zoro.

Zoro smirked.

Reading upper body movements was harder for Zoro, but form the waist down? Well, he had this one in the bag.

Zoro charged himself forwards as the foot swept over where Zoro had been and instead, he hit Bones squarely in the chest. He fell onto his back from the force and Zoro got on top of him, ready to throw a punch.

Unfortunately, he was right where Bones wanted him.

Bones punched Zoro in the jaw and his head shot back. He could feel his brain moving around in his head as the man took another punch at him. Since Zoro's legs were firmly around the man, he couldn't move when the man aimed another punch and his nose started bleeding.

 _Dammit, I think he broke it!_

He tried to time Bones' hits, to catch his arm before it connected with his face again, but the thing about Bones was that there was no rhyme or reason to his attacks. He didn't time anything, he hit when an opportunity was there and since Zoro was currently as open as he had ever been in all his years of fighting. As a result, Zoro's face had seen better days.

Instead of waiting for timing, Zoro decided to screw strategies and instead just hit at the man before him as well. He found some pride in the fact that now the man was trying to dodge his attacks. Dodging. How come Zoro had never thought of that? It probably had something to do about a certain person whom he never dared to think of at the moment.

Zoro managed to hit Bones pretty nicely in the jaw. Bones took a moment to readjust, and Zoro took that time to grab his big, meaty arm and flip it over him.

This resulted in successfully getting the man off of him, but since Zoro was sort of stuck on the man's legs, his ground was wiped out from under him and he fell rather harshly on the wood floor.

He stood up quickly and prepared to hit again, his swords back in hand. He launched himself at the fallen Bones and began to strike at his chest various times, starting to tear through the man's shirt. With a few bruises, bleeding in a few places and one finally knock out punch from Zoro, he was declared the winner.

"Hey, Zoro," said Ace when it was over, whispering in his ear as he raised Zoro's arm in victory. "Something up?"

"Nothing," Zoro said, his breathing harsh.

"You sure? Cause that didn't look like nothing," Ace said.

"Yeah well, just cause you think something's there, doesn't mean it is," Zoro told him. "Anyone else I can fight?"

Ace looked at him. "You're pretty worn out from that fight with Bones," he said, "You sure you don't want to rest?"

"No." Resting meant he'd think. Thinking meant he'd eventually think of something in general that would link itself to the blond cook and then he'd get a headache no Tylenol could fix. He'd probably end up having a mental break down, wondering what the cook thought of him and whether or not it was worth it to say anything about the strange feeling in his chest.

"I'll fight him."

Everyone turned to see a man who carried a large sword on his back. Instantly, Zoro's eyes widened.

"Mihawk?"

"I'll fight you, Zoro Roronoa," said Mihawk. "That is, if you think you can beat me."

Mihawk … God Mihawk annoyed him to no ends. The last time he had fought against him had no ended well and knowing that, he was certain that taking him up on the challenge was pure suicide.

Dracule Mihawk, the greatest swordsman in Japan. He was undefeated and had won over a thousand competitions, including several against Zoro. He hated losing to this man, arrogant and conceited. The title of best swordsman … a man that self-absorbed surely didn't deserve it.

"You're on," Zoro told him.

"Zoro, are you sure?" Ace asked, a worry creasing his brow.

Zoro waved off Ace's concern. "This'll be nothing."

The two entered the ring and it was right before Ace blew the whistle that Zoro realized his face and ribs hurt. A lot.

"I won't bother with my sword," said Mihawk. "I'm sure this'll work just fine." He pulled out what looked like a small pocket-knife out of his cross necklace. "Now, come at me, Zoro Roronoa."

It was perhaps a battle that lasted fifteen seconds at most.

Zoro tried to fight with Sandai and Yubashiri, but they were both deflected. He jumped back and then Mihawk threw his knife at him, hitting him in the arm. It seemed to cut deep and mixed with the loss of blood from the fight with Bones, Zoro was feeling woozy. It took him about five seconds afterwards for him to fall to his knees.

Zoro pulled the knife out of his arm and threw it back at Mihawk, but it merely clattered at the man's feet instead of piercing his leg like Zoro had wished.

"Try again when you get better," said Mihawk. "I could've pierced your heart, but you weren't paying full attention, were you?" He frowned. "I don't fight half-hearted battles."

* * *

The world was spinning. It wasn't the same spinning as a hangover, but it was causing Zoro's head to hurt. Already it was pounding and he felt a horrible pain in his chest that he couldn't properly describe. He could hear the sound of high heels— no, fancy sandals, like the ones Nami wore, racing towards him. He felt a hand on his shoulder, rough and demanding.

"Zoro! Zoro, you have to keep your eyes open!" That was Luffy. What was going on?

"Baka! Are you trying to get yourself killed?" And that was Nami. A vague blur of red hair was visible in front of him, but it hurt to concentrate.

"Someone call Sanji," said Luffy.

Zoro reached out desperately to grab a hold of someone, anyone. He grabbed Nami's arm and pulled her to him. "Don't," he croaked out. Though he couldn't see straight and speaking made him nauseous, he repeated it. "Don't call Sanji."

"What are you talking about, of course we need to call Sanji!" Nami told him. "You're just disorientated, we'll just call him though. Don't worry, okay?" she said. "This way Sanji'll know and he won't have to worry when you don't turn up back at the apartment. Well, actually, he _will_ worry either way, but—"

"Liar," Zoro choked.

"Huh?" Nami turned to him while he could vaguely see Luffy pulling out his phone, scratching his head. He probably didn't know Sanji's number.

"He won't care," Zoro said softly.

"Of course he'll care! What are you, brain damaged?" Nami shook her head and tried to hoist Zoro up, but faltered. "Usopp, help me here!"

He felt his body being lifted from the ground and though the world had stopped spinning, his vision was even more blurry. He tried to grab onto something to steady himself but Nami and Usopp were holding onto his arms so tightly it restricted his movement. He was sure if he fought hard enough, they'd have to let him go, but his footing was weak and he didn't trust himself to move without vomiting.

As they lumbered him to the hospital, there was only one thing going through his mind.

 _Sanji doesn't care. Not as much as I do._

* * *

His arm felt weird.

Zoro opened his eyes blearily and stared down at his left arm. _There's some kind of … wire? No, tube, stuck in my arm. Why the hell is there— wait, that's an IV._

"What the fuck am I doing in the hospital?"

"Oh, you're awake!"

Zoro looked up and met Nami's eyes. "What's going on?"

Nami seemed to think for a while before answering. "You kind of … passed out from blood loss," she said. "We brought you here and you won't be able to use your arm for a while, which means no fighting either." She took a brief pause before continuing. "You were lucky, Mihawk hit pretty deep. It broke some tissue and your bone is fractured. You'll need a sling, but it isn't fatal or anything. Sanji donated some blood for you, so you'd better thank him when he gets here."

"Sanji?"

"Yeah, you know, the blond cook?" Nami shook her head. "You should've seen him. He was having a total mental break down, screaming. When they asked what your blood type was, he immediately offered his blood. I would've offered mine, but by the time I managed to tell them I could donate, Sanji had already done it." She glanced at Zoro. "Did you know … um, about his arms?"

Zoro was groggy, but he knew instantly what she meant.

Sanji's arms were covered in markings. Cuts and burns, earned from hours in the kitchen, beatings from the cooks and himself. "If you say a word about it, I'll kill you."

Nami shook her head. "It isn't my business," she said. "But Zoro?"

"Yeah?"

"There were …" She took a deep breath. "Some of the cuts … they looked recent. Like maybe a day or two old."

Zoro's eyes widened. Before he could ask about it, he heard the sound of pushing and shoving outside the door.

"Let me in!" That was Sanji. "I already told you, I'm his friend, you have to let me in! What, is it only one person at a time? He isn't that injured!" There was a huff and then, "Nami, get the fuck out of there, I need to talk to him!"

Zoro's eyes got even bigger, if it was possible. Sanji swearing at a woman? Sanji considered himself too much of a gentleman to ever do such a thing, which meant whatever he wanted to tell Zoro was urgent. Urgent enough to make him scream like that.

Nami sighed and turned to the door. "Maybe if you put out that cigarette and put away the swords—"

"I don't trust them with them!" Sanji screamed back.

 _Swords? Does that mean …?_

The doorknob moved and then Sanji was standing before them, holding Zoro's three sheathed swords in his hand. He threw them onto the bed and grumbled. "There, Marimo. I had to fight with them for a long time to be allowed to give these back to you, so you'd better be grateful, asshole!"

"Don't throw sharp things at the ill!" Nami snapped.

"Ill?' Sanji repeated. "They were sheathed! And besides, the idiot's laughing!"

Zoro held his stomach at the scene. It was quite funny.

"I don't know how grateful I am to someone who calls me an asshole," Zoro told Sanji with a smirk. "Would you like to rephrase that?"

"No, I will fucking not," Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "Seriously, you wouldn't believe this guy was bleeding out a few hours ago." Sanji ran a finger through his hair and for a second, Zoro thought he might've seen his other eye, but the curtain of hair fell back before he could be sure.

"I'll leave you two alone," said Nami with a laugh.

The two of them stayed in silence as she left and were still quiet when the door shut.

Finally, Zoro spoke. "You shouldn't pass the chemicals of your cigarette onto the bedridden," Zoro told him.

"Fuck you," Sanji snapped, turning on him. "Do you have any idea how fucking stupid you are? Getting into a fight with someone when you weren't thinking straight! I couldn't find you in the apartment, so I figured you'd gone to Luffy's but then when I called, he didn't answer and then just when I thought you had gotten yourself lost again, I get a call from Luffy saying that I need to come to Partys and see to it that you don't die! Fuck, I'm supposed to be the suicidal one here, remember?"

"About that," Zoro said, about to lecture him on the new cuts Nami had mentioned— regardless of how stupid it would seem coming from a man who was currently in a hospital bed— when Sanji cut him off.

"No, there's nothing about it! There's nothing to say! Do you have any idea how much blood you lost? I'm still woozy from the amount of blood I had to donate, you fucking moron! Are you fucking insane? You just … Luffy said you just collapsed when he came to the bar. I spoke to Ace, what the fuck was that bastard thinking, letting you fight in your condition? No, what the fuck were _you_ thinking, you fucking ahou?! I'll tell you what you were thinking, you _weren't_ thinking! You should know your body, be able to tell your own condition, should know when you reach your fucking limits! You don't fucking push them until you collapse, anyone with some common sense would know that! Do you have any idea what it was like to see your body there? Just … just limp and …" Sanji stopped, unable to formulate his next sentence. He chewed on his cigarette harshly and Zoro could see it was well worn. "Are you fucking stupid? Did you think you could just pass out like that and I wouldn't care? Don't you dare pull another stunt like that, Zoro Roronoa, you have no idea how w—" Sanji stopped, biting harshly on his cigarette. It went out and he threw into the trash bin. Zoro expected Sanji to continue but instead, the cook put his fist against his mouth, as though to stop himself from talking.

"Were you … worried?" Zoro asked, holding his breath for the answer.

"Fuck no," Sanji snapped. His body seemed to lurch forward when he spoke but once he was done, he stepped back and seemed to recoil into himself.

Though Zoro was coming to terms with Sanji not liking him in the strange way that Zoro somewhat, possibly thought he felt towards the blond, he had still hoped he was important enough for the cook to worry about, even just a little.

"You sure?" he asked. The answer he was expecting, he wasn't sure. It wouldn't do good to hear the same answer that he dreaded twice, but he said it anyway.

Sanji stared out the small window at the modern Tokyo landscape. One of his hands gripped his arm. Zoro realized it was his left arm. He was holding his left arm like it was in pain. Sanji was silent, refusing to look at Zoro. Just when he thought he'd get no answer, Sanji spoke. "… No."

 _What?_

Sanji still wouldn't look at him, but he continued. "Well, what do you think I did when I found out? Just cause you see me as a freeloader, doesn't mean that I don't give a damn about you," he said in a soft voice. "Of course I was fucking worried, Marimo."

It was so quiet, Zoro almost didn't hear it, but he did.

Maybe Sanji didn't care for him like that, maybe he'd never care for him that way, but Zoro knew that for the moment in the quiet of the hospital with the moonlight shining in through the window, in the confines of this room, right now, it was enough.

Sanji turned to him again, dropping his arm almost instantly. "Now go to bed," Sanji snapped and though he had probably taken time to compose himself, Zoro could've sworn he saw the lightest trace of red on Sanji's cheeks. "No one gets better without rest," he said.

Sanji took long strides out of the room, Zoro watching his every move. He stopped at the door, shutting off the lights. "I'll … I'll see you tomorrow."

Zoro couldn't help smiling but in the dark of the room, who could tell? "Night Curly Brow."

There was silence. Then—

"Night, Marimo."

There was the sound of the door slamming shut and then the room fell into silence.

Yeah, for now, it was enough.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Now for the thank-yous!_

 _Sabinah (x3) : As I've mentioned before, I take great joy in making people awkward. This time it was Sanji's turn to be awkward! I hope you liked him in this chapter, I thought he was absolutely adorable. I know tons of pointless games that can be played without the need of paper and just two people, but none of my friends like them cause they find them boring. Don't worry though, Sanji and Zoro have tons of other games they can play that haven't been introduced yet. If I were to ask Zoro for love advice, (because I think he'd just be the most amusing to get it from), I'd be like, "I have problems. You can't leave till you solve them!" And then he'd probably be traumatized._

 _Guest: Zoro didn't cry. Yet._

 _S.P. Tripathi: I'm really glad you liked it! Just making others feel something through writing is always my goal. Before I write the chapter, I'm just like, "What do I want to make them feel?" And sometimes I succeed and sometimes I don't, but I'm really happy when I do. Even when that emotion is to bawl your eyes out._

 _JustCallMeLucie : You sound like my friend, accepting that there are dickheads everywhere. For school I had to read the word in this section of a book and I just stared at it and I was like, "I won't freak out, I won't freak out" but then the character was like, "What did you just call me?" and they repeated it again and I threw the book down in the middle of class and my friends turned to me (we had free reading time) and were like, "What's going on?" And I swear my answer was, "I think I'm going to be sick." Fact: Sanji has asymmetrical eyebrows. Death the Kid would hate him._

 _crystalbluefox : Zoro and Sanji are both idiots, which is why we will have fun watching them run in circles and laugh at their clumsy, awkward mistakes that seem endearing to us fangirls._

 _minichampi : Really? I thought he was going pretty quick, in comparison to Sanji at least. See, the thing is, I like development of a relationship, where you get to learn everything about that person before you actually get into a relationship with them, instead of learning them as the relationship gets more serious. I think it's nice that way too, but I'm a sucker for development._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : Okay, I wish that too, but can you honestly picture Zoro doing that?_

 _Keitsu Han'ei: Um, Zeff kinda hasn't been around recently ... I'm still planning his entry._

 _Nessiebaby : So um, I have no clue who has that other fucked up eyebrow. I looked up curly eyebrows one piece and got a forum instead talking about how both of Sanji's eyebrows are screwed up. I tried! In terms of the length of a review, I really don't think there's a limit. On the mobil site, they'll give you a limited number of characters but it's like, 100000, so you can write a lot. I really wanted to do a parallel chapter and I hope I did it well! I might do more, if anyone asks._

 _Raigon : It's just that insecurities stop us from doing lots of things and sure, Sanji knows Zoro better then when he first kicked him, but I think Sanji's still not sure. It doesn't take much to make someone doubt themselves. That's what makes us human, so of course, as awesome as it would've been for Sanji to totally kick their asses, I think that this was more believable._

 _lilcutieprincess : I don't think Sanji waxes his eyebrows. I don't think he thinks there's anything wrong with them. But just imagine Sanji with normal eyebrows? It doesn't work in my head._

 _Muffin : You demanded, I delivered. Now I just hope you liked the delivery._

 _Tulula-Mate: I enjoy making my readers feel compassion and connect with the story. Besides the characters and plot, its the readers and they're reaction and enthusiasm towards a story that brings it to life._

 _Okay about Sanji's line from Shakespeare ... God, I felt like an English teacher when I asked you that, but it's from **Romeo & Juliet,** act II, scene ii, also known as the Balcony Scene (I had to rewrite the scene for school with new characters who had a physical barrier between them (like a table or something) and had a forbidden love. I did a gay story, logically. It was awesome.) In this scene, Romeo's outside Juliet's balcony and she tells him that if he weren't a Montague, she'd still love him, his name means nothing to her. To me, this basically means that whatever happens, a person is still the same person, even if their name changes or if they might look different, they're personality is still the same. Thanks to Nessiebaby, who actually answered this question._

 _Okay, now for the fucked up eyebrows VS green hair:_

 _Green hair: 4_

 _Fucked up eyebrows: 3_

 _Close, isn't it? But anyway, now for my question: the very first sentence of this chapter was a parody on one of the most famous beginning lines of a book in English literature. **So tell me, what was the name of that book, who wrote it and for bonus points, when was it published?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	18. Lady's Man?

_**Author's Note:** Okay so I don't own **One Piece** , or anything else mentioned in this chapter because I'm kinda too lazy to check if I mentioned anything else. This chapter was one that I was actually really paranoid about, whether or not it would be too short or not. I was writing it and was like, "God this is going nowhere and I can't think of anything!" so that's why the ending ending up the way it is. Now, at some point in this chapter, you might not be able to follow what Sanji's saying. I'm going to tell you this: he's thinking aloud, literally, which means there's no exact immediate connection with his thoughts. Interestingly, this is how I string together thoughts in my own mind. I'm very easily distracted. So another thing: the reason why Sanji and Zoro are so loose-tongued at the end are because they're both exhausted. I'm rarely ever coherent when I'm tired and I know it's really fluffy, but taking into consideration the setting and all, I feel like this was perfect and not out of character for them. Thanks for the comments will be at the end, with a question (and a bonus question this time too!), an answer to the past question and uh, yeah, I think that's it. I'm really looking forward to writing chapter 19 and I think you guys are going to like it! I hope you like this chapter! On a side note: today is Harry Potter and **Harry Potter** 's author, JK Rowlings' birthday!_

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 18: Lady's Man?

* * *

It was quiet. Too quiet.

It wasn't as though Sanji wasn't used to being in a rather quiet apartment, but for some reason, he had gotten used to the strange acoustics. Between practicing with Zoro and the noise Zoro made while Sanji was cooking the latest meal, the apartment had become a place of an assortment of subtle noises that weren't all loud, but were definitely not silent either.

With the lack of a soundtrack, Sanji found that it was … rather strange.

 _That Marimo's not hurt that badly that he has to stay at the hospital, is he? Am I underestimating the wound? Fuck, no, I'm not going to start thinking about him. Not again, I did enough of that yesterday._

Sanji tried to keep the smile off his face as he went through the fridge, trying to remember where he had put the vegetables.

"Sanji?"

Sanji's head hit the top of a shelf and he muttered profanities until he turned around and saw Nami standing in the doorway.

"This place is quiet, isn't it?" she asked. "Without Zoro, I mean."

Sanji bit his lip and considered what his answer would be. If he said yes, would that mean she'd think something of it? Nami seemed to have been giving him this knowing look ever since he had donated his blood the night before, like she knew something and Sanji had just confirmed her suspicions about it. Then again, he could just be paranoid. Especially since living with the cooks hardly made him relaxed. "Well yeah," he said, "but that's mainly cause he grunts and lumbers around like an elephant."

That was a lie. Zoro was graceful whenever he fought Sanji and when he walked through the apartment. To be fair though, that grace had disappeared when he had gotten drunk, but Sanji had been the one to get him drunk in the first place so … Sanji shook his head. No, being away from Zoro was a good thing, to sort out his head and figure out how he'd handle what Patty had said. He knew his first reaction wasn't well-thought out, it was impulsive, like all first reactions really. Of course, Zoro going and getting himself injured would of course, do nothing to help him whatsoever on the topic of clearing his mind, but he couldn't control the marimo, now could he?

"Liar," Nami said, calling him out on it.

"I meant to apologize for last night," Sanji said, rubbing his neck. "I um … I didn't mean to swear at you." He sheepishly dug his foot into the ground, as though trying to dig a hole to some other country far away from the redhead.

"It's fine, it's not like Zoro censors himself around me," Nami replied with a shrug. "Besides if I remember correctly, your first words to us all were something along the lines of … 'who the fuck are you?' if my memory serves me right."

Sanji stared at her. "Nami!" He grinned widely. "I never knew you had such a mouth," he teased.

Nami rolled her eyes. "Anyway, Luffy and I are going to be having a dinner tonight at our house. Do you want to come?"

Sanji looked at her. "Come?" he repeated. "Don't you mean cook?"

Nami laughed. "I'm not like Zoro, I won't make you work like a slave," she said. "No, we'll be ordering out and just have a get together. Usopp'll be there. We need to talk about … something."

"Vague much?"

Nami rolled her eyes. "Anyway, are you going to come?"

"I've never been to Luffy's," Sanji told her. "Remember?"

Nami nodded. "I can give you directions, it won't be that hard to get there. It's pretty close to here actually. But you know, since Zoro's so directionally inept, he takes over half an hour to find a place that's actually ten minutes away." She shrugged. "I think I can trust you to find your way there."

"I'll just take a cab," Sanji said with a shrug.

"Why? Zoro's got a car," Nami said. "He can't drive in the condition he's in, his keys are in the house, right?"

"Shit apartment."

Nami gave him a strange look. "What?"

"It's …" Sanji shrugged. "It's kinda a weird thing we do, but it's not a house. I don't know, I just got into an argument with Zoro once about the place and said that he shouldn't have helped me and he said I had a roof over my head and I told him it was a shitty roof and —" Sanji shook his head. "Never mind."

"No, I want to hear this," Nami said. "After all, Zoro rarely ever lets someone get away with an insult. You know what? I'll give you our address and when you come, you're going to tell us all those stories about Zoro and you, alright? I'd like to know how much you bruised his ego." She grinned. "And of course, you know this means you have to come, right?"

Sanji gave her a smile. It was the first time he had ever smiled at someone other than Zoro with a slightly less-than fake smile. "Wouldn't miss it for the world, My Lady," he said.

"I'm committed," she told him with a laugh. "But if I wasn't …" Her eyes scanned over Sanji in a way that almost made him feel self-conscious, before she flashed him a grin. "Well, it doesn't matter since I am." She gave him a piece of paper with an address on it and a time. With that and a quick "see you tonight!" she was gone.

* * *

It was two hours before Sanji had to leave when he realized he had no fucking clue what to wear.

Sure, Nami made it sound casual, but what if it wasn't? What if this was … he didn't know, some kind of test on whether or not he was worthy to be Zoro's friend or some other kind of shit like that? Or he was overthinking it. Or he was thinking just the right amount and needed a good suit.

He went into his closet and took out his usual blazer. It always looked good to him, but Zoro's friends had probably only ever seen him wearing such a thing. He frowned. He could wear a pinstriped shirt, or should he wear a plain one? Should he not bother with the blazer? Fuck, when was the las time he panicked this much?

He settled for wearing a light blue button-down shirt, which complimented his eyes and his usual pair of black dress pants. He combed through his hair and worried about it the entire cab ride there until they pulled up in front of Luffy's house.

It was a small place, humble, like he'd expect from Luffy. He walked up the entrance way and rang the doorbell. Immediately afterwards, he backed up and turned his back to the door. He ran his fingers through his hair, played with the cuff of his sleeves, fiddled with a non-existent piece of lint attached to his leg, picked at the seam of his waist-line, shoved his hands in his pockets, tapped his foot endlessly. He stared at his boots and contemplated whether or not he should've worn nicer shoes. There was no backing out now— well, he could call the taxi back, it wasn't too late to leave, right?

He fidgeted, lighting a cigarette and twisting it in his hand as he let his breath escape him, the smoke floating away in the light breeze. It ruffled his hair and he was just about to fix it again when he heard voices.

"Let me get the door!"

"We won't be able to get down the stairs if we're all shoving our way down, it's narrow!"

"Luffy, lay off the meat!"

"NEVER!"

"We can't leave him out there, he's probably worrying about something pointlessly! Luffy, Usopp, go to the table—"

"But—"

"Go!"

"Aye aye m'am!"

There was the shuffling of feet, though faint through the door until Sanji turned around sharply just as the door opened to see Nami, trying to catch her breath. "Welcome, Sanji," she said, her voice coming out a little hoarse, probably from yelling.

Sanji looked over his shoulder. "Should I go?"

"You just got here," Nami insisted. "Come on, in."

"I'm not intruding, am I?" Sanji asked, still refusing to move inside.

"Yes, clearly you're a horrible party crasher, coming when you were invited!" Nami said with a laugh. "I was worried you wouldn't show."

Sanji shrugged. "Well, I mean, I considered it …" He let out another trail of smoke before his eyes widened. "Should I—?"

"No, it's fine," Nami said. "Smoke doesn't bother Luffy or me. Usopp can deal with it, it's not like any of us have asthma or anything." Nami smiled. "Now are you going to stop stalling and come in, or do we have to drag you?"

Sanji bit his lip and slowly entered the house. It looked warm and cozy inside and he felt like an intruder, no matter what Nami said. He took off his shoes and put on the slippers. Taking a deep breath, he prepared himself. For what, he didn't know, especially since he already knew everyone in the house. It just felt weird though, that Zoro wasn't around. He had last seen the marimo less than twenty-four hours ago, why was he so on edge?

The moment he entered the dinning room, he saw Luffy and Usopp sitting around the table, brown bags of take-out in front of them.

"Hey Sanji! Haven't seen you in a while!" Luffy said.

"You saw me last night, moron," Sanji reminded him.

"You're a bit late," Usopp said with a slight frown. "I think the food's cold."

"I'm fashionably late," Sanji said, though he knew Usopp was lying. He was pretty sure he was early, if anything. "So what kind of food is it?"

"We're trying Indian," said Nami, taking her seat.

"Indian?" Sanji repeated. He tried to remember if he had ever cooked Indian food before. He did like to venture into foreign foods on the occasion. He'd mastered the art of making Dumplings and Wonton soup and congee, he knew how to make Italian pasta, could make tacos (though, he was pretty sure anyone could) but he wasn't sure he had ever ventured into Indian food. Huh. That might be something he'd like to look at later.

"That okay with you?"

"Yeah," Sanji replied.

Nami handed out the food and once everyone was properly set up, she looked in Sanji's direction and said,"So, Sanji, don't you have anything to tell us?"

"Huh?"

"Remember? I asked for some stories about living with Zoro. Luffy tried it once when he first moved out of his parents' house, but it was over in less than a month. He's not exactly the easiest person to share a house with," Nami said. "How long's it been? Two months?"

"Almost three," Sanji replied. "Um, I guess I could tell you a few things …" He trailed off, unsure of what to talk to them about.

Mentioning that he had been on house arrest for nearly the entire first month was of course, something he'd never say to them. He thought about it. What was it like living with Zoro?

"Okay, uh … well, he doesn't like waking up early. I'm always up before him, usually making breakfast and then he trudges in when I'm just about finished cooking. He also has some of the worst bed hair in the world," Sanji added. It kind of look adorable to him, now that he thought about it. The way Zoro's hair stuck up in odd directions, his sweatpants looking too big on him so that they dragged along the floor and he'd stumble down the hallway. "I don't know what I'm supposed to say. He's usually out doing something or another, either at the gym or at your house," he nodded towards Nami and Luffy. "I don't know. He meditates?"

Nami shook her head. "No, tell us stories, please? Come on, can't you think of anything interesting you've done with Zoro while you've been at his place?"

Sanji could think of many things.

The midnight calls that included dragging a half-awake Zoro into the kitchen, sitting him down and "teaching" how to cook. The practicing that Zoro ran him through that was tireless and endless, adrenaline pumping and heart racing. The many games Sanji made Zoro play, a pointless, meaningless game of Random Word Association to the occasional Yes, No, Maybe games that he sprung on him pointlessly. Sanji had played almost every possibly speech game one could think of off the top of their head. Would You Rather, Truth, Twenty Questions, he had even forced Zoro to play I Spy. It had lasted perhaps two minute before Zoro screamed that Sanji was colour blind and the curtains weren't a "cerulean" colour, whatever the fuck that meant, they were blue and Sanji was overcomplicating the game. Sanji could remember forcing Zoro to watch his usual pointless anime and though Zoro would never admit it, he had probably gotten hooked on a few of them. He could remember the times he and Zoro actually had serious conversations about things like Sanji's past (as much as he was willing to speak about), Zoro's friend who's name Zoro still wouldn't dare share and he could remember the pointless time when they spoke about celebrities they thought had plastic surgery.

He said none of them.

"He fed me soup once," he said instead.

Usopp stared at him. "Soup?"

"Well, it was more like some kind of screwed up potion that's made to force you to puke," Sanji explained. "It kind of tasted like, the worst thing you can imagine, laid out in the sun to dry, left with all the dirty laundry, ran through a gym locker, was dumped in the sewers, has critters all over it, including that centipede with an extra head. The soup was like the pot of toxic waste that's the result of oil spills and other chemicals that shouldn't be allowed near humans, to the point where the wildlife in the soup have begun to mutate and develop into their own species with four heads, three sets of wings, has fifty eyes, two tails and blue skin."

Nami put down her fork and held her stomach while Usopp swallowed and seemed to be trying to hold back on gagging.

"Hey, are you going to eat that?" asked Luffy, pointing towards an uneaten piece of food on the edge of Usopp's plate.

"You can have it," Usopp said, shoving it towards Luffy. "I think I'm going to be sick."

Sanji bit his lip. "Sorry."

"It's not your fault," Nami said. "Besides, that sounds like an accurate description of the stuff Zoro would make. It's just very … detailed."

Sanji shrugged. "I think he was trying to poison me, but I suppose he's above that."

Usopp stared at him curiously. "So wait, what did you do with that soup?"

"The soup?" Sanji grinned. "I ate it."

"WHAT?!"

Sanji shrugged. "You should've seen the look on Zoro's face. He shoved the ladle at me and from the look he was wearing, I could tell if I didn't swallow, he's probably be really upset about it. I think he really tried that time around." He smiled, unable to stop himself, just imagining Zoro behind the stove, cooking up a meal for a healing Sanji. It was … almost sweet to think about it actually. He shook his head. "Anyway, right after I forced it down my throat, he was like, 'You can spit it out if you want'."

Nami laughed. "Of course that's how it goes!"

"So then I told him I couldn't and he asked me why and I told him I had swallowed and then he was just like, 'You swallowed it?' and then he went on about how I didn't actually _have_ to swallow it, but I told him that he looked like a puppy who wanted approval and he got pissed at me and then …" He trailed off.

Sanji was pretty sure Nami and her friends didn't know about the whole "kidnapping" part of Sanji staying at Zoro's.

"Anyway," he said, coughing into his hand. "Was that the only thing you needed to discuss? My ability to live with the marimo?"

Nami shook her head. "Do you know when Zoro's birthday is?"

Sanji scratched his head. "Um … well, I came to his apartment during late August, and he told me he was about three months away from his birthday—"

"Sanji, it's tomorrow."

Sanji's jaw dropped. "What?!"

"Yeah, it's Zoro birthday tomorrow," Nami said. "And I know he's still in the hospital. Apparently, they're going to let him out in two days, the day _after_ his birthday," she added, as though this were ironic. It really was though. "And we want to do something. Since you're his newest friend, he won't suspect you planning on something. He never told you when his birthday was exactly, did he?"

"No, he didn't," Sanji said slowly. "Why does that matter?"

"He probably doesn't think you know about it," Nami reasoned. "So that means you'll be our distraction."

"Pardon?"

Luffy laughed. "You know, Zoro said you did that, but I've never seen it first-hand!" Apparently, to Luffy, the word "pardon" was endlessly funny.

"Anyway, you're the only one we can use as a distraction that he won't suspect anything from," Nami explained. "Which means we want you to help us with it. We're kinda planning something for him, but we need him out of his room for the day."

"Huh?" Sanji shook his head. "Wait, I never agreed to this in the first place! Plus, his birthday? Surely he wouldn't want to spend it with me, I'm the one he knows the least, as you said, what would possibly motivate him to spend his day with me?"

Nami smirked. "I could think of a few things …" She trailed off, the look in her eyes one of pure evil. "Anyway, you won't need to do anything, I swear, just keep him out of his room."

Sanji sighed and chewed on his cigarette. "You sure?"

"Postive."

Sanji thought about it.

Zoro had taken him in, without asking for anything in return. Course, Sanji felt like he was paying him back with each meal he made, but at this point he felt as though he had paid Zoro back for over a thousand favours, since the man had lived off of take-out and his horrible cooking— Sanji actually shivered at the thought of it.

"I guess it couldn't hurt …"

Nami smiled. "Great! Now what do you think you'll get him for a present?"

"Wait, a present?" Sanji repeated. "This is kind of short notice, isn't it?" he asked. "You can't honestly expect me to get him something with what like—" Sanji checked his watch. "I have three hours till it's tomorrow. And shit, I forgot to visit Zoro!" Sanji felt like smacking himself. He had told Zoro he'd see him the next day, and yet here was Sanji, mingling with Zoro's friends instead of being with the handicapped. Not that Zoro was handicapped, but— _This train of thought is getting me nowhere!_ He shook his head. "If I'm really distracting him during the majority of the day, when would I have time to buy him anything?"

Nami shrugged. "I don't know, I figure you're smart enough to figure out something."

"But what would he want?" Sanji demanded.

The three looked at Sanji up and down.

"Maybe …" Luffy seemed to mutter under his breath, not that Sanji could understand what he was talking about.

"You know, from this angle, he doesn't look that bad," Usopp muttered. "Maybe if I were gay, I might go for him."

"You have Kaya, remember?" Nami reminded him. "And of course he's good looking!" She shook her head. "He'd have to be to—anyway, we can help you out a little, if you want," Nami said, cutting herself off and changing the topic.

Sanji shook his head. "God, I live with the guy and I don't know enough about him to get him a damn birthday present!" He sighed and lit another cigarette, twisting the remains of his old one between his fingers in thought. In the back of his mind, he was still wondering how he had forgotten about visiting Zoro.

 _It's not like he was waiting for me to turn up though. He probably forgot about what I said anyway, right? He has other family, doesn't he? Other people he'd rather be visited by, surely. I'm just thinking too much about this. It's not like I expect him to be sitting there in the bed, staring at the door, holding his breath every time it opens._

 _You want him to be though._

 _That would be selfish._

 _But you still want it._

Sanji shook his head again.

"Okay fine, let me hear it. What do you think I should get him?" Sanji asked, leaning against the wall, crossing his arms.

Nami gave him a strange look. "You can sit down," she told him, gesturing towards the couch. She cleaned up the dishes and put them on the counter, probably to clean them later while she, Usopp and Luffy moved into the living room and took seats that seemed predetermined, as though their names were on each of their spots in invisible ink.

Sanji shook his head. "I'm fine."

Nami shook her head, muttering something about "men" and crossed her legs, resting her hands on them. "Now, when did we tell you that we'd be giving you gift ideas for him?" Nami smirked. "We're going to try something okay? I want you to close your eyes."

It was in Sanji's nature to be suspicious. "Why?"

"Because I said so," Nami replied. "Don't worry, I won't move from where I am. None of us will. And if Luffy moves a muscle, we'll just duct-tape him to the couch."

"Again?" Luffy asked with a sigh.

"Again?" Sanji repeated.

"It was one time," Luffy said, holding up a finger. "Just once."

Sanji shook his head. "Never mind, whatever. Fine." He closed his eyes but he stayed on edge the entire time, as though he were over-aware of everything around him.

"Okay, I want you to think about Zoro. Say what you're thinking while you think it."

"How is that supposed to help?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow.

"It just will," Nami insisted. There was silence and then— "So?"

Sanji sighed. "You're sure this'll work?"

"Absolutely."

"Okay," Sanji said and with a shaky breath, he started.

"Zoro? He's tall. Tanned too. Green—"

There was a snicker and a hushing sound.

Sanji's eye twitched, but he kept it closed. "Um … Strong, I guess. He's stubborn as hell and determined when he wants to be. He's a lazy asshole too." He smirked. "But when he sets his mind to something, not even the apocalypse could stop him. He really likes his swords. I don't know if they originally had those names, or if he named them, but he really likes them. Especially Wado …" The longer he spoke, the more Sanji felt at ease. He could almost convince himself he was alone in the room and was just with himself. The only sound he could hear was his own voice and his heartbeat. He couldn't remember the last time he had let himself take a step back and reflect on things, especially not Zoro. "I wish he'd tell me who owned it. Her, he uses female pronouns towards it. Are all his swords female? When did he start sword fighting anyway? I bet he wasn't always good at it, but I just can't imagine Zoro being bad at it. I mean, he is bad at things, like cooking for one." He chuckled to himself softly. "And he doesn't understand anything about poetry or words for that matter. And he could probably get lost while moving in a straight line too. He's got some anger problems, a bit too prideful. Maybe a little vain? I mean, no one has a mirror that big in your room unless your at least a bit vain. I wonder what he thinks when he sees those scars on his body. Is he proud of them? They're probably from some great big fight or something, especially that one that goes across his chest …" Sanji trailed off, just remembering the image of Zoro's abdomen, the flatness of his body, the muscles … "He trains hard, obviously, you can't be that ripped without it, I guess. He's … How do you describe Zoro? Someone who's strong? But that hardly does him justice, considering all his other traits. He's thoughtful and caring, even if his methods are … peculiar. He's something indescribable, I guess. He's fierce and forceful but gentle too. He's really rough around the edges, the kind of diamond in the rough that you look for so much, you start to doubt its there but then it just is and your realize it was always there, but it's really subtle. But Zoro doesn't even know what the word subtle means … A paradox. Contradiction. Oxymoron. He's just …" Sanji shrugged, giving up on trying to define the swordsman. "He's just my marimo. Wait, did I just think—"

Sanji's eyes snapped open and he was brought back into reality. He turned his gaze up towards the ceiling, blinking a few times at the sudden light. He could feel Nami's eyes on him, as well as Luffy's, not to mention Usopp's, just staring at him. He didn't want to know what they were thinking, but he lowered his gaze when he thought he was cool enough and met their gazes.

"You're really red Sanji," said Luffy with a bright smile. "Like a tomato!"

Sanji coughed into his sleeve. "Um, right, so anyway, I think that was pointless," Sanji said. But it hadn't been. Sure, he had gone off on a tangent, no idea where his thoughts had gone and where one thought ended and another started, but he felt as though he had an idea of what Zoro would want. In fact, he knew exactly what to get him.

Grabbing his wallet, Sanji ran to the vestibule and was about to take off his slippers and call a taxi when he heard Nami say something that made him freeze in his tracks.

"…told you it was mutual."

"You bet against Nami?" came Luffy's voice.

Sanji dropped his left boot, which he had been in the middle of putting on and stood there, confused. He looked strange, no doubt, with one slipper on and a boot on his other foot.

"What's mutual?" Sanji asked, looking up the small case of stairs at the three friends.

"You're in love with Zoro!"

"WHAT?!"

"Haha, your voice just cracked!"

"It did not!"

"It did it again!"

Sanji chewed harshly on his cigarette, grinding it between his teeth. "What the fuck do you mean 'you're in love with Zoro'?!"

"Oh, I'm not," Luffy said. "You are, but not me."

"That's what I meant!" Sanji snapped.

"But you just said 'you're', as in me."

"No, I said 'you're' as in I was quoting you, which meant me!"

Luffy gave him a confused look. "Why do I feel like I've gone through this before?"

Sanji shook his head. "No, you're lying," he said. "I have no idea where the fuck you pulled that idea out of, but what the fuck do you know about love?"

Luffy scratched his head. "Yup, I've definitely had this conversation before." He slung an arm around Nami and gave Sanji a big smile. "I'm in love with Nami," he said. "So I know."

"Fuck you knowing!" Sanji snapped. "Who the fuck do you think you are, talking about love to me?" he demanded. "With your big stupid smile on your face like you didn't just tell me the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!"

Luffy frowned and tilted his head. "You haven't heard weirder?" He shrugged. "Well, stick around long enough and Usopp'll tell you something even more ridiculous!" he said with a laugh.

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT, BAKA!"

Sanji took a deep breath, trying to get himself back under control. He wondered if this was what Zoro felt all the times he seemed to blow up. It wasn't really anger, he wasn't angry at Luffy for his blatant lie, it was more like … he was confused? He was confused and frustrated and the world kept spinning and he just wanted to scream at everything to stop so he could focus again and get his bearings, but nothing was willing to give him time to cope.

"Look, you need to get your head checked," Sanji said, shoving his boot onto his foot. "I'm going go an buy Zoro his birthday present and then when I see you tomorrow, you're going to off whatever the fuck drugs you're on now and think clearly, seeing that me being in love with Zoro is absolutely impossible!"

Sanji punctuated his sentence with the loud slam of the door and called a taxi, unable to believe the audacity Luffy had, claiming he was in love with Zoro! Ha! Him! In love with that marimo?

 _Ding._

Sanji opened his phone to see he got a text from Luffy.

 _Luffy: I should rephrase what I said. You aren't in love with Zoro._

 _Thank God for seeing sense,_ Sanji thought with a smirk. _Knew that guy's hat was on a little too tight._

 _Ding._

When Sanji looked at his phone, he was ready to murder the straw hat, whether or not it was legal.

 _Luffy: You're FALLING in love with Zoro._

Sanji opened a browser on his phone and quickly searched through the maps before telling the driver he wanted to go to Ken Mise.

He didn't want to seem very giddy, but he had to contain his excitement when he got back into the taxi after purchasing his gift and telling the taxi to take him home. He remembered the look on the shop owner's face when he had come in at eleven, asking a closed shop if he could make a purchase. When he had chosen his gift, the man behind the cash had tallied it up and gave him a smile.

"You have good taste," he had told him. "For anyone in particular?"

"A friend," Sanji had replied.

"Well, they must be a special friend, if you're paying over 20 000 yen for them."

Sanji had tried not to blush and gotten back into the taxi.

He thought about it. It was nearly twelve …

Oh, what the hell.

He texted Nami, asking for the hospital's number and Zoro's room and before he could second guess himself, he was already calling.

It rang twice before someone picked up.

"Who the fuck is calling at eleven fifty-three at night?" demanded a grumpy voice. Zoro.

"Well, pardon me, Marimo," Sanji snapped, but he was smiling either way.

"Curly Brow?"

Sanji sighed. "Are my eyebrows really that screwed up?"

"More like fucked up," came Zoro's reply. "But seriously, what are you doing, calling at this time?"

Sanji was about to answer when he realized something. "You don't sound tired."

"I'm not," Zoro said. "Can't sleep. The coffee they have here sucks, but it's enough to keep me up."

"Seriously? You're injured!" Sanji snapped. "Didn't I tell you that you needed rest?"

"Worried, cook?" Zoro teased.

Sanji bit the inside of his cheek. "You already know the answer to that," he said. "Anyway, I called to apologize for not turning up today," he said.

 _What the fuck am I thinking? We've gone over this Sanji, it's not like he was waiting for you to turn up!_

"Yeah, you know, that was kind of a dick move," Zoro agreed. "I mean telling someone you'd turn up and then totally not be there? I'd think I was stood up."

"Don't make it sound like a date," Sanji told him.

Luffy's words kept ringing in his ears.

 _"You're in love with Zoro."_

"Right," said Zoro. There was silence on the other end for a moment. "Course not."

 _Does that mean anything?_ Sanji found himself wondering. He was pretty sure hearing Luffy and Nami's nonsense was slowly driving him insane. He shook his head and berated himself before taking a deep breath. "Anyway, I will be there tomorrow."

"Don't get my hopes up for nothing," said Zoro in a teasing voice, but there was something else there, the slightest trace of _something_ that Sanji dared not think about.

"Yeah well, it'd be stupid not to go," Sanji said. "I've got a surprise for you, and I can't very well give it to you if I'm not there, can I?"

Sanji's fingers trailed over the black and red. _God, I hope he likes it._

"Surprise?" Zoro repeated. "If you're a no-show, I'm really going to kick your ass," he warned him. "Don't offer gifts if you aren't planning on delivering."

"Like you could kick my ass in your condition," Sanji said with a smirk.

"It's your stop," said the driver.

Sanji got out of the car, gave him his money and put Zoro's gift under his arm. He opened the door to the apartment, with the phone pressed against his ear between his ear and his shoulder. "So, what's the hospital like?"

"Why the fuck are you out so late?" demanded Zoro. "It's eleven fifty-eight at night!"

"As you've mentioned before," Sanji said with a smile. He dropped his wallet on the kitchen table and sat down on the couch, placing the gift on the coffee table. He yawned. "Worried about me?"

There was silence. Then—

"Maybe."

Sanji's eyes widened in surprise. That wasn't like Zoro, to admit to something like that, if it was even true. He felt his chest warm with something he couldn't identify and instead let himself sprawl out across the couch. "Oh yeah?" he pressed teasingly.

"Sleepy?"

"No." Sanji couldn't hold back another yawn, his eyes drifting close.

"You sure?"

"Okay, maybe a little," he conceded.

"Baka."

The way Zoro spoke, it was so gentle, in such a different tone than anything Sanji had ever heard the swordsman say. Though it was an insult, it sounded … _affectionate_?

He curled his legs into himself, vowing to get up once he was finished talking with Zoro. He figured the conversation would be over soon anyway. "Ahou," Sanji said back in a soft voice.

"You should get some sleep."

"So should you."

"I have an excuse, coffee, remember?"

Sanji sighed, his eyes feeling heavy as he tried to keep them open. "If the coffee's shit, don't drink it."

"I needed to try to counteract the anaesthetics," Zoro replied. "I couldn't be a slug, could I?"

"Aren't you normally a slug?" Sanji said, a smirk settling on his lips.

"You're tired, so I won't say anything," Zoro said, yawning himself.

"You going to sleep yet, Marimo?"

"Not yet," said Zoro. "You know, the place still smells of nicotine," he added absentmindedly.

"Really?"

"Yup. That's strong stuff. Just watch, you'll be the next one in this bed," Zoro told him teasingly.

"Hey Zoro?" asked Sanji, feeling reality slowly slip around him.

"Hmm?"

"Have you ever been n love?"

There was silence.

"No," Zoro replied after a while. "But …" He seemed to be thinking a little, or probably, as much as his foggy brain could. Sanji knew his thoughts were getting jumbled and mixed around himself. "I think I might be soon …"

"That's nice," Sanji said with another yawn. He stared at the sheath on the coffee table. "I think I might too."

"Oh yeah?" Zoro's voice sounded slightly far-away, like he was lost in thought, or something. _Idiot Marimo, getting lost in his own mind. "_ With who?"

"Not telling," Sanji teased. He yawned once more. "I think I'm going to go to bed."

"Okay." Was it just him or did Zoro sound disappointed? Must be the sleep doing something to his ears.

"Oh and Zoro?" said Sanji, using the last of his strength to speak.

"Yeah?"

"When you get out, I'll make you the best fucking coffee you've ever had."

"It's a deal."

With that, Sanji slipped into slumber, the last thought he had being,

 _Maybe Luffy's right. Just a little. Zoro's got a fucking sexy voice, after all._

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay, the thank-yous now!_

 _Eager Reader: I feel as though Sanji and Zoro are both not stuck-up enough to be Darcy. I mean, first of all, the fact that Darcy scorned Elizabeth at the ball, consider how much Sanji values women. Uh, no way in hell would he do that. And in the show, Zoro kinda comes off as asexual to me, which means he probably wouldn't care about the dance sure, and maybe he'd stand around talking nonsense about others, but he probably wouldn't insult their appearance. That's just my opinion._

 _Nessiebaby: Define the word "literature". Because if it means reading, hell yes, I love it. I swear, I'm the only child who got punished by being banned from reading, BECAUSE I was reading. More traumatizing things? Well, I already saw a demotivational poster about Sanji being an okama (omaka? I'm not sure, I'm too lazy to check) and so I'm already traumatized. Actually, learning how much 4Kids censor things traumatized me as well and I went crazy, thinking, "Have I been watching any of their dubs? DID THEY RUIN AN ANIME I LOVE?!" I used to only watch dubs cause I like to multitask and not always watch, so that way I know what everyone's saying, but after watching some bad dubs I'm like, nah, I'll watch some subs. If it's a long series and I think the dub is good, I'll watch the dub, but for the past like, 5 months, I've been sticking to subs. **Bleach** I find though doesn't have a bad dub. **One Piece'** s dub ... I think in the sub and the dub Luffy's voice sounds just a tad strange, but I like Zoro and Sanji's voices in both dub and sub, but since I want to hear Sanji call Zoro "marimo", I'll watch it subbed. _

_JustCallMeLucie: I just felt like thinking that when Zoro's in trouble, Sanji would do something really out of character, but if you knew the circumstances, then it would make sense so I chose him swearing at Nami. Besides, I really had fun with that hospital scene so Zoro going to get himself hurt, it's helping their relationship ironically._

 _S.P. Tripathi: I've read some Jane Austen, and I think she deserves the praise the critics give her. She really **is** amazing. But anyway, I hope you liked this chapter!_

 _Dyloa : I'm thinking of writing about Sanji or Zoro asking Usopp for love advice, since so many people think either Luffy or Usopp would be good, but since I have a really good grasp on Luffy and Nami, more than Usopp, I'll have to wait and see. I would like to give it a shot, when I'm not busy with this story. Once I get this story steady and all, I would definitely like to try translating! I just figure I know French, find it's not impressive to know it since in Quebec, just about EVERYONE is bilingual, so I might as well show off somewhere, right? I think this chapter's ending is even more adorable, and I loved thinking about what Zoro was thinking on the other end of the line. I might write a oneshot of that conversation on Zoro's end._

 _vivi2260 : You don't? Are you sure? Cause otherwise, I'll have to wonder what I yell at my friends on the occasion._

 _lilcutieprincess : Well, I've updated!_

 _Reina : Thanks for your input, really. Since the story's so far along, I don't think I'll be changing it like that, but I will keep your comments in mind. I'll try to figure out how to express Sanji's reason for not leaving in a subtle way (I'm not the greatest at subtlety) and when I do revisions, I'll probably add stuff here and there. I don't think any story's perfect, but you work at it until you think you can't possibly improve it anymore. That's why I've rewritten my own original story about 5 times and I'm still not completely satisfied. I can also understand though why some people wouldn't take well to those kinds of reviews, but I do appreciate that you took the time to mention these things and explain them to me!_

 _Okay the answer to the last question: the first phrase of the last chapter was a parody of Jane Austen's **Pride & Prejudice**, published in 1813, (I didn't actually ask for the exact date published, did I? But thanks for telling me anyway!) and I just remember one time, when I read the book (as an eBook for the first time), it said published in 1813 and I was like, "OH MY GOD, THIS BOOK'S 200 YEARS OLD!" cause it was 2013 when I read it again. Still love that book! But moving onwards ..._

 _First question, with background info, because, of course I'll do this. Zoro's birthday is November 11th (Remembrance Day) and Sanji's birthday is March 2nd. This is a fact, I tried to keep as many things canon as I can, even if the story IS AU. **They're both the same age, but either Sanji's eight months older than Zoro, or Zoro's four months older than Sanji. Who do you think is older?** (I can give you no definite answer, but I'll ask this question anyway cause I changed numbers around because of this cause I had no idea what to do about Zoro's age.)_

 ** _BONUS QUESTION: If you were to give Zoro a birthday present, what would it be?_**

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	19. A Birthday In The Hospital

_**Author's Note:** Okay so I was really lenient on how hospitals worked. And yes, there's quite a bit of French in here in comparison to other chapters. I also think that Sanji's above the whole rating thing, but it was really fun to do anyway. I don't own **One Piece** or **Fifty Shades of Grey** (thankfully. That's about the **Shades** , not the treasure). What else? I did look up different shades of grey for this, " **Fifty Shades of Pornography** " is what my friends call it and I do think Sanji's just a bit out of character here, but I really liked this chapter._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 19: A Birthday In The Hospital

* * *

There was something special about today.

Zoro couldn't quite place his finger on it, but it was something he was probably supposed to remember, but couldn't for some reason.

As he was contemplating what he had forgotten, he heard the door open and sat up in bed.

"Morning, Marimo," greeted Sanji. He entered the room and stuck his hands in his pockets, leaning against a wall, the cigarette as usual, resting in the corner of his mouth. Zoro had to tear his eyes away from Sanji's to remind himself it was weird to stare at another man's lips.

"Didn't think you'd be coming," Zoro told him in a teasing voice. To be honest though, after Sanji had forgotten about him yesterday, he wasn't the most believing in the cook's punctuality.

"What and stand you up?" Sanji asked with a smirk. "Wouldn't dream of it, darling," he teased.

Zoro decided not to mention that's exactly what Sanji had done the day before. Instead, he tried to fight down a blush and gripped his sheets tighter. "Don't make it sound like its a date."

"You're the one who said it last night," Sanji reminded him. "I think." He shook his head. "I don't know, the last few minutes I was awake are pretty fuzzy." He shrugged. "Doesn't matter. Anyway, why don't we take a walk?"

"A walk?" Zoro repeated disbelievingly.

"What? You haven't broken your legs since the last time I saw you, did you?" Sanji asked.

"No, but—"

"Then we're walking," Sanji said. "What, do I need to sign you out or something to leave this room like you're some member of an asylum or something?" He rolled his eyes. "Get up Marimo, we're going to go exploring."

"I'm not a child," Zoro told him, but he complied. He pulled his blankets off of himself and used his hand as leverage to push off the bed. All of this was done unsteadily by his right hand. "Fuck, I hate being injured," he muttered.

"Yes, I suppose it isn't all sunshine and roses, is it?" Sanji asked him and Zoro suddenly felt incredibly bad.

Sanji had probably been through hell— no, he _had_ gone through hell, with countless bruises, scars and burns to prove it and here was Zoro being all insensitive thinking that just cause he had a slightly damaged arm, he had the rottenest luck in the world. "Sanji, I—"

"It's fine," Sanji told him, waving him off. "Anyway, let's get going," he insisted.

Zoro grumbled as he walked over to Sanji and glared at his cigarette. "Do you care about people's health at all?"

"Besides my own?" Sanji asked with a smirk. "No, not really. Well, on the occasion I'll worry about nimrod marimos, but you don't meet them every day you know." He winked at him and Zoro felt his cheeks light up. The room was hot. It was very hot. And he was _not_ blushing because Zoro Roronoa does not blush. Nope. Never.

"Where's my surprise?" Zoro asked.

"Surprise?" Sanji repeated.

"I believe you mentioned one last night," Zoro reminded him. "Where is it?"

"Oh, that," Sanji said. "Um, you'll have to wait for it."

Zoro did not pout because Zoro Roronoa was above pouting. Pouting was for babies and puppies and whiny people who were desperate for something. It didn't even look all that attractive to pout. And yet Sanji laughed at him and claimed he was pouting. Honestly, what the fuck was the delusional cook thinking?

"Come on, I want to see this place," Sanji said. "I didn't get to look around much last time I was here."

Zoro rubbed his neck with his good arm. It still felt weird doing it. "Yeah well, there's isn't much to see around here,

"I'll be the judge of that," Sanji told him. "Now get your lazy ass moving."

Zoro grumbled the entire time as they entered the hallway and a nurse gave him a small smile. "You going to leave your room today, Mr. Roronoa?"

Zoro gritted his teeth. He knew the nurse meant well but he was sick and tired of being treated like a wounded animal around the hospital. Sure, he was injured, he could admit to that, but that didn't mean he couldn't eat on his own (with some difficulty). He could still walk, could still talk and he was breathing, wasn't he? He gave her a curt nod and grasped Sanji's shoulder with his good arm. "Come on, let's go," he said. "Where are we headed?"

"You're the one steering me," Sanji said, eyeing Zoro's hand on his shoulder.

Zoro let go of him almost instantly. "Yeah well … you don't know where you're going."

"It's a hospital with signs everywhere, even you couldn't get lost," Sanji told him, rolling his eyes. "Come on, let's go to the cafeteria. It's nine, you aren't hungry?"

Zoro wanted to cross his arms, but he couldn't with the annoying cast on his arm. "They have shit food here too," he said. "It's not just the coffee."

"I'll be the judge of that," Sanji said.

They entered the elevator and Sanji hit a button. The doors closed.

"If you don't know where you're going, how do you know that's where the cafeteria is?" asked Zoro.

"I don't," Sanji said. "But we have time, so I figure it isn't the worst thing if we get a little lost." He eyed Zoro's cast and smirked. "Making a fashion statement?"

"Shut up," Zoro snapped through gritted teeth but he couldn't hold back the urge to smile. He made an attempt to twist it into a scowl, but instead he ended up looking like he was having a seizure or something.

"Aren't people supposed to sign a cast?" asked Sanji.

"I don't fucking know," Zoro said, "does it really matter?"

"You're breaking tradition if you don't have at least someone sign it, besides if that room has anyone white in it, it'll be a marshmallow," Sanji added.

"If it's such a big deal to you, then sign it yourself," Zoro told him in a gruff voice.

"Maybe I will."

"Whatever."

 _Ding._

The doors opened and a couple rolled in. The girl was in a wheelchair, her foot propped up in front of her. Zoro knew they were a couple just from the aura they seemed to leak as they took a position near the corner of the elevator. Zoro felt incredibly uncomfortable in their presence, perhaps because they were giving each other stupid kiss-y faces. He kind of wanted to puke. PDA wasn't the worst thing he had ever experienced, but he still didn't feel comfortable in a confined area where it seemed likely those two were going to stick their tongues into each others throat without any way to escape.

And of course, that's exactly what they proceeded to do. Zoro turned his gaze toward the ceiling, feeling more than a little uncomfortable. Luffy and Nami were fine, they just gave each other quick pecks before they left the house or every now and then they did make-out, but that only lasted five seconds until Zoro cleared his throat, feeling awkward and they'd stop. This couple … how did you tell strangers that they're desire to pull each others' clothes off was a bit disturbing? Well, he supposed anyone would find it disturbing, but then again, people didn't have a problem with watching strangers fuck, that's what porn was after all.

He counted down from ten in his head, tapped his foot against the floor, hummed a ridiculously loud rock song underneath his breath to avoid hearing the slobbering sounds the couple seemed to have amplified the more Zoro tried to drown them out.

He let his eyes wander elsewhere in the elevator to Sanji and realized something.

Sanji was watching them.

It wasn't even in the subtle way, it was plain staring and it almost looked like he was analyzing it, like he was watching it and committing it to memory, like this was one of those things they taught you in school that was going to be useful later on in life, and you actually realized and took your head off the desk and stopped sleeping to listen.

 _Ding._

The doors opened again and the couple got out. It felt like it had been forever, but really, it had been maybe ten seconds? They had three more floors to go.

Zoro cleared his throat awkwardly and fought down the blush on his cheeks. "You should've taken a picture," he told Sanji. "Would've lasted longer."

Sanji turned to him. "Jealous?"

"Of what?" Zoro demanded. He eyed Sanji's cigarette and frowned. "Smoking in a confined space like this—"

"You're red, Marimo," Sanji told him with a smirk.

"I am not!"

"And you're in denial," Sanji added, looking even more amused then before.

"Perverted voyeur," Zoro snapped.

"Better than a prude blusher."

"Is that even a word?"

"I said it, so it must be."

Zoro stared at him, as though by analyzing the cook, he could find out whether or not his statement held any truth.

That's when the doors opened again.

"Our stop, Marimo," Sanji told him. Guiding him by his shoulder, he pulled Zoro out of the elevator.

The doors closed behind them and Sanji looked around. He checked his watch as though this were going to tell him the truth of the universe and frowned. "It's only been fifteen minutes?" he muttered under his breath.

"Tired of me already?" Zoro teased, but holding his breath for Sanji's answer.

Sanji didn't answer him and instead, walked past him down a hall. He stopped when he was half-way down the hall. Not turning to face him, Zoro could see the wisp of smoke that came from Sanji's cigarette, even from the distance he was at. "You coming?" he asked him in a bored tone.

Zoro cursed the blond under his breath until the cook stopped abruptly, causing Zoro to bump into his back.

"Fuck, give me a warning, would you?" Zoro demanded. "Do you want me to be hospitalized any longer?"

"It's your fault in the first place," Sanji snapped.

 _No, it's your fault, you damn cook. You and your stupid self getting stuck in my head. Apparently, the only way you to shake you out of my thoughts is to nearly die. Course, you don't feel guilty, do you?_ But he didn't speak and instead, rolled his eyes and stayed silent.

It was then that the smell of food reached his nose. Actually, it didn't really seem like food. Zoro had to eat the hospital's food the night before and it had been less than satisfactory. It reminded him of the play food that others played with. It looked real and edible but the second you bit into it, you discovered it was made of plastic and left a horrible taste in your mouth, sending you to the hospital for choking on a fake grape. Funny, the food here was no better.

"Don't make me go in there," Zoro said in a voice that was not a plea because Zoro Roronoa didn't plea. Not even if you begged him to.

"Come on Marimo, you need to eat," Sanji told him, grabbing his good arm and pulling him.

Zoro dug his feet into the ground, hoping they'd keep him routed in the spot, but it was all in vain. As his feet skid across the floor, he wondered who he'd leave his stuff to. He had nearly died drinking their coffee and he highly doubted he'd make it through a full meal. "I don't have to eat," Zoro said, "I'm not hungry."

And then his stomach growled. Loudly.

Sanji gave him a knowing look. "Of course you're fine." He then continued to drag Zoro with him.

 _Damn stomach, fucking traitor!_

As the cafeteria came even closer, Zoro got desperate. "Please, don't take me in there!" Zoro Roronoa did not— fuck it, fine, he begged but that cafeteria was fucking _scary_ as hell!

"Honestly, how did you get through high school?" Sanji asked with a sigh. "If you can't enter the cafeteria—"

"When I was in high school, I had never tried your cooking," Zoro pointed out.

Sanji's grip on his arm loosened slightly. He looked at Zoro strangely. "What's that supposed to mean?" It wasn't an insult, it sounded … curious.

 _I am not inflating his ego,_ Zoro decided.

"It means your cooking's heavenly and anything else tastes like fucking garbage."

 _Fuck._

And then Zoro's brain came up with an ingenious plan.

He ran.

* * *

When he had made the third left turn, he realized he was completely and utterly lost.

 _Well fuck._

This wasn't possible. Sanji had said it himself. There were tons of signs everywhere, it wasn't that hard to find a sign and read it. He'd figure out where he was.

 _Okay, think. You got on an elevator, which went from the first floor to the … fifth? Am I on the fifth floor? Why the fuck does this hospital have so many floors?_

Oh! He knew what he had to do! He just had to find the nearest elevator and the number of the floor would surely be written on the wall somewhere near there. Right, okay. Now where was the nearest elevator?

The problem with being lost, is that in order to get un-lost, you needed to find your starting point, or at least, have some other place you wanted to get to in order to fix yourself and get your bearings. In order to do that, you had to have a reasonably good sense of direction. In order to do that, you had to _not_ be Zoro Roronoa.

It was at that moment a girl and a boy rolled by. The girl was in a wheelchair, her foot propped up— _Oh great, just fucking, it's the tonsil hockey players._

Zoro glared at them as they passed, talking to each other. It was at that moment that he realized something. He didn't need to have a good sense of direction, he just needed someone else to have it.

"Hey," Zoro said, raising his voice to the couple. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

The girl and boy looked at him strangely, obviously having no idea why he was talking to them. "I don't bite," he added, just for good measure. "I'm just a bit uh …" He rubbed his neck with his good hand. Fuck this was embarrassing. "Just a bit lost," he admitted.

The girl looked at him blankly for a moment before looking up and whispering to her boyfriend. He nodded and laughed a little.

" _On ne parle pas japonais_ ," he said.

Oh thank God, they spoke a language he knew!

" _Je m'excuse, je ne veux pas vous-déranger, sauf c'est seulement que je suis in peu perdu. Es-ce que vous purriez m'aidé?_ "

The man stared at him and blinked. He seemed a bit shocked that Zoro spoke French. " _Où est l'autre homme qui était avec vous?_ "

" _Je sais pas,_ " Zoro replied. " _Savez-vous comment aller au l'aire de restauration?_ "

The two of them helped give him directions. He thanked them gratefully and headed on his way, but not before he heard the girl giggle something to her boyfriend.

" _Son copain et lui sont vraiment mignon, n'est ce pas?_ "

Zoro tried not to act as though that affected him at all. Nope, it did nothing. But how the fuck did they come up with that conclusion?

Using their directions, he was almost at the cafeteria when he heard something over the loud speaker.

"We have received a recent complaint from someone who shall remain anonymous, complaining about a tall blond man screaming about some type of green algae. The witness says the man is alternating between strong cuss words and the name 'Zoro'. If Zoro would please make his way to the cafeteria and if the man could please stop disturbing the others, it'd be much appreciated. Also, could the man please stop smoking? This is a hospital after all. Thank you."

Zoro was going to fucking kill him.

When he got into the cafeteria he found Sanji sitting at a table with a tray full of food and a cup of coffee in the corner of his tray.

Zoro slammed his good hand down on the table and glared at him. "Was the loud speaker really necessary?" he demanded.

Sanji looked up as though he only just realized he had gotten there. "Hello Zoro, how are you? I'm fine Sanji, how are you? Well, hard to say considering I just caused the beauties of the hospital to complain due to you. Do you need a map of the hospital?"

"No, you are not allowed to get into a one-sided conversation with yourself. What, did you think screaming my name would make me come?"

Sanji stared at him. He turned his head to the side and the beginning of a blush.

Zoro blinked. Then—

"Pervert!"

The entire cafeteria seemed to turn to him and hush him. It seemed no matter where Zoro went, he gathered unwanted attention. He took a seat and tried to fold his arms for the thousandth time that day, only to find his arms wouldn't cross. Fuck, he hated being handicapped.

There was silence while Zoro silently fumed until Sanji spoke.

"This coffee really is shit."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "I told you it was awful, why'd you drink it?"

"I figured you were just being bitchy," Sanji said with a shrug. He stirred the coffee with a spoon and Zoro noticed it was completely black. "So …" Sanji seemed to be considering what he was going to say, before he spoke again. "Did you mean it?"

"What, that you're a pervert?" Zoro asked.

"No, the thing about my cooking," Sanji said.

Zoro stared at him. There was no way Sanji didn't know how amazing his food was. Every time Luffy visited, he insisted on eating everything Sanji made, whether or not it was prepared for him and then there was the fact that Zoro had been in pure heavenly bliss the first time he had tried Sanji's food, which resulted in a rather embarrassing moan in the middle of a crowded restaurant. He kind of felt like it was one of those things that only happened in movies, orgasmic cries of pleasure, that was.

Zoro wanted to stuff his mouth with food to avoid telling him, but he knew trying anything on Sanji's tray would be like trying to eat rubber. "Just a little," Zoro mumbled under his breath.

Sanji seemed to mull this over in his head for a while before he smirked. "Let's play a game."

"Oi, you and your games, it's ridiculous," Zoro said, shaking his head. "Haven't you taught me them all?"

"I've got a few more up my sleeve," Sanji told him.

"Shouldn't I be getting back to my room?" Zoro pointed out.

"You just found me again," Sanji said, "let's stay a while. Besides, we can hardly play this game in your room."

"Oh yeah?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow. "Dare I ask?"

"Have you ever rated anyone?"

Zoro had no idea what Sanji meant but from the evil grin on his face, he got the feeling this was something that Sanji found great joy in doing. "What?"

Sanji pointed towards the woman behind the cash register. She was tall, a bit chubby and wore a hairnet that seemed just a little too tight. Her uniform seemed to barely fit her. "One's the lowest, ten's the highest. I give her a six."

"What, not a ten?" Zoro teased. "The great lady's man is being picky, isn't he?"

"Look, I've got my reasons. At the current moment, she seems to be a six. I mean, she has really nice hair, probably if it wasn't up in that hairnet and she's wearing a bit too much make-up for my taste. Her nails are well done though and she has really pretty eyes. Her shoes are nice and if her uniform actually fit her, she wouldn't look all that bad. Her potential's there, she just isn't trying."

Zoro peered at him strangely. "You don't consider this degrading towards women?"

Sanji shrugged. "Not really, I'm appreciating beauty and stating my opinion. If you were to play with the other cooks though …" Sanji shivered for a reason that Zoro was sure was more than just how crude they'd be. "Besides, I can appreciate a man's attractiveness as much as a woman's."

 _Oh yeah?_ Zoro wondered. _Does that mean— no, he's straight._

Zoro found it weird that when a girl stated how nice another girl looked, it was fine, but when it came to a guy thinking another guy looked great in a shirt that brought out his eyes, they were considered gay. It was kind of strange to him.

"Fine," Zoro conceded. "What about … her?"

He pointed towards a girl who was getting coffee from the shit coffee machine. She was wearing jeans that hugged her legs perfectly, stilettos and a crop top. Her nails looked well-manicured from what Zoro could see and she had a belly-button piercing to top it all off. Her hair was nice and long, falling past her elbows in a wave down her back. She was probably some patient's daughter, getting him a drink or something.

Sanji looked at her for a moment. "Five."

"Five?" Zoro echoed.

"Yeah," Sanji replied. "First of all, look at how much skin she's showing."

"I thought you'd appreciate it."

Sanji shook his head. "No, best to leave it up to the imagination. She's not steady in those shoes, see how she's walking with the cup in both hands? You don't normally do that, do you? She's probably trying to even the weight on either side of her. She looks anorexic Zoro," Sanji said. "She looks fake."

"Fake?" Zoro repeated.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Can you look at her cleavage and tell me honestly that it's real?"

"Her c-cleavage?" Zoro repeated. He shook his head. "I'm not looking there!"

"So innocent," Sanji muttered with a smirk. "Anyway, I'm sure she's beautiful, but she's trying too hard. Imagine her without her without the make-up and pretend her breast size is maybe, half the size it is now. And cover her stomach."

Zoro tried to do it. He frowned. "She … looks entirely different in my mind."

"Is she pretty?" Sanji asked him.

"Yes," Zoro admitted.

"Okay, your turn," Sanji said. He pointed towards a man sitting a few tables away.

The man was average height with a small goatee and dark hair slicked back. He wore sunglasses (he was one of _those_ people, the ones who wore glasses inside) and a simple polo shirt with a pair of black pants.

"A man?"

"Why not?"

Zoro bit his lip and stared at the man. He had never spent much time looking at others, he was too busy focusing on training and the like. Whenever he met someone, normally his first thought was about tier personality, which he based off of their look. Sanji's actual personality was partially surprising while at the same time predictable to him. It was a pleasant surprise. "He's …" He thought about it. He wondered if Sanji ever put this much thought into the number he gave others. "Four."

"Tough crowd," Sanji said. "Why so low?"

"He's a douche," Zoro said. "Wearing glasses inside, his hair slicked back looks greasy, plus his goatee looks stupid."

"What if he's blind?" Sanji asked.

"Huh?"

"This is a hospital, you know sometimes blind people wear sunglasses indoors," Sanji pointed out.

"Yeah well …" Zoro felt bad, but he wasn't going to tell Sanji that.

"I'd give him a seven," Sanji said. "His polo's well-pressed and he looks like a business man. He's sophisticated. He's a tad mysterious with the glasses. I bet he's a lawyer—"

"Have you ever seen a lawyer who wasn't wearing a suit?"

Sanji thought about it. "I did once. One of the customers was one." He shrugged. "Either way, from the angle I'm looking at him from, his hair looks really cool. Besides, that goatee's kinda hot."

Zoro stared at him. Did Sanji realize what he had just said?

"Okay, next person," the blond said, pointing towards their next victim.

It went on like this for quite some time until after almost two hours of playing Sanji decided to change games.

"I'm going to give you a category," Sanji declared. "And then, we have to name things under that category. We can't repeat anything and we have … say five seconds to answer."

"What?" Zoro demanded. He thought they were going to rate the pregnant woman who was yelling at her husband, but apparently his six would have to wait for another time.

"Okay, then. The category's colours. Black."

"Blue— wait!" Zoro stopped himself and glared at Sanji. "Black's not a colour!"

"It is to me. Red."

"Yellow. It isn't one, it's a fucking shade."

"Green. Not according to me."

"Orange. Well according to practically the whole universe, it is!"

"Purple. Well the whole universe can go fuck itself, I still think it's a colour."

"White. The whole universe doesn't give a fuck what you think."

"Brown. White's not a colour, Marimo."

"Pink. If black's a colour, so is white."

"Violet. White is what you end up with when there's a complete absence of colour, isn't it?"

"Grey. Isn't that what black is?"

"Magenta. Fine, whatever, white's a colour, but only if black's a colour."

"Turquoise. What the fuck is magenta? And black will never be a colour."

"Lilac. Of course black's a colour, it's my favourite one, remember? And you've heard of turquoise but not magenta?"

"Gainsboro. I think you're just pulling things out of your ass right now."

"Emerald. What the fuck is gainsboro? You're the one pulling things out of their ass!"

"Light grey. It's a shade of grey."

"Scarlet. Fuck, don't tell me we're going through forty-seven more shades, are we?"

"Spanish gray. And why the fuck not?"

"Aquamarine and seriously? Is that even a real shade?"

"Gunmetal and yes, it is a real shade."

"Vermillion. Great, next you're going to bring in the handcuffs and a riding crop."

"WHAT?!"

Sanji smirked. "I win."

Zoro blinked. He was still stuck on the handcuffs and riding crop. "What the fuck is that about?" he demanded.

" _Fifty Shades of Pornography,_ better known as _Fifty Shades of Grey_ ," Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "Anyway, moving on. I won, you choose the next category."

"The only reason you won is because you started talking about perverted things!" Zoro shivered. "God, have you no shame?"

"Not really. Pick a category Marimo," Sanji told him.

Zoro tried to stop his head from spinning. He decided to push Sanji's inner-pervert to the back of his mind since now didn't seem like the time to worry about it. "Swords," he said.

Sanji's face drained of colour. The cook was naturally pale but now he looked even paler. Zoro smirked. "I start?"

"Um, yeah," Sanji said, gulping.

It was fun to watch Sanji squirm. "Wado."

 _One. Two. Three. Fo—_

"Katana."

Zoro decided to let it pass. "Sandai."

 _One. Two. Three. Four. Fi—_

"Fuck!"

Zoro smirked. "I win."

Sanji glared at him and Zoro met him, their category game being a stare-down.

The more Zoro stared at the blond's eye, the more he realized it wasn't just blue, there was the lightest hint of grey in his iris as well. It was … very interesting. Seeing the ocean blue mixed with the lightest trace of a storm cloud. He leaned a bit closer, wanting to put his hands on the table to get a better look, see what other colours Sanji was hiding in those eyes of his, when he heard the sound of the loud speaker.

"Um, we've received another complaint from a patient about a redheaded woman who's in his room, currently, screaming at him for hiding someone. She's accompanied by a few other people, there's a limited number of people allowed in a hospital bedroom at a time, remember that. Would the— pardon my language— 'shitty swordsman' come back to the room so that the patient may sleep?"

Sanji's eyes widened suddenly. "Fuck, I totally forgot!" He checked his phone and groaned. "She's going to kill me. Get up Marimo, we're going back to your room," he told him.

Dragging him into the elevator, he pressed the first floor button and the doors closed.

They stood in silence for a while, the awful elevator music making Zoro sick until he spoke. "What'd you forget?"

"None of your business, Marimo," Sanji snapped at him.

That was all they said before the doors opened again and Sanji dragged him to his room.

There was a nurse standing outside the door, frowning. "The room's reached its maximum number of people allowed in at at time—"

"He's a patient," Sanji said, gesturing towards Zoro. "See? His arm's broken."

"That may be so, but—"

"Look, I'm sorry Miss, but we kind of need to get inside there," Sanji told her. He gave her an innocent smile. "You understand, don't you? This man needs his rest and he's unable to get it in this noisy hallway."

Zoro decided not to mention that there was no one else in the hallway but them.

"Well uh …"

"Thank you, sweetheart," Sanji said, moving behind her and opening the door.

"It's against regulations to smoke inside this building," said the nurse, spluttering a little. Zoro tried to glance into the room, but it looked fairly dark. He wondered how the man in the bed next to his managed to phone anyone to complain considering the darkness. "It's prohibited."

Sanji turned to her. "You can make an exception, can't you?" he asked her, his voice sounding silky and soft.

The woman seemed to shiver and nod profusely. "Of course sir!"

Sanji flashed her a smile before roughly pulling Zoro into the room.

"SURPRISE!"

The light switch turned up and Nami, Usopp, Ace and Luffy all surrounded Zoro's empty bed, a cake on the bedside table.

"What's going on?" asked Zoro, completely confused.

"Don't tell me he actually forgot," said Nami.

Sanji smirked. "Happy birthday, Marimo."

Birthday? It was … oh fuck, that was what he was supposed to remember, wasn't it?

"Oh …"

Luffy frowned. "Can we eat the cake now?"

Zoro stared at the cake with the blue icing on it, written in fancy script was: _Happy Birthday Zoro!_ He frowned. "This isn't from the cafeteria, is it?"

"Sanji made it," Luffy said. "Can I eat it now?"

"You made it?" Zoro asked, turning to the blond.

Sanji turned his head away, his hands shoved in his pockets. "Yeah well …" He shrugged. "Are you gonna eat it before it gets cold?"

"It's a cake," Zoro pointed out.

"We've been waiting forever," Nami said. "Sanji had to keep you out of the room for like, I dunno, two hours and instead he kept you for like, four! He didn't answer any of his messages either!"

"I'm in a hospital," Sanji said. "It'd be rude to have my phone on. And I didn't hold him up for four hours, it was more like three and a half. The idiot got lost."

Usopp sighed and shook his head. "Seriously?"

Zoro turned to Sanji. "So, wait, is this the surprise you were talking about?"

Sanji shook his head.

"But it's a party and you made a cake— what's this?"

Sanji had thrust a package into Zoro's hands, a wrapped gift with a small note on it, saying:

 _To: Marimo_

 _From: Curly Brow_

Obviously great care had been gone through to wrap it. And of course Zoro just ripped it open without a single care in the world.

The entire room held its breath.

"That's what you got him?" asked Usopp in shock.

"That's …" Nami didn't seem to be able to finish her sentence. "That's …"

Luffy just kept eating while Ace grinned.

In Zoro's hands was a red and black sheath, and from the weight of it, there was a sword in there. Slowly, using his right hand, he unsteadily pulled the blade out of its cover and stared at it. The blade was a pure black, shiny and it looked sharp. It was … God, this was amazing! He couldn't even find words to describe it.

Zoro couldn't speak, his voice wouldn't work.

"I wasn't sure if you'd like it," Sanji said slowly, taking Zoro's speechlessness as a potentially bad sign. "See, I don't know, I saw it there and it looked pretty and it sounded like it had an awesome name, Shusui and all, and I thought maybe you could use another sword?" He chewed on his cigarette. "Never mind, it was stupid—"

Sanji was cut off by Zoro wrapping his arms around him tightly, hugging him tightly.

Zoro wasn't sure if he was crying, but he wouldn't be surprised if he was and at that moment, he didn't care if he was.

"Thank you," he said, "thank you so much!"

Sanji rolled his eyes but returned the hug, wrapping his arms around Zoro as well. "Your welcome."

Ace whistled and the two broke apart, Zoro suddenly feeling embarrassed, Sanji turning his head away.

"How are we supposed to top that?" demanded Luffy.

Zoro smirked. "I'd like to see you try." He looked over at Sanji again.

The party continued and though Luffy had already started to eat the cake, they lit up the candles and Zoro stared at the candles. He didn't know what to wish for. He had a new sword that Sanji had gotten him, he had amazing friends and the only thing he could want was for his arm to heal, and that probably wouldn't take too long, therefore not being worth wasting his wish on.

As he stared at the flickering flames of the candles, he glanced at the cook out of the corner of his eye.

" _Son copain et lui sont vraiment mignon, n'est ce pas?_ "

He knew exactly what to wish for.

Everyone clapped and cheered when he blew them out.

"So, what'd you wish for?" asked Nami.

"If I say it, it won't come true," Zoro told her teasingly, but he knew even if he told her, it still wouldn't come true.

Zoro's wish had been this: I wish Sanji was _"mon copain"._

But that was impossible, wasn't it?

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay the thank-yous!_

 _Eager Reader: Okay, you're totally right! I don't know what else to say about that. I suppose that makes sense there are communication problems but I do like writing these kinds of relationships, they're just fun for me and hopefully amusing for others._

 _Raigon : The thing was I didn't want them doing that stupid "You hang up first" thing, cause I just find that annoying, but anyway, yeah, I liked it and when I read it over I ended up yawning myself, especially when I read it before bed and then I was reading it aloud to test that it made sense and I ended up yawning just when Sanji was yawning._

 _JustCallMeLucie : A compass? Would it work? I'm just thinking of the compass in **Deadman's Chest,** that doesn't point north, but at what you desire most. Oh, **Disney** pirates and **One Piece** pirates, the fun!_

 _lilcutieprincess : Thanks, I'm glad you liked it and I hope you liked this chapter! Make him something? What do you think he'd like to eat?_

 _Dyloa : So right after reading your review I was like, "I should really read **Bridget Jones' Diary,** shouldn't I?" and I love it. Quirky characters, they are like my God! And the first sentence of **Bridget Jones' Diary** is: I WILL NOT, for her resolutions, isn't it?_

 _Sam : I felt this chapter was nothing but fluff, and I enjoyed it immensely! I hope you did too!_

 _S.P. Tripathi: Nice gift, I bet he'd be really confused though._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : I thought marimo was a food, turns out its algae, or I didn't read the article enough, I just skimmed it, either way, I just think of "marimo" and "curly brow" as the One Piece version of "teme" and "dobe". I really do love Zoro and Sanji!_

 _Okay, now for the answer: Apparently, the author already answered that question, Sanji's older, which is good cause when I changed the age Zoro was becoming, I put it down a year! Yay! Now Zoro's just turned 23, while Sanji's already 23! Yay! I already said that, but anyway, moving on ..._

 ** _Question: What did Zoro speak to those people about? The ones who were speaking French. (I'm sorry about verbs, I suck at them), if you can, try to translate them all. Try not to use Google Translate. Also, another thing: Zoro uses the term "vous" when he addresses the couple. You'll get bonus points if you can tell me why it's good that he said "vous" instead of "tu"._**

 ** _ACTUAL QUESTION: (cause I wasn't planning on Zoro speaking French) In this chapter, there is an allusion (reference) to a wonderful romantic comedy which I adore with everything I have and have basically memorized. What is the name of the film and tell me what scene I'm referencing._**

 _Oh yeah, I lied, one more question. **Did you think Sanji did good with choosing Zoro's present?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 6th 2015**


	20. Entertain (Distract) Me

_**Author's Note:** Okay, I feel like Sanji's a bit out of character in here, but I really like this chapter. The ending feels rushed to me, but I'm really looking forward to the next chapter, chapter 21, that I think everyone's going to like. I don't own **One Piece.** Also, translations of what was said in the past chapter will be revealed below, thank-yous will be given and then I'm going to explain some syndromes, just in case people don't understand them. This is my first actual step into creating sexual tension and I hope it went well. I think they think a little fast, but I like it. I hope you guys do too! So I just went over this chapter again and realized all the mistakes so I've decided I'll be revising these chapters. It might be a weak before the next new chapter is updated, but since I'm kind of sick and have a fever, I'm not going anywhere. It'll probably take less time. I plan on revising this story maybe 3 times? This is the first time, when I'm about half-way done_ _, and I'll revise it again a third time when the story's done. This thing's looking to be like, at least 40 chapters. I hope you'll like it and won't get tired!_

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS, the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of self-harm, somewhat suicidal thoughts, past abuse**

 **Teasing. There's teasing in here. Lots of it.**

* * *

Chapter 20: Entertain (Distract) Me

* * *

Sanji was fidgety.

He had cleaned the kitchen at least twice and gone through a packet of cigarettes, all within in a single hour. Zoro wasn't even going to be released from the hospital until later that day and yet he was anxious beyond belief. He had at least another half-hour before Zoro came back and he was busy worrying and chewing on his cigarettes, smoking them half-way before throwing them out. Sanji hated wasting cigarettes.

There was no doubt that on that day three days ago, Nami and the others had seen.

He had to roll up his sleeve and let the doctor take his blood, no one in their right mind would miss the scars, the burns, the bruises. Knowing Nami, she probably told Zoro about it which meant Zoro was sure to ask about it when he got back and Sanji wasn't sure what to tell him. He didn't want him to know about the trip he had taken to the Baratie, that probably wouldn't be the greatest thing. He knew that.

The night Zoro had been admitted to the hospital was the last night Sanji had cut.

It was when the crimson fell into the stainless sink, looking like droplets of rain, that he realized what he was doing. He knew that his dependance on this unhealthy manner of "healing" wasn't approved by Zoro, who was currently in a bed at the hospital. He had stared at his own blood as he ran the water, watching it swirl into the drain. The blood he had given Zoro.

If Zoro caused himself to nearly bleed out again, Sanji would offer his own blood again. In a heartbeat, he couldn't allow the stupid marimo to get himself killed over such a trivial thing. That meant his blood was Zoro's. He needed it to keep him alive, and by extension, to keep Zoro alive.

He had washed the knife that night and put it away. He used it to chop vegetables, to mince meat, to make salad, but once he had made his decision on lending Zoro his blood, it was different, being in the kitchen. Instead of hearing a silent voice in the back of his mind telling him that if he angled his hand just a bit to the side, he'd be releasing his own pain, there was nothing. It was as though the knives were no longer taunting him, tempting him to make the first cut.

Sanji wondered if Zoro had any idea how much he had affected him.

He didn't want Zoro to know about his weakness, even if he was certain he was getting over it. After all, that day at the Baratie, hadn't he promised himself he wouldn't cut again and then he had shed enough blood to make it look like a massacre? He didn't want to crack, didn't think he could handle it if Zoro asked him about it.

How was he supposed to distract the marimo so that he didn't have a chance to ask him about his scars?

Sanji was healing, that's what he thought. He was sure he was getting better and better with each passing day, like all his old wounds, though they were still there, were closing up, being tightly closed, with only the stitches and memories to be a reminder of what had happened to him, how broken he had been. He didn't want to take any steps back on his road to recovery, he wanted to heal.

He didn't want Zoro's efforts to be in vain. He didn't want to let the swordsman down, didn't want him to worry about him, didn't want to burden him with Sanji's own personal, inner struggle against himself and his mind. It was too complicated that he didn't even understand it himself, but he was getting there. He wanted to be someone Zoro was proud of, someone who Zoro could point out in a crowd and say with a big smile on his face, "That's Sanji, my friend."

Friend.

The word seemed to cause him a bittersweet sadness. His stomach churned and clenched when he thought too much about it. The fact that Zoro even called them friends— or at least, Sanji hoped they were friends, especially after the dinner he had made him and the blood donation— was good enough, wasn't it? That Zoro was friends with someone who was so … broken, was a miracle.

Sanji wasn't stupid. Though he hadn't seen his reflection in months and avoided mirrors like a plague, he knew he was scarred. He was torn apart, he was damaged. Zoro was, in his mind, that little kid who found something broken and thought by using his superglue, he could fix everything. Sometimes he tried to make the pieces fit too harshly, sometimes he screwed up, sometimes it felt apart even worse, but he kept going, kept trying, certain he could make things right.

Zoro was his friend and that was more than he could ask for. Zoro was … Zoro was nakama to him.

Sanji remembered he had heard somewhere that the term "nakama" was like saying "I love you" in a platonic way.

As Sanji lit up his umpteenth cigarette, watching the smoke swirl around him, he wondered whether "platonic" was the right word for it.

The door opened at that moment and Sanji turned around sharply to see Zoro standing in the doorway, kicking off his shoes. "Fucking damn lock," he muttered, "fucking Mihawk for breaking my fucking arm!"

Sanji smirked. "Welcome back, Marimo."

Zoro looked up at him, throwing his keys onto the floor. "Fuck," he muttered. Sanji was pretty sure Zoro was aiming for the couch, but apparently, he had missed. By a lot. Zoro trudged towards the fallen keys, picking them up and putting them on the coffee table before collapsing on the couch. "I hate hospitals," he declared. "Fucking nurses making a fuss over nothing." He laid his head back and stared up at Sanji who looked down at the swordsman with a smirk on his face. "Where's my coffee, Curly Brow?"

"Coming right up," Sanji told him, going into the kitchen. Making coffee was probably one of the easiest things Sanji had learnt how to do and he was so good at making it, he could do it in his sleep.

 _How to distract him?_

An idea popped into his head. "Did you ever get to eat that cake?"

Zoro stared at him. "Why?"

"Just curious," Sanji replied.

"Well, Luffy ate most of it," Zoro said. "What was it, rice cake, right?" He shook his head. "I wasn't all that hungry. I was … distracted, I guess you could say." He twisted his body to turn and look into the kitchen. "Where did you find that sword?"

"Just some sword shop," Sanji said with a shrug. He wouldn't mention the high cost of it, or the way he had begged the man to open up at the shop despite the fact that it had closed an hour before Sanji had gotten there. "I know you probably don't need another sword, since you've already got three, but …" Sanji shrugged, pouring the coffee into a mug. "I don't know, you can hang it somewhere or something, you don't have to use it—"

"No, I will," Zoro said. "I will."

"But you fight three-sword style, right? You already have three swords—"

"Then I'll put another one on display or something," Zoro said with a shrug. "Yubashiri is getting kind of old anyway."

"Where is the sword?" asked Sanji. "They put up a fight with me bringing you your swords before, so where's Shusui?"

"I need to get it back from Nami. She has all my other swords too," he scoffed. "Said I can't fight for a while so I shouldn't be tempted to use them while I'm still injured. Bitch," he muttered but Sanji could tell from the way he spoke he didn't mean it. He was still irritated with Nami nonetheless, but she was his close friend.

Sanji handed Zoro a mug of coffee. He watched Zoro drank it, his eyes closing, his chest rising and falling. "Fuck, I swear, you're like some kind of mystical cook or something." He smiled. "It's been so long since I've had something decent in my stomach."

"Finish your coffee, then get in the kitchen," Sanji declared.

"What? Why?" Zoro asked.

"We're baking a cake."

* * *

"How do you bake with one arm?" asked Zoro. "You said a cook's hands are like, their most treasured possession, right? So how do you expect me to do this? Plus, my dominant hand was injured. How do you expect me to make anything like this?" Zoro gestured to his injured arm.

"Then I'm going to teach you how to do things with one hand," Sanji said with a shrug. "It's not that hard."

"You're not even telling me what kind of cake this'll be—"

"Castella cake," Sanji cut him off. "No chocolate whatsoever, I know how you don't like it." Sanji went to preheat the the oven at 320˚ F and then got two loaf pans and parchment paper. "I need you to take out the eggs right now, you have large eggs, right? They need to be at room temperature. If we leave them out for a while, they'll get there," he told Zoro. "Anyway, this is a pretty easy recipe. We just need sugar, bread flour, honey, warm water and the eggs. Even you can't screw this up," he assured him. "After all, you managed to make onigri, this is just a step up from it."

"Remember that you're a cook and I'm a pedestrian, which means that what you call easy and what I call easy differ from each other."

"Well we can't make rice cake, we're almost out of rice," Sanji told him. "I need to go shopping soon for it. Anyway, I'll get the sugar and the flour, it'll be too heavy for you to lift with one arm, and you can get the honey."

Zoro mumbled under his breath how Sanji was underestimating him but he got the honey while Sanji put the sugar and flour onto the small island in the centre of Zoro's kitchen. "Can you cut this paper?" he asked Zoro, pointing towards the parchment paper. "We need to line the pans with it."

Zoro took a pair of scissors out of a drawer and rolled his eyes. "Of course I can fucking cut, I'm a swordsman, remember?"

Watching Zoro cut parchment paper was endlessly amusing to Sanji. Especially since he did it like a young boy doing an art project. He stuck his tongue out of the corner of his mouth and his forehead creased in concentration. His efforts were not wasted, though Zoro's hand shook a lot while cutting, the parchment fit perfectly into the pan.

Sanji cut his parchment in about half the time it took Zoro.

"Show off," Zoro snapped.

"Experienced," Sanji corrected him. "Okay, I'll get a sieve for the flour."

"A what?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Never mind." He got the sieve from a cupboard and put it on the table before going back to get a measuring cup and a tablespoon.

"Oh you meant that bowl with all the holes!"

Sanji sighed. He knew he should've chosen kitchen equipment as a category for their game in the hospital. He'd have won hands down. "Okay, I'll pour the flour into this measuring cup," Sanji said, gesturing towards it, "and you'll hold it for me, okay?"

Zoro sighed. "Why do I feel like I'm doing all the boring parts?"

"I'll let you crack the eggs if you want," Sanji promised. It was funny the way Zoro's eyes lit up like a child on Christmas, but then he drew his mouth into a thin line and scoffed, his eyes were still shining though.

"Fine, whatever," he muttered.

"Okay," Sanji said. He lifted the bag of flour and started to pour it into the cup while Zoro held it steady. Sanji kept his eyes trained on the lines on the side of the cup. When it was full, he put the sieve above the bowl. "Alright so now, you're going to pour that cup into the sieve and we're going to sift it—"

"Are you making up words, cook?" asked Zoro, staring at him oddly. "Isn't the word shift?"

" _Sift_ ," Sanji repeated. "Not shift," he corrected. "Anyway, you pour it and I'll sift it."

Zoro grumbled about how cooking made no sense to him, but he poured the flour in. Sanji shook the sieve gently, watching as the flour fell through the holes and the lumpy bits stayed put. He took the lumps that remained and poured them back into the cup. "I need you to pour it again, so that we'll even everything out," he told Zoro.

Zoro did as told.

Once all the lumps were gone and in the bottom of the bowl, Sanji handed Zoro a tablespoon. "Okay, we need two and a half of tablespoons of the flour. Put it in the sieve, okay?"

"Can't you just call it a strainer or something?"

"No," Sanji told him firmly. "A strainer is a kind of sieve, but it's not this kind, so that'd be a misnomer," he said.

"Greenland and Iceland are misnomers," Zoro told him. "What does it matter what kind of shive it is?"

"It's a _sieve_ ," Sanji corrected him. "Look, we just need two and a half tablespoons, alright? Even you can do that, can't you?"

"Whatever Curly Brow," Zoro mumbled, putting two tablespoons into the sieve before pausing and staring at the spoon strangely. "Um, Sanji?"

"Yeah?"

"What's half a tablespoon?"

Sanji sighed and rolled his eyes. "Half a tablespoon is half a tablespoon," he said. "Just fill up half of it, okay?"

"But—"

"Seriously Marimo?" Sanji asked. "What, are you not able to?"

Zoro gritted his teeth at him. "I can too!"

"Prove it then," Sanji teased him.

Zoro shoved his good arm into the bag of flour, coming up with what was definitely not half a tablespoon. "Idiot, that's three quarters!"

"What are you, a math genius or something?" Zoro demanded. He flicked what was on the spoon at Sanji and Sanji, in his surprise, loosened his grip on the sieve.

"You're wasting food," he reprimanded Zoro.

"Yeah well, you suck at teaching!"

"You're just a horrible student!"

"Did you even go to school?" demanded Zoro.

"That's none of your business! Half a tablespoon, alright?"

"Someone's impatient," Zoro muttered before he put what was as close to half a tablespoon as Zoro was ever going to get into the sieve.

After sifting it as well, he got a smaller bowl. "Okay, we need five tablespoon of honey. You want to do it?" he asked Zoro.

"Since you won't let me handle anything interesting, sure," Zoro grumbled, but he was really bad at hiding his smile as he put the five tablespoons of honey into the small bowl. "You know, I …" Zoro trailed off and turned away.

"You what?" Sanji asked, putting in two and a half tablespoons of warm water into the small bowl along with the honey. He didn't trust Zoro with fractions. He began to mix the combination with a whisk while he waited for Zoro to finish his statement.

"Never mind," Zoro said, his voice sounding quiet all of a sudden.

"No, you mentioned it now, so you have to tell me," Sanji said. "Otherwise you should've just kept your mouth shut."

"Well I'm keeping it shut now!" Zoro snapped back, turning to him to yell in his face, but Sanji saw the blush that was creeping up across Zoro's tanned skin. "Just mix the fucking stuff, alright?"

"You know that I now have to get it out of you, right?" Sanji said, raising an eyebrow at him. "And I know your weakness too."

Zoro stared at him with wide eyes. "You wouldn't."

Sanji smirked, blowing out his cigarette. "Try me."

Zoro backed away from him slowly, pressing his back against the sink. _Idiot, cornering yourself,_ Sanji thought, leaning over him. Zoro was taller than him, that he'd admit, but it was only by one centimetre and besides, Zoro seemed to be shrinking at the current moment.

"I … I could kick you in the balls if I wanted to," Zoro threatened.

"But you won't," Sanji said confidently.

"Who says?"

"I did, remember?" Sanji teased. "Tell me."

Zoro shook his head profusely. "It's embarrassing."

"Tough shit, it doesn't matter," Sanji told him. "Tell me or else."

"Or else?" Zoro repeated. "Running out of good threats?"

And then Sanji attacked.

His hands stretched out in front of him and his fingers began to curl and ran along Zoro's sides. Almost immediately, Zoro started to curl into himself, trying to stop himself but his laughter came pouring out regardless of his fruitless efforts to stop it. Zoro forced his body to the ground so that his head was pressed against the cabinet under the sink, and Sanji followed him, continuing his assault.

"S-stop!" he cried, tears appearing in his eyes as his hands went thrashing. "S-Sanji!"

"Nope," Sanji teased, tickling him even harder. And then—

"FUCK!"

Sanji's back hit the small island as Zoro slithered out from under him and ran to the other side of the island. "Ha!"

Sanji stood up, wincing in pain. "You kicked me in the balls!"

"Told you!" Zoro snapped.

Sanji winced, sucking in a breath between his teeth, probably looking ridiculous from Zoro's point of view.

Zoro paused. "Does it really hurt?" he asked, looking at Sanji with a worried crease in his brow. "I didn't mean to," he confessed. "It just … I don't know, reflex."

"For a swordsman who uses their hands, you kick fucking _hard_ ," Sanji told him. "What if I can't reproduce now?" he demanded. "That'll be entirely on your conscience!"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Okay, now you're just laying it on thick. Any sympathy I had for you is gone," he told him. "Be a man, Curly Brow, it wasn't _that_ hard, I've taken worse. Namely from your legs, might I add," Zoro said. "Man up!"

"Shut it," Sanji snapped. Okay fine, he was laying it on thick, but it did hurt a little still. The initial shock was gone, but it still stung. "Come on, I just sacrificed my bloodline and genetic make-up to learn what you were saying, so are you going to tell me?"

Zoro shook his head. "No way in hell!"

Sanji sighed. "Well, then I'm not doing anything till you tell me," he told him with a shrug. He folded his arms and leaned against the sink, a triumphant smirk on his face. "I'm patient. I can wait."

"Good, cause you'll be waiting all day," Zoro shot back.

Sanji knew Zoro. He was not patient. Not in the very least.

To his credit, he lasted two minutes before he spoke again, but when he did, he was mumbling under his breath. Sanji smirked, knowing he had won. "What was that, Marimo?"

"I said …"

"What? You speaking French again?"

"I SAID I MISSED THIS, OKAY YOU FUCKING BASTARD?"

Sanji smirked. "I heard you the second time."

"I reiterate, fucking bastard," Zoro muttered. "Can we just continue now?"

"Reiterate," Sanji repeated. "Big word for you, isn't it, Marimo?" he teased.

"I said, can. We. Continue?" Zoro said through gritted teeth.

Sanji decided he had teased him enough and smiled. "Okay." He went back to the table and continued to mix the honey and water until it was well mixed. "The eggs should be room temperature now, right?" he asked Zoro.

Zoro nodded. "So I put them in?"

"Well, you crack them first," Sanji said. "Can't eat egg shells, can you?" he teased.

"Idiot, that's what I meant," Zoro muttered. He took a large egg from the carton and turned it over in his hand before cracking it on the edge of the table. The egg cracked and the yolk dripped down the side of the table.

"Zoro!"

Sanji sighed. "Less force," he told him, trying to not get too bad at him for dirtying his spotless kitchen. "We need six eggs, this is a carton of twelve, right?" He took an egg from the carton and tapped it lightly against the rim of the bowl. There was a small dent in it and with that, Sanji spread his fingers across the egg and let the yolk fall into the bowl. "Like that. Be more gentle. Like … I dunno, like it's your baby."

"Why the fuck would I have a baby?" Zoro demanded. "And why would I be cracking its head open?"

"Fine, that was a bad analogy," Sanji admitted. "Just, don't do it so aggressively. You don't need to use all your strength to do it," he reminded him.

Zoro sighed and took another egg. He cracked it on the side of the bowl like Sanji had done, but when he tried to open it over the bowl, the yolk seemed to seep out and coat his fingers. He threw the useless egg into the sink and growled under his breath. "Fucking eggs are stupid," he muttered.

"Just watch carefully, okay?" Sanji said, repeating his usual cracking of the egg.

When he was done and had thrown the shell away, he found Zoro was staring at him. Well, not him exactly, but his hands. "What?" he asked.

Zoro reached out as though in a trance and took one of Sanji's hands in his. He turned it over so the palm was facing upwards and ran his thumb over Sanji's fingers. It was a very strange position to be in, especially considering Zoro was doing this all with one hand. He held Sanji's hand like a kid would hold a parent's when crossing the street, but then he unlaced his fingers and let them trace over the light calluses on Sanji's fingers.

"They're beautiful," Zoro seemed to mutter under his breath.

Sanji's breath caught in his throat as he watched Zoro's thumb as it traced over his life line, his touch gentle and soft. It was true that both men had calluses on their hands, but Zoro's had been earned through gripping his swords and fighting, while Sanji's were from holding the knives in the kitchen. Sanji's were more subtle than Zoro's, less obvious, smoother.

"Zoro …"

"Hmm?" asked Zoro, his fingers continued to play with Sanji's as though memorizing the surface of his skin.

"The … the eggs," Sanji said in a quiet voice. He didn't want Zoro to stop, feeling his fingers in his was something indescribable he had never experienced before, but they had a cake to make, and if Zoro held Sanji's hand any longer, the cook could not be held responsible for his actions. Plus, Zoro was getting yolk all over him.

Zoro looked up as though realizing this for the first time and he instantly let go of Sanji's hand.

Sanji's hand still felt warm but it was slowly disappearing as Zoro nodded and wiped his hand on his pants. "Right. That's two eggs, we need four more?" he asked.

"Yeah," Sanji said. He wondered if Zoro was as fazed as he was over what had just happened. The only indication was Zoro's brief cough into his hand before he took another egg from the carton.

Eight more eggs were left in the carton.

Zoro hit it on the side of the bowl and pressed his thumb into the crack, letting the yolk leak out of the crack. He tried to separate the egg so the inside would come out, but he was probably scared of getting the shell in the mixture. Sanji sighed and using his hands, he held open the egg for him, the large yellow middle falling into the bowl with a _plop_.

Sanji wondered if Zoro could feel his rapid heartbeat through his back. He hoped not.

"Fuck this," Zoro muttered. "It's impossible."

"You almost got it," Sanji told him. "Besides, we just need three more. We're half-way there."

Zoro took another egg and cracked it against the rim. He tried to part it, but with only one hand, it was hard.

"Here, let me help," Sanji said, holding out his hands to help him, his head practically in Zoro's neck as he peered over his shoulder. Zoro shivered and turned around quickly, his back pressed against the table with the egg still in his hands. He was … trembling?

Sanji didn't dare think too much about it, his hands going out and resting on the table on either side of Zoro to steady himself and instead, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, calming himself down. He didn't understand what was happening, why his body seemed so sensitive at the moment, why he seemed so acutely aware of Zoro's movements. He opened his eyes again and they landed on Zoro's lips, which were slightly parted.

That first kiss … Sanji had nearly no time to register it, no time to react. He had been too shocked, too immobilized to do anything. But if he initiated it, maybe …?

He looked back up at Zoro whose eyes seemed downcast as well. Were they thinking the same thing? Maybe …

 _CRACK!_

Sanji didn't register it until after it happened. One second he was contemplating leaning closer and if he was right, Zoro had been moving closer too and the next, there was yolk in his eye.

Zoro had … Zoro had cracked an egg on his head.

 _The bastard!_

"Zoro Roronoa, you're going to regret the day you were born!" Sanji promised. First a kick in the balls, now an egg on the head? Wiping the yolk out of his eye, he saw red in fury. Instead of considering the fact that he could be wasting very usable ingredients, he grabbed the bag of flour that was left on the counter and taking a handful of it, he threw it in the swordsman face.

Zoro blinked, his face now looking white. He slipped out from under Sanji and backed away, an evil grin on his face. "Oh, it's on!" he declared. He took a spoon from the table and put it in the honey.

"No!" Sanji said. He was wearing a nice blazer! In fact, this one was his favourite.

"Try me," Zoro threatened.

"This isn't fair!" Sanji snapped. "You've already kicked me in the balls and gotten me full of yolk," he said. "You can't do anymore damage! I still need to retaliate one more time. If you get me covered in honey, then it becomes a war!"

"Becomes a war?" Zoro echoed thoughtfully. He grinned wickedly. "It's already war!" And with that, he threw his hand back and flung the honey at Sanji.

Sanji ducked and went to the sink. He opened the tap and and turned it on. The tap acted like a shower head, able to extend off the sink and Sanji planned on using it. Using the tap like a hose, he sprayed Zoro from across the table with cold water.

"Hey!" Zoro snapped. "I'm injured!"

"Like that'll save you now," Sanji said with a roll of his eyes.

Zoro grabbed the sieve as though that could protect him, using it as a shield. It was a wobbly shield anyway, being held up by only one hand, the weight was uneven. "Fuck, why does this thing have holes?" he demanded.

Grabbing an egg from the carton, Sanji threw it at Zoro, who tried to duck, but it landed in his hair anyway.

"Fuck you!" Zoro yelled at him, but the laughter was clear in his eyes. He grabbed the sugar bag and raced over to Sanji, dumping it on his head.

Sanji coughed, unable to see until the majority of the sugar had been emptied and it was placed back on the table. When the smoke created by the sugar had cleared, he could see Zoro who was staring at him triumphantly, as though he had won a great battle. "Stop gloating, Marimo," Sanji told him, but his coughing fit interrupted the death glare he was sending him.

"I'm not gloating," Zoro said.

"Not aloud you're not," Sanji admitted, "but I can hear your thoughts. They're obnoxious."

Sanji sighed. Now that the high of the fight was gone, he realized what a mess had been made and he had cleaned the kitchen twice already! _Twice_! It was such a waste of food …

Sanji stared at his hand, turning it over. His cigarette was ruined, so he threw it out. His blazer would need a thorough cleaning if he was ever going to be able to wear it again. He sighed and decided he had no choice. He licked his index finger, shivering at the amount of sugar. It was too sweet, but to let the food go to waste …

Zoro stared at him as Sanji started sucking on his finger, wrapping his tongue around it, trying to get all the sugar off. May as well salvage what he could, shouldn't he? When it was clean, he started sucking on his middle finger as well. It really was too sweet.

"S-Sanji …"

Sanji looked up at Zoro who simply stared at him, mouth agape.

"What are you looking at, Marimo?" he asked, sticking a third finger into his mouth. "It's a fucking waste," he said.

Zoro's mouth closed and he licked his lips slowly. Sanji stopped sucking, watching the way Zoro's tongue traced his lips, slowly before returning back to his mouth. God, what was this feeling? His pants felt a little too tight and the look in Zoro's eyes was making them tighter.

Oh fuck, was he being turned on by that moss-headed swordsman?

He watched Zoro carefully, the way Zoro seemed to try to look away, his hand fidgeting, but he kept watching Sanji, like he couldn't tear his gaze away. He looked flustered. Sanji smirked. Well, at least he wasn't the only one suffering. He took the three fingers out of his mouth and licked up his palm slowly, keeping eye-contact the entire time.

He watched Zoro's Adam's apple bob as he gulped.

Letting his hand drop, Sanji licked his lips. It was sweet, too sweet. And this felt like sweet, sweet torture so it seemed to fit. He kept his eyes on Zoro, watching for a reaction. Was he overstepping his boundaries? What if the swordsman was only this way because of the tension that hung in the air? He couldn't let himself think too much of this. If he read into it and it turned out to be something different, Sanji wasn't sure if he could handle it.

Still …

He took a step closer to Zoro, who backed up instinctively.

"You've made a mess," he said in a soft voice.

"Ngg," was the only thing that came out of Zoro's mouth. He was gripping the table as though it was his life-line, and from the way his eyes dropped down to Sanji's lips, were they on the same page? Could he maybe …? Just one more time?

Sanji leaned closer still, his hands going on either side of Zoro, trapping him for the thousandth time that day. "Zoro," he said in a quiet voice, sounding hoarse and husky. He took one of his hands off the counter, instead lacing it between Zoro's fingers, revelling in the warmth of the contact. Zoro seemed like he was coming closer too and if Sanji tilted his head just a little—

 _BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!_

It took Sanji a few moments to register what the sound was. The oven. There was smoke coming from the oven.

He untangled himself from Zoro and opened the oven. "Open the windows and fan the smoke alarm," Sanji instructed, turning off the oven and lighting up another cigarette. Zoro just stood there, dumbfounded. "Go!"

Immediately, Zoro sprinted away to open the windows.

Sanji fell back, leaning against the stove and sighed.

So close … _so fucking close._

Had the smoke alarm not gone off, would they have …?

Sanji shook his head. No, just because he was starting to open himself up to the idea of liking Zoro, that didn't mean he felt the same. But at the very least he had learnt that Zoro found him sexually attractive. The bulge in his pants had been proof enough.

But just a physical relationship … Sanji could barely handle an emotional one, could he really handle something that was only physical? Besides, Zoro had probably been out of his mind at that moment, it didn't mean anything.

 _Of course,_ Sanji mused to himself. _When I finally let someone in, it's a fucking green-haired marimo who probably has Florence Nightingale syndrome._

And yet when Zoro came back and they finished the cake, watching Zoro as he ate Sanji's food, Sanji closed his eyes and hoped just maybe, maybe there was something else there.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay, now for the thank-yous!_

 _Raigon : I enjoy teasing people and I hope it worked. I just remember with my own original characters, I realized one of them was most compatible with another male character I had created and thus, the two became bisexual, but then I was like, "I want you to draw them shirtless" to my friend who enjoys drawing my characters and she was all like, "I need a story" so I was like, "Okay, story where they end up shirtless by the end? Okay, I can do that ..." and then I was like, "Kitchen scene!" And I wrote it and it included whipped cream. I enjoy kitchen teasing scenes, they didn't end up shirtless in this story cause well ... I don't know how Zoro would do that, but anyway ... _

_JustCallMeLucie : Yeah, I changed Zoro's swords from when he fought Sanji so that instead of Shusui, he had his other sword he got before Shusui. Because of the past of Shusui, (which I'm fuzzy on cause I haven't reached the time-skip yet, and I'm not even close to it at all, or is it before the time-skip? I feel like a loser writing a story about a fandom I know so little about) about how it was basically like, taken from the grave, yeah, uh, that isn't possible in this AU. So I kinda decided that's how Zoro gets it._

 _Dyloa : Told you, I suck at verbs, but I tried really hard! And then someone pointed out how I forgot a t at the end of "sont" and I felt really stupid. I tried to use a bescherelle, but I've never had much patience for them._

 _Michikuni Mayu: Thanks! I'm really happy you like it! I kinda feel like I'm making a fool out of myself, writing in French and still not managing, but to be fair, there's like, a thousand tenses of verbs and our teachers are just like, "here's a tense of verb. Use it." And they never properly explain how to use it. Apparently though, us anglophoes can guess pretty well when to use imparfait and passé compossé (And I feel like I just spelt that wrong). I swear I'm good at French, just not so much at writing it._

 _Ayamichan34 (x2): Sanji wrapped up ... That'd be interesting. I bet he'd choke on all the smoke though since I doubt he'd be in that box without his cigarette. _

_Alright, so what they said, I'll write it in French and then the translation. Maybe reread the chapter with these translations in mind. It makes it sweeter._

 _ **French** : "On ne parle pas japonais,"_  
 _ **English** : "We don't speak Japanese."_

 _ **French** : "Je m'excuse, je ne veux pas vous deranger, sauf c'est seulement que je suis in peu perdu. Es-ce que vous pourriez m'aidé?"_  
 _ **English** : "Excuse me, I don't want to bother you, but I'm a bit lost. Could you help me?"_

 _**French** : "Où est l'autre homme qui était avec vous?"_  
 _ **English** : "Where's the other man that was with you?"_

 _ **French** : "Je sais pas. Savez-vous comment allez a l'aire de restauration?"_  
 _ **English** : "I don't know. Do you know how to get to the food court?"_

 _ **French** : "Son copain et lui sont vraiment mignon, n'est ce pas?"_  
 _ **English** : "His boyfriend and he are really cute, aren't they?"_

 _Which means Zoro's wish was for Sanji to be his boyfriend._

 _The reference to a movie was **When Harry Met Sally,** which is, in my opinion, one of the greatest romantic comedies of all time. The scene was referenced when Zoro spoke about how he moaned orgasmically in the Baratie and how that stuff only happens in movies. In the movie, at one point, Harry talks to Sally and says that he knows when a woman had a good time with him in bed. She asks if maybe they're faking it. Harry tells her he can tell the difference, so Sally proceeds to fake an orgasm in the middle of the restaurant. It's a hilarious scene, you can find it on YouTube. _

_Okay, if you've ever read my **Bleach** story, then you'd know that Stockholm syndrome, (also known as capture-bonding) is when the captive (in this case, Sanji) develops sympathy, positive emotions and possibly connections towards their kidnapper (in this case, Zoro). The opposite is Lima syndrome, where the captor (the kidnapper) feels sympathetic towards the one they kidnapped._

 _Florence Nightingale syndrome. **Back to the Future** anyone? Okay, so if you've ever seen this AWESOME movie, then you know that Marty's parents fell in love when Marty's father saved Marty's mother from being run over by a car and was wounded so she took care of him. Florence Nightingale syndrome is what people call it when the person who is taking care of a wounded person (in this case, Zoro) falls in love with their "patient" (in this case, Sanji)._

 _Okay, question time! **If Zoro and Sanji were normal people and went to high school, what "clique" do you think they'd each be in?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 2nd 2015**


	21. Defending His Honour

_**Author's Note:** I'll be honest. I didn't think the story would go on this long, but I'm really glad it has. I'm also really happy with this chapter cause I really liked writing it. The story seems to flow better when Sanji and Zoro are together, or when they talk, which is why writing chapters like this, where there's little contact between them is usually hard, but the thing is, since basically all Zoro was doing was talking about Sanji, it became easier. I don't own **One Piece,** or **Zorro** , or **Bleach**. Thanks for the reviews will be below along with other questions._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter. The following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of rape, self-harm, suicidal thoughts**

* * *

Chapter 21: Defending His Honour

* * *

It was when December started that Zoro's arm finally healed.

Three painful weeks without holding a sword, especially after getting a new one from Sanji, and the first thing Zoro wanted to do was fight.

"Are you sure?" Sanji asked him, obviously concerned.

Zoro nodded. "I'm fully healed, don't treat me like a fucking doll," he warned. "And I haven't trained in forever," he added. "Fight me, or are you scared, Curly Brow?"

Sanji smirked. "You got your swords back from Nami?"

Zoro nodded and pulled out his swords. Sanji stared at him in slight shock. Zoro gave him a questioning look before he realized why Sanji was so confused. Zoro turned the dark blade over in his hand and smirked. "Like it?" he asked Sanji.

"You're actually using it?" Sanji asked.

"I told you I would, didn't I?" Zoro reminded him. "So are we going to fight or not?"

"In the living room?" Sanji raised a questioning eyebrow.

Zoro sighed and rolled his eyes. Taking Wado out of his mouth, he sheathed her. "Fine, we'll move, but don't you dare think about going easy on me cook, or else I'll whip your ass to China."

Sanji smirked. "Oh, I'm so scared!"

Once they got themselves settled in the alcove, it was a matter of who would make the first move.

The tension that hung in the air was so thick and suffocating and yet Zoro loved it. He hadn't realized how much he missed fighting with Sanji until he started again. He lunged forward and swiped with both of his swords, Sandai and his new one, Shusui. The balance felt perfect in his hand and watching the dark sword as it slashed made him feel prideful. Sanji had chosen well.

However Sanji got back before the swords could strike him. He lifted his foot and forcefully kicked at Zoro's face, but Zoro ducked. He was slightly rusty, but the adrenalin rushing through his veins was more than welcome as he dodged another attack from Sanji before he took three steps and made three slashes at him. Sanji tried to dodge them all, but he was nicked by a blade in the shoulder at the last strike.

Zoro stopped and stepped back, taking Wado out once more.

"What, are you feeling bad for me, shitty swordsman?" demanded Sanji, holding his arm for a moment before putting his hand back into his pocket.

"You're going easy on me," Zoro accused. "I told you I want to fight!"

"I'm not going easy," Sanji snapped. "I haven't sparred in a while myself!"

Zoro blinked.

Did that mean for the three weeks Zoro was recovering from his arm injury, Sanji hadn't fought with anyone else? He wasn't sure if he should feel happy that the cook had waited for him to recover, or if he should be pissed he didn't think of keeping himself in shape.

"Bastard!" Zoro snapped, going to attack Sanji again.

Zoro hadn't noticed it before, but the blond's movements were slightly off. He was quick to respond, but he second-guessed himself and that lead to close calls. Sanji knew him, he knew how Zoro fought, he knew all of Zoro's moves. Fighting against him might be fun as hell, but that also meant the more you fought with someone, the easier it became to read them. The easier it was to fight them again and again. Each person fought differently and Zoro thought Sanji knew his style like the back of his hand. Was he really that rusty?

Sanji kicked Zoro harshly in the chest and it pushed him back, his bare feet skidding against the cold wood floor. He raised his swords above his head and slashed down when Sanji went in for the "kill". His swords almost got him, but then Sanji dropped to the ground, putting his hands on the floor and cleanly making a sweep of his foot, wrapping it around Zoro's ankle, forcing him off balance and making him fall.

"I'm warming up," Sanji told Zoro with a smirk. He lit a cigarette. "Were you always this easy to beat?"

Zoro smirked at him. "Shitty bastard."

Sanji held out a hand and Zoro took it, helping himself off the floor. As soon as he was on his feet, he used Wado to cut at Sanji's shoulders. The blond took a step back, barely missing the blade. "What was that, Curly Brow?" he teased.

Fighting Sanji was a rush that Zoro had nearly forgotten. He wasn't sure how he had gone so long without it. It was almost like he was fighting _her_ again. Except Sanji was better than her. Maybe he couldn't handle swords and he'd never beat Zoro 2001 times, but that was the point. That's what made Sanji so great. Zoro didn't feel like he was in over his head when he fought Sanji, he was evenly matched. It wasn't a battle of pride and dignity, it was a fight between friends, a warm-up, some playful sparring. And while she had been his goal, what he had pushed himself to be, Sanji was better for him in the sense that he didn't hold back and Zoro could still fight. It wasn't the skill that made him better, it was that Zoro and his skills matched almost perfectly.

Zoro would never forget her, it was impossible to forget your first love. But he was getting better at accepting it. He had never realized it until now. He was grateful towards her, for making him work so hard, for making him reach so far, for giving him the drive and determination to get better. Because without her, he was sure he would have never been able to match Sanji. He wouldn't have been able to fight him, to teach him. He wouldn't be able to feel this amazing rush he got when he was around him.

And yet when they both collapsed from exhaustion and he felt like the wind had been knocked out of him, he felt alone.

When he fought Sanji, it was like they were dancing. They were fighting, graceful, careful and routined. It was beautiful, really. When the fought, they held nothing back and Zoro was ever-grateful for it. Sanji wasn't hiding anything when they fought, he let it all go. He felt as though he and Sanji were closer to each other than they could ever be when they fought each other. But when it was over, the floor was still cold and the apartment seemed empty.

Because for the past while, Sanji had been pulling back. He hadn't been as forward as usual, he had been distracted. Better yet, he had been trying to distract Zoro and it wasn't as though Zoro hadn't noticed.

Nami had said something about the scars. About new ones. Were there any new ones now? He wanted to ask, but he knew that if he did, Sanji would never answer. Was that what he didn't want Zoro to know? He didn't want to talk to Zoro about the scars?

He rolled onto his side to see Sanji, still staring up at the ceiling, a satisfied grin on his face.

 _What are you hiding? What are your secrets?_

Zoro needed answers and as much as he hated to admit it, he was pretty sure he knew the only place he could go to to get them.

* * *

Walking into the Baratie again after so long away made him feel sick.

Sure, Zoro had great memories of this place. That first time he had come in and met Sanji. He still remembered thinking Sanji was a bastard. He still was, but a more sufferable bastard. He remembered that orgasmic cry of his when he had first tried sushi. He remembered Sanji's satisfied smirk whenever he watched Zoro eat his meals. He remembered the playful banter they had.

But he remembered the bad things too.

He remembered the way Sanji walked like he was on glass around the place, the way he calculated his every move to avoid everyone. The way he would fake a smile or a laugh, the way Zoro would sit in his chair, begging to ask him a question, to know if he was okay, but knowing if he said even a word about the blond's injuries, he'd be kicked out in a second. He remembered the look on Sanji's face when he had been hit by that ladle, the look on Sanji's face when he had kicked Zoro. That fatty bastard's curling, lopsided, twisted, maniacal grin when Zoro came into the kitchen.

He looked around the restaurant. Did anyone else know about the secret of the Baratie? Was he the only one? Would anyone in this place care if they knew what the blond cook had gone through?

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and considered what he'd do. If he could get past the receptionist, then maybe he could ask others if they had seen Sanji. He could probably ask around, but knowing the way that receptionist was glaring at him, he highly doubted it.

Zoro saw a blonde woman who looked up from her plate, her eyes scanning the room as though she was searching for something, or some _one._ Her eyes landed on Zoro and she leaned towards the man with her. He gave her a frown and then the woman was making her way to him.

She gave a smile to the receptionist. "He's with me," she said.

"Wait, who the—"

"Come with me, Mr. Roronoa," she said with a smile once more. It was that same fake smile Sanji gave him. She was worse at hiding it than the cook.

Zoro was speechless and could do nothing as the woman dragged him towards towards the back of the restaurant, towards the small hallway that lead to the restrooms. He pulled his arm out of her grasp and glared at her. "Who the fuck are you?!" he demanded.

"You have to be quiet," she told him, "please, we can't be discovered."

"How the fuck do you know me?" Zoro demanded in a slightly less loud voice. "Do I even know you?"

"I'm Moodie," the woman introduced. "You're a friend of Sanji's, aren't you?" she asked. "I've seen you here before, he used to wait on you, didn't he?"

Zoro gaped at her. "How do you know Sanji?"

"I've known Sanji for quite some time," she said. "You're Zoro Roronoa, right?"

Zoro nodded silently. He was still reeling. How did this woman know him?

"I've seen you in the papers, you were Sanji's regular customer, weren't you?"

Zoro nodded again. "How do you know Sanji?" he repeated.

"He's …" Moodie bit her lip. "Our relationship's complicated. He's … he's my saviour."

"Your saviour?" Zoro repeated.

"In a sense, yes," Moodie said. "It's complicated and far too personal for me to explain to you, but let's just say that he's my light in the dark. I haven't seen Sanji in nearly a month. You know where he is, don't you?"

Sure Zoro knew where Sanji was. Sanji was at the apartment, flipping through taped episodes of _Bleach_ , wondering why Zoro had decided to go out all of a sudden. But he wasn't going to tell Moodie that. "What makes you think I know?" he asked. She was overly-suspicious to him. What was her relation with Sanji and why was it complicated? _Wait, a month ago …_ Sanji was with Zoro, wasn't he? "What do you mean he was here a month ago?"

"He came for a while about a bit over a month ago," Moodie explained.

"When?"

"I'm not sure," said Moodie. "It was just some day—"

"When?" Zoro pressed harder. When had Sanji come back to the Baratie without Zoro knowing? Wait, was it that night when he had asked for the cigarettes? Fuck! No wonder he was acting so weird! "What happened?" he demanded. " _What happened when he was here?"_

Moodie stared at him with wide eyes. She looked slightly scared at Zoro's raised voice and his panicked expression. "He … He came in for a while and spoke to me for a bit," she said. "And … and when he was going to leave …" She trailed off, like the memory hurt her.

 _Fuck, what happened?_

"Tell me," Zoro urged. "Listen to me, you have to tell me," he insisted. "Is he in trouble? What happened?"

"There was a man with a hairnet," said Moodie slowly. "He … he started a fight …"

 _Hairnet? Fuck, Patty? "_ Was the man wearing a name-tage? Was his name Patty?"

Moodie looked away from him.

"Tell me Moodie, _was his name Patty_?"

Moodie nodded.

"Fuck!" Zoro ran his fingers through his hair. "What happened? With Patty and Sanji."

"Is … is Sanji okay?" asked Moodie.

"No he's not fucking okay!" Zoro snapped at her. He knew it wasn't her fault, she was just someone who knew Sanji, but didn't know his problems. But for some reason, he felt like it was her fault. She seemed closer to Sanji than the other customers and yet she had never figured out what was happening to him? He could've gotten out of this hell so much earlier if someone had just opened their eyes! "Fuck, it's not my place to tell you, but Sanji's … Sanji's suffering." He couldn't tell her everything about Sanji, as much as he knew those brown eyes of her wanted to know, it wasn't his place to tell her. "But I need you to tell me what happened."

"Patty … Patty hit him," said Moodie softly. "He hit him and then he … he started telling him things. He mentioned your name and then he … he accused Sanji of being gay …" She seemed to be crying, her eyes tearing up. "How … how long has this been happening? Am I blind?" She sniffled. "How long has he … how long has he been in this pain?"

Zoro didn't know what to tell her. He didn't know how to handle crying people. Handling a crying Sanji was easy. You insulted him and then he'd start to get pissed. He would start fighting with you until he forgot what he was crying about. Zoro didn't want to sound sexist, but women were more fragile, weren't they? Fuck, what was he supposed to do?

He awkwardly wrapped an arm around her, holding her close and petting her head. It felt weird and her tears were beginning to seep into his shirt.

It took a while before she spoke again. She was still sniffling, but she managed to speak. "Sanji's lucky," she said softly. "Now I get it."

"Get what?" Zoro asked, pulling her away from him slightly.

"I … I talked to him about us," she said softly. "Alluded to a possibility …" She shook her head. "It was stupid. You take better care of him than I ever could. I didn't even know he needed to be taken care of," she added mournfully. "You're a great man," she told him with a bittersweet smile. "He said he had a place he could call home. Sanji's lucky."

Zoro stared at her in shock. She got it? He didn't understand. Sanji didn't … he didn't like Zoro like _that_ , right?

 _He accused Sanji of being gay._

Did that mean …?

 _No, don't be stupid._

"Look, I need you to do something for me," Zoro told her. "I know you're probably feeling really shitty right now, but I need you to promise me something."

Moodie looked at him through her watery eyelashes and Zoro realized something.

He didn't find her pretty.

Well, no, that was a lie. She _was_ pretty. He couldn't deny that she was a beauty, but he didn't feel any attraction towards her, not in the very least. She didn't make his heart beat any faster, didn't make him feel like his breath was caught in his throat. He had no sexual attraction towards her. He could appreciate that she was pretty, but there was something about her that turned him off about her and it wasn't the smeared make-up.

 _Am I really gay? Am I just noticing this now? Did everyone know before me?_

"What is it?" asked Moodie.

Zoro shook his head, coming back to reality. "I know it's going to be hard, but I don't want you telling anyone about this. It's Sanji's choice who he's going to tell about this, not mine. I've already told you too much, you can't tell anyone about it."

"But—"

"Promise me," Zoro cut her off. "If not for me, for Sanji. He wouldn't want others to know, not like this."

Moodie nodded slowly. "Okay," she said softly. "I won't tell."

"What won't you tell?"

Zoro and Moodie turned around at the sound of a third person's voice. It was that man she had been sitting with, the one with the pink, lavender-like hair. He frowned. "Who are you?" he asked the man.

"Fullbody," replied the man. "Lieutenant Fullbody to you," he added. He turned to Moodie. "We're engaged and you're seeing someone behind my back?" he demanded. "First that shit waiter and now this guy? You're such a fucking slut!"

 _SMACK!_

Maybe Sanji was rubbing off on him, but the next thing Zoro knew, he was pulling back his fist from hitting Fullbody in the face for making such an insolent remark about a woman. It felt good to punch with his left hand again.

Fullbody stared at him in shock, holding his nose which Zoro was pretty sure was broken, much to his content. "What the fuck, asshole? You trying to pick a fight with me? I'm a lieutenant!"

"So I've heard," Zoro drawled. "You say you're engaged?" he asked. "Treat your fiancée with more respect, bastard!" he told him, pushing Fullbody away from them. "And if you had any common sense, you'd know that—"

"It's okay," Moodie said, putting a hand on Zoro's chest, potentially to stop him from launching himself at Fullbody. "I can handle this." She took a deep breath and Zoro got the feeling he was seeing a transformation. Moodie was nice, but she seemed like a doormat to him. The fire in her eyes though was something he'd never expect to see in someone as small and petite as her. "Fullbody," she said, "I'm a strong and independent woman, I'm not your trophy that you can flash other people with. I'm gifted and I'm pretty. I'm smart and I'm not going to settle for a bastard like you. I'm going to speak to my father, by the time this night is over, you and I will no longer have any relations to each other, do you understand me?"

"What the fuck?" demanded Fullbody. "Strong and independent woman?" he repeated. "Who the fuck do you think you are? You _need_ me, you're nothing without me! I'm the one with the influence, I'm the one with the money, you have _nothing_ without me! You _are_ nothing without me"

"Maybe," Moodie agreed, "but I'd rather have nothing than everything with you."

"Fucking bitch! I don't know where all this independence crap is coming from, but you'd better stop this rebellious phase right now, you whore! You're gong to marry me and that's that!" He raised his hand forcefully to strike her but Zoro caught his hand. He didn't say anything, just sent a glare in Fullbody's direction. He wasn't going to interfere, this was Moodie's battle, but if the bastard thought he could get his way by slapping her around, he was dead wrong.

"It's not a phase Fullbody," she told him. "And I'm not under your thumb anymore. I don't need you, and I will not marry for anything other than love."

"Love?" Fullbody spat. "I hate to break it to you sweetheart," the way he said sweetheart sent shivers down Zoro's spine, "but that's not the way the world works. Politics, money, government, _that's_ what matters. Pride and dignity get you nowhere. Who marries for love? No one!"

"I'm not going to be intimidated by you anymore—"

"So what? You're not going to listen to me anymore? Going to pack your bags and leave out the front door? You think people are going to be sympathetic towards you? You think you're going to get anywhere after what you've done to me?" he spat. "It doesn't work like that, it's pretty idealism, but life doesn't work that way so get fucking over it!"

"It isn't idealism, it doesn't have to be if I don't want it to be. Someone once told me that if I don't like the way things are, then I change them. I change them until things _are_ the way I want them to be and I'm finally taking their good advice," she said. "I'm ridding myself of you, _I don't need you_!"

Fullbody let out a laugh that sounded hollow and unpleasant. "Is that so?" he demanded.

Moodie nodded. "Yes." Her voice didn't waver, but Zoro could see her shaking hands. She was terrified but she standing strong and Zoro couldn't help but respect her. "Now leave me alone Fullbody, I'm done with you."

"You're done with me?" demanded Fullbody. "No, you can't be done with me, I own you! I _own_ you and I want a full refund! Done with me? Fuck that! _I'm_ done with _you_!"

 _BANG!_

Zoro took a step forward and with one of his arms underneath Fullbody's chin, he had him pressed against the wall. "I have swords," he told him. "The lady said leave her alone, didn't she? Or are you fucking deaf, bastard?"

Fullbody tried to push Zoro off of him, but he couldn't. He was just struggling like a fish stuck on a line.

"I would kill you right now," Zoro told him in a quiet voice, whispering in a his ear so Moodie couldn't hear him. "But there's a lady present and I don't want her to see such gore. So let's make a deal, how about it? You're going to leave here and you aren't going to come back again, not in this life-time, not in the next. We won't speak of this incident and any money you may want to bring to court, keep it in your pocket, understood? Otherwise I _will_ take out my swords," Zoro promised.

"You'll go to jail for manslaughter," Fullbody said in between gasps. "The great Zoro Roronoa in prison, the media would have a field day with that one."

Zoro gritted his teeth. "Does it look like I fucking care?"

With a forceful push of his elbow, Fullbody's head hit the wall and his nose started to bleed horribly. He crumbled to the floor and glared up at Zoro, holding his nose in pain. "Besides," Zoro added, "they already know me there. It wouldn't be anything new." He picked the man up by the front of his shirt. "Now scram."

Zoro swore he had never seen a man run faster.

Zoro watched Moodie as she tried to relax, but she was still tense.

"You … you didn't have to do that," she said, still trying to catch her breath. She looked like she was having trouble breathing.

"Don't talk," Zoro told her. "I don't think your body can handle it," he admitted.

She shook her head. "You said your name's Zoro, right? Zoro Roronoa."

"Yeah," Zoro said slowly. "So what?"

"Do you know the story of Zorro?"

"Zorro?"

"Two Rs," she explained. "A Spanish swordsman who defended commoners with his sword and a mask. You were named well," she said with a small smile.

"I don't think I'd go that far—"

"Sanji's lucky," she said again.

Zoro decided to drop the subject. "Are you okay?" he asked instead.

She nodded. "I think so." Moodie walked, her legs shaking. She wasn't injured, unless teary make-up was considered a wound. Her legs were just unsteady it seemed. He took her arm and guided her back into the main dining room. He stopped when he saw the bastard Fullbody talking to someone with a hairnet. Hairnet. Patty.

"Are you okay if I leave you here?" asked Zoro in a slightly distracted tone. He gestured towards a seat, "Sit," he told her. "You should rest."

She nodded and thanked him before Zoro raced over towards the kitchen doors where Patty was talking to Fullbody.

Patty saw him and gritted his teeth. "Roronoa, it seems like you're back," he said with a malicious grin. "Didn't think you'd show your face here again."

"I was actually looking for you," Zoro told him. "So, how much money did it take to keep the fight at the Baratie out of the press?"

Patty smirked. "Where'd you hear about it?"

"My sources will remain anonymous," Zoro replied. He didn't want to drag Moodie down with him too. "How about you and I have a fight? One on one, hombre to hombre," he suggested. Seriously, Moodie mentioned a Spanish swordsman and Zoro was speaking Spanish. Was it like a switch?

"Oh yeah?" asked Patty. "What can a wooden sword do?" he demanded.

"I don't fight cheap bastards like you with wooden swords," Zoro told him. "Fight me," he declared. "Five minutes, outside the Baratie. Or are you chicken?" he demanded.

"Chicken?" Patty repeated. "The only chicken I have is cooked and grilled," he sneered. _Really, cooking puns?_ "Fine, five minutes. Be prepared to die."

Zoro didn't even need five minutes, he was pumped and ready to go any second. A small part of his mind told him he was being irrational, that he'd land himself in the hospital as a result once again and then Sanji would have to donate blood again, but a bigger part of his mind reminded him that the bastard in the hairnet was the cause of Sanji's pain and suffering. He wouldn't let him get away.

He ran into the parking lot, got his swords out and waited. He was out for blood.

* * *

Seeing Patty come out of the Baratie cracking his knuckles with a smirk on his face only fuelled Zoro's anger.

"So, any reason for this fight?" asked Patty as he approached Zoro. "Upset I got my hands on your precious slut?"

"Sanji isn't a slut!" Zoro snapped.

"You sure? Cause he was sucking me in like—"

 _CLASH!_

Zoro's swords came down, striking at Patty harshly on his arm. There was a cut. It wasn't deep, but it counted as far as Zoro was concerned. A cook's hands were their treasure after all, weren't they? He readied himself to strike again and Patty laughed at him.

"Roronoa's upset, isn't he? Your little play thing's quite amusing, isn't he? You've got him wrapped around your finger, don't you? Blondie's in love with you, isn't he?"

Zoro froze, letting Patty hit him harshly in the face.

"In … in love?" Zoro knew he shouldn't take the bait, but he wanted to know. He wanted to know if it was true, if Sanji was feeling even a little of what he was. If he had felt it in that kitchen too; the hot, heavy atmosphere that had made him dizzy. He was certain he would've kissed him again in the kitchen if that damn oven hadn't gone off.

"The little faggot's crazy for you, can't you tell?" demanded Patty.

"Sanji isn't like that!" Zoro snapped, gripping his swords tightly. He had enough of talking. He slashed at Patty, aiming for any and all vital organs. His movements were clumsier than they would normally be, blinded by his rage, but he was still striking him, Patty was still being wounded, he was still bleeding and that's all Zoro cared about.

"Fucking slut probably loves it," said Patty, despite the blood that was beginning to get into his eye. It dripped, making vision slightly harder for him. "You're so rough, you like that in bed, eh, Roronoa? Do you tie him up and make him beg?" he demanded. "The whore probably loves it. Spankings always get him hot and bothered I bet."

"Fuck you!" Zoro snapped, cutting at him again.

He just wanted to cut Patty down until he was on his knees, pegged down a couple of notches. He wanted him to bleed, he wanted him to feel everything Sanji had ever felt. He wanted him to feel hopeless and worthless, to feel like he shouldn't even be breathing air. The scumbag deserved it, he fucking deserved it!

"Hey Carne," said Patty, turning to the other cook who was simply watching the fight with his arms crossed. "You remember when he bled? Fuck, it was hot, dirtying the floor with his blood. His ass bled so much, you'd think he was a fucking virgin." He smirked and looked Zoro straight in the eyes. "But I bet you popped that cherry a long time ago, didn't you?"

 _Virgin? Those bastards took Sanji's—_

 _SMACK!_

 _BANG!_

 _SLAM!_

Zoro backed away, breathing harshly. His knuckles were white, his vision was red, his world was spinning. He had over-exerted himself but he didn't regret it. Not one bit. The blood that stained his clothes didn't matter, neither did the way those bastards seemed to be smirking. He didn't care.

He picked himself up off the ground, dusting off his pants. He sheathed his swords and the silence could be cut by a knife, only broken by Zoro slamming his car door shut.

He had to get back to Sanji.

Right now.

* * *

"Hey Zoro, welcome ba—"

Zoro cut Sanji off by wrapping his arms around the blond tightly, holding him to his chest possessively. He wanted to cry. Zoro could admit it, right now he wanted to cry. He wanted to take all of Sanji's pain and feel it for him, no matter how fucking sappy it sounded. He didn't want the cook to hurt, never again. Not after what he had been through.

"Zoro—"

"Don't talk," Zoro said softly. "Just … just let me hold you."

Sanji complied.

Zoro knew he didn't know everything yet. He didn't know the whole story, he didn't know everything those bastards had done to Sanji, _his_ Sanji. Fuck if he was sounding possessive, he didn't care, not right now. He just wanted to hold him. He wanted Sanji to know that there was someone there, someone who cared.

Moodie had known Sanji for so long and he had never told her anything. She had been surprised by what Zoro had told her.

Sanji had never let anyone in and the fact that he was trying to awkwardly return Zoro's hug made him feel blessed. So very blessed that Sanji wasn't pulling away, that Sanji trusted him to hold him like this.

The tears escaped his eyes, falling slowly. He licked his lips, tasting the bittersweetness on his tongue. He bit his lip so Sanji couldn't hear him, but he was sure Sanji knew. Sanji knew Zoro was crying and he didn't care. It wasn't weakness, it would never be weakness to cry in front of him. Because he was Sanji.

All the pain, all the suffering Sanji never let anyone know, Zoro didn't know the extent of it but he knew no one should have to go through that alone. It hurt him to know that he was so good at hiding it, at pretending it never existed. It must have taken years of practice to master it. He held Sanji closer, trying to get his breathing under control as the smell of nicotine met his nose, the smell of spices and sweets, the smell of Sanji. He let it surround him, devour him whole.

 _"Regarde-moi, tu m'as forcé à tomber amoureux de toi, salaud. Tu ne le sais même pas. Et tu ne vas jamais savoir."_

And Zoro cried harder, clinging to Sanji, treasuring the moment with everything he had as the tears fell faster at the truth of his statement. He wouldn't tell, he would _never_ tell.

His lips were sealed.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay, the thank-yous._

 _JustCallMeLucie : Thanks for reviewing! I think I can see Zoro having no clique and just being there. Sanji could be popular too, I think, except I also think that with the way he acts around girls like an idiot, he probably gets first dates and that's where it ends. What Ed Sheeran song were you listening to? Maybe I know it? I want to know the soundtrack you think of for this story! This story kind of has a soundtrack for itself too, which isn't entirely made, but I have it. I don't make stories to fit to songs, which is why I find it amazing when I find a song that explains everything in my story perfectly without me trying to bend my story to fit the song._

 _lilcutieprincess (x2): Interesting. I'd imagine Zoro would be the star of the kendo team, it just fits, doesn't it?_

 _Sabinah (x3) : Trust me, I love angst too, probably more than I should. On the occasion, I just have this immense liking for reading sad stories, but most of the time, I like happy endings. Like, you're depressed through half the story and then it's all happy. My friends say I'm a closet romantic. I try to write everything to be diverse, so writing this story I like it cause it lets me do both angst and humour and I hope I balance it well. Yeah, the Cinderella thing was a rant I just kind of went on ... And as for Mihawk's line, I was just like, "it has to be cool, cold and sound totally awesome" so he ended up saying that. I like updating and besides, since it's my story, I'm always like, "I really like that scene when-" and then I realize I haven't written it yet and I'm like, "dammit, I gotta do that", so that's probably why I update so fast. That and how many reviews I get is really motivating! I never thought the story would do this well, to be honest._

 _Versora : Don't worry, there will be uke Zoro because I like people who can do both. In any yaoi story I write which contains sex, both will be ukes and semes._

 _Okay, question: first of all, **what did Zoro say in French?**_

 _Second: **If you were in Moodie's position, what would you tell Fullbody?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: August 7th 2015 (Okay, why is it that always AFTER I publish the story, and I'm lazy and I read it over on the actual site, THAT'S when all the problems are obvious to me when I'm too lazy to do anything about it?)**


	22. Constant

_**Author's Note** : I will not lie, the format of this chapter is really weird and Sanji seems pretty out of character. Everything Zoro said in the past chapter seems to have totally evaporated. I will be honest: I have a thing for constants, about finding a constant person in my life. Aside from my family, I don't have one but I'm hoping I will at some point in my life. Now I also know Zeff comes off as a bit of an asshole, I know. I also know that the format may get annoying and that it changes near the end, but please, bear with it. I had Sanji's backstory nearly totally figured out by the time we hit chapter 15, and then when I wrote this it turned out slightly different than I thought. I've never been through the things he has, which is why maybe I'm writing this wrong, but I really tried. I also wrote the "beautiful" scene before hand and it was suppose to stop after Sanji denied it, but then I decided to roll with it and continue because I wanted it to be sweet. I don't know if I succeeded. Anyway, I hope you like this chapter despite the weird format and how shitty Zeff seems to be. It's really a chapter for getting closer in terms of Sanji and Zoro's relationship and it was a bit hard to write since the story flows better when the two are near each other, interacting. Like chapter 17, it was easier to write the bit when Zoro was in the hospital, talking to Sanji than writing the bit when he was fighting. I don't own **One Piece.**_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**_  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS, the following things are present in this chapter of B _eautiful Disaster:_**

 **Physical abuse, self-harm**

 **Memories of rape**

* * *

Chapter 22: Constant

* * *

Sanji had only one thought going through his mind as Zoro hugged him:

 _He knows._

Zoro had gone to the Baratie and he knew. It was that simple and he knew he couldn't be wrong. There was no way Zoro would just come back from going out and hug him tightly, asking to hold him because he felt like it.

With that realization, he didn't even care what Zoro said to him in French. He was focused on the sinking stone in his stomach.

If Zoro knew, that meant he would become sympathetic. He would get pitied. He didn't like sympathy or pity. The reason he liked Zoro was because he had never been sympathetic, never felt pity towards him. He didn't look at him like he was a wounded animal, he looked at him like he was strong, a wounded soldier who would get back up the second his ribs healed.

Was this it? Was this the end? Was Zoro going to turn into someone who just felt sympathy? Who just pitied him? Sanji wasn't sure he could handle it.

Zoro's grip on him tightened and Sanji, not wanting to let the man he had come to appreciate and respect in so many ways go, tightened his own grip in return. If this was the end of it, he wanted to brace himself. He wanted to be prepared but he knew deep down, he'd never be prepared for this.

He didn't let Zoro go. He didn't loosen his grip and neither did Zoro. It was like they both knew they needed each other as a life-line. At least, that's how Sanji was clinging to him. Zoro was muttering things under his breath, saying words like, " _jamais_ " and " _impossible_ ". Well, at least he knew what impossible meant. It was a string of words in a foreign language and as Zoro muttered them, he felt like he was drifting away from Sanji, going off into his own world only Zoro could understand.

Sanji didn't know how long they stood like that, wrapped in each other's embrace until Zoro finally pulled away. Was the reluctancy actually there or was Sanji dreaming? Zoro turned his head away and wiped his eyes, as though he had been crying. Sanji knew he had been. "I went to the Baratie," Zoro said softly.

Sanji closed his eyes. This was it. He could handle it, couldn't he? He had braved worse.

Zoro was probably disgusted in him, in what he had gone through and would throw him out. If not, he'd treat him like a wounded puppy and he wasn't sure which hurt more.

"Sit."

Sanji's eyes opened in surprise.

"Pardon?"

Zoro gave him a sad smile. "Sit down," he said. "I want to talk to you. I want you to tell me the truth. The whole truth."

Sanji bit his bottom lip. Maybe, if he kept his mouth shut, he could keep Zoro. If Zoro didn't know the whole truth, then maybe he could salvage this relationship, this sweet relationship that left him wondering if he was dreaming, the relationship that made him feel like he was on cloud nine, while at the same time, made him feel like he was being slowly tortured.

Sanji sat down, his hands shaking. He didn't know what to say, what to tell Zoro.

Zoro leaned closer to him, sitting across from him. "I want you to talk to me," he said. "I want you to tell me your past, the truth. I'm not going to force you to tell me anything in detail and I'm not going to ask you to hold back. I don't care what you might think I'll think, I swear I won't." He reached out across the coffee table and took Sanji's trembling hand in his. If anything, Sanji's hand shook even more. And he started to sweat. "You can trust me Sanji. I swear."

Sanji took a deep breath and stared into Zoro's grey eyes. "Are you sure?" he asked in a voice that made him feel so small and insignificant.

Zoro gave him a small smile and squeezed his hand. "Do you want to hold my hand while you tell me?"

It wasn't mocking and it wasn't teasing either. He genuinely wanted to know. Sanji bit his lip. "Maybe."

Zoro let out a soft chuckle and Sanji got scared he'd let go of him, laugh in his face. Instead, Zoro tightened his grip. "Talk to me Sanji," he said softly.

Sanji nodded slowly. "Where … where do you want me to start?"

"Wherever you feel comfortable," Zoro told him.

The beginning was always the easiest, it was the least hard part to remember, even if it wasn't wonderful. Sanji nodded again and gulped. "Okay."

"Take your time," Zoro said softly. "I'm patient."

And Sanji knew just this once, the swordsman would be.

* * *

 _When I was four, my parents were killed in a car accident. I was at home with the babysitter at the time. The memory's pretty vague to me. It was some drunk driver, nothing special. They wanted to put me into an orphanage because there were no blood-relative my parents were close to, or whom they entrusted me in the care of, but the babysitter, I think her name was Lindsay, she wanted to keep me. Said I was a good kid or something but since she was underage at the time, seventeen, they told her she wasn't permitted to look after a child and they put me in the orphanage._

 _I remember the first day I got there. They introduced me to everyone and there was this little kid, I don't remember his name, but I remember the first thing he ever said to me._

 _"Who's the shrimp?"_

 _I thought that was stupid, especially since I was taller than him by like, five centimetres, but that didn't matter to him._

 _You know how it's like, don't you? When you get picked on by one person and then that makes it okay for everyone to pick on you? That's what ended up happening to me. They laughed at me a lot, calling me "short" and other stupid things that now that I think about it, didn't mean a damn thing to me, but you know what it's like when you're young. Everyone's approval matters to you._

 _I tried to reverse it by using food._

 _The orphanage had a tight budget and didn't make that much money. It was kind of hanging on a thread, a dump really. They didn't have enough food to evenly distribute it, so they just kind of improvised and it became a "first come, first serve" sort of thing. I thought that if I shared my food with the kids when they were hungry, they might like me more. Maybe someday someone would offer me some of their lunch too, that's what I thought. Stupid of me, really._

 _It never happened._

 _The kids saw me as an easy target. I wasn't that smart, I wasn't sly, I wasn't good at making friends either. They took what they wanted and eventually, I just had an old bone left on my plate, without any meat from the steak. Yeah right, like they'd serve us steak. Anyway, I went without food a lot. By the time I realized I might starve to death at the rate I was going at, they had already decided I wasn't going to fight back for my food and when I tired, they pushed me aside and nearly broke my arm._

 _I got desperate. I try breaking into the kitchen._

 _I remember the first time I did it perfectly. It was dark and all the other kids were sleeping, so I thought all the cooks would be gone too, makes sense, right? I opened the swinging kitchen door and it looked like there was no one around._

 _I remember walking around the kitchen, it had looked so big to me and trying to reach the counters. They were too tall for me. I just wanted an orange so I went to the fridge but the second I had it in my hand, I could feel eyes on the back of my head and I turned around._

 _That's how I met Zeff._

* * *

"Zeff?" Zoro repeated. He frowned. "I think you mentioned him before."

"Yeah, I did," Sanji agreed, his hand clenching tighter onto Zoro's. If Zoro was in pain from his grip, he didn't mention it.

"Continue," Zoro said. "I'm listening," he promised.

Sanji took a deep breath and continued.

* * *

 _He's this big man with a crazy long moustache with a ridiculously tall chef hat. He found me and asked me what a runt like me was doing in the kitchen. I told him that I just wanted a snack and he told me it was too late for a snack._

 _I didn't say anything, I just stared at the floor._

 _Then Zeff lowered himself down to my eye-level. "You're the eggplant, right?" he asked me._

 _"Who are you calling 'eggplant', old geezer?" I asked him._

 _"You're the one they keep taking food from," he said, ignoring me._

 _I want to hit him, I really did. I knew he was going to tell on me, that I'd get in trouble, but for some reason, he wasn't going to tell the woman in charge. "Give a man a fish, he eats for a night; teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime. Do you know what that means, Eggplant?"_

 _"What are you talking about?"_

 _"It means," said Zeff, ignoring my question, "that if you give someone food, they're dependent and can't do anything without that person, but if you teach someone how to do something, they can stand on their own."_

 _"How am I supposed to know that, you geezer?"_

 _Zeff had shook his head at me. "Eggplant, I'm going to teach you how to fish."_

 _I didn't get what he meant because after he said that, he gave me two pieces of bread and lettuce with some other ingredients for a sandwich. He didn't really teach me, now that I think about it, I learnt through repetition. I watched him and copied him. I learnt how to do it like a baby learns how to walk, watching and imitating._

 _When it was over, he crossed his arms. "Now you know how to fish, Eggplant."_

 _"My name's not Eggplant," I told him. "It's Sanji."_

 _"And mine's Zeff," said Zeff, "now get out of here, you rascal!"_

 _I went back the next night, just in case there was something I was missing. Zeff pretended to be surprised, but I think he was expecting me. And then he started teaching me. It was weird to learn from him, but he taught me how to cook at night. It was hard to do sometimes, since we had to be quiet so no one else found us and I slept at weird times, but it was worth it._

 _It was kind of like I had a father, I guess you could say._

 _I went through different foster homes, through the system and all. I don't know, no one seemed to like me. Either the pets didn't like me or the siblings that were there first hated my guts. Sometimes I was just a waste of space and parents just took me in cause they thought they were performing some kind of charity for the world._

 _Every time I came back, Zeff would frown and ask me why I was back again. Didn't I have a family yet? Didn't someone pick me up off the street yet? What the heck was wrong with me, some short blond kid, unable to keep a home for longer than a month at most?_

 _It went on like that for a few years. When I was nine, Zeff resigned from the orphanage and decided he wanted to take me in. He asked to adopt me and told me I could have whatever last name I wanted, it was none of his business. I liked to keep things simple, so I just kept my first name. Sanji._

 _Zeff wanted to start a restaurant. He wanted to be the head chef at some big place that would feed everyone, and anyone. I joined him because I didn't want anyone to go through the hunger I had, it was awful. Even with Zeff teaching me how to cook, I got just enough food. We were going to open the restaurant to anyone and everyone._

 _He let me name it so—_

* * *

"The Baratie," said Zoro softly. "You named it the Baratie."

"Actually, no," Sanji said with a laugh. "We got into a fight over it. I wanted to call it the Basket, don't even ask me why that thought occurred to me, I was nine," Sanji added quickly when he saw Zoro's lips curl into a smile. "And Zeff wanted to call it the Tavern, or some shit like that. I don't know how, but we ended up with the name Baratie." Sanji shrugged. "Best argument I ever got into though."

"Were your points any good?"

"I thought the letter B was bubbly and would look nice on a sign and the word 'Tavern' made me think of drunks. Those were my arguments."

Zoro let out a light laugh. "That's … cute," he said with a small smile.

Sanji turned away and fought down his blush.

"Yeah well …"

* * *

 _Anyway, one day when me and Zeff were talking about how we'd get the place started, these two guys came in, asking for jobs. The Baratie is kind of like a giant apartment really, with me and Zeff living on the top floor and the main dining hall being on the bottom floor. We remodelled it so you could barely tell, but that's besides the point. When the two guys came in, I thought of it like letting them into our house, I always think that when I see customers come in._

 _They were Patty and Carne, who were nice, I swear, for the first five seconds. The second Zeff was gone though, to write up a contract …_

 _"What's this shrimp doing here?" Patty asked me. "Can you even cook, shortie?"_

 _"I bet he can't even hold a knife," Carne said._

 _"I can too!" I told them. I didn't like them that much anyway, they smelled weird to me. Dirty. I wish I had pushed them out the second they got there, but I … I couldn't …._

* * *

Zoro squeezed Sanji's hand tightly. "You were what, nine? Maybe ten?" He shook his head. "Even if you wanted to, I doubt you could've taken them. It's not your fault."

Sanji shook his head. "You don't understand, they were … They wouldn't expect anything from some bratty nine year old, would they? I should've …"

Zoro pulled at Sanji's hand, holding it in his own. He leaned forward and both Sanji and Zoro's elbows were on the coffee table between them, Sanji's hand shaking in Zoro's. He clasped Sanji's hand tightly. "Listen to me," Zoro said in a soft voice. "I don't understand? Then tell me. I want to understand, talk to me until I _do_ understand. You're not alone Sanji, no matter what you think."

Sanji nodded, swallowing a lump in his throat. What would it cost him to believe Zoro's words for a day? Just for now …

"Right, so Patty and Carne …"

* * *

 _By the time Zeff had them signing the contract, they had fooled him. Zeff acts all tough and rough, but he's really soft-hearted. He took me in after all._

 _The first few weeks with them were torture. I wanted to find a way to expose them for who they were, for all the hell they put me through. It was subtle though, little shoves, small remarks that no one would really notice were insults unless they really thought about them. It was like they were teasing me and it was right in front of Zeff too but he didn't pay mind. If he did, then he didn't show it._

 _When every new cook came, I hoped they would see the craziness that was Patty and Carne and they'd stop them, but they got sucked in too. It got to the point where I wondered if this really was better than the orphanage …_

 _The first time Zeff went off for a few weeks was maybe six months after we first opened the restaurant. I was eleven, I remember that. Zeff had some kind of business he had to take care of elsewhere so he left the kitchen to Patty. He had already decided I was his assistant cook and you have no idea how much that meant to me, that he made me the assistant cook,_ ** _me_** _!_

 _I wanted to tell him to stay though, right before he left. He called me a brat like usual and told me to behave and before I could say anything in protest, he was gone and Patty and Carne looked like their dreams had just come true._

 _That was the first time they hurt me. Physically, at least._

 _They shoved me around the kitchen, stole my equipment and hid it, juvenile stuff when I think about it._

 _Zeff had gotten me this knife for Christmas, it was a really good, stainless steel one. I used it for all of my dishes. Patty took it and hid it somewhere. I'm sure they had fun watching me have a mental break down over it._

 _I remembered running out the back door and leaning against the building, breathing hard. I was crying, I remember and it was cold, since it was still January. There was a man outside, loitering, smoking a cigarette. He saw me and asked me if I wanted some of it. I think he might've been drunk or high, probably both, but I took it._

 _I remember coughing the first time because I couldn't handle it. It didn't taste all that great, but it made me feel lightheaded and it relaxed me._

 _I've been smoking ever since._

 _When I was thirteen, that's when they started to call me names that were worse than just "loser" and "idiot". I think that's when I first met Moodie too. She was really pretty, in her late teens I think. I waitered for the first time around then too. They teased me, saying she was my girlfriend and then Patty said I could never get a girl. I was too ugly._

 _And I don't even know why, it seems stupid now, but I … I freaked out. I started staring at myself all the time, wondering what was wrong with me, what was I lacking? I felt like I was on the brink of insanity while they called me names, telling me I was fat, I was ugly, that I made other people's stomach churn with the need to vomit._

 _Maybe three months after that, Moodie introduced me to her first boyfriend._

 _I snapped. I … I … that knife Zeff had given me …._

* * *

Sanji was shaking. His bottom lip was trembling and his hands were shaking. His grip on Zoro loosened and his knees knocked against each other. He swallowed and tried to bite back tears. "I …" He trailed off. "Fuck, I'm sick, aren't I?" he asked Zoro. "It was a gift," he muttered, "it was his gift to me and I …"

Zoro got up from his seat across from Sanji and he wanted to reach out and grab him, to stop him from leaving, but he didn't have to worry because Zoro took a seat next to Sanji, wrapping an arm around him, pulling him into his chest. "I'm not going to tell you it's okay," Zoro admitted, "because that's bullshit. But right now, it's over," he said softly. "Do you want to stop?" he asked. "You don't have to tell me the rest."

Sanji shook his head. No, Zoro deserved to know for all the trouble he had gone through for Sanji, he deserved to know. "Just give me a minute," Sanji said, trying to hold back his tears.

"Okay," Zoro said softly, rubbing his back in circles. "Take your time."

Sanji didn't know how long he clung to Zoro but when he finally calmed down, he expected Zoro to pull away from him. He didn't. It was like he was trying to confuse Sanji. He wasn't going to give up a good thing though, and tightened his hold, hoping they could stay like this for just a while longer.

* * *

 _It … It made me feel better. I know that sounds crazy, but it did. Like all my pain was finally starting to show. I went a little over-board the first time. There was a lot of blood and it took a long time to clean it up, but I felt better about it._

 _The next day when I was out waitering, Moodie didn't even seem to notice. It kinda felt like no one would ever notice if I did it. If I kept it well hidden, I could continue and no one would know. So I did. I did it a lot, more than I'd like to admit._

 _It was the same routine for years, just like that. I'd be made fun of, I'd worry about my appearance, I'd get beaten up when Zeff went off on trips. I would put on a smile, I'd get hurt by someone or another, I'd cut, I'd bleed and then smile again._

 _And then you came._

 _You know, I thought you were a bastard when I first met you._

* * *

Zoro laughed at that. "Oh yeah?" he asked.

"Does that offend you?" Sanji asked curiously.

Zoro shook his head. "Nope, that was my first impression as well."

Sanji smirked. "Great minds think alike, eh?"

Zoro gave him a small smile and squeezed his hand gently. "You know what?" he said. "I don't think I need to hear the rest. I'm good with knowing what I do—"

"No," Sanji cut him off. "No, I want to tell you," Sanji said. "You deserve to know."

Zoro nodded slowly and waited.

* * *

 _I got a beating that night, for being in the dining hall. I hadn't been out in the dinning hall in a long time. You saw, I know you did. You have no idea what I was thinking at that moment, I wanted to hunt you down and kill you, make sure there was no witness to me at my lowest point. And then you turned up again the next night and I wondered if you were some devil coming to haunt me for life._

 _And you know we made our deal._

 _That day at the grocery store, when you ran into me …. the reason I was in pain was a bad beating the night before. Patty got mad at me for breaking a glass. The glass exploded on me and that's how I got cut on my hand, but my ribs … Rolling pins are very harsh, you know?_

* * *

"As for the night I kicked you … the night before I had come back into the kitchen after serving and I dropped something by accident. They— the cooks, I mean, slapped my … they slapped my ass and asked me if I liked it," Sanji said, trembling. He felt like his blood had run cold. Zoro would see him exposed now, he'd know he was tarnished, he was dirty. He wasn't sure if he was ready for it, but he held onto Zoro tightly and forced himself to continue. "They … they mentioned your name a few times. Lots of times, actually. Patty told them to strip me and …" Sanji felt like sinking into the ground, his face red hot. It made him flinch to think of it, to remember. He could feel Zoro tense, with Sanji lying on his chest, drawing lazy circles with his free hand, he felt the swordsman as he realized where Sanji was going with his story. "Patty … Patty forced me to suck him off," he said quietly, the tears starting to fall. "And then Carne … he just …" He shook and shut his eyes tightly. "He …"

"Stop," Zoro said, holding him tighter. "Stop, I don't want to hear it."

"But he …" Sanji couldn't see. His vision was blurring with tears, Zoro's shirt looked like a mix of blues. "He forced me onto Patty harder … And then he got behind me and …"

"Stop," Zoro repeated. "Please," he begged. "Please Sanji, stop."

"Carne f-f-fucked me," Sanji finally forced the words out. "And it was so sudden … he just … it h-hurt Zoro, it hurt so much …"

Sanji could feel Zoro's fingers in his hair, gently stroking him. "Shush," he told him in a quiet whisper, "you don't have to force yourself. If it hurts, stop."

"And then …" Sanji couldn't help it, he hadn't told anyone, he needed to talk as much as it hurt him, as much as the memories brought it back, fresh like a new cut on an open wound. He needed someone to know and if it was going to be anyone, he wanted it to be Zoro. "And then Carne he … he came in me and Patty and he s-switched places. Patty … Carne … t-they didn't even _w-warn_ me. J-just shoved themselves i-in—" He couldn't finish his sentence, instead gripping Zoro tightly. "Why did they do it?" he asked in a quiet voice. "Why did they f-fuck me? Did I … did I do something wrong?"

"No, you didn't," Zoro told him in a quiet voice, whispering in his ear. "You didn't do anything," he tried to reassure him. "They're just bastards."

Sanji couldn't speak anymore, instead burying his head in Zoro's shirt. He felt awful, he felt exposed, he felt like he wanted to die, curl up in a little ball and end everything.

Sanji muttered something against Zoro's shirt.

"What?" Zoro asked in a soft voice.

Sanji sniffled and took a deep breath. "C-constant," he repeated. He frowned. "I … I don't know, it's a stupid thing I have an obsession with. Constants. The sun's always going to rise, the moon will always set …" He shook his head. "I've never had a constant," he said softly. "Not one that was for me, not one that was _my_ constant, something that would never leave for me, never change …" He let out a laugh without any humour. "I sound fucking insane, don't I?"

Zoro said nothing and pressed him harder against his chest. He took one of Sanji's hands and looked at it, holding it in his own. He turned it over slowly, letting himself entwine their fingers, run his other fingers over his small calluses. "I wasn't lying, you know," he told Sanji softly. "They're beautiful. Your hands, I mean." There was silence and then—

"You're beautiful, you know."

Sanji rolled his eyes into Zoro's chest. "Yeah, and you're a prancing leprechaun."

Zoro shook his head. "I'm serious."

Sanji shook his head in return, pulling away from Zoro's chest, but Zoro kept him there so the most Sanji could do was meet his eyes. "You need to get your head checked." When Zoro opened his mouth to protest, Sanji beat him to it. "Look at me. _Really_ look at me. I'm as skinny as a toothpick, I'm paler than a baby's ass, my eyes have no depth to them, my lips are chapped, my legs are too long, my hair— God, where do I even _begin_ with my hair? My skin's rough in texture, my fingers look like bones, the outline of my ribs are visible, my arms are lanky, my eyebrows are fucked up, my wardrobe consists of dress shirts, black pants and a tie, not to mention that fucking annoying blazer, my boots are clunky—"

"But Sanji," Zoro said, cutting off the blond's rant. "It's not about that—"

"Oh, are you going to tell me my personality's beautiful? Are you going to tell me that my soul is pure and my pride is admirable? I lost that a long time ago, or did you not notice? I've got the mouth of a fucking sailor, my soul was tainted the moment I entered the damn restaurant and it's been broken to bits since I took it up the ass by those shit cooks! Alright? I'm not fucking beautiful, I'm a fucking train-wreck!"

Zoro couldn't find words, couldn't think of anything to say. Sanji took this as his way of telling him he saw things his way now.

"Don't call me fucking beautiful, you fucking liar."

Zoro sighed and put a finger underneath Sanji's chin. He had begun to dig himself into Zoro again during his speech, but it seemed Zoro wanted to look at him. He looked up at Zoro, into his grey eyes with their flecks of hazel. "I'm not," he said in a quiet voice.

Zoro shook his head. "You are," he said quietly. "You're fucking beautiful."

"Fucking Marimo," Sanji told him in a quiet voice.

"Agree to disagree then," Zoro said. He pulled at Sanji's chin slightly, leaning down.

Sanji closed his eyes. What was this? Pity? Sympathy? Sanji hated pity, he hated sympathetic eyes. He didn't want to see the look in Zoro's eyes, he wanted to pretend it didn't exist. If he didn't see it, he would never notice the sympathy he held for him. He could believe this was about Zoro and him, about the two of them and not about Sanji's sorry excuse for a past.

This was about them. Zoro and Sanji. This was because they wanted to, because they both felt it, felt the pull, felt the tension in the air. This was because he and Zoro liked each other, because he and Zoro were falling in love with each other. At least, with his eyes closed, Sanji could convince himself of that. For even just a moment.

It was right before their lips touched, feeling Zoro's breath on his, that the swordsman pulled away.

Sanji kept his eyes shut. He didn't trust himself to open them and for the disappointment to be hidden. He took a deep breath, trying to bury the rejection, trying to forget that even a wounded person like him wasn't worth a pity kiss. He dusted off his pants and untangled himself from Zoro.

"Night, Marimo," he told him, walking off, never daring to look back. If he looked back, he'd break and he might never be able to put himself back together again.

* * *

Sanji fell into a restless sleep that night, but he kept quiet when he woke up. He bit his lip, smoked until the room's air became suffocating and still wouldn't make a sound. He wanted to keep in his mind forever, the words he had heard in his dream, the wish that had been granted in his subconscious, what could never be, but in dream-land, where time was forever frozen, he could believe it. Just for a moment.

A grey and hazel eyed swordsman telling him, "I'll be your constant."

Just for Sanji. A constant just for him.

Pulling his knees to himself, he knew he was right.

Love hurt. It hurt a lot.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Okay, the thank-yous!_

 _versora : Okay, I swear I've heard that line before but for some reason, I can't remember where it's from! Dammit, that's annoying me! But anyway, I made Fullbody a bigger asshole cause in case you haven't noticed, I've limited most of the cast to the Baratie arc just because they're easier for me to do and I feel most comfortable with these characters. I used him as a minor antagonist and when I thought about it, I think this story's become less of a story of Zoro and Sanji, but a story about finding strength when you're confined in bad situations. I find that you always need an external push to get you started, like how Sanji needed Zoro to get him out of the Baratie in the first place to make his move and Moodie needed Sanji to tell Fullbody off. I don't know, I like to think my stories have deeper meaning to them. Anyway, the way I made Moodie was I suppose, the way I imagined a girl like her would react to Fullbody. Kind of helpless, but in the end pull through because I can't stand weeping girls who do just about nothing. This is why I don't like Orihime all that much. That, and the English dub voice just makes me think she's the stupidest person in the world._

 _Michikuni Mayu: Well, I think that moment's coming sooner than you expected, but anyway, I really liked writing the last chapter. The hug was always planned, except in the original, Zoro wasn't supposed to talk. He was just supposed to pull Sanji close, hug him, not let him go and Sanji would just let him, first acting a bit like a dead fish in his hands, and then hugging him back. Just like a wordless promise that he's there for him. It didn't end up like that, but I like it anyway. I've had a few people describe my writing, or my scenes or stories as "beautiful", but it's never been a story like this. The ones they call "beautiful" are more my really depressing angst stories that I write in a special format, but thank you for saying that! I corrected it, by the way, if you didn't notice._

 _JustCallMeLucie: **Photograph**? I know that song. I think-no, I did put it on their playlist. The thing is though that when I make a playlist, I even put on songs that just remind me a little of they're relationship. And I read **Love Me Dead** a while ago so my music has also expanded a lot. There will be a few chapters with song titles as their names with lyrics of what I really want people to focus on at the beginning, but otherwise, if you want the playlist, I can share it with you by PM or something. I'm very childish, I find, I listen to music from like, the early 2000s, or some reason stuff, but yeah, I'm a teenager, sorry if you don't like my music. If there's a song as the title of a chapter, I do hope you listen to it though. You'll know if it's a song, there will be lyrics at the beginning. Like I said before, I don't make my story fit to any particular song, I don't build it around a song, so when I find a song that fits, I'm really happy. Nope, it's not pneumonia, I've just got a bad cough and headache. My fever, which I had before, went down a bit._

 _Dyloa: I figured it was an arranged marriage, before she was born sort of thing, so she couldn't really get out of it. I wanted to make a verbally strong character and for Sanji's chivalry for women rub off on Zoro so he'd handle her physical fights, not to make her sound weak. I'm sure she could've packed a bitch slap in there, but she didn't, probably since this was her first time standing up, she was shaking so much._

 _lilcutieprincess: i've updated! Anyway, I hope this format doesn't screw with your head too much! _

_Okay, now what did Zoro say in French? Well, what I wanted him to say, and what I think the correction was (which I did put there), was "Look at me, you're making me fall in love with you, and you don't even know it, bastard. And you'll never know."_

 _Okay, question time! Zoro called Sanji beautiful. If you hadn't noticed throughout the story Sanji uses the word "pretty" to describe the majority of girls he meets. That's just because I have sentimentality towards the word "beautiful". Sanji didn't believe what Zoro told him. **What would you tell him, to assure him he's beautiful?**_

 _ **BONUS QUESTION: WHO WAS THE ORIGINAL PERSON WHO SAID THAT LINE ABOUT FISHING AND FEEDING PEOPLE?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: September 19th 2015**


	23. The Last Night

_**Author's Note:** So I just went to the store and bought so much manga. Paid five bucks total, thank you gift-cards! It was 89 dollars worth so I'm pretty proud of myself. Got a lot of **Naruto** and **Bleach** , but since I have no paper copies of **One Piece** , I was like, "I don't think I'll have the money to order a three in one volume", cause by the time I realized I could, I had already bought my 5 manga books. But anyway, this chapter was really fun to write. This chapter was originally going to be chapter 23, then it was chapter 25, but then it went back to 23. There were supposed to be two chapters before this, but then I realized that those 2 chapters had no substance to them. The two chapters that originally didn't exist were actually chapters 19 and 20. So yeah, that happened. Now I highly recommend listening to **The Last Night** because I think it's a wonderful song, but the problem with writing yaoi, all romantic songs are basically about heterosexual couples so yeah ... Also, characters just seem to be getting more and more out of it the more I go. I really hope that I can be one of those people who can write a couple getting together and not ruin the story once they are together. I don't know, I think some authors do a beautiful job at building a relationship, but they suck at maintaining the chemistry. I hope I'm not one of those people! Was there anything else I wanted to say, besides that I don't own One Piece? Hmm ... Oh yeah! **Suki** and **daisuki** mean "like" and "really like" respectively, which translates to, "I like you" and "I really like you". This chapter might make you drown in fluff, as a fair warning. I'm closing my eyes and praying that this meets your standards for an amazing climatic chapter you've all been waiting for! I don't own **Hetalia** either. I watched my brother go shopping for his groceries. He bought like, 12 bowls of microwave ramen. I SO wanted to make a comment about Naruto, but I couldn't. I told him it was unhealthy though and felt like I was Sakura or something. I know Zoro changed his mind pretty fast, but anyway, such is life. I listened to **The Last Night** on repeat while writing this chapter. Yup, you should hear the whole song, I really love it and recommend it. I love Skillet._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 23: The Last Night

 _"This is the last night you'll spend alone  
_ _Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
_ _I'm everywhere you want me to be  
_ _This is the last night you'll spend alone  
_ _Hold you in my arms and I won't let go  
_ _I'm everything you need me to be  
_ _The last night away from me"_

 _-The Last Night,_ Skillet

* * *

He was going to tell him. He swore to God, he was going to tell him.

It hadn't taken that long to decide. Just four months of knowing the cook, about two months of living with him, over a month of being in pain at unrequited love and one night of confessions to bring Zoro Roronoa to his knees, about to do the one thing he had only ever attempted to do once and that had gone over pretty well. Not.

It was just that night with Sanji, with him telling him all his secrets, he felt as though he was as close as he could possibly be to the blond. He liked to think that Sanji had wanted to kiss him, that he was disappointed that Zoro had pulled away. Zoro knew _he_ had wanted to kiss him. So much, he _really_ wanted to kiss him, but he didn't. Sanji would think it was out of pity or some other fucked up conclusion he was sure to draw.

He was going to tell him and he'd do it today. He'd figure out it. Somehow.

* * *

Attempt #1: Subtle Hinting

* * *

 **Time: 6:45 AM JST**

 **Location: Shit-apartment**

Zoro had forced himself up early. He knew that for some insane reason, Sanji seemed to get up early every morning and he wanted to start off the day on a good note. He didn't know what exactly he was planning to do, just that he would tell Sanji that he liked him. Maybe he was falling in love with him, maybe he was already in love with him— no, he wouldn't mention that, that would sound weird, wouldn't it? Zoro mentally shook his head. There was no reason to shock Sanji out of his wits so early in the morning.

He walked into the kitchen to see Sanji making breakfast. Waffles and sausages this morning. He pulled up a chair and waited for Sanji to take notice of him.

It was after a few minutes of humming to himself that the blond turned around to put a plate on the table that he spotted Zoro and nearly dropped the plate in his hand. He put it on the table and turned away from him, seeming stiff. "Morning, Zoro," he said. Even his voice was stiff.

 _Shit, did I screw up? What did I do?_

Zoro sat up straighter in his chair and leaned forward towards Sanji. "Um, Sanji?" he asked in a quiet voice.

"What, Mr. Roronoa?"

Mr. Roronoa? When was the last time he had heard that?

"Did you just call me Mr. Roronoa?" he asked.

Sanji froze and stiffened. "Maybe."

Zoro frowned. "I thought we were done with that like, months ago," he said, shaking his head. He stood up from his seat at the table and approached Sanji, wrapping an arm around his middle. Pressing his mouth to Sanji's ear, he whispered, "I thought you trusted me."

"OH FUCK!"

Of course Sanji would kick him in the balls. To be fair, Zoro realized that suddenly wrapping himself around Sanji had been a surprise and probably wasn't entirely welcomed, but still, it had felt amazing to feel his lean frame against Zoro's muscular torso. He liked it. He _really_ liked it and wished the cook hadn't pushed him away.

"Seriously?" he demanded. Fuck subtlety, he had potentially lost the entire Roronoa bloodline with that one daring move.

"Turnabout's fair play," Sanji told him with a smirk. "You kick me, I kick you."

"I don't kick like a fucking maniac," Zoro defended himself.

Sanji just snorted. "Whatever." There was silence as Sanji continued to make breakfast until he spoke again while Zoro nursed his pained jewels. "So, I figure it shouldn't take me that long to get myself all packed up. I'm guessing you can expect me gone and out of your hair by about nine tonight."

Zoro choked on his milk. "Gone?"

"No objections then?" said Sanji, turning over a waffle. "Great, sorry if I'm a bit loud moving out my stuff but—"

" _Moving out?_ " Zoro repeated. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Sanji didn't look at him.

"What are you talking about, Curly Brow?" Zoro repeated.

Sanji took a deep breath, but he still didn't look at Zoro when he spoke. "I figured I'm a nuisance and my mental state seems somewhat better, so I may as well leave now, right?"

"FUCK NO!"

Sanji jumped at Zoro's raised voice, turning around to face him finally. What he saw in Sanji's eyes broke him. There was confusion, dejection and so many other emotions that Zoro didn't even want to name. "Do you think just because you told me your story I'd kick you out?" he demanded. "We have a nice talk yesterday and that's it, good-bye?" he asked. "Fuck no, that's not the way it works!"

"But—"

"Why, do you _want_ to leave?" Zoro demanded and as soon as he said it, he felt deflated. What would Sanji say? Zoro had been keeping him here with him out of his own free will, but Zoro liked to think he had come to like it here, but what if that wasn't the case? What if Sanji was just waiting for an opening?

Sanji was silent. "… No," he said softly.

Zoro let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding. "So what's the fucking problem?"

"What's the fucking problem?" Sanji repeated. "What do you fucking _think_ is the problem? I'm dirty! I'm a whore! You can't honestly think you want someone like me in your house, do you?"

"Don't you _dare_ say that again," Zoro snapped at him, grabbing Sanji by his shoulders and keeping eye-contact with him. He refused to let Sanji go underneath his scrutinizing gaze. "Don't you fucking dare."

"Say what?" asked Sanji, his voice raising. "That I'm a whore? That I'm a slut?"

"DON'T!"

Sanji shook his head. "It's true, isn't it?" he demanded. "My body's been used, it's been abused, it's been raped, you think I'm innocent?"

"Sanji, look me in the eyes," Zoro told him in a voice that clearly said he was trying to be calm. "Do other people pay you to have sex with you?"

Sanji shook his head.

"Okay. Then how about you? Do you pay others to have sex with you?"

Sanji shook his head again.

"Then you're not a slut, you're not a whore. You're not a fucking prostitute, or a rent-boy. You're Sanji and you're an unfortunate person who's been dealt shitty cards but you know what? You come out stronger because of it," he said. "You're stronger because of it and I'm not going to fucking discard you just because I know you were raped. That doesn't make you any less valuable to me," he told him.

"Valuable?" Sanji spat. "Yeah right."

"You're not worthless," Zoro said. "Sanji, do you trust me?"

Sanji looked around, anywhere he could other than Zoro.

"Sanji," Zoro said slowly, "Do you trust me?"

"More than I probably should," Sanji muttered under his breath.

"What's that?"

"Yes."

"Okay." Zoro's shoulders relaxed a little. "Then trust me when I say this. You're _not_ worthless. Sanji, I swear to God, you're not worthless and if anyone dares to say otherwise, I'll fucking kill them."

Sanji nodded slowly. "Okay." But Zoro knew he didn't believe him, not yet anyway.

They ate breakfast in silence and then Sanji went out to buy groceries, leaving Zoro in the quiet apartment.

* * *

Attempt #1: Subtle Hinting

 **FAILURE.**

 **Notes:**

 **Cook appears to want to leave. Why the fuck does he want to leave?**

 **Must prove to Sanji he has a sense of worth**

* * *

Attempt #2: Casual Flirting

* * *

 **Time: 11:16 AM JST**

 **Location: The Idiot's House**

Zoro wanted to pull his hair out. Okay, so it hadn't worked that morning, but he had lectured Sanji long and hard about how much he was worth. He had to tell him sometime today, before he lost the nerve and all things fell to hell and shit. Sitting on Luffy's couch, he ran his fingers through his hair, muttering profanities under his breath. How the fuck was he supposed to do this?

"You know, you could try flirting with him," said Nami.

Zoro sighed and threw his legs into the air on the couch as he laid back. "Oh yeah? And how the fuck do you flirt with a man?"

"You do it all the time, don't you?" asked Luffy. "You banter, right?"

"Banter isn't flirting," Zoro said, rolling his eyes.

Luffy blinked. "Really?" He turned to Nami. "I thought you said it was."

"In Zoro and Sanji's case, it is," replied the evil, gambling, conniving redhead.

Zoro shook his head. "You have no idea what you're talking about," he told her. "Anyway, Sanji isn't even here—"

"Fucking bastards, why isn't your fucking doorbell working?"

There was the sound of something being shoved against a door and then Nami was running down the stairs and opening the front door where a pissed off cook stood with snow in his hair. He looked beautiful like that, with the snowflakes sticking to his eyelashes.

"You look like a fucking mess."

Of course, his tongue didn't agree with his head and instead said such a stupid thing as that. _Stupid, stupid, stupid!_

"You don't look any fucking better," Sanji snapped, taking off his boots. "What'd you do, drown in a ditch?"

"Very funny, Curly Brow!" He rolled his eyes. Turning to Luffy, he glared at him. "What the fuck were you saying before?"

Luffy opened his mouth to respond, but Nami quickly put her hand over his mouth. "He doesn't want you to repeat," she told him. "Anyway," she turned to Zoro, "what were you talking about before you started to pull out your hair?"

"Pull out your hair?" Sanji repeated, staring at Zoro with a confused expression on his face. It was too cute, really. Sanji was going to kill him one of these days.

"It's your fault!" Zoro snapped.

" _My_ fault?" Sanji repeated, snorting in disbelief. "Any shitty problems you have are your own damn fault, Marimo!" He shook his head. "Don't go blaming others for your fucking issues!"

"But _you're_ my problem!"

Sanji stared at him and took a step back.

 _Shit. That was_ ** _not_** _what I meant to say …._

"Wait," Zoro said, holding up a hand. "Give me a second." He ran his fingers through his hair, searching for the right way to tell Sanji. Sanji _was_ his problem, in more ways than one. He knotted his stomach, made him feel things he could barely even put words to, drove him up the wall … He was utter lunacy and yet Zoro had come to like it. He had come to like it a lot. But further more, there was the unresolved issue of Sanji seeming to want to move out. Zoro decided to focus this fight on that topic rather than the former. "I'm not going to let you move out," Zoro told him. "You can't decide to kick yourself out of the apartment—"

"It's not like it's mine," Sanji snapped. "Not like I own the shit apartment. I don't even pay the fucking rent, who cares if I'm gone?"

"I CARE!"

Sanji stared at Zoro strangely. His eyes lit up for a moment, before they became dark again and he turned his head away, chewing on his cigar. "Yeah, fucking right," he mumbled.

"Haven't we been over this?" Zoro demanded. He ran his fingers through his hair. He swore he'd go bald soon at this rate. "Fucking bastard, we're not having this conversation again! Not in front of Nami and Luffy!" He walked up to Sanji and glared at him. He had a centimetre of height over him, but that was all Zoro needed to try and intimidate him. "Listen, when we get back to the apartment, we're going to talk about this, okay? We're going to sort this out because I'll be damned if you're ditching me now. Do you understand me?"

Sanji bit his cigar. He turned his head away from Zoro. "You're fucking embarrassing, you know that, don't you?"

"Do you understand me?" Zoro repeated, more forcefully this time.

"… Yes."

There was silence that fell around the room, the atmosphere thick and the quiet seeming to be ominous, leading towards an impending doom. And then—

"WOOOHOOO!"

Sanji and Zoro turned to Luffy who had spoken.

The straw hat man whistled loudly. "So we're all okay now?" he asked with a cheery grin on his face, nearly cracking it to pieces. "Hey Sanji, you should make us something to celebrate!" he added.

Nami hit him upside the head.

"What?" he asked her.

"Baka!" she said, rolling her eyes. She whispered something to him softly in his ear and as she spoke, Luffy's eyes widened.

"Oops! Sorry!" He let out a strange sounding chuckle. "Me and Nami will just go, we have something we need to do," Luffy said. He began to retreat, but not before Zoro could yell a grammatical correction to him. Honestly, it was "Nami and I", was it that hard to understand? It wasn't rocket-science, not even for the straw brained idiot.

Sanji let out a nervous laugh. "Your friends sure are crazy."

Zoro gave him a lopsided grin. "You didn't figure it out already?"

Sanji rolled his eyes, but they darkened and Zoro knew he was about to get serious. "What did you mean I was your problem?"

"I didn't mean it," Zoro said quickly.

"You wouldn't say it if you didn't mean it," Sanji retorted.

"Yes I would, you don't know what goes on in my head!" And thank God for that or else the cook would know that the way he was chewing his cigarette was driving Zoro absolutely insane. Honestly, he didn't even _like_ smoking and yet the blond made it so alluring … "Anyway, what's this whole moving out shit you brought up at breakfast?"

"Why were you even up at that time?" asked Sanji, raising an eyebrow at him. "You don't get up until I have to call you down for breakfast, and sometimes not even then!" Sanji reminded him.

"Felt like waking up early," Zoro told him, rubbing the back of his neck. Fuck, how did he explain his sudden urge to get up early? He couldn't, not unless he told Sanji right now and Zoro didn't think he could. "You got a problem with that, Curly Brow?"

Sanji bit his lip and frowned. "No," he said in a somewhat small voice. "But—"

"Then what's the problem?" Fuck, he was trying to confess to the idiot, how did he end up doing this? It was like his tongue wouldn't work around Sanji, like he would never figure out how to get the muscle to work. They said that the tongue was the strongest muscle in the body, but at the moment, Zoro felt like his tongue was made of jelly and therefore was incapable of forming syllables, therefore incapable of forming words, therefore incapable of getting his fucking point across.

"Nothing, I guess," Sanji said quietly. He turned away from Zoro with a flash of disappointment in his eyes? Was Zoro imagining it?

 _I take a step forward and take two steps back. Fuck, I really **am** an ahou._

* * *

Attempt #2: Casual Flirting

 **FAILURE**

 **Notes:**

 **Banter isn't flirting, right?**

 **Why can't I just say it? Why doesn't my tongue work?**

 **Stupid Luffy, interrupting a could-be moment. I'm going to fucking kill him, and his gambling girlfriend too.**

* * *

Attempt #3: Straight Forward

* * *

 **Time: 12:34 PM JST**

 **Location: Shit-apartment**

"What are you making?"

Zoro watched Sanji's back as he made their lunch, practically dancing around the kitchen as usual. It was always entertaining, not to mention interesting to watch the cook— well, _cook_.

 _I swear, I'm going to tell him. I'll tell him properly too. Third time's the charm, right?_

Taking a deep breath, Zoro braced himself. "S—"

"Sashimi."

"Huh?" Zoro blanked. _What?_

"I'm making sashimi. I remember you liked it last time," Sanji said. "So I figured I'd make it again."

 _Oh right_. He asked him what he was making. Was Zoro really zoning out that much? He really needed to get this over with, so he could just deal with it and stop worrying about it. "How long till it's done?"

Okay, he was stalling. So what? If you were in his position, trying to confess to a guy who seemed to be a complete lady's man and had a possible resentment towards the male population (despite being part of it himself) due to being raped by the bastards who had ruined his upbringing and childhood, not to mention had trust issues, was convinced he was ugly, going through forced rehab for self-harm and suicidal thoughts, needed therapy for his traumatizing time at a restaurant he was supposed to be able to call home, and had only just gotten over flinching at everyone's touch, you'd be a nervous wreck too.

 _Wow … when you put it like that, I'm in a really fucked up situation, aren't I?_

"Couple of minutes," Sanji said with a shrug. "Wanna play a game?"

Zoro would never admit— okay, well, he was already admitting he was sort of kind of falling in love with the cook, so it wouldn't be a crime to admit that every time he turned to Zoro with that smirk on his face, asking him to play a game, it made Zoro's pulse race.

"What kind of game?"

"You'd know this one. Shirtori."

Zoro had found a new favourite pass-time. Watching Sanji's lips move. "I forgot how to play," he said dumbly.

"Honestly?" Sanji said with a sigh. "You're beyond help," but he was smiling all the same. "Shiritori, it's a word game—"

"Why am I not surprised?"

Sanji glared at him. "Shut it, you know you love my word games. It's pretty easy, one person says a word and then the next person says a word that begins with that word's ending, so if I said something like … I dunno, Zoro, you could say Roronoa. And then to reply to Roronoa, you'd have to say something that begins with A or OA."

"What the fuck begins with OA?"

"Which is why we are never going to say your name in this game, got it?" Sanji asked with a smirk. "I can play while I'm cooking. Hit me with a word, come on Marimo."

Zoro smirked. "Okay. Hmm …" What word? Could he make the cook squirm? "Innuendo," he said simply, playing it safe for now.

"Dominance," Sanji replied.

Zoro could say that didn't go straight to his groin, but he'd be lying.

"Censorship."

Sanji frowned. "Does that even work?" he asked, raising a fucked up eyebrow at Zoro.

"Does dominance work?" Zoro shot back.

"I don't know, does it?" asked Sanji, wiggling his fucked up eyebrow.

Fuck, the guy was trying to kill him, right?

Sanji let out a laugh. "Anyway, don't you want to talk about the whole me moving out thing?"

Zoro shook his head. "Not now, later," he assured him. "We're going to talk about it tonight because there's no way you're going to be gone in the morning. If you are, I'm going to fucking kill you."

"Doesn't that ruin the whole point of hospitality?" Sanji asked him, his eyes laughing almost as much as he was. Sanji didn't know it, but every time he laughed or his eyes shone, Zoro remembered how long it had taken to get him that way, and he was in awe at how much progress the man had made. That and the sound of his laughter really was beautiful.

"Whatever."

"Hmm … Well just cooking can get a bit plain," Sanji said slowly. "But—"

"Did you just call cooking boring?" Zoro asked, flabbergasted. "The cook's calling cooking boring? It's the apocalypse!"

"I didn't say it was boring, I said it could get a bit plain—"

"Plain, boring, mundane, they all mean the same thing!" Zoro said with a triumphant grin.

"They're not!"

"I'll pull out a thesaurus," Zoro said. "I can and I will, you want to try me cook?"

"You own a thesaurus?" Sanji asked, smirking at him. "You know the _word_ thesaurus?"

"Shut up!" Zoro snapped. "So? Do you want me to pull it out?"

"Can you find it?" Sanji challenged.

"Y-yeah!"

Sanji smirked, shaking his head. "No you can't, Marimo. Anyway, let's play a game. A different one. Let's tell a story."

"A story?" Zoro repeated.

"Yup. Three words at a time. We have to tell a story, we can each only say three words at a time. You want to start?" Sanji asked.

"Okay fine," Zoro decided. It couldn't hurt. Maybe he could throw in a confession? He had to be straight forward, no beating around the bush. "Once upon a."

Sanji shook his head. "If you start every story like that, I'll kill you," he declared. "It's fucking stupid. If you dare say that beginning to a story ever again, I'm going to kick you until your thorax comes out."

Zoro sighed. "Fine. Once there was—"

"No."

Zoro glared at Sanji. "What the fuck was the problem with that?"

"You started with 'once'. That's boring!" Sanji told him. "Okay, I'm starting. One day there—"

"You just did it too!"

Sanji furrowed his brow. "I did not, I said 'one', that's very different word from 'once'."

"It's a derivative," Zoro shot back. "If I can't say 'once', you can't say 'one'."

Sanji turned around from his position at the stove and glared at him. "Do you want me to burn your food?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at Zoro.

"N-no," Zoro admitted.

"So we'll do this again. One day there …?"

"Was a boy named—"

"That was four words," Sanji accused.

"What? No it wasn't!"

"Was a boy named, that's four!" Sanji repeated.

"A?" Zoro said in disbelief. "That hardly counts as a word, it's more like half a word, it's just a letter!"

"It's a vowel!"

"Are we really getting into the technicalities of linguistics?"

Sanji sighed. "Fine, we won't get into technicalities, but your sentence is cut off. The story so far is 'one day there was a boy'."

Zoro sighed and crossed his arms. "Fine." He knew that the most logical thing to say about the boy next was his name though, so it didn't matter what Sanji did, his first word had to be 'named'.

"Who," Sanji said slowly. Zoro gritted his teeth. Sanji was fucking up his story, the bastard. "was called."

Zoro grinned. "Eggplant. Called Eggplant," he reiterated.

Sanji frowned. "I shouldn't have told you about that," he muttered.

"Tough luck cook," Zoro said. "His name's Eggplant."

"Fine." Sanji clearly didn't like starting the story, it seemed he had given all the good parts to Zoro. "Eggplant liked to …"

"Eat home-made sandwiches."

"Four words again!"

"It's a compound-word!" Zoro snapped. "Do you know anything about linguistics?"

Sanji sighed and rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Eggplant was shy."

Now Zoro wasn't sure why he did it. To this very day, he'd never know what it was that made him open his big fat mouth at that moment, but he did it anyway. He said, _"Voulais-tu sortir avec moi?_ "

Sanji stared at him.

 _Shit_.

Zoro shut his eyes and braced himself for Sanji's answer when Sanji sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I have no idea what you just said, but that wasn't three words and there's no disputing that."

* * *

Attempt #3: Straight Forward

 **FAILURE**

 **Notes:**

 **Don't speak in French when trying to confess.**

 **Find thesaurus**

* * *

Attempt #4: Post-It

* * *

 **Time: 5:56 PM JST**

 **Location: Shit-apartment**

If he couldn't say it because his tongue got fucking knotted to the point where he was spewing a different language, then Zoro would just write it. _Suki. Daisuki_. It wasn't that hard. And yet for some reason, his mind had blanked on how to write.

He would not let Sanji call him stupid and be right. He knew how to write, he did, but his hand was shaking so much and the bright yellow of the post-it note was starting to piss him off. He had seven hours until the day was over and he was going to get this right, he had to. No, he didn't even have seven hours, he had six. Fuck. Okay, he could do this.

"What you writing, Marimo?"

Immediately, Zoro jumped.

It was also at that second that he realized how stupid he was. Would he actually write it anyway? With how much he was trembling, he wouldn't be surprised if he dropped the pen. Say he _did_ write it, knowing himself and the amount of guts he had, he'd probably scrunch it up and throw it in the bin. Fuck. He could do this. He could.

"Oi, you deaf? I asked you what you were writing!"

"Nothing," Zoro said, biting his lip harshly.

"Oh come on!" Sanji rolled his eyes. "Don't give me that bullshit, what, you writing a secret love letter?" Was that … what was that tone in his voice? Like … he was _envious_? Was Zoro imagining things? Dear God he hoped not.

"And if it is?" Zoro asked, challenging him.

Sanji's grin faltered to a little frown before he smiled again. It was fake. "Who's the lucky girl?"

"No one," Zoro said. It was true. Sanji _wasn't_ a girl. "Besides, I never said it was a love letter, I was teasing, remember?" Zoro shrugged. "Why, jealous?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You wish."

 _Yeah, I do Sanji. I really do._

"Anyway, I just got off the phone with Nami. She wants us to come over to her and Luffy's place, they're having a party or some other kind of shindig."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "You say I'm old school when you just said shindig?" Zoro shook his head. "It doesn't work like that. Shindig is like … the 80s or something."

"You're discriminating against different decades," Sanji told him accusingly. "Come on, it's not that big of a deal. I heard some girl, Kaya's going to be there? Who's she? I think they mentioned her once before."

"Kaya, she's Usopp's girlfriend," Zoro explained.

"Usopp has a girlfriend?!"

Zoro laughed, the post-it note long forgotten. "Yeah, they've been dating for at least six months now. That could be what the whole thing's about. See, Usopp's liked her since forever and she recently recovered from an accident …"

"Is she disabled?"

"Not that kind of accident!" Zoro shook his head. "She was suffering from depression and Usopp was helping her. He told her some of his outrageous stories, you know, like the one he told you about the time he flew to Greece for the summer Olympics? Those are the stories he tells her all the time," Zoro said.

"But they're lies!"

Zoro looked at him. "Aren't lies better than the truth sometimes?"

Sanji fell silent.

"Anyway, that was only one of his ridiculous stories. He told her about how he was once part of a pirate crew called the Usopp Pirate Gang."

"The Golden Age of Piracy was in the eighteenth century, wasn't it?"

"Try sixteenth and seventeenth," Zoro corrected him. "I know, right? He's crazy."

 _"Captain of our fairy band,_

 _Helena is here at hand,_

 _And the youth, mistook by me,_

 _Pleading for a lover's fee._

 _Shall we their fond pageant see?_

 _Lord, what fools these mortals be!"_

Zoro stared at Sanji. "What?"

"Shakespeare," Sanji replied with a shrug. "It's from _A Midsummer Night's Dream_ , one of his well-known comedies. Basically, there's a huge love potion mix up so everyone falls in love with different people then they were originally in love with. Two men end up falling for this girl, Helena and she's really pissed at them cause one of them loves her friend while the other one is the one she's in love with, but she thinks he's making fun of her. Puck, this magical fairy, put a love potion on the boys because he was asked to by his, like, master I guess you could call him? Anyway, he screwed up and he thinks humans are stupid people, controlled by love. Even though it was his fault that it happened, he still thinks they're foolish."

Zoro nodded slowly, taking everything in and just when Sanji thought he was going to say something really poignant and deep, he said, "Who the fuck names their kid Puck?"

Sanji laughed. "Shakespeare, apparently," he replied. "Come on Marimo, we've only got so much time before we have to get going." Sanji eyed the post-it note still in Zoro's hand, blank and unwritten on. "You gonna finish your sappy love letter?"

"I never said it was sappy," Zoro snapped.

"But you just admitted to it being a love letter," Sanji shot back with a triumphant grin.

"It's not!"

"The Nile isn't only a river in Egypt," Sanji said. "Anyway, I'm going to get ready. You should too."

With that, the curly browed cook left.

Zoro stared down at the blank piece of paper. He contemplated writing it anyway in pen, even if he was going to crumple up the paper when he was done, just to get it off his chest, but he didn't. Instead, he glared at the bright yellow offending piece of paper and growled. "ARGH!"

"Zoro?" came Sanji's voice from somewhere far away in Zoro's mind. "You okay?"

"Fine," Zoro called back to Sanji, wrinkling the damn piece of paper in his fist. " _Salaud_ ," he muttered under his breath before throwing it into the trash harshly.

* * *

Attempt #4: Post-It

 **FAILURE**

 **Notes:**

 **Learn how to write again**

 **Learn about Shakespeare**

 **Unknot tongue**

* * *

Attempt #5: — fuck it!

* * *

Zoro didn't care anymore. He really didn't. He was perfectly content to sit on the couch with Sanji, watching some mindless anime while they stayed silent in the dark of the apartment without the cook ever knowing about his damned feelings.

So what if he had looked beautiful with tear stains running down his cheeks? So what if he wanted to convince him he was beautiful, because by God was he? It didn't matter. He could be content like this, watching … Holy fuck, he was watching that _Hetalia_ crack for him! Zoro took a deep breath and tried to ignore the way Sanji seemed to curl into his side.

Fuck, he was so _not_ good.

Before he could second-guess himself, Zoro put a hand on the side of Sanji's cheek, gently pulling him towards him. Then without a second thought, he kissed him.

Was it this fucking good the first time?

His lips were chapped, a little rough underneath his, but he didn't care. He pressed against Sanji's lips gently, the pressure barely non-existent. The hand on Sanji's cheek lowered, snaking around his neck to keep him in place and he swore, Zoro felt like he was melting into him, about to become a pile of mush when it got even better, if that was even possible.

Slowly, Sanji's hand moved from its position on the couch and lowered his fingers into Zoro's hair, pulling him closer, just a little. He pressed back against Zoro's lips softly, his fingers gently fisting Zoro's hair. If it weren't for the hint of barely existent pain at Sanji's tugging, Zoro would think he was dreaming.

He kissed him back, using his other arm that wasn't around Sanji's neck to wrap around his waist, trying to pull him as close as he could. He could die happily now.

With the slightest flick of his tongue, Zoro could practically taste Sanji on his lips. Spices with the undeniable trace of nicotine. It was toxic, it was intoxicating. He heard the smallest hint of a gasp and Sanji's lips parted, just a little. Zoro experimentally swept his tongue across Sanji's bottom lip and the blond's lips parted further.

Hesitantly, Zoro's tongue gently entered Sanji's mouth.

"Aah," Sanji gasped, grabbing with his other hand at Zoro's shirt, tugging at it roughly. Sanji broke the kiss softly, his eyes closed, his breathing laboured.

"Don't tell me that tired you out," Zoro teased in a soft voice, just to fill the silence.

He had made his move, now it was up to Sanji to decide what he wanted.

Sanji slowly opened his eyes and in the dim light the TV provided, Zoro could see the confusion in his grey-blue eyes. "W-why?" Sanji asked in a quiet voice, sounding small.

Zoro took a deep breath. He realized what his problem had been all day. He had been trying to plan, he had been trying to find some kind of method to tell Sanji how he felt when he should've just done it. Thinking about it had caused him too much stress and worry. He shouldn't have thought about it, he should've just done it. That was his problem. He had been over-thinking it.

It was his turn to move.

 _God I hope I do this right._

"I'll be honest," Zoro said softly, making sure he didn't startle the cook. "I don't understand my feelings completely, I'm still confused. I don't know anything definite, but I _do_ know that I don't want you to leave." He watched Sanji's eyes, gauging a reaction from him. "I don't want you to leave," he repeated, "and I'm here. I'm here and I don't plan on letting you go any time soon, so let me be there for you, okay? Let me protect you."

Sanji let out a quiet chuckle. "I'm not a fucking girl, Marimo."

"I know," Zoro told him softly. "Believe me, I know."

Sanji bit his lip, as though in deep concentration. "This … this isn't some dream, is it?"

This time, Zoro chuckled. "Do you often dream of kissing me?" he teased softly.

"More often recently," Sanji admitted, turning his head away, the lightest trace of a blush on his cheeks. Zoro's breath caught in his throat. He was pretty sure the blond had no idea what he had just admitted to, but who was Zoro to bring it to light? "You don't … you're not doing this because you pity me, are you?"

Zoro shook his head. "Why would I?"

"I … I don't know."

They fell into silence for a while, Sanji chewing at his lip. Zoro's heart beat faster, unsure of what to do or say. Did he screw up? Did he mess up what he had with Sanji?

"Zoro?"

"Yes?" Zoro replied, trying not to let his anxiety show.

"I'll stay."

Zoro let out a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. "Sanji …"

"I …" Sanji looked at Zoro in the eyes, the conflict obvious in his beautiful orbs. "I don't want to be hurt again."

Zoro shook his head. "No one's going to hurt you," he told him softly, wrapping his arms around him tightly. "You're not alone. Not anymore."

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Okay the thank yous!_

 _razephyr : I have this thing for people with low self-esteem. I like to make others see themselves differently and this story, given the circumstances, I could believe in Sanji's lack of self-esteem. I always find those insecure characters to be really adorable and so, I made Sanji like that. I hope you don't mind, since I usually like to keep all of the characters in character, but well, I couldn't. Not given the AU plot this story has._

 _Guest : Um, is that a good thing?_

 _AmaiOni : Well, I've written the next chapter, so yay! Also, here's what I think when it comes to love. You don't need someone who looks past your flaws, you need someone who finds that your flaws aren't flaws at all, it's not settling for someone with all the faults, it's seeing those faults as being part of being human and finding the "faults" to be endearing. No one's perfect and I don't like people who try to make characters perfect or anything like that. People who are good with words? God, no! I like the awkwardness, I find it like, a thousand times more endearing when it happens. I swear, I probably had a point to this, but I can't remember it. Anyway, I hope you like this chapter!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : I've heard of Young Money, just never heard anything from them (him?). Memories was the first story for this pairing I've ever read and I still love it to death. God, you have no idea. There was just something heartbreaking about it. But anyway, yeah, I did get inspired by it in several different areas. For one, Partys bar is inspired by it (Well no, Partys bar is in Luffy's hometown, I chose that bar in particular for that reason) and the idea of getting money from their fights was also taken from there. God, there were a couple of things I took from there just cause I appreciate that wonderfully told story. I hope this story also manages to stand on its own though. I was also partially inspired by Love Me Dead, just a bit. It definitely broadened my music, but the playlist was deeply inspired from some songs from Love Me Dead. My friend questions if she herself is a robot, or if rather, it's everyone around her that's the robot. She hasn't come up with a definite answer yet._

 _Raigon : Perhaps they would work best on Sanji. Either way, Zoro has an idea in mind. It's a secret for now._

 _Okay, now here's a question for you all: **which summer Olympics was held in Greece?**_

* * *

 **1st Edit: September 20th 2015**


	24. Something New

_**Author's Note:** So I still don't own **One Piece** , or **Fullmetal Alchemist.** Don't ask me why but this chapter ended up having a lot of references to it. I know that Sanji's a bit unreasonable in terms of his thought process, I guess, but I really like insecure people (don't ask me why) and I figured, given his situation, he might doubt things. Also random fact: the other day, I walked to my friend's house. I've known her for a long time, know where she lives too. I got lost. For like, half an hour. I left the house early in order to be there for the time we decided and I was late. I just kept walking up and down streets, looking at signs that all seemed to be hidden by trees. I totally felt like Zoro for that whole trip. Maybe the reason why I decided to talk about **Fullmetal Alchemist** is because my friend told me recently that the next Comic Con, she's going to go as Ed. And she totally plans on making his auto-mail. But anyway, yeah. I liked this chapter, Zoro might seem a bit out of character, but for the past while, Sanji's been a bit out of it (chapter 20, chapter 22), so uh yeah, this is my way of saying yeah, Zoro can have strange speeches. I really hope I didn't screw this up cause I hate authors who screw up the chemistry of couples once they actually get together. Please tell me if I failed at it!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 24: Something New

* * *

The pain in his back was all the proof Sanji needed to know that the night before hadn't been a dream.

Opening his bleary eyes, he focused his attention towards the rising and falling chest that his head was resting on. His fingers carefully ran over Zoro's torso, certain that if his back hurt, Zoro's had to be in even worse pain. He could feel Zoro's muscles through his shirt, blue, Zoro's favourite colour. Something that insignificant had managed to stay with him throughout all this time. He couldn't find words to describe it, what it felt like to be this close to him. It sent his pulse racing and his heartbeat was erratic, his breathing almost unsettlingly unsteady. He fisted the soft cloth of Zoro's cotton shirt, closing his eyes once more.

It was early, he knew that. Sanji's internal clock had him up at strange times. He knew Zoro found it odd that on the occasion, Sanji could be found in the kitchen at five in the morning. He was used to getting little sleep and managed to learn how to function at least relatively well with minimal shut eye. Zoro would take a while to wake up and that gave Sanji time to reflect on the past night.

He almost wanted to put his fingers to his lips. He could almost still feel Zoro on his lips, that sensual tongue. Sanji had nearly melted into him, almost wrapped his arms around Zoro too tightly, gasping for air. He had held himself back from moaning, but perhaps he just had a sensitive body that he had been acting so heated up by his kiss. Maybe his skin was just acutely aware of fingers that brushed against his hip, accidentally sliding under his shirt for the briefest of moments. Maybe his cheek was over-actively aware— fuck it, he could admit it, he was sensitive to Zoro. And maybe Zoro was sensitive to him too?

 _"You're not alone. Not anymore."_

Sanji took a moment to breathe in Zoro's scent. Steel, mint and some other kind of indescribable smell that could only be called _Zoro_.

Somehow, the swordsman had quelled all of his fears of being rejected. He felt at ease with Zoro, as though nothing had changed between them. They were still close, they were still able to have carefree conversations. The day before had proved that. But honestly, he was still confused. After the almost-kiss after he told Zoro his story, he had thought that that was the end of any romantic relationship he had hoped he could maybe, possibly get into with the swordsman. But then last night …

The day had started off with his head spinning.

Zoro waking up so early was rare. As far as Sanji knew, it had never happened before but there he was when Sanji had turned around, sitting at the table, slouching. The way he had approached him from behind, practically wrapped himself up in Sanji, it had made Sanji's heart stop. He wondered why it was the swordsman was playing with his feelings, if he had found out the last night— of course he fucking found out when Sanji had practically thrown himself at him, trying desperately to kiss him— and this was his way of teasing him. The way he had told him so gently that he wasn't useless, that he was valuable … He had tried so hard to convince himself it was nothing.

When Sanji had finally convinced himself the swordsman could never want him (and for some reason, it was harder to do during that day. Maybe because he so desperately wanted it), the swordsman kissed him and sent his world spiralling.

He could feel Zoro's steady heartbeat under his hand and timed his breathing with his. Was it possible to feel this close to another human being after so little time?

 _No, it's been a while._

 _It's been a while since the Marimo walked into the Baratie. Since he's asked about magic ice cubes. It's been a while since he's mentioned my scars. He's never pushed too much but he pushes me just enough to make me vulnerable around him. To be unguarded … To be unguarded around a swordsman with three sharp, daunting swords …_

Sanji stared at Zoro's sleeping face.

 _"You're beautiful, you know."_

 _Liar._

But Zoro was.

Sanji had used the word "handsome" to describe several men in his life. He knew a few handsome photographers, handsome journalists, handsome people. But as for Zoro, Zoro wasn't handsome. Well, he was, but the word didn't do him justice.

When Sanji had first heard the word "beautiful", he thought it sounded pretty. Just hearing the word made him think of it as special. He had never used it to describe a man before, but it was true for Zoro and though some may say that the word "beautiful" had a feminine connotation to it, Sanji couldn't disagree more. You could say anything was beautiful, regardless of gender, sex, regardless of what it was in general. If he called a car beautiful, did that mean it was female? No, beautiful was just a word in his vocabulary that had a special meaning and very few things were labeled as such.

But Zoro …

With his sharp features, strong jaw and prominent chin, he was on the road to handsome. But it was his eyes that really got Sanji.

The shade, the colour, unlike anything he had ever seen before. The colour in those dark eyes made him feel dizzy. Looking Zoro straight in the eye always felt too intimate, always felt like he was staring into Zoro's soul. His tanned complexion and his callused hands were proof of his "manliness" and so were the bulging muscles he had. But Zoro wasn't the muscular type who just kept growing, his biceps and triceps becoming more and more grand as he went. No, they were prominent and obvious, no one could miss them, but they weren't in your face at the same time. Sanji had seen overly-muscular men and they were never handsome to him. But it was more than just that. Whether it was his nose or those three piercings in his left ear, he wasn't sure.

He knew fully well Zoro wasn't the traditional "beautiful", but Sanji still thought he was.

Maybe it wasn't even Zoro's appearance. Besides his green hair, Sanji couldn't think of a very remarkable feature of his that you'd notice on first glance. No, maybe it really was his personality that made him beautiful. But Zoro wasn't perfect, Sanji was not delusional, he knew that.

Zoro was tough, rough around the edges. He screamed a lot, swore, had previously enjoyed drinking copious amounts of beer. He had a motorcycle in the garage, without a helmet because he was just "cool like that". He couldn't cook (the Castella cake had been simple, Zoro was just too stupid to realize that), he probably couldn't find his way out of a parking lot, he seriously lacked in manners. He didn't have a way with words, they always seemed to be caught in his throat and he knew he was saying the wrong things, but at the same time, he pushed on anyway, letting out an awkward string of words that came out sounding wrong but you still knew what he was saying. He was scarred, Sanji could see them. He knew of the long scar that ran across the majority of Zoro's torso in a diagonal line and he wondered each time how he got it. Zoro was secretive, he still wouldn't talk about the past owner of Wado, though Sanji had given up hope on learning about it at this point. He had a weird, unorthodox way of showing he cared. He was rough with people, made bad first impressions …

Sanji could go on, but then there were other things about Zoro that shouldn't be as endearing as Sanji found them, but _were_ because it was _Zoro_.

The way Zoro shoved that spoonful of gunk into his mouth and waited for his answer before awkwardly telling Sanji he could spit it out. The way Zoro had dragged him into the kitchen that first night, asking for cooking lessons. The way he had kept doing that until the nightmares finally faded away … When Zoro brought him to a kendo match and got Sanji the best seats in the house. The way Zoro would get his cigarettes without even arguing. How Zoro would watch all of his fights all the way through and he knew all of Zoro's attention was on him. The way Zoro always resorted to the ever fruitless retort of "shut up!" when words really began to fail him. How Zoro said things like they were going to happen, rather than a request. How he had forced Sanji to do that weird therapy session. How he went along with all of Sanji's weird word games. When he fought with him over who would drive the car. The way he had picked out Sanji's phone before Sanji could ever protest. The sweet things he said without even realizing it … The random moments when he spoke French and Sanji was left confused. The way he looked away from that kissing couple in the elevator … That he was ticklish …

There was too much he could say about Zoro, he was … he was just _Zoro_.

Sanji traced the contours of Zoro's face, his eyelids, his nose, his cheekbones … He froze over his lips. Zoro was a deep sleeper, surely he wouldn't notice? With a shaking hand, Sanji began to trace Zoro's lips. They were probably softer than his, and even though the most foul words came out of them, they also said things sweeter than honey.

Zoro's lips parted for a moment and Sanji pulled his hand back, terrified Zoro had woken up. He tried to steady his breathing.

It was the third week of December. It was cold in the apartment. Sanji shivered, trying to bring himself closer to Zoro for the sake of warmth, it wasn't because he wanted to cuddle. It wasn't.

Okay, maybe it was. Just a little.

He easily fell back to sleep like that, curled into Zoro's chest, the nightmares kept far at bay.

* * *

When Sanji woke up, Zoro's warmth was gone. The clock read 11:56. He had slept long. He hadn't even realized he was that tired. He looked around for Zoro, but he couldn't find him. It made sense though, it wasn't as though Zoro would put his whole day on pause just so that Sanji could get his rest.

He walked into the bathroom, carefully avoiding the mirror above the sink when he realized something. Yes, he had blond hair, but what was that highlighter yellow that seemed too bright to be natural? Sanji felt around his forehead and pulled away a post-it note.

 _Gone out to Partys_

 _Be back later_

 _Z_

Sanji rolled his eyes. Of course that was how Zoro told someone he was going out. He couldn't just do it like a normal person, could he? He chuckled to himself and took a quick shower before getting dressed. Once he was dressed, he found a stack of blank post-it notes in the kitchen. Looking into the waste-bin nearby, he noticed the note Zoro had been trying to write on the day before. It was still blank. _What a waste._

In his neat, curly script, he wrote:

 _Marimo,_

 _You've got shitty shampoo, did you know?_

 _S_

After sticking it on the bathroom mirror, Sanji put on his blazer and lit up his newest cigarette.

Waking up this morning had been an interesting and new experience, though his back still hurt —the couch was _not_ comfortable. He wanted to know if last night had been a sleep-deprived Marimo telling him things to make him stay. He wanted to know, _badly_. Did that mean anything? Had their relationship changed overnight? Would Zoro go as far as kissing someone to keep them around? Dear God, Sanji hoped not.

Zoro was at Partys? Then Sanji would go to Partys. He'd talk to him and figure this out, learn what was going on.

While he sat in the back of the taxi, he wondered what he would say to Zoro. Talking about it in public felt too personal, so he figured he might have to hint. Zoro didn't seem to be one of those people who understood subtlety though. Sanji would just have to pray that for today, he'd get it.

He didn't want to admit it, but Sanji was giddy. He was beyond giddy, his whole body shaking, whether from nerves or excitement, he didn't know, he just knew that there was an overly happy voice in the back of his head reminding him over and over again that he was going to see Zoro. He was going to see Zoro soon.

It was during this taxi ride that it occurred to him that he had a phone, one which Zoro had put his number in. Why hadn't he just texted him rather than stick a note on his forehead?

When he got out of the cab, he thanked the driver and entered Partys.

"Hello Sanji," greeted Makino, "you haven't been here in a while. Zoro's downstairs."

Sanji tried to hide his blush. Was it that obvious he wanted to see the swordsman?

He nodded his thanks to her, slightly distracted as he went down the stairs to see Yosaku and Johnny at the bottom, wearing their usual shades. "Hey guys, think you can let me in?" he asked them.

"Big Bro Sanji!" said Johnny with a big smile. "You and Big Bro Zoro are a package deal, aren't you?" he asked, laughing. "The same day Big Bro turns up after his long absence, so does Big Bro Sanji!"

Sanji let out a little laugh. All he knew was that Zoro out there in the craziness that was the underground fighting arena of Partys and all Sanji needed to do to see him, was to get past Dumb and Dumber. "So, can I pass through?"

"Yeah, sure," said Yosaku, letting Sanji pass him and into the arena.

Sanji had never been to Partys so early on in the day. He wasn't even sure if the fighting still happened. Was it a twenty-four hour bar or something? He spotted Zoro instantly, sitting with Nami, talking to her about something. He considered approaching him, but wasn't sure if that was too direct.

It was _Zoro_ for crying out loud, just because he had kissed him the night before, didn't mean Sanji had to get all weird over him. And yet Sanji was contemplating running out of there before anyone could spot him. He was just about to turn on his heel and leave, say that he had forgotten he had another engagement to attend to, when Nami spotted him.

"Hey, Sanji! Over here!"

Sanji winced. He had been hoping he could've gone longer without being found out, but he sighed and steeled himself to speak to Zoro.

It was strange how just a few minutes ago he was up and ready to nail into him— no, bad choice of words— he was ready to _talk_ to him, confront him on the night before and now he was wishing he could sink into the floor. His stomach was in knots as he slowly approached the two friends, his hands fisted in his pockets.

 _Breathe_ , he reminded himself. _Breathe. It's Zoro. Just Zoro_. But though his brain tried to convince himself it was nothing, his heart seemed to scream even louder.

 _Just Zoro?_ it demanded. _Just Zoro? What the fuck, are you a lunatic? It's **Zoro** , you're nowhere near freaking out enough!_

 _Shut up,_ his brain snapped.

Finally, he was in front of them. "Nice note, Marimo," he said. Fuck, it was like his mouth had a mind of his own. No, wait, that was a good thing. He sounded casual. At least, to his own ears. He hoped. "Couldn't have just texted me?"

"Would you have read it?" Zoro shot back, raising an eyebrow.

Sanji had no answer. Instead, he took a seat next to Nami. "So, why're you here?" he asked Zoro.

"Why are _you_ here?"

"Note, remember?" Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "What, you think I'd let you get yourself in trouble again? The last time you fought here, you needed a blood donation. I thought you were a big boy, able to handle swords, but apparently not it seems."

Nami giggled. "You two fight like an old married couple."

" _Old?_ " Zoro demanded.

" _Married?_ " Sanji squeaked.

Nami laughed again, harder this time. When she finally got herself under control, she looked like she was all business. "So, when do you two plan on fighting?"

"We fight a lot daily," Zoro pointed out. "What do you mean when do we plan to do it? It just happens."

Nami shook her head. "Honestly Zoro, is there anything in your head?" She sighed. "No, I meant when are you two going to fight against each other? You know, _in the ring_? I have tons of people who are anxious for it to happen."

"It ain't happening any time soon," Sanji said. "I don't trust him not to impale himself," he told her. "Idiot came home just two days ago covered in blood." He shook his head. "What did you do, assassinate everyone?"

"They were bastards," Zoro replied through gritted teeth.

"It's not my fault you can't handle your own temper," Sanji said. He turned to Nami. "Where's Luffy?"

"Oh, he just went upstairs a while ago to get us drinks. This guy over here," she poked Zoro in the shoulder and he sent her a death glare, "still refuses sake."

"I'm quitting," Zoro reminded her for what seemed like the thousandth time.

"So I've heard," Nami said, shaking her head. "It's almost Christmas, don't tell me you seriously plan on staying sober during the whole thing."

"I do," Zoro said. "You just want me to crack so Usopp will give you his money. You're doing that, knowing what he's trying to do," he added.

"What he's trying to do?" Sanji repeated, confused.

"You remember Kaya? You met her last night."

Yeah, Sanji remembered Kaya. She was a pretty young woman who was Usopp's girlfriend. She laughed and played and Sanji had a hard time believing Zoro's story about how she had been suffering from depression. "Nice girl," he said absent-mindedly. "What about her?"

"Well, Usopp's been thinking about … you know, sealing the deal with her—"

"What, he's going to have sex with her?"

Zoro shook his head, his face turning red. "N-no," he spluttered, "why would you even think that?!"

"Well, married people have sex to consummate their marriage, right?" Sanji said. "Isn't that sealing the deal?"

Nami laughed. "In order to consummate the marriage, under the assumption they haven't already done it, what do you think Usopp's missing?"

"A condom?"

Nami laughed even harder. "A ring, Sanji."

"Holy fuck, he plans on getting married?!" Sanji demanded, his eyes widening. "How old is he? He's like what, twenty-one? That's so young though!"

"Yeah, but you know, me and Luffy have talked about it too," Nami pointed out. "It might not even be a proposal, he might just want to get a promise ring, you know, those things that swear you'll always be faithful? They're practically the same thing as marriage, in which case, I've been married for a while now." She flashed off a shiny silver ring on her left hand. "It was quite an interesting presentation of it. Apparently, Luffy nearly lost it five times before he gave it to me." She chuckled to herself. "He's an idiot, but I love him anyway."

"Exactly and you cherish that ring, right?" Zoro asked. "Even if it isn't an engagement ring or anything, Usopp still wants to get her one and he can't do that if you're robbing him of all his money!"

"I didn't _rob_ him," Nami said indignantly, shaking her head. "I asked if he wanted to gamble—"

"More like threatened," Zoro muttered, his arms crossed over his chest.

"—and he agreed," Nami finished, sending Zoro a look. "I don't see how any of this is my fault."

Zoro sighed. "Never mind, it's impossible to fix you."

"Hey, Nami's perfect!" Sanji said. "There's no reason she needs to be fixed!"

Zoro looked at him strangely, as though these were words he wanted to say as well, but couldn't, while at the same time, there was a trace of … envy in his eyes? He shook his head and sighed. "Where's Luffy? Better yet, where's Ace? I want to have another fight."

"Oh like the one you had with those shitty cooks wasn't enough?" Sanji snapped.

"Shitty cooks?" Nami repeated, staring at Sanji strangely. "What happened?"

Sanji paled. He didn't want her to know. It was one thing for Zoro to know, but an entirely different thing for Nami to know. Nami was a picture of beauty who need not know about his terrible woes. They were his own demons, demons that were not to be discovered by Nami. They were secrets he'd keep for himself, only himself and maybe Zoro on the occasion.

"Got into a fight," said Zoro. "A little disagreement over a tab." He shrugged. "Not that big of a deal."

Sanji swore, if he wasn't falling for Zoro before, he was now. Oh who was he kidding? He was too far gone.

Sanji gave him a thankful smile but Zoro didn't even look his way.

Was he wrong? Maybe there was nothing different? Maybe he had missed something. Maybe last night hadn't meant what he had thought …

"HEY, GUYS!"

Pulled out of his thoughts by Luffy's sudden yelling, he nearly jumped out of his skin. Luffy was running towards them, a tray in his hand, trying to balance three drinks. "Hey, Sanji! When did you get here?"

"Idiot, pay attention to what you're doing!" Sanji snapped, grabbing Luffy's arm and taking the tray from him. He balanced the glasses perfectly and handed them out to Nami and Zoro with ease. Once he was done, he tucked the tray underneath his arm and blew out his smoke. "Honestly, were you raised in a barn?"

Luffy scratched his head. "Not sure, I don't think so though …"

Sanji sighed. Well, this was fun, wasn't it? It was going to be a long day, that he already knew.

Looking out of the corner of his eye, he watched Zoro. The swordsman barely looked his way and he wondered if the balloon of joy that had risen up in his chest since he woke up this morning was about to encounter a very sharp needle.

* * *

Sanji talked and laughed with the others but his heart wasn't in it. Instead, he was watching the Marimo, hoping against hope that maybe it wasn't just him the night before. Maybe there was something there? Sanji knew he could still feel the warmth of the kiss on his lips and it came back to him every time he saw Zoro's eyes.

Had he been imagining it? Had Zoro's heart not been beating faster when he had kissed him? Was he really unaffected by something like this?

Sanji had been hurt before, far too many times. He had done exactly what he told himself he wouldn't do. He got attached. He got very attached to Zoro and now he felt like this was his punishment for it. What was he supposed to do? He was falling in love with the idiot and it needed to stop. No matter what Zoro did, he had to remember he was just someone Zoro had leant a hand to, helped get back on their feet. Was there anyone else Zoro had cured with his magical touch? Were there other people he had kissed to make them stay? God it hurt him to think about it.

He entered the shit apartment and collapsed on the couch, closing his eyes tightly.

All day Zoro had acted normal, like nothing had changed, not in the very least. It was like the night before hadn't happened. Would Sanji just be better to forget about it?

Curling up into a ball on the couch where Zoro had kissed him wasn't helping him, sinking into the memory would only burn him more when he finally got it out of his head. There was still some treacherous part of his mind telling him that it was okay because Zoro felt the same. A part of him that thought maybe all his mumblings in French were something deep, something that held the very thing Sanji wanted.

 _Stupid brain, why'd he want me? I'm hideous._

 _"You're beautiful, you know."_

Fuck, did his brain plan on torturing him to death?

He had gotten away from Partys a few hours ago, walked around aimlessly and finally come back to the apartment. He didn't care where Zoro was at the moment ( _liar, liar, liar)_ , he just wanted to forget everything. Sink into the cushions, hold onto the lousy couch pillow and drown himself in the memory, when he thought it meant something.

 _Click._

Fuck no, Zoro was not allowed to be back yet! That would mean that he'd have to face him. He hadn't prepared himself enough! He needed more time, more time to— to … fuck, what did he need more time to do? Pick up the broken pieces of his heart? He'd probably never have enough time for that.

"Hey," greeted Zoro, entering the apartment. He dropped his gym bag on the floor and approached Sanji, a grin on his face.

 _Don't look so happy, not right now. Not when I've just barely come to terms with the fact that my whole world just fucking shattered._

"You wouldn't believe the day I had," Zoro claimed. It was then that he did something strange. He bent down and gave Sanji a quick kiss on the cheek before he went back to the kitchen, pulling a water bottle out of the fridge.

 _What the fuck was that?_

"Huh?" asked Sanji, still in a daze. No, he was not allowed to do that! Not while Sanji was trying to mope, he couldn't give him things that made him misinterpret things, he wasn't allowed to! That went against the recovering from a broken heart rule book! Right?

"There were some real shitheads at the gym today," Zoro said. "Tried to get all up in my face. I mean sure, the day wasn't bad at Partys, but after you ran out of there like your pants were on fire— why'd you do that by the way?" Zoro asked, giving Sanji a strange look, tilting his head to the side slightly. He shook his head. "Never mind. But anyway, they were just so fucking _stupid_. They thought that cause they knew how to run on the treadmill's highest function, they were some big shot deal." He laughed. "Fucking naive bastards."

He took a seat on the couch next to Sanji, who was trying to process everything. What was going on? Wasn't last night just a fluke?

"Zoro, what are you—"

"Why isn't the TV on? Your anime's on tonight, right? Fuck, what was its name? _Fullmetal Bitch_?"

" _Alchemist_ ," Sanji corrected him. " _Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, FMA_ just plain sucks in comparison to the manga," he found himself saying. "Wait, no!"

"No what?" Zoro asked, giving him a confused look. "It's really _Fullmetal Bitch_?" He shook his head. "I thought it was a kid's show, what's with the language? I mean sure, he lost some limbs, but—"

"No! I'm not talking to you about Ed," Sanji said, shaking his head. How did he say this without sounding strange? "You just … what the fuck was that?"

"What? Me letting you watch your show?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow at him. "I'm too tired to fight over whether or not we watch your shitty animes," he said. "I thought you'd be glad about it."

"I am—"

"So what's the problem?"

"Would you stop cutting me off?!" Sanji demanded. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "Can we forget about the anime for now? What was that kiss? Why'd you kiss me?"

Zoro looked at him strangely. "I thought you knew."

"Yes because I'm a fucking mind reader! Seriously, Marimo?"

Zoro shrugged. "I kissed you cause I wanted to, got a problem with that?"

"Got a problem with that?" Sanji repeated. "Fuck yes I've got a problem with that!"

"Hey Sanji, why's the blond kid so short?"

"THIS IS NOT ABOUT ED'S INABILITY TO GROW!"

"Sanji?"

" _What_ , Zoro?"

"Your face is turning all red. Just thought you should know."

Sanji's fist curled. Honestly, he wondered why it was that he was falling in love with the moss-brained idiot. Why was he still around? He should've just packed his bags the night before, it would've saved him a lot of heartache and Tylenol. " _Ahou!_ "

Zoro stared at him in silence as though he was waiting for something, the only sign of life in him was his occasional blinking.

When Sanji's breathing went back to normal and his face returned back to its usual pasty colour, he took a deep breath.

"Hey Sanji?"

Sanji turned to him, breathing in through his nose, out through his mouth. He wouldn't freak out, he wouldn't scream. " _What_?" he asked in a clipped tone.

"You wanna bitch?"

Sanji stared at him, open mouthed. "Do I want to _what_?"

"Bitch," Zoro repeated. "Nag, complain, rant, whatever you want to call it. It's your turn, isn't it? I've already complained about my day."

Ah, that was why.

He sunk into the couch and took a deep breath. "Where … where do we stand?" he asked. He tried to mentally prepare himself for every answer Zoro could throw at him, from being friends to being complete strangers.

"Where do we stand?" Zoro repeated. "Where do you want us to stand, Curly Brow?"

"I don't care," Sanji lied. He knew what he wanted them to be, he knew exactly where he wanted to stand, but he wouldn't say it. No, not if this was just something temporary, not if Zoro was just experimenting.

Zoro nodded slowly. "Well, where do you _think_ we stand?"

"We're …" Sanji took a deep breath. "We're … friends? No, that's not right." He shook his head. They were more than that. He couldn't say they were in a relationship, but they were more than friends, weren't they? They had something deeper. "We're … fuck, I don't know, where do _you_ think we stand?"

"Me?" Zoro asked casually. "I think we're dating."

If Sanji had a glass of water, he'd have done a spit take. Since he didn't, he spat out the one thing he did have in his mouth, his cigarette. It fell on the coffee table, right next to Zoro's kicked up feet. He nearly choked on his own spit. "WHAT?!"

"Hey, does that girl always throw wrenches at him?" Zoro asked, tilting his head to the side. "Isn't that an abusive relationship?"

"Wait, back up!" Sanji said. "We're … we're dating? You think we're _dating_?"

Zoro looked at him with innocent eyes. "Don't you?"

"I … I …"

"I thought I had made it obvious," Zoro said with a shrug.

"Obvious?" Sanji repeated with wide eyes. "What the fuck do you mean it was obvious?"

"Well, I kissed you, didn't I?"

"B-but …"

"You didn't think I went around kissing people for charity, did you?" Zoro laughed before he saw the expression on Sanji's face. "Seriously?" He sighed. "Whatever. You don't have a problem with me thinking we're dating?"

"B-but …" Sanji bit his lip and knew that if he didn't speak now, Zoro would interrupt him and his point would be forever lost. "But nothing's changed! You don't act any different, it's like everything's the same as it was before! How the fuck do you call that dating?"

Zoro frowned. "Just cause we're dating, doesn't mean I have to act any different," he said. "What, do you think that means I'm entitled to act all lovey-dovey?" Just as he said this, an evil look entered his eyes. Zoro moved a little closer to Sanji on the couch. He lowered his head slightly, his breath trailing on Sanji's neck. He gave him a light kiss, sucking just a little on his collarbone. "I can be more romantic, if you'd like," he said in a soft voice, letting his hands run over Sanji's chest underneath his blazer, but the barrier of Sanji's shirt was still separating them from skin on skin contact.

"Z-Zoro …" Fuck, he'd never speak if the swordsman kept doing this!

Zoro continued, giving Sanji small kisses up his neck and back down, sucking on his pulse points just a little.

"Hmm?" he hummed against Sanji's neck.

What was he doing? Was he teasing him? Was he taunting him? What the fuck was going on? A sinking realization settled in Sanji's stomach. He closed his eyes tightly and fisted his hands which stayed still on either side of him. "Just do it," he muttered.

Zoro stopped briefly, his breath still ghosting over Sanji's pulse. "Do what?"

"Fuck me," Sanji said. "That's what you want, isn't it?"

Zoro pulled away from him and stared at him, his mouth opening and closing like a gaping fish. "W-what are you talking about?" he demanded. Sanji understood his stutter to him admitting to being found out.

"Just fuck me, isn't that what you're after?" He closed his eyes tightly. "I won't fight you," he said softly. He felt like crying so badly. "Fuck me and send me on my way, I can find somewhere to live, it won't be that hard." He sucked in a breath, biting his bottom lip. He wouldn't break down, not in front of Zoro. Zoro had already seen him at pitiful times, he didn't want to add another to his list. "Why aren't you doing it?" he asked. "Just fuck me already!"

"Sanji."

A tear slid out of Sanji's closed eyelid. Fuck, and he had been trying so hard. It wouldn't hurt this much if Zoro didn't sound so sweet, didn't sound so concerned.

"Sanji, I'm not going to sleep with you."

Sanji opened a single eye and looked at him. "What?"

"I'm not going to sleep with you," Zoro repeated. "I … I've heard what you've been through, I'm not putting you through something like that again. What the fuck do you think of me? That I'd just fuck you and leave you on the streets?" He shook his head. He lifted Sanji's head to meet his eyes. "Sanji, look at me. I'm not going to have sex with you. Not until you ask for it. Not until you tell me that you want it, that you really want to do it. Otherwise, I'll keep my hands to myself."

Sanji stared at him, confused.

"Do I want to have sex with you?" Zoro let out a low chuckle. "That's another matter all together, but I'm not going to force you into something you don't want. I'm not going to use you, I don't _want_ to use you. I just want …" Zoro trailed off. "I want a relationship with you, Sanji. I want stupid things like flowers and movie nights and someone to go out with on national holidays. I want someone to go to the fair with, someone to fight with, someone to eat my dinners with. I want all that sappy shit and I want it with _you_ , Sanji. Do you understand me? I want _you_. I don't want your body, I can wait for that, I want you to want me." He bit his lip and looked away from him. "Fuck, look at what you just did to me …"

"Do … do you mean it?" Sanji asked, scared of the answer he'd get. "That you want me?"

Zoro was blushing. It was truly adorable, as much as he tried to hide it. "Maybe …"

"Zoro."

Zoro looked at him and though he was blushing like a mad man, his eyes were dead serious. "Yes, Sanji. I want you."

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "Okay." He took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart beat. "Then you have me."

This was something new, something different, but something Sanji was willing to welcome with open arms. For as long as Zoro wanted him there.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _lilcutieprincess : I was thinking of just labeling it as "Luffy's House" but since I already said "Shit-apartment" I was like, "what do I have to lose?" Originally, I tried to write chapter 22 with a lot of quotations, but decided it was better in italics the way it was written, but the rape scene had to be written the way it was because the italics way of telling the story has Zoro sort of detached from it and it was that part that I really wanted him to react to and to show it._

 _Keitsu Han'ei: I hope you were pleased with this chapter as well. I have fun mixing genres of angst and humour and hurt and comfort, just seeing if I can pull it off. I hope I did it well!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : Thank you so much! I really appreciate it when people enjoy my writing. I've never gotten it from my parents, but it's fine, I like fanfiction, it helps me when it comes to getting other people's opinions on my writing._

 _Sabinah (x4): Yeah, uh, Sanji just kinda needed to get Zoro that sword and he was desperate and ... well it's a fanfiction, it's fictional, it works to me. Okay, about **When Harry Met Sally** , I wrote a story on fictionpress (my name is **OneShotQueen** ), called **Of Private Jets, Grease & Patrick Swayze,** which uses **Grease** , **Dirty Dancing** and **When Harry Met Sally** as the real references for everything. I would recommend reading it, just cause I thought it was fun to write and adorable. Oh God, you just gave me an idea for a Zoro and Sanji story where they're both soccer players (football, I'm Canadian, which means American terms float to me. I got so confused when we read this book in school about this guy who played football (England style) and he was using it as a floatation device cause he nearly drowned and I was imagining a soccer ball until I was like, "Oh wait! That's wrong!" As for Moodie, I just considered things and figured she'd be one of those people who don't want to show their nervousness, but its still obvious anyway. One of those people who are all talk, no do, but in a good way. Kind of like, she WILL talk to her father about the marriage and all that, but because of her appearance, you wouldn't really believe her. I like to think Moodie's a strong person, that she could stand up for herself._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : Do I listen to Skillet? Oh Dear God, you have no idea how much I love that stuff! I had to introduce my brother to Three Days Grace and he was like, "this shit fucking rocks!" and I was like, "You are so deprived", cause he's older than me by a lot, so he listened to old stuff, like I don't know, Black Crowes or something (it pisses me off that they didn't spell crows right) and he thought that was hardcore stuff and I was like, "Um, no. No."_

 _Alright Zoro said, "Would you like to go out with me?"_

 _And yes, it was 2004 summer Olympics that were held in Greece._

 _Okay let's see, my question this time? Okay, while Sanji and Zoro were speaking about **Fullmetal Alchemist** , Zoro made a reference to a film. My friend watched it on a long plane ride and was like, "ED?!" Here's a little hint to it cause it's an American film and I did some looking on some reviewers profiles and realize there are some from Denmark, Malaysia and other exotic places (watching Japanese TV and finding out that they think Canada is exotic ... I felt somewhat flattered). The film stars Tom Cruise and was released in 2014. It goes by two different names. If you can tell me them both, I'll be really happy. _

_So in translation, I hope you liked this chapter. i hope I didn't screw up Zoro and Sanji's relationship and that you'll still stick around! Anyway, please review, no flames, and I'll update when I can. School starts in three weeks, so when we hit September, I think my updates will become weekly rather than practically daily._

* * *

 **1st Edit: September 20th 2015**


	25. Iridescent

_**Author's Note:** So I'll be honest, this chapter's a bit weird. First of all, I read **Flipped** a long time ago and you know how sometimes when you read a book, a quote just sticks to you like glue? This quote was one of them. I wanted to dedicate a chapter to Zoro trying to prove to Sanji that he was worth while. This chapter was inspired by two things: one, being that I read a story in which a boy started to go out with this other guy, but this guy was really insecure, and it wasn't that he was humble or anything cause he knew exactly what parts of him people liked and how to get others to do what he wanted, but he had this genuine fear that he was disgusting. In one chapter, his boyfriend started to kiss him and let his hands go underneath his shirt. The guy froze up entirely and stopped breathing entirely. He started to cry when his boyfriend pressed him further and then his boyfriend spent the rest of their relationship trying to prove to this guy that he was worth it and he was beautiful. It was a wonderful story. But anyway, the second inspiration: I got bored one day and me and my friend decided to play a complimenting game. She got pissed at me when I said two compliments and she realized she had to give me two compliments to make the compliments even and then she just said, "You're the worst!" and I was like, "That's not a compliment" and she said, "it can be seen as a good thing!" which was my response to why I told her being stubborn can be seen as a good thing. I don't own **One Piece** , I know that the conversation with Nami at the beginning is weird, I know, but I kept it anyway cause I loved it. And as for Zoro ... It was kind of risky writing it, but for some reason, while I'm not into BDSM or anything like that, dirty talk is this thing that I don't mind. Don't even ask me why._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter: the following things are present in this chapter o _f Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Hints of past abuse (really hard to see)**

 **Zoro's dirty mouth**

* * *

Chapter 25: Iridescent

 _"Some of us get dipped in flat, some in satin, some in gloss…. But every once in a while, you find someone who's iridescent, and when you do, nothing will ever compare."-_ Wendelin Van Draanen, _Flipped_

* * *

"You had sex."

Zoro rolled his eyes, taking a seat across from Nami and ignoring the sounds of aggressive punching from the two fighters who were in the middle of their match. "Wrong," he told her. "Couldn't be more wrong."

"You're glowing though," Nami accused him. "That's not just any ordinary glow either, that's the 'I just fucked the brains out of someone and am still in orgasmic heaven' glow!"

Zoro shook his head. "I ate pancakes this morning, Sanji's pancakes," he specified. "Maybe that's why."

"I don't think so."

"Nami, you've had his food. You know it's climax worthy," he told her.

She nodded, as though to concede to Zoro's point when another thing occurred to her. "You have Sanji's food for breakfast all the time, that doesn't explain your glow! I'm swear, you had sex, didn't you?!"

"Nami," Zoro said in a deadly serious voice, "I did not fuck anyone."

"But did you _get_ fucked?"

"What on Earth are you talking about?"

"I know how gay sex works," she said. "It's anal and since you both have cocks, you can fuck each other."

"If you wore a strap-on, you could fuck Luffy just as easily," Zoro told her. He froze. "What's with that look in your eyes?"

"Nothing," Nami said in a voice that quite clearly said it was _not_ nothing, but Zoro decided he didn't want to understand the inner workings of Nami's mind. They were better left a secret. "Okay fine, let's say hypothetically you _didn't_ have sex—"

"Which I _didn't_."

"— why are you glowing?"

Zoro snorted. "I'm not glowing."

"Liar." Nami grabbed Luffy's arm just as he passed by their table. "Luffy, is Zoro glowing?"

Zoro rolled his eyes but Luffy actually looked at Zoro, rather thoroughly too. "Yeah," he said. "So you got laid last night?"

"Why does everyone think that?!"

"You're glowing," Nami said.

"Say I _am_ glowing, hypothetically—"

"Which you are."

"— who says it's a sex glow?"

Nami sighed as though she couldn't stand Zoro's questions. "Luffy, is it a sex glow?"

Luffy nodded. He gave Nami a kiss on the forehead and let go of her hand. "I've gotta go, I've got a fight right after these people." He gestured towards the brutes who were fighting each other. "Wish me luck."

"Good luck, Captain," Nami said, pulling him by his shirt to give him a quick kiss. "I'll be betting on you."

Luffy grinned.

With that, the straw hat went off to fight, wearing a rather stupid smile on his face. Oh who was Zoro kidding? Luffy _always_ had a stupid smile on his face.

"Okay, if you didn't have sex, then something else happened," Nami conceded. "Something to do with Sanji." Zoro said nothing. "Sanji and kissing?" Zoro turned his head away. "You know I can still see you blushing, Marimo."

"Don't call me that," Zoro snapped through gritted teeth.

"Sanji calls you that."

"Yeah well he's …" Zoro searched for a word. "Different."

"You mean special."

"Whatever makes you happy, bookie."

Nami grinned. "You kissed Sanji, didn't you? And something came out of that, right? Oh my God, Zoro, are you dating Sanji?!"

"Keep your voice down!" Zoro snapped, looking left and right as though scared someone would pop out of the shadows.

"It's no big deal," Nami said, rolling her eyes. "Not everyone here's interested in your love live, Roronoa." She grinned and leaned onto the table, resting her head in her hands. She bat her eyelashes. "So …?"

"So what?" Zoro asked. "And stop that, it's not cute, it's creepy. Looks like you have gunk in your eye and you're trying to get it out. It doesn't look attractive in the least."

She rolled her eyes. "Like I care about that. So you guys are dating, huh?"

"Maybe …"

"In your language, that means yes. So how is it?" Nami asked. "You guys seem to have so much chemistry, did it just like, explode and you ripped each other's clothes off?" She whistled and fanned herself. "God that'd be hot."

"Does your boyfriend know you have a gay fetish?"

"It's not a fetish."

"Okay sure, fujoshi." Zoro sighed. "I don't see how it's any of your business anyway." He shook his head. "We still haven't gotten everything figured out yet," he said softly. "There are still some … complications."

"Complications?"

Zoro bit his bottom lip. "Nami, what do you think of Sanji?"

Nami looked slightly taken aback. "What do I think of Sanji?" She paused as though she was thinking. "I think he's a nice man, very polite. He's got good manners, even if he has a foul mouth. He's a good man." She gave Zoro a funny look. "Where are you going with this?"

"What about physically? What do you think of him physically?"

"He's handsome," replied Nami. "Nice long legs, not a bad dresser either. He's got smooth hands too …" She trailed off, as though in a different world with a big grin on her face.

"You have a promise ring, remember?"

"I know that!"

"So in short, you think he's attractive," Zoro said slowly.

"Well yeah, he's gorgeous!"

"So you don't think he's ugly?"

"For goodness sake Zoro, you're dating a fucking Adonis!" She saw the worried expression on Zoro's face when she said this. "What's this about?"

Zoro bit his bottom lip. "It's just …" He shook his head. "I don't think he realizes he does it, but … Whenever I hug him or just put my arms around him, he … he sucks in his breath. Fuck, Nami, he sucks in his breath and he won't _fucking breathe_ until I let him go." Zoro shook his head. "He …" Zoro's hands began to unconsciously shake. Fuck those cooks, what they did to Sanji … Just thinking about it made his blood run cold.

"Zoro, do you think Sanji sees himself as—"

"No," Zoro said immediately. As much as he hated to remember the look on Sanji's face when he told Zoro he was a train-wreck, he said he was a skinny. He said you could see his bones. He knew he wasn't fat, _he knew that_. So why did he tense whenever Zoro tried to hold him? Was it Zoro? Did he make him uncomfortable? No, Sanji would tell him if that was it. What was it then? Fuck, _he wanted to know._ He wanted to know so he could fix this mess and Sanji wouldn't have to worry anymore. Was he ashamed of himself? Of his appearance?

It was too late to back out now, not that Zoro wanted to. He didn't regret falling for Sanji, he was still falling. He wouldn't say he was in love with him, not just yet, but he was on the brink, he was almost there, he could taste it on his tongue.

 _I need to fix this. How do I … how do I convince him? How do I get him to see him the way I do?_ He sighed and let his head hit the table, running his hands through his hair. "I'm not cut out for this shit," he muttered. "I am so _not_ cut out for this …"

There was a loud smack that forced Zoro's head up. He saw Nami, her fist clenched. She had hit the table. "Who the fuck are you?" she demanded.

"Z-Zoro Roronoa," Zoro said stupidly.

"What?" Nami asked. "I can't hear you."

"Zoro Roronoa," Zoro repeated, louder this time.

"What?"

"I'M NOT FUCKING SCREAMING MY NAME TO YOU!"

The entire bar fell silent. Luffy in the middle of punching his opponent froze momentarily. "Oh fuck, not this again," Zoro sighed. He shook his head. "What are you looking at?" he snapped at everyone before turning back to Nami. "The whole bar thinks I'm crazy thanks to you."

"They already thought that," Nami said, "it's no big loss. But seriously, you're Zoro Roronoa, kendo champ, kenjutsu master!"

"I wouldn't say _master_ exactly …"

"Cut the bullshit," Nami said. "Anyway, you're a martial arts genius, a prodigy in sword fighting. Surely you can figure this out, can't you?"

"I'm not Superman! What do I know? I swing a sword? I can't cut down his inner demons," Zoro said. "No matter how much I want to."

Nami stared at him.

"What?"

"You … you can be really sweet when you want to be," Nami said softly. "Sanji's a lucky man."

"He'd be ten times luckier if I could figure out how to get rid of those fucking delusions of his," Zoro muttered. He sighed. He was so going to regret doing this, but he decided to do it anyway. "Hey Nami? What would you do if someone you knew had low self-esteem?"

Nami blinked. "Are you asking me for advice?"

"Look, can you give me an answer or not?"

"You are! Zoro Roronoa is asking me for advice!" She laughed. "Oh God, this is great!"

Zoro stood up and pushed back in his chair. "If you're going to laugh at me, I can go elsewhere. You're not the only one I can try to get advice from."

"You don't know how to help him?" Nami asked.

"Duh, that's why I'm asking you," Zoro said in a huff. God, he was never asking the woman for advice ever again.

"It's obvious, isn't it?" She shook her head. "You just compliment him. Tell him things you like about him, boost his ego."

"How the fuck do I do that?"

"You're the one who's dating him," Nami reminded him.

"Why is this so fucking hard?" Zoro muttered. "Compliment him?" He shook his head. "Fuck, on what?"

"You're dating him, you have to like _something_ about the man. Didn't we already go over this?" She shook her head. "You're unbelievable. I'm sure you'll figure something out, you're not _that_ stupid."

* * *

Correction: Zoro _was_ that stupid.

The moment he got back to the apartment, he told Sanji to brace himself cause Zoro wanted to fight.

Fighting cleared his mind, as weird as that sounded. He grabbed his swords and couldn't help but feel a sense of pride at owning Shusui. It was Sanji's gift to him. Surely Zoro could figure something out, couldn't he? He could figure out a way to compliment the cook, right? Well, what did he like about Sanji anyways?

Sanji stood across from him, hands stuffed in his pocket as usual.

"Eyes," Zoro muttered under his breath. He really did like Sanji's eyes. Well, _eye_. It wasn't his fault Sanji's fucking hairstyle wouldn't let him see both of his eyes.

Sanji gave him a strange look, but he quickly recovered and went to deliver a blow to Zoro's chest. Zoro dodged and thought a little harder. What else did he like about Sanji? "Skin," he mumbled. Sanji just seemed so … sensitive to him. The way he had reacted to Zoro's fingers, it drove him absolutely insane. Sanji frowned, blocking Zoro's dual swords attack with his foot.

"What are you muttering about?" he asked.

"Legs …"

Block.

"What the fuck, Marimo?"

Parry.

"Hands."

Lunge.

"Answer me, dammit, you bastard!"

Zoro ducked to avoid a kick to the head and instead, tried to kick him in the ankle. The cook dodged his attack and sent a glare in his direction. "What the fuck are you doing, idiot swordsman?"

"Voice," Zoro said a little louder. "Definitely."

Sanji frowned, a harsh kick coming to hit Zoro in the side. He tried to avoid it, but he missed. He staggered back, taking a moment to regain his bearings. "Hips."

The more things Zoro seemed to say, the more pissed Sanji seemed to get. After vaguely mumbling other things, such as "hair" (he received a roundhouse kick for this), "lips" (for this, he nearly lost his balls) and "flexibility" (a harsh kick to the gut that was unavoidable, no matter how Zoro bent himself), what really set Sanji off was when Zoro muttered "eyebrows".

Almost immediately, Zoro got a kick to the face.

Zoro was pretty sure his nose had just been broken, but instead of worrying about that, he looked up at Sanji from the floor. Giving only half of his attention towards a fight with Sanji was a dangerous thing to do. Though, it wasn't as though he wasn't thinking about Sanji while he was getting his ass kicked by Sanji. The blond looked pissed, his fists curled. He would've thought Sanji would punch him, but he didn't. Instead, his fingers merely curled and uncurled, flexing. He stared at the ground for a moment before harshly kicking Zoro in the head once more. With that, he grabbed his blazer off the couch and left the apartment, closing the door with a loud _SLAM_!

Zoro sat in the empty apartment, the sound of the door shutting still ringing in his ears. He only knew one thing.

 _I fucked up again, didn't I?_

* * *

"What did you do to Sanji?"

Zoro sighed. "If I knew that, I wouldn't be asking you," he growled.

Nami sighed and crossed her arms. "You can't think of any reason you pissed Sanji off?"

"None."

Clearly, this wasn't the right answer.

"Zoro Roronoa, you better contemplate on what you did and fix it!" Her eyes turned a tad sad. "And after what you told me this morning …" She trailed off.

Zoro froze and sat up straighter. "You know, don't you? Why Sanji's pissed at me?"

Nami threw her hands up in the air. "Of course I know!"

"So?"

"So what?" she snapped.

"So tell me what I did wrong!"

Nami shook her head. "It doesn't matter that I know what you did wrong, it matters that you figure it out yourself what you did wrong. Otherwise, where's the lesson in that?"

"Look, the guy I'm in a relationship with is now completely and totally pissed at me and I don't have a fucking clue why! At least give me a hint, I can't do anything if I don't know!"

"You should know why he's pissed at you—"

"Well I don't and there's no changing that unless you fucking tell me!"

Nami sighed. "Sanji came by a while ago and he asked me if it was common for you to be muttering things to yourself. I told him he should know, since he lived with you, but he insisted I tell him. I said you didn't do it often, only when you were really concentrating on something. You fought with him earlier, didn't you?" Nami shook her head. "What were you saying? Under your breath and all?"

"I was …" Zoro bit his lip. "I was complimenting him." He paused. "Sort of."

"What do you mean 'sort of'?" Nami asked. "Either you were complimenting him, or you weren't."

"I don't know! I was just thinking about what I liked about him and I guess my thoughts just kind of … came out."

"Did he _know_ you were listing things you liked about him?"

Zoro froze. "Wait, don't tell me—"

"Fix this Zoro. I don't know much about Sanji's past, but I can tell he's been through hell before. If you hurt him, I swear, I'll kill you." Nami had that look on her face that said she meant business and that she would dismember him if he ever did hurt Sanji. "He doesn't deserve to hurt like this."

Zoro knew that. He knew that more than anyone.

* * *

"Let's play a game."

Sanji looked up from his dinner and stared at Zoro. "What?"

"Let's play a game. You always play games with me, this time I propose a game."

Sanji gave him a strange look. "What kind of game?"

"We're going to play a complimenting game," Zoro said. "You compliment me and then I give you a compliment. We can't repeat compliments we've already said to each other and the first one to run out of compliments loses."

Sanji frowned. "You're going to lose, you know."

"You think I can't think of enough things?" Zoro teased. "Come on, humour me. Let's play. Oh yeah and another thing, you need to explain why you find what you said is a compliment. Just in case it isn't self-explanatory."

"That isn't a game, that's an ego boost."

"So? It doesn't hurt to inflate someone's ego a bit."

Sanji frowned and looked down at his meal. "You sure you want to play?"

"Yeah." Zoro took a bite out of his food. "Do you want to start?"

Sanji sighed. "Okay."

He seemed reluctant to play. Probably because he thought that this would hardly do him any good. Zoro wasn't stupid, he could see the slight crease in Sanji's forehead that he got when he was a little upset over something but didn't want to say anything. He waited for Sanji to start. Zoro knew playing this game one-sidedly— having Zoro say all of his compliments to Sanji without interruption— would surely never pass with the blond. He'd say Zoro was just trying to boost his confidence, seeing things that weren't there. This way, at least Sanji would think Zoro had _some_ credibility.

"You going to start?" Zoro pressed.

"I'm thinking," Sanji snapped back.

"Is it really that hard to think of something you like about me?"

"Do I have to stick to anything in particular? Like, can I only compliment on physical things, or things like personality or something?"

"Anything is fair game," Zoro said. "But the only thing you can't do is repeat a compliment. Say, I dunno, say you tell me you like my earrings, or, some shit like that, you're not allowed to say you like my earrings again. I'm allowed to tell you I like your earrings though, since I haven't said it yet. If you wore earrings, that is," he added quickly.

"You suck at explaining games," Sanji told him.

"That's not a compliment."

"Fine." Sanji bit his lip and thought for a moment. "Your commitment towards your sword fighting."

Zoro waited. When Sanji didn't seem ready to tell him anything more, he said, "Elaborate. You have to elaborate on everything, in case the compliment isn't clear."

"What the fuck isn't clear about liking your commitment?"

"Come on, humour me."

Sanji grumbled some curse words under his breath for a moment before sighing. "Okay. I like your commitment towards kenjutsu because … because you rarely see it now a days. You're always out at the gym, or at Partys, practicing. Lots of people would quit, but you've got this goal —don't think I haven't heard Usopp going off about how you want to beat this Mihawk guy— and you won't rest until you reach it. Most people would've given up by now, but you're still up for it. In fact, I think the longer it takes you, the more you want to beat him." Sanji shook his head. "I don't know, you have this fire in your eyes when you're fighting, like you won't accept defeat. It's serious commitment and I appreciate that you have it towards something that you love."

Zoro nodded slowly, unable to hold back his grin, but he tried to hide it anyway.

"Oh shut it," Sanji snapped. "I told you, this is just boosting your ego."

"It's my turn," Zoro reminded him.

"Good luck," Sanji muttered.

What did Zoro want to say? Where should he start? Hmm … "Your passion for cooking," Zoro decided. "Your eyes just totally light up when you're in the kitchen. Have you ever seen yourself cook?"

"That'd be kind of hard," Sanji said with a light chuckle.

"I should video tape you next time. You just … it's in everything you do when you're in the kitchen. You just totally lose yourself in it, which is the main reason why I still don't know how to make shit. It's the way you take it so seriously, you're like a perfectionist when it comes to cooking. I can tell you're really doing what you love when you cook. You put everything into every meal you ever serve and maybe that's why your meals are better than anyone else's."

Sanji blushed, looking down at his plate. "I'm not the only passionate cook in the world you know."

"And I'm not the only committed swordsman," Zoro pointed out. "Your turn."

Sanji was still blushing when he gave Zoro his next answer. "You're stubborn. Remarkably stubborn." He had a ghost of a smile on his face as he spoke. "I wouldn't be here if you weren't. You're very persistent—"

"Wouldn't most people call that annoying?"

"Not when they need it as desperately as I did," Sanji said. "I'm glad you came when you did. I don't … I don't know where I'd be without you, what I'd be doing. Maybe I'd be lying dead in some alleyway …" Sanji let out a short laugh but Zoro knew there was nothing funny about the cook's comment. "You were the intervention I needed, I guess and I just didn't realize it. You were the catalyst that pushed me forward."

"That's what catalysts tend to do you know," Zoro said, giving him a small smile.

"I don't think I ever thanked you—"

"Don't," Zoro cut him off. "I don't want your thankfulness." He shook his head. "It was nothing, really."

"That's a lie," Sanji said. "Looking after more than just yourself, that's—"

"Look, as much as I may have affected your life, you've affected mine just as much, if not more," Zoro cut him off. "That's just what happens when people get into a relationship," he said with a shrug. "It happens with everyone. I met Luffy, I changed a bit. I met Nami, changed a bit then too. I have to say though, you've probably made the biggest impact on my life in such a short amount of time. Now, shall I build up your ego? It's my turn."

Sanji didn't say anything in protest, but from the grim look on his face, he didn't seem certain Zoro could produce another thing he liked about Sanji.

"Okay. Your clothes. I really like them. Don't even ask me why, but that blazer makes you look really sophisticated. Where'd you get the golden buttons anyway?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "That doesn't really matter, it was just another thing Zeff got for me at one point. Had it since I was nineteen."

"And it still fits?"

"Yeah," Sanji said in a soft voice. He shook his head, as though trying to get rid of some of his thoughts before continuing. "Your earrings." Zoro raised an eyebrow and Sanji shrugged. "Don't ask, I don't know why. They're just …" He reached across the table, letting his fingers gently skim over the golden hoops, sending shivers down Zoro's spine. "I don't even know. I'm not a big fan of jewellery on men, earrings seem so … impractical, you know what I mean? But they suit you. I know they should probably make you look fierce and intimidating, but I don't think they do. Not to me at least. They just … complete the whole look."

"The whole look?"

"The Zoro Roronoa-chic style," Sanji said with a shrug. "I just can't imagine you without them and I kind of don't want to." He cleared his throat, as though he felt awkward. "Anyway, your turn."

"When you swear, I really like it," Zoro said with a smirk.

"Huh?"

"There's just something about it that I can't quite place my finger on. Maybe I just like dirty talk."

"Dirty talk?" Sanji squeaked.

"Yeah," Zoro said. "You know, like …" Zoro thought for a moment. He was in a relationship with Sanji, that meant he was allowed to tease him, didn't it? He licked his lips as an idea formed. "My cock's so hard for you right now. You like it, don't you? Feeling my big cock moving inside you? It makes you hot, doesn't it? You like it when I fuck you." With each sentence Zoro spoke, Sanji turned a deeper shade of red. The swordsman leaned across the table, supporting himself on his hands which were on the counter, whispering in Sanji's ear. "I'm so fucking hard for you right now," he said softly. "So horny. Fuck me, won't you?" Zoro pulled away slightly, looking down at Sanji. He smirked. "Seems like you like it too."

"Fuck, no!" Sanji snapped at him, turning his head away and crossing his legs. He shook his head. "T-that's not it, it's just … it's different when you say it," he said quietly.

"Different?"

"Yeah," Sanji said quietly. "Patty and Carne, they …"

 _Oh fuck, did I bring up bad memories by accident?_ Was he a fucking moron or something? "I'm sorry, should I have not done that?" he asked Sanji softly.

"No, that's not it either …" He bit his bottom lip. "I don't know why but … It's just not the same when you do it. I don't … I don't feel as dirty when you talk like that."

"Why do you think that is?" Zoro asked, honestly curious.

"How the fuck am I suppose to know?"

"What, so you like it?" Zoro smirked. "Like a fucking slut, aren't you?" He saw the moment Sanji tensed. He stopped immediately. "That's why, isn't it?" he asked. "You don't like that word, do you?"

"N-not really," Sanji said quietly.

"It's fine, I just won't say it. Besides, we've already gone over this. You aren't a slut. Not in the very least. I'd almost call you prude." He gave Sanji a small smile. "So yeah," he said, moving to a different topic. Hopefully it would make Sanji relax. "I like your dirty mouth."

"But I don't say anything like that!" Sanji spluttered. "How do you … how does that translate to …" Sanji blushed even more, unable to fishing his sentence.

"I don't know," Zoro said with a shrug. "I think I might just have a kink for it." He gave Sanji a look that clearly said, 'what can you do?' and got back into his chair. "Your turn."

"R-right." Sanji seemed slightly out of it and Zoro was pleased to see he was flustered. "Um, okay. I like the way you treat your swords. You act like they're the most precious thing to you, they're your treasures, aren't they?" Sanji asked. "I don't know, I think you take better care of your swords than yourself sometimes. You just seem like one of those guys who credits his strength towards his swords as well as his own skills, unlike others who'll say it's them that's amazing. You … if swords were people, I swear they'd fall in love with you. You treat them with so much respect, if that even makes sense."

"Even Shusui?"

Sanji gave him a strange look. "What?"

"You said they'd all fall in love with me. Even Shusui?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Are we really going to talk about your swords as though they're animate objects?"

"They might be," Zoro said with a shrug. "They could be like those weird toys you hear about in fairy tales that come to life when your back is turned." He grinned. "Okay, it's my turn." He reached across the table and gently took one of Sanji's hands into his own. "Your hands. I really like them— no, I _love_ your hands."

"What, so I can cook you food?" Sanji asked with a smirk.

"No, for tons of reasons, none of which have to do with your cooking. Like say, you couldn't smoke if you injured one of your hands." Zoro paused. "Then again, knowing you, you'd figure it out somehow. We wouldn't be able to fight over the remote if you suddenly couldn't use your hands. You couldn't grab my hair like you do," Zoro said, making Sanji blush, "or this," he said, running his thumb over Sanji's knuckles. "And yeah, you wouldn't be able to cook either, which would be kinda shitty," he added with a grin.

Sanji pulled his hand away, laughing. "Of course, it always comes back to the food, doesn't it?" He rolled his eyes before biting his lip. "I like the way you fight with everything you have," Sanji said. "It's so … you have so much power and confidence when you fight. I don't know, I just feel like when you fight, you're always on the offensive while your opponent has to be on the defence, without a single opening—"

"Hey, I need to defend myself plenty when I fight you," Zoro said with a small laugh.

"Yeah, well …" Sanji shrugged. "You just have this graceful way of fighting. You make it look so easy …"

"I might just want to teach you how to fight with some swords," Zoro said. "I think you'd be good at it. You handle the knives pretty well."

"Knives and swords are not the same thing," Sanji reminded him.

"Maybe not, but they're both sharp and can cut someone down, can't they?"

"So can your words," Sanji said teasingly, but the look in his eyes said he himself had been cut down several times by words alone and this was no joke.

"I like your hair," Zoro said, reaching across the table in an attempt to brush aside Sanji's bangs. Sanji backed away from him and Zoro pulled his hand back, chuckling softly. "I think it's unique. I don't know many blonds. In fact, I'm sure I could count them all on a single hand. It's something different from the norm."

"I've been made fun of for it," Sanji said softly.

"Well they're bastards. That's the way it always is, isn't it? I've been given shit about my hair too. I got yelled at in school cause they thought I dyed it and when they found out it was natural, they got even more pissed and told me I had to dye it." He shrugged. "That's how people are. They see something different, something that's not the average and they get scared. They get scared and instead of confronting their fear, they try to crush it, make it disappear so they don't have to face it."

"Does … does it scare you?"

"Sanji, I love your hair," Zoro told him sincerely.

"Do you even hear half of the bullshit that you're saying?" Sanji shook his head. "God …" He trailed off.

"It's your turn," Zoro said.

"I know that!" Sanji bit his bottom lip for a moment. "Your tan. I don't know, I know a lot of pale people but you just seem so tanned naturally, to the point where it's _un_ natural." He shrugged. "It's subtle, but it's obvious at the same time. You're tanned, but you're not overly-tanned that it looks like it came from some cheap spray bottle."

"Your voice."

"My voice?"

"I like hearing your voice," Zoro said. "I think it's the pitch or tone of it, or something technical like that, but I really like the sound of your voice. It's like … it's like the kind of voice that you could drown in, the kind of voice you want to make love to."

Sanji coughed, turning his head away. He was totally a tomato. "You called me old school? Who uses the term 'make love' anymore?"

"Fine, hearing your voice makes me want to fuck it," Zoro said. "You know what? I think that sounds even kinkier."

"You're such a pervert!" Sanji snapped. He seemed to be trying to get the colour out of his face but it didn't seem to be working. "Um … your hair," he said finally. "It doesn't look soft, but it kind of is. Just a tad prickly, otherwise it's totally soft." He shrugged. "I like it."

Zoro grinned. "Your eyes. I love your eyes. They're just … do you know they remind me of the ocean?" He smiled. "They remind me of the sea. When the waves are calm and also when they're choppy and crazy and send sailors' to their deaths, plummeting to the deep depths of the ocean. You said your eyes didn't have any depth to them. You're wrong Sanji, you've never been more wrong."

"I like your eyes too," Sanji said softly. "They're … they're a very unique colour, did you know? I thought they were grey, but they're not. They have this hazel colour too, it's like a kaleidoscope."

"Those things make me dizzy," Zoro said in a soft voice, matching Sanji's tone.

"So do your eyes."

Zoro wasn't sure if Sanji realized what he had said, but he decided not to mention in, for fear that Sanji would take it back. "Your eyebrows," Zoro said. "Don't explode on me, I swear. It's weird but … I really like your eyebrows. They're fucked up, I know, but like you said about my earrings, it'd be weird if you didn't have them. They just … I don't know, I like them. Don't get me wrong though, I do think they're still the most fucked up thing I've ever seen, but I don't know, I've just … gotten used to them I suppose?" He shrugged. "Your turn."

"Um …" Sanji seemed deep in thought.

Zoro smirked. "Running out of things already?"

"No!" Sanji snapped. As much as this game seemed to embarrass him, he seemed to still be stuck on winning. "I like the way you try to help Nami stop gambling. It's just very … considerate, you know? You don't give off the impression you're a good guy, but you really are. And I think it's sweet that you want to help her."

"Yeah, tell her that, the fucking bitch," Zoro muttered, much to Sanji's amusement. "Your legs," Zoro said. "I love your legs. They're so long …"

"Isn't it disgusting?" Sanji asked. "My limbs seem too long for my body."

"You know, I wonder how I didn't know I was gay before you. I'm more of an ass and leg man," he said. "I swear, girls would kill to have your legs. So powerful, so strong … They're your strength, aren't they? And besides, long legs are fucking sexy, don't you know?"

"Your muscles," Sanji blurted out.

"My muscles?" Zoro repeated.

"Yeah," Sanji said, clearly embarrassed. "They're not bulgy and weird, they're like … they're like your tan. They're there, you can't deny them, but they aren't excessive. They make you look strong, but you don't look overly-muscular." He shrugged. "You're more finely toned or something like that. Fuck, I don't know, you have abs!"

 _Can he turn any redder?_

"Your skin," Zoro said. "You're very sensitive, did you know?" he asked, gently caressing Sanji's cheek before letting go. "I like how you're sensitive, how you seem to just be so aware of everything and anything that touches you …" He trailed off. "Plus, you have really smooth skin."

"I like your smile," Sanji decided. "It's … I don't know, you don't smile a lot, did you know?"

"You don't either," Zoro reminded him.

"Yeah well, I don't know, you just smile in this way that … It's just different from seeing others smile. It's genuine."

"Your strength," Zoro declared. "You are so strong Sanji, did you know?" He reached for Sanji's hand again, this time holding it palm facing the ceiling. His fingers brushed against the faint white scars across his wrists before feeling every callus on his hand. "You're so strong. You've been through so much and you're still here, you're still breathing. That you lasted so long, that you still haven't given up yet …" He trailed off. "You're amazing, you know? Patty, Carne, I could probably never brave through that. I might be strong, but I'm only that way because I have others I can fall back to when it gets bad. You've been strong for so long on your own … And I know its hurt you, I know that, but … God Sanji, you really don't know how beautiful you are, do you?" He raised his hand to Sanji's face, still holding onto his hand with his other. He let his fingers trace the contours of Sanji's lips, watching as they parted slowly. "It has to be a sin," he said softly. "You're so, so beautiful …"

And then Zoro kissed him.

The dinner was long forgotten— it had probably gone cold anyway— and now all Zoro was focusing on was the feel of Sanji's lips against his own. Hearing the small sounds he made, the small intakes of breath, the soft, quiet gasp that was almost impossible to hear. He was so glad he was able to do this, that he was able to be like this with Sanji.

Sanji pressed against him a little more and Zoro gently bit Sanji's bottom lip. He let out a gasp and Zoro slowly entered his mouth. He tried to pull him closer, but he knew that even if they were pressed against each other without even a trace of air between them, it still wouldn't be close enough. Not for him.

It was when he couldn't breathe anymore that he finally let him go.

"I like your lips," said Zoro softly. "I win."

* * *

The next morning, Sanji woke to a piece of paper which was stuck to his forehead. It read:

 _Curly Brow, don't expect me to be all sentimental and shit like I was last night all the time. But just in case you're a fucking moron or get amnesia or something, I've made you a list so you don't forget._

And then the paper proceeded to list all of the things Zoro had complimented him on the night before, along with many others he hadn't mentioned.

Sanji never lost the paper. Ever.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** the thank-yous!_

 _S.P. Tripathi: Okay so uh, yeah, I kinda screwed up before. The movie's a Tom Cruise movie, not a Tom Hanks movie ... haha ... haha ... I changed it after you sent your reply. Sorry about that. I haven't heard from you in so long! And I know, fanficiton is weird and doesn't bold things anymore. If you go on the mobile site, it'll leave things bolded, on the full site it won't. I read on the mobile just cause it's easier for me._

 _JustCallMeLucie : Okay as long as your sister's fine with swearing. I don't swear myself, but I feel as though I'm letting out all the swear words I would say through these guys. Swearing, but not swearing aloud. Writing that scene with Sanji I was just thinking it was totally logical for him to act like that, to think that, considering his life and stuff, so I made him do it. Which lead to Zoro's somewhat sappy speech._

 _Dyola : Yup, same here. Love Brotherhood. Me and my friend came up with drinking games for some of our favourite animes (not that we're legal to drink yet. Almost there, but I've already sworn off contaminating my body so ...) and we did one for **Fullmetal Alchemist.** We considered both shows and were like, "well, you NEED to take a shot every time Ed says he's not short and when people confuse his brother with him" and then I said I needed a shot every time I got confused about Envy's gender and then we both said, "Every time you have no fucking clue who the antagonist is" cause we were just so confused about it. Just when we thought we knew who it was, they threw something at us and we totally blanked._

 _Okay, the movie is a Tom Cruise movie called **Edge of Tomorrow,** also called **Live, Die, Repeat,** about this officer who goes and relives this day over and over again. There's this warrior who they called "Fullmetal Bitch" and it was spray painted onto this moving train or something and every time he woke up, he'd see it pass by him. My friend had a heart attack every time that happened. I don't want to sound whiny, but I'm hoping for five reviews before my next update ..._

 _Another thing: my friend started watching **Blue Exorcist** and decided she wants to take me to Comic Con with her. She decided I have to be Rin, which means I need blue flames and an awesome sword, which is great, but my school uniform already forces me to wear a tie and now I have to wear another one! My brother says he knows a place where I can get a sword for 40 bucks though, so I think it's all good._

 _Now my question for you all: While I was writing this chapter, I had a few specific things I wanted Zoro to explain to Sanji about why he liked him, but in order to do that, since they were going back and forth, Sanji needed at least the same amount of things he liked about Zoro. Since I spent so much time tearing Sanji down in his own explanation, I for some reason, had trouble thinking of things that Sanji liked about Zoro. So here's my question, **if you played this complimenting game with Zoro, what compliments would you give him?**_


	26. A Gift To A Swordsman

_**Author's Note:** Okay, uh, first, I've never written anything like this, so go easy on me. I also did lots of research on flowers for the sake of this chapter and I know that people said they'd either go to Luffy or Usopp for advice and since I've mainly been having Nami help them (because it's very amusing for me), I decided to give Usopp the show this time. Also since I barely put him in here. I'm just better at writing about Nami, Luffy, Zoro and Sanji and that's the main reason for the whole limiting the cast. Now you'll see in the warnings that there's some sexual content in this chapter. I'll be marking it with the break thingy that Fanfiction provides and it'll appear again when it's over. I don't own **One Piece**. Also, I'm asking now and I'll ask at the end. There's a character in this chapter who is not part of **One Piece** at all, but who is not an original character either. Can you tell me where he's from? I omitted his name, but I left tons of hints. Which means I don't own him._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS, the following things are present in this chapter o _f Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Um, we've finally gotten some sexual content that's consensual.**

* * *

Chapter 26: A Gift To A Swordsman

* * *

Zoro was not allowed to do that.

He wasn't allowed to be remarkably sweet one day and make Sanji feel indebted to him. As though taking him in hadn't already made Sanji feel as though he owned the swordsman just about everything, including his life, for his little act on his hero complex. It wasn't his fault that the green-haired Marimo had an obsession with saving people. On his desk, there was now a list written in Zoro's messy handwriting, naming all of his favourite things about Sanji. He honestly thought at least half of them were lies, but he wouldn't protest because he knew that Zoro wouldn't like it.

Fuck, what could he give him that would even begin to show half of his gratefulness towards him? Zoro had told him he didn't want his gratefulness, but that didn't mean Sanji wasn't still grateful. It was as though the swordsman thought he could do wondrous acts of kindness and expect nothing in return. Fuck him for being such a nice citizen, that made displaying his gratefulness nearly impossible.

* * *

Sanji sighed. He was standing in front of Luffy's apartment, rolling on the balls of his feet, absolutely certain he was going to regret this. When he had been in doubt before about Zoro's birthday gift, he had gone here. Well, more accurately, he had been forced here by the power of Nami's beauty, but that was just a technicality. If he was going to be honest, he was pretty sure that while he himself had come up with the birthday gift, he could give Zoro's idiot friends some credit for the idea suddenly sparking him.

Gathering up his pride off the floor, Sanji knocked on the door.

Maybe he shouldn't do anything. Zoro didn't want to be repaid, so maybe he shouldn't bother.

 _But he bothered to get you out of there. He helped you, a totally lost cause and you're better because of it. He's saved your life, he's helped you get back on your feet, he's given you a place to call home, a roof over your head— he got you a fucking phone for crying out loud! He gave you friends, he gave you shelter—_

 _There's no need to make it sound like he saved me from the brink of death._

 _But didn't he?_

His thoughts were cut off when the door opened.

Sanji was expecting Nami or Luffy to answer the door. Who he wasn't expecting was—

"Usopp?"

The long-nosed man laughed. "Hey Sanji! I'm house-sitting for Luffy," said Usopp with a big smile. "What can I do for you?"

"But where are Luffy and Nami?"

"Oh them? They're fighting over the new furniture they want to get," Usopp replied. "See, the thing is, Nami says that Luffy takes up too much space on their bed, says he sprawls himself all over it and she swears, he stretches like rubber and takes up the whole bed. So they're going to get a new mattress."

"Why are you er … house-sitting, you called it?"

"Oh me?" Usopp laughed again. "It was Nami's idea. She decided that since I took down an entire army of freaky vikings on my own, unarmed and singlehandedly, I was better than any alarm system they could ever buy!"

"Right," Sanji said disbelievingly. "Then I guess I'll go—"

"Oh come on, tell Usopp what's the problem, I can help, I swear!" Usopp saluted to him. "Scout's honour!"

"I find it hard to believe you were a scout."

"Believe it anyway! Talk to me Sanji, what's the big deal? Problems with a certain swordsman?"

"You mean that Marimo?" Sanji shook his head. "Why would I be having problems with him?" he lied through his teeth. Unfortunately, living with Zoro had made him a worse liar. He hadn't had to lie in so long, it felt weird to and the words tumbled out of his mouth strangely. He gave Usopp a fake grin to try to pull it off.

"Well, that would be cause you're dating him, right?"

"Who told you that?" Sanji demanded.

"Nami. She got it out of Zoro," Usopp replied with a big grin on his face. Seeing the look on Sanji's face, Usopp paled. "Should I have not said that?"

"I'm going to fucking kill him," Sanji decided. The moment he got back to that shit apartment, Zoro Roronoa could consider himself dead. He'd make sure to put thistles on the Marimo's grave, they were prickly and spiky. It was perfect for the idiot. He'd make his friends write his eulogy because at that moment, he couldn't think of a single redeeming quality of Zoro's.

 _Liar._

"Now don't do anything rash," said Usopp, holding out his hands. "Why don't you come in and we'll talk?"

Sanji chewed on his cigarette, mumbling under his breath about how he was ready to fucking impale the bastard. He sighed and kicked off his shoes, putting on slippers before entering the house and leaning against the wall as usual. It felt wrong to sit in Luffy and Nami's apartment, regardless of how well he had come to know them.

"So what's the problem?" asked Usopp, taking a seat on the couch. He looked like one of those therapists who wore glasses with their hair tied up in a tight bun, a clipboard in hand as they muttered "yes" and "how does that make you feel?" before they piled you up high on drugs and sent you on your way.

Sanji let the smoke out, his chest feeling a bit tight. God, was he seriously talking to Usopp about this? "How … how would you …" Sanji turned his head away from Usopp, trying to fight down the blush on his cheeks. It wasn't his fault the room was so fucking hot. "You know … if you were to … uh, show … that you're thankful towards … someone?" he trailed off. He had done a few things for Zeff, sure, but those were easy things. That was something like mastering a new recipe, working hard as a waiter or as a cook. For Zoro … dear God, what could he do? He could cook dinner, but he did that all the time and he highly doubted that Zoro would appreciate that. Well, maybe he would, but the deeper meaning behind it was lost on him.

Usopp grinned. "Oh! I know just the thing!"

"Really?" Sanji asked, not daring to hope too much.

"Well, there was this woman whose life I saved a few years back—"

"I'm not a fucking woman!"

"Calm down, I know you're not," Usopp said, shaking his head. "Well, in return to show her thankfulness … let's see … she gave me flowers. Oh and she gave me chocolate."

"Zoro hates chocolate. Too sweet." Sanji made it a point to know all of Zoro's preferences when it came to food, making it easier to cook for him.

"Okay fine, no chocolate. She also told me herself she was grateful—"

"Won't work, Marimo's too damn nice to think he needs to be thanked. Bastard."

"She gave me small gifts—"

"We already know how fucking well it goes when I try to figure out a gift for the damn moss-brain!"

Usopp shook his head. "I think you did pretty well on your gift. Zoro loved it." He shrugged. "I don't know, I guess showing your gratefulness towards someone changes depending on the person who's being grateful and the person who's receiving the thanks. It doesn't really matter what worked for me, though, does it?"

"What do you mean?" Sanji asked, leaning forward slightly from his pillar.

"I mean— and don't start yelling at me at how sappy and corny I sound— but it shouldn't really matter what the gift is, should it? As long as it's from the heart and the person receiving it knows it, doesn't that show you care enough? Whatever you get Zoro, he'll love it since you're already putting this much thought into it. You just put aside your pride to ask for help, which takes big guts. You really want this to be something great for him, don't you?" he asked.

"Well … yeah," Sanji muttered. Usopp didn't know his past, he didn't know the reason he was freaking out so much was because if Zoro's good deeds towards Sanji each had a price labeled on them, Sanji would be bankrupt already. He didn't know the extent of what Zoro had done for him.

"Then don't worry. Do what you think he'd want."

Sanji nodded, but he still felt uneasy.

"Okay," he muttered.

"Hey," said Usopp, putting a hand on Sanji's shoulder. It was already indication enough of the effect Zoro had on him, that he wasn't flinching under Usopp's touch. "Relax. Zoro likes you. He really likes you to get in a relationship with you. I can count on one hand how many people he's dated, and that's including you. Whatever you do, he'll love it."

Sanji nodded, swallowing a lump in his throat, the tightness in his chest increasing.

* * *

Lighting up another cigarette, he felt stupid standing in front of a flower boutique.

There was a man behind the counter. He was fucking tall, with dark hair and blue eyes wearing a dark apron. He came over to Sanji and smiled at him. "Can I help you with anything?"

"You wouldn't happen to sell thistles, would you?"

The man laughed. "Why would you want to buy a thistle?"

"Because it fits him perfectly," Sanji muttered under his breath.

"Do you know the symbolism of thistles?" asked the man curiously.

"They have symbolism?" Sanji asked, his eyes widening in surprise.

"All flowers do."

"Is a thistle _really_ a flower?"

"To the Scottish it is," the man replied with a shrug. "They say that thistles represent pain, protection and pride."

"Huh." Sanji smirked. "Still fits."

The man let out a laugh. "How about I help you? I'm sure we have something for him that isn't as prickly or annoying," he said.

Sanji blinked. "You … you aren't surprised that I'm buying flowers for a guy?"

The man shook his head. "No, I've got a male lover myself."

"W-we're not l-lovers!" Sanji spluttered, trying to fight down a blush and failing miserably.

"I'm sorry for making assumptions," the man replied. "How about some delphiniums?" asked the man, gesturing towards purple flowers that kind of reminded Sanji was violets. "Do you know what these symbolize?"

"Humanity's ability to give things the stupidest names?"

The man shook his head. He didn't even look offended at Sanji's insult. "These flowers represent the infinite possibilities that surround us, believing anything is possible."

Sanji nodded, though he didn't completely like flowers all that much, he had to admit they _were_ pretty flowers. "Interesting," he mumbled. "What about those?" he asked, pointing towards the roses. "I know those symbolize love, but isn't that kind of a pain?"

"It doesn't necessarily always symbolize love, but more often then not, they do," said the man. "Why do you think it's a pain?" he asked, tilting his head with a look of complete innocence about him, genuinely curious.

"Well I mean, sure, they look pretty," Sanji said, gesturing towards a nice red bouquet. "But there are thorns. Don't all roses have thorns? They're sharp and prickly, but they're also deceiving, looking pretty. It makes you want to touch them. I know that roses have soft petals, but the thorns …" He trailed off before shaking his head. "Anyway, isn't it just kind of strange? That they would choose a beautiful, but dangerous flower to symbolize love?"

"Well … isn't love like that?" asked the man.

"What do you mean?"

"Isn't love the same way? It's beautiful but dangerous, isn't it?" He smiled. "It's letting someone hurt you and trusting them not to. It's soft like the petals but it's also just a tad painful. It looks nice and pretty, but when you get up close, you realize how tricky and prickly it can be. And then you just need to teach yourself to maneuver yourself around the thorns. Sure, you won't always be successful, but in the end, isn't it worth it? Love hurts, but why do you think people fall in love anyway? The pain is part of the joy of falling, isn't it? It's better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all. Isn't that what they say?"

Sanji stayed silent.

"Well, that's what I think at least," the man finished sheepishly.

Sanji nodded. He wasn't silent because he thought what the dark haired man had said was stupid. Rather, it was that what he said made sense. Love really was crazy, wasn't it? He shook his head. No, he wasn't in love with Zoro— though he might be soon, he was so fucking close to it anyway. "Anyway," he said, trying to change the topic. "Um, what would you recommend?"

"Well, let's see … what do you want the flowers to be for?"

"Well …" Sanji trailed off. Was he really going to explain his story to a stranger at a flower boutique? "I've kinda been in trouble for the past few years— nothing illegal, I'm not mixed up with the yakuza or anything, but … Anyway I was in a really rough spot for a while and this guy just kind of … I don't know, he just helped me. Got me back on my feet, he … he saved me really. And I don't know what to do for him." Apparently, he was.

"How about a carnation?" asked the flower boutique person. "Pink ones represent gratitude."

Sanji shook his head. "Nah, they're too girly." Sanji's eyes were drawn towards two flowers in particular. A white one that reminded him just a little of a lily and a pink one that seemed to spread out like a rose would in full bloom. "What about those?"

"The pink one's a peony and the white one's a Star of Bethlehem," said the man. "They represent healing and hope respectively."

"Could you … could you make me a bouquet with those two flowers?"

"Are you sure the peony isn't too girly for you?" the man teased with a smile.

"Just wrap it, alright?" demanded Sanji, rolling his eyes.

The man chuckled. "Of course."

* * *

Sanji felt stupid as he put the flowers in a jar. The bastard Marimo didn't even have a decent vase to put the flowers in.

Staring at the bouquet, Sanji felt stupid.

Sure he had put great thought into his gift of flowers, but he felt as though it was too … normal. Too many people gave others flowers. In fact, that boutique shop employee had mentioned that when he had passed his proficiency exams, his lover had given him flowers to congratulate him. It was just so … typical. He knew that he and Zoro weren't typical so doing something so mundane, it felt strange.

He wouldn't take the flowers back, especially not after the time that employee had spent teaching him the "deeper meaning of flowers" and shit like that. Nah, he'd keep them. He just needed something else he could do for Zoro.

It seemed he'd be living in the kitchen once again.

He made every one of Zoro's favourite meals, including sea king meat, which as rather hard. He cooked until he was practically sweating on the meal, his sleeves had to be rolled up, he had no other choice. After all, he couldn't very well work while getting dough and such on his sleeves. Not on his good shirt. Not that he considered wearing his crummy shirt instead.

As he kneaded the bread, that list came back to him.

 _Your hands._

He watched his fingers as they roughed up the dough. Of course he thought his hands were his treasure, he wouldn't be able to cook without them, should he ever damage his hands, he'd probably go through a life crisis. But at the same time, he didn't think there was anything that spectacular about them. It was what his hands could _do_ that was amazing, the meals and dishes that were created because of them, but he had seen Zeff do the same thing. That didn't make his hands any different from Zeff's. He knew Zeff had beautiful hands, callused, large and hard-working.

When he put the dough in the oven, he spent some time staring at his scars, something he rarely ever did. With his newfound resolution to never cut again, it didn't hurt as much. To know that he had these scars … Zoro had listed them in fact. He said he liked Sanji's scars.

 _Why though? Why would you like something so ugly?_

He was ashamed of them. That he had to find peace in causing himself harm, it was disgraceful. That he had to do such things in order to attain peace of mind. It hurt him. The scars were hideous, they tarnished his already stupid looking skin. He wanted to cry every time he saw them, thinking he was weak.

 _Your strength._

But then again, without these scars, would he have ever known Zoro? Would he have ever taken notice in him? Because as much as Sanji tried to hide it, he was grateful for Zoro's intrusion on his life. He was grateful he had met the swordsman and even considered it to be the very thing that had changed his life so drastically. He owed his life to him, he owed his very existence to him.

As he worked, other things came to him.

 _Your flexibility._

 _Your hips._

 _Your passion for cooking._

 _Your determination._

 _Your smile._

 _Your smirk._

 _The way you hold your cigarette._

 _The way you lick your finger before turning the page in a book you're reading._

 _The way you fight with everything you have._

 _Your spirit._

 _Your perseverance._

 _Your ability to be immune to idiots._

 _Your thoughtfulness._

 _The way you say "pardon"._

 _The way you think black is a colour (it's not)._

 _Your words games._

 _Your fucked up eyebrows._

 _Your analytical mind._

 _How you let down your guard, just a little around me._

 _The way you kick._

 _Your humbleness._

 _Your innocence._

Innocence. Sanji didn't believe he had any and yet Zoro claimed he did. He didn't bother asking about it. Instead when he was done cooking, he collapsed on the couch, turned on the TV and used that awful soap opera Zoro enjoyed as his white noise as he tried to fall asleep before Zoro got back.

* * *

When Zoro returned, he stared at the feast the same way he had stared at it the first time Sanji had made him one.

"What's the occasion?" asked Zoro, dropping his gym bag on the floor and carefully setting aside his swords. He took a seat at the table, probably knowing if he argued, Sanji would force him into his seat anyway.

"Wanted to test out a few recipes," Sanji said. Wow that sounded lame, even to him. He took a moment to breathe, trying to calm himself. He felt his breath catch in his throat as he readied himself for Zoro's response.

The swordsman merely shrugged and dug in after a hurried "itadakimasu".

Sanji sat across from him all the while, watching him eat. He still felt as though Zoro's table manners needed some work, but at least he had him thanking people for his meal before he ate now. Still though, it felt as though he hadn't done enough. He ate and they spoke about pointless things. Just about everything, now that he thought about it. It almost felt as though nothing had changed, except for the occasional moments when Zoro asked Sanji to pass the salt or something and their fingers brushed. In those moments, Sanji remembered Zoro's words.

When the meal was finished, Zoro thanked Sanji for the meal again and was about to leave the kitchen when Sanji spoke.

"Oi, Marimo!" he called.

"Eh?" The swordsman turned around and gave Sanji a funny look. "What is it?"

"You going to help me clean up?" he asked.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously," Sanji repeated.

Zoro sighed and went with him to the sink. "Let me guess, you wash, I dry?" he asked dryly.

"Don't look so pissed, I'll start to think you hate my company," Sanji teased.

Zoro looked at him straight in the eye. "Never. Don't even joke about that."

Sanji nodded and started to scrub furiously at a plate.

"So what's with the new decor?" asked Zoro, nodding towards the bouquet of flowers.

Instantly, the tension that seemed to hover in the air disappeared while Sanji recounted his story about how there was a giant of a man working a flower boutique, talking freely about his sexual escapades with his older boyfriend. He didn't mention the man's insightful lecture on love.

"So what do those flowers mean?" asked Zoro.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he told you that flowers meant something right? So what was the meaning behind those flowers?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip, cleaning the soap out of a glass. "Um, well, the pink ones represent healing," he said softly. "And the white ones are a symbol for hope."

Zoro swallowed thickly. "Sanji …"

Sanji turned his head away. "Don't get all sentimental on me now, Marimo, I just decided the place needed something new. You need to get a fucking proper vase you know," he added. "That's a fucking stupid jar I had to put them in."

"It's looks stupider cause you put flowers in it," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "Did you seriously ask for thistles?"

"Why not?"

"Cause they're prickly. That'd be like asking for a cactus."

"Cacti need less management," Sanji said. "Less water, less care." He shrugged. "The Scottish like thistles."

"Yeah and they believe in unicorns," Zoro added.

"I bet if you went to Scotland, they'd worship you, thinking you're a leprechaun." He smirked at Zoro's frown.

"Take that back!"

"Nope, it's your fault for having green hair, Marimo," said Sanji.

 _SPLASH!_

Sanji blinked. Soapy water dripped down his face, nearly getting in his eye. He glared at Zoro. "Do you have any idea how dangerous that was?" he demanded. "You could've gotten that in my eye. I could've become blind!"

Zoro seemed to back away, scared of Sanji's accusations.

"You bastard!" Sanji snapped. "How well do you think that would've gone? Fucking blinding the person you're in a relationship with?"

Zoro looked guilty. "I'm s—"

 _SPLASH!_

Zoro wiped his face, his eyes filled with a mischievous glint. "That was dirty cook," he said. "And if _I_ had been blinded?"

"You only need one eye to fight, don't you?"

Sanji smirked. He continued to wash the latest plate, tensing his shoulders, ready for Zoro to splash him. Maybe he'd even grab a sponge and shower it over his head. He'd retaliate with dumping Dawn on his head. Besides, the moss-head probably needed to wash his hair anyway.

The tension in his shoulder slowly evaporated though as Zoro did nothing as the seconds passed by. He felt a hand on his shoulder and instantly tensed. He turned his head to shout at him but was cut off almost immediately by Zoro's lips.

Sanji gasped in surprise, his hands slowly letting go of the plate in his hand. Somewhere vaguely in his mind, he wondered whether or not he had chipped, if not broken, the plate, but at the moment, the main thought that was taking over his mind was the way that Zoro was trying to pry his lips open with his tongue.

It didn't matter that Sanji's hands were soapy when they reached out for him, wrapping around his neck and gently pulling at the hairs at the base of his neck, driving the Marimo closer to him. It didn't matter that the dishes were forgotten or that Zoro's neck was in a rather uncomfortable position (he didn't seem to be complaining). All that mattered was the way he seemed to be teasing Sanji, biting at his lip, trying to get him to open up to him.

The moment Sanji parted his lips, Zoro dove in.

Well Sanji would be stupid if he just let the Marimo take charge. He pushed back against him, fighting with him for dominance. When Zoro tired to push him against the sink's counter, Sanji fought back by trying to push him back. It that moment, Zoro let out a sharp intake of breath and Sanji realized what had happened. He was humping Zoro. He had just humped Zoro and the swordsman was getting hard.

"Fuck, Sanji," Zoro muttered. He put his hands on Sanji's waist, pulling away from him, keeping a fair distance between them. "I …" He bit his lip, staring at the ground as though he were guilty or something.

"My fault," Sanji said, shaking his head.

The two of them finished the dishes and when they were done, they put them away, this time telling a story about a boy named Marimo who enjoyed fighting and acted like a prissy whenever someone touched his swords.

Once the last dish was put away, Zoro rubbed his hands together and nodded. "So uh … night," he said in a somewhat strangled voice.

Sanji took a step closer to him. "Are you still hard?" he asked in a soft voice.

Zoro blushed. "I can deal with it," he said. "Cold showers and all …"

"You won't … um …" Sanji bit his bottom lip, beginning to blush as much as Zoro, if not more. "You're not going to take care of it yourself?"

Zoro shrugged. "I'll be fine."

Sanji shook his head and stepped closer to him.

"Sanji," Zoro said in a hoarse voice, "you're really not helping me right now."

"Come on Marimo," Sanji said, his mind made up. He grabbed Zoro by his arm and began to tug him across the apartment towards Zoro's bedroom. "Keep the lights off," he told Zoro. He then took a seat on the bed. He made sure his back was facing the full-length mirror in Zoro's room. He still wasn't prepared to look into it. "Sit," he told Zoro.

Zoro gulped and hesitantly took a step forward, as though scared of what Sanji might do. "I'm not going to bite," Sanji told him teasingly.

Zoro took a seat across from Sanji.

Zoro's bed was huge, being king-sized and all. Sanji was able to sit crossed legged in about the middle of the bed while Zoro sat with his legs stretched out near the bed-post.

Taking a deep breath, Sanji crawled a little closer to the swordsman who gulped.

* * *

"S-Sanji?"

Sanji had never heard Zoro sound so small, but he didn't stop. Despite the fact that his hands were shaking and his breath was coming out uneven, he sat on his knees, slowly beginning to unzip Zoro's jeans. If he dared to think about it, he knew he'd back out.

"W-what are you doing?"

Sanji didn't trust his voice to work, so he said nothing. Once the button and zipper were down, he wondered if Zoro could see his trembling fingers as they slowly took him out of his boxers.

Sanji had never done anything like this before. He knew what masturbation was, but living with Zeff, it felt wrong to do such a thing. He had never dared to look up porn on Zoro's computer, the history would show too much. Zoro was thick in his hand, a little hard to wrap his hand around him completely. He was longer than Patty, Sanji mused, even if thinking of the bastard cook caused him horrible memories. Zoro was also slightly less thick than Carne.

"Fuck, Sanji," Zoro muttered.

Sanji looked up at the swordsman who had his eyes shut tightly, as though he didn't want to look at him. The green-haired man sucked in a deep breath and turned his head away from Sanji, his eyes still closed. He was breathing through his mouth, taking his time. "W-why are you doing this?"

Sanji's brow furrowed. "You don't like it?" he asked timidly, slowly bringing his hand up and down Zoro's shaft.

"Fuck, no," Zoro shook his head. "It's not that," he said. "It's just …" He trailed off, his line of thought cut off by Sanji's continuation of stroking.

He was hesitant and he wondered if Zoro could feel his hand shaking as it gently stroked up and down his length. He watched as pre-cum started to drip out of the tip. Sanji paused, his fingers wrapping around Zoro's base before he carefully and nervously leaned down, licking away the pre-cum.

He heard Zoro suck in a breath, his hands fisting the sheets on either side of him. "Sanji," he breathed in a voice that sounded absolutely tortured.

Sanji experimentally licked around the head of Zoro's cock. It was kind of like licking a popsicle, he found. While sucking off Patty and Carne had made him cry, Zoro let him take his time. In fact, Zoro just seemed to be laying there, feeling everything, but the hand which was woven into Sanji's hair was trying to pull him off.

"Sanji," he said softly, "you don't have to do this."

"It's okay," Sanji said, looking up at Zoro. "I know I don't."

"Then why are you— FUCK!"

Sanji's mouth took all of Zoro's head into his mouth. He didn't do anything, just let the head rest in the warmth of his mouth. Zoro's grip on his hair tightened, almost painful but he let go almost instantly and instead, ran his fingers through Sanji's hair slowly. His breathing was harsh. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he wondered how many other people had ever seen Zoro like this before. He slowly let his tongue swirl around a bit.

"Shit," Zoro muttered. "S-Sanji …"

Sanji continued stroking, some pre-cum leaking into his mouth. He could be honest. He didn't particularly enjoy the taste, but he didn't hate it either. It was one of those things that he wouldn't mind having again, but would prefer a different dish if given the option. He hummed gently, the vibrations in his throat causing Zoro to shiver. He wasn't even sure if Zoro knew he was doing it.

Trying to calm himself down, Sanji tried to take a bit more of Zoro into his mouth. Here he was on his knees while Zoro lay back on his back, trying to take in more of Zoro's member. Patty and Carne's words rang through his head, _"Suck my cock, whore!"_ It was funny, wasn't it? Here he was in a situation almost like he had been with Patty and Carne and yet he felt so different. He didn't feel dirty, he didn't feel ashamed. The only thing he was focusing on were the sounds Zoro was making, whether the swordsman was conscious of them or not. He wanted to focus on Zoro's pleasure and Zoro's alone.

Closing his eyes, he took more into his mouth. About a third of Zoro's length was in his throat while his hand gently stroked him to make up for what he couldn't take.

Zoro's hands were in his hair, gently running through it. His callused fingers were gentle and Sanji hummed again, causing Zoro to let out a gasp.

He had five inches in his mouth now and he was afraid his gag reflex would start. He tried to relax his throat, to take more. Zoro was muttering things under his breath, a combination of curse words and Sanji's name when Sanji took half an inch more and licked and åZoro's hand gripped his hair tighter. Sanji's hold on Zoro's cock tightened and the swordsman moaned.

Sanji started to stroke him faster and a little harder as he took more in his mouth. When he reached six inches, he knew he couldn't do anymore unless he wanted to start to gag. Maybe he'd dare to try it another time— _another time_? Sanji hadn't exactly planned to do this again any time soon, but suddenly doing it again didn't sound that bad. As long as Zoro would continue to buck his hips like that, moaning his name softly.

He started to pull off and he swore Zoro whimpered. He waited until just the head was in his mouth before he went back down, taking in six inches again. He continued to do this for a few minutes before Zoro tensed.

"Fuck, Sanji, I'm gonna …" There was a sharp intake of breath and that was his only warning before Zoro shot his load into Sanji's mouth.

It hit the back of his mouth and he swallowed with his mouth still on Zoro.

* * *

"Shit, I'm sorry," Zoro said, using his elbows to help himself sit up.

Sanji pulled off of him and wiped his mouth where some of Zoro's cum dripped down his chin. He shook his head. "It's okay."

"Did I stain your clothes?"

"No, I don't think so," Sanji said. He felt a bit shaky. Was there always that much? His throat felt dry, the tightening in his chest increasing. He sat up straighter and coughed lightly. "Just … wasn't exactly expecting it."

"You didn't have to do that," Zoro told him.

"I know," Sanji told him for what seemed like the thousandth time that night. He paused. "I wanted to."

Zoro was already panting slightly from his orgasm, his limbs were probably a bit limp, but he sucked in a deep breath and laid back down, rubbing his face with his hand. "Jesus Sanji, don't just say things like that!"

"Huh?"

Zoro sat up again and sighed. "Never mind," he muttered under his breath.

"Did you … did you not like it?"

Zoro let out a light laugh. "I just fucking came in your mouth and you think I didn't like it? You're very strange you know." He zipped his pants back up and sat up. "Do you want me to get you a towel? I think you really might've stained that shirt of yours."

Sanji stared at him.

This was so … different then what he'd thought it'd be like. He thought … he didn't know what he thought it would be. He supposed he had come to the conclusion that every man was like Patty or Carne, who liked things rough and forcing people onto them. Zoro wasn't like that. He wasn't like that at all. And suddenly, Sanji felt horrible for even thinking he was anything like those bastard cooks. He shook his head, letting out a sigh of disbelief at himself. He couldn't understand what he had been so worried about. Maybe he had thought Zoro would think he was dirty for doing it, or expecting him to ask for sex afterwards, but that wasn't what Zoro was doing. In fact, Zoro was asking to clean him up.

"I'm sorry, by the way," the swordsman added. "I don't usually …" He seemed to pause in search of words. "It's been a while," he said. "I uh, didn't mean to cum in your mouth …" He trailed off and turned his head away. In the dim light of the room, he seemed to be blushing. "Um, I'll get you that towel."

Sanji couldn't help it. He laughed.

"What you laughing at, Curly Brow?" demanded Zoro.

It seemed this changed nothing. Any worries Sanji had about this affecting their relationship, sending it in a direction he wasn't sure he was ready for it to go in, evaporated on the spot. Instead of thanking Zoro for calming his fears, for being so considerate, for even seeming worried when Sanji had first started to go down on him, he just smirked. "Who apologizes for something as stupid as that?"

"Fuck you," Zoro told him, rolling his eyes. He didn't mean it.

"You wish," Sanji said back.

This was good. This was better than good. This was amazing and Sanji swore he had never been happier.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay the thank-yous!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : Trust me, I did not expect it to turn out that cheesy and sappy. I wanted to do it with post it notes and then I remembered the game I came up with my friend. It was cause I wanted to write a story about three girls who were complaining about their boyfriends to each other to figure out who had the worst boyfriend and then the girls were all like, "yeah, they do that but ..." and then they proceed to compliment each other's boyfriends without complimenting their own. My friend seriously thought it was an ego-boosting game._

 _takafumi : Zoro or Sanji? God I have trouble making up my mind about them. I think that while they stand alone as amazing characters, when they're together its amazing. Sanji always acts like an idiot around the girls and Zoro's off sleeping or fighting for his dream but when they fight, it's like they're too pissed off at each other to focus on anything else and instead of acting like an idiot, Sanji's focused and he's sharp and Zoro's saying all sorts of stuff he doesn't say. It's the pure, raw honesty in their relationship that I really like about them._

 _lilcutieprincess : I was watching **Brotherhood** in Apple TV while my mom was in the room and I got to the scene where the dog that Hawkeye took in (I don't remember their name, or if they were even named, I haven't seen it in a while) was licking her feet under the covers, except I didn't know that cause I hadn't seen the episode before and she was making weird sounds and my mom was like, "What are you watching?" and I just totally paled and even though I knew better I was like, "Shit, did **Brotherhood** just go hentai?!"_

 _crystalbluefox : If there are guys who are really like that, well, uh, I've never met them. Well I also go to an all-girls school and rarely leave my house cause I'm pretty dedicated to my school and homework. And my fandoms. I don't know, I think I've have this sexuality that only applies towards fictional characters. Maybe it's called fansexual? But you don't know how sad it was when I saw this picture of Ed and it was like, "Anime Crush: cause real guys suck" and the sad fact that I was like, "yeah, they kinda do." My mom's trying to force me to go to a school dance and she's like, "you'll find some guy there who also hates being there and is being forced there by his mother". That or my family's starting to think I'm a lesbian. I don't know. Anyway, don't they always say the best of them are gay?_

 _S.P. Tripathi : That app always crashes on my iPod but not on my iPad. I also have the ficitonpress app. It comes in handy when I go somewhere without Internet. That way, I can still read my favourite stories without wi-fi. It was pretty funny, when I first started reading gay stuff I got so obsessed, all of the stories that were in my "Reading" category, they're ordered by when I read them last. All the straight couples were at the very end and all the gay ones were at the top. I like both kind of relationships. I think though the reason I like male slash better than female slash (though as I said, I do like straight couples) is because it humbles the male characters. In all straight couples, the man's almost never vulnerable and they only show you such things near like, the very end when he has his nice long confession. So I guess it's cause of that, the humbling thing and making the boys just so sweet, but also because when you have a gay couple, there's the fact that before the relationship starts, there's always the unspoken barrier (or sometimes spoken barrier) of the fact that they're of the same sex. People say Yaoi doesn't properly reflect a homosexual relationship, which I won't disagree with, but I do like how in some of them, it seems like the fact that characters are homosexual don't even matter, they make it seem like society's more accepting of these things and that's what I really like about it._

 _Okay, question: **there was a character in here whom I don't own, who is not from One Piece. I did not say his name but gave you plenty of hints. Who is he?**_

 _I decided to post this chapter earlier cause you guys did give me 5 reviews, like asked. However, the thing was, before this chapter, I had 2 chapters already prepared before a chapter was posted so that I could always update even when I was having trouble cause there was already a few chapters prepared. Instead, I only have one chapter prepared, chapter 27, which is why I might take a while to update again. Then again, knowing my enthusiasm towards this fanfic, you probably won't have to wait long._

 _I REALLY want to know what you thought of the sexual content scene cause like I've said before, this story is a lot of experimenting on my part. I want to make sure I don't suck at this!_


	27. Holly Jolly Christmas

_**Author's Note:** This was not meant to be this long, but it ended up this way anyway, so I guess tough luck for me, eh? I'm not sure why, but this chapter ended up full of references. I don't own **One Piece** , but my question for this chapter will be replaced by the following: a dare to all of you who read this story. Name all of the references, (tell me where they're from) and also, whether or not you had to maybe look them up to find out where they're from. The portion at the end was taken from watching a **BuzzFeed** video, called **"How To Know If You're In A Relationship".** My friend also made me watch **"The Try Guys Try Cosplay"** and the Zoro's opinion on anime does not reflect my own, rather, it reflects someone who's never seen anime before and does appreciate its wonderfulness. I thought I was done with weird formats. Turns out I love them too much. I asked my friend if black was a colour. She said no. I've figured something out about this story, which I kinda had the suspicion of for the past while. Zoro's chapters are unfairly larger than Sanji's chapters. Maybe because I give Zoro all the good chapters by accident ... I guess it depends on my mood, if I'm in the mood for humour (which I usually am, I like my humour with a dash of angst), Zoro's chapters just flow more naturally, not that I don't love writing Sanji's chapters, but his fun chapters are ones like the food fight and stuff. I know it's not Christmas, just try to get in the Christmas spirit though, okay? Or reread the chapter when there's snow on the ground. The timeline for this story is a bit screwed up to me, but once I figured it out for sure, I'll be sure to tell you. I swear the story started off in August though ... HOLY CRAP THIS IS LONG! Hope you enjoy!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :  
**

 **Mentions of past abuse, past suicidal thoughts, past self-harm**

* * *

Chapter 27: Holly Jolly Christmas

* * *

Shopping for presents near Christmas time was like trying to get a swimsuit in summer. The one time you needed it and you finally acknowledged that you needed it, that was when there was nothing around to be found. Zoro had not thought this through. He had already gotten Luffy a special steak machine that made it easier to make, he had gotten Nami a fancy compass to her great joy and he got Usopp a new pair of goggles, but he had no doubt that Kaya had probably gotten him a better pair. Now he just had to figure out something for Sanji and he had no fucking clue where to start.

Fuck.

This was the reason why he was now standing in a fancy culinary store with Luffy, looking for a new set of knives for Sanji.

Each time he watched Sanji hold a knife, two thoughts went through his head. He wondered what it would be like if instead of a knife, Sanji held a sword and how good he'd be at wielding it, while another, bigger part of his mind, wondered if Sanji would miss the cut and cause himself more pain. Worse, if he'd enjoy the pain.

Getting a set of knives for Sanji was nerve racking to say the least.

"What about one of these?" asked Luffy, pointing towards an item on display.

"Luffy, that's a meat grinder, we're getting Sanji kitchen knives."

"We are?"

Zoro shook his head. He knew asking Luffy to come would be a problem and yet he had done it anyway. Was he just stupid or something?

Sighing, Zoro tried to find the aisle with the kitchen knives. He would never ask an employee for help, that'd just be stupid. He imagined he'd get into an argument with them over something stupid and then there'd be problems and it would really suck if Zoro wasn't able get the cook anything, especially after what he had done for him the other day.

Zoro closed his eyes and tried to clam his breathing. Just thinking about it sent shivers down his spine and he was brought right back into the moment.

God he had been so _awkward_ when it was over, he was pretty sure Sanji now thought of him as a complete dork. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. He'd find the blond some great kitchen knives and then that might make up a little for his screw up of being so … Fuck, he couldn't find words. Maybe he should just call it inexperienced? He had just seemed so … He had never cum that fast, but then again, he hadn't been laid in nearly half a year. Yeah, that was why … But fuck, had he really apologized for it? Had he actually admitted to his lack of a sex life to the cook?

"Zoro? You look like you're beating yourself up over something," Luffy said. "I asked one of the employees, they say the knife section is aisle five."

"There are five aisles in this place?!"

Luffy shook his head. "I think there's thirteen total." He shrugged. "Anyway, you going to come? Christmas is like, three days away, remember? You need to get him something good, especially to repay him for that sword he got you. Shushu?"

"Shu _sui_ ," Zoro corrected him. He bit his bottom lip before nodding and following Luffy into aisle five.

Aisle five was filled with knives. It almost looked like a weaponry in Zoro's opinion. He remembered Sanji telling him he couldn't tell the difference between different knives and honestly, Zoro couldn't care less about them, but they were part of Sanji's culinary arsenal and so, Zoro figured, he'd best figure something out.

"What about this one?"

Zoro stared at the knife and frowned. "I think he already has one of those."

"You don't know?"

"I'm usually talking to him when he's cooking, his back's always to me, you think I have x-ray vision or something?" Zoro snapped. He rolled his eyes. "Look, we just need something that looks fancy. I think." He picked up a knife that looked pretty fashionable with a nice oak handle (if Nami were here, she'd claim he had no clue what fashion even was, never mind fashionable) and gave a small smile. "Like this."

"Um Zoro?" Luffy asked.

"What? Sanji's a great cook, he needs the best equipment, right?"

"But the price …"

"I think I can handle it Luffy," Zoro told him, rolling his eyes. He checked the item display price and instantly his eyes gauged out of his face. "Fuck that, he can deal with crappy knives!" He shook his head. "His stuff tastes good the way it is now, why ruin a good thing?"

"I thought you could handle it," Luffy teased.

"Yeah well, I didn't know there could be so many zeroes." Putting it away, Zoro turned to another array of knives. They all looked sharp and made him feel as though anyone could stab him while his back was turned. _Buying things for the cook shouldn't be this dangerous,_ he thought to himself, tilting his head and inspecting the blade. _I think it might be sharper than Sandai—_

"Hey Zoro!"

Zoro's head snapped around to see Luffy dragging an employee towards them. He was wearing the customary uniform— a shirt promoting the store and an apron. He looked stupid in Zoro's opinion. He was also freakishly tall with dark hair and blue eyes. Zoro felt as though that description was familiar to him somehow. "No," he said immediately the second he realized what Luffy intended to do. "No way! We aren't asking for help!"

"Hi," said the man with the stupid apron. "I hear you're looking to buy a knife set for a friend of yours?"

"What's it to you?"

"Don't be childish Zoro," said Luffy. "If we don't get help, we won't end up getting Sanji anything and I think you owe him a decent present for Christmas."

"Well, can I recommend—"

"No, you can't!" Zoro snapped. He took a moment to pause and breathe. "Sorry," he forced the word out like it was poison. Zoro Roronoa hated apologizing and he never did it. Unless it was for the sake of the cook. Fuck he was whipped, wasn't he? "I think we can handle ourselves just fine," he said. "Sorry to bother you."

"It's really no bother," said the giant.

"How tall are you?" asked Zoro before he could stop himself.

"186 centimetres," he replied. "You remind me of someone," he added softly, as though talking more to himself than Zoro. "He was very … eccentric I suppose you could say." He shrugged. "So, do you know what kind of knives your friend owns?"

"I don't know, kitchen knives. I don't know any culinary shit," Zoro said, folding his arms. He knew he sort of maybe possibly looked like he was pouting, but he didn't need help. Luffy was just wasting this guy's time. He'd be fine without any help from the big guy. "Look, you can scurry off and check inventory or whatever the hell culinary employees do. We don't need help."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive," Zoro said through gritted teeth. He did not have the time or patience for this. Not at all.

The man nodded. "Okay."

For some reason, Zoro thought he had given in too easily. Here he was, a confused customer (not that he'd ever admit that out loud) without a clue what he was doing and here was an employee who was probably gunning to get Employee of the Month or some shit like that, just letting him go. He really thought the man would've put up more of a fight.

Zoro frowned. This didn't sit well with him.

"Hey!" he called to the retreating figure as he was about to exit the aisle. "Where do you think you're going?"

There was a place in his mind that was telling him he was being stupid and that he should just let it go. After all, he tried so hard to get rid of the man and now he was calling him back? Where was the sense in that? God, this was absolutely ridiculous and yet for some reason, his mouth kept moving. "You're just going to leave us alone?"

The man stared at him confused. It didn't seem like his attempt to leave had been a ploy to get Zoro to ask for help, he was genuinely confused. He took a few steps closer to the two idiots in the kitchen store, pointing to himself. "Me?" he asked.

"Yeah, you," Zoro shouted at him from the other end of the aisle. "What kind of shitty employee just lets a customer go?"

The man walked up to them, but it wasn't the purposeful stride that many of Zoro's enemies whom he had antagonized had. No, he seemed calm and level-headed, which was very strange. He blinked and then the man was in front of him.

"I was under the impression you didn't want my help," said the man with genuine confusion causing his brow to furrow. "Have you changed your mind?"

"No," Zoro said, feeling a bit ruffled. What was his purpose in antagonizing this man? He couldn't figure it out, not at all. He frowned. "But still …"

"Do you want company?" asked the man.

Zoro's response was a quick and ready flat out "no", but Luffy beat him to it and instead of saying "no", like he should've like a good straw hat idiot, he said "Sure!" If that wasn't enough, he said it with that big stupid grin on his face. "The more the merrier, right?"

The man gave him a smile. "Of course."

Fuck. Well fine, it wasn't like Zoro was going to spend that much time in the store anyway. Find a suitable present and get out, that was simple, wasn't it?

Of course it wasn't.

Because Luffy was there and Luffy insisted on asking the man questions, including if he was a full-time employee. He was a part-timer, who had several other jobs, including one at a flower boutique. Zoro stared at him when he mentioned it. "You wouldn't have happened to have seen a blond come into the store at any time?" he asked. "Tall, black blazer, golden buttons on it. Wears his hair so that it covers one of his eyes and has a fucked up eyebrow?"

The man's eyes widened. "Oh! I know who you're talking about." He smiled. "Are you the person he was getting those flowers for?"

"Wow, Zoro, Sanji got you flowers?" asked Luffy. He laughed. "Really? What were they?"

"Peonies and Stars of Bethlehem," he said without blinking.

The man nodded. "Yes, they represent healing—"

"And hope," Zoro finished. "I know. He told me."

The man smiled even wider. "Do you like them?"

Zoro instantly felt embarrassed, turning his head away. "They were fine," he said in a stiff voice. "Nothing to be over-excited about."

The man let out a light chuckle.

"What's so funny?" Honestly, had Zoro become a preschooler over-night?

"Nothing," said the man. "You're interesting."

"Glad to know I entertain you."

"I didn't say that," the tall man said with a slight frown.

"Interesting, entertaining, they mean the same thing in my book." _And Sanji's too._ But this man didn't have to know that. "Come on Luffy, let's get going."

He grabbed Luffy's arm. He had been in the store for almost an hour and it was completely fruitless. He wasn't going to waste his time around here, which meant that it was time for Zoro to take his leave.

Luffy grabbed onto the stranger's arm as Zoro tried to drag him, pulling him with them. Zoro made a sharp turn and heard a loud crash. Luffy had smacked into the display of meat grinders, causing them all to fall onto him and the employee whom Zoro was beginning to see as a victim of Luffy's stupidity. The man didn't seem angry though. Rather, he smiled and rubbed his head, seeming to be in the middle of holding back laughter.

Zoro pulled Luffy out of the wreckage and growled. "Come on, let's get out of here before we cause anymore damage."

"But the knives—"

"Sanji has enough knives," Zoro told him, pulling him through the aisles. How big was this store? Was it just a giant maze? Everywhere he turned, it seemed there was another aisle. Stocked with different things sure, but when he saw the cutting boards for the fifth time, Zoro decided he was lost. He didn't like deciding he was lost.

"The door's over there," Luffy said, pointing towards the exit.

Zoro pulled him towards it when he was stopped by a large man. "Are you the one who knocked over the meat grinder display?"

"That was this guy," Zoro said, gesturing towards Luffy. "Why? How is it any of your business?"

"I'm sorry, but we're going to have to ask you to leave," the man said, crossing his arms over his chest. "Please exit the store silently."

"We were heading there anyway," Zoro grumbled, refusing to listen to Luffy's complaints about how he was totally sure he could afford the meat grinder if he combined his money with Zoro's. Once they were outside the store and they stood there in silence for a while, something dawned on Zoro.

"Did I just get kicked out of the store?"

Luffy shrugged. "I don't know. Hey, Zoro, do you think if I asked Nami, she'd get me that meat grinder?"

* * *

"Do you know what day it is?"

"Why does that—?"

"Answer the question."

Zoro sighed. "December twenty-fourth."

"What was that?"

"I'm not fucking repeating it!" Zoro yelled into his phone. "If you aren't going to be any help—"

"Did you seriously think Luffy could help you get Sanji a Christmas gift?" Nami asked. "You should've asked me in the first place, that way you wouldn't have wasted all this time."

"You know, there was a _reason_ why I didn't ask you—"

"Don't you know anything about your boyfriend? What, you don't even know what Sanji likes?" demanded Nami and Zoro swore, he could see her scowl through the phone.

Zoro sighed.

"Don't you sigh at me, Roronoa, you'd better clean up your act!"

"And this is my reason. A fucking good one too," he muttered to himself. "And don't call him my boyfriend," he snapped through gritted teeth.

"You're dating him, aren't you?"

"Yeah but …"

"But nothing!" Nami sighed. "I swear, you can't think of anything Sanji would like? What does he like to do? What are his hobbies?"

"Besides watching crappy anime?" Zoro shrugged, then remembered Nami couldn't see him. "I don't know, I can't think of anything."

"THINK HARDER!"

"Jesus woman, don't blow my ear off!" Zoro said, pulling the phone away from his poor, abused auditory canal. He sighed. "Never mind, I'll just go—"

"Zoro Roronoa, if you hang up I swear I'm going to murder you in your sleep!"

Zoro scoffed. "I'd like to see you try."

"Don't test me," Nami warned and Zoro's blood ran cold. If there was anyone you shouldn't underestimate, it was Nami.

"Fine, fine. But I mean what do you want me to do? I've got like …" Zoro checked his watch. "Eight hours before it's Christmas, that's not enough time."

Nami sighed. "Boys and tardiness," she muttered. "Well, you have a few more hours than Sanji had. Zoro, I'm going to ask you to close your eyes now."

"Are you insane woman?" Zoro demanded.

"Zoro. Close. Your. Eyes."

Zoro closed his eyes.

"Are they closed?"

"Yes they're fucking closed, what do you want from me?"

"Okay good, keep them close. Now I want you to think and I want to be able to hear your thoughts. I want you to talk to me, tell me what you're thinking as you think it. No censoring, no bullshit, you're not omitting anything."

"How is this supposed to help me?" Zoro asked. "Is this some kind of fung-shui shit?"

"That's moving furniture Zoro," Nami deadpanned. "Just do it."

"Okay okay, calm down!" Zoro sighed. "What am I supposed to think about though?"

"Isn't it obvious? Sanji!" Zoro could feel Nami rolling her eyes.

"Sanji," Zoro repeated softly. "Okay um …"

"I'm waiting," Nami said.

"And they call _me_ impatient?" Zoro shook his head. "I don't know what I think of the cook—"

"How is that possible? You're dating him!"

"Okay um … blond," Zoro began. "Fucked up eyebrows, but somewhat not fucked up at the same time … Man that sounds fucked up. Soft lips, talented tongue." Zoro's mind slipped back to that night and he couldn't hold in a moan. "Fuck, _really_ talented tongue. And those lips and that gag reflex—"

"Sanji blew you?!"

Zoro's eyes opened. "You said to think of Sanji," Zoro said, slightly pissed. "I'm following orders."

"I don't need to hear about it," Nami said.

"But you said not to censor or omit anything—"

"I know what I said!"

There was harsh breathing on the other line.

"Nami, does the thought of Sanji going down on me turn you on?"

Silence. Then—

"Zoro Roronoa, I swear I'm going to dismember you and no one will find the body."

"Does Luffy know you're this violent?"

"Zoro!"

"Okay fine, where was I?" So he couldn't think of Sanji's lips in that sense, but that didn't mean he couldn't think of his kisses. "He tastes like nicotine," he mumbled more to himself than Nami. "It's a really strong taste, almost couldn't handle it. He's always got that cigarette in between his lips." Zoro felt rage build up inside of him when he remembered why Sanji smoked. "He's got a crappy lighter though, don't know how old that thing is— Nami you're a fucking genius!"

She was totally smirking, Zoro could tell. "What was that?"

"I'm not saying it again," Zoro snapped, shutting the phone. He felt stupid for not thinking of it sooner and immediately, he called a taxi and got in.

* * *

"That one," Zoro said, pointing towards a black lighter.

"You sure?" asked the man behind the counter. "It's kind of bland."

"It's his favourite colour," Zoro said.

"Sonny, you know black—"

"Isn't a colour, I know. Try telling him that though," he told him through gritted teeth. "Do you know where I can get things engraved?"

The man behind the counter nodded. "We do them here," he said. "What do you want on it?"

Zoro told him.

The man frowned. "We charge per letter you know," he said. "You sure you don't want something shorter?"

"No, it has to be that," Zoro told him with a firm nod of his head. He grinned, able to see the look on Sanji's face when he gave him the gift.

* * *

When Zoro came back to the apartment he realized he had another problem that hadn't even occurred to him, mainly because this problem had never applied to him before.

When he bought Luffy, Nami and Usopp their gifts, he could just keep them anywhere in the apartment, only to shove into the closet when they came over on the occasion. When it came to Sanji's present … Sanji lived with him, which meant that hiding the present was very important. He supposed, since it was so small, he could just shove it in his pocket and keep it there, but then he realized he'd probably forget it was there and then Sanji would do the laundry and then find it and then that wouldn't be a good thing, now would it?

Zoro threw the lighter into the air, watching it spin before he caught it skillfully. It was of course, at that moment, that the door to the apartment opened and in walked Sanji.

"What are you playing with?" he asked curiously.

"Huh?" Zoro asked, turning around and instantly panicking.

 _To hide a present, to hide a present … Fuck, where the hell do I hide the present?_

"Zoro?"

"Eh?" asked Zoro distractedly.

"Oi, are you even listening to me?"

Zoro nodded before shoving the present into his pants. He could probably put it somewhere like his nightstand drawer, right? No one opened that drawer anyway. But would he remember it was there? He shook his head.

"What is it? Yes or no?"

Zoro shook his head again. "Sorry, I was just thinking," he said hurriedly. "So what's up?"

Sanji gave him a strange look before falling down on the couch and lighting up another cigarette. "Nothing, just Nami says we should start the new year off with a bang and really wants us to fight at Partys when it comes. She thinks it'll be the fight of the century." He shook his head. "I swear I saw yen signs in her eyes."

"You watch too much anime," Zoro told him, shaking his head. He collapsed on the couch next to him and smirked. "So, do you think you're up for it? To fight I mean?"

"Well, it's been a while since you've recovered. I guess I wouldn't mind doing it, maybe sometime in early January? I'm definitely not doing it on New Years," Sanji said. "I don't want to start the year off with bruises and a mangled face."

Zoro let out a laugh. "I guess that wouldn't be the best thing, would it?" He shook his head. "So what are we doing for Christmas?"

"Well, I figured we'd spend the day with Luffy and the gang of lunatics," Sanji said "and then … I dunno, the night's up to you, isn't it?"

Zoro nodded when an idea popped into his head. "Let's stay up till midnight."

"Aren't we doing that on New Year's Eve?"

"No, let's do it tonight," Zoro said. "I want to give you my present on Christmas, not nine hours after its started."

"Oh yeah?" asked Sanji with a laugh. "Nine hours? You know I'd be up before that."

"Yeah but I wouldn't be," Zoro reminded him. He bit his lip, almost nervous at his proposition. "So, do you want to?"

"Stay up till midnight, huh?" Sanji asked, letting the smoke circle around him. Zoro remembered faintly in the back of his mind that while reading a book for school, there was a line about people smoking through pipes and how the small puffs of smoke they exhaled looked pretty and swirled around like small clouds. "I'm up for it, sure," Sanji decided. He grinned. "But you better not fall asleep on me Marimo."

* * *

 **Time: 9:30 PM JST**

 **Hours till Christmas: 2 hours and 30 minutes**

* * *

Zoro was bored.

Why did he say they should stay up till midnight again? What was he supposed to do during this time anyway? He lay vertically on the couch, upside down. Anime was stupid in his opinion, it was even more stupid upside down. What was the show this time?

 _Okay, so there's a dog. No, wait, he's human. No, he's not. Wait, he's neither? What kind of fucked up shit is this? Don't people prefer neko stuff? Okay wait, focus. So there's a girl. Why is her skirt so short? Is she a prostitute? She's not pretty enough to be one. Man, her voice is annoying. That's a … that's a kitsune? They call that a_ ** _kitsune_** _? Fuck that's messed up. Did that monk just grope her? Why does that girl have a giant boomerang?_

"Sanji?" he called to the man in the kitchen.

"What is it Zoro?" He knew that Sanji didn't mean to sound pissed, he was just very concentrated on the meal he was making. He was pretty determined to have them eat a giant feast since it was going to be Christmas. Sanji really spoiled him, didn't he? How would he repay his kindness? "Sanji, why's that guy got a hole in his hand?" Okay, insulting his anime sounded about right.

There was a sigh. "That's Miroku, he's cursed."

"Well I figured your life can't be that great if you've got a giant hole in your hand that looks like it's going to suck in the world. And why's that weird guy in the hakama breaking that girl's alarm clock? Is that Feudal Japan or is it normal Tokyo?" He shook his head. The blood was starting to rush to his head, just a little. "This art kinda reminds me of that other show you watch, the one with the guy who's confused about his gender—"

"He's not confused, he's also cursed."

"Why are there so many cursed people in this stuff you watch?"

Sanji's footsteps approached him and Zoro knew he had turned off the stove and was about to defend all of his favourite anime characters. Oh fun. He liked seeing Sanji angry though, it was pretty hot so he continued as he heard his footsteps approach. "And then there was that El guy and Ned, right? They're also cursed, cause El doesn't have a body and Ned's missing a few limbs. Oh! And then there's that Sanosuke guy, right? He's got weird marks all over him and Ichigo has the weird ass tattoo on his stomach, right? Oh! What about that rubber man? What was his name? Fluffy?"

Sanji shook his head. "Sit up, idiot. You're going to pass out."

Now that Sanji mentioned it, he was starting to feel a bit light headed. Zoro sat up properly again.

"Okay, first of all, the cursed guy who turns into a girl is Ranma, that's cause he ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time and fell into the Chinese cursed spring of the drowned girl."

"So wait, does that mean he has to worry about that blood stuff like … coming out?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "That's not the point! Anyway, that's Ranma. The one who made _Ranma 1/2_ and _InuYasha_ were the same person, so of course the art is similar. It's _Al_ and _Ed_ , Sanosuke is from somewhere else, it's Sasuke, and Ichigo is also from somewhere else, it's Naruto. And as for the rubber man—"

"Yeah yeah," Zoro said, cutting him off. "You like your anime. Does that mean you're still like, what, twelve or something?"

"Hey, at least I don't watch crap like _Pokémon_ filled with pre-pubescent boys who refuse to age while everyone else around them grows older."

"Hey, that's Ash, right? I liked him!"

Sanji sighed. "Dinner's almost ready, get yourself cleaned up and I'll feed you."

Zoro stared down at his current attire. He was wearing a pair of jeans with a few tears in them and a black shirt. He had kicked off his shoes already and was wearing the customary slippers. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Suit up!"

"I don't own a suit," Zoro reminded him. He headed for the kitchen anyway when Sanji beat him to it and blocked his path. "Sanji, move."

"No."

"You're being childish."

"Said by the one supporting Ash Ketchum."

"Hey, he's got a cool hat!"

Sanji shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Honestly, so childi—Zoro, what are you doing?!"

Zoro pulled Sanji closer by his blazer before pushing him up against the doorframe of the kitchen. He faintly knew his cigarette was falling. It hit the floor with a hiss but Zoro was focusing on other things. With his hands on either side of Sanji's head, he just leaned down to close the space. Gently running his tongue along the Sanji's lips, the cook opened his mouth slowly, one of his hands reaching up and holding Zoro's neck angling it so that it was easier for him.

Zoro swore he could get addicted to Sanji's kisses, if he wasn't already. The taste of nicotine, spices and Sanji on his tongue, bitter with a tad of sweetness. Not too sweet, not too sour. Sanji still had no idea how to kiss, he was under no illusion that Sanji was good at this, but it was the tentative way that he responded to his touches that made Zoro as happy as he was when he kissed him. It was the way he seemed to mould under his touch, cave in as much as Zoro did to him when he kissed him. He was so responsive and he tried his best, it was the raw want that he could feel Sanji conveying to him through his kisses that really made Zoro's head spin. No kiss had ever been like the ones Sanji gave him, not even ones from _her_.

Before he could get himself too caught up in the kiss, Zoro pulled away, trying his hardest to ignore the smallest trace of a whimper coming from Sanji, though he was sure that the cook didn't know he had done it and would deny it if ever pressed on the subject. He entered the kitchen and took a seat at the table.

"That was dirty," Sanji accused.

"I didn't hear you complaining," Zoro said with a smirk.

"I didn't have much of a choice, now did I?"

Zoro gave him a smile. "Sit down and eat, Curly Brow."

* * *

 **Time: 10:26 PM JST**

 **Hours till Christmas: 1 hour and 34 minutes**

* * *

They had eaten their dinner in silence and were cleaning up, their usual routine of Zoro drying and Sanji cleaning, when Sanji spoke.

"You know … I've never had a Christmas like this," he said softly.

Zoro stayed silent, sure that if Sanji wanted to talk, he would.

"The … the orphanage didn't really care that much about stuff like that. I mean I think we used to have this really horrible looking Christmas tree with a star on top but by the time the day was over, some kid would steal it." He let out a hollow laugh. "And you know how the cooks are, they aren't the type to be all holly and jolly during Christmas. Zeff would give me something for the holiday though, but he'd never really do give it to me, you know? He's just kind of leave it in the house and when I woke up, I'd see it. One year, he actually gave it to me when I came back from getting the groceries and he just kind of … shoved it at me before telling me to get back to work." He shrugged. "I don't know, it's just … nice, you know? To do something like this."

"Hey, it isn't even Christmas yet," Zoro told him softly. "You're never going to have to deal with those shitty excuses for a holiday anymore. This'll be the best fucking Christmas ever," he said with a grin.

"There's not much to beat," Sanji said. "It's already better than I thought," he confessed. He turned his head away from Zoro, scrubbing at a dish forcefully.

He was very silent as they continued but it wasn't until Zoro had dried about four more plates and their glasses that he had nothing to dry and he could hear Sanji's scrubbing on a platter that he heard it. It was soft, almost impossible to hear it, but Sanji … Sanji was crying.

Zoro thought for a moment before he spoke. "Hey Sanji?"

"Hmm?" responded the blond. It sounded strained.

"Have you ever had eggnog?"

Sanji looked at him and Zoro's heart broke. He could see the tear tracks running down Sanji's face, but the fresh ones had stopped. How long had he been crying while Zoro was right there, next to him? "Eggnog?" repeated Sanji, his voice cracking slightly.

Zoro wondered how long it took for Sanji to learn to cry silently, almost as though it weren't happening. It must have taken years. That he had to learn to cry in silence was heart breaking enough, but to see it for himself, that Sanji thought he couldn't cry in front of Zoro … "Yeah, eggnog," he said softly. "It's a drink." He kept his voice quiet and gentle. He didn't want Sanji to suffer, if it was from his past, injuries or anything at all. Zoro wasn't an idiot, he knew he couldn't erase the past. He couldn't undo all the horrors Sanji had braved, but that didn't mean he couldn't try to distract him. He could give him at least five new memories that were beautiful and wonderful for each of the bad until they were almost forgotten. He could do that much for Sanji. "You want to make it?"

Sanji didn't sniffle, nor did he wipe his face. It was as though he wanted to pretend he hadn't even been crying in the first place, which meant there was no evidence that needed to be erased. "Okay," he said softly.

Zoro flashed him a smile.

"Okay," he said just as softly.

* * *

 **Time: 10:40 PM JST**

 **Hours till Christmas: 1 hour and 20 minutes**

* * *

After they finished cleaning up all the dishes, they were about to dirty more. "It's not that complicated," Zoro told him. "My old man taught me to make it when I was like, eight or something. I don't need a stove or anything, it should be simple."

Sanji let out a light laugh. "Suddenly you're teaching me?" he asked with a laugh.

Zoro blushed. "Well, the teacher becomes the student, doesn't he? It was bound to happen."

Zoro took out a carton of eggs. "Okay, we're going to make six servings, so we need four eggs. You can beat them, if you want."

Sanji nodded. "I may as well crack them too," he said. "Knowing your egg cracking skills."

"I only had one hand at the time!" Zoro said, rolling his eyes. He cracked two eggs into bowl skilfully before throwing the eggshells into the sink. "You can crack the last two."

Sanji nodded, though he looked slightly amazed that Zoro had managed.

"I'm not completely incompetent," he said, rolling his eyes. Pulling out the milk, he asked Sanji to get the vanilla extract and sugar, along with ground nutmeg. Zoro himself got the measuring spoons and measuring cup. "Okay, we need six tablespoons of sugar, four and two third cups of the low-fat milk and a two teaspoons of the vanilla extract. Simple enough?"

"Another fraction?" Sanji teased. "You sure you can handle it?"

"Shut up," Zoro snapped teasingly.

It was amazing watching Sanji cook as always. As simple as the recipe was— just pour everything into the bowl, mix it and then cool it— he was still completely immersed in it. Whatever memories that had haunted him before seemed to be long-forgotten, at least for now. Zoro was beyond glad that he could keep Sanji's demons at bay.

Once it was done, they put it in the fridge to cool it and took a seat at the table.

"So you've really never had eggnog?"

"No," Sanji said. "I've made fancy eggnog beer or something like that, since the recipe's a bit familiar to me, but I've never had it myself." He shrugged. "But you don't like sugar—"

"I don't like overly-sweet things," Zoro corrected him. "There's a difference. Besides, who doesn't like eggnog?"

Sanji raised his hand.

"That's cause you've never tried it, idiot," Zoro told him.

Sanji laughed lightly. "So anyway Zoro … do you have any New Year resolutions?"

"Huh?"

"You know like, I will not do this, I will do this, stuff like that," Sanji said, shrugging.

"You read _Bridget Jones' Diary_?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "You're into chick-books?"

"I saw the movie," Sanji corrected.

"That doesn't mean anything, that just makes it worse. You watched a chick-flick." He shook his head. "Oh God, I'm dating a gay guy!"

Sanji frowned. "I don't think I'm gay exactly," he said slowly, "since I've been fawning over girls since just about forever … maybe I'm just bisexual." He shrugged. "Besides, you can' exactly date a straight guy, can you? Anyway, do you have any New Years resolutions?"

Zoro thought about it. Did he really have any? "I guess, I mean, no one doesn't have any, right?"

"That sounds like a double negative."

"Only because I said the word 'no' and the word 'doesn't', that doesn't mean it was a double negative," Zoro said. "And besides, I'm the grammar Nazi, not you." He rolled his eyes. "What are your resolutions?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "Um, mine never seem to change," he said softly. "You know how it is, you come up with a resolution that you swear you're going to follow and then you just break the second it's 12:01." He shrugged. "They're nothing big."

"Come on, tell me. A lot's happened this year, surely your resolutions have changed at least a little," Zoro said.

Sanji nodded. "I guess it's okay …" He took a deep breath. "Well, the first one is always the same. I'm going to manage to sound like a normal sensible human being in front of women." He laughed. "We're really busy on New Year's Eve, so the second I make that resolution, I end up in the dining hall and it goes out the window. Um, I also say I'll learn how to make Zeff's top secret recipe for pie, but that never happens. He keeps that recipe looked up inside his head and never shares it to anyone. I tell myself I'm going to read the large book that Zeff bought me for my twelfth birthday, but I just look at the cover and get bored. It's some story in Latin. The back says something about some idiot who goes off on a journey to discover himself … it's pretty dumb." He shrugged. "I say I'm going to get regular hours of sleep, but then I end up cleaning the kitchen and falling asleep on the floor … I tell myself I'll learn how to thank Zeff properly for everything he's done, but I can never think of something great enough and by the time I think of something that's good enough, he does something else that makes it so that whatever I have planned has to be grander and I'm back at the drawing boards." He shrugged. Zoro wondered if Sanji knew the way his eyes lit up when he was talking about Zeff. He really admired him, clearly. "I don't know, they're all dumb ones."

"Oh yeah?" Zoro asked. "Come on, there has to be some that have changed. You aren't at the Baratie anymore, which means that you don't have to worry about that. You'll get normal hours, you've spoken to Nami pretty sensibly, so you're on the right path."

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "Well, there is one more. It's not really a New Year's resolution, it's more of just a resolution in general but …" He turned his head away. "I … I told myself I'd stop … stop the scars …"

Zoro froze. Did that mean—?

"I said I'd hold off on the pain … that I'd try to stop completely with the knives in … _that way_ …" He didn't seem to be embarrassed by it, rather he looked ashamed. "I told myself I wouldn't be that weak, that I didn't need it anymore … I've told myself I'm damaged enough so … there's no reason to deliver anymore blows. Not by … not by my own hands …"

"Sanji?" Zoro said softly.

"Hmm?" asked Sanji. He wasn't crying, but he was close, his voice strained.

"You're not damaged," he told him. "You're wounded. Remember those flowers?" he asked. "Healing and hope. You're getting better Sanji, you are."

Sanji nodded slowly. "Um … how long till its ready?" he asked, trying to distract Zoro.

"I will stop drinking."

Sanji gave him a strange look.

"But then I saw a bottle of sake and it was stupid not to drink in the New Year, right?" Zoro shook his head with a laugh. "I'm better now though. I will not lose my temper. That went out the window when Nami shouted I was drinking all her expensive wine. I will not scream at people who are still singing _the Little Drummer Boy_ in the middle of May. Believe it or not, people do that and then by that point in the year, I've forgotten it was even on my list."

Sanji smiled. "What else?"

"Hmm, good question. I will get better friends, who don't end up in jail, that's always on there, but eventually, they do something at makes me think they're not that bad and then once I've secluded myself to the point where it's impossible to make friends that year, they're in jail again so yeah …" He chuckled. "I will get Nami to stop gambling. That's mission impossible anyway though. I will train every day, that seems to be the only resolution I manage to keep. I won't watch that crappy drama that's on its fifth season for some reason … They have a New Year special every year and that's gone too. I will figure out how to drive to Luffy's house without getting lost. It never works. I won't scare children on Halloween, but that's got nothing to do with me, they're always screaming monster or something." He shrugged. "They're weird."

"You have a pretty intimidating scowl," Sanji pointed out. "You should smile more, you look less vicious."

Zoro snorted. "Oh yeah? Give me something to smile about."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Anything else?"

"I usually tell myself I'll dye my hair so people stop asking me if I'm the Grinch."

Sanji laughed. "Seriously?"

"That and Ebenezer Scrooge, they say that too." Zoro shrugged. "Christmas was never really my holiday."

"What makes this year different?"

Zoro bit his lip and turned away, trying to hide his blush. "You're here."

"You sound like a stupid sap when you say that," said Sanji in a soft voice.

"Yeah well—"

"I didn't say I didn't like it," Sanji cut him off. He gave him a gentle smile and Zoro's furrowed brow smoothened as he began to smile. "But if you dye your hair, I swear I'm killing you."

Zoro laughed.

* * *

 **Time: 11:58 PM JST**

 **Hours till Christmas: 2 minutes**

* * *

"This is fucking amazing!"

Zoro smirked as Sanji drank his eggnog for the first time. He clearly liked it, if the way his eyes widened and seemed to glow was any indication. "Yeah?" Zoro asked. "Don't you feel depraved now?"

Sanji nodded. "This is fucking amazing!"

"You already said that," Zoro pointed out.

"Fuck you Marimo, I'm allowed to repeat things if I want."

Zoro laughed. "Alright then Curly Brow." He stared at the clock, checking. It was almost Christmas.

Sanji turned on the TV, putting his eggnog down.

"I thought you said it was fucking amazing, you're ditching it all of a sudden?" Zoro teased.

"Shut up, there's a _Pokémon_ Christmas special on," Sanji snapped. And of course, this caused Zoro to laugh because really, wasn't it Sanji who had been making fun of him for watching Pokémon?

"Merry Christmas, Sanji."

Sanji gave him a strange look when he looked at the digital clock on the mantle piece. It was twelve o'clock. "Merry Christmas, Marimo," he said softly.

Immediately, Zoro jumped up from the couch. "Alright, present time!"

"But the special just started," Sanji argued.

"Deal with it!" Zoro told him. "Record it, tape it whatever. I'll watch it with you later when we get back from Luffy's annual Christmas party," he said.

"You will?" Sanji asked in surprise.

"Yeah, I will," Zoro said. There was a moment of silence between them, sweet and almost romantic before Zoro jumped again. "Now go get my present and then get your ass back here."

Sanji rolled his eyes and went off to get Zoro his gift while Zoro pulled the lighter out of his pocket, rolling it over in the palm of his hand. His fingers ran over the engraving and he couldn't help the smile that surfaced on his lips.

"Who goes first?" asked Sanji as he reentered the living room.

"I'll go first, I suppose," Zoro said. He already had it in his hand anyway. He held it out to Sanji who smirked.

"No wrapping?"

"You should be grateful, my wrapping skills are atrocious."

Sanji laughed and turned the lighter over. "I've been in need of a new one," he said in a soft voice. His eyes widened when he spotted the engraving.

 _Merry X-Mas, from Marimo_

Sanji's breath seemed to be caught in his throat as he stared at the lighter. He held it tightly in his hand before wrapping his arms around Zoro's neck, pulling him close to him in a tight hug. "Zoro …" He sounded like he was on the verge of tears again, but Zoro knew this time they were happy tears. Sanji let go and Zoro felt he missed Sanji's warmth, but he just gave him a smile.

"You better use it," he told him with a firm scowl that was only half-hearted.

"Ahou, why wouldn't I?"

Sanji bit his lip. "I feel kind of bad though now, since you gave me something so thoughtful and when it came down to it, I knew I couldn't beat what I had gotten you for your birthday …" Sanji's cheek flushed red and pulled out a nicely wrapped box. "I considered this other present but it was really stupid, so I sent it back. I had to ask Nami for some help for it and it kinda makes me think its more of a gag than anything but …"

Zoro unwrapped the gift without a care in the world. He really didn't care what Sanji had gotten him. From his life in the Baratie, Zoro figured that Sanji didn't buy many Christmas gifts. Maybe for Moodie and Zeff, which meant that it took a lot for Sanji to get him a gift for Christmas. He was honoured that Sanji had even thought to give him something.

It was a GPS.

Immediately, Zoro started to laugh.

"I know it's stupid," Sanji muttered, "I kept the bill, you can return it—"

"I love it," Zoro said, trying to breathe through his laughter. "It's fine Sanji, I love it," he repeated with a bright smile on his face.

Sanji let out a sigh of relief that was almost hidden, but Zoro saw it because his only focus was on Sanji. It had been that way a lot recently.

Zoro pulled Sanji to him, kissing him softly. Mouth against mouth, a gentle motion that was innocent and held the slightest hint of hesitance, reminding Zoro of his first kiss with Sanji. When he pulled away, he blushed. "Mistletoe," he blurted out. "There was uh … mistletoe."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "There's no mistletoe in the entire building," Sanji told him. "If we're boyfriends, you shouldn't need a fucking reason to kiss me, especially not such a shitty one like that!"

Zoro blinked. "Are we boyfriends?" He just remembered telling Nami that he and Sanji weren't boyfriends, they were just dating. You could do that, date someone and yet not actually be their "boyfriend" or "girlfriend".

Sanji sighed and rolled his eyes. Zoro wanted to tell him if he kept doing that, they'd get stuck that way, but he refrained. "Are we really doing this?" he asked.

"Yeah," Zoro told him. "We're really doing this. Are we boyfriends?"

"Fine," Sanji said, crossing his arms. He seemed to think for a while before saying, "Do I annoy you?"

"All the time," Zoro blurted out by accident, but it didn't seem like Sanji cared that Zoro had just answered the affirmative.

"Do you stay with me when I ask?"

"Um, yeah …?" Zoro frowned, confused. Sure he stayed with the cook in the kitchen at pointless times when he could've been napping or training, but what did that have to do with anything? "So what?"

Sanji acted as though he hadn't heard him. "Can you stand to sit in silence with me?"

"Yes, but you're not explaining anything so—"

"Do you listen to me?"

"I'm listening to you now," Zoro said, getting a bit frustrated, "but you're not listening to—"

"No, I mean when I have a problem, you listen to them, don't you?" Sanji asked, giving him a look that clearly stated he didn't want Zoro questioning him, so obediently, Zoro gave him a one-worded answer.

"Yeah."

"We go grocery shopping together, right?"

"Yeah, we've been doing that for months now," Zoro pointed out.

"Do you give me a kiss when you say goodbye?"

"What is this, another round of Twenty Questions?" Zoro looked at him strangely. "I don't always, but …"

"It's a yes or no question."

Zoro sighed. "Yes."

"Then yeah, we're in a relationship. At least, according to the Internet," Sanji said with a shrug.

Zoro stared at Sanji strangely. "I wonder what you do in your spare time …"

"I figured since you said we were dating, then we were boyfriends but I guess now it's official," said Sanji. "Are you okay with that?" he asked as though as an after thought but the crease in his brow showed how much he wanted Zoro to tell him the truth, and he wanted the truth to be that he was fine with it.

"Yeah, that's cool," Zoro said slowly. "So what, now we're official?"

Sanji nodded, seeming to roll on the balls of his feet, teetering. "Yeah, guess so …"

There was silence as Zoro thought it over.

 _Boyfriend. Sanji's my boyfriend and I'm his. I like the sound of that. Boyfriend. Wait—_

"Fuck, does that mean our anniversary is going to be Christmas?"

"Anniversary?" Sanji repeated. He smirked. "What makes you think you can keep me until next Christmas?"

And that was all Zoro needed to know he was never letting this amazing, mischievous cook go. Not even if he begged him to.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Okay the thank-yous!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : Thank you? I guess? I'm not sure, does saying it's not crappy constitute as a compliment? I don't always read smut either, I mean I like a dash of it, I like everything in a dash I realize. Like I'll read a story regardless of rating and if there's a bit of smut in there, okay, sure. Pointless stories with just smut, I can't imagining writing one, though I might, cause of the idea of writing about Zoro walking in on Sanji masturbating ... but anyway, I was writing that scene when this person just came into my room and I was like, "calm, cool, is my face red?" and yeah ..._

 _takafumi (x2) : Okay am I the only one who had a heart-attack when I found like, 5 episodes for season 3 of **Junjou Romantica** subbed? I was totally freaking out! Though, I think I've decided that Miyagi and Shinobu are my favourite couple from there. It's just cause Shinobu is as awkward as I am so he's like, 10 times cuter to me. Plus, they had English in their story! I just remember the comments on YouTube where everyone's like "Oh my God, not fair! They're awesome, they're cute, they're adorable, they're smart and now they can talk English?!" and I have to admit, I thought their accents were pretty funny, but I know I sound stupid when I try to speak Japanese, so what can I do? I have taken to calling my friends "baka" though ... and more recently, "ahou". Also, would that takafumi be any reference to Takafumi Yokozawa? (I'm writing that last name with no reference, I might've spelt it wrong ...)_

 _versora : Hey, so yeah, I was thinking and realized Sanji did REALLY well with the sword and then totally went, "Oh shit, now what can he do for him?" and so it ended up being like that ... Yup. Plus, it was 22 chapters after being raped, which I have to say, that's pretty good, he waited a long time. I mean, I thought about how he must've been feeling and I made sure he wasn't over-excited or anything. I tried to make it realistic. I'm not saying Sanji's blowjob was great, I bet it could use some work, but Zoro's a sexual frustrated Marimo who hasn't gotten any in really long so ... yeah. And it's Sanji, this guy he's falling in love with. I just thought about the scenario and was like, "if I were to watch this, what would be the cutest thing I could see?" because they were just so sweet in that scene. I don't like how when I read yaoi, it's either totally rough, or totally sweet and no communications like at all, except for the warning that they're entering the other person. I wanted it to be humbling and yeah, they're probably out of character for it but I swear, my teeth rotted on the sweetness. So yeah, I hope it was good for you ... (wow, I swear I wasn't this perverted my whole life, but that really seemed like an innuendo... High school tainted me. I was the most innocent person in the world before I entered it. Dammit, another innuendo ... I'm just going to stop)_

 _Raigon : I didn't want full-blown sex, cause you're right, that would be too soon, but I thought it was a good place to put it since they developed and build up a nice relationship. It was also to show that Sanji's healing, he's getting better and he's starting to think that that sort of intimacy isn't always the way the cooks made him do it._

 _crystalbluefox : I've only ever heard of that in stories, I swear! They seriously tried to get you a date? Wow. My family says they don't care about sexuality, they're just like, "I don't care if you're a hippie, a hobo, or a homo, just bring in money!" Course, they're joking but still. You have no idea how many conversations we have where my parents are just like, "so when you get married, who do you imagine at the alter? Are they male?" and I'm always just like, "Uh, Mom? I'm not a lesbian." At least, I don't think I am. I remember when I told my friend I was going to an all-girls school, he was like, "So, does that mean you're a lesbo now?" I attacked him with a hose the next summer. (VICTORY! Sorry, I'm weird). Since I've never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend for that matter, I'm pretty sure only fictional people work for me, then again, I'm really dedicated to school so that means I won't really be trying to find anyone for a long time. I'll be holing myself up in my room all year, studying, doing homework and writing fanfictions. Such is the life of a studious otaku (my friends say I'm insulting myself using that term. I don't care if I use it on myself, but I do hate how my friend called me a weeabo, I don't even know if I spelt that right)._

 _Ayamichan34 : I always feel every time I show Nami, I'm making her too aggressive or something, but I hate dormant and non-active female characters. I used to write stories that always focused on a female lead but the first story that was properly planned had a main cast of mainly boys. Still, I keep all my female characters strong and independent. I also make all my genius characters blond. I think that's my way of saying blonds aren't dumb, even if I already know that ..._

 _Wow I write long answers to reviews ... Heh heh..._

 _Well, okay so yeah, it was Nowaki from **Junjou Romantica** , or rather, **Junjou Egoist.** He's here again! Welcome him with open arms please! He's adorable!_

 _Okay, now my question which I mentioned earlier: I kinda went crazy with all of the references. I want to know if you caught them all. If you can, list all of the references that were made in this chapter (that means any titles that were mentioned, any allusions towards other things, anime or not anime.) I know, I'm so Englishing this story, even though I wanted to set it in Japan. I feel like a horrible person._

 _Well, I hope you guys review! I have a chapter ready for you guys, so if I get at least 5 reviews, I'll update as soon as I can. I kinda think the fact that there's such an odd number of chapters (pun somewhat intended, I'm very punny, I know, I'm a horrible person), is really pissing me off. Could we try for like, I dunno, an even number? I like multiples of 5. Wow, that's like begging for reviews ... Now I really feel bad._

 _If anyone's interested in this story's playlist, I'd be happy to send you some of the songs (they're not all relevant since the story hasn't progressed far enough, the playlist is ahead of the story itself, heh ... heh ...) so tell me if you want some of them!_


	28. Play Fighting

_**Author's Note:** Okay, so something I'm going to do now besides say I don't own **One Piece** or **Titanic** , I will warn you of this: it's not sexual content so much as I kinda ended up making this a bit more dramatic then I had intended. Chapter 29 is written, and if you'd believe it, it's at least 11 000 words long and I swear, I didn't mean to do that. So basically, if you guys give me a nice amount of reviews (maybe I could have a total sum of reviews of 175?), you'll get a giant update for you. I did not mean for this to get so emotional, I swear, I didn't. I also pardon for my strange way of writing fight scenes when it comes to Zoro and Sanji. The thing is every time I write one, I'm always thinking, "I know Sanji's good and capable, but how does Zoro deliver blows without chopping him up into smithereens?" Because we like Sanji whole, not in boxed up packages._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster  
_** _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 28: Play Fighting

* * *

"Hello boys, why are you here today?" asked the barmaid with a bright smile on her face. She eyed Zoro's swords. "Are you here to fight?"

"Yeah," said Zoro.

Makino nodded. "Well, there are some good opponents down there today so—"

"Oh, I'm not fighting them," Zoro said, cutting her off. He ignored Sanji telling him it was beyond rude to interrupt a lady and continued. "I'm fighting him," he gestured towards Sanji. "Nami's been getting on our backs for it for the past while," he explained. "So we figured we'd start the new year off with a bang."

Makino gave him a strange look. "But it's already the second week of January."

"Yes but, see, the Marimo here," Sanji gestured towards Zoro, "didn't want to be all bloody for the first week."

"As if you could beat me," Zoro scoffed.

"We'll see," Sanji teased back. "Can we go down?"

Makino nodded with a big grin. "Stay safe boys!"

"We will!" Sanji told her and they descended the stairs.

The moment the two were visible by Yosaku and Johnny, they quickly ushered them inside and the swordsman and cook were greeted by Nami almost immediately.

"So?" she pressed.

"So what?" asked Zoro in a gruff voice.

Sanji rolled his eyes at Zoro's inability to be chivalrous. "Good evening Nami, Zoro and I are here ready to fight, as you asked of us?" He sent her a grin. "We're ready when you are."

"How can you just tell her something like that?" demanded Zoro.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "I think she deserves to know," he pointed out. "Anyway," he said, ignoring Zoro's scowl, "when do you want us to fight?"

"Well, Luffy's in the middle of a fight right now, so once he's done I suppose," she replied. She looked giddy, as though all of her dreams had come true. "I can't believe you guys are actually going to fight!" She seemed to squeal. "This is going to the be the fight of the century!"

Zoro rolled his eyes, but Sanji dragged him to their usual table and sat down.

"Come on, it won't be that bad," Sanji said. "We just need to have fun, that's all."

"Good luck having fun when I bash your face in," Zoro said with a playful grin.

"What makes you think I'll lay down easily?" Sanji asked.

"Oh, it's on cook!" Zoro said, a big smile spreading across his face.

He swore, Zoro's smile was infectious and that was why he looked like an idiot at that moment when Luffy got away from the crowd and patted Sanji on the back proudly. Zoro went off to mentally prepare himself and Sanji realized something. This would be the first time he saw Zoro fight for a reason other than training. He was kind of excited.

"You going to be okay with this?"

Sanji looked at Luffy strangely. "What do you mean?"

"I mean Zoro's really competitive, he won't care if you're a friend or an enemy, he goes all out. And plus, you're in a relationship, aren't you?"

Sanji nodded. "It's fine, you're worrying too much Luffy," he assured him. "I respect Zoro as a swordsman, rival and adversary. It'd be stupid to take him on without knowing what he's capable of, I know exactly what I'm getting into. But Luffy, you forgot something." Sanji turned to him with a wide grin. "Zoro may be a tough fighter and a brilliant swordsman, but he's also the one who trained me. I'll be fine."

Luffy nodded, as though thoroughly convinced that everything was going to be fine. He grinned and gave Sanji a thumbs up before sitting down next to Nami to watch the fight.

Though Sanji had just relaxed Luffy, he now felt tense as he stepped into the ring. He breathed and grinned at Ace, probably looking more confident than he felt. He could not deny that Zoro was an amazing fighter, that was impossible to say without being a complete and utter liar and Sanji wasn't going to become Usopp. At the same time though, he liked to think he and Zoro were on even ground, both putting in the same amount of effort into their fights and trying to one-up each other with an equal amount of struggle. He liked to think he was a bit of a challenge for the green-haired man.

"Tonight," said Ace in a loud voice, "we are here to see the fight of the century!"

The entire crowd cheered and Sanji gave Zoro a look, who was watching him from his corner of the arena. They exchanged smirks. Nami knew how to advertise.

"We have Zoro, a returning champion, master of Santoryu, three-sword style. He's tough, he's strong, he's agile, he kinda reminds me of a ballerina at times—"

"Ace," Zoro said through gritted teeth, warning him.

"And in the other corner," Ace said changing topic, but not before quickly sending Zoro a wink, "we have Sanji! Now you must know this blond, he's impressed us since his first fight against the great Captain Luffy and even in pointless bar fights, has come out victorious with style. Neither man has lost a battle." Sanji didn't want to mention how Zoro's encounter with Mihawk had injured him and landed him in the hospital and it seemed Zoro wasn't in the mood to correct him either. "Now, Sanji, or rather, Blackleg Sanji as we've come to call him, has never fought against an armed opponent before, as far as we know," said Ace. "Which could make this fight a little hard on him, however, a fact that is little known to others is that this swordsman and this savate master are roommates!"

Both Zoro and Sanji sent Ace a look. The entire crowd seemed rather interested in this fact and Sanji swore once the match was over, he was going to fucking kill Ace. He was pretty sure he and Zoro were on the same page.

"So perhaps this match won't be easy on this green-haired man's conscious." Ace grinned, far too happily for a man who was being glared at by Partys two most fierce fighters. "Now, let's revise the rules once more. Our little tangerine has requested special rules for this fight. Unlike the other fights, you boys are allowed free reign of the bar. If you want to take it into the stands, go nuts. Or so she says. Still though, this is not a death match, so please, no aiming for vital organs, we'd like to refrain from having to send one of you two to the hospital." He gave Zoro a look before continuing. "However, another point where this match differs from the others is the following: the crowd has no say in when this match will end. We are no longer the ones who determine whether or not the match is over, the match ends when either one of you two are knocked unconscious or until one of you surrender."

Sanji and Zoro scoffed at the thought.

Ace grinned as though to say he knew that would be their reaction. "Now, shall we?"

The entire crowd began to count down from three and the last thing Sanji heard clearly was Ace's voice booming, screaming, "FIGHT!"

The first attack, Sanji didn't even see coming. It went straight for his head and he had to duck, missing it by a second. He frowned. "Hey, bastard, you got my cigarette!" he yelled. His cigar had fallen out due to his surprise and was now no longer usable. "Fucking Marimo!" he shouted, before aiming a kick for his stomach.

The swordsman saw it, read it and instantly reacted. He blocked it with Sandai and, to Sanji's joy, Shusui. He grinned. "Nice sword, where'd you get it?"

"Oh you know," Zoro said with a shrug, his smirk as powerful with a sword in his mouth as it was without. "Just a little present."

Sanji laughed and jumped back from him. It didn't even feel like fighting, more like they were … playing with each other.

Zoro had a mischievous glint in his eyes.

 _Read him, what's he doing? Focus. Focus Sanji._

Zoro's swords were crossed over his chest. So he was planning on striking that way, huh?

Sanji jumped out of the way, landing on a table. He didn't want to disturb those who were eating, or rather, drinking seeing as it didn't seem anything solid was going down anyone's mouth at this hour. Though they were given free control over the downstairs basement, he didn't want to rack up a bill. He jumped back into the ring and went to attack Zoro in the face.

"And he misses by a mere millimetre!"

That was Ace.

Sanji's head reeled to see Ace with a megaphone. "What's Blackleg doing now?" asked the older brother. He seemed to be laughing at him.

Blackleg … Sanji liked the name.

He only just caught the sound of Zoro's sword swinging and skidded back. "Your fight's over here," said Zoro with a grin on his face.

"Wouldn't want it any other way," Sanji told him with a smirk.

"What's this? Now Blackleg's attacking with consecutive blows to the stomach! Is the great Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro being forced onto the defence?"

Sanji gave Zoro a look. "Pirate hunter?" he repeated, blocking an attack from Zoro's sword.

"Luffy's idea," he replied. "Shouldn't you pay more attention to me?"

"And look at that, Zoro's taken the lead back!"

Sanji ducked, avoiding a blow to his head. Zoro, caught off balance, teetered forward. Sanji kicked him in the back. Just when he thought Zoro would hit the floor, the man's hands came out to stop himself and he used the floor to push himself up again. He went to attack Sanji with all three swords in a special style attack, obviously, but with the way Sanji managed to dodge and evade, he only got a nick on the shoulder.

"Marimo! I just got this shirt fixed!" Sanji snapped, kicking harshly at Zoro's legs, trying to catch him off balance again.

It didn't work. "It's a shitty shirt anyway!"

"The fighters seemed to have taken to insulting each other while brawling!"

"SHUT UP!" both Zoro and Sanji snapped at the man.

"Oh, am I in trouble?" came Ace's voice with a chuckle.

No, it wouldn't do well to get distracted. Sanji could tune Ace out, it couldn't be that hard. Dropping himself to the floor, Sanji used his hands to sturdy himself as he made a forceful kick that got Zoro right in the gut. If Zoro were a normal person, he'd probably have fallen down, but Zoro _wasn't_ a normal person and instead, he just staggered back.

He gripped his swords tighter and went to strike at Sanji. It took Sanji a moment to get himself back on his feet, but that was all Zoro needed to sweep underneath his feet and throw him off balance.

Sanji hit the floor, the wind knocked out of him. His chest tightened once more as Zoro went to attack him, to slice at Sanji, when Sanji used his feet to kick forcefully and he watched as one of his feet connected with the blade of Sandai. With a forceful push, the sword came out of Zoro's hand and embedded itself into the wall between a couple who had previously been making out.

"Sorry," Sanji apologized as he tried to stand, but just as he was getting up, Zoro jumped on him, trapping him on the ground.

Sanji wasn't going to lie. The swordsman was heavy.

With the wind knocked out of him, he tried to breathe and found he was having trouble. He was having a lot of trouble, actually. He tried to manoeuvre himself underneath him, but Zoro had him caught, grabbing his legs tightly. Sanji squirmed, but Zoro wouldn't let go.

"Fucking bastard," Sanji said through gritted teeth.

Zoro smirked. "Ditto."

Sanji rolled his hips forward, causing Zoro to freeze. His grip on Sanji didn't loosen, in fact, it tightened. Using his upper body strength, Sanji forced himself up so that he was in a sitting position. He then placed his arms a fair distance behind his head before thrusting upwards with his hips, trying to lift himself off the ground. Zoro was gritting his teeth and Sanji could tell this position was causing Zoro to get distracted.

Zoro's full weight and pressure on him was lifted temporarily and that was all it took for Sanji to flip himself over, his legs lifting and landing where his hands were in a way that was almost unnatural. Correction: it _was_ unnatural. Zoro, still trying to hold on, was thrown against the floor harshly. As Sanji stood up and dusted off his pants, Zoro looked at him from the floor, starting to get up. He wiped his mouth where blood was leaking out of his bleeding lip. He grinned. "See, I told you, your flexibility."

Sanji tried his hardest not to blush. He would not be outed in front of a bunch of strangers. With this newfound goal to shut Zoro up, he forcefully kicked at him but Zoro dodged it with a clean jump backwards onto a table.

"Ahou!" Sanji snapped. "Don't you remember the tab?"

"We can pay for it," Zoro replied, jumping to a new table as Sanji tried to kick him. "Besides, we've got free reign, remember?"

"I can't tell if they're fighting or playing," Sanji heard someone say from their seat.

"I think they're … flirting?" one of them said in a confused voice.

Zoro had backed up three tables and the drinks and such were being thrown onto the ground. Sanji was surprised he hadn't accidentally stepped on someone's fingers. Sanji was about to kick at him again when Zoro sheathed his swords quickly. Sanji was caught off guard and so he didn't even realized Zoro had grabbed his shirt until he felt a tug and he was on the floor, lying on his back, staring up at the bright lights of the bar as Zoro stood up the table over him.

"I'm a martial artist, remember?" Zoro said. "Kenjutsu isn't the only thing I do."

Sanji gritted his teeth and stood up.

He coughed.

It wasn't fair. Zoro knew Sanji's weaknesses. He knew he'd never use his hands in a fight, not for offensive attacks or defensive attacks, unless they were for leverage. Zoro knew he was safe from any punches coming his way and as much as Sanji wanted to throw him through a loop and leave him stunned with a broken nose curtesy of his fist, he didn't dare. To injure his hands was as bad as the death penalty for him.

 _Your hands._

Zoro liked his hands. Now he had even more of a reason to treasure them.

So what could he do? Zoro had blades, he had fierce determination and as much as Sanji respected and appreciated this trait of the swordsman, it didn't help him in the least. He could feel himself getting anxious. Zoro had full use of his body, he could use anything to attack but Sanji was limited. Fuck, and Zoro had the swords too.

Sanji coughed again, feeling his throat clam up. Fuck, he had to end this, somehow. He didn't want to hurt the swordsman. He knew Zoro didn't want to hurt him either, he avoided vital areas and some places that weren't vital, but would immobilize Sanji long enough for another attack. He had four options:

1: knock Zoro unconscious

2: let Zoro knock Sanji unconscious

3: concede

4: make Zoro surrender

None of these options seemed possible. Sanji knew of Zoro's competitive streak. There was no way he was just going to let Sanji throw him around and give up. No, giving up was impossible. Even with the craziness that was what felt like a battle to the death, Sanji wasn't going to give up and Zoro was too prideful to do that as well. He wasn't stupid, Zoro was a swordsman and honour was everything to him. At the same time, Sanji couldn't let himself fall unconscious either, so his only option was to knock Zoro out. It had never happened in all their time of training for either man. They always managed to get back up when the other thought that their opponent had finally fallen down.

 _Fuck, how do I do this?_

The memory of seeing Zoro sprawled on the floor with blood leaking out of him profusely, his usually tanned complexion pale, had made Sanji's blood run cold. It was too fresh for him to stand to see that. What if he could somehow mimic unconsciousness? Could he get Zoro unsteady enough that he couldn't move? Could he knock him out for say, a few seconds? Was that enough to guarantee it was over?

Sanji was tired. He didn't know how much longer he could fight and the tightening in his chest had increased. He was swallowing back coughs, which felt like swallowing bubbles of air and it was starting to hurt his throat.

Listening to his own breathing, he realized it sounded like he was wheezing. Was he really that tired from fighting Zoro?

They exchanged blows for what felt like forever, none of them showing signs of a visible hit. Sanji was tired but Zoro looked fine. Stamina. He totally should've complimented the man on it.

He had to end this. Now.

Taking a deep breath that felt like needles were prickling his throat as each lungful of air was inhaled, he aimed strike at Zoro. Zoro grabbed his foot to stop him and their eyes connected for a moment.

 _Sorry._

With as much force as Sanji's tired body could manage, he forced his foot back into the ground. Zoro was holding his foot with both hands, standing right under him. He tried to move away as gravity came and helped Sanji accomplish his job, but he just wasn't fast enough. Perhaps it was the look that distracted him, but that was all it took. As Sanji's foot came down harshly against the wooden floorboards, Zoro seemed to follow it. By the time Sanji's boot hit the floor, it had managed to hit the green-haired swordsman squarely in the head.

Zoro let out a groan, unmoving.

"I think he's out," Sanji said, trying his best to breathe normally. He tried to concentrate on his breathing rather that Zoro's limp body. He could feel a wheeze as it came out of his lips and began to cough again.

"Sanji, are you okay?" asked Nami, running to his side.

"Fine," he said, coughing into his fist. He held it in and counted to ten. "I just need water. Is it over?"

Nami nodded. "I think Zoro's been knocked out." She got him the water he requested and Ace came over to him.

The dark haired man lifted Sanji's arm that felt like lead into the air. "And the winner is Blackleg Sanji!"

It was at that moment that Zoro's eyes slowly cracked open and the look on his face was devastating.

* * *

Going home three million yen richer didn't make Sanji feel any better. He and Zoro had driven home in silence and though the tightness in his chest had eased up, Sanji didn't feel any better. In fact, he felt even more sick.

When they got into the apartment, he took off his shoes and watched as Zoro went into the fridge and gulped down half a carton of milk in one go.

"Are you okay?" asked Sanji.

"Hmm?" responded Zoro, his voice sounding distant.

"Are you upset?"

"No." The crushed carton said otherwise.

"Look, Zoro—"

"I don't need sympathy," Zoro said, cutting him off. "It's fine, really."

"You're lying."

"I'm allowed to lie, fuck off, Curly Brow!"

Sanji bit his lip. He wouldn't say he was sorry, because he wasn't and he didn't want to lie to Zoro. Instead, he turned his head away and reached for a cigarette. It didn't calm him down like it used to. Not at all. He didn't want to be rocky with the swordsman, didn't like the tension in the air around them as Zoro bit into an apple. Didn't like the way his stomach coiled nervously. Where had the ease gone? Was the honeymoon phase of the relationship already over?

Sanji hadn't expected their relationship to be perfect, he wasn't a moron, but at the same time, he had hoped …

 _Liar, you_ ** _are_** _a fucking moron. Life isn't a movie, this isn't going to go off like some chick-flick or something. Get it through your thick head, this is real life._

Sanji entered the kitchen. Even if he didn't have the overly-romantic riding off into the sunset ending of those movies (which he would call bullshit, while holding on tightly to whoever was closest to him's arm, trying to hide his tears as the Titanic sunk. He didn't scream when that idiot Rose let go of the love of her life. No, he was a stoic manly man.), that didn't mean he'd let this slide by. If they fell apart and Sanji did nothing to prevent, then he'd really feel bad.

"Want me to make you something?" he asked softly.

Zoro shook his head.

Zoro had never refused his foot before.

"Not hungry," the moss-head mumbled under his breath.

And then said Marimo's stomach growled.

Sanji said nothing. Instead, he just opened the pantry and started to cook him food. Zoro said nothing when he heard the oil hiss, hitting the pan.

It was the first time in a long time since Sanji had cooked in complete silence while the swordsman was present. Usually they'd be playing some kind of pointless game, whichever one popped into Sanji's head next, and then they'd sit down and eat. This time, Sanji made enough for one and set it on the table in front of Zoro.

He knew his show was on in a few minutes, but he didn't feel up for it. Instead, he was about to head to his room when he felt a hand on his wrist. Zoro's hand.

"Wait."

Sanji waited.

"I …" Zoro took a deep breath. "I want a rematch!"

Sanji nodded. The swordsman was blushing, from his too-loud declaration or the fact that he needed a rematch, Sanji didn't know. He didn't care. He just knew that going to bed without this resolved would surely haunt his dreams and he'd never get any sleep.

"Okay," he said softly.

Zoro had taken Sandai back from the wall and was ready to fight. He had determination in his eyes, the dedication that Sanji had complimented him on not so long ago.

"Okay," Sanji said. "Whoever lands three attacks first wins," Sanji explained. "Three solid attacks," he added.

Zoro nodded.

"Alright." Sanji gulped. "Start."

Zoro lunged forward and Sanji backed up, his back hitting the wall most instantly. He bit his bottom lip as Zoro aimed for his head and Sanji ducked down. The sword was instantly pulled back and Sanji's leg wrapped around Zoro's, pulling. Zoro hit the floor.

"One," Sanji said.

* * *

Zoro made a sound that reminded Sanji very much of a growl, picking himself back up off the floor.

They were both tired, to have a match so soon after they had just fought was utter stupidity. Still, Zoro probably wouldn't be able to sleep unless he tied with Sanji at the very least. Zoro struck at Sanji's back, but the cook flipped quickly over him, landing on the other side of him. Without his full supply of energy, Sanji was slower. He expected Zoro to use this to his advantage, but it seemed Zoro was also pretty slow.

Zoro made to attack, going to slice down on Sanji's arm. Sanji waited, determining Zoro's new timing given the new variables.

 _Now._

Sanji moved, but not before Zoro nicked him in the shoulder.

"One," Sanji said. "Tied for now."

Zoro shook his head. "No, that doesn't count. That wasn't a solid attack," he said. "It … it wasn't full power—"

"You ripped my fucking shirt again, that's a solid attack," Sanji argued. "Deal with it Marimo, we're tied for now."

Zoro grumbled under his breath.

Only someone who had as much honour and pride as Zoro would refuse to take a point freely given by Sanji. It wasn't a lie, his shoulder did hurt like a bitch, but Zoro was also right. It wasn't as powerful as it could've been. It wasn't "solid" in Zoro's opinion. They had to agree to disagree, as far as Sanji was concerned, they were tied. Zoro could either deny it, or accept it, but that didn't change his opinion.

Sanji tried to kick at Zoro's chest, but the swordsman blocked him. With his two swords preventing Sanji's foot from colliding with his face, Zoro angled his face to attack with Wado. The sword grazed Sanji in the shoulder. His already wounded shoulder. Sanji pushed himself back. "Two to one," he declared.

"That wasn't—"

"Two to one," Sanji repeated in a firm voice.

Zoro sighed. He prepared to attack again but Sanji beat him to it. He delivered a blow to Zoro's gut while his arms were raised to slash downwards and the swordsman's back slammed against the wall.

"Two to two," Sanji said. "Last point declares winner."

With that, he readied himself to defend. Zoro attacked at him forcefully, trying to push him against the wall like he had done before. The swords hit against each other, making a cringe-worthy noise as the steel screeched against steel. He had gotten used to it. He pushed back against him, but Zoro pushed harder until Sanji felt like his lungs were being crushed.

" _Remitto_!" Sanji gasped out, trying to get the air back into his lungs.

Zoro gave him a confused look.

"Yield, I yield."

Zoro didn't stop pressing. "Fucking bastard," he muttered. "What, you're saying you surrender?" he demanded. "You're just giving up?" he spat.

"Zoro," Sanji said in a raspy voice, "I … I can't … breathe."

Immediately, Zoro pulled away from him and ran his fingers through his hair as Sanji tried to collect his breath. "Fucking bastard," he repeated. "You're a right bastard, you know that, Curly Brow?"

"How can I forget, with you constantly reminding me?" Sanji asked, trying to hold back a cough. He shook his head. "Look you got your rematch, can we go to bed?"

"It wasn't a fair game!" Zoro yelled. "You fucking cheater, you totally threw the match!"

"Why would I throw a match? Why would I cheat so that you'd win?"

Zoro shook his head. "Don't you dare fucking pity me," he snapped. "I can handle a lost fairly won, what I can't is a victory handed over to me undeservingly."

Sanji was tired. He was pissed. He did not want to have this conversation. "Oh yeah?" he yelled. "I could see how well you were taking it!"

"That doesn't mean I want you to fucking give up in the middle of a fight!" Zoro snapped.

"If you don't want my fucking pity, don't make me pity you!"

 _BANG!_

Sanji was pressed back up against the wall. This time it was just Zoro's hands holding him there, gripping him tightly by the collar of his shirt. "Don't you dare pity me, you bastard. I have never pitied you, never, you understand me? And I will admit you were a very pitiful thing when I first met you. You were pathetic, now that I think about it. You were abused, you were a wreck, I can admit that but I never once felt an ounce of pity for you. Not because I didn't care, fuck no, I care, you have no idea how much I fucking care, but I never thought you were weak, never looked at you with those fucking sympathetic eyes. Don't you dare do this to me, if you do, I swear, I'm never forgiving you!"

His breathing was rough, so was Zoro's. As Zoro gripped him tighter, the longer he took his deep breaths, the more he froze. Suddenly, his grip loosened on Sanji entirely and the blond slid to the floor, coughing. There was pure terror in Zoro's eyes as he stared down at Sanji. "No …" he muttered under his breath. "Fuck no!"

 _BANG!_

Zoro's fist connected with the wall above Sanji and he flinched. He couldn't help it. Zoro looked down at him with self-loathing in his eyes. He dropped to his knees in front of him and went to reach for him, maybe to pull him into a hug, Sanji didn't know, because then Zoro's hands recoiled back.

It was at the moment, when Zoro turned his head away and stood up, shoving his hands tightly in his pockets, that Sanji realized what was going on in Zoro's head.

 _He's scared. He's scared that I'm scared. Of him._

Zoro couldn't be more wrong. "Zoro," Sanji called to him, scrambling to get to his feet. "Zoro!"

The swordsman didn't turn around. In fact, he just kept walking.

"Zoro, fucking listen to me when I talk!" Sanji demanded. He ran after the swordsman, hearing the bedroom door slam. He felt like one of those stupid men in the movies, that chasing scene that was always crucial to every romantic comedy or romantic movie in general, the trope. He leaned his forehead against the door. "Fucking listen to me Marimo," he said.

He bit his lip when silence was the only answer he got. After a moment, he took a deep breath and started to talk, feeling incredibly stupid as his voice traveled through the door.

"I don't hate you, if that's what you're thinking. You're an ahou, of course that's what you're thinking. You don't need to be gentle with me Zoro, I'm not made of glass. I'm not fragile. I can handle a bit of roughing up." He paused. "But … I can't say I'm not scared of you."

He could hear a sharp intake of breath on the other side of the door. Zoro was listening.

His chest squeezed tightly as he tried to speak, fighting even though his voice seemed caught in his throat. "I'm terrified." He fell down to his knees, leaning against the door. "But it's not what you think," he said softly. "Trust me on this Zoro, I'm not scared for the reasons you think. I don't mind when you get mad, or when you're a little too forceful. I don't care about that. I don't mind that you raise your voice either. You need anger management, remember?" He let out a dry laugh. "This is going to sound stupid, but … I heard someone tell me something once. When I went to go buy those stupid flowers, I met this man. He asked me if I wanted to buy roses." Sanji shook his head at the stupidity. "I told him he was fucking insane since roses represented love and I wasn't in love. I told him that roses were a stupid symbol for love. They have thorns, you know, Marimo? They're really prickly. Kind of like a thistle." He laughed again. "Anyway, he told me … he told me love was like that. Love was letting someone have the power to hurt you, but trusting them not to. And I'm not saying I'm in love with you, because I have no fucking idea, but …" Sanji took a deep breath. "I'm trusting you here, not to hurt me. Because you can be as rough as you want to be with me, I'll forgive you because I know that's who you are Zoro, it's part of you and I respect that, I like that. The reason I'm terrified … the reason I'm afraid of you …" He bit his lip, unsure whether or not he was able to finish his sentence. He felt like he was choking up, like his brain was telling him to do the sensible thing and to stop himself from speaking before he said something he'd regret. Instead, he pushed forward, ignoring that stupid voice of common sense. "Because you can hurt me. If you ever … if you ever left, if you ever decided you didn't need me anymore … I …" Sanji bit the inside of his cheek. _Focus on that pain, ignore the blurriness. Ignore it._ "I …"

Sanji wiped his face, despite the fact that no tears had fallen. "You get the point," he said. He remembered at one point Zeff told him that if the word he wanted to say didn't work at the moment, don't force them. That would make him even more anxious. Find a different route, say something else. You'll always have time to come back to it when you're ready, when you really can say it. He rose to his feet again and tapped his knuckles against the door. "Hey Marimo? Wanna have a rematch? Fair and square, winner takes all."

There was harsh breathing on the other side of the door.

Sanji sighed and began to walk away when he heard the door open.

"A-are you sure?"

He turned around to see Zoro leaning against the doorframe, staring at the ground. "I don't … I don't want to hurt you," he said softly. "Jesus Sanji, it's the last thing I want to do, but … I know my temper's …"

"It's fine," Sanji said. "I'm a big boy, I can handle it. And if I ever couldn't, I'd tell you."

"Promise?" He sounded so small.

A small smile spread itself across Sanji's lips. "Promise."

Zoro nodded, still a little shaken. "So … the rematch. You sure you're up for it?" he asked. "You must be tired, you sure you can fight?"

"No, not that kind of rematch," Sanji said.

Zoro blinked.

"Marimo, have you ever played Are You Nervous Yet?"

Zoro gave him a blank look.

Sanji grinned evilly.

* * *

"It's simple," Sanji said. "All you need to do is get the other person to admit they're nervous first," Sanji explained. "Each person takes turns touching the other person. You start at the head and move downwards. Each time you go down, you ask if they're nervous. The first one to say yes loses."

"And you're not going to cheat?" Zoro asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

"Tell me Zoro, how can I cheat in a game like this?"

Zoro nodded slowly, but frowned. "Are you sure you want to?" he asked. "Are you … are you comfortable with …?" Zoro trailed off.

"Zoro, I gave you a blowjob, I think now's a bit too late to act all self-conscious," Sanji said bluntly.

Zoro blinked but slowly, a grin started to spread across his face.

Sanji was lying though. He was nervous, beyond nervous. But he'd hold himself in as long as it took. He wouldn't squirm, he wouldn't lie to get out of it if he felt slightly uncomfortable. Being uncomfortable and nervous were different to him, at least around Zoro and if he won this game, so be it, Zoro would accept it. He wasn't going to throw another game, not after what he had just gone through with the swordsman. "Do you want to start?" he asked Zoro.

Zoro nodded. "Okay." He lifted his hand, beginning to run his fingers through Sanji's hair. "Like this?" he asked softly.

"Yeah," Sanji replied, feeling his whole body respond to Zoro's touch.

"Are you nervous yet?" Zoro asked, his cool breath brushing the shell of Sanji's ear. He shivered involuntarily.

"No," he said, trying to sound firm.

Zoro let out a laugh. "This could be fun."

Sanji ran his own fingers through Zoro's hair, feeling the soft texture underneath his fingers, tugging gently. "Are you nervous yet?"

"Nope." Damn that cocky bastard with that confident smirk. Zoro's hand moved from Sanji's hair to his cheek, catching Sanji off guard. He'd expect Zoro to go for his neck, but instead he caressed Sanji's cheek gently. He could feel the man's calluses as they brushed against his soft skin and Sanji knew he was blushing. "Nervous yet?" he asked.

"No," Sanji replied. He lowered his hand from Zoro's hair to Zoro's left ear, pulling lightly at his earrings. Zoro seemed to freeze at this, slightly shocked. "You? Are you nervous yet?"

Zoro shook his head, but Sanji could see his Adam's apple bob.

Zoro's hand moved from Sanji's cheek to the back of his neck, slowly pulling him closer. They were forehead to forehead, so close Sanji could taste Zoro on his lips. "Nervous?" Zoro asked in a seductive tone.

"N-no," Sanji stuttered. Zoro smirked. Sanji glared at him.

Sanji's hand moved down from Zoro's ear all the way to his chest. He could faintly remember running his fingers across Zoro's bare chest when he had been drunk, but feeling his muscles through his shirt sent a shot of thrill and wonder through him. As he felt each of the dips and valleys of Zoro's chest, he almost forgot about the game completely until Zoro cleared his throat. "Nervous yet?" Sanji asked.

"No," replied Zoro. "See something you like?" he teased.

"Maybe," Sanji replied in a small voice.

They were still leaning on each other's foreheads, Sanji's hand pausing its exploration of Zoro's chest. Sanji didn't dare move as Zoro moved from his neck down to his chest. He felt himself tense up almost immediately, feeling Zoro's hands as they went down his shoulder-blade, sure to go down to his torso once he was finished, but instead, Zoro let his hand slowly skim down Sanji's arm, leaving goosebumps. "Nervous?" he asked and with each letter, Sanji swore the distance between them was closing.

"M-maybe," Sanji admitted.

"That wasn't a yes," Zoro pointed out. "Your turn."

Sanji moved from Zoro's chest down to his thigh, slowly running his fingers across it before squeezing lightly. Sanji looked him straight in the eye, but Zoro closed his, breathed through his nose and seemed to be counting. "Nervous?" Sanji asked, feeling the thick tension around them.

"You wish," Zoro replied, his eyes opening. "Daring, aren't you?" he asked. He let his hand move from Sanji's arm to one of his hands, lacing them together. "Nervous yet?"

Sanji couldn't hold in his blush. "Yes," he admitted.

"Too bad," Zoro told him softly, closing the space between them.

Sanji practically sunk into him, the hand on Zoro's thigh about to lift to wrap around his neck, but the swordsman used his other hand to keep it from moving. Instead, he let go of Sanji's hand that he was holding, held onto the hand that was on his thigh and used his free arm to guide Sanji closer to him.

"Zoro," Sanji gasped, pulling him closer by tugging at his hair gently. Zoro let himself be guided to him and took Sanji's bottom lip in between his own before letting it go. It felt so sensual, so … _intimate_.

It was soft and it was slow, innocent almost. One of Sanji's legs lifted from its position and slowly tried to wrap itself around Zoro's waist. The two of them were sitting, so it may not have been the most comfortable position Sanji had ever been in, but he couldn't help it. He pulled Zoro closer and Zoro didn't seem to be complaining when Sanji felt his stomach knot and his breath seemed to be cut short. He couldn't breathe and slowly let Zoro go, pulling away. Still pressed forehead to forehead, he tried to catch his breath.

"I win," Zoro said with a smirk.

Sanji nodded, giving him a small smile but something told him that this feeling in his chest, his shortness of breath, wasn't entirely because of Zoro's kiss.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank yous!_

 _takafumi : Okay I kinda went crazy like two days ago and just reread all of Kisa and Yukina's stories and re-watched those episodes and I was so glad that episode 4 of **Junjou Romantica** season 3 was Shinobu and Miyagi! And how his friends asked him about his "girlfriend" and he's like, "she's older. By seventeen years" and they were all like, "YOU'RE DATING A COUGAR?!" God I laughed so hard, especially when he attacked the pumpkin ... I really like Kisa and Yukina's relationship because I like a splash of angst and Kisa provides it, he really does. I love how his name is "Kisa Shouta". Shouta. And also, if you remember chapter 6, Sanji says he knows nothing about Zoro, so Zoro gives him this long list of things about him, which was inspired by Yukina's confession to Kisa. Yup, I have no life and really love **Sekai Ichi Hatsukoi,** I think I like it more than **Junjou Romantica** just because I feel the development with relationships is different and Takano doesn't molest Ritsu as much as Usagi does to Misaki. Quite frankly, I've found that all the ukes of **Junjou Romantica** are tsunderes. God I love them!_

 _Guest : I might've been lying. The time in the story might have not been August ... Um, well it's January now for them ... I don't know why, but I can get into wintery holidays easier than I can autumn ones when it's not autumn. I'm gonna guess and say you're JustCallMeLucie?_

 _Okay I will now proceed to tell you all the references I made and in their order from the last chapter._

 _ **Junjou Romantica** (Nowaki! Yes, I put him in there again because I love him very, very much. He just looks so huggable!)_  
 _The steak maker thing that Zoro said he got Luffy, I saw an ad for it and it just talked about how you just put in a stake in this box thing and then set it for a certain way you wanted it and it made it perfectly. I figured Luffy would love it. I suppose that's a reference?_  
 _ **InuYasha** , because you know, where else do you find a monk who loves groping people with a wind tunnel?_  
 _ **Ranma 1/2** , because you know, drowning pandas and shit like that ..._  
 _ **Fullmetal Alchemist/Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood,** because I could, I can, and I WILL! YAY ED! (remember kids, drink your milk.)_  
 _ **Rurouni Kenshin,** Sanosuke is a street fighter who stopped being a street fighter. The author mentioned that people sent him fan letters accidentally writing his name "Sasuke", so uh, yeah, that's why he's there..._  
 _ **Bleach** because that's where Ichigo's from, in case you didn't know cause not all main characters can have their names in the title._  
 _ **Naruto** , because he's Naruto, come on!_  
 _ **One Piece.** Yes, I referenced **One Piece** in a **One Piece** story. RANDOM FACT: DID YOU KNOW SANJI'S NAME WAS GOING TO BE NARUTO? And then they realized that Naruto fit the name of a hyper-active ninja with ADHD and swirly tattoos on their stomach and not awesome smoking (literally and metaphorically) cooks with badass personally stylized savate. They didn't want the two to get confused._  
 _ **Pokémon** , because even if we don't watch it now, we did at some point._  
 _ **Bridget Jones' Diary b** ecause it's quirky like that._  
 _I sort of referenced people who are singing Christmas jingles when it's like June, but then they're like, "Jesus was actually born in June!" and I'm like, "Um, I'm basically atheist, so uh, no thanks."_  
 _ **The Grinch Who Stole Christmas** because you can't write about Christmas without mentioning him!_  
 _ **A Christmas Carol.** "Bah humbug!"_  
 _ **BuzzFeed** , thank you for explaining how a relationship works!_  
 _ **The Hobbit.** I don't remember when, but Zoro mentions the way Sanji's smoking and I totally thought, "that's a Hobbit reference to the smoke rings!" Sorry if that wasn't clear._

 _Told ya, lots of references. Now for my question, I've actually got a few._

 _One: SANJI SPOKE IN LATIN! For like, 1 word, but still. **Try to tell me what it means without using Google Translate!**_

 _Two: I like music. **If you were to give Sanji and Zoro a theme song to describe their relationship in this story, what would it be?** Give me the title and the artist, I always like learning about new songs!_

 _Three: OKAY PERTINENT THINGS TO THIS CHAPTER! **What'd you think of Sanji and Zoro's speeches? Did Sanji say the right thing to Zoro? Are Zoro's fears about scaring Sanji completely unfounded? How do you think their relationship is, at this point?**_


	29. Be My Valentine?

_**Author's Note:** I said it was long, didn't I? There was a lot of stuff that went into this, like a lot. There's tons of references, including another two characters who I don't own, but I'm going to see if you guys can tell me who they are. I don't share Zoro's opinions on things, it was just fun to look at how someone who doesn't know about manga and anime would react to it. I bended a few rules of layout too, sorry about that. I did another weirdly formatted story as well. All the warnings exist because I had fun with them. Thanks for the reviews will be found below as well as some songs from the playlist of my own. Let's see if you can name all the references as well. I don't own **One Piece** or basically anything in here._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :  
**

 **Mentions of past self-abuse**

 **Fluff over-load**

 **Pedophiles everywhere as well as gay men**

 **Zoro ranting**

 **Getting friendly in a car**

* * *

Chapter 29: Be My Valentine?

* * *

February 14th. Valentine's Day. Guillotine Day. The day St. Valentine was killed for being a martyr. The day girls bought a thousand chocolates, handing them out to their thousands of crushes, bumbling through confessions. The day guys got cavities from being unable to refuse the sweets brought to them. The day that was the utter bane of Zoro Roronoa's existence.

The stupid red hearts had been everywhere recently, no matter where he turned. Honestly, it was one of the biggest pains he had ever experienced. Each year he wished somehow that the second week of February would just vanish into smoke magically because quite frankly, he couldn't stand it. Not at all. The sappiness, the stuffed bears holding hearts that read " _je t' hear_ t". It wasn't even grammatically correct, the phrase was " _je t'aime_ ", not " _je t'heart_ ". True, it was a picture of a heart and not the word, otherwise he'd _really_ call them idiots, but still, it was wrong. The Valentine's Day specials on TV made his stomach churn, the stupid incorrect photograph people called a heart— it wasn't pretty, it was a fucking organ that kept you alive, it wasn't supposed to be pretty! It was supposed to pump blood throughout your entire body, it wasn't supposed to be slapped onto sales signs.

"Hey Sanji?"

The blond cook turned at the sound of his name. He put a splash of soya sauce into the frying pan before responding. "Yeah?"

"Valentine's Day …" Zoro trailed off. He cleared his throat, feeling awkward. "What do you think of it?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip and looked away from him. "What do _you_ think of it?"

"I …" Zoro considered what he was going to say. He didn't like Valentine's Day, that was no secret from his friends. Maybe Sanji didn't know yet. Should he lie? Tell him he liked it? Zoro frowned to himself. If there was no honesty in a relationship, how was it supposed to work? "Hate it," he said finally.

"You do?" asked Sanji, his voice sounding quieter than before.

"Yeah," Zoro said, feeling more at ease with talking to Sanji about it. "Can't stand it. I remember at school, these girls would just walk up to me and shove chocolate in my face and they'd just rush out this weird jumble of words that I think were confessions. They always got so upset when I wouldn't take the chocolate. It's not my fault that I don't like sweets." He shrugged. "I think if they really liked me, they'd have known that."

"But, isn't half of liking someone the process of getting to know them?" asked Sanji. "I mean I had to spend about a month to know you don't like chocolate. If you never gave them the chance to learn … isn't that kind of making them give up before they had a chance to start?"

Zoro gave him a strange look. "Why are you getting all emotional on me, cook?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"No reason," Sanji said, turning his attention towards the stove.

"You never told me what you thought of Valentine's Day," Zoro reminded him.

"It's not important," said Sanji in a soft voice. "It's no big deal."

"Come on, what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't hear my boyfriend's opinion?" Boyfriend. Zoro tried not to grin too much. He still loved the sound of that and liked it even more when he said it. "Sanji, I'll tickle you if you don't tell me," Zoro warned, getting out of his chair.

"That's your weakness, ahou," Sanji muttered.

"You know, you're very rude," Zoro muttered in his ear, wrapping his arms around Sanji. Sanji immediately tensed, but just when Zoro was about to let go, Sanji let out his breath again and relaxed a little into his hold. "Calling me ahou and all."

"Would you prefer baka?"

"They mean the same thing," Zoro reminded him.

"Baka's politer," Sanji said. "Zoro …" His voice became soft and quiet. Zoro leaned closer to hear him better. He felt tingles going through his body, waiting anxiously for Sanji's words. He was ready to bet it was something really seductive, the words he was about to tell him. "Get the fuck off of me, I'm cooking." And yet he said the words so softly, Zoro had to count to ten to calm his body down.

"This is what I meant, you have a filthy mouth," Zoro said. "So seriously, what do you think of Valentine's Day?"

Sanji sighed. "I don't … mind it, exactly," he said softly. "I mean I don't hate it like you do, it's just a holiday that's there, right? And yeah, the fact that women are treated with respect on this day is great, but it's kinda stupid that they aren't treated that way all around the year …"

"See, that's my point!" Zoro said with a big grin. "To act differently just cause the date says you need to be more lovey-dovey shouldn't affect how your relationship is, right? You could do that pointless romantic shit any time in the year, to have a whole holiday dedicated to some day a guy died is hardly necessary," Zoro pointed out, glad to see they saw things the same way.

"Well … I wouldn't put it like that really," Sanji said slowly. "I've celebrated Valentine's Day a lot, the Baratie makes special menus for different holidays. I've grown used to it," he said with a shrug. "Besides, I've never had— never mind." Sanji turned away from Zoro and went back to his stir-fry. "So we won't celebrate it, okay. I can do that. Besides, you wouldn't want chocolate anyway, would you?"

Zoro grinned. "Great."

He didn't see the strained look in Sanji's eyes when he smiled.

* * *

 _SMACK!_

"YOU DID WHAT?!"

Zoro wasn't sure if he wanted to clean out his ear, or cover his stinging cheek. He opted for his ear, seeing as he didn't want to lose his hearing at such a young age. All of Nami's loud screaming was starting to piss him off. He sighed. "I told you, we aren't celebrating Valentine's Day," he said with a shrug. "I'm not that into it and neither is Sanji."

"Are you a moron?" She shook her head. "Never mind, of course you are. Really, I thought you and Sanji were getting better at understanding each other but you just keep taking two steps back and one step forward!" With a sigh, Nami sent a harsh glare in Zoro's direction. "Zoro, talk to me. Tell me, what kind of person do you think Sanji is?"

 _Sexy. Strong. Flexible._ ** _Very_** _flexible._

"Zoro?"

"Hmm?"

"You were thinking dirty thoughts, weren't you?" Nami accused.

"No I wasn't," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "Anyway um … you were saying something?"

"Zoro, don't tell me you don't understand the way your own boyfriend's mind works." She shook her head. "He's a total romantic, you realize that, right?"

Zoro looked at her strangely. "But—"

"There's no but about it, Sanji is a complete romantic. Do you know what Valentine's Day means to romantics?" Nami pressed.

Zoro sighed. "Don't tell me I screwed up again. Why can't he screw up our relationship for once?"

"It's just because you're a blunder headed idiot. Honestly, can't you tell when he's lying?" Nami demanded, putting her hands on her hips in an overly-feminine way.

Zoro sighed. "Just cause I'm not a mind-reader—"

"You don't need to read minds," Nami snapped. "You just need to look him in the eyes. They say the eyes are the window to the soul you know."

"Who believes any of those sayings crap?" Zoro sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I can fix this," he muttered to himself. "I can totally fix this …"

There was only one question looming in his mind.

Sure, he could fix it, but _how_?

"You have no idea how to fix this, do you?" she asked.

"I do," Zoro protested.

"Oh yeah? How?"

"I just need to …" Zoro made several hand gestures that had no real connection to anything, nor did they hold any meaning to anyone, himself included. Eventually he just threw his hands up in the air pointlessly when Nami raised an inquisitive eyebrow at him. "I don't know, do some romantic shit or something!"

She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "You're hopeless," she muttered under her breath. "Do you know how to read body language Zoro?"

"Body language?"

"Yes, reading the body and understanding things that aren't spoken, only displayed through movement of the body. I'm not a dictionary, I can't define everything for you."

"Yeah I know body language," Zoro said. "You think I could be a swordsman without it? Just cause I didn't know your fancy terminology doesn't mean I don't know what it is," he snapped.

"No, Zoro, what you know is direct body language. You know how to read people's bodies to determine their next move. Physically. What I'm talking about is something much more subtle." She laughed to herself. "That's why you don't get it. Look, either way, you need to know it. You and I both speak using body language, regardless of whether or not we realize we're doing it."

"Dammit, is this another one of those psychological things about your subconsciousness?" Zoro asked with a sigh. He rubbed his face for a moment, taking a deep breath. "Okay, fine, load your bullshit on me."

"Psychology is an actual course you can take, some people major in it," Nami said. "And it's very complicated, understanding the human mind is not easy."

"Isn't it based on chemistry?"

"It's based on chemical releases of the brain and various other variables," Nami said.

"Did you major in psychology?"

"No, I majored in meteorology."

"Okay, so now that we've got that all sorted out, don't talk to me about the human psyche, Miss Weather Girl."

Nami glared at him and all cockiness he had felt before left him. "Zoro, we're doing this whether you want to or not. Trust me, it'll help you with your relationship and not just your one with Sanji. I'm talking everyone here, including me."

"I'm getting a murderous intent vibe coming from you," Zoro said, backing his chair away from the table slightly.

"Body language," Nami said. "How can you tell I want to kill you?"

"I've got a better question," Zoro said. "How come you're not denying your urge to slaughter?"

"Slaughter is such an ugly word," Nami said. She batted her eyelashes in a rather innocent way, but Zoro wasn't fooled. "I much more prefer … domesticate."

"You _domesticate_ people?" Zoro repeated. "How many skeletons are in your closet?"

"In five seconds there'll be one more in there than there was before," Nami said, glaring at him. "Don't test me. Now, how can you tell I want to kill you?"

Zoro sighed. He thought it was stupid, beyond stupid actually, but he sighed and decided to play along anyway. "Um, because your eyes are staring at me really creepily, kind of like you're imagining stabbing me with a knife—"

"Pitchfork, but close enough."

Zoro frowned. "Does Luffy know he's involved with a murderer?"

"Zoro, focus!"

"Got it." Zoro sighed and examined Nami. Her arms were crossed over her chest, her glare was unsettling. Her mouth was set in a firm line that was probably holding back curse words and wishing he had never been born. "You're just … very hostile right now."

"That's clear. Okay, think about Sanji this morning. How was he acting?"

Zoro tried to remember. Sanji usually cooked with his back to Zoro, which meant that he was rarely ever facing him. This also meant that this morning when he had pressed himself against Sanji and held him, he probably should've actually paid attention to the cook as a whole rather than being caught up in the aroma of the promising meal he was cooking and the sound of his voice.

"Um …" He shook his head. "I don't know, I mean he's usually not facing me."

"How did he sound?" Nami pressed.

"He …" Zoro could remember this quite well, but he didn't want to say something that would end with Nami trying to kill him. "I asked him about Valentine's Day. Since we're in a relationship, I figured I could tell him I wasn't that big of a fan of it." He paused, but Nami was still looking at him expectantly. "He sounded a bit quieter, now that I think about it. Almost … timid." He shook his head. "But Sanji isn't shy. Most of the time. And what reason would he have to be shy around me?"

"Maybe because you voiced your hatred for Valentine's Day?"

"Besides that." Zoro thought back to the conversation. "I told him about those girls in high school confessing to me—"

"Zoro, have you no shame?!"

Zoro blinked. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Did you do something wrong?" Nami repeated. "Of course you did, you inconsiderate imbecile!" She shook her head. "It's like an unwritten rule between two people in a relationship, you don't ever mention old flames."

"But I never dated any of them—"

"Never. _Ever_ ," Nami repeated. "What would you think if Sanji spoke to you about other people he had dated?"

Zoro bit his lip. "But he's never been in a relationship before."

Nami huffed. "Not all people are as fortunate as you, you know!" Nami sighed. "Anyway, what did he say?"

"He said that rejecting a girl because she didn't know I didn't have a sweet tooth was like forcing someone to give up before they even started. Then when I pointed out that he hadn't told me his opinion on Valentine's Day, he told me it was nothing important."

"What, did you just leave it at that?" Nami asked.

"No," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "I'm not that shit with people. I wanted to know his opinion, so I asked him again. Pressed him a bit. He told me that the way women were treated on Valentine's Day should be that way all the time, all year-round and having a date specifically for it was stupid. Then he talked about how he had celebrated Valentine's Day a lot at the Baratie and something about special menus, I don't know. And then he said he didn't mind if we didn't celebrate it."

"Is that all?"

"Yeah," Zoro said with a shrug. "Why?"

"You're an idiot."

"You know, if you keep telling me that every day, it starts to mean less and less to me." He shook his head. "Anyway, what's the big deal? He said it himself that he didn't mind."

"That means he minds!"

"I thought only girls were supposed to be this cryptic." Zoro sighed. "Do I seriously need some kind of dictionary to understand my boyfriend?" He ran his fingers through his hair. "I've got about a week till Valentine's Day, I can figure something out."

* * *

February 7th, 7 Days till Valentine's

* * *

Zoro could figure something out. What did people like on Valentine's Day? Well, there was the obvious confessions and what not. He knew there were also the hearts and the ribbon and the huggable bears and keychains with their names on it. He looked it up on the Internet too and they had recommended buying edible underwear, but considering this was _Sanji_ and Zoro wasn't even sure how much of his guts it took Sanji to give him his "gift", he decided that was stupid. Plus, it wasn't like he or Sanji were up for wearing panties. They weren't _that_ gay.

The obvious choice was to get chocolate. He heard somewhere that Belgium chocolate, or Switzerland chocolate was the best. Or at least, finer made. Which was why he was standing outside a candy store with yen in his wallet and determination.

He walked into the store and the bells above the door rang out. Almost immediately, he felt nauseous from all the sweetness. It made him cringe as he walked to a display of chocolate. There was too much, too much sugar, too many possible cavities, too many fucking hearts everywhere.

"What are you looking for?"

Zoro swore that the tall giant of a man was following him. Though he hadn't seen him since he had been kicked out of that fancy kitchen store, he could recognize him and his innocent gaze anywhere. "Are you fucking kidding me?" he demanded.

The man gave him a smile.

"How many fucking jobs do you have?"

The man took a moment to pause. "Six, last time I checked."

 _Last time I checked? Why the fuck are you smiling so much if you're working yourself so hard? Where the fuck are your parents? And if you really are that man that Sanji met while going flower picking, why is a kid your age with so many jobs involved with an older lover? A_ ** _male_** _lover on top of it all?_

Zoro shook his head. "Never mind, I don't need help."

"Do you know anything about chocolate?" asked the man.

"Do _you_ know anything about chocolate?" Zoro shot back.

"I got Employee of the Month a while ago," said the man. He wasn't fucking bragging and perhaps that's what irritated Zoro further. "So I think I do."

Zoro wanted to strangle him, he really did, but the problem was he just looked so innocent and kind that he was that one person in the world who, after you strangled him and his body fell limp in your arms, you felt incredibly bad about it, even if you were a heartless serial killer with no human emotions.

"Fine," Zoro said, crossing his arms over his green windbreaker. "What do you recommend?"

"Is this for the same person who you wanted to get the knives for?" asked the man.

Zoro looked at him. "Did you know you share a lot? I know how tall you are, how many jobs you have, that you're gay, you've got an older partner, and that you work at a flower shop, a kitchen store and apparently, a candy store. But do you know what I don't know?"

"What?" He was genuinely curious. Damn him for being so straightforward and naive.

"Your name."

The man nodded, as though it occurred to him that this was quite true. "You share a lot too, you know," he said. "I know you're in a relationship with the blond man, that you have a short temper, have a bad sense of direction, remind people of thistles, and your lover is a cook."

"W-we're not l-lovers," Zoro said, fearing his stutter would do something to his credibility.

"And the two of you react the same to that statement," the man said with a grin. "I believe the blond's name is Sanji, correct? And yours is Zoro?"

Zoro gritted his teeth. "Now you're really pissing me off, Giant."

The man frowned. "That wasn't my intention," he said. "I'm Nowaki."

 _Who the fuck names their kid "typhoon"?_

Zoro shook his head. "Look, are you going to help me or not?"

"What kind of chocolate do you like?" asked Nowaki. It felt good to put a name to the face. That way he could say that the employee with numerous jobs who was stalking him had a name he could give the police when he reported him for stalking and filed a restraining order. So what if he didn't have a last name? There couldn't be that many typhoons out there.

"I don't like chocolate," Zoro said, staring at the various chocolate brands with a frown on his face. "Hence my dilemma."

Nowaki nodded. "What kind of chocolate does your lover like?"

"Can you stop calling him that?" Zoro asked.

"You're turning a tad pink," said Nowaki with a big grin on his face.

"Am not," Zoro muttered, crossing his arms much like a child. "And I don't know," Zoro admitted. "Since … since I don't like sweet things, there isn't any chocolate in the shit apartment."

Nowaki nodded understandingly. "How about you sample some? Then you can buy whichever one you like best."

"Didn't I just tell you? I don't like chocolate, why the fuck would I have any?" he snapped.

Nowaki nodded once more. He was starting to remind Zoro of a bobble-head. "Belvus is a Belgium chocolate brand, a very good one too. It is a bit expensive though …"

"Aren't you supposed to make me want to buy it anyway, regardless of price?" Zoro asked him curiously.

"Why would I lie to a customer?"

Zoro sighed. "Never mind, I'll take it."

It was once it was ringed up at the register that Zoro realized what Nowaki meant by "a bit expensive".

 _Holy fuck, that's a lot of zeroes!_

He bought it anyway.

His logic was as follows:

 _I'm already in front of the cashier, I've already waited in line. Plus that really annoying yet really innocent typhoon just spent the past five minutes talking to me._

The second he was out of the store, he realized how stupid it was. He didn't return the chocolate though, nor did he throw it out.

Instead, he just kept it, wondering why the fuck he had bought something that he didn't even like and wasn't a hundred percent sure Sanji would like either.

* * *

February 8th, 6 Days till Valentine's

* * *

Okay, so chocolate wouldn't work. He wasn't a complete idiot though, he knew he couldn't just do nothing. Because Sanji wasn't expecting anything, that meant that Zoro had a chance to really surprise him. He had gone through hell trying to figure out what to get the blond for Christmas, why the hell did he have to think so hard about thinking of something for Valentine's Day too? Why were they so fucking close to each other on the calendar? Better yet, why couldn't Sanji just be one of those pessimists who saw Valentine's Day as Singles Awareness Day?

He could buy the cook some anime DVDs. Yeah, that could work. But he'd look like an idiot walking into that store. He thought about it. Maybe? Maybe not? Did he dare to?

 _Fuck it, I've got almost no other ideas._

If he couldn't find something, it was easy, he just needed to go in and go out. No reason to be stuck in a conversation. Surely the tall giant of a man couldn't work at yet another one of the stores he went to, right?

He walked in and checked around, half-expecting to see him there. He didn't see him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he kinda missed him. Just a little.

The store had shelves of manga and racks of anime. God, which one was Sanji's favourite? He was pretty diverse in what he liked, so surely it couldn't matter all that much what Zoro chose, right? Unless it was an anime Sanji had already seen, which meant he'd just be re-watching it for Zoro's sake. Besides, wasn't anime a pretty piss-poor present for Valentine's Day?

 _Not if you're an otaku like Sanji._

 _He'd probably object to being called an otaku._

 _Don't all otakus?_

He read some of the titles.

 ** _Gravitation_**. Okay, the art was overly-cutesy in his opinion. _A music anime?_ he thought until he read the description. This was … this was … _Is this gay hentai?!_ Immediately, he slammed the DVD case back onto the shelf. He was pretty sure he was scarred for life now.

Hmm, there was ** _Special A_** _?_ Zoro frowned, reading the plot. _So is this … what they call shōjo?_ Um, too girly for him.

 ** _Sensitive Pornography_** _— holy fuck, they have the word pornography in the title? Fuck no!_

 ** _Kaichou-wa Maid-Sama_** _? Oh, it's just more shôjo._

 ** _Black Butler._** _There's a demon in here?! Cool! Wait, uh, why does it look like he's trying to fuck that little boy? Oh God, is this that shotacon thing? Fuck, is he a gay pedophile who rapes young boys? He really_ ** _is_** _a demon!_

 ** _Love Stage!_** _Why the fuck are there two exclamation marks? I already get it, you're excited._ Zoro tilted his head as he stared at the cover. _Is that … a boy or a girl?_ He squinted, not entirely sure of the blond's gender. _Why does that dark haired guy remind me a bit of a rapist? Next._

 _"_ ** _Ouran High School Host_** _—"_ Zoro shook his head. Nope, not getting involved with host clubs. In fact, the cover just seemed to scream gay and he didn't like the way the twins seemed to be holding each other. "Does anime encourage incest?" he wondered aloud.

Suddenly, he felt someone tap him on the shoulder. Instantly, he spun around and immediately, his mouth dropped open.

There was a god standing before him. He was certain of it. He was tall, at least as tall as that typhoon guy, and had hair and eyes that just seemed to sparkle with flowers and all that stupid shit that Zoro was pretty sure came to make up the male protagonist of shōjo. His breath caught in his throat and even if he hadn't been gay or interested in guys in the slightest, he probably would've fallen head first for this guy. Of course, Zoro could never let his gruff exterior fade so almost immediately, he snapped at him. "Who the fuck are you?"

"I'm an employee here," the man said.

Zoro swore employees hated him, didn't they? "Do you want some help? I can recommend some anime, I read a lot of manga."

"You and Sanji," Zoro muttered under his breath.

"Sorry?"

It was strange to hear someone say "sorry" instead of "pardon". By the man's dazzling light hair and eyes, Zoro was willing to forgive him for his lack of using the proper word.

"Never mind," Zoro muttered to himself. "You said you could help me?"

"Have you ever tried _Girl's Master_?"

Zoro gave him a strange look.

"See, the story's pretty standard and all, but the latest volume just came out and—"

"Um, my friend likes things like _Fullmetal Bi_ — _Alchemist_ ," Zoro corrected himself. Were all men's lashes that long?

The man nodded. "I see, I think you have a slight problem then. This is the shōjo section, the shōunen section is over there," he gestured towards a giant display of books and anime stacked high on shelves.

"Um, excuse me, but how many floors does this store have?"

"Eight," the man replied.

"I see …"

 _RING! RING! RING!_

Zoro took his phone out and checked caller ID. "Sanji?" he asked. It was good to know the cook actually bothered with his phone.

"Where the fuck are you?"

"I'm …" Zoro paused. He looked at the god of a man. "Um, excuse me but … this is kind of strange but … where am I?"

"Marimo Books," the sparkly shōjo manga department employee replied with a smile. That smile had to be illegal.

"Marimo Books— hey, wait," Zoro paused but it was too late, Sanji was already laughing.

"Seriously? What are you doing over there? You don't even like manga!" Sanji said with a laugh.

Zoro glanced at the employee, trying his hardest not to blush. "You're talking really loudly," he said, "And the employees are starting to stare at me."

"Look, why aren't you home?" asked Sanji.

"I'm busy right now—"

"In a book store."

"They sell anime," Zoro defended himself.

"You want more _Pokémon_?"

"Shut up!" The tips of Zoro's ears were turning pink. It was beyond embarrassing.

"Whatever, just get back here when you can, Luffy wants us to go over to their house for dinner."

Zoro sighed. "Yeah yeah, whatever Curly Brow."

There was a soft laugh. "Bye Marimo."

"Bye."

He closed his phone and stared at the man who was looking at him curiously. "What?" he asked.

"Nothing," he replied. "I just didn't know there were so many gay men in Tokyo …"

"WHAT?!"

Zoro was fuming red, his fists curling at his side. He was in a fucking book store with several shelves of anime, speaking to an employee in charge of the shōjo section, who was now accusing him of being gay. Well, he _was_ gay. Sort of. But that didn't mean he was okay with him just saying it so casually!

"Well, I suppose I just never noticed before," the man seemed to be speaking to himself. "Once I've met one though, it seems they're everywhere …"

Zoro gaped. "Are you mocking me?"

"Oh no!" the man said with a bright smile. "It's nothing like that at all. In fact, my lover's a man."

 _You're seeing gay people everywhere? No,_ ** _I'm_** _seeing gay people everywhere! And what the fuck is it with everyone calling other "lovers"?_

The man looked over Zoro's shoulder and his smile brightened about a thousand times over. He started waving like a maniac. Zoro turned to see who he was gesturing to, only to see a small man who looked to be eighteen at oldest.

 _Fuck, are pedophiles everywhere too? Is there a name for that? They call women cougars, what about men? Do we just call them creepers or rapists?_

Zoro shoved his hands in his pockets, giving up on the idea.

Fuck that, Sanji could get his own anime if he loved it so desperately. Zoro couldn't stand to be in that store for a minute longer.

It wasn't until he had left and stared up at the giant neon green sign that he wondered how come he hadn't thought twice about entering a book store with the name "Marimo".

* * *

February 9th, 5 Days till Valentine's

* * *

It was okay. It was fine. Zoro could just buy Sanji a card. Yeah, he could do that. There was nothing wrong with doing it.

So why did all the cards seem stupid to him?

 _Happy Valentine's Day, thinking of you!_

Zoro wanted to puke at the pre-written words of the cards. They were so big and red and pink and just so … _heart-sy_ that Zoro couldn't stomach it all. He sighed and opened a new card.

 _Roses are red, violets are blue_

 _I don't need it to be Valentine's Day_

 _To tell you I love you!_

The fucking card was singing. It was singing a really stupid melodious song that made Zoro prepared to bash his head against the wall repeatedly until it stopped.

 _Make it stop, make it fucking stop!_

Zoro sighed. This was impossible. This had to be illegal, who the fuck bought a singing card? But judging by how there was only one left on the rack, a lot of people did. Yeah sure, he'd buy a stinking singing card. If only to give Sanji a heart attack when he opened it unsuspectingly.

"Zoro?"

"WHAT?!"

The moment the swordsman turned around, he saw Sanji staring at him strangely.

 _Oh, it's just Sanji— wait, why the fuck is Sanji here?_

Zoro swore under his breath. "Hey cook," he greeted the blond.

"Why are you here?" asked Sanji confused.

"Why are _you_ here?"

"We need to stop this whole repeating each other thing," Sanji told him. He sighed and rubbed at his arm a bit. Zoro would've thought it was just a habit of his, did he not know what Sanji did to his arms. He wanted to trust him, he did, especially after what he had told him on Christmas— well, the day before Christmas, but he couldn't help worrying.

What if he was hurt? Had he been at it again? Did it sting? Did it burn? Could Zoro do anything to help him?

"Stop looking at me like that," Sanji said. "It's creepy."

"I can look at you however the fuck I want," Zoro snapped back. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Never mind, this isn't going anywhere. If I won't tell you why I'm here and you won't tell me why you're here, we may as well move on from that and focus on something else."

"You said you hate Valentine's Day."

"Yeah? Your point?"

"Why are you in a card shop, in front of the Valentine's Day display?" Sanji asked, tilting his head to the side slightly. It was almost like there was some hopeful light in his eyes. Fuck, how had he not noticed it before? He hated to admit it, but Nami was right. Zoro really _did_ suck at reading body language.

"No reason." He couldn't take back what he said a few days ago, that'd be lying, but he couldn't say he was here to buy Sanji a card. Especially since he thought the cards were the stupidest thing on Earth. Sanji deserved better than pre-written words that came from some cheesy Shakespeare book.

Wait, Sanji liked Shakespeare, didn't he?

"I see …" Sanji shook his head. "You've been acting weird lately. I just wondered if you knew."

"Have I?" Zoro asked.

Of course he had been acting weird! After telling Sanji he hated Valentine's Day and realizing his mistake a few hours late, he couldn't go back on his word now, could he? So in his so far fruitless attempts to figure out what happened, Zoro was bound to act weird. Hell, he had walked into a book store! _A fucking book store!_

"I didn't notice."

Sanji gave him a strange look. "Never mind. Wanna go to the mall cafeteria? I'll let you hold my hand so you don't get lost," he teased.

"Fuck you," Zoro muttered but he grabbed Sanji's hand anyway and let the blush fill up his cheeks, noticing that Sanji was also matching the big red heart in one of the store's windows.

* * *

February 10th, 4 Days till Valentine's

* * *

Why was the week going by so quickly? Seven days should never pass this fast. When Zoro thought there had been plenty of time, three days had already passed and he was nowhere near close enough to figuring out what Sanji would want to do for Valentine's.

 _We should really communicate, shouldn't we?_ he wondered to himself with a sigh.

He flipped through his contacts. Who could he contact? Hmm, not Nami, she'd scream at him for still not figuring something out. No, he'd have to look somewhere else. Usopp? Nah. Maybe he could try … Luffy? Well, Luffy _had_ helped him figure out the weird feeling he got in his stomach around Sanji, he could try it …

The second he pressed call, he regretted it.

Luffy answered after two rings.

"Hey Zoro, what's up? Got trouble with Valentine's Day?"

"Sorta …" Zoro sighed and fisted his hair. He had developed the habit to yank at his own head when he got frustrated in an attempt to reign in his temper. It didn't work, but now he couldn't really stop since it had become instinctual, now could he? "What are you and Nami doing for Valentine's?"

"Us?" Luffy said in surprise. "We're going out to eat."

"Oh yeah?" Zoro asked. "Where to?"

"This high-class place, I finally have enough money to go to," Luffy said. "It's … dammit, what's it called? Something with an Artie thing in it. I think. There's a B in it too, sounds really elegant and that sort of thing."

Zoro's eyes widened. "Luffy, you wouldn't be taking Nami to the Baratie, would you?"

He heard Luffy snap his fingers. "Yeah! That's it!"

"No Luffy, you can't do that," Zoro said.

"Why?" Luffy asked. "I mean you went there all the time, right?"

"You can't go Luffy," Zoro repeated. "Trust me on that."

"But why?" He could practically see the man's slightly confused frown. "Is it cause of the money? Cause I think I can handle it Zoro."

"Luffy, it's not about the money, it's about the people!"

"Yeah they're really rich and famous," Luffy said. "I think I might have to leave my hat with Ace for the night …"

"No, that's not what I'm talking about Luffy!" Zoro sighed. He really didn't have patience for the straw hat. It was a miracle he hadn't strangled him yet. "Look, I'm your friend right? You have to trust me when I tell you that you shouldn't go to the Baratie. Don't."

"Okay," said Luffy. "But why?"

"Can't you just trust my judgement?" Zoro asked, exasperated.

"'M just curious."

"For … personal reasons," Zoro decided. Sanji could be considered a personal reason, right? He was Zoro's personal boyfriend after all.

"Okay," said Luffy. "But what am I supposed to do with all my money now?"

"Just buy a steak or something. There's a good steak house somewhere in Tokyo, I know it," Zoro said. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. "So don't go to the Baratie, there are tons of other places."

"Okay," Luffy said. "But Zoro?"

"Yeah?"

"You really need to think of something for Sanji."

Zoro sighed. "Like I didn't already fucking know. Talk to you later Luffy."

"Bye Zoro."

Zoro closed his phone and sighed. It was true, in the past four months or so, all he had been doing was eating either food from the Baratie, the occasional take-out and of course, Sanji's food. Where was a good place to take the blond?

Zoro's head shot up. He had an idea.

Immediately, he dialled the number and waited.

"Hello, this is the Orbit, would you like to make reservations?"

"Yes," Zoro said. "For two on February 14th."

There was scribbling on the other line, before it paused briefly. "February 14th?" the man on the phone repeated.

"Yes."

"I'm sorry sir, but that day is currently full, it _is_ Valentine's Day, you know."

"Of course I fucking know that," Zoro snapped. "Why else do you think I'm reserving?"

"I do believe most people make their dates a bit earlier than a few days in advance, especially on special occasions like Valentine's Day."

Zoro gritted his teeth. "Are you telling me I'm scatter-brained?"

"A bit, yes, sir," said the man on the phone. "My apologies, but unless there's a more specific reason for you to require a seating in our restaurant, I'm afraid there isn't anything I can do. You're not someone in great authority, are you?"

"No," Zoro said, hating the man on the phone more with every word he spoke.

"Then I'm sorry, but I don't believe we can accommodate you—"

"But," Zoro cut in, closing his eyes tightly. He hated throwing his name around, it didn't work for things that were a great big deal, but on the occasion, for small, trivial things like dinner reservations, it was enough. "I _am_ Zoro Roronoa."

Almost immediately, the man's entire demeanour changed. "Oh! Mr. Roronoa! Look at that, we just got an opening!"

"I thought so."

* * *

February 11th, 3 Days till Valentine's

* * *

Poetry was stupid.

Shakespeare was also stupid, as was Charles Dickens and anime in Zoro's humble opinion. Why was it that Sanji only liked stupid things?

Staring at the blank piece of paper, Zoro couldn't help but admit that it was hard to write something. To think of all sorts of metaphors and similes, he could admit that Shakespeare was kind of a genius, maybe just a little. But was it so fucking hard to write like a normal person? Why did he have to use all those "thee"s and "thy"s and "thou"s.

 _Okay, how do you even start a poem?_

Zoro raised his pencil slowly. Argh, this was a pain. Um, okay what about the beginning of that damn stupid card?

 _Roses are red, violets are blue—_

 _Wait, what the fuck? That's wrong._

Zoro shook his head. Well, not that wasn't totally wrong but …. Somehow, Zoro ended up writing his thoughts down as he thought them, his writing messier and even more illegible the more he wrote.

When he was done, he stared down at the piece of paper. It now read:

 _"Roses are red, violets are blue", that's what they say but it just isn't true, because roses are red and apples are too. But violets are violet. Violets aren't blue. An orange's orange, but Greenland's not green and a pinky's not pink. So what does it mean? To call something blue when it's not is to defile it, but ah heck, it's hard to rhyme "violet"._

Zoro was very proud of himself. He had managed to rhyme relatively well without sounding stupid.

The longer he stared at the piece of paper though, the more he found he was a fucking idiot.

He crumpled up the paper and threw it into the waste bin just when the door to the apartment opened. Sanji came walking in, cigarette in hand, putting his lighter into his pocket. His old lighter had been blue, this one was black. Zoro felt pride.

"What are you throwing out?" asked Sanji. "You should recycle you know, it saves trees and that sort of shit. Do you hate breathing?"

"Do _you_ hate breathing?"

"I thought we were going to stop repeating each other," Sanji said, giving him a pointed look.

"But _do_ you hate breathing?"

"What are you talking about?" Sanji asked, pulling the paper out of the waste bin.

"Well I mean you're contaminating your lungs. You're going to die young of cancer."

"Good, then I won't have to complain about my back and I'll look beautiful going into my coffin," Sanji teased.

Though he said it, Zoro knew Sanji didn't believe it. He didn't know what it was going to take, but he was willing to do anything to get Sanji to believe him and see the beauty he saw in the blond.

"What the fuck is this?"

Zoro looked up at the paper Sanji was pointing at.

"Wait, don't read that!" Zoro screamed, jumping out of his seat at the kitchen table trying to grab onto Sanji's arm to get it away from him.

" _Roses are red, violets are blue,_ huh?" Sanji read. "What, a love poem?"

"Not exactly," Zoro replied. "Can't you give it back to me?"

"Not exactly?" Sanji repeated.

"What happened to not copying each other?" Zoro teased.

"I think I'd like to read what kind of poetry a marimo can write." With that, Sanji proceeded to read Zoro's horribly written poem.

He watched as different emotions flickered across his face, from confusion to understanding to amused. "You don't have to be so literal, you know," he told Zoro.

"Yes, wonderful sensei, now will you just let me throw it out?" he asked. "It's useless—"

"I think I'm going to pin it up on the fridge," Sanji decided. Getting up on a chair (not that Sanji wasn't tall already), he put the piece of paper on the highest point on the fridge where neither could reach it, not unless they wanted to fight over a chair to get to it.

"There."

"I'm not in grade school," Zoro said through gritted teeth.

"Of course not, other wise I'd be framing your first D-," Sanji replied with a grin. He ruffled his hair. "Don't be so uptight Marimo, c'mon, I'll make dinner."

Zoro wondered what he had ever done to end up with Sanji.

While perhaps he may have been good for Sanji, he was pretty sure Sanji was even better for him.

With a grin, he proceeded to tease Sanji throughout the process of making his supper.

* * *

February 12th, 2 Days till Valentine's

* * *

Zoro hated ties.

He hated ties, suits, dress pants, dress shoes, bowties, blazers (unless they were Sanji's) and he really, _really_ hated tailors.

Zoro hadn't worn a tie since his graduation and even then, he had been playing with it so much that it had come undone by the time he had gone to get his diploma. He wondered what Sanji would've thought of him, a green haired kid in the back of the class, unable to pass math class but could pull the best marks in the grade when it came to gym and samurai history.

It didn't help that he was ticklish either.

"Stop moving!" the tailer told him with a firm glare. "You'll get poked with the needle!"

Zoro tried to stand still, but of course, he couldn't. It wasn't his fault that the feeling of the tailor's hands on his sides made him feel like he was being tickled. It was better to think he was being tickled rather than molested. Now a days, whenever someone other than his friends or Sanji touched his body, for some reason, Zoro assumed they were all out to touch him in … inappropriate places …

"Why's the seam green?" he asked the tailer, looking down at him as the man fixed the hemming.

"Because it suits you better."

"But I like blue," Zoro complained, knowing he sounded like a whiny kid, but not really caring at the moment. Blue was his favourite colour. It reminded him of the colour of the sky, of the ocean … and now of Sanji.

"And I like money," the tailor huffed. "You wouldn't look good in blue. We have a green tie for you as well, otherwise you'll be wearing black."

"Why does this shirt feel so weird?"

The man sighed and stood up. "Why are you wearing this?" he asked Zoro.

"Huh?"

"You don't seem like the type to go to formal places, so what is it? A wedding? A graduation ceremony?"

"None of those," Zoro replied. "Just … a date," he said softly. It would be their first official date and Zoro was beyond anxious about it.

"Oh yeah?" asked the tailor. "Well then, stop being so fidgety and you can surprise her with how well you clean up," the man said. "You have the face and the body to be rather attractive, you're not trying."

Zoro gave him a strange look. "Are you coming onto me?"

"Do you want me to?"

The rest of the fitting Zoro was as rigid as a board, trying not to move at all and he yelled whenever the tailor's perv-y hands went anywhere lower than his waist.

 _Sanji better be damn grateful._

"Hey! Don't touch me there!"

* * *

February 13th, 1 Day till Valentine's

* * *

Zoro wanted out. He was going to die, he knew it.

* * *

February 14th, 0 Days till Valentine's

* * *

Zoro felt sick. He wasn't a hundred percent sure he'd be able to go through with this. Not at all.

Still, he gave Sanji a smile and swallowed his pride and just about everything else that could possibly be contained in his body because otherwise, how else was he supposed explain his urge to puke? "So uh, you see … I wanted to um … I uh, got this place that we could er … go for the night and uh, y-yeah cause I … I figured you don't want to cook on Valentine's Day, right?"

Sanji gave him a strange look. "Um, okay," he said slowly. "Where are we going?"

"Orbit," Zoro forced the word out.

Sanji nodded. "When's the reservation for?"

"Um, about … half an hour?" Zoro said, checking his watch. It was also at this moment that he realized that he needed to change. He had not just spent four hours trying to avoid being groped by some perverted tailor to not wear the damn suit. "Get your blazer and wear something nice, it's a fancy place."

With that, he headed towards his room.

"You sure you can afford it?" asked Sanji, yelling down the hallway.

"It's on me!" Zoro said, slamming his door close.

He hated ties. He really did.

Putting on the nice fancy pants was easy, as was the blazer and doing up that annoying button that nearly suffocating him, but he still managed.

 _Fucking cooperate, damn tie!_

He so didn't want to do this, but he knew he'd look stupid without the tie. "Sanji?"

"Yeah?" came his voice.

"Could you … ah, could you help me with something?"

Sanji entered Zoro's room, almost immediately turning his back to the large full-length mirror. Zoro didn't know if he did it unconsciously. "Don't tell me you don't know how to get d—" Sanji cut himself off with a whistle. "What's with the get-up?" he asked.

"Just help me with the fucking stupid tie," Zoro snapped, holding out a his tie.

Sanji sighed and wrapped it around Zoro's neck. "Okay, watch me do this Marimo cause it's not that hard," Sanji told him. Zoro watched, sure. He watched the way Sanji's eyes were completely focused on his hands, the way his brow furrowed in concentration. "And then you just pull it through here." There was a tug and Zoro stumbled forward slightly.

Sanji put his hands on Zoro's chest, pushing him away lightly. "There you go," he said. He was looking at the ceiling. If he looked behind him, the mirror would be there.

"Where'd you learn to do that?" asked Zoro.

"Zeff," Sanji replied. He sent Zoro a glare, a blush on his cheeks. "Now I feel under-dressed."

"It's fine," Zoro insisted. "Come on, we should get going." He smirked. "I'll even use your present to get there."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "If you really wanted to impress me, you'd get there without the help of Siri."

"Tough shit, Siri's coming with us," Zoro said, pulling Sanji by his sleeve. "Now get into the car, Curly Brow."

* * *

This place was too fancy. True, the Baratie was sickening and made Zoro's stomach churn but the politeness of this place made him want to gag as well. Sanji fit in so perfectly here. Zoro on the other hand, felt like choking himself with his tie, though it wasn't like it wasn't doing that on its own.

"Any reason why we're here?" asked Sanji. "I thought we were just going to stay in and watch that Valentine's Day special of that stupid soap opera you like watching."

"Why do they call it a soap opera anyway?" Zoro asked curiously. Of course he was delaying Sanji from figuring out why they were in such a posh place, but then again, he actually was wondering about it.

"Because they're so dramatic and over-the-top that you want to scrub your eyes out with soap when the fucking episode that feels like a movie is over," Sanji said. Picking up the menu his eyes widened. "Holy fuck, Zoro this place is expensive!"

"You know the Baratie charged me roughly around this amount, right?" Zoro pointed out.

"We have good food, they might just be poisoning us," Sanji complained. Zoro wondered whether or not he realized that he still considered himself part of the Baratie, despite not stepping foot in there for over two months. "And when did you get a suit?"

"Um …" _It'd be weird if I said it was like, two days ago, right?_

"Never mind," Sanji said, waving his hand as though he could brush the matter off and let it fly away in the wind. "The service here is terrible," he muttered to himself, calling upon a waiter.

 _What the fuck was I thinking? Sanji worked in a restaurant, a really high-class one. This is like going wine testing with some snobbish woman who lathers on too much lipstick._ Zoro cringed at the thought of Sanji in lipstick. Sanji was male and he was better off that way too. _Something tells me he's going to critique everything …_

"Hey Zoro?" asked Sanji in a quiet voice, running his finger over the rim of his glass, the faintest sound of humming being able to be heard from the beverage. "Is … do you not like my cooking?"

"WHAT?!"

Everyone stared at him. Zoro didn't bother lowering his head in shame, he had gotten over it at this point. "How the fuck could you think that?" he demanded.

"Well I mean …" Sanji turned his head away from Zoro and seemed to fiddle a little with the buttons of his blazer. "We're at a fancy restaurant. We've never done this before and I mean, if you wanted to eat something nice, you could've just asked me. You didn't have to get yourself all dressed up and …" Sanji shook his head. "Never mind, it's stupid." He took a deep breath as though clearing his head.

 _Was that … a wheeze?_

Zoro was just about to ask him about it when Sanji called over a waiter. He ordered his meal like the gentleman he was and Zoro was tongue-tied, trying to remember how to pronounce common words like, "please" and "thank-you". He was so out of his league here.

"Are you okay?" Sanji asked Zoro when the water left.

"What do you mean am I okay?" Zoro squeaked. "I'm fine."

"You just look … uncomfortable," Sanji said. "We can go if you want."

"No, I'm good," Zoro replied. "I'm fine. Just … a little bit tense." He was freaking out and from the concerned look on Sanji's face, mixed with the confusion in his eyes, he had no idea why they were even where they were.

Sanji complained about the service thoroughly, and when their meals came, he sent his back to be reheated seeing as it had become lukewarm.

Zoro was fidgeting with his collar. Why were there so many buttons and why did the one at the very top have to be done up? He was pretty sure he was choking from the collar, if not the tie. The sweat started to drip down his forehead and he wondered whether or not it would be rude to undo his tie (not that he knew how to do that) and unbutton maybe two or three or all of the buttons on his shirt. He felt like he was suffocating. His fingers quivered as they tried to undo the top button, but every time it seemed close, it would slip out of his grasp. He blamed his meaty swordsman hands.

"Zoro—" Sanji turned in his direction at that moment. He put down his glass and leaned across the table, loosening Zoro's tie and undoing the top button. He could breathe! It was a miracle! Sanji paused for a moment before pulling the tie off entirely and popping the next two buttons as well. "Better?" he asked.

"Yeah," Zoro said, trying to catch his breath.

"Don't force yourself to be here if you really feel uncomfortable," Sanji told him. "I don't mind."

"No, we're staying," Zoro said firmly. "At least until we've both eaten."

Sanji nodded, but his brow was furrowed, probably trying to figure it out.

Zoro waited until Sanji's plate came back before he ate.

"You didn't have to wait," Sanji told him. "Your meal's probably a bit cold now."

"It's fine," Zoro told him with a shrug. "I don't mind. Besides, eating on my own at a table across from you just means you can hear the chewing sounds I make and it's kinda gross." He instantly froze. God he was so strange, wasn't he?

Sanji let out a laugh. It was soft but it wasn't mocking or patronizing. "Oh yeah?" he asked. He took his fork and put it in Zoro's food, stealing some. Taking a bite, he frowned. "This is practically frozen. I'll ask to send it back—"

"No!"

Sanji froze. He had been about to pick up Zoro's plate, probably planning on heading into the kitchen itself and demand they be treated better, but Zoro grabbed his arm and stopped him. "It's fine," he said for what felt like the thousandth time.

"Zoro, do you want to tell me why we're here?" Sanji asked, giving him a strange look. "Because you're really starting to worry me."

Zoro sighed. Okay, how did he put this? He couldn't just babble everything out, could he?

"Well, see, remember when I asked you what you thought about Valentine's Day? And then I told you I hated it and then you said we wouldn't be celebrating so then I was like, okay, cool, and then I told Nami about it and she slapped me and lectured me on body language and how you're such a fucking romantic, which means that you love Valentine's Day and were lying through your teeth, so then she told me I had to fix it. So I went to this chocolate store, right? And do you remember that guy from the flower shop? I think he's a stalker, I swear, cause he was there and he gave me Belgium chocolate cause he said it was good and apparently his name's Typhoon, which is really weird— well no, it's not Typhoon, it's Nowaki, but it's the same thing, right? Anyway, then I thought that was stupid so I didn't give them to you but I have them in the back of the car if you do want them, but I think they're totally melted by now … Then I wanted to get you manga or anime or something and how was I supposed to know I was in the shōjo section? They should really have signs for that! And that stuff's aimed towards girls? What kind of fucked up shit is that, perverted demons and alien stalkers from planet Pheromone? Even the employee who worked there had to be a pedophile, I think he's dating someone like, at least six years younger then him! I'm sure that short guy was a minor!" Zoro took a deep breath and continued before he could stop himself. "And so then I thought hey, why not get you a card? Except those cards are crappy and they fucking sing— Sanji, who the fuck would buy a _singing card_? And then you were there and I don't know why you were there, but you were and so then I ditched that idea. So then I called Luffy cause I had no fucking clue what to do so I asked him what he was doing with Nami— don't look at me like that, I know you're not a girl! And he said he was taking her to a fancy restaurant so I was like, okay, sure so then I had to call up the Orbit and toss my name around and then it was after that and after I tried poetry cause you like Shakespeare and that shit, but then well it turned out like _that_ and you saw it and it was horrible and I swear in the middle of the night I'm ripping it off the fridge, but anyway, it wasn't till after the shitty poetry that I learnt they had a fancy dress code or something so this perverted tailor ended up feeling me up to get my size and stuff and dear God, I swear, is everyone gay? And I know I'm ranting and this is incredibly weird and all, but I'm paying the bill and you couldn't be grateful that I took you here, you bastard, I mean I'm going to be totally broke when this is over and what do you do? You're like the pickiest eater in the entire fucking world! It's not my fault that I screwed up— okay, it is, but I just wanted to do something for you even if Valentine's Day is bullshit and now we're going to get kicked out of the fucking restaurant because I couldn't fucking breathe!"

Zoro took several deep breaths, trying to catch it back. He gulped, his throat feeling dry. He tossed his head back and drank his glass dry until the only thing left were the small ice cubes at the bottom, which he then tossed into his mouth and began to crush with his teeth. "I fucking swear, if I develop a habit of eating ice every time I need a fucking drink, so help me God, I'd rather take the sake."

It was once the last ice cube made its way down his throat and he shivered that he realized Sanji was dead silent. He felt like crawling in on himself, keeping quiet and not saying a word. This was totally awkward, totally not healthy and he felt totally bad about the whole thing. He bit his bottom lip, gnawing at it. He pushed out his chair and put his jacket back on. "I'll get the car," he muttered, shoving the tie into his back pocket.

Still, Sanji said nothing and the panic in Zoro's chest finally fell to complete and utter embarrassment. What the hell was he doing? He should've just let them leave the whole fucking Valentine's Day thing alone but _noooo_ , he had to press the issue and end up in this situation. He wouldn't be surprised if he was single come morning.

"The car's in the other direction, Marimo."

Zoro stopped and turned around to see Sanji getting up. He was tucking in his chair, as well as the chair Zoro had just left for grabs and took out his wallet. He put at least 100 00 yen on the table. He walked ahead towards the front and Zoro followed him, feeling a bit like a kicked puppy. Oh God, he was going to be a kicked swordsman soon, wasn't he?

Somehow, he couldn't bring himself to care.

Sanji thanked the man at the reception for the meal and pardoned them (pardoned, he didn't excuse, he _pardoned_ ) for causing a disturbance.

Once they were outside in cold, the snow falling, Zoro found himself wanting to smile. It kind of reminded him of a movie. Then again, with what had just transpired in the restaurant, this was probably a break-up scene. Sanji stood at the driver's seat and gestured towards the car. "Get in," he said.

He sounded so cold, Zoro shivered, which had nothing to do with the snow that slipped underneath his collar. He nodded and got into the passenger seat, not even arguing about how it was _his_ car and how he should drive (it only made sense, right?).

Zoro sighed. "Look, Sanji, I'm s—"

Sanji cut Zoro off by kissing him.

With his arms wrapped around the green-haired swordsman, he pulled him closer, pulling at the collar of his jacket to bring him nearer to him. Sanji was ruthless as he kissed him, pressing his lips harshly against Zoro's, biting at him feverishly. Zoro pulled Sanji closer, the armrest between them only serving as a nuisance. Sanji pulled at Zoro's hair, bringing him even nearer, if possible.

"Ahou," he muttered against Zoro's lips as he practically climbed over the armrest to rest in Zoro's lap.

He pressed the swordsman against the back-rest of the seat, his hands going underneath Zoro's jacket to his dress shirt, Sanji's cold hands running over the exposed skin from Zoro's unbuttoned shirt. He ran his fingers through Zoro's hair, combing through them, his nails digging into his scalp, making a moan escape the younger man's throat.

"Fuck, what are you doing to me?" Zoro asked, kissing him back fiercely, his hands running down Sanji's arms to his waist, then lower to his thigh. He massaged it gently, trying to pull him closer to him.

The blond gasped, breaking away from Zoro, burrowing his head into Zoro's neck. He could feel Sanji's breath on his neck. He seemed to be trying to catch his breath but there was something about the way he drew in his breaths that hinted it was more than just being breathless. He raked his fingers through Sanji's hair, wondering what had just happened.

 _Am I dreaming? Is this a parallel universe?_

The two had shared several kisses, but nothing like this and _never_ initiated by Sanji. Aside from the surprise blowjob, Sanji had never started anything intimate like this. The two had kissed, they had never made-out. It had never been so raw, so desperate as just now and Zoro's head was still spinning as Sanji stayed in his lap, breathing softly onto his neck.

"Do you know," said Sanji in a quiet voice, whispering in Zoro's ear, "what I do on Valentine's?"

Zoro tried not to shiver. God he loved Sanji's voice. "No," he said in a hoarse voice.

"I'm watching couples come into the Baratie, hand in hand," he said. "They sit down and begin to talk, pointless things, really. They order a special and steal kisses, say sweet nothings to each other." Sanji's hands were running up and down Zoro's bare skin. He felt like he'd hold his breath forever if Sanji would just keep doing that, stroking his chest, occasionally slipping even further underneath his shirt. He let out a gasp, but stayed silent otherwise, trying to listen. He knew this was important for Sanji, what he wanted to say. "When they're done, either the man pays, or they split the bill and leave, hand in hand. Do you know what I'm doing while they're doing that?"

"No," Zoro said softly.

"I'm running between the kitchen and the dining hall," said Sanji, a hint of sadness in his voice. "And do you want to know what you just did for me, Zoro?" he asked quietly.

Zoro stayed silent, knowing this wasn't a question he was meant to answer.

"I didn't have to watch," Sanji answered for him. "I didn't have to watch, I was able to _be_ watched."

He puled away from Zoro's ear and looking at him with eyes that held so much emotion, Zoro couldn't tell just what it was that was in his ocean blue eye, just that it was beautiful and he wanted to kiss him again.

"Thank you," Sanji said softly, looking like he was on the verge of tears. "Thank you so much."

Zoro gently put a hand on Sanji's cheek, pulling him closer. Sitting in his lap made Sanji taller, causing Zoro to raise his head, but he didn't care. He gave Sanji a soft kiss, his lips barely skimming his. "My pleasure."

"HEY! BASTARDS, YOU GONNA MOVE YOUR FUCKING CAR?!"

Sanji jumped and scurried over back to the driver's seat, Zoro's heart still racing a thousand miles per second. Sanji rolled down the window and screamed several cuss words of his own back at the one who had yelled at them before he backed them out of the parking lot and headed back to the apartment.

Zoro couldn't help letting out a sign of relief. He couldn't believe that had just happened. He was high off it. It was fucking amazing. The fact that he had feared a break-up had probably made the event about a thousand times better.

They drove in silence for a while before Sanji spoke. "Were you really molested by a tailor?"

Zoro let out a laugh. "You have no idea how many times he went for my crotch," he said, shaking his head. "So, you're really not mad?"

"Why would I be mad?" Sanji asked, making a turn.

"Because I practically got us kicked out of a restaurant and the service was horrible and I told you I hated Valentine's Day," Zoro listed.

"You're right, I should totally kick you out," Sanji said. "Get out, walk the rest of the way."

Zoro stared at him, wide eyed.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "I'm kidding. Look, maybe you did kind of go over the top and totally screwed it up—"

"Gee, thanks," Zoro muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Hey, I'm giving you feedback, you should be taking notes for next year."

"I thought I couldn't keep you around to next December, never mind February?" Zoro teased quizzically.

Sanji's eyes didn't leave the road for a second. "I can be persuaded," he said casually, but even in the low lighting, Zoro could see he was blushing. "Anyway just so you know, Belgium chocolate's got alcohol in it, so stay away from it. You should be able to tell the difference between shōjo and shōunen manga and besides, I don't need any anime, I'm taping my shows on your PVR—"

"Wait, are you taking up all my space?!"

"— also, don't talk about good looking people around me, I probably won't be in a good mood for the rest of the day. Give me the name of that tailor, I'll make sure to kick him in the balls. Hard. Don't keep chocolate in your car, it won't do you good and the cleaning bills will be ridiculous, I swear, open your trunk and feel the deep regret of buying expensive Belgium shit. Next time you go to Zoro Books, bring me with you, I have to kick the pedophile in the balls too. Don't look at me like that, it's called Marimo Books, of course I'll call it Zoro Books. I could've called it Idiot-Swordsman Books, so be grateful I didn't. If you want a fancy meal, ask me, don't send me to crappy restaurant like that. If we ever find that Typhoon guy again, we're filing a restraining order, so remember his name cause he's so insignificant to me, I've already forgotten it. And I swear if you ever freak me out as much as you did this past week, I'll be kicking _you_ in the balls so hard, you won't be able to pass on your weird-ass green hair genes." Sanji took a moment to pause, looking at Zoro briefly before putting his eyes back on the road. "Lastly, you look good in a suit, but …" Sanji was blushing, Zoro knew it. "You look even better right now."

Zoro blushed, staring down at his practically half-bare chest. "Thanks."

"Don't say that, that sounds conceited," Sanji snapped at him. They turned another corner. "You're lucky I like you cocky," he said with a smirk.

It was official. Zoro was absolutely head over heels for the man and he might just burst if he didn't tell him.

It was once they got back into the apartment and Zoro lay in bed thinking about how he'd tell Sanji that he may have possibly just realized he was hopelessly in love with him that Zoro realized something.

Sanji's birthday was coming up.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : The monster under my bed, huh? I thought I had already exorcised them... Oh well. I kinda wanted the fight scene to be one of those where Sanji gets one up on Zoro, but it was a matter of pride in a different sense then you might thing. See, before Sanji kicked him in the head, he gave Zoro this look and though I didn't describe it that much since Sanji's focus was more on finishing the fight, Zoro understood it as a look that meant "I feel very bad for you", when Sanji was actually apologizing for what he was about to do. I didn't want Sanji to win because he was just naturally better than Zoro because I like to think of them as equals, so I had to give Sanji a reason and that reason was his inability to breathe while he was fighting. All of his moves became desperate and quick and he needed a quick ending because he was having a bit of trouble breathing and while he was getting tired out, Zoro had great stamina. Thank you, I honestly don't think my writing's all that good, I'm good at writing characters if I can relate to them so when I did this AU, I made Sanji really self-conscious. Fits me pretty well, but I have Zoro's stubbornness and I do resort to "SHUT UP!" when I can't think of anything else to say in an argument. On days when stuff really doesn't go well, I kinda feel like I'm this AU version of Sanji, course, I'm not suicidal and not that big of a fan of Shakespeare but ... well yeah._

 _Neo Rulez: Thank you! I realize you wrote this review for chapter 1, so seeing my response to your chapter might take a while, but I'm always happy when I get new readers! And by Neo, do you mean Neo from **The Matrix?**_

 _Random person : Um... what does that mean?_

 _Shizuka Taiyou: You seriously read my mind. Well, not the thing about **Digimon** , but I was thinking about writing a chapter where they have an anime marathon, just to have Zoro react to things. I'm having great fun with him!_

 _lilcutieprincess (x3): Okay so I listened to that song and after about twenty seconds I was like, "That's the theme song fo **r Pretty Little Liars,** isn't it?" and then I just went totally still and got paranoid. I don't watch the show but damn that song's creepy. I hope you liked this chapter, I worked really hard to get it this way!_

 _fangal4life : Okay, I'm not sure if this is going to make you stop reading because of my inexperience, but confession time: um, the main reason I know of Ace's existence is because my friend was like, "you should watch **One Piece**!" So I did and after like, 15 episodes I still couldn't get over Luffy's name cause I used to pronounce it like "fluffy" without the f and then I was like, "why does he have no muscle if his punches hurt that much?" and then she was like, "he has a brother! But he dies!" and then I just got pissed at her. I haven't seen One Piece in a while, I have a window open to watch more of it. Now here's the real confession: I'm not far enough in the anime to have even met Ace. Yup, that's sad, I know. I looked him up on the **One Piece** wikipedia, he turns up around episode 91 or something, right? I'm like in the mid-60s right now. Yup, it's sad, I know. I put him in there because I've read a lot of **One Piece** stories for Zoro and Sanji and they always have Ace in there, somewhere when it's an AU, so I put him in. He doesn't play that big of a role. I swear when I watch more of the show, this whole story's going to be revised to put more characters in cause I seriously haven't met them yet. God, is that pathetic? To write for a fandom you know close to nothing about? Yeah, probably ... I know I do that too, people tend to get rid of the chemistry once they're together and I'm sure it's not on purpose, but it shows. I hope I didn't do that though, I hope you still think they're goo!_

 _Okay, so I'm going to give you the challenge of naming all the things I referenced in here cause yeah, I used more references. A lot of them. Also, as for the reason why **Black Butler** and yaoi was with the shōjo ... well let's be honest, it's mostly girls who love yaoi, right? There are 2 characters in this chapter who I do not own, who I want you to figure out who they are as well._

 _Now I shall proceed to tell you some songs from this story's playlist because I can't write in silence. If you want, listen to them. You can tell me if you agree with my choices._

 _ **Better Than I Know Myself** by Adam Lambert._

 _ **Just Might Change Your Life** by Sidewalk Prophets. _

_**By Your Side** by Tenth Avenue North_

 _ **Healing Begins** by Tenth Avenue North_

 _ **You Are More** by Tenth Avenue North (ignore the fact that it sounds pretty religious)_

 _ **The Last Night** by Skillet, it was a chapter title, it was placed here because ... yeah._

 _ **Distance** by Chrstina Perri and Jason Marz (is that how you spell it?)_

 _ **Try** by Colbie Caillat (I can't spell her name, forgive me) because I know the song sounds girly and the music video focuses on girls, but the message is clear and I think it would really mean something to Sanji._

 _ **Lego House** by Ed Sheeran. _

_**Everything is Alright** by Motion City Soundtrack_

 _ **Little Things** by One Direction_

 _ **Bless The Broken Road** by Rascal Flatts_

 _ **Brave** by Sarah Bareilles (can't spell these people's names ...)_

 _Okay, those are all the songs I'm going to tell you for now. And yes, I do listen to a strange variety of music that comes from just about everywhere. Also, ignore how all these songs mainly speak about heterosexual relationships._


	30. Say I Love You

_**Author's Note:** So it was after I published the chapter and checked the site that it told me I had reached over 200 thousand words and I nearly died. Granted, a lot of it is from author notes, but still ... Anyway, I've got chapter 31 written as well, but chapter 32 is pissing me off. Also, some info, I have at least 40 chapters imagined with plots in them but after that I'm drawing a blank. I can't figure out where this story will end. I think I'm one of those few people who are writing a story where the reviewers haven't killed me since I've written 200 thousand words without any sex despite the M rating (unless you count rape and that scene still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth ...) Okay, so I don't own **One Piece** or **Rurouni Kenshin** (I just like to watch it, I'm trying to find the live-action movie with English subs, but it keeps stopping and starting so uh yeah, that's pissing me off). The grammar of these lyrics written-wise are killing me, but I'll suffer anyway because I really do love this song. Another thing to note, there are some things in here you might not understand. One, the term **kare-shirt**. I read it from **Love Stage ! !** It's the erotic sight of seeing a girl in her boyfriend's shirt. **Aishiteru** is different from **daisuki** and **suki**. **Suki** and **daisuki** both mean a form of "like", saying "I like you" or "I really like you". However in the case of " **Aishiteru** " it means "I'm in love with you". I've been told that this is a phrase that's rarely used by anyone because t's very personal and such. Therefore, someone saying this, it means a lot and I swear, every time I watch an anime and someone says they like someone I read the subs and then rewind and I'm like, "Did they say like or love?". I read a manga call **Count 10** (well, I'm reading, I'm not done but I'm close but it's still going on, I think my manga app's weird) and for some reason, I really think I might write a fanfiction for Zoro and Sanji based off that manga ... Once I get some complexities figured out. I'm not a big fan of stories that just replace characters with other ones and keep the story line the exact same to the last detail (reading **Titanic** stories, I read one for **Harry Potter** and nothing changed at all from the film) so I would be changing it up. If you're interested, let me know. I already have another **One Piece** story I want to write, along with 2 **Naruto** stories, but the details haven't been figured out yet._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **There's a bit of hotness**

* * *

Chapter 30: Say I Love You

 _There's only  
_ _ONE thing (one)  
_ _TWO do (two)  
_ _THREE words (three)  
_ _FOUR you... (four)  
_ _(I love you) I love you  
_ _There's only  
_ _ONE way (one)  
_ _TWO say (two)  
_ _Those THREE words (three)  
_ _And that's what I'll do... (four)  
_ _(I love you) I love you_ \- The Plain White Ts, _1234_

* * *

 _As of today, I am officially dating a younger man. Heh. I wonder what Zoro thinks of that. He's probably not happy, knowing him._

Sanji smirked, staring the ceiling of the guest bedroom. Living with Zoro … He honestly hadn't expected it to last this long. He had thought that the swordsman would take him in for perhaps two months at most and then send him on his way with a pat on the back and maybe, if he was lucky, a couple of yen. But two months had come and gone and now he was on the fifth month, he believed. Something like that.

He remembered waking up in what he later found out was Zoro's room and of course, that awful mixture of gunk that somehow passed as food in Zoro's eyes. Six months of knowing him, at least. He had spent the better part of the first half thinking he was an utter asshole, while he had spent the more recent months wondering what he had done to deserve him.

When Sanji had imagined getting into his first ever serious relationship, he really hadn't pictured this. He hadn't pictured days of sparring, people wearing straw hats demanding meat, gambling addicted redheads or liars who could put Pinocchio to shame. He hadn't imagined that the first person he'd kiss would be a man, never mind a man like Zoro. He had never imagined that he'd have left the Baratie, or that he'd stop cutting.

While he hadn't been expecting this outcome which he was beyond elected about, he didn't like the circumstances and the events that had caused this to happen. Of course, he didn't regret them, but he would've been just as happy had they not happened. But then again, who was to say he'd have even met Zoro and gotten to know him the way he did now if he hadn't?

The most surprising thing about this entire situation to the newly turned twenty-four year old wasn't that his lover —fuck, _boyfriend_ (that flower shop person was rubbing off on him) was well, not a _girl_ friend. It wasn't that in order to get here, he'd have needed to be abducted. In fact, he wasn't sure when it was but, but eventually he began to look at the kidnapping as one of the greatest things that had ever happened to him. It wasn't that he was now earning himself money via fighting against his idiot boyfriend, or that his boyfriend had green hair. _Natural_ green hair. Perhaps these things may have worried a normal person, would make them rethink their situation, but not for Sanji. No, rather, it was one thing that was nagging at him and it was about what he wanted for his birthday.

Most of the time on his birthday, he didn't hope for much. Maybe a little less shoving in the kitchen, maybe a chance to sneak away and buy himself new cigarettes. The concept of even daring to ask for a birthday cake was out of the question. He had been living without much, so he didn't expect much. But there was one thing he wanted for his birthday and it wasn't even materialistic. No, it was something from the swordsman.

Sanji shut his eyes tightly and sighed, his chest tightening at the thought.

 _I want Zoro to tell me he loves me._

The idea was just plain unfair, he knew that. Sanji wasn't even sure if he loved the swordsman and he wasn't going to say something he didn't mean, he had never been one of those guys and he liked to think he'd never be. But to hear Zoro tell him … He'd like for it to happen. He sat up in his bed and lit a new cigarette.

 _You're fucking spoiled, aren't you?_ he mused to himself. _You have an amazing boyfriend who made Christmas more than just bearable and treated you out on a holiday he admitted to hating. You know he's out of your league, don't you?_

Sanji tried his hardest not to grit his teeth at that thought. He knew. He knew and maybe that was part of the reason why he wanted to hear the swordsman tell him he loved him.

Zoro was like Sanji, he didn't often say things he didn't mean and that would mean that if he told Sanji he loved him, it would be real. It would stop the large bubble of insecurity that just kept inflating each and every time he looked at him. Though that strange voice was gone, it didn't mean he didn't still feel self-conscious.

"Sanji?"

"Yeah?" Sanji called to Zoro. He wondered why his voice sounded so close when there was a soft knock on the door.

"Can I come in?" asked Zoro.

Sanji's brow furrowed. "Why not?"

Zoro walked in and Sanji was in for quite a surprise.

Zoro stood before Sanji trying to balance a tray in his hands. The tray was filled with an assortment of things, from fruit salad to oatmeal. It was a pretty standard breakfast, didn't contain all the nutrients that half of Sanji's meals provided, but it made the blond smile nonetheless. There was a glass of milk that seemed to be what was troubling the swordsman very much as he tried not to make it spill.

"You can balance swords, but not a tray?" Sanji teased.

"Shut up," Zoro muttered. "I had to get up really early to make this," Zoro told him in a slightly snappish voice. "And then I had to call the witch and ask for instructions."

"You went to Nami? And don't call her a witch," Sanji said, frowning slightly.

"No. First I went to the Internet because I didn't want to talk to her and besides, no one besides you is up at this ungodly hour," he added. "Um, I tried to make eggs, but uh, that didn't go so well …" Zoro was blushing. He turned his head away, as though trying to hide it but it was there, across his tanned cheeks.

"So that's the strange smell …"

"Hey!"

"I'm just teasing," Sanji assured him. "So what's the occasion?"

"It's your birthday," Zoro said in a soft voice. "So I figured …"

"Breakfast in bed?" Sanji let out a light laugh. "I know what day it is, I just wanted to make sure you knew."

"Like I'd forget," Zoro muttered.

"That's sweet," Sanji teased. "So are you going to give me my miniature feast?"

Zoro shook his head. "I can take it back and we could go out, I know I'm not good at cooking," he said. "I think it's kind of an insult to feed a cook as good as you food that's crappier than some American pop music. I can just—"

"No," Sanji said. "I want it."

Zoro blushed.

"The only reason you're blushing so much is because you think you're embarrassing yourself."

"Aren't I?"

Sanji shook his head. "Come on, eat with me."

Zoro took the tray off the table and slowly sat on the edge of Sanji's bed. He placed the tray on Sanji's lap and then proceeded to twiddle with his thumbs.

"Could you get me a shirt?" Sanji asked, suddenly realizing he was bare-chested. "It's um, kind of cold in here."

Zoro shook his head. "No it isn't."

Sanji turned his head away. "Zoro, please," he said quietly. "I'm cold," he lied.

He expected Zoro to get up and go over to his closet, asking him if he wanted pinstripes or just a plain dress shirt. Instead, the bed shifted slightly, but not because the man had stood up. Instead, the bed shifted as Zoro shifted his weight, leaning over the edge of the bed as he took off his shirt.

"W-what are you doing?!" Sanji demanded, his voice rising to a rather feminine and unmanly octave (not that he'd ever admit it).

"I'm giving you a shirt," Zoro said with a shrug. He threw the grey shirt over to Sanji and in shock, Sanji still managed to catch it.

"B-but now you're …" Sanji trailed off.

"Shirtless, I know," Zoro said with a grin. "It's fine." He took a bagel from the tray and took a bite out of it. "I think I put too much cream cheese … Fuck, I should've asked how you like it, shouldn't I have? Baka," he muttered to himself.

"It's fine," Sanji said, slipping Zoro's shirt over his head.

The shirt was a bit big on him, but it was comfortable and smelled like Zoro. The familiar scent of steel, mint and Zoro filling his senses. He took the glass of milk, wondering if Zoro could see how his hands were shaking as he brought it up to his lips.

Zoro turned away from him, blushing.

"What?"

"Nothing," Zoro muttered. "Just … I've never experienced kare-shirt like this before …"

Sanji gaped at him.

 _He … he thinks I look good in his shirt?_

 _No, Sanji, you idiot, he thinks you look_ ** _erotic_** _in his shirt!_

And then Sanji remembered exactly what kare-shirt was. "I'm not a girl!"

"I know you're not," Zoro said, rolling his eyes.

"Are you going to stare at my blazer during all of breakfast?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow at him. "Or are we actually going to engage in normal conversation?"

Zoro let out a grunt. "Just give me a minute …"

Sanji shook his head and dipped his spoon in the oatmeal. It was a little watery, but otherwise it was fine. "So what are we going to do today?"

"Anything you want," Zoro said with a shrug, slowly turning back around. He seemed to be trying to breathe like a normal person, but he was having difficulty. "Unlike _some_ people, I'm not going to distract them with word games all day."

"And if I just want to play a word game all day?"

Zoro bit the inside of his cheek. "I suppose we could do that, if you want to …" He trailed off. "How's the food?"

"Not bad," Sanji said with a shrug.

"There's no need to be nice," Zoro said. "I know I'm not good at this."

"Then I suppose it's a good thing you have me, isn't it?" he teased. "Come on Marimo, I'm not going to bite. You can come closer."

Zoro shook his head. "I'm good."

"Get your fucking ass next to me now or else I'm throwing this oatmeal at you."

Zoro quickly moved himself around the bed until he was lying next to Sanji, his feet hanging off the side of the bed. He put his arms behind his head in an attempt to get more comfortable but with the small space of the bed, it was pretty hard. It was funny, Sanji considered Zoro to be tall, but not to a giant and yet in this small bed, that was the impression he was getting.

"Shut up, it was your idea," Zoro told him with a huff.

"We kinda look like a married couple, don't we?" Sanji asked. "Like a husband treating his wife on Mother's Day or something."

"Are you saying we'd have kids?" Zoro asked. "I didn't know I worked so fast."

It was at that moment that Sanji froze. "I just referred myself as a woman, didn't I?"

Zoro smirked. "I was wondering when you'd notice."

Sanji kicked him, the covers over his legs softening the blow, but since Zoro was lying in such a strange position it didn't take much for him to fall off the bed.

"Fuck, that hurt!" Zoro complained, sitting up on the floor. He sighed and rubbed his head. "I think I'm in an abusive relationship. Should I call and report domestic violence?"

"Oh yes, I'm so cruel to you," Sanji said, rolling his eyes.

"Come here," Zoro said, waving a finger at him. "I need to get even."

Sanji moved a bit farther from the edge of the bed where Zoro was. "If you hadn't told me that I might've come."

"Shit, my plan's been ruined, hasn't it?" Zoro teased. He stood up and took the tray off Sanji's bed, just as the man was about to take another spoonful of the oatmeal. He put it on Sanji's desk, smirking. "You have the list here?"

"Yeah," Sanji said softly. "But I was eating," he changed the topic, feeling a blush on his cheeks. It was a hot in here, wasn't it?

"Do you remember number nine?"

"You didn't number them, Marimo, remember?"

Zoro's smirk could be felt, despite the fact that his back was to Sanji. "I didn't want you to think that all of your traits were so few in number that they made a list. Giving you a list of reasons with numbers, that gives you a limited number of compliments, doesn't it? Besides, I think I'm going to add another on there."

"Oh yeah?"

"So? Do you remember it?" Zoro asked.

"Remember what?"

"Number nine."

"Yes," he said softly. Zoro didn't have to know he had practically memorized the list of reasons down to the last coma. "The way you bite your lip." As he spoke, he gnawed at his bottom lip.

"That's right."

"Can I have my food now?" Sanji asked. His throat was dry and while watery oatmeal wasn't the greatest thing, it helped quench his thirst at the moment.

"If I did," Zoro said softly, turning around and getting back on the bed. "I wouldn't be able to do this."

And then he kissed him.

Well, fuck oatmeal, Zoro's mouth was so much hotter.

Sanji gripped the swordsman who towered over him, pulling him closer. His heart was racing, his breath caught in his throat as he ran his fingers through Zoro's hair. He could feel Zoro brushing his hand against Sanji's cheek and the older man felt like melting into his touch. Zoro's kisses were always hot, no matter how they were delivered, always made him feel lightheaded. The fact that his hands could now roam across his bare skin was amazing, he could feel the scars underneath his palms, the rough texture and the outline of his abs.

With a light push on Zoro's chest, he gasped, trying to catch his breath.

"Good point," he said in a hoarse voice.

Zoro was looking at him with eyes that seemed to hold so much, speaking volumes without a single word coming out of his lips. They parted slowly and he took a deep breath, as though trying to prepare himself for what he wanted to say. "Sanji …" His voice was soft and Sanji found that he loved the way the green-haired man said his name. "I …" Zoro licked his lips, Sanji watching his tongue as it traced over them and instinctively, he copied the movement. "I—"

 _DING! DONG! DING! DONG!_

"Fuckers," Zoro muttered. He pushed himself off the bed and left the room to answer the door.

Sanji let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding. God his chest felt tight … He needed a smoke.

Taking out his pack, he lit one up and breathed it in.

That look in Zoro's eyes … it haunted him. What had he been about to say? He had looked so anxious, so … scared and yet at the same time, he had looked like there was nothing more he wanted to do than tell Sanji what was on his mind, even if the words wouldn't come out.

"Sanji!" That was Luffy. It was early, what was he doing at their apartment? "Can you make me some meat? Nami says we're out of bacon!"

With a sigh, Sanji left his room and entered the living room to see Luffy wearing a big grin on his face. "So that's where Zoro's shirt went!" He grinned and turned to Zoro. "You know, you have that sex glow again."

"I didn't have sex," Zoro said in an annoyed tone. "Sanji, make the man bacon so he can get the fuck out of here."

Sanji complied, laughing all the while during the time Zoro yelled at Luffy rather loudly that he hadn't "gotten laid to the point where he could be a skin model". Sanji remembered hearing once that sex was good for your skin. He laughed lightly and turned the bacon over. "It'll be ready soon," he told Luffy. "It's like, almost eight, what are you doing up?" he asked the straw hat.

"I always get up early," said Luffy with a big grin.

"I thought you were like Zoro, sleeping in until it's practically night again."

"No, I get up early," Luffy replied. "But I take a few naps …"

"At your age?"

"Nap time was the greatest thing about school," Luffy said fondly. "But anyway, what's up? Why's Zoro up?"

Zoro whispered in Luffy's ear and the dark haired man's eyes widened. "It's your birthday?!"

Sanji nodded. "Yeah, it's no big deal though," he said hastily, taking the bacon out of the pan and slipping it onto a plate. "You sure you don't want anything else? I don't mind making more than bacon."

"Now I feel bad," Luffy said with a small frown. "It's your birthday and I made you cook for me …"

Sanji took a piece of bacon off the plate. Bacon was too greasy in his opinion, but he ate it anyway. "There. Now I've cooked for myself as well." He tried not to cringe as the horribly oily piece of meat went down his throat.

"Hey! Don't touch my bacon!" Luffy said, pulling the plate away from him.

Sanji gave him a strange look.

Luffy picked up the plate and waved at the two. "I should go, shouldn't I?"

"Why?" asked Sanji, wondering whether or not he really wanted an answer.

"Well, since it's Sanji's birthday and all," Luffy said slowly, "you're going to spend the day in bed, right?"

"WHAT?!" both he and Zoro demanded, their voices cracking.

Luffy laughed loudly. "I'll leave you to it, okay? Just remember to be safe!"

With that, he left the apartment, shutting the door with a loud _SLAM_!

Sanji and Zoro stood dumbfounded for a few seconds.

Finally, Sanji managed to speak. "He … he thinks I'm going to spend my birthday being fucked by you?"

Zoro shook his head, a disgusted look on his face and though Sanji wasn't planning on having sex with the Marimo for quite some time, he felt a little disappointed. Was the idea of fucking him so bad? He remembered how Zoro could get hard just from kissing him. Surely, he wasn't repulsed by Sanji … was he?

"I can't believe that guy!" Zoro said in a huff.

"Yeah, I know, right?" Sanji let out a nervous laugh. "The audacity …"

"I know! How dare he think I've got some STD?!"

Sanji blinked.

"What? Did I say something wrong?"

Sanji blinked again. "No," he said finally. "But … _that's_ what you're focusing on?"

Zoro stared at him strangely. "Was there something else I should've been focusing on?"

"Well, I mean …" Sanji rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't know …"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "If I'm not clean, I don't know what I am," Zoro said. "I haven't done it in so long, unless there's some incubus or something fucking me in my sleep." He paused, looking at Sanji out of the corner of his eye before his brow furrowed in concern. "Did you … Did you think I was talking about …" He trailed off.

"No," Sanji muttered, turning his head away.

"Sanji."

Zoro's voice was soft, standing in front of the blond. He was holding him by his shoulders, letting his fingers trace random patterns over his shoulder-blades. He leaned closer, whispering in Sanji's ear. "Did I ever tell you how fuckable you look in my shirt?"

Sanji's breath hitched as Zoro licked his ear, taking his earlobe into his mouth before letting it go. Sanji didn't have an ear fetish, not at all, but the only sound he seemed to be able to hear in the entire room was the sound of their combined breathing and the soft swaying sound Zoro's three hoops seemed to make. Oh fuck, he was starting to get hard, wasn't he?

"N-no," Sanji said in a soft voice.

"I could just fuck you right now," Zoro said, "you've got me so hard. Do you know what you do to me, Sanji?" he asked, his hot breath sending shivers down Sanji's spine. His chest tightened as Zoro whispered dirty words to him and he realized maybe Zoro had a kink for dirty talk, and maybe Sanji had it too. "My cock's so hard right now for you …" He pressed his body a little harder against him. "Can you feel it?"

Sanji hissed, the friction making his head spin. "Fuck," he gasped, feeling his breathing increase.

"Sounds good to me," Zoro whispered, moving from Sanji's ear to his neck, licking gently at the skin, sucking slightly. "Number eleven, do you remember it?"

"Skin," Sanji muttered. "You l-like my skin."

"No, you're wrong," Zoro told him softly. "I _love_ your skin."

Zoro pushed against Sanji and the two backed up until the back of Sanji's knees hit the sofa and he fell into a sitting position. Zoro fell to his knees and ran his lips up and down the valley of Sanji's neck, making the blond moan, trying to keep himself quiet, but it was getting harder the more Zoro sucked, his hands moving from Sanji's neck lower into the dip of the too big shirt.

Sanji let out a gasp, gripping Zoro's hair tightly. "Z-Zoro," he choked out in a raspy voice.

"Twenty-three," Zoro muttered.

"My voice …"

"Thirty-four," Zoro said.

"T-there— ha! Oh fuck! T-there isn't a thirty-fourth," Sanji tried to speak when Zoro bit him, nibbling on his neck.

"There is now," Zoro said. "The way you say my name. Number nineteen, do you remember it?" he asked as his other hand went underneath the shirt and gently ran over Sanji's stomach. Sanji sucked in a breath, but when Zoro bit his collarbone, he let out a sigh, forcing himself to release his intake of breath. "Do you remember?" he repeated.

"My … my sensitivity."

Sanji pulled at Zoro's hair, trying to detach him from his neck. He brought the Marimo to face him, pressing his lips against his. Perhaps it was the teasing, the wait that made him feel this high, this needy as he pulled the swordsman closer to him. Leaning down to meet Zoro who stayed on his knees, kissing him back with as much ferocity as ever.

For some reason, this kiss, it felt like it was more intimate than the act of sex would be. Zoro was pouring everything into it, he could practically feel his emotions as he pulled at Sanji's hair gently, as though trying to mould them together. Passion, want, desire and … there was something Sanji couldn't name, couldn't name because he had never felt it before.

Zoro's hand wandered further up Sanji's chest underneath the shirt, the fabric bunching up the more Zoro went. As he kissed Sanji, his hand seemed to explore Sanji's body, trying to memorize it. Sanji let out a moan into the swordsman's mouth when his breath suddenly hitched.

Zoro pinched his nipple lightly. It hardened even more as he let his thumb brush over it slowly, ghosting over it. "Sensitive indeed," he mumbled.

Sanji's back seemed to arch as Zoro left his lips to go to his neck again. "Number thirty-five; your neck. God …"

Sanji was having trouble breathing, the way Zoro was sucking on his neck, surely there'd be a hickey. He'd be marked … Marked as Zoro's. He hated people who were overly-possessive, but he wouldn't mind all that much if Zoro owned him. Not if he could own Zoro too. His breathing quickened, his chest tightening.

Zoro froze. "Sanji," he said, pulling away, his hand slowly falling from Sanji's chest, "Sanji, can you breathe?" he asked softly.

"Ahou, why couldn't I?" Sanji asked. He wanted Zoro's touch back, he wanted the heat. He hated feeling this needy, but his head was spinning and the world seemed unsteady and he needed Zoro to stabilize himself. He needed Zoro to touch him, to feel his callused, rough swordsman hands on him …

Zoro took Sanji's chin in his hand and made him look at him. "Sanji, copy me, okay?"

Sanji was confused, his lungs constricting as Zoro slowly breathed in through his nose and held it for a few seconds before breathing out through his mouth. "Sanji, your gaze is getting glassy, look at me," he said. "Focus on me, just me."

Sanji did and slowly, he began to copy him. He wasn't sure why, but there was something calming about matching his breaths with Zoro's, inhaling as Zoro inhaled, exhaling as Zoro did. It was at that moment that he heard it. The sound that made Zoro get that worried crease in his forehead. Sanji's breath … it was coming out like a wheeze.

He froze the moment he realized it and his throat seemed to choke up on him. "W-what's …" He trailed off and coughed.

"Don't talk," Zoro said, "Don't talk," he repeated. "I'm going to ask you question and you're going to nod or shake your head. Does your chest hurt?"

"A little—"

Zoro covered his mouth with his hand and shook his head. "Don't talk," he said again. "Shake your head or nod. Does your chest hurt?"

Sanji nodded.

"Breathe for me," Zoro said. "Just take a deep breath."

Sanji wanted to ask since when was Zoro a doctor, but did as he was told, taking a deep breath and then letting it out.

"Does your chest still hurt?"

It hurt less, not as much. He could ignore it completely. He shook his head.

"Good …" Zoro stood up and pulled Sanji up as well. "Get dressed, I'm going to take you out."

"Partys?"

"No," Zoro shook his head. "Nah, not now. How about we go see a movie? Is there anything you want to see right now?"

"Depends. Am I allowed to talk?" Sanji shot back. The pain was gone, he could breathe again. Why Zoro was making such a big deal out of it was beyond him.

"Yeah, sure," said Zoro distractedly. "What do you want to see?"

" _Rurouni Kenshin,_ there's the last movie out," Sanji said.

"Okay," Zoro agreed. "Get dressed, I'll check the papers for the times."

Sanji nodded. He was about to leave to change, as Zoro requested, when he paused. "Are you okay?" he asked Zoro.

"Fine," Zoro replied. But he wouldn't look at him.

* * *

"Two for _Rurouni Kensin: The Legend Ends_ ," said Zoro to the woman behind the counter. "You want popcorn?" he asked Sanji.

"Sure."

"Anything on it?"

"Butter," Sanji decided, taking out a cigarette.

"Excuse me sir," said the woman at the counter, "smoking isn't allowed here."

Sanji sighed and put out his cigarette with a sigh. "Whatever."

"I'll get us one big one, okay?" Zoro asked.

"If you eat it all during the trailers, I'm kicking your ass," Sanji warned.

Zoro smirked. "Wouldn't dream of it."

"Theatre five," the woman said, handing Zoro two tickets. "Please enjoy the movie."

Zoro turned to Sanji. "We have fifteen minutes before it starts. You wanna go in first?"

"Nah," Sanji said. "I think I'm going to go outside. I need a smoke."

"They're cancer sticks you know," Zoro said with a sigh. "Fine. Just don't be late."

"Good luck finding the room, Marimo," Sanji teased.

With that, he left the cinema to stand outside. He lit up another cigar, smiling to himself as he stared at the engraving from Zoro. He slipped it back into his pocket before putting the cigarette to his lips.

Inhaling slowly, Sanji let it fill him when he stopped. He pulled the cigarette out and coughing into his sleeve. Was it allergies? It was that time of year after all. He hadn't coughed on a cigarette since maybe a month after he started. He tuned the cigarette over in between his fingers. It was still cold, snow was still on the ground, but nothing new seemed to be going to fall any time soon. It was cold enough to see his breath and it was around March, Sanji found, that you could really watch the seasons change.

He hadn't people watched in a while, he realized, watching as a man and his daughter entered the theatre, hand in hand. There was a couple approaching the entrance, their hands swinging between each other, the boy blushing from the cold or the close proximity to his girlfriend, Sanji didn't know.

He brought the cigarette back to his lips and sucked in a breath. It irritated his throat, he found.

 _Strange. Has it ever done that before?_

It scratched at his esophagus, burned a little, nothing he wasn't used to, but the urge to cough again rose up in his throat. He pushed it down, causing him to let out a few choking sounds. Whatever, it wasn't like it was all that important. Maybe the cigarette was old, it was a pretty ancient pack … He shrugged and put away his cigars, reentering the cinema.

The first thing he spotted was a tall green-haired man looking both left and right, holding a large bag of popcorn and two sodas.

Sanji rolled his eyes and approached him. "Come on, we'll be late."

"It's not my fault theatre five is hidden," Zoro muttered under his breath.

Sanji decided not to mention that each theatre had their number written over their doors in neon lights. "It's upstairs," he said, rolling his eyes. "Come on, Marimo."

It was the first time Sanji could say he didn't feel a shred of embarrassment as he pulled Zoro by his hand up the stairs. There were some people staring at them, but Sanji gave them no notice, the only thing he was focused on was how good it felt to have Zoro grip his hand even tighter, even if it made him look like a lost kid on a school trip.

They entered the theatre and fell into seats in the back.

"You know, this is where people who want to mess around sit," Zoro whispered in Sanji's ear as the lights dimmed and the trailers began.

"Oh really?" Sanji asked with a smirk.

Zoro gently nibbled at his ear. He could see the smirk, even in the darkness. "Want to?"

"To what? Mess around?" Sanji asked in a teasing voice.

"Amongst other things …"

"You're such a pervert," he accused, but he couldn't help smiling.

"Sanji …"

There was that tone again. The one that made Sanji feel as though Zoro was about to tell him something really important. Something that could alter the course of their relationship completely.

Sanji sucked in a breath, waiting.

 _Could he …?_

"I …" Zoro was silent for a moment. "I wanted to tell you that …"

 _Don't rush him, it's not his fault he's so slow at this. Calm down, fuck, Sanji, it might not be what you think._

"Yes?" Sanji pressed anyway, feeling his heart race.

"See, I really want you to know that I …" He could imagine Zoro biting his lip slowly, licking his lips. "Ai-aish—"

"The movie's starting," someone in front of them hissed, silencing both Zoro and Sanji.

Sanji really wanted to kick the guy in the head. He waited for a moment before whispering, "What was it?"

"Nothing," Zoro said quietly. "It wasn't important."

Correction: Sanji really wanted to _kill_ the guy in front of him. A kick would never suffice.

* * *

"So?"

"So what?" Zoro asked.

Sanji stared at the swordsman expectantly. They were at Luffy's now. The straw hat had decided that since it was Sanji's birthday, they ought to throw a party. He was pretty sure that Luffy just wanted to eat more cake, but whatever. Nami, Usopp and Luffy had each given him a gift, sort of rushed, but much appreciated. Zoro on the other hand, had known about his birthday for a while. Surely he had gotten him something, right?

"My present?" Sanji pressed.

"God you're so needy," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "I'll go get it."

Zoro got up and left in search of his gift when Nami slid into the seat Zoro had just occupied. "So?"

"So what?"

"Zoro's glowing," Nami said. "It's a sex glow and now that I look at you a little closer, you have perfect skin."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Moisturizer," he told her. "Works wonders." He shook his head. "Whatever you're thinking, you're wrong. I haven't slept with him, he hasn't slept with me, there has been no sex."

Nami sighed and crossed her arms. "You're no fun!"

Zoro came back and gave Nami a look. "Move away," he told her.

"Possessive much?" she teased.

"I know my boyfriend's hot, but you've already got one," Zoro said.

"Aw, but Zoro—"

"Move. _Now_."

Nami moved, a stupid grin on her face all the while.

Zoro placed the bag in front of Sanji. "I can't wrap things, as you know so I kinda just …" He trailed off.

"Shoved it into a bag with tissue paper and hoped for the best?" Sanji finished.

"The damn woman at the store did it, okay? She said I wasn't doing it right anyway. All you need to do is stuff the shit inside, right? But apparently that's worng so …" He blushed. "Look, just open it, okay?"

Sanji grinned.

Reaching into the bag, he held onto a thick … book? He slowly pulled the volume out and immediately, his eyes widened. "This is …"

"A fucking fortune, I know," Zoro muttered. "You better be damned grateful, Curly Brow," Zoro told him.

In Sanji's lap was a giant book. _The Complete Works of William Shakespeare._

"Oh my God, Zoro, how did you find this?" Sanji asked, staring at it open mouthed.

"I knew you told me once you had memorized all of his stuff, but I mean, doesn't hurt to have it, right?" Zoro asked, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly.

"I can't believe you did this Zoro," said Nami. She frowned. "I'm expecting an amazing birthday present this year, Roronoa."

Sanji smiled. "I love it," he declared. "Thank you Zoro, thank you so much!" He wrapped his arms around the swordsman, pulling him closer into a tight hug before pulling back and giving him a quick kiss. "You're fucking amazing Zoro, did you know that?"

"Nope, but it's good to know," he said with a grin, giving Sanji a quick kiss.

The party went on, cake was eaten, sake was given out (Zoro refused it) and Sanji smoked a few more cigars. Of course, doing so each time he had to hold in his urge to resist coughing and he couldn't figure out why that was. He was standing outside with a newly lit cigarette in hand when Zoro found him. He didn't want the others to know that for some reason, smoking was becoming harder for him.

"Hey," said Zoro in a soft voice.

"Hey," Sanji replied in an equally soft voice.

"Um, about today …" Zoro bit his bottom lip. "There's been something I've wanted to tell you … but I haven't exactly gotten the chance to …" He trailed off and coughed into his hand. "It's cold here, isn't it?" he asked, letting out a light laugh.

"You're stalling, aren't you?"

Zoro ran his fingers through his hair. "That obvious?"

"Kinda." Sanji inhaled slowly. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you're acting like a virgin," he teased. "So why couldn't we go to Partys? I'm sure Makino would've loved for us to use the actual bar seeing as its called Partys _Bar_ , wouldn't she?" he asked. "What, is it only good for fights?"

"Um, didn't think of that to be honest," Zoro admitted, blushing deeply.

"And how could you get lost in a movie theatre? It wasn't all that big you know," he said, rolling his eyes. Dusting off a speck on his pants, Sanji watched the smoke swirl around him. "Oh yeah, I left your shirt in your room—"

"You can keep it," Zoro said. "It's fine. Besides, we live together, we can just swap clothes."

"Not with the way your clothes fit me," Sanji said. "Though you should wear dress shirts more often," he mused aloud. "You were fucking sexy on Valentine's …"

"Oh really?" Zoro's voice raised an octave.

"Are you nervous?" Sanji asked curiously, raising an eyebrow at him.

"I thought we weren't playing that game," Zoro said.

"You didn't answer the question," Sanji reminded him. Are you nervous?"

"A little," Zoro admitted.

"Why?"

Zoro blushed. "Why aren't _you_ nervous?"

Sanji pondered this. He supposed he should be, considering his relationship with the man and how he had felt prepared to ask Zoro to fuck him that morning. He felt strangely at ease. "I dunno, perhaps I'm just used to you by now." He shrugged. "Could be because I trust you. Could be a lot of things really, why do you—"

" _Je t'aime._ "

"—ask …" Sanji trailed off. "You're speaking French again Marimo, I can't understand you."

"A-aishiteru."

Now _that_ , Sanji understood.

He could feel his chest tightening again, his lungs refusing to function. He tried to breathe, but instead all that came out was a whistling sound. He tried to suck in air, but it felt as though his wind-pipe was blocked, like he couldn't get air, like something was trying to stop him. He started to panic. The cigar slipped out of his hand, hitting the porch and burning the wood. His hands began to clam, his face began to heat for a reason that didn't seem to be a blush. He felt like he was suffocating.

"Sanji?" Zoro asked, "Sanji, can you hear me?"

It was like there was white noise everywhere, spots of white, he couldn't see properly. The world was spinning, his chest kept tightening as though trying to knot itself up, his lungs felt like they were filled with water. There was pressure, so much pressure, he wasn't sure what was going on around him. He stumbled forward, grabbing onto Zoro, who held onto him tightly.

"Sanji," Zoro said, his voice raising slightly in panic. "Sanji, look at me!"

Sanji's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he saw black.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _fangal4life : Seriously? You have NO IDEA how worried I was that I totally screwed them up, writing each chapter gets harder the more their relationship develops. I remember reading this story where the plot was pretty standard and stuff, but then I got really pissed when the two main characters got into a relationship cause the girl just totally ditched her best friend cause she didn't like her new boyfriend and her boyfriend was like, "I think you should really talk to her" and she was like, "Fuck no, she's wrong! You're amazing, I don't care about her anymore!" God, idiots sometimes, eh? Zoro seriously does remind me of a ballerina though sometimes, he's very graceful, you know, when he's not bleeding profusely and all._

 _Shizuka Taiyou : Yeah uh, sorry, this chapter was planned in advance to be this way but I will do a chapter where there is an anime marathon. I just can't figure out where yet... I meant to call it a PVR, I don't think there's much of a difference between DVR and PVR. My TV calls it a PVR so I wrote PVR._

 _Dyloa : Okay I am so sorry! If I offended you and your chocolate, I'm sorry! Let me explain myself, even if it doesn't excuse me. First of all, saying that it had alcohol in it was a reference to **Junjou Romantica** because at one point, this girl gives this guy chocolate and his boyfriend gets jealous and eats them all and there was alcohol in it so he got drunk by accident. It was Belgian chocolate so that's why I said that. Also, Sanji enjoys swearing and I, like Zoro, am not a big fan of chocolate so I've never had more then like a millimetre by millimetre cube off of a chocolate cake which I then spat out. Anyway, lastly, the internet said that that form brand of chocolate was the most expensive kind so I wanted Zoro to spend a lot of money. I watched **Friends** recently, in which this guy get felt up by a tailor while doing the seam so originally, the tailor wasn't a pervert and then I saw the episode and he became one! Tada! And God was summing up the chapter by Zoro's rushed and hurried speech (which, according to my word count on Pages is over 500 words long) fun!_

 _Random Person: I don't know Latin, I had to translate what you said, sorry! But I do know French. But I suck at writing it ... Anyway, moving on, the word I put into google was "yield", but yeah, he surrendered while speaking in Latin. I don't think he'll speak it often, especially considering I know nothing about the language and feel guilty about screwing up the Japanese language with my random inputs of "baka" and "ahou". I'm female, just so you know. And thank you! It really means a lot to me._

 _mandacub : Okay, would you kill me if I said the original first sex scene was going to be chapter 28? But then I realized that the format I had there left out so many things, like Sanji's birthday, Zoro's birthday, Christmas and a bunch of other things and I was like, "uh, Sanji was raped ... um, not going to jump into bed all that quick, eh?" And I wanted more time to cause more sexual tension. I've never written sexual tension between two boys, but I hope I did it well. I like to tease. Don't worry though, it IS coming. And you should review more, I wouldn't mind hearing from you! I always like when I learn someone else is reading my story!_

 _lilcutieprincess : Well yeah, it is, turns out. I swear I wasn't trying to make it that long. I considered making the count-down a short amount of time that wasn't a week and then I was like, I can skip days. In the end, I only skipped one day ... I'm glad you liked it though, I really enjoyed writing it. Especially Sanji's reaction to Zoro's long speech. I was like, "he has to do something that'll totally surprise him, he can't maul him in the restaurant, they'll probably get kicked out ... Hmmmm... What if he's just silent and then just totally attacks him?" And then the long speech he gave him about what to do for the next Valentine's Day was something I was like, "should he respond to his long speech in the restaurant or in the car?" And I thought about having them make-out and have them hit the horn of the car, but then I was like, "no, Sanji would make Zoro get into the passenger seat and Zoro isn't flexible enough to get himself over the arm rest, but he is pretty flexible."_

 _VampireKoiBite : Yup, **Junjou Romantica**! Yay! I love it so much, you have no idea! I totally blew off talking to my friend when I was like, "OH MY GOD! SEASON 3! THERE'S ENGLISH SUBS!" and she was like, "YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!" And then I gave her this long rant about what it was about and I feel really stupid cause I hadn't seen it in forever and when I was talking about Miyagi and Shinobu I called Miyagi Miyugi and I was like, "dammit, so close!" and I totally forgot how big that age gap was! I was like, talking about how the author likes age gaps and said that Shinobu had one that was bigger than Nowaki and Hiroki's, but smaller than Usagi and Misaki. I WAS TOTALLY WRONG!_

 _Marimohead : Thank you! I seriously suck at romantic stuff so this is probably how I'd screw up my relationship on Valentine's Day._

 _Ayamichan34 : Nice songs. I don't listen to much of Beyonce but I do like Evanescenece (if i could just spell it)._

 _Alright the people at the shop: they were Yukina Kou and Kisa Shouta (God I love how his name is Shouta) from **Sekai Ichi Hatsukoi,** also written by the author of **Junjou Romantica.** I love this couple, I swear to God. Kisa looks young, like 18, but he's actually 30! He's too cute for 30 though, it's not fair! Like Yukina said, "isn't there a limit to how young you can look?!" But that aside, I laughed so hard when I realized that the place Yukina worked was called Marimo Books. MARIMO. God I'm pissed **Sekai Ichi Hatsukoi** didn't get another season._

 _Now I have a question for you (besides the fact that you're disappointed because the chapter is so much shorter because I write REALLY long author notes and stuff), I do want to write an anime marathon chapter so here's my question: **what animes do you want Zoro to react to? It doesn't matter if he's already reacted to them before, just tell me the names and I'll put them in!**_


	31. Try To Quit

_**Author's Note** : Okay first of all, I watched **The Breakfast Club** recently and that is the reason for the marks Sanji has, even if they were never mentioned before. I felt so bad for that poor nerd, I mean everyone else got a girl and he's just there writing a paper. And he was the suicidal one! I totally over-analyzed the movie, but that aside ... Sanji talks about a voice in his head. If you haven't read **Strong** , it's the encounter of how he got that burn mark of his and it's basically how Sanji used to experience the voice. I'm kinda still in shock. Over 200 thousand words and 200 reviews ... I really didn't think this story would be this successful. This story has officially beat out all of my others with the most reviews, favourites and follows. I don't own **One Piece,** this chapter is short, chapter 32 is written, chapter 33 is giving me hell. I will be honest, my mother was a nurse for a certain amount of time but I know nothing about hospitals. My brother smoked but he stopped about six years ago, I don't know what it's like to stop smoking, or to start since I like to think of my body as free of contaminants ... Moving onwards, with that said, everything that's in this story is based off of assumptions. I did some research on Sanji's condition, despite the fact that I sort of have it (only when I have a really bad cold, it kinda comes back) and tried my best at this portrayl. Sorry this chapter is also short. Chapter 32 is really long though! Oh yeah and HAPPY BIRTHDAY PERCY JACKSON! (Yup, I read and watch EVERYTHING.)_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of past self-harm**

* * *

Chapter 31: Try To Quit

* * *

Sitting in the white waiting room of the hospital was pure torture. The walls were white, the chairs were uncomfortable and the fucking nurse wouldn't let Zoro into the fucking room.

He remembered teasing Sanji about how, with the way he was smoking, he'd end up in the hospital bed next. Fuck, he really wanted to take those words back. Had he jinxed it? Zoro wasn't superstitious, but still … God he felt restless and horrible, this was going to drive him absolutely insane.

The nurse came out of the room and instantly, Zoro jumped out of his chair. "Can I see him?"

"He says he has no last name," said the nurse with a puzzled expression on her face. "And he doesn't seem to have his medicare card or anything of that sort either. Who is he?"

"Can I see him?" Zoro repeated.

Her expression hardened. Whatever Sanji said about women being beautiful was bullshit to Zoro, all he wanted to do was see him and now this fucking hag was in his way. "What's your relation to him?"

"I'm his boyfriend."

The woman's nose crinkled.

 _Oh. So she's one of those._

"Only those who are family of the patient can—"

"He has no fucking family," Zoro snapped. "No blood relative and his guardian is off who knows where, probably at some chef conference in Germany or some shit like that!"

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to calm down—"

"I will not fucking calm down!" Zoro screamed. He pinched the bridge of his nose, realizing that yelling wouldn't get him anywhere with this woman. "Look, I just want to see him. Can't you let me do that? Is his condition serious? Does he need medication? What is going on?!"

"Sir, I know you're upset, but I'm going to need you to be level-headed about this," the nurse said slowly. "We can't have you frantically causing the patient to go through more stress, he seems to be acting strangely as it is." She shook her head. "We've run a diagnosis already,—"

"Then what is it?" Zoro asked. "What's going on? Is it lethal? Is he going to die?"

"It's nothing like that, but we prefer for the patients themselves to tell their family— or I suppose, in your case … significant others …" The way she said it was as though each word was poison. She looked Zoro up and down and shook her head. "In any case, it's better for the patient to inform whomever they choose about their condition, they prefer the decision to tell others than them being informed without their knowledge."

"Can I see him?" Zoro asked. This woman was making him panic. He was expecting the worse, he was expecting to find Sanji on his death bed. He needed to talk to him, or else his heart might leap out of his throat. "I just … I _need_ to see him."

The woman's mouth was set in a firm line. "Okay. But, before I let you see him, I have a question for you."

"What?" Zoro was ready to answer anything, if they'd let him see him.

"He's a smoker, isn't he?" she asked. "There was a cigarette near him and his voice sounds a little hoarse. He said it's natural."

"He's a chain-smoker, yeah, why?" Zoro asked distractedly.

"How long has he been smoking?"

Zoro didn't understand how this was important, but he tried to remember that night when Sanji had sat down with him and spoke about his past. He was thirteen when he started, right? "Ten years? Around?"

She nodded and bit her lip, looking the slightest bit worried. What did that mean? Was she worried because Sanji had been smoking for so long? That he had started so young? Or was this something else entirely?

The woman nodded once more before opening the door. "You may enter."

Zoro said nothing and entered the room. It was familiar, all wards in the hospital looked the same. He turned around to thank her, but she had shut the door and was walking off down the hall.

Zoro turned back around and walked to the foot of Sanji's bed. The cook looked pale. Paler than usual. He was lying in a hospital robe with a frown on his face. One of his hands were tapping on the silver rail on the side of the bed that kept patient from falling over and the other swept across his gown, over and over, in a motion that looked familiar to Zoro. He was trying to reach for his pack of cigarettes but they weren't there. The gown had no pockets so it almost looked like he was dusting off non-existent dirt.

There was silence before Zoro cleared his throat, but Sanji beat him to it.

"Fucking bastards took my pack," was all the blond said.

"So …" Zoro rocked on his heels. He didn't know what to tell him, what he should say so instead, he said nothing. He was pretty sure Sanji didn't even know what he had said, hadn't heard him considering the way he had promptly passed out almost immediately afterwards.

"What happened?" asked Sanji. "After I passed out, I mean."

Zoro bit his lip. "I … well I started yelling …"

* * *

 _Zoro's voice was caught in this throat, unable to speak. He couldn't find words, the only thing going through his head at the moment was to splash water in Sanji's face and have him look him in the eyes again, properly. He didn't care about an answer to his confession, he didn't want one, he just wanted Sanji to open his eyes again._

 _"Sanji," he choked out, feeling his body limp in his arms. Fuck, what did this mean? He was having a serious panic attack. His words got jumbled, he tried to yell for help, but instead he ended up choking. He gripped the cook tightly and leaned him against the porch railing. He gently hit him across the face, tapping more than anything. "Sanji, Sanji," he said in a soft voice, trying to keep the panic out of his tone. "Sanji, can you hear me?"_

 _Of course he couldn't fucking hear him, his eyes had rolled into the back of his head and his face looked blue! He could see Sanji's chest rising and falling, but it was slow, he was struggling. Fuck, he knew something was wrong this morning!_

 _"Nami! Luffy! Usopp! Call an ambulance!" he yelled. He didn't want to shake Sanji too hard, for fear of hurting him and he knew that if he tried CPR, he would fail horribly at it. He didn't know what to do, so instead he just stayed there, on his knees in front of the passed out Sanji, holding his hand tightly._

 _Nami rushed onto the porch, obviously having heard the urgency in Zoro's voice and took one look at Sanji before taking out her cell phone._

 _She began to talk to an operator while Luffy and Usopp ran onto the porch as well. Luffy dropped down to his knees next to Zoro."What happened?" he asked, "what's going on?"_

 _"I don't know," Zoro said, feeling the urge to cry. It wasn't even because he was sad, it was because he was frustrated. That Sanji had just collapsed without any warning, without any indication and he couldn't keep a calm head, he was just panicking and there was nothing he could do … "Fuck, Nami, we need an ambulance!"_

 _"I know!" she screamed at him, hurriedly speaking to the operator._

 _Usopp was freaking out as well, but he was able to show his mental break down. He was mumbling to himself, pacing, screaming, pulling out his hair. Zoro felt as though it were his duty to remain calm, but his heart was racing a thousand miles per minute and he felt the sudden and undeniable urge to puke. He wasn't sure how long he could deal with this, how long he'd be able to look at Sanji this way._

 _Was this what it was like for Sanji? To see Zoro unconscious, to feel as though his heart was being squeezed tightly, trying to kill him from the inside out? Was this what it was like to see the one you loved in so much pain?_

 _He raised a hand to Sanji's cheek. He was cold. Fuck, he was freezing. He tried to breathe, but he found he was having trouble. He was panting, breathing too quickly, sucking in more air before he was finished. It was taking all he had not to cry, not to shed a tear but by God did he want to._

 _It was ten minutes before the ambulance arrived and it seemed as though Sanji had stopped breathing entirely._

 _They let Zoro ride with him in the ambulance and hooked Sanji up to a machine that helped him breathe. The entire time he sat there holding Sanji's hand tightly, wondering what on Earth had happened, trying not to freak out. He highly doubted that'd be good for Sanji, should he wake up in the middle of the ride to the hospital._

 _He never did._

 _When they got there, Zoro was rushed out of the ambulance and Sanji was forced into several testing rooms. He was asked numerous questions, what was the patient's name, did he have proper health insurance, was he healthy before hand? How old was he, how long had he been acting like this, was there anything he did in his daily life that may trigger such a reaction?_

 _And then after about an hour of questioning, Zoro was put in the waiting room with his leg tapping against the floor constantly, trying to get himself under control until that damn nurse came by._

* * *

"And uh yeah, that's how I'm here," Zoro said slowly.

"How long was I out for? The nurse wouldn't tell me. I woke up maybe an hour ago," Sanji said.

"About …" Zoro counted in his head. "You've been out for nearly nine hours. It's March 2nd still, but it's nearly midnight."

"Were you … you were here the whole time?" Sanji asked in a quiet voice.

"Yeah …"

"What about Usopp? Luffy? Nami?"

"The ambulance said that only one person was allowed to ride with the patient and they all said I should go, since I've known you the longest …" Zoro turned his head away. He could still see Sanji's fingers tapping and reaching for a smoke, even from the corner of his eye. He was _literally_ going through the motions.

"Do you know what I have?"

Zoro shook his head. "The nurse said it was up to you to tell me … But you don't … you don't have cancer, do you?" Zoro asked. "I mean I know those cigarettes are cancer sticks but really when I said you'd go to an early grave, I was joking! I don't want … I'd never want …"

Sanji laughed lightly, but it sounded a tad strained. "No, I don't have cancer," he said, rollin his eyes. "You really do imagine the worse case scenario, don't you, Marimo?"

Zoro played with his fingers, fiddling his thumbs and cracking his knuckles.

Sanji stared at his hands as he popped an air bubble in his right index finger. "That'll give you arthritis you know," he said.

"Myth," Zoro answered. "It's just very annoying."

"That it is," Sanji said. "That it is."

"You know, the longer you delay telling me, the worse things I'm going to think. Now I'm wondering if you have pneumonia or leukaemia or if you're anemic, or if you've discovered you have diabetes and you neglected to tell me, or that you're one of those hopeless cases who only have six months to live—"

"Asthma."

Zoro blinked. "Asthma?"

"Yeah."

Zoro smiled. "Oh thank God!" He let out a light nervous chuckle. "I totally thought you were going to die, you scared the shit out of me," he said. "You can't do that to me anymore, you can't, you realize that? I nearly died, nearly had a heart attack. I'm twenty-three, I can't have heart attacks at this age!"

Sanji shook his head. "I don't know, they're giving me an inhaler, I'm being told specifically not to smoke …" Sanji's eye twitched a little at that. "I have to avoid all possible triggers … They took away my fucking pack Zoro!" he screamed. "I'm going to go insane! I've never gone this long without a smoke, not unless I was sleeping!"

"Hey," Zoro said, reaching over the bed and taking Sanji's hand that was on the rail, stopping it from tapping. "You went thirteen years without it, you can go another thirteen. And thirteen after that because then I know you won't be smoking, which means you'll have at least twenty-six years afterwards to survive and live, and maybe another twenty-six afterwards."

"Ahou, then I'd be somewhere around a hundred years old," Sanji snapped. "And it was easy those first thirteen years because I didn't know it existed!" He shook his head.

"You became reliant on them, right? To calm yourself down," Zoro said. "Because of _them_." He didn't say their names, didn't mention them with actual nouns. Instead, he held on tightly as Sanji squeezed his hand. "That threat's gone, you know it. You don't need it to relieve yourself of that pressure, the pressure's gone. Maybe the addiction's still there, but we can work around it. Sanji, you're going to get through this. I don't think something as small as asthma's going to beat you."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Easy for you to say!"

"Okay," Zoro said, letting go of Sanji's hand. "How about I propose a deal with you?"

Sanji stared at him. "What kind of deal?"

"If you stop smoking," Zoro said slowly, "say, we start small and say you go a day without cigarettes, then I'll touch you. I'll kiss you, I'll let you kiss me, I'll let you touch me. Sound fair?"

"Why can't I just do it now?" Sanji asked, reaching for Zoro's hand but Zoro pulled back. He didn't want to, but he did, ignoring the slightly hurt look in Sanji's eyes.

"Because then you have no motivation," Zoro replied. "You want it, don't you?" he asked. "You want me to touch you, right?"

Zoro felt his heart stop in his chest. He knew he craved Sanji's touch, he wanted to feel the man against him, feel his soft skin, taste his lips. But still, it left him wondering, _did_ Sanji want it? Most of the time, if not all of the time, Zoro initiated all of their kisses, all of their touches. What if Sanji was just responding to him because he felt bad for him? His breath caught in his throat as he waited for an answer from the blond, trying not to show his nervousness.

Sanji bit his bottom lip and looked away from Zoro.

Zoro felt himself deflate, ready to get up, tell Sanji in a tight voice that he'd get his coat and go and leave before the sweetest cake he had ever tasted came back up his throat when Sanji spoke.

"Maybe," he whispered quietly.

"Maybe?" Zoro repeated. Maybe wasn't a yes, but he could work with maybe. Maybe meant there was a possibility, a possibility he could get Sanji as addicted to his kisses as he was to his.

Sanji's cheeks were flushing red. "Well I mean … Marimo …" He trailed off and Zoro realized he wasn't done talking. "I … I wouldn't kiss you back if I hated it …" He seemed to be turning even redder with each word. "And I mean … I wouldn't … I wouldn't have even thought of doing _that_ if you repulsed me …"

Was Sanji talking about sex? No, that couldn't be it. The blond wasn't ready for something like that yet. Then … wait, did he mean that "gift" of his to Zoro?

Zoro's brain tried to process everything before he anxiously said, "So … do we have a deal?"

"And if I don't make the deal?" Sanji asked, the red on his cheeks slowly dimming.

"Then … well then you'll just continue to give me heart attacks like that and I'll have to drag you to the hospital when you get a serious attack like that," Zoro said with a shrug. "Course, I'd prefer if that wouldn't be the case …"

Sanji nodded slowly. "Okay … deal."

* * *

It was perhaps the next morning that Zoro regretted what he had told Sanji.

He was on his way to the hospital, thanks to Sanji's Christmas gift of a GPS, though of course, it wasn't his fault that left and right were apparently the exact opposite of what he had thought. It was when going through traffic that he realized that Sanji wasn't limited to Zoro. Of course, Zoro didn't hang out with many people at all, his line of work made it so that there were either friends or enemies, no real acquaintances since he never truly bothered to go anywhere besides his apartment, Luffy's house and Partys. This meant the likely hood of him finding someone who he wanted to mess around with was pretty fucking low. Sanji on the other hand …

Sanji was meant to be a social butterfly, it was obvious. The way he was so at ease around others whereas Zoro awkwardly walked around and spoke in a mixed jumble of words, it was clear he was an extrovert whereas Zoro was an introvert forced to interact with others because of the friends he had made who just loved being social. Too bad Zoro liked them too much to find more anti-social people. He would have no problem finding someone else to talk to in that big hospital, would probably make loads of friends. Zoro wasn't an idiot, Sanji was very attractive, hell, he was attractive enough to turn Zoro gay (if he had even been straight in the first place). Surely those in the hospital wouldn't neglect to notice that.

Sanji was bisexual, he had said it himself. He still liked the girls, still commented on Nami's beauty and on others with no visible shame. He had made friends with Moodie, who was older than him by at least six years and she had wanted to pursue a relationship with him. It was clear that he attracted women, as well as men, even if he wasn't trying.

Zoro gripped the steering wheel tighter and turned right when the GPS told him to. Wait, no, that had been left, hadn't it?

Visiting hours started at ten and it was now nine forty-five. Zoro still had some way to go before he was able to see Sanji and now he was worried out of his mind that some other person, some nice, smooth-talking, beautiful woman would get to him first. Perhaps the reason that nurse had been so upset wasn't because she was homophobic, but rather, upset that Sanji was tied down to a man.

Sanji … Sanji wouldn't cheat on him, would he?

He quickly made what he was pretty sure was an illegal U-turn and went back to the transit, taking the other right this time, the right right, and continued down the road.

He was worrying too much, right? Surely, Sanji was a good man, he was loyal, he could be faithful …

But then again, the cooks had done horrible things to him. It was a miracle Sanji was even with Zoro, considering he was part of the sex that had stolen one of Sanji's most treasured things. If anything, it would make sense if Sanji was turned off of men entirely. But he said he didn't hate it, right? But Sanji had also admitted he had never been in a relationship before, which meant that surely he wanted to experiment? He had originally considered himself to be heterosexual, which meant that women were the apple of his eye, but he had never done anything with a woman. Maybe he wanted to try it out, see if he liked it better than men …

Zoro gritted his teeth. He was freaking out over nothing, wasn't he?

He hadn't slept much the night before, knowing that they were keeping Sanji in the hospital for a few more days in order to make him go through therapy, something that had to do with helping him stop smoking.

 _Make him stop smoking …_

Maybe it wouldn't take him that long, it was twenty-four hours, surely Sanji could handle it? It would've been an extreme to say that he wanted Sanji to stop smoking for an extended period of time, like say, a week, a day wasn't too much to ask, right? Maybe Zoro wouldn't have to wait too long …

* * *

The moment Zoro stepped into the hospital room, he knew he'd have to wait.

Sanji was fiddling with his lighter, flicking it on and off, watching the flames. Zoro knew in that second that if Zoro were to hand him a pack of cigarettes, he'd light it up instantly. The blond was standing in front of the giant window of the room, leaning against it. He was in his usual clothes now, but he still seemed to be digging his hand in his pocket, still expecting a pack to be there.

"Morning."

Sanji jumped at Zoro's voice.

"Don't fucking do that," he told him with a scowl. "You caught me off guard," he complained. "Why're you here?"

"Why do you have a lighter?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow. Immediately, a horrible realization occurred to him. "Roll up your sleeves."

"What?" Sanji asked, staring at him in confusion. "No."

"You know when you refuse, that just makes me more certain something's wrong," Zoro pointed out.

Sanji sighed and rolled his eyes. "Look, I'm your boyfriend, can't you just trust me on this? I'm not getting high on anything, no heroin, no pointless crap like that." He rubbed his arm and Zoro's eyes followed the movement. "What?" he asked.

"Sanji, roll up your sleeves."

"I'm not doing anything!" Sanji repeated, "I'm telling you! It's nothing!"

"Sanji!"

Sanji sighed and rolled up his left sleeve. Aside from the occasional white scars near his wrist and a few burn marks from cooking, Zoro saw nothing strange. That was, until he saw about three circular dots on Sanji's forearm. He wasn't good at math or anything like that, but he frowned, trying to figure out what it was from. There were different kinds of burns, some he could guess form Sanji being too close to the oven, or spilling something. These three dots though were different. Wait, no, there were four.

"What are these from?" Zoro asked, pointing to them.

Sanji turned his head away.

"Sanji, what are these from?"

"Cigarettes," Sanji said in a soft voice.

"You fucking burnt yourself using your own cigarettes?" Zoro demanded. "I thought you smoked so you could ignore the pain, I thought it was so you could focus on something else. What the fuck were you doing, burning yourself with them?!"

"It was …" Sanji sighed. "I don't know, I didn't do it often …" He shrugged. "Sometimes ash would just fall, you know? And I don't know, I just … I didn't have anywhere to put out the cigarette and if I used my fingers then I'd have trouble holding things and—"

"So you drove the fucking cigarette into your arm?!"

"It … it seemed like a smart idea at the time. I've only ever done it a few times," Sanji said. "I was seventeen, okay? I haven't done it since. Besides … it's gone."

"Gone?" Zoro repeated. "What do you mean 'gone'? What's 'it'?"

Sanji shook his head. "You'll think I'm crazy …"

"I already think you're crazy, you've got nothing left to lose," Zoro told him. He wanted to hold him, to pull him close, but he had told him he wouldn't touch him until he had stopped. He could wait. He could survive a few days without his touch, or was he really that addicted to him?

"I …" Sanji sighed and leaned against the window frame, turning away from Zoro. "After a while at the Baratie, when the cooks started to call me names like ugly and fat and I don't know, overweight and shit like that, I … I started hearing this voice."

Zoro bit his bottom lip. "You know what they say Sanji, about hearing voices, don't you?"

"I know that," Sanji said and though his hand was in his pocket, Zoro could see it fist inside the material. "You think I didn't fucking know? It was just … it was kind of like having Patty and Carne right next to me twenty-four seven, telling me the same things over and over again, like a record on repeat. You're fat, it told me. You're ugly. You're too thin."

"It told you you were fat and too thin at the same time?"

"I don't fucking know, it was fucked up. I was fucked up …" Sanji trailed off. "Anyway, it kept on like that. It was like no matter what I did, I just wanted it to stop, I wanted it to go away and it just fucking wouldn't. I tried everything. I started to go on a diet for about six months, hoping it'd shut up about my stupid weight. It didn't work. I tried to clean myself up even better, probably the damn reason I own so many suits … It didn't work. It always found soothing to poke at me for and when it realized I was trying to counteract it, trying to fix myself … It started to talk about things I couldn't change. My hair, my eyes, my body figure, my legs, my arms, my posture, the way I spoke, the sound of my voice, the way I would walk … I considered plastic surgery just to get rid of it …"

"But Sanji—"

"I know it's stupid," Sanji cut him off. He took a deep breath before continuing. "Of course, it was never happy with me. That fucking voice just telling me all the things I did wrong, how others could do better, how Zeff would be ashamed … The only thing it seemed to like was when I was in pain, as if all my faults and all my short-comings could just disappear, leak out with the blood." He shook his head. "I'm sick, I'm fucking sick … A fucking bodiless voice seemed to talk to me and drove me to the brink of insanity, made me change myself, made me overly-self-conscious, made me second guess everything and even though I knew somewhere, somewhere in the back of my mind that another scar on my wrist would do me no good, that I was already scarred enough, it would convince me that yeah, I was too scarred. I was so scarred, I was beyond hope so what did another line matter in the grand scheme of things?"

"How … how long has it been there?" Zoro asked, scared to know the answer.

"How long?" Sanji repeated. "Years … fucking years it's been haunting me …" He shook his head, his hand diving for a smoke, but coming up blank. "It didn't stop when you took me in. In fact, I think it wanted me to turn against you. It tried to tell me everything you did was out of pity, it was all for the sake of charity …"

"That's not it, you know that Sanji—"

"Yeah, I know." His voice was quiet, taking on a softer tone. "It told me I was disgusting, throwing myself on you on Valentine's … That I was weak …" Sanji held up his hand. "Do you see that mark?" he asked. "The one on my thumb? I burnt myself by accident," he said. "When I was lighting a cigarette. I made that mark about two weeks ago. A few days after Valentine's. And that's the last one I've ever made. It's the last one I'm ever going to make." He turned to Zoro, tears in his eyes. "It's gone, that fucking voice is gone now. I'm not going to hurt myself Zoro, you don't have to worry. I … I won't do it."

Zoro bit his lip, feeling himself have the urge to pull Sanji in, to hug him tightly and not let him go. He stopped himself though.

Sanji mirrored Zoro's action, causing the green-haired man to let out a tortured groan. "Sanji, you're killing me here …"

Sanji looked at him with an emotion in his eyes that Zoro couldn't place, but it shook him entirely. "Zoro," he said softly, "I really want to kiss you right now."

Zoro felt his heart stop. Sanji was not helping his urge to give up on the deal and just hold him, just to touch him …

"Twenty-four hours," he said. "Twenty-four hours," he reminded him.

Sanji frowned. "Fuck, that's a long time."

"Depends on when you had your last smoke," Zoro pointed out.

Sanji gritted his teeth. "Fuck …" He turned his head away. "They're letting me out tomorrow you know. What is it with us and spending birthdays in the hospital?" he asked with a light laugh.

Zoro shrugged. "Dunno, but how about we go to the cafeteria? New day, new people. New ratings."

Sanji grinned.

* * *

"Does nicotine count?"

Zoro dropped his jacket on the couch, giving Sanji a strange look. They had just returned from the hospital and the entire drive there, Sanji had been silent. What was this about nicotine? "What are you talking about?"

"Does nicotine … if I have nicotine, does that count as smoking?"

"Depends on how you got it in your system," Zoro said.

Sanji rolled up his right sleeve and Zoro saw two small rectangular squares that were probably the same colour as skin, but as Sanji's was so pale, they stuck out like a sore thumb.

"What are those?"

"Nicotine patches," Sanji said. Zoro expected him to pull his sleeve back down, but he kept it up, rolled to his elbow, the patches on his forearm. "They're for people trying to quit smoking," he explained. "They made me go through therapy and gave me a couple of patches, told me it was kind of like smoking, you still got the nicotine in small doses, it's suppose to ease you off of it." He shook his head. "I think I'm going to run out of them in less than a week, but still …"

"When was the last time you smoked?"

"I'm asking you if nicotine counts," Sanji said. "Otherwise my answer changes."

"Patches don't count, when was the last time you smoked a cigarette?" Zoro asked hurriedly.

Sanji took a moment to think. "Over forty-eight hours," he replied.

That was all Zoro needed to wrap his arms around Sanji and pull him into a kiss.

The taste was still on Sanji's tongue, the nicotine, the spices. Bitter, not sweet. The fact that Sanji was showing Zoro his skin, showing his arm with all of its small imperfections without a second thought, it made Zoro hold onto him tighter, pull him even closer. He let his fingers trail down Sanji's cheek as he gently took Sanji's lower lip in between his own and sucked. Sanji gasped and Zoro entered his mouth, turning to stone remembering it wrapped around his cock.

"Fuck, Sanji," he gasped, moving from the cook's lips to his neck. "You should've told me sooner."

Sanji gripped Zoro's hair as Zoro burrowed his head into Sanji's neck, licking at his soft skin. Sanji let out a sigh. "I wasn't … sure about the n-nicotine," he said in a husky voice.

Zoro paid close attention to the way he was breathing. Was he wheezing? He was taking deep lungfuls of air, but what for? Was he just naturally breathless or was he seriously having trouble breathing? When he let out a moan as Zoro bit his neck, he knew he didn't have to worry.

For now, Sanji's breathing was normal. It was perfect and Zoro wanted to hear more of the sounds Sanji made without worrying about whether or not his partner couldn't breathe.

Zoro wasn't an idiot, he knew Sanji had a long way to go. That the blond needed to seriously go through a lot more than just nicotine patches before he was done, before he was considered safe from asthma attacks like the one that had Zoro's heart clenching horribly. But for now, for now they were perfect like this.

Maybe Sanji hadn't heard him before he had passed out, maybe he hadn't acknowledged Zoro's confession. That didn't matter right now. All he knew was that he didn't regret saying them, that they were true.

 _Aishiteru. Aishiteru Sanji. Now hurry up and fall in love with me so I can hear you say it too._

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous! God I write long answers to reviews._

 _JustCallMeLucie : The problem is this: Sanji's easy to shop for. Zoro on the other hand ... Oh God, I'm so glad I got his birthday out of the way, there goes buying other really hard gifts ... He'd probably also ask why everyone's turning blue and red too. **Death Note** was one of the first animes I watched, knowing it was anime. Besides **Pokémon** , I saw **Bakugan** and I was like, "this is cool!" (cause i was like, in 4th grade at the time) and "why's the art-style so different? It's so awesome!" and then **Death Note** , I knew was anime and I just remember buying the first volume (2 in one! Yay!) and our cleaning lady who comes twice a week was like, "he's cute!" and I was at that point where L introduces himself and I was like, "I'm not going to agree with her, I'm not," and I managed to keep my mouth shut._

 _Guest : Why would I kill Sanji? Zoro would probably die, he's gotten to the point where he'd probably die without Sanji's cooking! Oh God, I got into yaoi about like, a year and a half ago, I watched **Naruto** before that and I just remember my first reaction to that kiss was like, "Oh God, that's disgusting!" and my friend was like, "it's for humour's sake" and now when I watch it, I'm like, "oh God that's so sweet!" I read this Naruto and Sasuke story called **One** where it says that Sasuke paid someone to bump into Naruto, I squealed so much at that._

 _versora : I didn't think of anime movies, to be honest, but thanks for telling me. I haven't seen **Lupin III** , but I know there's a cross-over with **Detective Conan** (yay Shinichi!) so I'll be looking into that._

 _Tulula-Mate: Thank you! I'm really glad you like it!_

 _Shizuka Taiyou: Would you call getting asthma sick, exactly? I was just sick and tired of Sanji smoking and having no consequence for it whatsoever, I just remember when I first met his character, I was like, "what the heck? He's going to an early grave, smoking all the time!" I love that Sanji smokes, but hate that there's never anything that comes as a consequence for it._

 _lilcutieprincess : Okay now for an anime marathon, that would mean that Sanji watches **Love Stage ! !.** Um, I don't think he does. I will find reasons for why Zoro has to watch it though. Course, I don't know if you were talking about the references in the chapter or the list of anime Zoro should be forced to watch. Zoro's reaction to the corset scene in **Black Butler..**. Oh God, I love it._

 _Random Person : I should've used WordReference, it's what I use for Spanish class and I know it's at least a bit more reliable than Google Translate._

 _Guest #2: Yeah I thought about that. I was like, "DID I JUST GIVE SANJI AIDS?" and then I decided I didn't know enough about STDs to do that and I put symptoms into chapters 28, 29 and 30, so I was like, "no, let's not change it". Would you believe me though if I said I had school project on STDs where our teachers put a bunch of STDs names in a hat, put on the music from **The Price is Right** and called us down like we had just won something? Then they announced out STD to the whole class loudly and proudly. Trust me, I can't look a **t The Price is Right** the same way again._

 _mandacub : I like it too, but at the same time, I like it when they do things that are only endearing if they're them, like Zoro making Sanji soup. He sucked at it, it tasted horrible and Sanji wanted to puke, but it was Zoro doing it so it made it sweet. Those are the odd romantic gestures I love the most._

 _Guest #3: Thank you! I try really hard to make the chapters at least 4000 words, which is why my barely 2000 word chapter 33 is pissing me off! MUST. WORK. HARDER!_

 _VictoriaLovesmut : I've heard of that thing. It's shotacon isn't it? Um, the thing is, these would kind of have to be shows that Sanji watched, right? So uh, why would he watch that? I will look into it though._

 _So I figured out what I'm doing. I won't have an anime marathon of different animes, rather, I'll have the chapters as normal, but instead of mentioning a bunch of animes and having quick small reactions to them, it'll be an anime marathon of that anime. There will be several anime marathons so don't worry, I'll get to them all eventually. Somehow._

 _I have a question for you all now. Sanji and Zoro went off to play their "Rating Game", if you remember from chapter 19 (oh my God, I write a lot ...) it's a game where they see someone and then they give them a number from one to ten, ten being the highest, one being the lowest. The number is rating their attractiveness. Fractions are allowed in here. **Now, if you were to rate both Zoro and Sanji, Zoro separately, Sanji separately and then them together, what would those ratings be?**_


	32. Withdrawal

_**Author's Note** : So I don't own **One Piece** or **Hetalia**. Also, this chapter was partially based off a wonderful **Naruto** one-shot called **Burning Kisses** about Ino helping Shikamaru stop smoking. Also, there wasn't going to be anything overly sexual in this chapter, but uh, things got away from me. I swear I'm cursed though, while I was writing it, whenever I'm writing a scene like this, it's like the world wants to punish me and has me called by a friend or something, as though telling me, "What you're doing is wrong, please, talk to an innocent person who doesn't know this is what you're doing and feel the guilt". It sort of works, but I wrote it anyway! Also, a lot of this chapter was improvised because I really didn't want to give you another sucky short chapter, so in this chapter, the part about fighting was improvised, the insulting game (which I played with my friend to point out that yes, she's bossy and sassy and when she says she isn't sassy, she says it with sass). Like the last time, I will put a seperator as a warning for what's coming up, and uh, I looked at the upcoming chapters and realized uh ... there's a couple more sexual things coming up. Things are heating up I guess ... God I hope I don't screw this up._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster**_  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **There's sexual content. There wasn't going to be and then ... stuff happened.**

* * *

Chapter 32: Withdrawal

* * *

 _Blackleg (God, I_ ** _really_** _like the sound of that) Sanji's Survival Journal, day 3_

 _It has been slightly over seventy-two hours since I last had a cigarette. I think I'm twitching, the pencil's not straight right now, it's jagged. I'm trembling, I know it. Fuck, I need to smoke! Why the hell am I writing on a stupid post-it note anyway?_

Sanji sighed and crumpled up the paper before throwing it into the recycling. Fuck, he was going absolutely insane. Journals? Fuck that! He rolled up his sleeves and stared at the three patches on his arm. Fuck, he needed more. He needed more or he needed something equal to the relaxation he felt with the cancer stick as Zoro called it. He was going to drive himself up the wall if he didn't get it.

"Sanji?"

"What?!" he snapped, turning to Zoro who seemed to recoil at his sudden screaming. Sanji pinched the bridge of his nose. "What," he repeated in a less violent tone. "I'm sorry," he said, taking a deep breath. "I'm just … argh, this is driving me fucking crazy!"

Zoro nodded. "Okay … I have an idea."

"Oh yeah? And what's that, Marimo?"

"You're going to run out of patches by the time we hit Sunday, I can already tell, and that's just three days away. You can't rely on nicotine patches to get you off of this, you need a different fix, a quicker one."

"Your point?" Sanji asked, feeling irritable.

"Replace your cigarettes with something else, something material or some shit like that, until the urge to smoke goes away," Zoro said. "I don't know, say … Okay, I have a habit I developed after I stopped drinking. Whenever I felt like drinking, I'd pull at my hair to distract myself until the urge went away. You can't use something small like nicotine patches or a little action for shock therapy, especially if it's self-delivered. If every time you felt the urge to smoke, you hit yourself, you'd want to stop the pain, which would mean you'd stop delivering the blows. Find an action you can do and when you feel the urge to smoke, do it until the urge goes away. It should help."

"Isn't that how you develop other habits?" Sanji asked. "Moodie used to bite her nails. To stop, she started to make small knots in her hair. She still does that."

"Yes, but when you replace a bad habit with a slightly less bad habit, you get better, right?" Zoro reasoned. "I don't know, watch anime until the urge to smoke stops."

"I could never do that!"

"Why the fuck not?"

"Because then I'd have to finish the episode, which means that I'd have to watch the next one because the kind of anime I watch doesn't give you much of a choice! There are so many fucking cliff-hangers! On top of that, do you have any idea how many anime characters smoke? Hell, there's a guy who can turn his body into smoke in one of them!"

"Is that he one with the rubber man?"

"Yes," Sanji said, rolling his eyes.

"What was the name of that show again?"

"Zoro, that's not the point!"

"But why are you watching crack like that? I mean there's that freaky swordsman who just let himself be cut up into pieces by that guy with the feather in his hat—"

"Zoro, focus!" Sanji said. He dug into his pocket only to come up dry again. "Fuck, fine, say your method works, what the fuck am I supposed to do?"

Zoro shrugged. "I don't know, what distracts you?"

Sanji thought about it. What _did_ distract him anyway? Well there wasn't much, he was a pretty focused man. When he was cooking, he supposed he could be "distracted" from smoking, but then again, every time he cooked, he was still smoking. He'd feel irritable to cook without the cigarette in his mouth. It was annoying him now to cook without it for fuck's sake. He looked at the green-haired man up and down, somewhere in the back of his mind he was wondering whether or not Zoro realized he was doing it.

Zoro distracted him. He distracted him a lot actually.

But he couldn't very well say that, now could he?

"Fighting," he said instead. Fighting _did_ distract him, especially fighting against Zoro.

"So you're going to pick a fight whenever you want to smoke?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"So? You got a problem with that?" Sanji demanded through gritted teeth.

"No, it's not a problem at all," Zoro said. "In fact, I'm in the mood to fight. You craving a cigar yet, cook?"

Sanji gritted his teeth. "Desperately."

* * *

 _CLINK_!

Sanji deflected the blade using his leg. He pushed himself forward to fight against Zoro's attack, but his mind was still distracted. He still wanted the cigarette, he still wanted the smoke in his lungs. Of course he knew it wasn't good for him, his trip to the hospital was proof enough of that but still … He bit the inside of his cheek, trying to strike Zoro down using a kick to his chest.

The swordsman backed up and readied his swords as though there was nothing else to it. Of course he wasn't as tired as Sanji was, he had stamina, proven by his fight against Sanji at Partys. Just thinking about it made Sanji shiver with excitement. He went for another attack when he stopped, coughing into his arm.

Zoro stopped his attack completely and withdrew his swords, sheathing them. "You okay?" he asked Sanji, covering the distance between them. He put a hand on Sanji's shoulder and frowned. "How's your breathing?"

Sanji slapped his hand away and glared at him, but it was cut off by another coughing attack. He pushed at Zoro's chest, to distance himself from him. His throat felt sore, but it also felt like there was something stuck in his throat that unless he managed to cough it up, it would bug him. He could feel it, climbing up his esophagus, but just when he thought it would come out, it slid back down. "Fuck," he muttered.

"They gave you an inhaler, right?" Zoro asked.

"This isn't an attack," Sanji snapped. "Just … I don't know, mucus or something." He coughed again, but nothing came out. Fuck it, he could live with that annoying thing in his throat. He was doing just fine anyway.

"Strenuous activity should refrained from being performed before you get your asthma under a manageable state. At least, that's what the pamphlet says," Zoro told him. "We should probably sit down."

Sanji didn't say anything as Zoro guided him towards the couch and he sat down, his knees giving out from under him. He didn't care about the fact that he couldn't fight with Zoro anymore, that didn't matter to him, not right now. What mattered was that such a small thing, a tiny coughing fit, was enough to make the swordsman stop his fight all together. He hadn't stopped when they were training, hadn't stopped when Sanji had keeled over from a low blow to his gut, hadn't stopped when Sanji had been forced to the floor numerous times and had a dizzy headache. No, instead he had told Sanji to get the fuck up and keep going. If he stopped now, then he'd get into the habit of stopping when things got a little rough.

He didn't want to be weak, not in Zoro's eyes.

Sanji put his arms on his knees and leaned forward. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. Why did he feel so emotional recently? He blamed it on the asthma. Was that what the tightness in his chest had been?

" _Hetalia'_ s on," said Zoro. "You wanna watch?"

"I'm good," Sanji replied. He took a deep breath and felt his ribs hurt as he did so. There was a pain going all the way down his spine so that when he sucked in his breath, he could feel it travel up his spinal chord, felt the air as it rose up out of his chest and into the world around him. He felt as though his lungs were collapsing as he took each breath, as though someone were twisting them, trying to make him suffocate.

He took long breaths, deep ones, trying to ease the pain. It hurt his head, it hurt his body everywhere. "It's just fucking asthma," he muttered to himself. "Why is this so hard?"

Zoro was frowning. He looked uncomfortable, like he wanted to say something but couldn't, like he wanted to do something but couldn't.

Sanji waited a few minutes until the tightness eased and his throat felt more clear. He took a deep breath before nodding slowly. "I'm okay."

Zoro shook his head. "Fuck, you couldn't have just been some traumatized person?"

"What the fuck?" Sanji demanded, giving Zoro a confused look.

"I mean something like that … something like that is easier than asthma," Zoro said. "If it were something like trauma, words could help you, I could just talk you through it but this … This is different," he muttered. "I can't get inside your head, I can't understand your level of pain and I don't know the root of the problem." He held up a very child-friendly looking brochure that explained asthma in brief. "This fucking thing is useless, it just talks about bronchioles and shit like that. What am I supposed to do? How can I even do anything?" He looked helpless, he really did. Turning his head away, Zoro jutted out his chin as though to look more prideful. "Fuck, if you're in pain … I want to help," he said softly. "But I mean … what can I do?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip.

Zoro had helped him, more than he'd ever know.

His nightly visits to the Baratie had been the high-light of Sanji's days when he was waitering. He never once regretted them, even when he was being abused three times as harshly as usual and after some serious thought, he realized the rape was in no way Zoro's fault either. He didn't regret Zoro seeing him at his weak point, when Patty had hit him. If he hadn't seen it, who knew where they'd be.

When Zoro had "kidnapped" him, he had to say that was the turning point of his life. That first night … That nightmare had been so vivid and though Zoro had been awkward beyond belief, he had managed to do exactly what Sanji had needed. He was the very distraction he thought was mandatory, he helped him get through it. He stayed up at odd hours just to listen to Sanji ramble on in the kitchen while making some dish or another, or sometimes Sanji would forgo all conversation and just hum and yet though Zoro was tired, he had never slept during that time. The occasional comments while Sanji was cooking was proof of that, even if it was four nights in a row that they spent three hours in the kitchen from two in the morning till five.

His strange Random Word Association had seemed meaningless at the time and maybe Zoro didn't even care about it now, but to Sanji, when he thought about it, even if he didn't believe in therapy, he thought he had learnt a lot about Zoro.

Nakama. He had said they were nakama. But what about now? What were they now?

Taking him to Partys, going to kendo tournaments, playing all of Sanji's stupid word games … Zoro was a life-saver, even if he didn't know it.

Sanji smirked. "Entertain me."

Zoro raised an eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah?" he asked. "How should I?"

Sanji thought for a moment. "Kiss me."

Zoro's eyes widened. "W-what?"

Immediately, Sanji felt embarrassed. He turned his head away and looked at the floor sheepishly. "Never mind—"

"Are you sure?"

Sanji looked at Zoro strangely. "What?"

"I asked you are you sure?" Zoro repeated. "Do you really want me to kiss you?"

Sanji blushed. "You're fucking embarrassing, you know."

"You're avoiding the question," Zoro pointed out.

"Well I mean … if you …" Sanji turned a shade darker. "If you want."

And that's how Zoro pulled Sanji by his chin and kissed him softly.

Sanji had learnt to classify Zoro's kisses under different categories.

There were kisses like their first kiss, where Zoro was soft and hesitant and they barely lasted more than three seconds. Those were the ones that were sweet, a tad nervous and awkward, but not entirely unpleasant. They were the quick ones Zoro gave him right before either of them left the house.

There were kisses like their second kiss, slow, soft and just a tad hot that were sensual. They didn't rush anything, they didn't demand anything. They were usually initiated because of a romantic moment and even after the kiss was over, their lips would linger for a moment before pulling away but physical contact always remained.

There were kisses like the one on Valentine's Day, that started fierce and stayed fierce before slowing down to something soft and sweet, slow and sensual. They had only shared two of those, on Valentine's Day and on his birthday. Those were the kinds that made him feel like he was burning, as though, regardless of contact, he'd never get quite enough of it.

There were gentle kisses that turned hot thanks to Zoro, like when playing the Nervous Game. It bordered on a make-out session, but fell short.

This kiss though … This kiss held something to it that Sanji couldn't place it. It was slow, it was soft and it was sweet. It was hesitant as Zoro licked his bottom lip gently, pulling him in closer. He kept his hand on Sanji's chin, keeping him close. There was no feverish primal need, it was almost as though Zoro was trying to speak without words. He wrapped an arm around Sanji's waist and pulled him into his lap, but the kiss was still slow. The way Zoro touched him was slowly, carefully, not as though he was nervous, more as though each place he touched Sanji was calculated and deliberate.

His hands never went to his chest, he avoided it like the plague, instead going to Sanji's arms, his hands, running along his back, his waist. He never touched Sanji's legs either. Zoro had a hand wrapped around Sanji's neck, slowly guiding him towards him.

When they finally separated to breathe, Sanji's heart was racing.

"I have an idea," Zoro said slowly. "How about … I become your drug?"

Sanji could do nothing but stare at him in confusion.

"Whenever you need to smoke, find me. For every cigarette you want to have, I'll give you a kiss. Replace your addiction with something else, something different that isn't necessarily bad."

"You just want to kiss me more," Sanji accused.

"You're inexperienced, you think kissing you is pleasant?" Zoro asked him. He rolled his eyes when he saw Sanji's eyes drop to the ground. "I'm kidding seriously. Well, no, you're still not that great at it, but I mean …" He seemed to be searching for words desperately, trying to figure out what to say to Sanji that didn't make him sound like a jackass. Without even thinking about it, Sanji started to laugh at him. "Shut up!" Zoro snapped. "It's just … Fuck, argh!" He ran his fingers through his hair in a way that sort of reminded Sanji of mowing grass. He'd probably get more pissed off if he mentioned it though … "It's … I don't know, it's refreshing. You don't seem to be concerned about that, you're …" He shook his head. "It's complicated, but the point is kissing you doesn't suck."

Sanji smirked. "Wonderful Marimo, you sure have a way with words."

"Shut up."

He was blushing. How cute. He kind of reminded Sanji a tad of a tomato, with the green hair making up the small leaves. Another analogy the moss-head would kill him for.

"So let me get this straight, if I may," Sanji said slowly. "You want to transfer my addiction from my cigarettes to your kisses?"

"It didn't sound that screwed up in my head, but yeah," Zoro said slowly.

"Then Zoro, you have to kiss me again," Sanji replied with a smirk.

Zoro did.

And it was fucking amazing.

* * *

"So it was asthma?"

Sanji nodded. "Yeah, apparently, smoking's bad for you. They said it was a miracle I didn't get cancer. Not everyone who smokes get asthma, but it does increase the chances of it."

"I thought it was something you were born with," said Usopp, confused.

"It can be," Sanji said. "It's genetic, apparently. But if you have it when you're young, you can gradually grow out of it, I suppose you could say? You only get symptoms in special cases. You can get it when you're older though too, hence why I've got a stupid pump in my pocket now. I don't know exactly how it works, but if I avoid triggers, I should be fine. After a while, I can return to my usual life-style, I just can't smoke." He gritted his teeth at the thought.

"Thank God," said Nami. "You really had us worried there Sanji!"

"I'm sorry to have caused you distress, my lady," Sanji said, giving her an apologetic smile.

"You're a fucking idiot, you know," said Zoro. "This bastard," he gestured towards Sanji, "was apparently showing symptoms since January and he kept smoking, even though it irritated him. Are you kidding me? When you start having coughing fits while smoking, that means you stop!"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You've never tried it, you don't know how addicting it is."

Luffy grinned. "You guys are great for each other's health!"

"What the fuck do you mean 'great for each other's health'?" Zoro demanded. "This guy drives me up the wall all the fucking time, are you kidding me? He nearly gave me a heart attack, has caused me numerous headaches, restless to no sleep at all, and he fucking turned me gay!"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "I didn't ask you to fall in love with me," he said.

Zoro blushed and looked in the other direction for a moment before glaring at Luffy. "What are you talking about, health and that shit?"

"Well I mean," Luffy said, "after you met Sanji, you stopped drinking, right?"

"Well yeah, that's cause the prices on their alcohol is fucking ridiculous," Zoro grumbled. "I mean really, martinis should not be that much and there's no way vodka could ever be worth over 10 00 yen."

"Just cause you always drank crappy beer, doesn't mean we always served it," Sanji said. "You're no better you know," he added. "You think I've been sleeping? And do you have any idea how many times you've screwed around with my head? You don't go easy on training, do you know how fucking sore I am when it's over?"

"But Zoro, if you didn't stop drinking, your liver would fail, wouldn't it have?" Luffy asked. "And Sanji, they said it was a miracle you didn't get cancer. Isn't it good that you stopped smoking?"

"That doesn't change the fact that he fucking pisses me off," they both said in unison.

Usopp stared at them in confusion. "Aren't you dating?"

"Doesn't mean we have to like each other," Zoro grumbled. "I'm allowed to dislike him on some days, aren't I? You can't honestly tell me Kaya never gets on your nerves," Zoro pointed out.

"No, she doesn't."

"That's cause you got the fucking princess," Zoro snapped. "I got the dragon who breathes nicotine."

"Don't talk about Kaya that way!" both Sanji and Usopp said in unison. "It's rude," Sanji finished.

"Okay, what about you Nami? You can't tell me you love everything Luffy does."

Nami seemed to think about it. "It's not that I don't love everything he does, it's just that I don't like everything he does," she said slowly. She held Luffy's hand and gave him a smile. "But it's a really small list, I swear."

"So in translation, you hate parts of him?" Zoro asked.

"God Zoro, no!" Nami said, shaking her head. "Hate … I don't hate anything about him, there are just some parts I don't like as much as others." She shrugged and then she got that gleam in her eyes. They were in trouble now, weren't they? "How about we play a little game?"

Sanji wanted to tell her that was his line, after all, he was the one who had all the little word games up his sleeve, but he refrained. It'd be impolite to say such a thing to a beauty like Nami.

"What kind of game?" asked Luffy, looking excited. Then again, the straw hat got excited about everything, meat especially.

"It's an insulting game," Nami said.

Sanji paled. The strange voice in his head was gone, yes, it didn't haunt him as much but that didn't mean he wasn't still insecure. The insecurities were building, making a mountain that was about to have an avalanche any second, knowing that this was something that could break the fragile balance the relationship he and Zoro had built. Zoro seemed to notice this and squeezed his hand.

"I think we're good Nami," he told her. He sent her a look as though she should know better but the redhead shook her head.

"Whatever you're thinking, it's not like that. Think of it as … poking at someone's pet peeves. There's nothing I'd insult Luffy on, trust me, but there are small things he does on the occasion that sort of annoy me a little. If you bring them to that person's attention, maybe they'll stop or you'll get a better understanding of them."

Zoro looked at Sanji, then back at Nami. Sanji was relaxing a little, just a little. Pet peeves? Those he could deal with, those he could change. Things about himself that he did were easy to change, weren't they? Then why was he having such a problem with stopping smoking? "How does it work? Why's it a game?" Sanji asked. "Sounds like a conversation you have to piss someone off really."

"Basically all you gotta do is complain. You take turns so if I turned to Luffy and said, I don't know, I don't like how he wears that hat with everything he owns—"

"Nami!" Luffy looked down at the ground with a pout. "You're being mean …"

"I don't mean it," Nami said quickly. "Really, I don't, I love your hat, you know that." She bit her lip before continuing. "Then he'd say something he didn't particularly like about me like … say … I don't know, something."

"How you're a nag?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Don't talk about Nami like that," Sanji said, frowning. "You're unbelievably rude you know!"

Nami turned to Luffy as though expecting him to say something. "Well? Do you think I'm a nag?"

"Um …" Luffy bit his bottom lip. "Kinda …"

Nami frowned.

"I can't lie, I'm not Usopp!"

"Hey!"

Nami sighed. "I know you can't." She shook her head. "Anyway, I guess I shouldn't really call it a game, call it more a test of strength in the sense that, the couple that can name the most things without wringing each other's throats is the victor."

"You're asking for a death match, you realize, don't you?" Sanji asked. "And besides, Kaya isn't here, even if Usopp calls her on the phone the fear of bodily harm is eliminated."

"I was actually going to visit her," said Usopp. "Though I don't think we'll be playing your … 'game'. I think we'll do fine without it."

"You're just scared she'll say something about your goggles," Zoro teased as Usopp picked his bag up and went to the door.

"I am not!"

"Liar, liar, your goggles are on fire!"

 _SLAM!_

Zoro laughed while Sanji rolled his eyes. God he was so childish.

"So, you wanna play?" asked Nami. "You and Sanji against me and Luffy."

Zoro gave Sanji a look. "You want to?" he asked him.

Sanji shrugged. "I don't mind." With that annoying voice gone, games like these were less worrying for him. He was still worried of course, but if he played that meant he had a reason he could insult Zoro on all of his strange habits.

"Okay," Nami said. "How about you guys go into the kitchen and me and Luffy will stay in the living room?"

"Luffy and I," Zoro said tiredly. "God, you guys both suck at grammar." He tugged at Sanji's arm. "Come on, let's go."

Sanji followed him and when they entered the kitchen, he immediately grinned. "Did you know you play with the drawstrings of your sweatpants?"

Zoro stared at him. "What?"

"You pull and play with the drawstrings of your sweatpants," Sanji repeated. "And it's very annoying. You want to know why?"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Enlighten me."

"Because it almost makes the same sound of someone rubbing on a zipper and you have no idea how irritating I find that," Sanji said.

Zoro stared at him. "You don't like the fact that I play with the drawstrings of my pants because it _almost_ sounds like someone rubbing a zipper?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

It wasn't until he repeated it to him that Sanji realized how stupid that sounded, but it was true. It _did_ annoy him.

"Yes," he said more confidently then he felt.

"Okay, fine, my turn then Curly Brow," Zoro said.

Sanji closed his eyes, bracing himself for whatever blow Zoro was sure to deliver. "Did you know you're a tease?"

Sanji blinked. "What?"

"You're a tease," Zoro repeated. "I swear, the amount of times you turn me on in a single day is ridiculous, it's like I'm in high school or something. It drives me fucking insane. Just the sound of your voice …" He took a step closer to Sanji and wrapped an arm around his waist. "God it makes me hot …"

Sanji pushed at Zoro's chest and Zoro let him go. "You're fucking embarrassing, you know that? How do you even say those kinds of things? Don't you feel any embarrassment?"

"Course," Zoro said. "I'd be an idiot if I didn't feel embarrassed."

"Then why the fuck do you say them?"

"Because it's worth it to see how embarrassed _you_ get," Zoro said with a grin.

"You get horny a lot," Sanji noted. "It's kind of irritating."

"That just means I'm healthy."

"No, that means you need to get laid."

"I would if I could but my boyfriend's a tease so …" Zoro trailed off.

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "I thought you said you didn't mind."

"Didn't mind what?"

"That …" Sanji blushed red. "That we're not … doing _it_."

Zoro's eyes widened. "I don't," he said hurriedly. "I don't mind at all."

"But you're so …" Sanji tried to find a word, something to describe the state Zoro seemed to constantly be in. He shook his head, unable to find a word. "You're just so … pent up? Excited? Overtly sexual? In heat?"

"Not always," Zoro said. "Besides, isn't that normal? I'm dating an attractive guy," Zoro pointed out. "It'd be stupid if I didn't lust after him."

"Have you ever even done it with a guy before?"

"Well no, but you know, the internet teaches you wonderful things."

Sanji stared at him. "I don't know if I should feel disgusted that you looked that up, or flattered that I turned you gay so you had to look that up."

"How about flattered?"

Sanji shook his head. "No, I'm going with disgusted. Oh God, tell me you erased the history, don't tell me if I press the back button I'm going to end up watching some gay porno."

"I didn't watch anything," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "Look, it's my turn, isn't it?" He seemed to think for a moment before he spoke. "You don't understand me when I speak French."

"I thought we went over this, I only know Japanese and Latin fluently," Sanji reminded him.

"Yeah, I know but still …" Zoro smirked. " _Si tu pouvais me comprendre, t'auras aucun doute que tu es tellement belle dans mes yeux. Tu pouvais savoir que je t'aime, mais, malheureusement tu ne sais pas._ "

"When you talk French it annoys me," Sanji said, glaring at Zoro. "I swear if you're cursing me behind my back, I'm going to fucking kill you."

"How can I curse you behind your back if I'm looking at your face?" Zoro pointed out.

"You're so annoying," Sanji snapped.

Zoro smirked. "All in a day's work."

Though Sanji had to admit he didn't particularly like these things about Zoro, the drawstrings, the constant horniness, the sudden language barrier he seemed to pull up on the occasion, Sanji found it fucking sexy when he smirked like that. He pulled Zoro by his shirt and dragged him into a kiss, much to the Marimo's surprise.

Zoro's lips parted in his shock and Sanji took control of the kiss, pressing him up against the kitchen wall. The taste on his lips … The taste of Zoro was something, Sanji realized, nicotine could never compare with.

When they parted, Zoro gave him a funny look. "Craving a cigarette?" he asked.

"Yeah," Sanji lied. "Sorry, just … snuck up on me," he muttered.

"Hey," Zoro said in a soft voice, running his fingers along Sanji's cheek. "It's what I'm here for."

"To be randomly molested?" Sanji asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, that's what the subway's for, I was going to say randomly kissed, but I wouldn't complain if you decided to defile me," Zoro said, raising a suggestive eyebrow.

"Fuck you're a pain," Sanji told him, rolling his eyes.

He felt a bit guilty, considering he and Zoro were supposed to be playing a game and instead Sanji had kissed the idiot swordsman. He wanted to apologize to Nami but just as he exited the kitchen, he saw her in a lip-lock with Luffy.

 _Well then …_

Sanji grabbed his blazer off the couch and hissed at Zoro to stop snickering at them.

When they got back in the car, Sanji melted into his seat and ignored the way Zoro seemed to be fighting with the GPS. Instead he came across a rather interesting conclusion: at this rate, he'd be addicted to Zoro's kisses in no time.

* * *

Sanji knocked on Zoro's door and rocked on the balls of his feet. God he felt stupid. It had been two days filled with kisses in random places, pulling Zoro into the bathroom while grocery shopping, mauling him in the middle of the highway, nearly letting his food burn while he let himself be pressed up against the counter, even tasting Zoro's minty freshness right when he finished rinsing out his mouth from brushing his teeth. You'd think Sanji would get over it, but he hadn't. He just couldn't get enough. The need for nicotine was still there, sure, but Sanji had hidden it under layers and layers of want for the swordsman.

Zoro answered the door, half-awake. He blinked a few times as Sanji gave him a sheepish smile. "Um …"

"It's three in the fucking morning, tell me you don't want a cigarette," Zoro demanded.

Sanji let out a forced laugh.

Zoro sighed, but the grin on his face gave him away. He wrapped his arms around Sanji, pulling him into his room. He slammed the door shut and instantly pressed Sanji up against it, kissing him fiercely.

It was hot and desperate. It was demanding and ruthless. It was … it was fucking perfect.

Sanji's hands traveled through Zoro's green hair, fisting it tightly. Zoro's hands held his hips in place, pressed up against the wooden door. He moved from his lips to his ear, down to his neck. Zoro placed several soft kisses down Sanji's neck. The cook let out a gasp as Zoro's hands moved from his hips to his arms, running up and down them before one of his hands slipped under Sanji's shirt slowly, almost hesitantly. The feel of Zoro's hot fingers on his skin made Sanji moan, tossing his head back.

"Fuck, you're addicting," Zoro said, letting his hand wander higher on Sanji's chest, palming his nipples. Sanji arched into him, thrusting forward slightly. God he was so hard … he wanted it so badly … "You really like those cigarettes, don't you?" he asked, licking at Sanji's neck.

"Not … Not the cigarettes," Sanji gasped when Zoro bit at him softly.

"No?" Zoro said curiously, moving from Sanji's neck up to his lips. Zoro hovered over them, so close, but not touching. "Then what are you addicted to?"

"Is now really the time, Marimo?" asked Sanji, trying to close the space between them but Zoro backed away. "Fuck, let me kiss you."

"Not yet," Zoro teased. "I want to hear you say it."

"You know what I'm going to say," Sanji snapped.

Zoro shook his head, leaving just enough space between them so that Sanji had to move to kiss him, but obviously, that wasn't happening. "I want to hear it," he said. He let his fingers brush over Sanji's lips gently. "From your mouth."

"Fuck, Zoro, _please_ ," Sanji begged, trying to pull the swordsman forward.

"Tell me."

"Zoro …"

"Tell me Sanji," Zoro said. "Tell me what you're addicted to and I'll blow you."

Sanji's eyes widened.

They had never done something so extreme before, not since a while before Christmas. They had never stepped over that barrier again and suddenly, Sanji found himself wondering what it would be like. He had never experienced one before, had never had it done to him. Oh God, just remembering the way Zoro had reacted to it, he wondered what it would feel like … What would it be like if Zoro … "Fuck," he moaned.

Zoro smirked. "You look so hot right now … I bet you'd taste amazing …"

Sanji felt as though he was going to suffocate, but in the best way possible. It was as though his voice was caught in his throat and words had abandoned him completely. "Shit," he gasped. "I …"

"Can you imagine that?" asked Zoro in a soft voice, leaning closer to Sanji's ear, whispering in a husky voice. "My hot, warm mouth wrapped around your cock? I've never had a gag reflex, I could take you whole, deep-throat you." Sanji hissed, feeling his body heat up. "The taste of your cum, feeling it hit the back of my throat … I'd swallow it all. Every. Last. Drop." He punctuated each of his words with a thrust forward and Sanji felt like dying from the friction. "And to think all you need to do is tell me your addiction So Sanji, tell me. What are you addicted to?"

"Z-Zoro …"

"Yes?" That cocky bastard, he was smirking!

"I'm not saying it again," Sanji said in a hoarse voice.

"I'll take it."

With that, Zoro threw Sanji onto his giant bed. He hit the sheets with a soft thump and he licked his lips in anticipation as Zoro got onto the bed. He pulled off his shirt, smirking at Sanji. "Wouldn't want it to get dirty," Zoro said before he pressed Sanji up against the headboard so he was sitting upright. It was at that moment that Sanji could see himself in Zoro's large full-length mirror.

Sanji's blood ran cold. He tried to push Zoro away, God he hated to see himself, he looked so dirty, so … filthy. Zoro fought against him, ignoring his pushes in an attempt to shove him off.

"Sanji." Zoro's voice was soft. "You don't have to watch," he said. "If you want, I won't do it—"

"It's your fault I'm a fucking mess," Sanji snapped at him. "If you back out now, I'm going to fucking kill you!"

Zoro smirked. "Of course." Sanji felt his heart stop as he watched Zoro. The swordsman put his knees on either side of Sanji and was slowly unbuttoning Sanji's pants. "If it makes you uncomfortable, I'll stop," he told him gently. Zoro blushed. "I uh, I've never actually done this before so … um …" Zoro gently tugged at Sanji's zipper. "Tell me if you don't like it, okay?"

Sanji nodded, turning his head towards the ceiling.

* * *

Zoro slowly pulled at Sanji's pants, moving them down to his thighs and pulling Sanji's painfully erect member out of his boxers. Zoro started to stroke him and almost instantly, Sanji let out a cry. He had never touched himself before down there and the feeling of Zoro's hands on him sent a thrill down his spine.

"So sensitive," Zoro said in a soft voice. God, his voice … Though Sanji knew that Zoro liked his voice, Zoro probably had no idea what _his_ voice did to Sanji.

"Y-you don't need to," Sanji said, trying to calm himself down and failing. "I mean—"

"I want to," Zoro cut him off. "I figured I'd end up doing it a some point or another, right?"

Sanji found himself nodding, but that didn't mean his heart beat slowed down at all. If anything, it sped up. "But I mean, I can wait, I've never had this done before so it's not like I'm missing out on—FUCK!"

When Zoro said he didn't have a gag reflex, he meant it. Instantly, all seven and a half inches of Sanji were in Zoro's throat. He felt like he was melting. He grabbed onto the sheets around him, fisting them tightly. Zoro's mouth was so warm, so hot and wet … Sanji's hips bucked forward against his will and he moaned as Zoro started to suck on him slowly.

It felt like he was seeing stars in the ceiling so he lowered his gaze and instead focused his attention on Zoro. He was bobbing up and down on Sanji's length, slowly gaining speed. He reached out, gently running his fingers through his moss hair. Zoro paused for a second. Sanji wanted to cry when he stopped but Zoro continued almost immediately afterwards. Sanji felt like he was boiling, his skin felt too hot, the air seemed to be too much, his entire body was shaking.

"Stop," he choked out. "Zoro you have to stop, I'm … fuck, I think I'm going to pass out!"

Zoro didn't stop. In fact, he started to suck him faster, squeezing his balls at the same time.

It felt like there was a tug at the pit of his stomach, pressure in his ears, his grip on Zoro's hair tightening. His hips thrusted forward and he watched as Zoro took all of him, meeting his gaze as he sucked and Sanji came undone.

* * *

Zoro pulled off, licking his lips. "I was right. You do taste good."

Sanji tried to regroup himself but he felt like he was still in shock. His legs felt heavy, he couldn't move. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart beat, but it didn't work. Not at all. He let go of Zoro's hair and the swordsman grinned.

"You look so fucking sexy when you cum," Zoro told him in a hoarse voice. "Makes me want to make you cum again."

" _Again_?" Sanji croaked out, feeling breathless. He could barely handle it the first time and Zoro thought he could go through it again? Was he fucking insane? He reddened when he saw himself in Zoro's mirror.

Sanji's cheeks were flushed red, his eyes half-lidded. His hair was in a disarray, though somehow, he still managed to keep a single eye covered. His clothes stuck to him in his sweaty state. He looked like a mess. But there was something else, something in his eyes that Sanji was sure wasn't there before. He wouldn't say he liked his reflection, he didn't and he got the feeling he never would, but right now, in this moment, he didn't mind it.

Zoro leaned over Sanji's body, pressing his forehead against his. "I really want to kiss you right now," he said softy.

"Then do it," Sanji told him.

"You don't mind?" Zoro asked. "Your cum …"

"You swallowed it all, didn't you?" he asked with a smirk.

Zoro grinned widely and kissed him, pressing him against the headboard even more so.

The feel of Zoro under his fingertips, his hot skin, the scars, the muscle, Sanji was ready to melt all over again.

He bit his lip and looked away from him, trying to catch his breath. "Is it always like that?" he asked.

Zoro smirked. "Sometimes, if you're doing it with the right person."

Sanji nodded. "Am … am I the right person?"

Zoro gave him a smile. "You're the only person."

Sanji stared at him in wonder. "O-only?"

"First person I've ever done that for," Zoro said. "And you're the only one I want to do it for." He grinned. "I wouldn't mind if I were the only one for you too, but …" He trailed off. "I know it's not like that."

God Sanji felt horrible. Zoro was … Zoro was nothing like Sanji had expected, but everything he wanted. He wished he could turn back time, go back to before, before the cooks had ruined him, before this whole fucking mess started. He wished he could meet Zoro under different circumstances. Maybe meet him as an ordinary customer. Maybe they'd have been great friends. Maybe then Zoro … maybe then Zoro could've been …

Everything Zoro was doing for him, it was his first time. He had no doubt he had done things with women, he had kissed them, had probably fucked a few, there was no way someone as hot as Zoro could be a virgin, had dated a couple, even if Usopp claimed it wasn't many. But everything he did with Sanji was a first time, doing the same things over again but with a man. He wondered if Zoro preferred it that way or if he missed the soft, smooth skin of a woman.

Sanji closed his eyes and wanted to pretend that everything they did was his first too. Zoro had already stolen his first kiss, first relationship, first friend even. But the one thing Sanji wished he could give Zoro, he couldn't. Because those bastards had taken it.

How different would it be if Zoro had gotten to him first? If Zoro had been his first time? God he wished it had been that way.

"I …" Zoro bit his bottom lip. "I've, well, you might not remember but …" He took a deep breath. "I told you something. Before you passed out. And I want to tell you it again."

"What?" Sanji asked in a soft voice.

"Aishiteru."

It was so soft, Sanji barely heard it but when he did, his breath caught in his throat. "Z-Zoro …"

"Aishiteru, Sanji," he repeated.

"I …"

"I'm not expecting an answer," Zoro said quickly. "I just … wanted to tell you."

Sanji nodded, feeling choked up. God he was fucking emotional, wasn't he? But from the look in Zoro's eyes, he could tell the swordsman was also going through a roller-coaster of emotions as well. He reached up and gently touched his face. "I …"

Zoro shook his head, closing his eyes. "Don't force yourself to say anything," he said.

"But—"

"Sanji," Zoro said in a firm voice. "Please."

Sanji knew that though Zoro didn't want to force Sanji to say anything, he wanted to hear Sanji say it too. It was obvious. Fuck, this wasn't fair was it? Saying he loved him, but expecting no answer? Fuck that, Zoro was so clearly lying. It made Sanji feel like he should say it, but he knew why Zoro was hesitant to say it. Because he didn't want Sanji to think he had to say it too. He didn't want Sanji to feel obligated to give him a response, he wanted Sanji to tell him because he felt it too, not because he felt like it was his duty.

 _I can't say it yet Zoro,_ Sanji thought to himself, staring at the swordsman's face, his long lashes, his sharp features, his eyelids that when they were open, showed Sanji the most beautiful shade of hazel he had ever seen. _Not yet, but soon._

He gently ran his fingers over Zoro's lips, the younger man parting them in response, letting out a soft sigh.

 _Soon_.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank yous!_

 _JustCallMeLucie: Okay when I watched **Death Note** (cause I watch English dubs a lot, my confusion when Nobunaga from **InuYasha** was voiced by the same person as Light in the english dubs ... awkward) I showed it to my friend. Like all the things I do, even if I start first, they finish before me (including Harry Potter. I swear, the girl turned up with book 4 in hand on Thursday, on Monday she had book 6. **The Order of the Phoenix** is like, 700 pages. It's long. It's thick. It's scary!), they were like, "Near sounds like a drug addict, just a fair warning". No one replaces L to me though, God I got so pissed with the ending ..._

 _takafumi : I don't know why, but when I know a person, I know basic stuff about them. They've got this colour of eyes, this colour hair, they have tanned or pale skin, they're tall, blahblahblah, but when it comes to things like nose, lips and eyebrows? I don't really care. But I suppose if I actually met Sanji, yeah, I'd be kinda freaked out by his eyebrows ..._

 _Shizuka Taiyou: Well isn't that ironic. What if **One Piece** went to Oz and replaced everyone? Do you think Usopp could really pull off the cowardly lion who surprisingly isn't cowardly? Great, now I can see Sanji as a tin man and Zoro as a scarecrow. Maybe Luffy should be the scarecrow though, just for the sake of the straw he has ..._

 _Random Person: I think everyone likes what Zoro looks like more than Sanji. Or at least, most people._

 _mandacub : See, I like Sanji in the anime, just minus his obsession with girls. I think it's commendable that he doesn't want to fight one, but when there's someone like Alvida, then uh yeah, you gotta fight. I don't know, he made cooking badass to me. I swear his introduction episode when he was serving Fullbody and when the cooks said "did Sanji get into a fight again?" I was like, "again? This happens regularly? THIS COOKING IS AMAZING!" So yeah, I always liked Sanji from the anime, if he wasn't around girls. And I'm not sure when it was, but there was a demotivational poster I saw with them carrying fish I think and the subs were "Mine's bigger" and then I was just like, "yes, favourite pairing ever."_

 _lilcutieprincess : I do like to shock people, it adds to the whole effect. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter!_

 _fangal4life : I don't know, I usually find guys who wear suits like Sanji to be too stuck up, but he isn't. And I have to admit, I do love that tie of his. I hate wearing ties myself, but still, they look good on him and the reason to shove Zoro into a suit? Cause he'd look incredibly hot in it!_

 _CobraViperPython : Um, about Zeff ... His appearance isn't coming soon, not for a while ... Heh heh ..._

 ** _Alright, now for my question to you guys. Besides what Zoro said in French cause when I revising the chapter, I totally forgot that he spoke French, I've got another question for you. I've been reading a lot of Naruto and Sasuke stories (because honestly, I just love them) along with One Piece stories (which then make me think I'm so out of my league here ...) and so I've been thinking about Naruto's sexy jutsu. Alright, get ready. Zoro and Sanji, doing the sexy-jutsu. Who do you think would give you a bigger nose bleed?_**


	33. Tension

_**Author's Note:** Okay so I've finally decided it, this story will have 42 chapters. Yay! Okay, moving on from that, I don't own **Naruto** or **One Piece**. Chapter 35 hates me and chapter 34 is probably going to be changed a lot as well. I'm thinking I'm going to go on an editing marathon for a while. Now, something I wanted to mention before but only got around to it now: Sanji's ... idea he proposes to Zoro is from **BuzzFeed**. I was also bored one night, reading **BuzzFeed** articles and found one that made my entire day and I'm still smiling. It's been a week and I'm still high off of it. It was basically describing how there was a preacher woman or something screaming outside a college, talking about how she isn't an alcoholic anymore and how gay marriage is horrible, unlawful and just plain horrible. So then these two boys just stand up, run towards her, stand right next to her and proceed to make out for like, fifteen seconds or something long like that before stopping, jumping down the stairs and basically screaming, "FUCK YEAH!" I love humanity in these rare moments. Some notes, the term "hentai" does not only mean porn, it also means "pervert". Also, when this story's over, I don't know which fandom I'll write for, **One Piece** or **Naruto** , cause I have ideas for both... It seems AU stories for anime works well for me. Anyway, I think that's all about my comments ... so yeah, enjoy. Also, the perverted part of this story gives you a warning (as usual) via dividers._

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster  
_** _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Zoro's fantasizing ... and maybe masturbating ...**

* * *

Chapter 33: Tension

* * *

Zoro swore, the blond was going to kill him one of these days.

It wasn't that it had been a few days and he heard no response to his confession. He didn't care about that ( _lie, lie, lie_ ). It wasn't that Sanji kept going to grab for his cigarettes, only to realize he had none. It wasn't even the fact that he was currently sitting in front of the TV, watching anime with Sanji. It was the fact that the cook gave him blue balls like no one's business.

"What's this one again?" he asked.

"It's _Naruto_ ," Sanji replied, rolling his eyes.

"Okay," Zoro said slowly. "So why the fuck is he wearing orange? Does he know how stupid that looks?" he asked. "It clashes with his hair!"

"Are you the fashion police suddenly?" Sanji deadpanned.

"Well, not but …"

"Exactly."

God, watching Sanji get defensive … It was wrong that it turned him on, wasn't it? Zoro bit his bottom lip. Fuck, okay, to distract himself? How to distract himself … "He's voiced by a woman, isn't he?"

"And if he is?" Sanji asked.

"Then that's stupid."

"You know, almost all pre-pubescent boys are voiced by girls," Sanji told him.

"Those goggles look hard as fuck to draw," Zoro said. "The drawer must have trouble with that—"

"First of all, it's called a mangaka, and second of all, Naruto doesn't wear the goggles all the time."

"Oh wait, his name's Naruto?"

Sanji gave him a look. "Are you kidding me? Please, tell me you're joking."

"So wait, if I understand this right, this … Naruto person is a blond oddball who has a swirly-ass tattoo on his stomach which seals this demon with nine-tails—"

"The nine-tailed-fox, Kyuubi, yeah—"

"Nine-tailed-fox, Kyuubi, it's all the same," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "So he's an oddball blond with the swirly-ass tattoo, which makes me realize you and him probably relate more to each other than I thought,. You both have fucked up swirls on your body …" He seemed to think about this for a moment. "And he wants to become the Sage—"

"Hokage, master of the village," Sanji corrected him.

"I'm learning here, I'm allowed to make mistakes," Zoro snapped. "Anyway, he wants to become the Hokage and he thinks that's possible by gender-bending himself, giving people nosebleeds, vandalizing sacred monuments and eating ramen?"

"He's just trying to become a ninja," Sanji said, rolling his eyes.

"Well he's doing a fucked up job at it," Zoro said. "Oh shit, did they just say he failed like, twice? So he's an ahou on top of it all?" Zoro shook his head. "Why do you like these people? They make horrible role-models." He sighed. "Who's that girl who's doing that weird fiddling shit with her fingers? And why the fuck does that girl have pink hair and a big forehead? And who's that dark person in her head? Why does that guy's hair look like a duck's butt?"

Sanji sighed. "I'm trying to share something I like with you," Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "You could at least appreciate the effort I'm putting into this instead of making fun of them."

"I'm not making fun," Zoro said defensively. "I'm just trying to understand the plot is all."

"Of course you are."

 _Well, I'm trying to understand this fucked up plot while trying to figure out how to get rid of this raging hard-on you left me with._

Not that he could ever tell Sanji that.

He respected Sanji, he really did. Just because Sanji turned him into a horny teenager who had just discovered what sex was (though that's what it felt like since Zoro had never imagined putting anything … _there_ , before), didn't mean he'd jump him. He told him he'd wait and he meant it. The most intimate their relationship had gone was two blowjobs, one by each member of the relationship. He found it odd that Sanji was so good at it, giving him the best blowjob of his life even though he had never done it before.

 _No, he's done it before. Never willingly though …_

For Zoro, everything he did for Sanji was new. It was like learning everything he thought he once knew, but with a different person but it changed. It wasn't like when Zoro got into a relationship with someone new and had to learn about them. He had already learnt a lot about Sanji, but now he was learning even more as their relationship developed deeper. He had started off knowing the worst of Sanji and he wasn't sure what it was that had drawn him towards him in the first place, but he was so glad whatever the fuck it was, it had. Dating a man was very different from a woman. Zoro hadn't thought it'd be different, but it was.

When Zoro had been with women, every word he said was calculated. He spent so much time pouring over what he was going to say, they got offended that he didn't open his mouth, even though the reason he hadn't spoken was to figure out what the fuck to say without offending them. The second he blew a fuse, finally combusted from pent up anger, they'd get angry, slap him and leave him. This was why Zoro tended to avoid relationships. With Sanji, Sanji had already seen his explosions and yes, he was careful around him at the same time, but not the same way he was with the girls. With Sanji he could show his anger, he could let it out, he just needed to make sure all his anger was directed at a punching bag, not at Sanji himself (not that he'd ever dream of it).

With women, Zoro's touches had to be soft. He couldn't press them up against hard surfaces for long before they started to complain about the pain in their back or some other kind of shit like that. Sanji didn't need hugs, didn't demand to cuddle. He didn't ask for anything, really. Except for his kisses, much to Zoro's delight. He didn't have to worry about being rough with him and him yelling he was in an abusive relationship and in turn, he could keep Zoro in line, something none of the other women could do. They'd always get upset and say nothing until they burst as well and blamed Zoro for nearly every wrong turn in the relationship. With Sanji, if Zoro was in deep shit with him, the cook let him know.

Because he had already lived with Sanji before they had started dating, Zoro didn't worry about his manners as much. Sanji had seen him eat at the Baratie for a long time and now he cooked for him daily, no, tri-daily. In the end, if Sanji was still around even with Zoro's less-than-perfect manners, he was good.

Relationships with men required so much less effort, so much less over-thinking, so much less carefulness—

No, that was a lie.

Because Zoro was _so smart_ , he kept fucking up his relationship, so yeah, it took a lot of effort to maintain it. From Sanji's inability to tell that Zoro didn't just kiss random strangers and should take this as a sign of dating, to the part where Zoro got groped by a tailor because he decided to let his big fat mouth speak and admit to his hatred of hearts and flowers and babies in diapers holding scary pointy objects. He worked so hard to keep this relationship with Sanji, scared he was walking on thin ice and yet at the same time it felt less stressful. It felt as though he didn't have to over-think things, not usually because Sanji just seemed to accept him the way he was.

Zoro gave the blond a sideways glance as he pulled his knees closer to him.

Yes, he definitely loved the man.

Was that why he didn't mind bending over backwards and doing crazy flips to get him to stay? Was that why it was easy? Maybe it wasn't because it was a relationship with a man, maybe it was just because it was Sanji.

"Aren't you paying attention?"

Zoro's eyes moved back to the screen and his eyes widened. "Why the fuck does that guy have silver hair?"

"It's anime, hair knows no bounds. And neither does yours, Marimo," Sanji added with a smirk.

"That reminds me, that guy pointed his chopsticks at his teacher—"

"Iruka Sensei, yeah, what about it?"

"Isn't that rude? And he didn't get scolded? Isn't he the guy grading him? What if he doesn't pass because —-oh fuck, he calls _that_ a clone?" Zoro wrinkled his nose. "It looks like a rag doll."

Sanji sighed. "God, what would you say if we watched _Shippuden_?"

" _Shippuden_?" Zoro repeated. "There's _more_?"

"Of course there's fucking more," Sanji said. "It's the best selling manga in the entire world, are you kidding me? The mangaka made ninja-manga history writing this thing," Sanji pointed out. "And if you think he ditches that orange jumpsuit, he doesn't."

"He _doesn't_?!"

"No, he just trades it for another suit with more orange and some black," Sanji said.

" _Seriously_?"

"Yup."

Zoro shook his head. Maybe _Naruto_ would be one of those animes of Sanji's that Zoro didn't totally hate, but still, that author had a fucked up sense of fashion. "That guy with the silver hair, he's lying, isn't he? That thing he told Naruto?"

"No shit."

Zoro watched for a moment. "Wait a minute, you're telling me this kid had a demon inside of him for his entire life and he didn't even know it?" Zoro demanded. "How the fuck does that happen?"

"A rule was decreed—"

"Fuck the rule, I think you'd know if you were sharing your body with another being!" Zoro shook his head. "Don't give me that fuck about a seal, how the fuck did he not know until that very moment? No one fucking told him? Not even his sensei?" He sighed. "The adults in this show are fucking bastards."

"The Hokage did it so that Naruto wouldn't be discriminated against—"

"Oh and that worked _so_ well, didn't it?"

"Shut up and watch," Sanji said.

There were of course, the occasional comments from Zoro, such as, "how the fuck can the silver haired dude throw something that big?" and "how the fuck is that Iruka guy not dead from that?" and "why the fuck can that guy see Naruto in a crystal ball? I think he's stalking him, isn't he? Fucking pedophile."

Of course, it was the fight against Mizuki-Sensei and Naruto that made Zoro lose his shit.

"HOLY FUCK, WHY ARE THEY MULTIPLYING?!"

Sanji sighed, but he seemed to be laughing at him.

"It's a valid question," Zoro snapped.

"It's Shadow Clone Jutsu, or rather, Kage no bunshin justu," Sanji said. "He said he was studying, remember?"

"And he just beats that guy up?" Zoro asked. "Fuck, he's weak."

Once the end credits rolled for the first episode Zoro shook his head. "That's a crummy ending, don't load all the crap of difficulties of being a ninja on him now, do it later? He's Naruto's role model, isn't he? Why the fuck doesn't he just tell it to him straight?"

"Um, because Naruto's twelve?" Sanji said as though this were obvious.

"Wait, if Naruto failed his test twice and that was his third year, does that mean people become ninjas when they're nine? Provided they pass the test?"

Sanji seemed to think for a moment. "They never mention it really … Wanna see the next episode?"

Zoro thought it over. Well, the show was distracting, he was still hard, how he had managed to stay hard for nearly half an hour, he didn't know. Maybe because he was overly aware of Sanji, but whatever the case, maybe another episode and he'd be able to look Sanji in the eye properly. Besides, as horrible of a fashion sense as this Naruto Uzumaki had, he had to say he was kinda growing fond of the hyper ball of energy.

"Fine, whatever."

Sanji smirked and the second episode began.

"WHY THE FUCK DOES HE LOOK LIKE THAT?!"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "It's his ninja ID, or registration or some shit like that," he said. "Honestly, can't you just watch without asking question?"

"Who's that guy in the shadows? It's not nice to sneak up on old men!" Zoro said, ignoring Sanji's comment.

"That's—"

"He tripped." Zoro shook his head. "He made the whole effort of hiding in the shadows and yet he ended up tripping on his own fucking cape. Who does that?" he demanded. "God he's so lame! And now he's blaming Naruto?"

"He's a kid," Sanji said with a shrug. "A pampered kid."

"Yeah, that's right Naruto, fucking punch the lights out of him!"

Sanji smirked. "I take it you like this show?"

Zoro froze, realizing how into it he was getting. He slumped back into his seat and crossed his arms. "It doesn't totally suck," he muttered to himself. "Doesn't mean all your other anime shit isn't shit."

Sanji smirked. "Whatever."

The more of the episode Zoro watched, the more he was sure he'd never get turned on by a girl again. Especially not if they looked like that fat ugly mess of a woman that the little kid tried to make. It was right around the end when Sanji turned to him. "I need a cigarette," he said.

Zoro smirked and pulled Sanji closer to him. "Oh yeah? How badly?"

"I think I might die," Sanji told him with a smirk.

Zoro closed the gap between them, gently brushing his lips against Sanji's.

The rolling credits for _Naruto_ became background noise as Zoro wrapped an arm around Sanji's neck, pulling him in as close as he could get. He was soft and gentle against Sanji's lips as the blond put a hand on Zoro's chest. He expected to be pulled away but instead, the cook pulled the swordsman closer, fisting his shirt and pulling him on top of him.

Oh fuck, Sanji was trying to kill him, wasn't he?

With their bodies so close to each other, Zoro swore he was going to go insane, every time Sanji moved, he could feel it, his soft, smooth skin exposed as his shirt rode up just a little. Zoro kept his eyes closed as he kissed him, trying to calm himself down. Getting this excited over kissing him was probably a bad thing. Zoro's hands reached out and grabbed at Sanji's tie. Why he wore one was beyond him, but he knew that it only served to bring them even closer.

Sanji grinned against Zoro's lips, testing the waters, darting his tongue out daringly.

Zoro gasped and Sanji took control.

As much as he loved having the cook at his mercy, having the roles reversed was not something he was opposed to. In fact, he felt light-headed as the blond's tongue did unspeakable things to him, exiting his mouth and moving up to Zoro's ear. It licked his ear lobe and gave it a soft bite. He sighed and used his arms to hover on top of Sanji, but Sanji followed, wrapping an arm around Zoro's neck and now they lay in a strange tangle of limbs that just had Zoro throbbing.

"Fuck, Sanji," he muttered as Sanji's lips moved down from his ear to his neck. He licked Zoro's Adam's apple, causing the green-haired man to gulp and moved to where neck met shoulder and bit down. Hard.

"Shit!" Zoro moaned.

Sanji pushed forward until they were sitting and continued using his talented tongue to drive Zoro to the brink of insanity.

This was bad. Zoro was loving it and Sanji didn't seem to mind either if the way his hand was crawling up Zoro's shirt was any indication, but fuck, they needed to stop.

Zoro gave a gentle push at Sanji's chest, his face flushed, his hair mused. "Y-you need to stop," he told him. He took a deep breath, swallowing. His throat felt dry and his pants were tight. Thank God for sweatpants.

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "You don't like it?"

"Fuck no, Sanji, that's not it."

Why was it that every time they had to stop, the cook was under the idiotic impression he had done something wrong? Why couldn't he just realize he was testing Zoro's limits, tempting him so badly, he was sure he was going to choke and cum in his pants.

Zoro let out a light chuckle. "That's not it," he repeated. "Shit, Sanji, do you really not know?"

"Know what?"

"What you do to me," Zoro said softly. He took Sanji's hand gently and guided it towards his member, watching as Sanji's eyes widened.

"Oh shit."

Zoro nodded. "The problem isn't that I don't like it, it's that I like it too much." He gently placed a hand on Sanji's cheek.

"Do you … do you want to do it?" Sanji asked, biting his bottom lip.

Zoro shook his head. "No, I'm fine. A little harder than healthy, but I'll be fine," he assured him. "Remember what I told you? I'm not with you because I want your body. I'm with you because I like you Sanji, sex has nothing to do with it."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Your raging hard on begs to differ."

Zoro sighed. "It's not my fault I don't think with my head all the time." He gave Sanji a serious look. "But I'm not kidding. If you're not ready for it, we won't do it, simple as that."

 _Yeah, you're going to sound calm and mature, not like a horny teenager who hasn't gotten laid in a year— holy shit, I think it's nearly been a year!_

Zoro grit his teeth, trying to ignore this train of thought and yet for some reason his mind kept fixating on it. _Wait, hold on, the last time I did it … I was twenty-two, right? And I've only recently turned twenty-three, so that must mean— wait, but it's been like four months since I turned twenty-three, which means I could've gotten laid at twenty-two and it could've still been a year. Fuck, who was the last person I fucked? When did I do it? Where? Fuck, what was her name?_

"Zoro?" Sanji asked.

"Huh?"

"You seem a bit distracted," Sanji said.

"Distracted?" Zoro shook his head. "No I'm not." _Was she blond? Did she have dark hair? Wait, what if I've just imagined it? What if I'm so sexually frustrated, I imagined everything and I'm still a virgin? Wait, no that's stupid, I lost that stupid thing when I was nineteen— fuck, what about her? What was the name of the girl I lost my virginity to? WHY CAN'T I FUCKING REMEMBER? I'm too young to have memory blanks!_ "Shit, my memory's impaired …"

"Zoro, what are you talking about?" asked Sanji with a confused look.

"Nothing, never mind," Zoro said, running his fingers through his hair. Why the fuck were his pants still so tight? Was he still fucking hard? _God Sanji, you're going to kill me._ "What were we talking about?"

Sanji sighed. "Never mind." He looked Zoro up and down before biting his lip. "Do you … do you want me to …" He trailed off and gestured towards Zoro's pants. The air felt so incredibly awkward.

"God ye— do you want to?" Zoro stopped himself at the last minute. He could control himself, just because his libido was out of control didn't mean he couldn't be rational. He could survive this, he _would_ survive this.

"Do _you_ want me to?" Sanji asked, seeming to look everywhere but at Zoro.

"Only if you want to," Zoro said quickly.

"Well I mean …"

"Were you offering?" Zoro shook his head when he saw the uncomfortable look on Sanji's face. "Never mind, it's not that big of a deal," he said. "I'm just … I'm going to take a shower. Don't move forward, I wanna see the next episode, don't you dare start without me."

With that, he practically ran out of the room and into the bathroom.

Locking the door quickly he slipped out of clothes and turned on the water, pressing his forehead against the cold tile of the shower. Fuck, he was going to die from suppressed sexual desires, wasn't he? God, it was like he had taken some aphrodisiac or some shit like that. He bit his lip, looking at the door. It was locked, right?

It felt so wrong to do this …

* * *

Slowly, Zoro wrapped his hand around his aching member and began to stroke himself. He pressed his back against the wall and nearly felt himself fall to his knees. With how hard he was, it was no wonder if he came in mere seconds. Fuck and the fact that Sanji was right outside, sitting on that couch oblivious to everything … It felt dirty and yet his mind seemed to enjoy torturing him with pictures, with images that made him shiver.

Sanji, lying on that couch with his shirt unbuttoned, his tie loose around his neck, his pants hanging low on his hips, his arms above his head, his mouth slightly open, gasping, moaning as Zoro ran his hands over that delicious skin of his … Kissing him, feeling Sanji thrust up against him, grinding into him.

"Fuck," Zoro hissed, stroking himself faster. The tiled shower probably echoed, the cold water was doing absolutely nothing to help him at all.

 _"Fuck me Zoro," Sanji said in a raspy voice. "Fucking ram your cock into me, Marimo."_

"Shit …" Zoro's footing seemed off and he felt himself beginning to slip, the cold tiles soothing against his hot body. He didn't think he had ever gotten this worked up over any other fantasy he had ever imagined. There was something that was so erotic about the cook that just made Zoro harder.

He could see Sanji in his mind, riding him, smirking with that fucking cigarette in the corner of his mouth, like he didn't have a care in the world. He'd yell at Zoro to be better, to go harder, faster, that he wasn't made of glass. Wrap those delicious legs around him, forcing Zoro deeper inside of him …

"Fuck me," Zoro gasped, trying to keep his voice down. Having Sanji so close, a few meters and a door separating them made it all the more exciting when his thoughts suddenly changed.

 _"Hey Zoro …" Sanji made a beckoning motion with his finger before putting it in his mouth and sucking on it. He was wearing one of Zoro's shirts, too big for him, too fucking sexy to be legal. "Let me fuck you."_

 _He flipped Zoro over, pressing him against the kitchen table. "Itadakimasu." Sanji proceeded to lick down Zoro's back, hitting sensitive spots Zoro wasn't even aware he had and then suddenly, Sanji started to fuck him, shoving two fingers inside of him._

"Holy shit!"

Zoro froze. That was way too loud. There was no way Sanji didn't hear that. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to calm himself down. It was okay, maybe Sanji was temporarily deaf? Maybe he just couldn't hear for a while? Yeah, that'd be good … That'd be wonderful actually …

"Zoro?"

Fuck.

"Yeah?"

"You okay in there?"

 _Fuck him and his sexy voice— no, better not think about him and the word fuck …_

"Yeah, fine," he gasped, staring at the wall, splattered in his cum. "Just … cold water," he said, finally feeling himself numb slightly under the icy shower. Not like it had done him any good, the fantasies of Sanji were too hot to freeze, they melted the ice and now feeling it against his back, it was almost prickly, his hot skin trying to counteract the cold.

"You sure?"

"Absolutely," Zoro replied. He had just cum thinking about Sanji … thinking about Sanji fucking him … Oh God … Did his voice sound hoarse? Did he sound like he was choking? Water, he needed water, right? "You can go back to the living room," Zoro said. "I'll come out when I'm done." Zoro nearly winced. Horrible choice of words.

"You're certain?"

"Yes I'm fucking certain Sanji, now fucking go," Zoro hissed, uncertain how long he could remain calm with thoughts of Sanji sticking two fingers up Zoro's ass circling in his head.

"Okay," Sanji said in a quiet voice.

"Fuck no, I didn't mean it like that," Zoro said quickly. "I'm tired," he lied. "I uh … I …" If he was bad at words when he was face to face with Sanji, he felt as though he was worse when there was a door separating them.

"Zoro," said Sanji slowly, "you wouldn't happen to be uh … _relieving_ yourself would you?" He didn't sound mocking, rather, he sounded shy, confused and genuinely curious.

Zoro gritted his teeth. "Are you fucking kidding me? I'm not that desperate!"

God hearing Sanji's voice … hearing his voice was just getting him hard again. Well wasn't this fucking fantastic? He took a deep breath. In all honesty, Sanji had seem him at worse points, hadn't he? He had seen him bleeding profusely, seen him go down on him, seen him on bad days when he didn't give a fuck what other people thought. He bit his lip, knowing he was going to regret this. "But … say, hypothetically I was …"

He heard a sharp intake of breath from the other side of the door. "Zoro …"

"What … what would you say?" Zoro closed his eyes tightly, his fist hitting the wall as he tried to steady himself on his feet. He wasn't going to freak out, he wasn't going to act stupid …

There was silence and then—

"Hypothetically?"

"Yeah," Zoro replied, swallowing deeply. "Hypothetically."

"I … I would probably … help you out." Zoro could imagine Sanji's red face as he spoke.

"Believe me, you already are," Zoro whispered.

"What?"

"Nothing," Zoro said hurriedly. "Anyway, like I said, I'll get out when I'm done."

"Okay." It took a while, but after a few moments, he could hear Sanji's footsteps retreating.

"Fuck," Zoro whispered to himself. God his throat was dry, he needed a fucking drink. He stared across from him at the cum-splattered wall. Zoro remembered the taste of Sanji on his lips. It had tasted … interesting. A new, but not unpleasant taste. In fact … He licked his lips, staring at the cum as it slowly dripped down the wall. Did it all taste the same?

Without thinking about it, Zoro took a step closer to the wall and hesitantly poked out his tongue. He could taste it, but it was mostly water from the shower. He ran his tongue up along a tile. The cold feel of the tile combined with a strange mix of water and cum …

Fuck he wouldn't be leaving the shower in a while, would he?

* * *

"You were in for a while," Sanji said when Zoro finally stepped back into the living room.

Zoro nodded and ran his hands through his wet hair. "Made something?" he asked gesturing towards the food.

"Yeah," Sanji replied. His eyes seemed to trail up and down Zoro. He licked his lips. "If you don't wash your hair, you'll get sick."

"Ahou, don't you remember? Idiots don't get sick," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. He pulled out a chair and took a seat at the table.

"Are you admitting to being stupid?"

"Maybe …"

Sanji laughed and put the food on the table. Then there was the sound of a towel being hit against the counter and that was the only warning before it covered Zoro's eyes.

"Hey, what the fuck do you think you're doing?!" Zoro demanded.

"Drying your hair, dumbass," Sanji said.

It was like getting a massage for his head and Zoro had never been massaged before. He swore, Sanji had magical fingers. The towel roughly seemed to pull at his hair, yanking and grabbing, but Zoro found he liked a little pain in his pleasure. He was a masochist, wasn't he? As Sanji's fingers brushed his scalp, Zoro couldn't keep in a sigh.

"Liking it, Marimo?"

"You wish, cook."

Sanji smirked. "So I was thinking we could have a TV dinner, watch some more _Naruto_ while we eat. I made some ramen for the occasion."

"Miso?"

"What else?"

Zoro smirked and stood up. "I'll wait on the couch, I guess," Zoro said. He took a seat on the couch and stared at the TV screen, black at the moment.

He was pretty sure there was problem with how much he personally thought Sanji reminded him of Naruto. Of course, Sanji wasn't a hyper-ball of energy with an evil demon inside of him. He didn't have an obsession with ramen (as far as he knew), he didn't live alone and didn't turn himself into a sexy naked girl, censored only by vague clouds in very convenient places. But there was something about him that reminded Zoro of Sanji.

Maybe it was the bright blue eyes. The way Naruto seemed to stick out like a sore thumb in a crowd with his orange jumpsuit and his blond hair. All the other characters seemed to have a dark colour pallet whereas Naruto just seemed to shine with bright colours. His messy hair, his annoying way of talking, he was different. He was in pain, but he never showed it, he buried it deep and pretended that it didn't exist, that he was fine, that he was normal and if someone found out about his secret, he would surely collapse, surely fall apart. His own inner-demons stopping him from reaching his full potential, keeping him from being as carefree as he pretended to be. He himself could barely handle the secret. A facade. Every day, every second of every moment of his life.

Zoro glanced towards the kitchen where Sanji was pouring some ramen into a bowl.

Just like Sanji.

"Okay, two episodes down, two-hundred eighteen to go."

"WHAT?!" Zoro leaned back on the couch. "You have to devote your entire life to this thing, it's time consuming." He shook his head. "It's a miracle you have a life with this anime obsession," he muttered.

"There's two hundred twenty episodes to _Naruto_ , but _Naruto Shippuden_ has four hundred twenty—"

"Oh fuck no," Zoro interrupted him. "He's cool, but he's not _that_ cool. There's no way I'm wasting my life watching over seven hundred episodes of that hyper-active bouncy ball—"

"It's not seven hundred episodes," Sanji told him, "it's like, six hundred fifty, around," he said, shaking his head. "Anyway, we're on to episode three."

" _Sasuke or Sakura, Friends or Foes?_ " Zoro read the episode name. "Fuck this guy's dramatic. Why are all of the episode names so damn long?" He paused. "Wait, isn't Sakura that girl with the crazy pink hair and big forehead?"

"That's her."

"And Sasuke …?"

"Her crush," Sanji said. "Look, you'll see, just watch."

The episode started.

"Why does he sleep with that hat on? He looks stupid like that. And why's he such a pervert?"

"Naruto isn't a pervert, Jiraiya's a pervert," Sanji said.

"Who's Jiraiya?"

"You'll meet him later."

"But what kind of person who isn't a pervert owns a calendar like that?" Zoro asked. "I mean seriously, and he was going through what looked like the porn section of that magazine store an episode ago!" He shook his head. "That's unbelievable. He's such a hentai!"

"I know a pervert doesn't own that kind of calendar," Sanji mused.

"Oh yeah?" Zoro challenged. "Who?"

"You."

"I'M NOT A FUCKING PERVERT!"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You're going to miss everything if you keep talking," he told him.

"I think that milk's expired," Zoro noted watching as Naruto took a big gulp out of the carton. He wanted to say it was gross to drink out of the carton, but to be honest, he kinda did it too so ….

As the show went on, Zoro could admit Naruto wasn't the only blond, but that Ino girl had really pale weird-ass looking hair. It was almost like she was albino in Zoro's opinion. He watched, rolling his eyes as the girls fought to be in the class first. The second Naruto started to look stupid, he realized there was a love-triangle problem. Naruto liked Sakura, Sakura liked Sasuke— oh so Sasuke was the guy with the duck-butt hair? But either way, Sasuke didn't seem to like anyone.

And then—

"Did … did they just _kiss_?"

Zoro frowned. _Naruto_ was under the shōunen category, right? That meant there was very little romance. He had never expected shōunen to encourage gay romance.

"Hey Zoro?" asked Sanji in a quiet voice.

"Hmm?"

Sanji bit his lip and paused the episode. "I … I want to try something."

"What?" Zoro asked, looking at Sanji strangely.

"I uh … I got bored so I started to look through the Internet," Sanji said slowly. "And I uh came across something interesting …"

Zoro blinked. "Did you find porn?"

"Fuck no!" Sanji said hurriedly, "It wasn't anything like that." He was blushing really harshly. "It was just this video on YouTube …" He trailed off, turning his head away from Zoro. Sanji cleared his throat. "It uh … There were people who were … they were doing this … reenactment thing from movies."

"Oh yeah?" Zoro rearranged himself on the couch so he was more comfortable.

"I was wondering if … we could try it. With anime, I mean. Reenact something from an anime."

"Well if you want me to copy those facial expressions, I can't," Zoro said with a laugh. "Why are you so red? Come on, what were they reenacting?"

Sanji blushed. "Um, they were …" He twiddled with his thumbs, putting his bowl of ramen down. His leg was tapping on the floor, an insistent beat to something unknown. "They were reenacting … kiss scenes …"

Zoro's eyes widened. That was something he had not been expecting. Sanji didn't seem like the experimenting type, the kind who liked to try to do other things to "spice up" the relationship. Considering his past with the cooks, Zoro still found it amazing they had gone as far as they had.

"Oh." Zoro cleared his throat awkwardly. "You sure you want to do it?" he asked. "I don't mind, if you want."

Sanji bit his lip. "Yeah …"

Zoro feel back into the couch again. "Alright. So uh, did you have a scene in mind?"

Sanji turned even redder. "Well uh …"

"Because unless you're watching hentai, I haven't seen any kisses in any of the anime you watch," Zoro said. "And I don't think hentai has much mouth to mouth contact anyway. Maybe mouth to dick, but …" He trailed off.

"Yeah, I had a scene in mind," Sanji said.

Zoro's eyes widened as realization slowly dawned on him. "You want to … try that?" he asked, gesturing towards the screen.

Sanji blushed. "I mean … It's an interesting angle," he said. Oh, his ears were turning red. "And really it's just pretty quick, right? Just fast, maybe two seconds and then you can gag."

Zoro let out a soft chuckle. "Sanji," he said softly, "I don't think there's anyway you could kiss me that'd make me gag."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "We don't have to—"

"I'll do it," Zoro said. "Besides … I bet you'd make orange look fucking sexy."

Sanji blushed even more. "I …"

"Come on, I think I can find something emo in my closet. Bet I could find a big orange shirt in there somewhere too. Don't know about pants though …" He trailed off. "Or, we could just do it as we are now. Unless you really want to try the cosplay."

Sanji blushed. "No, that's fine. Just … giving it a shot."

"Is the kitchen clean?" Zoro asked. "I don't think I have another counter with a good height." _How many shades can I turn him?_ Zoro continued to keep his "professional" manner facade up.

"Wait," Sanji said. "But that'd be … that'd be mistreatment of kitchen equipment. To sit on a counter—"

"Sanji, tell me something," said Zoro with a deadly serious tone. "Can you put the counter in a drawer?" Sanji shook his head. "In a cupboard?" Sanji shook his head again. "How about the dishwasher?" Sanji rolled his eyes, as though it were obvious. "Under the sink?" Another shake of the head. "Can you hold a counter in your hand?"

"You're saying stupid things," Sanji told him.

"So we agree? You can't put the counter anywhere other than the floor, right? That means it's not equipment, it's furniture, it's furniture that just so happens to be in the kitchen, but furniture none the less. Would you prefer we go out on the porch? You can hang from the windowsill, potentially fall backwards, crash through the glass and give me another heart attack if you want."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Fine, we'll use the kitchen."

Zoro grinned.

* * *

Zoro pushed the kitchen table closer to the island in the centre of the kitchen. He then took a seat at the table, laying his elbows on the table, clasping his hands together and tried to scowl. Being this Sasuke person was hard, he was ridiculously moody.

Sanji seemed reluctant to get up on the counter, but he did, squatting forward.

Both men failed at looking upset.

Regardless, Sanji pushed himself slightly forward and their lips connected.

Zoro wrapped an arm around Sanji, scared for his footing and pulled him closer. Because of the table between them, Sanji ended up on his knees on the table. He tried to pull away after the "two seconds and gag", but Zoro grabbed him by his tie and kept him in place. He practically climbed onto the table himself, keeping Sanji in a tight lip-lock, tasting the spicy, bitterness on his lips.

Perhaps he was just one of those people who preferred sour to sweet.

Sanji gasped and Zoro invaded, using the hand that wasn't on his tie to run his fingers through Sanji's hair, guiding the blond closer to him. He heard the table creak from under him and slowly slid himself off the table, trying his best to keep contact while managing to get off the unstable table.

Zoro lost his balance and fell, Sanji falling on top of him.

He gasped, catching his breath. The floor was cold, but Sanji was warm on top of him. He ran his fingers through the stands of Sanji's hair, smiling. God he loved this man.

He captured his lips again, letting his hands roam to Sanji's hips, holding him in place on top of him. Being with Sanji was hard enough, he didn't need the blond rubbing up against him to make things harder. Or rather, to make _it_ harder.

"Zoro," Sanji gasped. Zoro's lips moved to the blond's neck. God he loved hearing his voice. He loved hearing his name come from those delicious lips, hear the sounds he made … He bit down on Sanji's pulse point and the cook jerked, a shiver running through his body.

"Hmm?" Zoro mumbled, letting his finger trace over Sanji's hipbones.

"I …" Sanji sucked in a deep breath. "I want to do it."

Zoro froze and slowly detached himself from the blond. "W-what?"

Sanji met his gaze fiercely, his crystal blue eye showing no hint of doubt. "I want you to fuck me, Zoro."

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _Cara-Dolce : Okay, you're right, you've never reviewed before, but I'm glad you took the time to do it now! Since you said you didn't want the answer, then I guess I won't give it, so ... Yeah. Anyway, I'm really happy you like this story so much! It's my first endeavour into the **One Piece** archive and I never expected such a good response. I think I've only gotten one real complaint about it. So thank you and I hope you may review more later on!_

 _mandacub : I do love making people feel embarrassed, it's a secret joy of mine._

 _lilcutieprincess : I just remember watching **Naruto** for the first time, seeing the sexy-jutsu and going, "Um ... okay, damn!" I also remember learning about **Ranma 1/2** and then people were like, "no one's ever turn themselves into a different sex before!" Which one came first? **Ranma** or **Naruto**? I'm not sure. I think I got new respect for the sexy-jutsu from the harem jutsu. Gotta love him!_

 _Random Person : Spanish class last year ... my teacher thought she could teach us Spanish through quizlet alone. I'm wincing at the memories._

 _JustCallMeLucie : As I've stated before, I've never had an addiction to nicotine, but I do replace bad habit with slightly less bad habits. I'll be honest, i don't know how to get over addictions like the ones Sanji's trying to get over and I know it takes more time than this story seems to be hinting at, but I'm pretty satisfied with the way it is. What Sanji doing isn't exactly getting over the addiction, I find he's burying it deeply inside of him and trying to ignore it more than confronting it and denying himself it. I'm no expert on the topic. If you're writing anything and you want someone to help you out on grammar and stuff, I did fill out a Beta form, but just in general, I'm fine with doing it. I'm a little harsh though, but my friends appreciate my blunt honesty. Well that, or they want to kill me slowly and painfully._

 _Michikuni Mayu : Thanks for the correction, I swear I'm better at French verbally. I'm really good at having a French conversation, and I can read French books, I just can't write that well... Something I love about the screwed up English language: we don't have genres for our words. Yeah, I feel as though Sanji's been thinking about it a lot, about what it would've been like if it had been Zoro, but I bet he's also wondering if he'd have even been interested in him, especially since he was sure he was straight before._

 _Shizuka Taiyou: I feel like Zoro and Rock Lee would hate each other, but respect each other's dedication towards training. Zoro's got a thing with eyebrows and Rock Lee doesn't really help that matter, does he? I sometimes like to think what some characters would do if they interacted with other anime characters, like Zoro and Ichigo would they compare swords? Though I think Jiraiya and Sanji would butt heads, loving women but Jiraiya's a bit too perverted._

 _Okay here's what Zoro said: **"If you could understand me, you'd have no doubt that you're beautiful in my eyes. You'd know that I love you, but unfortunately, you don't know."**_

 _ **QUESTION TIME! Do you think Sanji and Zoro have a healthy relationship? Take into account the fact that Sanji was reluctant to accept Zoro's help, Zoro abducted him, put him on shit-apartment-arrest for almost a month, Sanji's being "forced" to cook for Zoro, and other factors. Do you think it's a healthy relationship? Is it become a healthy relationship?**_


	34. You Do Me

_**Author's Note:** I don't think anyone will ever understand how much I've been stressing over this chapter. So, if you guys didn't know, I like to write chapters in advance so that I always have something to update. That stream's been broken thanks to this chapter so the next updates will come slower cause of reasons other than school. I like to have two chapters written in advance of the chapter I've published, so say I update chapter 30, I want chapters 31 and 32 written ahead of time. So when chapter 30 was being written, this thing was already a work in progress. I wrote the beginning of the sex scene in advance and kept editing it and fusing over it and God, I'm not a man, I don't know how this works, to be dreadfully honest. I've been working on this chapter for at least a week and God, it's been killing me. I really hope I didn't screw this up. So here's the thing: I wrote this chapter, it took me a long time, it took a lot of thinking, stuff went down. Now, I don't want people telling me this is unrealistic because frankly, this is what I think sex should be like. Consensual, communications between both parties, a little bit messy and nervous, especially if its your first time. I don't own **One Piece**. I'm sure they'll get better at doing this the longer they do it. So I didn't use anything to separate the smut and the story, or else you'd be missing like, the whole chapter. You don't need to read it, I guess, but I like this chapter because it really shows trust on both sides, Sanji in trusting Zoro enough to have sex with him, and Zoro to let Sanji "dominate" him._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **There's sex. It's finally happened, they have sex. Also, if you don't like Sanji on top, don't read it. (This story has both SanZo and ZoSan, so Zoro topping WILL come. Eventually)**

* * *

Chapter 34: You Do Me

* * *

The silence that met Sanji's ears was almost unbearable. God maybe he shouldn't have said that and yet he couldn't find it within himself to take it back. He didn't regret it, not in the least to his surprise. Instead, he blinked and tried his hardest not to look as nervous as he felt.

"W-what?" Zoro repeated.

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "I'm ready. For sex."

Zoro shook his head. "No, you're just crazy, no _I'm_ crazy. You didn't just say that, that'd be ridiculous," Zoro said, biting his bottom lip, as though mirroring Sanji. "You're just very, _very_ confused. You're in the heat of the moment, you don't actually mean it." The swordsman ran his fingers through his hair frantically. "Am I dreaming? I must be, I'm so desperate, I'm dreaming," Zoro muttered to himself. He got off of Sanji and began to pace around the kitchen. "This isn't real, I'm dreaming, surely, I'm totally dreaming …"

"Zoro," Sanji said slowly. "do you … not want to?"

Zoro let out a chuckle. "Do I not want to have sex with you? God that's like asking me if the sky's blue."

"Technically, the sky's blue because of reflection—"

"Shhh," Zoro said softly, "you're a cook, you don't need brains." He sighed, pulling at his collar. "No, it's not a matter of whether or not I want to have sex, it's whether or not _you_ want to have sex. Even if this _is_ real, which is fucked up, you're not ready."

"How the fuck are you supposed to know whether or not I'm ready?" Sanji snapped.

"You were raped!" Zoro screamed. "You think you're over it that quickly? Fuck no, that's not how it happens!"

"It's been six months," Sanji said. "I'm not going to say something stupid like I'm over it, fuck no, I'm not. I don't think I'll ever be," he admitted in a soft voice. "But … I trust you and I know you're not like that."

"Do you understand what you're asking from me?" Zoro asked him, his tone dropping. "Do you have any idea what you're handing over to me?"

"What, my body, mind and soul?" Sanji snorted. "Sex isn't a big deal—"

"But it _is_ Sanji," Zoro said, holding him by his shoulders gently. "It is a big deal. A massive one." Zoro shook his head. "It's … sex is … sex is one of the most intimate acts you can possibly perform with another person. In some cultures, I think it's considered sacred. You don't just hand your body over to just anyone."

"But you're not just anyone," Sanji protested. "I said it before, didn't I? I trust you."

Zoro gnawed at his bottom lip. "Sanji, look me in the eyes ant tell me the truth. Do you want to have sex with me?"

Sanji blushed and turned his head away. "Could you be more embarrassing, Marimo?" he snapped but there was no bite in his bark.

"Answer the question," Zoro said. "Look me in the eyes and tell me to my face that you wouldn't regret it."

"Would you?" It was quiet, a soft voice. Sanji was hoping Zoro hadn't heard but of course, he had.

"Never," he whispered. "I'll tell you the truth Sanji. I've slept with a total of three people in my life. Each and every time I did it, I thought about it. I thought about whether or not it was what I wanted and each time I did it I decided it was what I wanted. I'm not going to lie, I've had a few … proposals from some customers of Partys, but I've never taken up any of their offers. Sanji, sex is a big deal, whether or not you think it is, that doesn't change the fact that if we do this … It's something we can't go back on. It's a different kind of intimacy, one that can't be taken back." Zoro checked his watch. "Right now it's nearly eleven. I'm going to give you twenty-four hours. Think about it, _really_ think about it Sanji and then tell me your decision. If you decide you don't want it, I'm okay with that. But I'm not okay with you saying yes in the heat of the moment and regretting it later, understood?"

"When did you get all grown up?" Sanji asked teasingly.

"Sanji, I'm serious."

"I know," he replied softly.

"Think about it, okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

"I've thought about it."

Zoro looked up from his bed. He nodded, waiting for Sanji's answer. The blond wasn't sure if the swordsman wanted to seem anxious, but Sanji could see the way Zoro's foot seemed to be twitching.

Sanji took a deep breath. "I still want to do it."

"Sanji, we don't have to do this," Zoro reminded him, sitting up on his bed. "I don't want you to feel like I'm forcing you into anything, because I'm not. If you're not ready, then we won't do it. Simple."

Sanji shook his head. He wasn't backing away. He wanted Zoro, he really did, and he knew that Zoro wanted him too. At least, he wanted him so far. Perhaps once Sanji came back to his senses and realized how hideous he was, Zoro would too and then— _no, we're not thinking about that. Focus on Zoro, only Zoro. You can do this._ "No, I want to," Sanji insisted. "I really do."

Zoro gave him a disbelieving look but nodded slowly. "Okay," he agreed. "But …"

"But what?" Sanji asked, fear coursing through him. Was he no good? Because he had already been used by those bastard cooks, did Zoro not want him anymore? Was he interested only because Sanji wouldn't give and now the blond had lost his only appeal towards the swordsman? Was it because he ate three slices of pizza? Fuck, it was because of that, wasn't it? He hadn't even been that hungry, but he couldn't waste food and now it was going to cost him—

"Sanji, stop freaking out!"

The blond was brought back to reality as the green-haired man stared at him with a crease in his brow. He was worried. "Whatever you're thinking right now, or whatever you were thinking about, it probably has nothing to do with what I'm thinking. Now, I'm going to repeat my question, since you didn't seem to hear me the first time, okay? Try to stay on Earth this time around, alright?"

Sanji nodded, slightly offended.

"For our first time, do you want to swap?"

"Huh?"

"Positions," Zoro clarified. "Because since I know you have so many bad memories with being … underneath someone, I thought maybe we could switch roles. I don't want you to regret our first time, Sanji. I don't want you to have any more horrible memories about this because sex isn't a bad thing, it isn't. You have to know it's not always the way those bastards did it. I don't want you thinking that's the only way someone can have sex, it can be good too. I want it to be good for you, Sanji, so if you want … I'm willing to put aside my pride and let you take control. If you want, that is."

Sanji stared at Zoro, open mouthed. He couldn't understand. Though they had never spoken about it before, it was almost natural to assume that Sanji would be the one on the bottom. He was the one with the leaner body, he was the one who seemed more vulnerable, he was the one with the thinner frame. Almost everything about Sanji seemed to say that he should be the one on the receiving end, but here was Zoro, dignified, prideful Zoro, offering himself instead of Sanji, so that he could experience something different.

Sanji wanted to tell Zoro that no, he was fine with being on the bottom. He was okay with it because it was Zoro and it wasn't one of those bastard cooks, but he couldn't. His tongue wouldn't work. Though Sanji wanted it, he _really_ wanted it, he couldn't quite make himself willing to submit to Zoro. To give someone that control over you, to allow them to dominate you, Sanji was scared sick at the thought of it. It wasn't that he didn't trust Zoro, he did, with his life, but this was something different. This was something he wasn't sure he trusted anyone with, his body was precious to him, especially since it had been violated. He was more aware of himself than ever before and he wasn't sure if he was ready for Zoro to see him like that.

"Yes," Sanji finally said quietly. "Yes, I want to switch."

He was scared Zoro would back out then. That Zoro had only offered to make Sanji feel better and was actually sickened by the idea of taking it up the ass from Sanji. But the swordsman just nodded and gave him a small smile.

"Okay."

Sanji let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

It was awkward, that Sanji could admit. He didn't know where to put his hands, or how he was supposed to deal with the slight height difference between them, but Zoro seemed to be calm, cool and collected. Zoro stood up from the bed and walked over to him, before leaning down and capturing Sanji's lips, pressing against them lightly but making no move to deepen the kiss.

Sanji's arms wrapped around Zoro's neck, pulling him closer and hesitantly, his tongue swept across the swordsman's bottom lip. Zoro let a small groan escape and his hands ran through Sanji's hair. His grip wasn't tight, he wasn't even holding onto him. Sanji felt safe. Secure.

The cook lowered his mouth from Zoro's and he couldn't help the smirk when he heard Zoro let out a small whine. His lips skimmed over the swordsman's neck, lightly and ghosting slightly. He left small kisses, going on instinct rather that knowledge. His tongue swept over Zoro's Adam's apple and he sucked gently on the junction between Zoro's neck and shoulder-blade. "Sanji," said Zoro in a soft, barely audible voice. "Shit, what are you doing?"

"No idea," Sanji admitted, letting his lips trail to the dip in Zoro's shirt, pulling down at it slightly. This man's body was incredible. The grooves and dips were … Sanji couldn't find words to describe it. He just knew that this was the one who he wished had been his first time, in every sense. But it felt like a do-over, as though he had a chance to start over again and pretend the past didn't exist. He let his tongue drag along Zoro's collarbone and then further down to his broad shoulders.

"Bed," Zoro gasped out, pulling Sanji with him to the soft sheets of Zoro's ridiculously large bed.

 _Has he ever been in here with other women?_ Sanji couldn't help wondering. _Has he ever done it here with someone else?_

"Hey," Zoro said in a soft voice, "Sanji, look at me."

Sanji let his gaze meet the hazel-eyed swordsman. Grey and the lightest trace of brown … Amazing eyes, really.

"It's just you and me right now."

"Just you and me," Sanji repeated. He nodded, feeling his Adam's apple bob. "Okay."

They laid down on the bed and Sanji propped himself up on his elbow. He leaned forward and kissed Zoro. It was amazing, how easily Zoro let himself go, letting Sanji take control of his mouth and yet he was responsive. The sounds he was making, they weren't as loud as Sanji, but they escaped his lips anyway, more subtle than Sanji's moans and made him feel reassured.

He let his hand wander underneath Zoro's shirt, feeling his stomach muscles under his fingers. Zoro pulled away from him and Sanji bit his bottom lip. Was he bad at this? Did Zoro not want it anymore? Instead, the swordsman was lifting his shirt over his head and tossing it to the side. He gave Sanji a small smile. "It's a bit hot in here, isn't it?" he joked.

"Lay on your back," Sanji said and Zoro obeyed. _Zoro_ fucking obeyed _him_. It was … it was so _different_ , to be in control. The swordsman didn't fight him for anything and laid himself out on his back, giving Sanji a smirk.

The strangest thing about it though, was that despite the fact that Sanji was in control, despite the fact that Zoro obeyed him, despite the fact that Sanji was "dominating" him, it didn't feel that way. There was no doubt that the swordsman wasn't arguing as Sanji's trembling hands ran over his muscles, feeling his hot skin under his fingertips, but he didn't feel like he was making Zoro surrender, like Zoro was powerless. Just because Zoro wasn't fighting didn't mean he was submitting, the power level felt equal. This was … this was what consent was, wasn't it?

"Tell me … tell me if you don't like something," Sanji told him softly.

"No worries cook," Zoro said.

The tension that coiled in the pit of Sanji's stomach was almost instantly released.

He leaned down and started to leave small kisses along Zoro's chest, letting his thumb rub gently against his nipple. The swordsman gasped, the nipple hardening under Sanji's thumb. He moved lowered on Zoro's chest and gave him a hesitant look before he gently took the nipple in his mouth.

Zoro's eyes widened and he gripped the sheets. "Fuck," he muttered in a raspy voice.

"Is it good?" Sanji asked, taking his mouth off.

Zoro blushed. "Yeah … I … I like it."

Sanji took his nipple back in his mouth, sucking gently. With one hand pressed against Zoro's chest, trying to memorize every scar, all the places that made him sigh, his other lowered to Zoro's cock, gently stroking him through his pants.

"Y-you're sure you've never done this— ah shit! Done this before?" Zoro asked, thrusting up into Sanji's hand.

Sanji shook his head and moved up Zoro's chest, kissing him. His hand was at an awkward angle, he could admit that, it felt weird, but Zoro was letting out the sweetest sounds so it didn't bother him too much. He palmed the nipple that had been in his mouth previously and Zoro moaned into his mouth, his hips bucking forward.

Experimentally, Sanji pinched his nipple.

"Fuck," Zoro said, turning his head away from Sanji's lips. He was breathing hard, his chest heaving. Sanji could feel his heart beat under his palm, fast and erratic.

Sanji eyed the three earrings on Zoro's left ear. He took one of the hoops into his mouth and gently tugged. Zoro let out a slight hiss. "It's … sensitive," Zoro admitted. "Just a bit."

Sanji smirked. He licked the shell of Zoro's ear and listened as the swordsman sucked in a breath. He tugged at the hoops once more and Zoro groaned. "I swear, if you keep doing that, I might cum before we start."

Sanji smirked. "Do you have an ear fetish?"

"No," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "Do you?"

"No," Sanji replied. "But I might have one with piercings." He laughed at the look on Zoro's face and before Zoro could reply, he kissed him.

It was slow and soft. Sanji's hand tried to unbutton Zoro's pants and he quite personally found that zippers were the stupidest thing to ever exist as he tugged, never breaking the kiss. When he finally got it unzipped, he pulled Zoro's member out of his pants and started to stroke him slowly. Sanji smirked, whispering against Zoro's lips. "Going commando? Since when?"

Zoro gasped. "Fuck you've got talented fingers," he hissed.

"Zoro, I asked since when," Sanji said, squeezing his cock harshly.

Zoro's hips jerked forward. "Few days," he choked out in a husky voice. "Didn't … hah … want to ruin … ah … them."

"That so?" Sanji teased. "How'd you ruin them?"

"Fuck you," Zoro said hoarsely. "You know how, bastard." He thrust upwards, trying to meet Sanji's strokes, but Sanji let go of him. Zoro whimpered. He actually _whimpered_. "Why are you wearing so many clothes?" he demanded, pulling at Sanji's tie.

Sanji pulled off of him, sitting on his knees, his legs spread out. He was going to undo his tie when he saw the way Zoro was watching him. It felt as though Zoro was undressing him with his eyes and from the way he was licking his lips, he liked what he saw. With a smirk, Sanji slowly pulled at the tie.

 _Fuck, I have no idea what I'm doing!_

 _Just go with it._

Slowly, he let the tie slip out of its knot. He pulled it loose and let it fall somewhere on the floor. With trembling hands, though he hoped Zoro didn't notice, he slowly undid the top button of his shirt. He tried not to think of what he looked like. Scarred arms, scarred wrists, bruised torso … Instead, he focused on his second button, letting it pop out slowly before moving down to his next one.

Zoro licked his lips, watching as slowly by slowly, more of Sanji's ivory skin was revealed.

When four buttons were undone and a fair amount of skin was exposed, Sanji stopped. He ran his fingers over his chest slowly, sensually.

 _Fuck, I_ ** _really_** _have no idea what I'm doing!_

But Zoro was getting even harder as Sanji's hands trailed over himself. He raised a hand to his mouth, licking his fingers before sucking on them softly, looking Zoro straight in the eyes. He let his tongue trail over his fingers before he inserted them in his mouth. He let his eyes roll just a bit, taking his fingers out of his mouth and letting them slide down his torso slowly, stopping at his crotch. He used a single hand to unbutton the last two remaining ones before he used that hand to rise up on his chest. He palmed his own nipple and let out a gasp, his head tossing back on instinct.

"Sanji …" Zoro's voice was hoarse, almost inaudible. He made a move to reach out to touch him, but Sanji pushed back.

He gently stroked himself, slowly. He imagined it being Zoro's hand, his tanned, callused fingers wrapping around his cock, stroking him while sucking on his chest, leaving hickeys and marks, making Sanji his and his alone. Sanji thrusted up into his own hand, letting out a sigh of satisfaction before stopping. He moved his hands back down to his pants, unbuttoning them and undoing his zipper.

"Fuck," Zoro hissed. He sent Sanji a smirk. "Has anyone ever told you you're fucking sexy, cook?"

Sanji smirked back at him and the knots in his stomach seemed to come undone. "First I've ever heard." He let his shirt fall off his shoulders and decided not to think about the wrinkles it wold surely have. "Is that better?" he asked. Zoro seemed to be focusing on his hips. Sanji knew his pants hung low on his waist.

Sanji pressed Zoro up against the headboard and kissed him, sitting in his lap. Their cocks were so close, only separated by the thin material of Sanji's boxers. Sanji invaded Zoro's mouth, gyrating against the swordsman's lap, feeling more confident then he had ever felt in his life.

"Sanji," Zoro gasped, grabbing Sanji's hips and thrusting harshly upwards. "Fuck, I need it."

Was Zoro … was Zoro Roronoa _begging_?

"Please," Zoro sighed into his mouth. Oh fuck, he was. "Fuck me, I need it, I need your cock, I need you." He thrust up again, moaning at the friction. "Fucking hell, fuck me with your big cock Sanji, please."

Sanji got harder, if possible. So he really did like dirty talk he supposed.

Sanji bit his lip. "Do you … do you have a condom?"

"Don't want one," Zoro said in a raspy voice, bucking against Sanji urgently. "There's lube in the nightstand drawer," he told him.

"But what about …" Sanji trailed off. It was an awkward conversation to have with Zoro, especially given the circumstances, but he knew about STDs, he didn't want one. Being in the hospital for his asthma and Zoro's stupidity was enough to last him a life time. He'd be fine if he never saw those nurses again, as pretty as they were. Besides, it'd be an awkward talk, admitting he got AIDS or something because he couldn't wait to have sex with his boyfriend.

"I'm clean," Zoro said. "And so are you. They wouldn't let you donate blood if it was contaminated," he assured him. "Besides the nicotine, I mean."

Sanji nodded slowly. "Sorry, I know this kinda ruins the mood—"

"Sanji," Zoro said in a deadly serious voice. "Look at me. I've been sexually deprived for what must be at least half a year. You're sexy as fuck, you've been leaving me hanging for at least two months and I feel like a horny teenager. Nothing you can do or say can stop me from wanting you right now."

Sanji gulped and turned his head away. The blush was rising on his cheeks and he felt like crying. The sincerity in Zoro's voice … He had never heard it so clearly before, had never seen such a look in the swordsman's eyes, had never wanted another human being the way he wanted Zoro. He nodded, biting back a sob. God he had never felt so happy in his life, that exposed this way, Zoro still wanted him, that he was still someone important to him, that he still mattered. That he mattered to Zoro.

"You'll … you'll need to stretch me," Zoro said, pulling Sanji out of his thoughts. He looked back at the green-haired man who was blushing, but it was clear from the look in his eyes that Zoro wanted it. He really, _really_ wanted it. He wanted Sanji.

Sanji climbed off of him opened the nightstand's drawer. Just as Zoro said, there was a bottle of lube. He moved down Zoro to his legs, tugging at his pants. Zoro lifted his hips, helping Sanji. They bunched up around his ankles. "Fucking hell, your legs are long," he complained, trying to untangle them to get them off.

Zoro chuckled. "Yours are longer."

"You're taller than me, remember?" Sanji reminded him when he finally got them off. He pushed them off the side of the bed and opened the bottle, trying not to shake too much. "Tell me if it hurts, okay?" he asked, squeezing out a fair amount on his hand.

"I can handle a little pain," Zoro said with a scoff.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Yeah sure, big guy."

Sanji was pretty sure that using logic, it was absolutely impossible to shove something as big as his cock into a hole that small. It wasn't that Sanji was huge, though he was larger than average, it was that the tight ring of muscle seemed too small for anything.

Biting his bottom lip, Sanji hesitantly started to slowly push in his index finger, stopping when he got to his first knuckle. He looked up at Zoro who was gritting his teeth. "You okay?"

"This is nothing," Zoro told him, rolling his eyes.

It was so tight inside of him and hot. He wondered if all of Zoro was just naturally above the normal temperature. His skin felt hot, inside of him felt hot, his mouth was hot, his kisses were … _No, not going there. Not right now_. He pushed a little harder, until his next knuckle, fighting against the resistance.

"Fuck you're tight," Sanji hissed. The lube helped a little but pulling it out with all the friction, it had to hurt, didn't it? No, he knew it hurt. It hurt a lot. "I'm going to pull it out now, okay?" he asked.

Zoro grunted. It felt as though his ass was trying to squeeze Sanji out, tightening around his finger as he slowly pulled it out until only the tip remained. "Are you okay?"

"Fine," Zoro said, though he looked as though he were in pain. "Just … it's a bit … uncomfortable." He squeezed his eyes tightly. "Move it around more," he suggested. "It'll probably hurt a bit less."

Sanji nodded, pushing his finger back in slowly. He saw the way Zoro clenched his teeth, fisted the sheets on either side of him. Wasn't pain a turn off for him? Sanji knew he couldn't stand it, but Zoro seemed to be getting harder. He leaned forward, over Zoro's chest and captured his lips with his.

"It's cold," Zoro said as Sanji continued to push his finger in and out of him slowly. Face to face Sanji could see the small beads of sweat that were building on his forehead. "The lube," he explained.

Sanji laughed. "You're just too hot," he replied, kissing him silent.

After a few more thrusts of his finger, Zoro seemed to be loosening up a bit. "I'm … I'm going to add another finger, okay?" Sanji asked, biting his lip nervously.

"Okay," Zoro told him. "Just … go slow."

Sanji nodded and slowly tried to insert another finger. It felt harder than before, with one of Sanji's fingers already inside of him, it was almost as though only one would fit and they were fighting for the space. Eventually though, he managed. Zoro gasped, grabbing Sanji's arm tightly, his nails digging into his forearm.

"Shit," he muttered.

"Sorry," Sanji apologized.

"No, it's okay," Zoro said slowly. "Just … give me a second."

Sanji waited as Zoro took several deep breaths and his grip on the cook began to ease up. "I'm alright."

Sanji nodded, but he was slow as he pulled his fingers out and slow at reinserting them. Zoro's breathing was deep, slightly uneven. His eyes were shut tightly as Sanji continued, letting out the occasional grunts. "You need to relax," Sanji told him softly. He could tell Zoro's body was clenching, trying to resist the intrusion. "You're too tense."

"I'm sorry, how about you try having someone's fingers shoved up your ass?" Zoro snapped at him, gritting his teeth.

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "They never did this," he said softly. "It was … it was worse. There was no preparation." He didn't like thinking about it, not now, not with Zoro, not while they were doing this. Zoro seemed to realize almost immediately and the look on his face clearly said he wanted to take his words back. "So don't fucking complain, okay? I'm trying my best here."

One of Zoro's hands that had been gripping the sheet reached up and pulled Sanji closer to him. Their foreheads pressed together, he took a few deep breaths. After a few moments, Sanji felt as though Zoro was a bit looser. He was still tight, but not as tight as before. "Like this?" he asked, his breath ghosting over Sanji's lips.

"Yeah," he said softly. "Just like that."

"I'm sorry," Zoro said quietly. Right now seemed to be a rather funny time for an apology in Sanji's opinion, but he supposed Zoro seemed to find it appropriate. "I wasn't thinking. I'm …" He closed his eyes, letting his hand run through Sanji's hair, then traveling to the base of his neck, keeping him steady. "I'm really grateful you're doing this." His tone was soft, gentle. "I'm really happy that you're doing this with me."

Sanji smirked. "Ahou, who else would I do it with?" He grinned, kissing Zoro softly. "Can I add another?"

Zoro sucked in a deep breath. "Okay."

Though Sanji knew Zoro was stretching since the first finger, it felt as though it was actually working when the third finger slipped in with more ease than the others. "Shit," Sanji hissed. "How are you so tight and hot?"

Zoro smirked and opened his mouth to say something when he suddenly grasped Sanji's hair tightly just as Sanji's fingers brushed against something, fisting it between his fingers. He let out a gasp, bucking his hips forward. "Fucking hell," he hissed.

Sanji stopped. "What … what is it? Did I hurt you?"

Zoro shook his head. "No, I think … I think that was my prostate." His grip on Sanji loosened and he let his hand fall back onto the bed.

"Here?" Sanji asked, feeling around a bit.

"No— ah fuck, _there_!"

So that's what that lump was. Well, it seemed as though Zoro liked it from the way he was panting. "You mean here?" Sanji hit Zoro's prostate and the swordsman gasped loudly.

"Fuck yes," he moaned. "Harder, Sanji, please, harder!"

Sanji's fingers moved in and out of Zoro at a slightly increased pace. He kept his eyes locked on Zoro's face, watching his reactions, memorizing them. The way his lips made an "O" when Sanji just brushed against his prostate to when a string of curse words came out in a hurried rush when he hit it.

Slowly, Sanji pulled his fingers out.

"Shit, no," Zoro whimpered.

Sanji smirked. "You want it, slut?" It surprised him, hearing someone say the word "slut", or "whore" made him uncomfortable however he felt nothing but arousal saying it to Zoro. Perhaps there was a secret about it, maybe Sanji was fine with these words as long as they weren't directed at him.

He pulled off his pants and let them pool up on the floor, shedding his boxers at the same time. He leaned over Zoro, rubbing against him, bare skin against bare skin. They both let out a moan that did nothing but go straight to their cocks. He rubbed his member against Zoro's and the swordsman kept bucking his hips forwards.

"Shit," Sanji hissed. "I really want to fuck you."

"Then do it," Zoro told him.

Sanji bit his lip. "But … won't I hurt you?"

"I don't fucking care, cook," Zoro told him, sending him a glare.

Sanji nodded. "Okay."

He took the lube and covered his cock in it. "Do you want it slow? Or all in one one?"

"All at once," Zoro said. "Fuck, hurry up!"

"You're a needy bitch, did you know?" Sanji teased.

Lining himself up with Zoro's hole, he braced himself before sinking himself deep inside of the swordsman.

"FUCK!"

Only one thought went through Sanji's head:

 _Don't cum, don't cum._

God it was so fucking _tight_ inside of Zoro, his walls clenched around Sanji like a vice, his insides hot and squeezing him. He swore he'd blow his load in a few seconds if Zoro kept clenching onto his cock like that.

"Relax," he snapped at him. "You're too fucking tight!"

He could hear Zoro's breathing as he tried to calm it down. "Give me a second," he hissed. "You're not fucking small you know."

Sanji waited. He clenched his teeth, trying his hardest not to cum. Zoro was just so fucking tight he was scared he'd blow it before they even started. Zoro let out a gasp. "Okay."

Slowly, painfully slowly, Sanji began to pull out. He could feel Zoro squeezing him, practically sucking him out. His entire body shuddered as he held his breath, listening to Zoro's breathing. He looked at him, watched his facial expressions.

Zoro sucked in a deep breath and his eyes were closed. He was gnawing at his bottom lip, his fists were gripping the sheets. "Breathe," Sanji told him softly.

"You don't think … hah … I'm fucking trying to?" Zoro snapped at him. "Fucking hell you're big …"

"You're just tight," Sanji told him. "Can I move again?"

Zoro nodded.

As Sanji pushed back in, he saw the way Zoro held his breath then let it out in time with Sanji's slow thrusts. His grip on the sheets was tightening. "Holy shit," he muttered. He could feel Zoro relaxing with each slow thrust until it wasn't as hard to move anymore. "Christ, Sanji …"

Sanji put his hands on Zoro's hips, pushing forward slightly. Zoro grabbed one of his arms and met his eyes. It felt as though electricity was shooting through his veins as Zoro's unwavering gaze watched him as he continued to thrust into him. Sanji was so close, but to lose it before Zoro … well, everything was a competition with them, wasn't it?

He took Zoro's cock in hand and began to stroke him slowly, timing it with his thrusts.

Zoro shuddered. "Fuck," he hissed, using his other hand to pull Sanji closer to him. "I'm close," he admitted, "God …" Zoro bit his bottom lip. "Faster?"

Sanji wasn't sure how fast he could go, considering Zoro's walls seemed to be clenching around him he wasn't sure how long he could hold it. Still, he pushed himself forward and pulled out, hearing Zoro let out a moan.

It didn't take long, though Sanji would've preferred if he had more control over his own body. Zoro tightened around him again and he came, just a second before Sanji came undone as well.

Sanji hadn't known that sex was so tiring. He pulled out, watching as the cum seemed to leak out of Zoro, dripping onto the sheets. He was going to grab his pants and put them back on when he felt an arm encircle around his waist, pulling him back onto the bed.

"Stay," Zoro said softly.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "I feel dirty now—"

"We'll shower later," Zoro assured him. "You're tired, right?"

"Well … yeah, but—"

"But nothing, if you don't go to sleep right now, I'll make you."

Sanji smirked. "Oh really?"

"Really."

Sanji sighed. "Well now I suppose I have to stay."

He climbed under the covers, pulling them up to his chest. Zoro's sheets were so warm, if not a bit wet. Though they had just done "the deed", or whatever people called it these days, it didn't stop him from feeling beyond self-conscious. He pulled his legs up and practically tucked his head in his knees. He was literally naked and bare for Zoro's eyes to see and it made him feel beyond uncomfortable. Or rather, it wasn't that he was uncomfortable, more like he felt safe, which was what made him uncomfortable.

Zoro laid beside him, facing him. He let his hands travel up and down Sanji's arm slowly. He felt goosebumps arise as Zoro pierced him with his fierce gaze. "That was …" The swordsman paused, as though searching for a word for it.

Zoro had been with women before, surely, which meant he was always in control. What if Sanji was bad? He had cum pretty quickly … But Zoro had never done something like this before, so maybe— _or it was so bad he doesn't ever want to do it again._

"What are you thinking about?" Zoro asked him.

Sanji blurted out the first thing he could think of that wasn't what was currently on his mind. "Why don't you touch me? My chest, I mean."

"I do," Zoro said, staring at him confused.

"You don't do it often," Sanji said.

"Oh yeah? Would you prefer if I did?"

"It's not that," Sanji said, feeling embarrassed. Strangely enough throughout the entire act of sex itself, all of Sanji's embarrassment seemed to have disappeared. Sure, he was nervous as hell, he was anxious, but he didn't feel embarrassed. Now it was all coming back to him. "Just …"

"Sanji, if I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times. _Tu es beau._ You're beautiful." Zoro shook his head. "How many times do I have to say it before you believe me?" He sighed, but it wasn't one of those exasperated sighs that one gave when they were on the brink of giving up. Rather, it was one of those exaggerated sighs you gave someone to tease them. "I guess I'll just have to keep proving it to you. You don't need to be so insecure."

"Can you blame me?"

Zoro shook his head, letting his hand wander down Sanji's arm to his hand, lacing his fingers through his. "Listen," he said softly. "Whatever you think of your scars, I love them. I don't like how you got them …" He eyed Sanji's wrist. "But I do love them. They're not ugly Sanji, they aren't. They're battle scars. They're proof that you've survived, that you're strong. You're a warrior."

"Actually, I believe I'm a cook."

Zoro gave him a gentle push. "You know what I'm talking about."

"Yeah. I do."

Zoro took a moment of pause before he spoke again. "The reason why I don't touch your chest … well, my reason's two fold. One being that when you're with women, they like to think that they're part of a whole, that one part of them doesn't over-fascinate their partner than another. So I've gotten used to ignoring the chest in general, so that someone doesn't tell me that I'm just there for their rack. You don't have a rack, but old habits die hard." He smirked. "As for my second reason … I didn't think you wanted me to."

Sanji gave him a strange look. "Why?"

Zoro propped himself up on his elbow. "Well I mean … you're always so worried about these things. You're more comfortable with exposing your arms now, right? You'll roll up your sleeves when you're cooking, I've noticed you doing that. But like on your birthday, you cover yourself up. You don't like showing off your chest, so I figured … I shouldn't bring your attention towards an area you're so self-conscious about."

Sanji blinked. "Oh."

"Should I not?" Zoro asked him. "I mean you are horribly sensitive, and I wouldn't mind finding other places …" His hand climbed back up Sanji's arm to his shoulder-blade, wandering down just a bit to his pectorals. "But if you don't want me to, I won't."

Sanji bit his lip. "You're treating me like a girl," he accused.

"I'm treating you with respect," Zoro corrected him. "I won't do anything you don't want."

"I'm not made out of fucking glass."

"I know."

Sanji yawned. It was getting late. He took Zoro's hand and held it in his own. "I just want to rest right now," he said softly.

Zoro nodded.

The two lapsed into silence, Sanji closing his eyes.

It didn't take him long to fall asleep to the sound of Zoro's steady breathing.

* * *

When Sanji woke up, the sun nearly blinded him. He must've been really tired to have slept in so much. He tried to sit up but found that there was a warm arm wrapped around him. He found tanned skin and green hair next to him.

Oh fuck, so that hadn't been a dream.

Sanji tried again to get up, petrified. What if Zoro was done with him? Now that Sanji had given in and had sex with him, would that mean it was the end of it all? Oh God, why was this so hard? Why did he have to do this?

Zoro pulled him even closer, forcing Sanji to be pressed against his torso.

And just like that, as cheesy as it may have sounded, Sanji knew everything was going to be okay.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : The thank-yous!_

 _cersedshadow : I feel that if you have characters like Zoro and Sanji, there's no way any relationship they have is "normal" so I think I'm fine with them having an abnormal relationship. Besides, I prefer abnormalities to the usual. Thank you, I did realize that they didn't have a conventional relationship in the least, but I feel as though any fanfiction story will never have completely "normal" or "completely healthy" relationships in them either. I like to think they have a healthy relationship at the stage that they're at now, but the way they got there wasn't orthodox._

 _mandacub : Yes, Sanji asked for it! However, the way it ended up wasn't exactly Zoro fucking him ... but, what can you do? I hope you liked the chapter!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : I just remember seeing something that told me that drugs would be cheaper than anime and then I looked at my bookshelf where I have a specific shelving unit entirely dedicated to manga (I've only got a few things there, **Naruto** , **Bleach** , some **InuYasha** , stuff like that, doesn't take up more than one shelf, but I'm planning on buying a boxed set of the first 23 volumes of **One Piece** ) and I'm like, "collectively, this one shelf of manga that contains like, maybe 12 books, cost me over a hundred dollars". The first ever volume of manga I bought was half-way through this year **, Blood Lad** , volume 1. It cost me over 20 bucks, didn't last me 20 hours but I loved it and was planning on spending like, 80 bucks to buy the next three volumes. I do love it when I can get 3 volumes in one deals._

 _Ringochan94 : I will admit that when I watch anime, I'm dedicated and then I get distracted. A lot. I'm still not done **Bleach** , which I started last summer, my friend who started after me, finished before me and is pissed I'm not done. I got distracted by **Fullmetal Alchemist,** then I got distracted from that by **Soul Eater** (I actually finished it!) then I got distracted by **Death Note,** then **Naruto** , then from **Naruto** I went to **Sword Art Online,** then from **SAO** I went to **Rurouni Kenshin,** then **InuYasha** then **Ranma** , well anyway, the point is I watch tons of anime, not necessarily finishing it because let's be honest, anime's pretty long. But anyway, I've gone back to **Naruto** so many times (the most episodes I've seen, they were still in the Chunin exams in the forest) that I've seen those first three episodes so many times I can summarize them in my sleep. I didn't use anything for references, just my own **Naruto** knowledge. That and I like to eat ramen when watching **Naruto** , it makes me feel faithful._

 _crystalbluefox : Okay so I've seen your profile and what you've written and I have to say, oh my God, I can't believe your reading my story and liking it this much! First of all, you're much older than me, by at least a decade. That you find interest in my work is amazing. Also, I like to organize and sort through fandoms by favorites. Some of your stuff is in the first three pages. I like to think that those who make the first 5 pages of most favorited stories give them this honor or something, which leads me to believe I have a legend reading my story. God you have no idea how happy I am that you're reading this! I've been looking into some of the stuff you write and oh God ... some of it made me cry but I'm reading **Taste of bittersweet Disaster** and I freaked out. WHERE IS CHAPTER 13? I NEED IT! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! If I'm missing part of the story, I feel like I've been thrown through a loop! Do people just love making Sanji suffer? And after reading what you wrote I was just like, "damn, what I'm writing's like, a horrible attempt at writing Sanji being raped" which sucks, I know, the whole rape thing, but I seriously felt fear through your writings. I can't read it at night, which sucks cause that's when I'm usually reading but ... anyway, needless to say, you have a worshipper who is beyond ecstatic that you take the time to read my lowly writings!_

 _Shizuka Taiyou : Okay I mentioned this before, but I'll mention it again cause it's something I don't like broadcasting, the **One Piece** anime, I'm not very far into it. I'm like, at episode 80 or something. I haven't actually met Ace and I'm just learning who Vivi is so I don't think I can portray her properly, so rather than ruin characters whom I know nothing about, I've decided to just not put them in until I can do them better. This is probably going to be the **One Piece** story with the least amount of the straw hat crew that's over 200 thousand words. Sorry._

 _Random Person : Yeah Spanish class was hell. If I were actually in the kitchen ... well, uh there'd be a fire. And it wouldn't because I was making flambe, it'd be more like I set off the smoke alarm and now we need the fire department. Five stars? Man, I feel like I don't deserve it, I'm so happy you like my writing!_

 _versora : Well, I hope you were surprised! I always planned for their first time to have Zoro on the "bottom" but I prefer not to use terms like that to describe their relationship._

 _Guest : Okay so, if you haven't figured it out, I answer to reviews at the end of my chapters. It doesn't really matter what chapter you reviewed, I answer it the next time I update in the chapter I update so I guess it'll take some time for you to see this one. Basically, after I made Zoro speak French I watched the Arlong arc again and just plain felt stupid. I was just like, "All of his attacks have French names! And Oda said he'd be French if he was a real person!" but uh yeah, I chose to make Zoro speak French ... heh heh heh ..._

 _Raigon : I think Zoro's doing pretty damn well, wouldn't you?_

 ** _Okay, now for my question to you all: was this chapter any good? Because its my first time showing full-on smut to people and I'm kinda nervous. Hopefully it's not cringe worthy..._**


	35. Insatiable

_**Author's Note:** So I was paranoid about this chapter being too short and then it turned out this long. I have some bad news, being that on Wednesday, I start school, which means my updates will become weekly. This is the last chapter you'll get until the 6th of September. Sorry! I hope it's good for you! Zoro's theory on sex addiction is just something I've noticed tends to happen in stories others write. I don't own **One Piece,** or **Treasure Island** or anything else that may have been mentioned in this chapter that I forgot about. Oh, okay, I'm still a total amateur at **One Piece** but I got to the 100th episode! Yay! I feel accomplished. I've met Ace! Yay! The only thing I was thinking when I met him, besides being depressed about his death (my friend totally spoiled it,, she showed me a picture of him with Luffy and was like, "That's Luffy's brother. He dies."), I was just like, "He has freckles!" And watching Nami scream "left" and even Zoro, directionally challenged Zoro, got it right but Luffy didn't ... God, I have no words for that. And Chopper and his backstory ... Anime has never made me cry before. Oh yeah! Last night I started reading a Harry and Draco story called **Must Love Quidditch**. It's official, I was up until 3 in the morning reading it and laughing my ass off. One more thing: there will be a line to separate the smut._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_ **

**Sexual content**

 **Mentions of past rape**

* * *

Chapter 35: Insatiable

* * *

Holy shit his ass hurt.

Well, it wasn't so much of a pain as it was discomfort. Lying down on his back, it felt like Zoro was sitting on some really uncomfortable chair, kind of like a dull ache that he was too lazy to complain about but when he tried to sit up, it felt more like someone was nailing at his tailbone with a hammer. He yawned and stretched, but realized that besides the aching discomfort, there was something else not right about the morning.

Sanji wasn't in the bed.

Having a large king-size bed had never seemed so pointless to Zoro. He didn't bring women home, he didn't get laid often, he didn't spend his nights looking for meaningless sex to bring them home with him. It was cold, he realized. The bed felt cold. He could vaguely remember that before he passed out from exhaustion, Sanji had been with him and now he wasn't. What had the bastard cook done? Snuck his way out of his room?

He got up from the bed, finding to his horror, it hurt to walk a bit. It hadn't even been that rough, Zoro had given worse to others, but now he was hobbling down the hallway. He paused at the end of the hall that broke off to the living room, which was connected to the kitchen. He took a deep breath. He had no idea why he was so paranoid, it wasn't like Sanji could go anywhere. Except he knew where Zoro kept the keys. He could go for groceries. Or to Partys. Or to Luffy's house. Or back to the Baratie. He knew where he was going, even if he didn't use that damn GPS. Better yet he could've called a cab and—

Zoro caught a whiff of the air.

Breakfast.

He let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

Sanji was here.

"Oi! Marimo! Get your lazy ass up, breakfast's almost ready!"

Zoro chuckled softly to himself and walked into the kitchen. He panicked though. Typically, he'd take a seat at the table but he wasn't sure if he could. The ache was like a throb that shook through his body. Walking was bearable but what would happen if he tried to sit down? He knew the hardness of his kitchen chairs. Maybe Nami had been right when she suggested he get comfy cushions for the chairs.

"Do we have any syrup?" asked Sanji, turning around. He stopped when he saw Zoro staring at the chair with an evil aura emanating from his body. "Um …" He paused and blushed. "You okay?"

"Yeah, fine," Zoro replied in a clipped voice. He hesitantly pulled out a chair and thought about it. Could he sit down? Could he really without too much pain?

"Are you going to sit?" Sanji asked softly.

"Yeah, fine," Zoro repeated.

Sanji rolled his eyes. "That doesn't even make sense," he told him. "Are you hurt?" he asked in a more serious tone. "I didn't … tear anything or … or I don't know, did I hurt you?"

"I can handle a little pain," Zoro told him nonchalantly.

"Oh yeah? Then how about you sit down?"

Zoro shook his head. "Nah, I'm good standing."

Sanji sighed. "Don't do this."

"Do what?" Zoro asked.

"Don't act like this," Sanji said. "What was it you said? 'It's a different kind of intimacy, one that can't be taken back' or some shit like that? Do you want to take it back?" When he spoke this time, Zoro could hear the insecurity in his voice but of course, Sanji turned away from him at that moment and coughed into his sleeve. "I don't mind if we forget it. If it's making us awkward and weird around each other, isn't it better forgotten?"

"Liar," Zoro said.

"I'm not lying," Sanji lied once more. "I … If you want to take it back, we can just pretend it never happened."

"Did you not listen to me? It's something that _can't_ be taken back," Zoro said. "This is just like you, idiot-cook." He shook his head. "Look at me Sanji, turn around and look at me."

Slowly, the blond pivoted until he was looking at Zoro. His eyes were so guarded, the way he was breathing seemed to have stilled, like he was waiting for the ball to drop, for the chaos to ensue. He really thought Zoro wanted to take it back. The ahou.

"I don't regret it Sanji," Zoro said in a firm voice. "I don't and don't you dare give me that look, I'm not lying to you. I told you, every time I have sex, I think about it. I've been thinking about it longer than you've been ready for it. I don't know what the fuck you're worrying about, whatever problems you have with what we've done, but I don't regret it. I'll admit I'm sore as hell in place I never thought I could be and its made me realize that these fucking kitchen chairs are devil's spawn," Sanji let out a small smirk at that, "but I wouldn't take it back. Anything I do with you … I do what I do with you because I know I won't regret it. I've never done anything in my life I've regretted and I'm not going to start now. So Sanji, I don't want to pretend nothing happened, I don't want to forget." He took a deep breath and tried his best to calm himself down. "What about you? Do you want to forget?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip and turned away from him. He was shaking. He put his hands on the counter and Zoro could see he was clenching his fists. "I …" Sanji took a deep breath that seemed to resonate throughout his entire body, shuddering his entirely frame. "I don't …" He swallowed again. "No," he said a bit more firmly. "I don't … I don't want to forget."

Zoro gave him a small smile. "Then it's settled. We'll remember."

Sanji nodded and let out a small laugh. "Is it really that easy?"

"What is?"

"Just … deciding something like that," Sanji asked in a small voice. "Is it that easy to make a decision like that? To just … choose to remember or to forget? Is that really how it works?"

Zoro's brow furrowed. "Well, I guess it depends on who you're talking with." He shrugged. "I don't know. But you know, you don't need another person's consent to remember or forget," Zoro pointed out. "I mean sometimes you just … forget on your own, or you'll remember on your own. It didn't matter what you said you know," Zoro added. "I'd still remember. I remember everything when it comes to you, you know."

Sanji rolled his eyes and let out a laugh. "When did you become so understanding and romantic?"

"It's your fault," Zoro told him. "You're making me … mushy and shit," he accused. "See, this never happens with other people. Most people I get into a relationship, we go out for a few dates, she gets overly attached, I feel bad about it, maybe we fuck and then I break it up. Longest relationship I've ever had lasted about two years," Zoro said. He quieted for a moment. Remembering her … It was hard. He bit his bottom lip. "Somehow, in that time with them, there was never any time for any romantic shit."

"Who was she?" Sanji asked. "That you stayed with her for so long? Why'd you break up with her?" asked Sanji in a quiet voice.

Zoro bit his bottom lip. "She was … someone who was very special to me. And I didn't break up with her," Zoro added. "She …" He shook his head. Sanji deserved to know, didn't he? Fuck what Nami said about past relationships never being brought up, Sanji knew Zoro loved him and as much as he wanted Sanji to tell him he loved him too, he'd wait. Sanji must know he was devoted to him, he was the one he was in a relationship with now, not her. He turned his head away. "I didn't break up with her and she didn't break up with me."

Sanji's eyes widened. "So does that mean—?"

"She died."

Sanji was silent, the air around them feeling so tense it seemed as though they would both suffocate from it.

"So then …" Sanji bit his lip. "The sword …"

"Was hers," Zoro nodded. "Yeah. It was."

Sanji nodded.

Zoro wanted to kill himself. What was he thinking? Talking about a dead lover to Sanji? This was ridiculous, he shouldn't have opened his mouth, what the fuck had he been thinking? "Look Sanji—"

"You're a cuddler."

Zoro froze. What had Sanji just said? "Excuse me?"

"You're a cuddler, did you know?" Sanji asked, turning back to the stove. He flipped a pancake and put it on a plate. "I woke up earlier today and you were cuddling me. Couldn't get out of the fucking bed for a while."

What was going on? Sanji was acting all calm and cool and collected and here was Zoro, freaking out, desperately wishing he could shove words back into his mouth. God this was weird. "You're not …" He bit his bottom lip. "You're not concerned or anything about …" He trailed off.

"It's not like I didn't know you had past relationships," Sanji said with a shrug. "Usopp mentioned it, said you had few relationships, he could count them all on one hand. Would've thought with your looks you'd be a Casanova or something but whatever." He piled a few more pancakes onto the plate and put it on the table. "There's no use getting upset over something that's already happened." He smirked. "What, did you want me to get jealous?"

 _Yeah, kind of. A little bit._

Zoro shook his head. "Don't be stupid."

"Are you going to sit?"

"Right." Zoro sat down and found that instead of immediate pain, it was more like a dull ache. He was still in pain, but it was more like manageable discomfort. It was strange, with this lingering reminder of what they had done the night before, the pain in his body, you'd think he'd never let Sanji near his ass again but instead it was quite the opposite. He wondered vaguely if this was what all girls felt after their first time. No, he knew that wasn't what they felt. She hadn't been like that — oh fuck, had he really forgotten that she was his first time?

Sanji took a seat and began to eat, nodding towards Zoro's plate for him to begin eating as well.

" _Itadakimasu_."

 _Holy fuck._

"How do you do this?" asked Zoro with his mouth full of food, so instead it sounded more like, "Cow d'yo d' tis?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Zoro, chew." Zoro sent him a glare but he chewed his food. "Swallow." The cook was enjoying this too much as Zoro finally swallowed. "Better. Now you may speak."

"I may speak?" Zoro repeated. "Who are you, the fucking Queen of England?"

"I'm not that old and wrinkly," Sanji told him. "Now, you were saying?"

Zoro wanted to glare at him a bit more, but decided not to. "How the fuck do you do this?" He stabbed his pancake with his fork and turned it over, looking at it from different angles. "Even without syrup, its still the best stack of pancakes I've ever had." He shook his head. "I swear it's like … your cooking skills are so good, they're the kind of skills you want to make love to and you feel like its already happened when you take a bite. How can you possibly make food orgasmic?"

"Do you have a food kink?"

"You have an earring kink," Zoro reminded him.

Sanji smirked and licked his lips slowly. Zoro watched as his tongue trailed along his lips before it reentered his mouth. He shivered. "That I do Zoro." His smirk only widened at the look on Zoro's face. "Whose fault is that, do you suppose?"

Zoro stabbed his pancake even harsher and shoved it into his mouth. "Shut up," which then sounded like "shuddaap!" He got his point across though, so he supposed it wasn't a total waste.

Sanji rolled his eyes and laughed at him anyway. "Cat got your tongue?" he teased.

Zoro swallowed and glared at him. "How is it that I'm in pain while you can just go on your merry way?"

"I'm just skilled like that," Sanji replied with a grin. Shaking his head, he cleared his throat. "But seriously, are you feeling okay?"

"I'm not fragile," Zoro told him, rolling his eyes. "You should know that. It takes a lot to bang me up." He stopped, his eyes widening. Sanji turned red. Zoro wondered just how red he could make him. An idea popped into his head. "You're not going to become a sex addict now, are you?"

Those fucked up eyebrows rose all the way to Sanji's hairline. "A w-what?" he choked out, nearly suffocating on his own food. It sounded weird, especially since he had been chewing at the moment. He coughed and spat out what was in his mouth, wiping his mouth with a napkin.

Zoro laughed. "I mean usually after a couple does it for the first time, they tend to get addicted to it," he explained. "Kind of like a honeymoon phase, but with sex."

"AHOU!"

 _Aw, he's turning red. How cute._

"I'm just saying," Zoro said with a shrug. "What, never happened to you?"

"You said you've only had sex with three people—"

"Four, now," Zoro corrected him. "And I remember each time, when we first started, it kinda was like we were in heat." He frowned. "Well, except for one …"

"You're referring to yourself as a dog," Sanji told him. "You are aware of that, aren't you?"

"So? I'm a man, I have needs." Zoro rolled his eyes. "Come on, I was joking about you being a sex addict. But seriously, the random fucking obsession,it usually lasts for like, I don't know, two weeks or something after the first time. Try to hold yourself back from jumping me, okay?"

"Fucking obsession?" Sanji repeated. He shook his head. "You're too embarrassing!"

"Embarrassing?" Zoro echoed. "Nah, it's not so much as that as I threw away my dignity a while ago. I mean sure, I suppose you could say that going at it like rabbits is a somewhat … strange topic of discussion and sure, maybe I find it a bit … awkward to discuss, but in the end, does it really matter at the end of the day? I'm alive, I'm well, you're well, we're all living and breathing."

Sanji's ears were turning pink. "Zoro," he hissed, gritting his teeth.

"You know, for a flirt, you're pretty innocent."

"Flirt?"

"What? You think I didn't see you hanging around all those ladies at the Baratie?" Zoro shook his head. "Are you kidding me? You hang off of them like a leech or something. I will admit that on the occasion, you were pretty smooth, but your eyes do this really weird thing where they turn into hearts and you start blabbering like an idiot. You might want to see a doctor about that."

Sanji turned his head away. "Yeah well …" He blushed. "I can appreciate the feminine beauty around me, unlike some people. Women are delicate beauties who deserve the highest respect so pardon me for doing something that's quite frankly, mandatory for each decent human being who wants to call himself a gentleman, so if you have a problem with my abundance of manners, rather than your lack of them—"

"Hey, you wanna fuck?"

Sanji's eyes widened and his head turned sharply to Zoro, who was leaning over the table with a big grin on his face. Zoro swore, if Sanji had glasses, he'd be doing that snobbish thing where he pushed them up to the bridge of his nose that those genius characters did in anime, sometimes from embarrassment or sometimes because they wanted to look threatening. "Who's the sex addict now?"

Zoro shrugged. "Dunno. Wanna fuck?"

Sanji pushed out his chair before pushing it back in. He began to clear the table, muttering things under his breath. "You're unbelievable," he said.

"Maybe." Zoro smirked. "It's too easy to fluster you."

"It's not nice to tease," Sanji snapped, turning on the tap to clean the dishes.

Zoro rose from his seat and wrapped his arms around Sanji's thin frame, lowering his mouth to his ear. "Au contraire, teasing is the very thing that makes up foreplay."

Sanji shivered and Zoro could feel each move he made against his body. "Let me go," he said softly.

"Do you really want that?" Zoro asked, biting Sanji's ear softly.

"Y-yes."

"Say it like you mean it."

"Zoro!"

Zoro laughed. "Come on," he said, putting his hands on Sanji's waist. "Don't you feel proud? You're the first guy to ever make me bend over. Hell, you're so hot, you turned me gay. Don't you want to take advantage of it? Come on, fuck me on your counter."

"We're in the kitchen," Sanji said, the tips of his ears turning red. "It would be disrespectful."

"Hey Sanji," Zoro whispered, suddenly solemn. "They didn't … was it here?"

Sanji blinked and pushed against Zoro, trying to separate them but Zoro stood strong. "Leave me alone, Zoro."

"I'm sorry." Zoro looked at the ground, feeling rather ashamed. Of course it was here, where else could the cooks do it? If it had been in the dining hall, Zoro was certain Sanji would never be able to look at his clients the same way again. But then again, how come he wasn't scared of the kitchen? So many bad memories in here, but there were probably ones that were even better. "Hey Sanji?"

"What, Zoro?" Sanji snapped, cleaning a plate furiously.

"What would you say to making some memories?"

Sanji sighed. "What are you talking— umph?!"

Zoro closed the distance between them, kissing Sanji softly. He let his hands wander from Sanji's hips to his chest, playing with the buttons of his shirt as he invaded the cook's mouth. The noises the man made … They had to be illegal, there was no way he could sound so good. Sanji's voice … It drove Zoro absolutely insane.

"Zoro," Sanji gasped as the swordsman trailed kisses down his neck. sucking at his skin. _So sensitive. So responsive._ "W-what are you doing?"

"Trying to get you in the mood," he replied bluntly, finally managing to get his hands on the knot of Sanji's tie. He started to tug at, pulling. Why wouldn't it come off?

"Oh really?"

"Mhmm," Zoro hummed against Sanji's pulse. "Is it working?"

"I could kick you in the balls right now, you know."

Zoro frowned for reasons other than Sanji's strange, complicated way of dressing. "I'll take that as a no." He pulled at the tie harder and Sanji kicked him in the shins, forcing Zoro off of him.

Sanji sighed, rolling his eyes. "Honestly, you're shit at this whole seduction thing, it's a miracle you got me to go out with you," Sanji said, straightening his tie. "I've been told having your lover take off your clothes can be erotic, but with the way you do it, unless you're into breath-play, you'll just end up killing the one you want to fuck." Wait, the way Sanji's fingers were working at his tie, he wasn't straightening it, he was …

The tie slid away and Sanji smoothed it out on his knee. "I ironed this recently," he complained.

Zoro was confused. Sanji didn't seem like he was up for anything but he had taken off his tie so what did that mean? "Did it work?" Zoro asked.

"Did what work?"

"My seduction act."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Don't quit kenjutsu."

Zoro sighed. Perhaps he may have teased Sanji about becoming a sex addict but the pain was almost non-existent now and he was reeling to go again. It was different to know that the barrier of sex had already been crossed. It made him feel as though, in terms of touch, he couldn't possibly do something he hadn't already done.

"Turn around," Sanji told him.

"What?" Zoro asked, looking at him strangely.

"Turn around," Sanji repeated. "Put your hands on the table in front of you, facing away from me."

Zoro gaped. "But—"

"Do it, shitty Marimo," Sanji snapped.

Zoro nodded and hesitantly, turned around, placing his hands on the marble island in the centre of the kitchen, facing away from Sanji. "Okay, I'm doing it, but do you think you want to tell me why I'm doing this?" he asked, raising an inquisitive eyebrow, despite the fact that Sanji couldn't see him.

"Can't you just trust me?" Sanji asked and though he couldn't see him, Zoro knew Sanji was rolling his eyes. He had always heard of others feeling others facial expressions without seeing them, like a conversation on the phone where you could tell that person was smiling into the receiver, but that mainly happened because of tone of voice or having a deep connection with the other to the point where he understood them completely. Had he really gotten to know Sanji that much in six months? No, wait, it had been more than that. Seven, wasn't it? "Stay there," Sanji instructed.

Zoro did and watched as Sanji moved from behind him to the pantry, taking out a bottle of olive oil before placing it on the counter next to Zoro. Zoro reached out for it but Sanji kicked his hand away. Zoro winced. "You can't just use your hands, like a normal person?!"

"Can't injure my hands, remember?" Sanji pointed out. "They're my treasure."

Zoro snorted. "Of course, how could I forget?"

* * *

Sanji was so silent in moving, Zoro only realized he was behind him again when he felt something tugging at the drawstrings of his pants. "S-Sanji?" he choked out as Sanji's hands moved, pulling at his pants slowly before he took Zoro's member in his hand and started to stroke him slowly.

"Hmm?" the blond responded, his head buried in Zoro's neck, the vibrations causing Zoro to shiver. "You're half-hard already," he said with a smirk.

"Whose fault is that?" Zoro snapped through gritted teeth.

"Now Zoro," Sanji teased, gripping him harder. Zoro gasped, his hands gripping the edge of the table. "It's not nice to blame others."

"That's rich, you reprimanding me?" Zoro scoffed and Sanji's hands left him. He hissed, almost whining but he held it in. Last night he had been nearly powerless against Sanji, letting him do whatever he wanted, now he wasn't going to embarrass himself by doing anything unnecessary.

Sanji took the olive oil from the counter and smirked, opening it. He put some on his hand, rubbing the greasy liquid between his fingers. His other hand snuck lower, pulling at Zoro's pants until they slid down slightly. "Move your hips a little," Sanji told him softly.

Zoro did as told.

It was strange to him. It didn't feel like he was being ordered around, more like he was given a strong suggestion that he himself would've probably followed had he suggested it to himself. It didn't feel like he was powerless or anything, he felt equal to him and that was what was so amazing about it. Sex had almost always seemed like an unspoken battle for dominance. Whenever the act was done, there was always someone who may be in more control than the other person, whether its because they're ordering the other around, or if it's because they just seemed to demand obedience without speaking. With Sanji it was nothing like that, nothing at all.

It was like they were equals.

Zoro was pulled out of his philosophical thoughts by a sudden intrusion. In his body.

Zoro lurched forward slightly as Sanji pushed his finger a bit deeper inside of him. He could feel the olive oil and found that unlike last night, it slid in slightly easier. The ache came back slightly, but Sanji was gentle as he thrust his finger in and out.

"How the fuck are you still so tight?" Sanji wondered aloud.

"Skills," Zoro replied with a smirk.

Another finger went in.

"I thought my seduction act didn't work," Zoro reminded him.

"It didn't."

"Oh yeah? Don't fucking lie to me, I can feel your hard-on."

"Had a good dream," Sanji shot back.

"Really? And you're still reeling from it? You had to have been awake for at least an hour to make that breakfast."

"Pancakes aren't that hard."

"But you are."

Sanji shoved three fingers into him at that. Zoro winced. "Holy shit, warn me first, why don't you?" he demanded.

"If you don't like it, I'll stop," Sanji said.

Zoro blushed. "I never said that."

"So, tell me something, Zoro," Sanji said, leaning close to Zoro's ear. "Where'd that whole Pirate Hunter thing come from?"

"We're talking about this— hah, fuck!— now?" Zoro demanded, feeling Sanji hit his prostate.

"Why not?"

"I don't know, because you're finger-fucking me in the middle of the kitchen?!"

"I thought you were a master swordsman, don't tell me something like this can break your concentration," Sanji teased. "So come on, when were were fighting that time at Partys, they said something about Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro. What was that all about?"

"Luffy likes pirates," Zoro replied, trying to hold in his moans and yet to falter in his conversation with Sanji would be like admitting defeat. "Read too much _Treasure Island_ as a kid. I think— ah— stop smirking like that, that didn't mean anything! Anyway, I just think he went through this phase, you know, how sometimes girls get obsessed with marrying princes when they're younger or shit like that? Except Luffy just never grew out of it. So he likes to play pirate on Halloween and demanded we become his 'crew' for the day and he's already set up the whole hierarchy at Partys so that it seems like a pirate ship. They— fuck, Sanji, right there!" Zoro paused, taking a moment to breathe in deeply before continuing to speak. "They call him Captain and I'm the first mate, I suppose the next thing he's going to say is that you're our cook on the ship. I secretly think he's got some kind of pirate kink really, it's unnatural how often Nami call him Captain."

"Really?" Sanji's fingers were pulled out and then Zoro heard the sound of a belt being undone. "You don't say."

"Wait," Zoro screamed, a bit louder than necessary. "Are we really doing this?"

"We've already done it once, haven't we?" Sanji pointed out. "Besides," the sound of Sanji's pants hitting the floor seemed a thousand times louder in Zoro's ears. "I want to see how Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro begs."

Zoro's eyes widened. He made an attempt to turn around to face Sanji, but Sanji kept a firm grip on his hips, stopping him. "You're fucking insane if you think I'm going to beg you for anything, Curly Brow."

"We'll see," Sanji said in a far too pleased voice.

Zoro's one thought the moment Sanji entered him:

 _How the fuck does this fit?_

Had he been that deep inside of him before? Zoro wasn't sure, but now he wasn't surprised he had been sore this morning. Zoro was bigger than Sanji (which kept his male ego in check), but fuck, this hurt. Even with the olive oil, Zoro clenched his teeth and felt like wincing. Sanji didn't move, just stayed still inside of him.

 _Holy fuck, we're actually connected._

Zoro didn't think sappy thoughts on sex. Sure he thought it was something he wouldn't do with just anybody, but it wasn't like he had saved himself for marriage or anything. He had a few criteria when it came to a sex partner. He had to know them well and vice versa, they had to be in a relationship with him (because Zoro had common sense not to cheat or start a no-strings-attached relationship), and when it was over, should they stop their relationship, it shouldn't be awkward. He didn't think things like the two of them were connected by the red threat of fate and that would lead to them being married, or that there was only one person out there for him who could be the love of his life and give him amazing sex. At this moment though, the only thing he registered was that Sanji was pulsating inside of him and they were literally connected by body.

He took a few moments to breathe in deeply, trying to calm himself down. Zoro waited but it didn't seem like Sanji was going to move any time soon. "Fucking move, dammit!" he snapped and he could tell Sanji was smirking. "That wasn't begging, that was a command," he said hastily.

"Of course, Captain."

"I'm not the— _holy shit_." Zoro was surprised his mouth managed to work and form somewhat coherent words. As Sanji pulled out of him, he clenched, his whole body tensing. When he pushed back in, Zoro's whole body shuddered in reaction.

"You were saying?"

"Damn bastard," Zoro hissed. "You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"What makes you think that?" One of Sanji's hands moved from Zoro's hip to his chest, pushing his plain, grey shirt up on his chest. He pinched one of Zoro's nipples while pushing into him harshly.

Zoro gasped but he bit his bottom lip to prevent himself from saying anything. When Sanji pulled at his nipple, he could taste the blood as it leaked into his mouth, tasting metallic. Focusing on the bitter taste of the blood was better than focusing on what Sanji was doing to him or else he might really beg and that would mean losing to Sanji.

Sanji's hand wandered down, to Zoro's cock, wrapping around it. He teased the head, before focusing his attention on his balls, squeezing them.

"Fuck," Zoro hissed against his will. He turned his head to scream at Sanji for causing him so much pain (from the various kick in the balls to the recent squeeze that made him certain he'd never reproduce again) but Sanji covered his lips with his own, swallowing all of Zoro's complaints.

"Come on Pirate Hunter," Sanji said, pulling away from him. "You know what you need to say."

"Go to hell," Zoro told him, rolling his eyes just as Sanji hit his prostate. In the end, his supposed-to-be threatening words turned into a loud moan. The force of the thrust had Zoro slammed against the counter, using his hands to stop himself from falling over, his knees feeling weak. Dear God he wanted to cum so badly. Sanji probably knew it too. Fuck, but how was he supposed to make the blond cum first?

Zoro clenched around Sanji, tensing his entire body. He heard Sanji let out a surprised grunt and could hear the intakes of breath Sanji was taking, they sounded as though he was clenching his teeth. Zoro tried to tightened even more, knowing that at least when he was inside someone, tightness tended to make him lose it.

"Holy shit …" Sanji was taking deep breaths now.

Zoro thrust back against him, smirking all the while. He wouldn't cum first, there was no way that was happening. He pushed back in time with Sanji's thrusts, clenching around the blond's cock inside of him. Sanji reached out until his hands were on the counter next to Zoro's. Zoro took one of his hands in his and smirked. "How about you? Going to beg yet?"

"You're the fucking devil," Sanji snapped at him. Zoro's hand was turning blue from how harshly Sanji was squeezing it.

 _Shit, I'm going to cum._

Zoro could hold back his orgasm no longer and came, his cum splattering the side of the counter, dripping down to the floor. Just as he came, he could feel Sanji's release inside of him and the cold liquid dripped down his thighs.

* * *

Zoro took a few deep breaths, trying to get a better reign on himself. Sanji was pulling up his pants and buckling them up again. He took the olive oil from the counter and frowned. "Fuck, we're going to need more of this."

"What, you plan on fucking me again?" Zoro asked with a smirk.

"Fucking pervert," Sanji snapped, "it's kitchen supplies! You're buying me two new bottles."

"What?" Zoro demanded, standing upright as Sanji cleaned off his hands in the sink. "It's your fault!"

Sanji shook his head. "It's your fault for seducing me in the first place."

"I thought you said it didn't work!"

Sanji smirked. "I lied."

Zoro was speechless and could go nothing as Sanji straightened out his shirt and put his tie back on, before leaving the room, calling over his shoulder, "Clean up the mess, alright Marimo?"

Fucking cook was going to fucking die one of these days.

 _But you love him, don't you?_

Zoro sighed. To love someone that screwed up, who claimed to have no self-confidence and then went and fucked him in the middle of the kitchen, someone who was such a contradiction, so beautiful and yet such a disaster.

 _I'm really fucked up in the head, aren't I?_

 _No, just whipped_ , a voice in the back of his mind told him.

Zoro couldn't help but grin.

Yeah, he was. Totally and completely whipped, wrapped around that beautiful disaster's finger and he didn't even fucking care.

 _Like I said, whipped_ , the little voice said.

 _Shut up._

"Oi! Curly Brow! Get your fucking ass back in the kitchen, you shitty bastard! If you think I'm cleaning this on my own, you're fucking retarded!"

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank yous!_

 _Ringochan94: Really? I got nervous writing it! I do the same thing of starting and ditching with manga too. I remember my friend started watching **Blue Exorcist** and I had read like, I dunno, 10 chapters of it. It's not that I lose interest, it's just that I forget I was reading it. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter!_

 _Random Person : I love dorky characters and I'm dorky so uh, yeah, that's what you get._

 _Guest : Second person to tell me I made them nervous. Interesting ..._

 _mandacub : Since I don't think Sanji's up for that so soon, uh, not for a while._

 _JustCallMeLucie : I understand if you don't like smut that much. However i worked hard to make this chapter less about the smut and more about their conversation, so if you focus on that instead, I think this chapter will be enjoyable for you._

 _nachtwolke (x2) : Okay so I'll tell you how I answer the reviews. I take the name that's written at the top of the review and copy and paste it onto my document. So if you want me to call you by your name, even if you aren't actually logged in, can you write your name in the area where it says Guest? It'll just make this easier for me. I'm sorry if I offended you by using the generic term "guest" I hope you liked Sanji topping now. It was going to be dirtier, but it didn't end up that way because Zoro ended up too submissive and then I was like, "No, he's an ex-pirate hunter, even in this world he wouldn't lay down like that" because unlike the other one where he just lets Sanji take control, Sanji isn't asking him to do something like what he's asking in this chapter._

 _lilcutieprincess : Well, I updated! I hope you liked it!_

 _DarkSunrise19 : I like development and teasing people, hence why it lasted so long till they did it and I had chapters to tease, like chapters 20, 26 and 32. I've come to the conclusion that almost all chapters with the number 3 or are divisible by 3, are the ones with a lot of importance to them, where milestones happen. Chapter 6 Sanji starts to live with Zoro, chapter 13 Zoro and Sanji's first kiss, chapter 15 Zoro realizes he likes Sanji, chapter 23 their relationship begins, chapter 30 Zoro says "I love you", chapter 34 they have sex for the first time. Lots of threes._


	36. White Day

_**Author's Note** : Okay, I officially adore Ace and can only pray I'll never have to watch the death scene (wishful thinking, I know). This chapter has to be the longest chapter I've ever written through Sanji's fact: my friend came back from her summer in China (she's Chinese, I'm also Chinese, adopted, and totally Americanized, even though I'm Canadian ... I'm known as the "Chinese girl who doesn't speak Mandarin".) and she got me a present cause I always used to try and "steal" these two **Bleach** folders she got in Japan and so she got me a **One Piece** wallet! I totally love it! Now, since this story is coming to its end eventually (in about a month and a half, we've got six chapters left. I know, it's amazing.), I do have other stories I want to write. I make a folder on my computer entitled with a pairings name if I have a lot of I want to write about them. Zoro and Sanji have a pretty damn big folder. Anyway, a lot of those stories are still in the drawing board stages, so if I write anything else after this story, it probably won't come until after my December break cause I want all of my stories to be as prepared and planned as this story was. About five or so chapters ago, I called my friend and freaked out over the story. She had never read it, but she was just like, "so ending it, how are you gonna do it?" and I was just like, "I have no frigging idea." So she gave me an ending, which I hope you'll like. I don't own **One Piece** or **Bleach** and sorry if the random text of comments from Zoro are kind of scattered. Line to separate the smut. I decided to update a day early! Next update will be on Sunday (next Sunday) and pardon me but the last 200 words or so were written on my iPad and I tried to correct auto-correct but if it ends up saying Marino instead of Marimo and a few other things, I'll get on that when I edit it again. Also, there's a poll on my profile so you can vote for the story you want most!_

* * *

 ** _Beautiful Disaster_**  
 _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Sexual content**

 **Past mention of abuse and rape and bullies (because kids are cruel)**

* * *

Chapter 36: White Day

* * *

There was something he was forgetting, wasn't there? There was something important about today, but what was it?

Sanji thought about it.

Well, his birthday had already passed, that had been nearly two weeks ago. He and Zoro had already spoken about "anniversaries" and how they'd probably only celebrate on their six months anniversary and yearly anniversary. It made it sound like they were married, but Sanji knew that gay marriage was prohibited by Japanese law. Besides, he didn't need to be married to Zoro to enjoy his time with him.

So it wasn't a birthday, wasn't an anniversary. They had gotten Valentine's Day out of the way a month ago— wait. Fuck.

Sanji sat up in his bed and wanted to hit himself. Of course, how could he have forgotten? He slipped out of bed, got dressed quickly and began wondering about whether or not Zoro even remembered today. It didn't get as much advertisement as Valentine's Day, but in high schools it was pretty damn important.

Had Zoro ever given chocolates to a girl on this day?

Sanji shook his head. No, best not think about past relationships Zoro had. Instead he entered the kitchen, focusing on the task of making breakfast.

Just as Sanji was about to get the ingredients out, he paused.

Did Zoro want something special today? He wasn't a hundred percent sure that Zoro even remembered the holiday's existence, plus factoring in how much he hated Valentine's Day, would White Day really make a difference to him? If Sanji made something fancy, would that make Zoro remember White Day and then would he say he hated it too? But what if Sanji didn't make a huge meal and Zoro got upset, thinking Sanji had forgotten? Out of the two of them, Zoro was the most forgetful though … Fuck, what was he supposed to do?

He stayed like that, hands flat on the kitchen counter, wondering a thousand things, his mind racing a million miles per second, wondering what he should do.

And that's how Zoro found him about an hour later.

"What're you doing?" asked the swordsman, a confused furrow in his brow.

"Zoro!" Sanji yelped, not that he'd ever admit his voice could reach such a high octave. "What are you doing here?"

 _Wow, you sound smart Sanji, you share an apartment with the guy. What is he doing here? He fucking lives here, dipshit!_

"I live here," Zoro said slowly, giving him a strange look. "So uh, where's breakfast?"

"Right! Breakfast!" Sanji tried to shove the blush down but it did him no good. "Um right." He bit his bottom lip. "The kitchen's just a bit … weird now." He stared at the counter and tried to rid himself of the image of Zoro bending over.

The kitchen always held memories for him and every time he walked into one, he could see his past flash before his eyes. In Zoro's kitchen if he looked towards the sink he could see himself and Zoro starting a food fight, near the table and he could see Zoro sitting there with his feet propped up, mumbling something or another about Sanji's cooking at another weird hour. If he looked to the fridge, he'd remember the eggs and almost instantly, he could feel the yolk leaking into his eye. If he looked at the counter besides the countless times he had kneaded dough on that counter or had a conversation with Zoro near the counter, he'd remember that night when he had blurted out his nightmare to him. And now he could see Zoro bending over.

It was better than walking into the kitchen at the Baratie, if he looked in anywhere, he could remember the harsh beatings. Except for the corners. He remembered the corners as places to hide, places where he tried to make himself so small, no one could ever spot him. Except they did and then they'd pull him out of the small dark corner and push him into a counter.

The back room … the back room had horrible memories too, the nights he spent in there alone cooking, his tears occasionally falling into the soup, but more recently, he could remember the sight of Zoro falling to the ground, covered in flour, pulling him up off the floor.

The dining hall, an inconvenient room to sleep in when he was done cleaning the kitchen, instead of being filled with imaginary guests, his eyes were always drawn to Zoro's table and he could remember the stillness of the room whenever he blurted out something remarkably loudly.

Yes, Zoro had occupied many of his memories now and seemed to wash away the bad.

"Hey, wanna do it again?"

"What?" Sanji asked distractedly. It took him a moment to exit his thoughts but when he did, his eyes widened. "W-wait, aren't you sore?"

"Didn't I tell you? It takes a lot to bang me up," Zoro said with a grin. "Come on, we're still on our sex honeymoon."

"Food," Sanji told him. "Sit at the table. What do you want for breakfast?"

Yes, this was better. Instead of stressing over something grand, perhaps he'd better just ask Zoro his opinion. If he wanted something fancy, then he remembered. If he asked for flap-jacks, he forgot. Simple.

"Dunno, anything you make is good."

"Bastard," Sanji muttered though clenched teeth.

"Huh?" Zoro sat up a bit straighter in his chair. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Nothing," Sanji snapped, trying to reign in his temper. Many months in Zoro's company caused Sanji's temper to flare. "You did absolutely _nothing_."

"You sure?" Zoro asked. "You look a little tense."

"I'm fine," Sanji told him. "Sit down and I'll make you something. French toast?"

"Okay, sure."

The swordsman fell back into his seat and kicked his feet up on the table. Sanji's eye twitched. "You're being disrespectful to the furniture."

"Should you really be saying that?" asked Zoro. "You've had a food fight, a make-out session and a fuck in this room, which all revolved around furniture— well, and the floor …" He trailed off with a small laugh. "I think it's a bit late to be worried about respect."

"Shut up!" Oh great, he was even developing Zoro's habit of his fruitless exclamations. Next he'd forget his manners entirely!

Sanji moved around the kitchen, picking out the ingredients he'd need. French toast was pretty simple, it shouldn't take him that long to make it.

He worked in silence until Zoro spoke.

"Did I screw up again?"

Sanji paused in surprise. "What?"

"Did I screw up again?" Zoro repeated. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I told you, I don't usually do this romantic shit and I have no idea how to. I mean I can ask Nami and all but that rarely does any good, she just ends up beating me up and Usopp can be useful on the occasion but then he'll tell you this obvious lie and you're confused on whether or not he actually meant what he said before and Luffy's only good for advice if you catch him on days where he's feeling really philosophical or else he's utterly useless and—"

"Zoro," Sanji cut him off. "You didn't screw up anything. I'm just … stressed," he chose his words carefully because really, Zoro did nothing wrong. He had fun though, watching as the swordsman tripped over himself. Whenever he was in the wrong, the way he made up for it always payed off and made Sanji get the distinct impression he was worrying about nothing in the first place and then felt bad for making Zoro go out of his way to do something nice for him, especially since he was so _awkward_ about it. "Breakfast will be ready soon, okay?"

There was silence again and just as Sanji was about to take the toast out of the oven, Zoro spoke up.

"Hey, about your eye …" He trailed off. "Is it injured?"

"What?"

"I mean you only ever show me one eye, and I think it's pretty weird that with the moves you pull when you fight and the amount of energy you have and all … how is it I've never seen both of your eyes?" Zoro froze. "Do you not have one?"

"Yes Zoro," Sanji said dryly. "I'm a mummy who escaped from their sarcophagus and stole someone else's clothes. I wear make-up on a daily basis in order to maintain a human like appearance but one day this little runt found out and poked out one of my eyes, which lead to me sporting this rather unusual hairstyle."

Zoro crossed his arms and huffed. "You don't have to be so snotty."

"I'm not snotty, I'm sarcastic," Sanji replied, rolling his eyes. "What, you really want to see it?"

"I mean … just so I know it didn't actually fall out or anything …"

Sanji stared at him. "Is talking about loose eyeball sockets really the topic of conversation you've chosen for this morning?"

"I was just curious …"

Sanji sighed. He put the toast on the plate in front of Zoro before taking a seat next to him, which was strange because usually Sanji sat across from him. He took a deep breath and pushed his hair back, revealing his other eye to Zoro who stared at him.

There was silence then—

"Your face is asymmetrical."

Sanji rolled his eyes and made a move to turn away but Zoro caught him by the cheek and pulled him back. He brushed at Sanji's bangs, making sure they kept out of the way. "Why do you cover it?"

"Well you said my face is asymmetrical," Sanji said.

Zoro rolled his eyes. "I don't think that's the reason."

Sanji bit his bottom lip slowly. "When I was younger, Zeff signed me up for school. He thought it was a good idea since I had spent so much time in an orphanage and while the Baratie was still new, it could manage a few hours without me. I was enrolled in elementary school for a few years before I told him I hated it and I didn't want to go back."

"But at school, weren't you away from—"

"The cooks?" Sanji shook his head. "The thing is I thought the cooks were better than school."

"Why?"

Sanji let out a low chuckle that held no humour in it. "Kids can be cruel."

"So … what happened?" Zoro asked. "That you chose to stop going to school?" Seeing the look on Sanji's face, the way he seemed to frown, made him hastily add, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"No, it's fine," Sanji said. "I … I never told anyone about it, not even Zeff. I didn't want him to worry." He took a deep breath before he started to talk. "Zeff was pretty disorganized with the registration papers so I started off on the wrong foot since I came in the middle of the year. You know how it is, you need to be there at the beginning of the first semester where everyone makes their friends or else you're an outsider. Well, I would've been an outsider anyway …"

* * *

 _I know I don't look like the traditional Japanese. I have blond hair, which was weird and made me stick out like a sore thumb in a crowd of dark hair. I was also pretty short for a while until puberty. I had light eyes whereas everyone else had darker ones. I can't tan, I burn instead. Even when I was short, my limbs just didn't look appropriate, they just seemed to fall at my sides, I was always thin and since I've been able to grow, I've always been lanky._

 _I talked weird to others. I knew just about everything about culinary things but what kid in elementary is interested in something like that? I always paid attention in school, the teacher made me the victim of teacher's pet. As a kid I didn't even know it was a bad thing until some kid beat me up for it in the schoolyard._

 _But you're right you know, my face **is** asymmetrical. The kids latched onto it quickly. I was short, I was blond, I was frail and I had fucked up eyebrows. I was the perfect target. I spoke weirdly and because of that they thought it was okay to pick on me. Watching people in the Baratie, monkey see, monkey do, right? So I had more manners than a kid my age, I ate my lunch in a way that, now that I think about it, probably looked snobbish to others. The staff thought I was the perfect child from heaven or some shit like that. "Look at him, he's so well mannered!" or "he always does his homework and pays attention, isn't he just lovely?" _

_I tried to grow out my hair so that no one could see my eyebrows. The cooks caught on and tried to cut it for me, said it was good for me, that way I could see when I was cooking. I got away half-way through and I ended up with a botched haircut that covered one of my eyebrows. It was uneven but when Zeff saw it, he said it was almost completely hopeless. He evened out my fringe and sent me off to school like that._

 _The old kids kept making fun of my weird eyebrows, said they were a mutation, an abomination. I guess the first place I learnt to fight might've actually been the schoolyard. I needed to do something and I guessed I had something those other kids didn't. I was desperate. I won one fight against this guy who's name I can't even remember now. They left me alone but … the isolation was probably worse than the teasing …_

* * *

"I kept the haircut," Sanji finished. "The cooks were right about one thing. If you can't see past your hair, you can't cook."

Zoro gently rubbed his thumb against Sanji's cheek. "They're beautiful, you know. Your eyes."

"Number fifteen, right?" Sanji said. "You like my eyes."

"I love your eyes," Zoro corrected him. "So what if you look different? It makes you special. I was given shit about my hair and then I beat the crap out of those guys. We're abnormalities. I've been told my hair's a genetic defect."

"At least you can dye your hair, what can I do about my eyebrows?"

"You could shave them off or something." Zoro shrugged. "I don't dye my hair because I like to think of it as an act of rebellion. It irritates the hell out of people, I got in trouble during school because apparently, my hair wasn't natural and so the school president tried to force me to dye it black."

"What did you do?"

"I told him it was my natural hair colour. He didn't believe me so I dragged him into the bathroom and showed him."

"You _what_?!"

"He never questioned it again, that's for sure," Zoro said with a smirk. "Course when I think about it, I think he might've wanted to suck me off right there in the bathroom stall …" He shrugged. "Anyway, we're monsters, aren't we? Crazy hair, fucked up eyebrows. We'll raise hell together, alright?"

Sanji smiled. "Yeah, we will."

* * *

 _Every time I go looking for Luffy and Nami, this guy's here instead._

"Hello Usopp, where's Luffy and Nami today?"

Usopp scratched his long nose for a moment before shrugged. "Dunno, I wanted to see them so I stopped by but the house was empty. I figured I'd stay around a bit longer, they're taking care of Carue after all and I don't want him to starve."

"Carue?"

There was silence and then— "Was that a _duck_?"

Usopp ran his fingers through his unruly hair, laughing nervously. "Yeah, Vivi's going off to a conference where she can't take Carue, so …" He trailed off.

"Who's Vivi?"

"Oh, you never met her?" Usopp said in surprise. "She's Ace's girlfriend." He shrugged. "Well, she hasn't been around recently anyway, so I suppose I shouldn't be too surprised. You wanted to see Luffy and Nami?"

"Uh yeah," Sanji said. He leaned to the side slightly and caught sight of a duck. A duck. Who the fuck kept a duck as a pet? He tried not to be distracted by the new addition to Luffy's home and instead cleared his throat. "It's White Day and I don't really know what to do for it, so uh …" He scratched his head. "I can just wait till Nami and Luffy get back—"

"Oh, you want advice?" Usopp asked with a big grin. "Well, I, Love Expert Usopp, shall help you!" His grin took over half of his face as he pulled Sanji by his arm into the house. "Sit down and we'll talk!"

Sanji took a seat and to his surprise, the duck approached him, taking a seat at his feet. He stared at it. _What do you do with a duck? Do you pet it?_ The duck— Carue, looked up at him with big innocent eyes. _Fuck now I feel guilty for making duck dishes …_

"So Sanji, tell Usopp your love problems!" Usopp said, taking a seat across from Sanji, a large sandwich in his hand. "You know, I've broken a few hearts before I dated Kaya," he bragged. "They were crying for me to take them back but you've met Kaya. Only an idiot would let her go."

"Um, right. So uh about White Day?" Sanji said, feeling awkward.

"Okay now Sanji I need to ask you a very important question before we start and you can't lie," Usopp told him a very serious tone.

 _I'll leave the lying up to you, thanks._

"What's the question?"

"Well you've been dating Zoro for a while, right?" Usopp asked. "How long has it been?"

"Three months," Sanji replied. "About. I don't know, it was end of December when it was official but …" He trailed off. "Anyway, what's that got to do with anything?"

"So I suppose I'll just get straight to the point, yeah?" Usopp asked. Sanji bent down and awkwardly patted Carue on the head. "Have you two done it yet?"

"WHAT?!"

Both Sanji and Carue's eyes widened in surprise. If Sanji had been drinking anything, he'd have probably done a spit take, though he wished he was more refined than that. He spluttered and shot daggers at Usopp, clearing his throat and taking a deep breath. He could handle this like the mature, grown man he was.

"What the fuck makes you think you can ask me such a personal question?!"

 _Or you know, you could do that._

"So?" Usopp pressed.

" _So_ it's none of your business whether or not we've done it yet," Sanji snapped. He knew Nami, Luffy and Usopp were close, which meant that if he admitted it to Usopp, Nami would surely know in no time at all and that was what he was scared of.

"I see …" Usopp stroked a fake beard that he did not have. He didn't even have a stubble. It was rather pathetic. He frowned. "I owe Nami three."

"Huh?"

"She said March, I said June. Thank God she was talking hundreds or else I'd never be able to pay it off. Oh wait, dammit, she always wants triple. Dammit." He shook his head.

"June?" Sanji repeated. "What, you think I'm some sort of prude?"

"No I just— ha! You admitted it!"

 _Fuck!_

Sanji grumbled, crossing his legs and sighed. He made a move to reach for his cigarettes when he remembered he didn't have them anymore. _Double fuck._ "Don't tell Nami," he said. He did not beg, he was above that. Pleading was peasant-like, he had golden buttons on his jacket— blazer, oh fuck, Zoro's talk was starting to leak into him.

"So who was the girl?"

"The girl?" Sanji echoed, slightly in a trance, wondering how mad Zoro would be when he learnt that Nami got wind of their suddenly existent sexual relationship.

Usopp nodded. "You know, like the one on top."

"There's no girl in the relationship," Sanji argued. "We're both men."

"But one of you had to take it up the ass," Usopp pointed out. "So who was it?"

"But that doesn't determine anything!" Sanji protested.

Usopp nodded. "So you were on the bottom. I should've known."

"Fucker, what are you talking about?" he demanded, glaring at Usopp.

"Well, for one thing Sanji, you're shorter than Zoro—"

"By one centimetre!"

"— and you have a lean figure, not to mention you dress better than him. You're always going on about chivalry and stuff like that. Let's be honest, in a fight, Zoro would probably kick your ass—"

"I totally beat him at Partys, weren't' you there?!"

"— and even if that wasn't the case you smell of cologne and all sorts of girly perfumes. You just radiate femininity, you know." He saw the look on Sanji's face. "That's nothing to be ashamed of—"

"I'M NOT A FUCKING GIRL!"

"I never said that," Usopp told him. "It's just you're very feminine. It's like … you leak pheromones or something," Usopp shrugged. "I don't know, I've never been friends with gay people."

"I'm bisexual!" Sanji snapped. "And you told me before, Zoro's been in other relationships. He's spoken to me about it, they were all female—"

"What if one was a transvestite or something?"

"Really Usopp? Really?" Sanji demanded. "Look, I'm not a girl. If I'm feminine so is Zoro. He spends hours in the shower, has an obsession with the way furniture is arranged, does really sappy things and says all that cheesy shit you see in those romantic movies, he doesn't understand the importance and joy of watching anime and he fucking took it up the ass!"

Usopp blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. Then—

"Zoro bottomed?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Never mind, you're clearly no help," Sanji muttered, picking himself up from the couch.

"Hey look, Sanji, I'm sorry," Usopp said, getting up as well. "Maybe I was kinda focusing too much on the fact that you're both men."

"Yes, both _men_ ," Sanji repeated. "None of us are women, we aren't substitutes of a woman, we both have cocks and we both have a fucking prostate. Why can't you just get that? What makes it so that you have to treat a same-sex couple so differently?"

"I'm sorry," Usopp repeated. "Look, I don't know, maybe I'm just not used to it. You're right, there's nothing different about your relationship with Zoro from the relationship I have with Kaya. I'm sorry, I was out of line. I just … it's hard to wrap my head around it, okay? That doesn't excuse anything I've said, but I'm just trying to understand this all. I know that there are some complications and difficulties you guys face unlike a heterosexual couple and I guess I was just focusing on those small differences like how you call each other 'boyfriend' and 'boyfriend' instead of 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend'. I don't know, I just …" Usopp ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't mean anything by it, I just need time to get used to it."

Sanji took a deep breath and sighed. "It's fine," he said. "I've just been stressed lately." He took a seat again and pet Carue. "It's just … Zoro hates Valentine's Day, I know that now, so I don't know if White Day would be any different. Something tells me his attempt at romance is a one time thing, or at least, I shouldn't expect it to become a regular thing." He snorted. "It's a good thing too, he sucks at it. But anyway, I just … Should I just pretend its a normal day? I mean what do you and Kaya do on White Day?"

"Us?" Usopp said. He thought for a moment. "We don't do anything really special, exactly. I mean I get her a card and we spend the whole day together. We do what we each like doing with each other. It's … it's different, to do what you like with someone you like, it makes it the times better. I can't really explain it, but do you get it?"

Sanji nodded slowly. "Yeah, I think I do." He checked his watch and his eyes widened. It was almost two in the afternoon. So much for spending all of White Day with Zoro.

He got up from his seat and gave Carue another pat on the head before apologizing to Usopp, saying he had to get going and left, slamming the door loudly.

Usopp considered telling Nami about the fact that they had done it, but he didn't feel like paying.

 _What she doesn't know won't hurt her._

* * *

 _BANG!_

Sanji's back hit the apartment door and the feel of cold steel pressed against his neck greeted him. He looked up to see Zoro's hazel eyes staring at him with a mischievous smile on his lips. "Don't let your guard down, cook," he said.

 _SMACK!_

Zoro was pushed off of Sanji by a well aimed kick at the man's stomach, forcing him away. Zoro grinned and readied himself.

"Gee, what a warm welcome," Sanji said. "Can I look forward to this every day now?" he asked dryly.

Zoro smirked and lunged forwards for another attack, but Sanji aimed a kick and the sword went flying out of his hands. _Disarm a swordsman and he's useless._ Well, that wasn't true. Zoro had two others swords. Zoro raised them, Wado and Shusui. For some reason, every time he saw Zoro using that black sword, he felt an immense sense of pride wash over him.

Sanji let his hands fall to the ground, lifting his feet and with a fell kick, aimed at Zoro's feet. Zoro jumped and flipped over him, blocking the exit. His arms were crossed over his chest and he was squatting a little. He rose quickly, striking down.

Sanji dodged and flipped back onto the couch. He sighed. "We're getting mud everywhere," he told him. He tried to kick off his shoes but Zoro wouldn't have any of it. Instead he made an attempt at striking Sanji's torso. Sanji bent over backwards, forced into a bridge position before he brought his legs over himself and was standing again. One of his shoes came off, hitting Zoro in the face. There was now a smudge of dirt on his cheek.

Sanji grinned. "Dirty Marimo," he teased.

Zoro rolled his eyes and lunged in again

Sanji blocked using his foot, pressing against Zoro's crossed swords. The swordsman skidded back, then raised his foot, kicking Sanji in the gut to his surprise, causing him to stagger back. He sighed. "And now my blazer's dirty. Want to tell me why we're fighting?"

"Not really," Zoro said with a shrug, coming in for the kill.

Sanji forced himself to use the couch as leverage and catapulted himself over it, kicking fiercely, hitting Zoro square in the jaw.

He took a deep breath, readying his breathing. It was starting to hurt a little. Zoro made an attempt to move in again but Sanji held up his hand. "Wait," he said, his voice sounding slightly hoarse.

Zoro lowered his swords and nodded, waiting.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "Is it another attack?"

Sanji shook his head. "I don't know." He reached out and took Zoro's hand. The swordsman put his sword down slowly as Sanji guided his hand towards his chest. "Is that an adrenaline heart beat?"

Zoro's lips parted slowly, feeling the slightly unsteady rhythm of Sanji's heart under the palm of his hand. He grinned but didn't say anything, instead taking Sanji's hand in his and pressing it to his heart. Racing quickly. "It burns a bit," Zoro told him. "At least, to me." Sanji found his breath caught in his throat. This heart beat … The sign of Zoro being alive, pulsating, beating as quickly as his own. "But it's a good kind of burn. You?"

Sanji nodded, gulping. "Yeah. A good kind of burn."

They continued, throwing kicks and an assortment of sword attacks, stopping on the occasion when Sanji had to stop to breathe and calm his racing heart when he felt he couldn't take it. Zoro would tell him to stop if he started to wheeze and to Sanji's surprise, Zoro could be very patient when he wanted to.

The two of them collapsed on the floor about an hour and a half later, sweat dripping down their foreheads.

"Are you going to explain the fight now, Marimo?" Sanji asked, turning to him.

Zoro brushed aside Sanji's bangs, staring at his eyes. His fingers slowly traced their shape and when Sanji closed them, they skimmed over his eyelids. "You better not poke me in the eye, Marimo," he told him.

"Oh shut up," Zoro told him playfully. "I spoke to Nami today."

"Oh yeah? What'd you talk about?"

"Well, first she yelled at me about the date, saying that I couldn't ignore it and screw it up like I did Valentine's Day."

"You didn't screw it up," Sanji told him. "It was just unconventional. Strange, just like you."

"Hey!"

"You've got green hair, remember? Strange is probably the best way to call it. Peculiar sounds more intriguing though." Sanji laughed. "Remember? We're both monsters."

Zoro nodded. "Well I spoke to Nami about what she did with Luffy for White Day. She said they didn't do much. They just do things they like in each other's company, just … I don't know, being happy that there's someone else near them." Zoro shrugged. "So after she screamed at me that I was wasting the day with her when I should be spending it with you, I ran out of there and came here."

"Oh yeah?" Sanji asked. "And you thought fighting was the best way to spend the day with each other?"

"Well, that and before you came in I was working on a little something," Zoro said. " _Bleach_ , it's another one of those animes of yours, right?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"We're going on another marathon, _Bleach_ edition."

Sanji grinned.

He swore he loved this man.

* * *

The moment it started, Zoro just couldn't shut up.

"What's with the weird buildings?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. Watching anime with Zoro was always amusing to say the least. "That's just the way it is."

"Well that's fucked up. Who's that short person?"

"A person," Sanji replied with a shrug. "You need to watch."

There was silence for a few scenes until—

"Why the fuck is that guy's hair orange?!"

"Why the fuck is your hair green?"

Zoro crossed his arms and grumbled in response. "So why's he beating those guys up? I mean not that he's not great at it, but still." The moment he discovered why, his jaw dropped. "He did it for a fucking translucent girl?"

"She's a ghost," Sanji said. "A soul to be more precise."

"What the fuck was that chain thing in her chest? Is she into bondage or something? And why the fuck can he see her?"

There were various other comments, each getting more amusing than the last.

"Who kicks their son when they first enter the door?"

"Who puts a sword to your throat when you get home?" Sanji countered.

"Those girls are siblings? But they're nothing alike! And why does he have orange hair if his dad's got dark hair and his mom's got brown hair— why the fuck is there a giant poster of his mother?!"

"Wait is that the chick from earlier? Why's she wearing samurai gear? Is that a sword?"

"Why can't his father see her? No one hears him screaming? He hardly stays quiet, and she's pretty loud too! And that was just immature, writing on his face."

"You're telling me a girl that small can take down a monster that big? That's just not possible."

"IS HE AN IDIOT? GOING AT THAT GIANT THING WITH A CHAIR?!"

"Is he suicidal?"

"That has to be the most weird place to end an episode _ever_."

When the credits rolled, Zoro shook his head. "I mean the whole swords are cool, but maybe he's compensating for something? Like maybe, cause her sword was nice and big, it makes up for her small tits and for him he's making up for his small cock? And seriously, what is up with that family?"

Sanji grinned.

Usopp was right. Doing something you liked with the one you liked made it ten times better.

"Next episode?" Sanji asked.

The moment it started, Zoro was confused. "How the fuck does no one know what happened? And how can a girl that small with so little tits be that attractive to everyone? You're telling me no one reads that note she wrote on her hand? It was plain and obvious!"

"Okay who's the girl with the big tits? Is that where the other girl's tits went? No one has big boobs, is this even anime?"

"What are you talking about?" Sanji asked giving him a strange look.

"Isn't it an unwritten rule in anime, female characters have to have a huge rack. But that girl's got nothing and neither does that tomboy!" He frowned. "Wait a minute, is she telling him if he saves one kid, he's got to save all kids in the world? He's only fifteen!" Clearly they had left their past topic.

When that episode was finished, Zoro turned to Sanji. "Why does he have a strawberry for a head?"

Sanji tilted his head. "You kinda have a strawberry shaped head too."

"Liar!" Zoro snapped. "Your head looks like an eggplant though."

"It does not!"

"It so does! Seriously, except for the asymmetrical shit of your face, your head reminds me of an eggplant. Either way, whether or not you recognize your eggplant-shaped head, I do not have a strawberry shaped one, that's just plain stupid. Who on Earth has heads shaped like food anyway? I mean except for you, that is. I think that strawberry could use some anger management classes though and how does he lift a sword that fucking big? It's not natural! And I'm totally right, he's totally compensating—"

"Aishiteru."

"—and then there's that girl's lack of— what did you just say?"

It had been whispered, barely spoken, but Sanji realized he didn't regret it. It had just slipped out, as cliché as it sounded, without his knowledge but he found he meant it. He didn't know when it happened.

It wasn't like in the movies where there was a moment where the world stopped spinning and he just knew he had fallen in love. Rather, it was more like it had happened gradually, slowly and it was at that moment that he realized he could tell Zoro he loved him with no regrets, when her realized he meant it. When he realized he was already in love. Maybe that's why they called it falling, you feel nothing as you float down to the bottom and once you hit the rock hard ground, that's when you realize you're already in love and at that point, no ladder, no rescue team can possibly get you out.

He knew if someone asked him why he loved Zoro he would never manage to come up with an answer. It was a combination of things, he couldn't pinpoint what it was exactly that made him fall in love with him, it was just … everything about him. It was a process that started slowly and silently, without your knowledge. By the time you were finally made aware it was too late.

Perhaps other people had a more romantic story than meeting their first love at a restaurant where they worked. Maybe the story was better than saying you were an abused, misunderstood man who had smoked one too many cigarettes. Maybe they had stories about beautiful courtship rather than a kidnapping and horrible soup being shoved down their throat. Not everyone's love story had the words "kidnap" and "house arrest" included in them. The word "blackmail" certainly only made its way into few relationships and those ended with restraining orders and court. Sanji was probably the only one who had Random Word Association, cooking lessons at four in the morning, Kendo tournaments, getting rich off of beating each other up and several trips to the hospital. But maybe that's what made their relationship unique.

He and Zoro were monsters, as he said. The love story between two monsters could hardly be normal, could it?

Sanji tore his gaze away from Ichigo as he went on a rant about brothers and sisters and how sibling relationships worked to see Zoro, still stunned and speechless. He didn't regret it, not at all.

Zoro was strange to say the least. He had a bad temper, he raised his voice, he was impatient. He was loud and a bit annoying, he couldn't cook to save his life, he had horrible social skills. He used to drink excessively, had an unhealthy dedication to his swordsmanship, acted like a dog in heat. He used the most stupid shampoo, had no fashion sense, couldn't walk in a straight line without getting lost, was rude, crude and Ace was kind of right, he did remind Sanji of a ballerina on the occasion.

But Zoro was so many things other than that and it was those strange quirks he had, including playing with the drawstrings of his sweatpants, that just helped Sanji fall even more in love with him.

Sanji knew this wasn't gratitude for helping him escape. This was deeper. Gratitude didn't mean you kissed each other, didn't mean you started a relationship. Being grateful didn't lead to buying someone a sword for his birthday or wanting to hear him say "I love you". Gratefulness wasn't going to bed with someone who helped you heal.

He had already known that he was grateful to Zoro, but in the seven months he had known him it had gradually changed into something else, something deeper.

"Aishiteru," Sanji repeated.

Zoro continued to gape, staring at him unblinkingly.

"This wasn't exactly the reaction I was expecting," Sanji admitted, letting out a nervous chuckle.

Had Zoro changed his mind? Had he decided he didn't want Sanji? Fear rose up in Sanji's chest, constricting painfully. Oh God, was he going to have another attack?

Zoro shook his head. "No, I didn't hear you say that, you're kidding, you're joking, I'm hallucinating."

"Why is it that every time I tell you something serious, you think you're hallucinating?" Sanji asked, tilting his head to the side slightly. "I think there's a problem with that."

"But I have to be, because you didn't just say—"

"Aishiteru."

"That! You did not just say that!"

"I did," Sanji said. "Do I need to say it again? Aishiteru."

Zoro covered his ears in a rather childlike manner. "I'm not listening, lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Honestly …" He took Zoro's hands in his own and gently pulled them off of his ears, making sure to brush his earrings. He pressed his forehead against Zoro's, breathing softly. "If you don't give me an answer soon, I might start to panic," he said in a gentle voice. "Might even have an attack … Do I need to take it back?"

Zoro covered Sanji's mouth with his hand, shaking his head profusely. It wasn't as though Sanji would take it back, that would just be stupid. He found the way Zoro's eyes widened in panic was adorable, a strange word to use for a brute like Zoro. "No, you can't take it back."

"Why not?" Sanji teased, making sure his tongue licked his palm as he spoke against his hand.

Zoro shivered visibly. "B-because, it's already out there."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Oh God, it's already out there, what are we going to do, it's already out there!" He finished his quick rant by licking the palm of Zoro's hand, making sure to maintain eye contact the whole time. Zoro's eyes widened and his cheeks started to flame red.

Sanji moved his head slightly and took Zoro's thumb into his mouth, sucking gently. He ran his tongue over the nail and bit softly, teasingly. Zoro's lips parted slowly, pulling his hand away from his mouth and instead replaced it with his own lips.

Sanji smirked against his lips, pulling him closer. The loud crashes of the battle on screen were forgotten as Zoro pulled Sanji into his lap. Supporting him by holding his hip with one hand and his neck in his other, Zoro let Sanji take control. Sanji's legs wrapped around Zoro's waist and with the slight height advantage he earned by being in Zoro's lap, he pulled Zoro's head upwards by tugging at his hair. Zoro let out a gasp and submitted to him, letting his hands grip him tightly as Sanji's moved under Zoro's shirt, feeling his muscles under his fingertips. He would never get bored of this man's body, it was perfect.

Sanji pulled away, breaking the kiss, breathing hard. "Aishiteru," he whispered softly.

"Aishiteru," Zoro repeated in the same quiet voice.

Sanji leaned against Zoro's sturdy frame, letting his head rest in the crook of the green-haired man's neck. "Zoro?"

"Yeah?"

"You know that thing you said? About the sex addiction?"

Zoro chuckled. "You want it?"

"Badly," Sanji admitted.

"Come on," Zoro said, giving Sanji a slight push off of him. Zoro stood and held out his hand to Sanji. "If we do it here, you're going to break my back."

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "Do you … do you not like it this way?"

Zoro gave him a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

"I mean …" Sanji closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "When I was … When I was r-raped—"

"Sanji don't," Zoro interrupted him. "Please, don't. It still hurts you, I don't want to see you cry."

"Bastard," Sanji snapped, blinking harshly. "I'm not going to cry, fucking Marimo." He took a deep breath once more and Zoro remained silent as he tried to collect himself. "I mean when it happened, I … I didn't like it. I … " He shook his head. "I hated it, how can you stand it?"

Zoro sat back down on the couch and ran his fingers through Sanji's hair, pressing him against his chest. "Sanji? Can I ask you something?"

"What?" His voice sounded so small, even to his own ears.

"Did you trust those cooks?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Bastard, what the fuck are you talking about?"

"Did you trust them?" Zoro repeated.

"Fuck no," Sanji snapped.

"That's the difference."

"What do you mean?" Sanji asked in a quiet voice, looking up at Zoro, trying to hold back tears. Usopp's words were brought back to him. He said he was feminine. And here he was, completely disproving the point Sanji had tried so hard to get across to him about there being no female in the relationship. He was being a fucking pansy, wasn't he? So close to crying …

"I know you Sanji. This isn't the same as rape, it isn't. This is consensual, trust me." Zoro took a deep breath. "I don't mind doing it like this, I like it like this, because it's you Sanji. I wouldn't even think of doing it again if I didn't like it. I trust you." He bit his bottom lip. "And, when you trust me enough, we'll try it again. The other way around. If we do it that way and you don't like it, we won't do it again. And if that day never comes, then that's okay too."

"Liar," Sanji said. "You so want to do it that way."

Zoro gave him a small smile. "Yeah, I do." Sanji was surprised he admitted it so easily. "But I don't want to do it if you don't want it. I told you, I'm not going to force you into anything Sanji, I'm not after your body and your soul and whatever fucked up demon possession sounding shit people say that's supposed to be romantic. I need someone for national holidays who can tie my tie, or let me beat them up to bond. I'm not in it for your ass. As sexy as it is," he added with a smirk.

Sanji nodded slowly. "One more thing," he said softly. "If you still want to do it after we're done, that is."

"You're so naive, Sanji," Zoro said with a light chuckle. "I'm always going to want you."

"Big words," Sanji told him. "Can you back them up?"

"You're beautiful," was Zoro's response.

Sanji didn't believe him. Not yet. But he was so fucking close.

"I went to talk to Nami and Luffy today," he said. "And I got into a talk with Usopp." He bit his bottom lip. "And he said … he said that there was a girl in our relationship."

"Usopp's full of shit."

"I know he's a liar," Sanji said, worried by the way Zoro's brow was furrowing and his fists were clenching. "But I mean …" He bit his bottom lip. "I just … What if he's right?"

"Sanji, do I look like a woman?"

"What kind of a fucking question is that?!" Sanji demanded.

"Answer the question."

"Well, no …" Sanji looked away from him, trying not to blush. "There's no fucking way anyone can confuse you with a woman. But—"

"Next question. Sanji, do you look like a woman?"

"No, but—"

"Then that's all there is to it," Zoro cut him off. "You're not a woman, I'm not a woman. We've both got dicks, we both have balls and we're both in a relationship with each other. Simple as that."

"You over-simplify everything," Sanji said.

"It saves me from worrying about things like you do," Zoro said, musing Sanji's hair playfully. "Now that that's all sorted out, how about we go to the bed?"

Sanji nodded, picking himself up off the couch.

* * *

When they entered the bedroom, Zoro pushed Sanji onto the bed slowly, towering over him. Sanji tensed. He loved Zoro, he really did, he wouldn't have said it otherwise, but being taken like this … He shut his eyes tightly, breathing deeply. He could be calm, he could handle it. If Zoro wanted to switch places, he'd deal with it.

There was a tight knot in the pit of his stomach, causing his breathing to come out laboured as he tried to calm himself down.

 _Think of something else, think of something else. Preheat the oven to 200˚ C, combine panko and oil in a pan, toast over medium heat until golden—_

"Sanji?"

Sanji sucked in a deep breath. "Yes?"

"What are you doing?"

Sanji opened his eyes to find that Zoro was sitting on the back of his legs, which were on either side of Sanji, about half of Zoro's weight on Sanji's stomach. He was giving Sanji a strange look, obviously confused by the cook's behaviour.

"Recipes," Sanji blurted out.

"Huh?"

God he looked adorable like that.

"Never mind," Sanji said, shaking his head. "Aren't we going to do it?"

"You're tense," Zoro said. "And you look like you're bracing yourself for death. Is it really that horrible?" He shook his head. "We don't have to do this, you know. If you think we've been doing it too much, we can stop."

Sanji raised an eyebrow, eyeing the bulge in Zoro's pants. "Oh really?"

Zoro blushed. "Yeah, I can take care of myself," he said, his face flushed.

"It's just … different," Sanji said instead of voicing his fears of being taken. "You're on top." All the past times they had done it, not only had Sanji been the one in charge, but he was always above Zoro. The first time on the bed, Zoro had been sprawled out on his back with Sanji above him, in the kitchen he had stood behind him while Zoro had been leaning. There had always been a definite of who was on top.

"Do you … not like it?" Zoro asked in a voice that Sanji would've labeled as shy, had it not been Zoro Roronoa.

"No, it's fine," Sanji said and he found that, seeing Zoro look at him with those beautiful hazel eyes, it really was fine. He was overthinking things, he could handle it. He trusted Zoro. "You can keep going."

Zoro nodded and slipped off his shirt before lowering himself on Sanji. He pushed up Sanji's shirt, bunching it up. Sanji decided not to tell him he'd be ironing it out when this was over. Zoro began to kiss Sanji's stomach and almost immediately, Sanji sucked in a breath.

 _Close your eyes, count to ten, it'll be over before you know it._

Zoro's tongue poked through Sanji's navel and the blond let out a gasp. Shit. Zoro grinned against his skin. His hands went lower to Sanji's buckle, swiftly undoing it. He released him from his boxers and proved once more that he had no gag reflex, taking all of him in one go.

Sanji gritted his teeth as Zoro bobbed up and down on his cock, looking at him through his lashes. The eye contact made it all the more intense as Zoro hummed, the vibrations causing Sanji to shudder. Zoro pulled back, leaving only the head in his mouth before he took it all in again, swallowing, his throat constricting around Sanji.

"Hah …" Sanji tried to catch his breath, but his attempts were futile. "Ngh …"

The now familiar feeling of release approaching reached him and he shut his eyes tightly. "Christ," he gasped, letting his fingers thread through Zoro's hair. "Zoro, I'm gonna …"

At that moment, Zoro pulled his mouth off of him, grinning mischievously.

"Fucking bastard," Sanji growled.

Zoro got off the bed, unbuttoning his pants and unzipping quickly, his pants becoming a pile on the floor. "I'm going to try something, okay?"

Sanji nodded. Instead of fear of having Zoro inside of him, he felt … a thrill. Anticipation. It was like it didn't matter that Zoro would be the one on top, Sanji knew he wouldn't regret it this way either.

And then Zoro totally surprised him.

Instead of spreading the lube he had quickly gotten from the nightstand drawer onto his fingers to prep Sanji, he pushed two fingers into himself. He sat on the bed with his legs spread wide open, thrusting two fingers deep inside of him, trying to pick up the pace.

"Fuck, how do you do this?" he demanded. "It's fucking tight," he moaned as he pushed in a third finger.

There was something about watching Zoro fuck himself that was so erotic. Sanji licked his lips, watching as Zoro's cheeks became flush and the swordsman's head tilted back and he let out an assortment of curse words and grunts. He yelped in surprise when he hit his prostate. "Fuck, I could cum from this alone," he admitted. He pulled his fingers out of himself though and poured more lube onto them before wrapping his hand around Sanji's cock, stroking him.

"Do you want me to move?" Sanji asked, now assured they were doing this the same way they had first done it and for some reason, he found himself feeling … a little disappointed?

"No," Zoro said. "Stay right where you are."

Sanji nodded, but gave him a strange look as Zoro then lifted himself off the bed and then to Sanji's shock, lowered himself onto Sanji's lubed member.

He watched as Zoro's ass swallowed his cock and Zoro put his hands on Sanji's chest to steady himself. Oh God, he was in deep, deeper than he was pretty sure he had been before.

"Fuck," Zoro hissed.

Sanji sucked in a breath, trying to breathe and failing miserably. This was … this was …

Zoro began to move slowly, grinding against him. Sanji's head tossed back as he moaned loudly. He wouldn't be surprised if the neighbours knew what they were doing, apartment walls were thin. He took a deep breath as Zoro continued to grind. He leaned down and claimed Sanji's lips with his own, using Sanji's slightly parted lips to his advantage, taking control of the kiss.

He parted from Sanji and then the blond was in for another surprise when Zoro, using his arms, pushed himself up before lowering himself back down onto Sanji.

Zoro Roronoa was fucking himself on Sanji's cock.

Sanji knew he was the only one to ever get to see such a sight, the only one who had ever seen Zoro's brow furrow in concentration, his chest heave with each breath he took as he used his hands for leverage, while at the same time trying not to put too much of his weight on Sanji. No one had ever seen the way Zoro's eyes rolled to the back of his head as Sanji hit his prostate.

Sanji's hips bucked forward in time with Zoro's thrust. He wasn't going to lie. It was clumsy at first but they eventually developed a rhythm, with sweat dripping down his forehead, Sanji watched in amazement as Zoro took control, timing the thrusts. Being underneath Sanji - well, actually, he wasn't _under_ him, technically, if anything he was on top, but it brought new realization to his eyes.

Just because one gave up the "man" role of the act, that didn't give them any less power than the one in "control". It really did feel like they were equal as Zoro panted, his skin gleaming with sweat as he controlled the situation, he decided how far Sanji penetrated him, he decided the pace, he was in control in every sense of the word. He didn't lay down flat for anyone, but he didn't take the power from anyone either. It was complicated and Sanji couldn't wrap his head completely around it, but this ... This was so different from what had happened with those damn cooks. This was what it should be like and Sanji realized, this was what it would always be like, if he played his cards right.

He had decided it.

No matter what happened, Sanji was never letting this man go. He wouldn't let him get away, not if he had any say in it and considering the way his life was going, it seemed that was exactly how it was.

"Sanji," Zoro breathed heavily, "I'm ... I'm so close ..."

"Me too," Sanji admitted, his head tossing back as he watched Zoro speed up, trying to find release.

Zoro truly was beautiful when he came. His head tossed back, his lips parted slightly, his entire body tensed and a sound that was something between a moan and a cry escaped those gorgeous lips. His cum splattered over his chest as Sanji watched, entranced in the way that hazel eyes opened hazily when he was done and he licked his lips. Sanji came with full force inside of him and let himself fall back, taking a deep breath.

* * *

Zoro got off of him slowly before down next to him. He reached out and wrapped an arm around Sanji.

"You're sticky," Sanji said in a soft voice.

"Don't leave,."

Sanji's eyes widened in surprise. "What?"

"The first time ... You left," Zoro said. "I woke up alone."

"I was in the kitchen-"

"I don't care," Zoro cut him off. "I don't care," he repeated softly. "Just stay. My bed's too big for me."

"Whose fault is that?"

"Don't tease," Zoro told him, frowning..

"I'm kidding, you know I love you Marino."

Zoro nodded. "I know. And I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you don't regret saying that."

Sanji looked him in the eyes. "Zoro," he said in serious voice, "I've done many things I've regretted in my life. My inability to stand up, how I wasn't able to help Moodie, how I never managed to say thank you enough to Zeff, that I've never known my parents, that I've hurt myself, that I couldn't cope in a better way, that I didn't get help when I needed it, that I was too proud to ask for it when it was what I desperately needed. The way I first treated you, my first time ..." He shut his eyes tightly, trying to push away the memories. Zoro rubbed his arm gently in a way that was slightly comforting and yet at the same time incredibly awkward. A ghost of a smile surfaced on Sanji's lips. "I admit it. You told me you've never done anything you've ever regretted. I can't say the same. But I can tell you this." Sanji took a deep breath. "There's not a single thing in these past few months with you I've ever regretted. The only thing I regret is that I didn't start dating you sooner."

"You know I meant it too," Zoro said softly. "When I told you."

"I know." Sanji grinned. "Funny enough, for my birthday ... I actually wanted you to tell me you loved me. I didn't expect you to tell me that. I thought daisuki would've been the best I would've gotten, I just ... I don't know, I needed to hear you say it, to ow you weren't around because you felt bad or anything ..."

"I don't feel bad," Zoro said. "Well, I mean I do, what happened to you was horrible," he corrected himself, "but I mean I don't feel bad for you in the sense that it would make me feel obligated to start a relationship with you. I mean ... You're my first everything."

"With a man," Sanji corrected him. "First with a man. You can't honestly tell me you' re never fallen in love before?"

"I have," Zoro admitted and suddenly, Sanji felt a stab of jealousy. "But only once before. It didn't end well."

"Was it with that girl?"

"Who?"

"Don't say who all innocent, you know who I'm talking about. That girl you dated who ..." He trailed off.

"Sanji," Zoro said with a grin, "I can't even remember her name right now."

"Liar."

"Alright fine, I remember her name," Zoro conceded. "It's burned into my mind, it's the first thing I think of when I wake up, last thing before I go to bed. Well actually, that's been changing lately. She had dark hair, I've found that recently, blond's been invading my thoughts." He gave Sanji a look. "Do you want me to forget her?"

Sanji thought about it.

 _Did_ he want Zoro to forget this woman? He saw the way Zoro's eyes lit up with a bittersweet sadness, nostalgia and wonder, dream-like. He'd always smile when he mentioned her, he really seemed to cherish her. His sword, Waro, who had belonged to her, he worshiped it, took the best care of it out of all his swords. There was a deep sadness in his eyes, one that pained Sanji to see, like Zoro was lost far away in a world where he didn't know Sanji, a world that Sanji would never know because he had never known her.

Sanji shook his head. "No," he said finally. "I don't want you to forget her. She's a part of you, clearly. I think it might kill you if you forgot her." He bit his lip. "I'm not going to ask you to forget your past Zoro, I'm not going to tell you to only think of me. I'm not that selfish and besides, I'd feel weird and clingy if I did. But ... I ... I want to be a part of you too." Sanji couldn't help blushing as he said it.

"You're moving in," Zoro declared.

"I thought I've been living her for seven months."

"No, I mean get all your shit and get your fucking white ass in here by noon tomorrow."

"What?"

Zoro shrugged. "Well, if my nights keep ending like this I think it'd be stupid for you to have your stuff in the guest bedroom. Any objections?" There was the slightest hint of nervousness at the end of his question.

Sanji took a long time pretending to decide. "I don't have an objection so much as a condition."

"And what's that?"

"Never call refer to my buttocks as white ass again."

"Did you just say buttocks?"

"Zoro."

Zoro laughed.. "Okay sure, Curly Brow."

When Sanji 's eyes closed that night, he thought about it.

Maybe if it was Zoro, he could surrender his body in that way again. Maybe. But only if it was Zoro.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank yous!_

 _Cara-Dolce : I have this deep loving for long reviews so thank you so much for the fact that your review was so long, the e-mail I got notifying me that the review had to be cropped cause it was too long! So those questions ... Do you want answers to them because you weren't very specific about 'em ... I just knew I wanted to have another sex scene in the kitchen because Sanji had a bad experience there and I wanted Zoro to replace it with something better. Plus the idea of Zoro physically having to bend over was beyond sexy to me and I didn't really get to meddle with dirty talk for the first time. I like dirty talk, personally, I don't know why, I like stories that include it, but I don't usually like BDSM, which is annoying since that's usually what you get with it. BDSM is always wondering whether it's consensual or not, and pardon me, but non-consent is NOT arousing, it's just plain disturbing and wrong. Now, I've said before and I'll say it again: there will be both SanZo and ZoSan in this story, it will be written, it will be read, I will enjoy it, someone will come in while I'm writing the scene and I'll feel awkward but I'll push through and publish again._

 _JustCallMeLucie : Sanji got out of Zoro's death grip and got dressed (because he sleeps shirtless and he was naked in the bed, he still feels uncomfortable being completely shirtless around Zoro) and made breakfast. That's why he was wearing a tie, and because Zoro had to fumble with it (because it's adorable) and ties are sexy on Sanji. Now I know there's been a lot of smut recently, and I know you've said you don't really read it, which is fine, but you're in luck, the next few chapters don't have any smut planned in them._

 _Random Person: I think it's inevitable. I dorkafy all the characters I write about. The coolest character I ever created who wasn't from a fanfiction was a science obsessed genius with an ego a thousand times the size of Texas and he didn't look like a science geek, he was that person who makes being smart look cool, but he's a closet geek obsessed with **Doctor Who**. Yup, I made him a nerd. He's the one who knows everything about the Doctor and **Star Trek**._

 _lilcutieprincess : I came across this scene in a book I was reading (Gansett Island series, Book 2 **, Fool for Love** , I'm totally obsessed with these iBooks, you don't understand) where these two people were having sex and then the girl's just like, "Do you have any hobbies?" and the guy said "Are we really talking about this now? I'll tell you when we're done." And she was like, "Nope, I'm not giving you any until you tell me." And I really wanted to do something like that so that lead to them talking about Luffy. I swear, Zoro will never be able to look at Luffy again and Sanji'll get hard every time he uses olive oil._

 _KleinXDgirl : Oh my God, that is hilarious! You're totally right. I kinda feel like I need to rewrite that chapter now and have Nami walk in on them! Oh God, that'd be priceless! If it doesn't turn up in this story, it will in another, definitely and I'll credit the chapter to you, I swear, oh my God, I'm still laughing!_

 _Shizuka Taiyou : Hmmm... I know (recently cause you know, met Chopper, little reindeer made me cry and my cat was sick at the time so I was like, "animals totally get to me". Also, it's so weird when he, the adorable reindeer with the cute voice, swears. I think it's so strange ... He and Usopp for some reason are characters in my mind who are not allowed to swear. Don't ask me why.) that Sanji has never gotten sick. I don't know about Zoro though. These are good ideas, but I'm going to have to say it'll have to be in another story. I think I'll be sticking to AUs now though ..._

 _theLoveablelyLovelyNinja: If you read my ANs, you know that this is my first ever endeavour in something like this. In **One Piece** , in AUs for anime, in rape, in sex scenes, in building a relationship that started thanks to a kidnapping and such, fight scenes, you have no idea how happy I am you like it! I felt stupid for making Sanji not understand French once I learnt that basically all of his attacks were in French, but I've personally seen too many blonds speak French (they made Draco speak French in this awesome Harry/Draco story I read. Also, they assume Remus is French for some reason?) so I changed it up. Marimo talking in French, new change of pace, something fresh._

 _Nachtwolke : I personally prefer Zoro topping, but I don't mind either. I find that djs (cause I can't write out the full name cause I can't pronounce it or anything, but I read TONS of it) show more ZoSan and then fanfictions (or the ones I read) have a lot of SanZo. I don't really care, as I've said before, but I like it when they both get a turn above all things just because that's flexibility and yeah ... And yeah, the Zoro I have in my head (who I keep in my pocket and bring to school and force him to share my pink locker, which I don't like because I HATE PINK! but anyway, yeah ...) is the most embarrassing person in the whole world, which makes up for my embarrassingness and then I feel less awkward and then I realize how awkward I'd have to be to make Zoro this awkward and realize that no, I'm still the most awkward._

 _Okay question time!_

 _Here's the thing, I mentioned before I'm interested in writing a few other stories for One Piece. I'll give you titles and brief summaries and you tell me which story you want me to start on next, yeah?_

 _Okay, here we go, there's a few. Not all are for Zoro and Sanji. Actually, there's only one that's not them, so let's start with that._

 _ **Money Can't Buy:** a story about Nami and Luffy! Yay, straight couples! (I appreciate both) In which Luffy meets Nami, he is a pirate, she is not. She wants to fight against Arlong and the strange man in the straw hat seems more than willing to help for no price whatsoever?!_

 _ **Haircuts Change Lives:** I hate this title, I'll probably change it, but it'll be based on the occupations Oda said the straw hat pirates would have if they weren't pirates. Zoro Roronoa is an officer who is being sent to the Baratie, a salon to get a haircut because his boss thinks he's scaring people and there's a strange blond man doing his hair who seems to be nice to women, but is rude to him._

 _ **Like Heroin:** Zoro is a detective who is investigating a drug deal thing (I don't know much about drugs, I will work on this, if I do this one next, I need to do research, a lot of it) and it turns out that Sanji had unknowingly been buying his cigarettes from a drug dealer. Zoro wants Sanji's help to infiltrate the operation, but maybe there's something more than a strange partnership developing between the two?_

 _ **Of Denial, Crookedness & Sexy Therapists**: Ace thinks Sanji is gay, so he sends him to a support group for closeted gays. Sanji is not gay, he likes smooth skin and curvy hips. He is not gay. But that green haired therapist sure is sexy ... That doesn't mean he's gay though, right? Right?_

 _ **Poison** : Sex friends with your best friend from childhood whom you're in love with. This can only end badly for one Zoro Roronoa._

 _ **Ten Count** : A story based off a manga I read and adored about a man who has mysophobia (the fear of germs) and a the therapist who falls in love with him and tries to help him overcome his fear. It won't be entirely like the manga (mainly cause I can't find chapter 23, which pisses me off, but yeah, I want to try an adaptation of sorts._

 _ **The Yakuza's Son** : Sanji's having a shitty day, and the fact that some idiot ran over his last pack of cigarettes is doing nothing to improve his mood. When the strangely green-haired man gets out of his car to yell at him, Sanji just snaps. How was he supposed to know the shitty Marimo was the heir to the yakuza?!_

 _Now my question to you: after **Beautiful Disaster** , which of these stories do you think I should work on first?_

 _One more question: there was a reference in here to another anime which I don't own, when Zoro spoke about his hair. **Can you tell me which anime it's from and which character Zoro was imitating?**_

 _Okay, said it at the top, I'm going to say it again. I have a poll on my profile which asks which of these stories you want most to be published after **Beautiful Disaste** r, their descriptions are there too. Please vote!_


	37. Superheroes

_**Author's Note** : Okay, oh my God, I'm on this chapter! So here's the deal, I didn't super check this thing over, when the story's done each chapter will be revised once more, just so you know. I didn't mean to make people assholes in this story, but it turned out that way. I hoped I didn't screw them up too badly. All of the characters are a bit out of character, even for an AU, but I hope you don't hate me for it! I don't own **One Piece** , but I am progressing slowly but surely to watching more. Also, there is a poll up on my profile for which story I'll write next. It'll be open until January. I highly recommend you listen to this song because I love it and it's awesome and I chose these songs because of how much I find they fit, so I would appreciate if you checked them out._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 37: Superheroes

 _When you've been fighting for it all your life  
_ _You've been struggling to make things right  
_ _That's how a superhero learns to fly  
_ _(Every day, every hour  
_ _Turn the pain into power)_

 _—_ The Script, _Superheroes_

* * *

"No."

"But I didn't say anything yet!"

"You didn't have to, I can tell by looking at you I won't like what you have to say."

Zoro sighed. "How is that even fair?"

"Life isn't fair," Sanji pointed out.

"At least hear me out—"

"I can already see what you're saying," Sanji told him, opening the fridge. "And I don't like what you're saying."

"Oh, so now you're a mind reader?" Zoro rolled his eyes. "So then what am I saying?"

Sanji sighed. "You're saying that you've known me since the beginning of August about, right? And I've been living with you for nearly six months. I've been to the Baratie once since I've started living with you and from what Moodie told you during your visit, it went less than perfectly. You hate the bastard cooks over there, but you still think I need to get myself organized because in all the time I've been staying here, I haven't gotten a single pay-check and that's a bit weird. You think I should really go over there and figure out whether or not I still have a job, for starters and you're getting curious about this Zeff person who never seems to be around." Sanji placed the milk and eggs on the table. "Is that about right?"

Zoro gaped.

"I'm right, aren't I?" Sanji sighed. "To answer the questions and/or statements of yours, the trip to the Baratie I made in November went rather badly, yes. I got into a fight with Patty and had a few nightmares about it. No, it's not as bad as you're probably thinking, worst he did was nearly choke me. He was in a public place after all, though he has little restraint it's still there. Zeff hasn't been in the restaurant in nearly half a year, he's busy off somewhere, last time I checked, it was India. A food convention or something, he sends the pay-checks through the mail to the Baratie. The cooks are forced to give me my share, but since Zeff hasn't been there and I haven't been there either, they're probably having fun off of my money. Now, if you didn't turn up to a kendo tournament for about a year, say, they'd think you'd have quit, wouldn't they? So tell me Zoro, am I right in assuming that the end of this conversation you wanted me to have with you would be you asking me to go to the Baratie and deal with the cooks?"

Zoro's mouth opened and closed like a gaping fish once more. "I- I …" He couldn't seem to find words.

"I don't want to go Zoro, and you're not going to force me," Sanji told him, taking a bowl and cracking an egg swiftly into it. "Now hand me the whisk— the wires that make a weird dome shape— and I'll make you scrambled eggs."

Zoro got the whisky thing and took his seat at the kitchen table. He waited, thinking to himself.

Zoro knew he was right. Sanji really did need to go back. He could admit that his abduction hadn't been the most planned out thing he had ever done before, but there was always a time that came where someone had to face the music and after nearly half a year of avoiding the topic, it was about time Sanji faced them again.

What Zoro had seen was amazing. It was a complete transformation that had him utterly speechless.

If he remembered Sanji from when he first met him, he remembered a lanky, tall blond man who claimed not to be a waiter, but a cook in the kitchen. The assistant cook on top of it all. He was careful and calculating as he walked around the room and ket his head down, trying to ignore all others who were around him. He had seen Sanji has a man who was a chain-smoker who enjoyed the ladies and in a few mere hours, his opinion on the blond changed when he saw Patty strike him.

It seemed every time he saw Sanji at the Baratie, a new kind of anger boiled inside of him. At the beginning, he thought the man was a pain in the ass and then after an attempt to speak to the head chef, he was replaced with an anger towards the obese man who was towering over the blond. His next visit, the way Sanji knew that Zoro knew and yet tried to pretend as though everything was normal… Fuck, it had pissed him off.

Each visit, trying to get something new out of the cook, make him speak, make him talk, make him confide in him. Instead, he got cryptic answers and an empty wallet for his efforts.

Then when he had abducted him, he watched as Sanji changed before his very eyes, even if the man himself didn't realize it.

The way Sanji had learnt to lean into Zoro's touch, the flinches came less and less as time wore on. The way he learnt to smile again and not that overly fake smile that he flashed to customers. When he laughed for the first time, when he directed that genuine smile towards _Zoro_. He watched as Sanji learnt to fight with him for the remote, for control over the TV, for space in the kitchen. How he learnt that he could step inside Zoro's room without worrying too much, the way he learnt he could talk freely again. He wasn't even sure if Sanji knew himself the moment when he seemed to walk like he was on air, when he looked as though all of his horrible tragedies in the past were gone. He didn't know, did he? The moment Sanji learnt how to breathe again, learnt how to live again, that he wasn't just getting by, that he was living, he was alive, he was free and he was a human being who had his rights, had his own chance at life, who was able to do as he wished without any restraints.

Seeing the transformation was beautiful. It was like watching someone being born again and he was, Sanji was free.

Zoro knew there were still insecurities in Sanji's mind, there was no doubt, it was impossible to go through what he had without being a little paranoid. But the time it took to convince him to stay became shorter, he became more trusting. The fact that he trusted Zoro … It meant everything to the swordsman.

It took a lot to get Sanji's self-esteem to what Zoro wanted it to be. He remembered seeing Sanji and watching his carefree attitude, the way he had held his cigarette lazily, the way his eyes seemed slightly lidded, the casual, polite way he spoke. The way he walked, the way he chose his words. At the very first glance of seeing him, he had looked so cocky, so arrogant. Once he opened his mouth for an extended period of time, you realized the reality was far from it.

Zoro wanted to see Sanji like he had first thought he was. He wanted to see Sanji arrogant, cocky, self-assured. He wanted to see the blond ask for what he wanted, take what he wanted. He wanted to see a cook who fought for what he believed in, who didn't back down because of insecurities, who realized he was worth it, that he deserved so much more than the cards he had been dealt.

And he could see it happening, could see the potential as Sanji seemed to grow before him. He didn't believe Sanji would ever learn to be selfish, there was no way. Sanji knew far too well what it was like to have nothing which meant he'd never dare take from anyone. But he had to know it was okay to make Zoro spoil him, Zoro wanted to spoil him, wanted Sanji to realize that he would never be without, not as long as he had Zoro.

"Eat up Marimo," said Sanji, breaking through Zoro's thoughts, placing a plate before him. "And uh, something you ought to know," he added, "Nami might … possibly know about the whole … uh … thing."

"What thing?" asked Zoro through a mouthful of food, which came out sounding like, "wut fing?"

"The uh …" Sanji coughed into his arm.

"Wut?"

"The hmmhmm thing," Sanji repeated, covering his mouth with his hand.

"Hanji, till 'e!" (Sanji, tell me!)

"Sex thing, alright?!" Sanji snapped. "Nami might know about the sex, okay?!"

Zoro gulped down his food, feeling as though it was suddenly too much to swallow. His face paled as Sanji fiddled with a napkin at the edge of the table. He put his fork down and took a deep breath.

"Zoro, don't freak out alright?" asked Sanji in a voice that was desperately trying to sound calm. "It isn't that big of a deal, right? I mean, I think Luffy talks a bit too much of his sex life sometimes. For an oblivious guy, he doesn't hold back much, does he?" Sanji let out a nervous laugh. "Zoro?"

"Hmm?" Zoro didn't trust himself to speak.

"Are you okay?" Sanji asked worriedly. "You've gone really quiet."

"Fine." His tone was clipped, abrupt, short.

"You sure? Because I mean, I personally don't think it's any of their business about what we do and don't do, right? We can just ignore them and all, or you could walk 'em with your swords or I could kick them and they could just forget and— Zoro, you're starting to breathe weirdly, it's freaking me out. Do we need to send you to the hospital?"

Zoro pushed out his chair, put his utensils on his plate and stood up. He pushed his chair in roughly and turned around, grabbing the house phone. With more force than necessary, he pushed at the buttons on the phone.

"Who are you calling?" Sanji's voice was quiet as though he were talking to a wild animal.

"Hospital."

"But I'm fine," Sanji said. "I don't think I'll have another attack, I've been doing well, haven't I?"

"Not for you," Zoro said in a clipped voice.

"Hello, this is the Tokyo General, how may we help you?"

"How good are your doctors at bringing a man back from the brink of death?" asked Zoro, his grip on the phone tightening.

"Um, sir, if there's someone in need of medical care, we advise you bring him in immediately, especially given the condition you're speaking off—"

"Oh, he's not hurt yet," Zoro said calmly. "But he will be soon."

* * *

"WHERE THE FUCK IS USOPP?!"

Luffy and Nami jumped from the couch at the sound of Zoro's loud voice booming through their house.

"Oh, hey Zoro!" greeted Luffy with a big smile. "What's up?"

"Where is he?" demanded Zoro. "Where the fuck is that bastard?!"

"Who ever are you talking about?" asked Nami, fluttering her eyelashes in that innocent way that Zoro had learnt not to trust very early on in his life.

"You know who I'm talking about!" he growled.

Luffy let out a laugh. "Zoro, you look funny like that! Your eyes look like they have steam coming out of them!" He smiled widely. "What'd Usopp do?"

"He told you, didn't he?" asked Zoro, glaring at Nami. "He told you about … _that_."

"You're blushing, Roronoa," Nami teased.

"You know what I'm talking about!" Zoro said.

"Hey, come on Zoro," Sanji cut in, "I didn't say they knew, I said it was possible—"

"She knows," Zoro said, glaring at Nami. "The little bitch knows. She wouldn't be smirking like that if she didn't know."

"Do you have something to hide?" she asked. "A dirty little secret, perhaps?"

"She fucking knows," Zoro insisted, clenching his teeth. God how she pissed him off.

"Actually," Nami said, standing up and walking over to him. "I didn't know. But now I do."

Zoro gaped. _You have got to be fucking kidding me._

"I'll have to call Usopp and collect my money." With that, she went over to kitchen and picked up the phone to dial the long-nosed man's number. Zoro knew the man would be shaking in his boots when the call came. He almost felt bad for him. Almost.

"So you guys did it?" Luffy asked.

Zoro and Sanji both seemed to cough into their hands at the same time. Zoro knew his face was on fire and as for Sanji, he wouldn't doubt it. Nami grinned from the kitchen and winked, as though she knew the pain he planned to cause her for this unfortunate predicament.

"That's none of your fucking business!" Zoro snapped, ears turning red.

"So you did."

"I didn't say that!"

Sanji laughed, rolling his eyes. "You may not have said it, but even Luffy can read between the lines."

Zoro rolled his eyes and sent a glare in Sanji's direction. He paused though when he saw the look on Sanji's face. His brow was furrowed in anticipation, a slight frown on his lips. It seemed as though he was waiting for something, for Luffy to say something and judging by the way Sanji seemed to be bracing himself, it wouldn't be something Sanji liked.

 _What's he thinking about?_

That's when something Sanji had told him the night before stuck him.

 _"He said that there was a girl in our relationship."_

"Hey Luffy," Zoro said, lacing an arm around Sanji's shoulder. "What do you think of our relationship?"

The best way to prove a point to Sanji always seemed to be to have an outsider's perspective and Luffy was just the right person to get it from.

The straw hat gave him a strange look. "What do you mean?"

"I mean what do you think of the relationship Sanji and I have?" Zoro asked. "Do you think there's something's wrong with it? Do you think the power balance between us is uneven? That one's more masculine than the other? C'mon Luffy, tell us what you think."

Sanji gave him a look. _What are you doing?_ he seemed to ask with panicked eyes.

 _Just listen,_ Zoro replied wordlessly. The way Sanji tensed in his hold made Zoro worry but once Luffy started talking, it felt as though Sanji was melting into him with how lax his body became.

"Why are you asking me this Zoro?" Luffy said with his head tilted to the side, rubbing his head in confusion. He shrugged. "I dunno, is there supposed to be something wrong with your relationship? You're dating, right? What's wrong with that? Your power balance? What's that supposed to even mean? We all know Sanji can kick your ass, I think Nami might've made a video of it. But otherwise? I've seen you two spar sometimes, you're pretty equal. I mean you each get each other down just about the same amount of times and you each get up about the same amount of times. As for the masculinity …" Luffy shrugged again. "You're both really feminine you know. Sanji might be lean and have a delicate looking figure, but Zoro, you spend hours when it comes to shopping for your clothes and you're one of the pickiest eaters now a days. What's wrong with your relationship? You both like each other, enjoy spending time in the other's company and you live under the same roof. What's wrong with that?" Luffy shook his head. "Honestly Zoro, I just don't get you sometimes."

Sanji blinked. He looked up at Zoro and grinned. "Okay, point proven."

"Huh?" Luffy scratched his head. "Did I do something?"

* * *

"Not everyone's like Luffy," Sanji pointed out as he drove them back to their apartment. "You know that, don't you?"

"And not everyone's like Usopp," Zoro said. "And besides, Usopp isn't like that anyway, he's just confused. I think he's just like my parents really. When I told them I wanted to learn swordsmanship, they told me to go for it. When I came back from my first lesson though, they took one look at my bruises and how tired I was and told me to quit instantly. They didn't know they were agreeing to. It takes time to warm up to something. We can tell Usopp we're in a relationship and he'll be fine with it. But then there are moments like the one you had yesterday, when he finally realizes what being in a romantic relationship with another man entails and suddenly, he's not so sure he's okay with it. He's fixating on the matters that to people like Luffy, don't matter at all. He just doesn't see the bigger picture yet, but he will. I'm not saying it's going to be perfect or anything, or that he'll accept it easily. It's a process and to be honest, I don't think some people ever get past the small stuff. But I trust Usopp. He'll get there. I know he will."

There was silence until Zoro turned to Sanji and noticed him staring. "What?"

"Nothing."

"Liar, that's so not nothing." Zoro shook his head. "You don't just stare at someone like that for no reason."

"Well maybe I do! Ever thought of that?"

Zoro laughed. "Do you have any idea how ridiculous you sound?"

"Yeah well …"

"Come on," Zoro said in a softer voice, all teasing gone from his tone. "You can talk to me. If you can't tell your boyfriend, who _can_ you tell?"

"It's nothing, just …" Sanji trailed off. "You're kind of like Luffy, you know. You act like you don't get it and there's this honest confusion in your eyes if I were to ask you something on, say quantum physics, but you have these moments where … I don't know, there's just these times where you just seem to _get it_ , you know? I can't really explaining it, but it's like you completely understand the world around you and everything it's made up of and in that moment, you just say the right thing." Sanji shook his head. "I don't know, do you get it?"

"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about," Zoro declared. "But the light's green and you need to turn left."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You're full of shit, the light's still r—"

"HEY DIPSHIT, MOVE THE FUCKING CAR!"

"Told ya."

Sanji pushed the car forward and turned right. "You're still wrong though, Marimo. If you went left, you'd end up circling the mall again."

"What happened to me just getting it?"

"You lost it," Sanji replied simply. "It comes and goes. Some days you're a marimo and some days you're a marimo with a brain." He shrugged. "Or rather, you're always a marimo, who gains a brain for a few select minutes before you tumble back into having a brain made of algae."

"Why the fuck are we here?"

Zoro unbuckled his seatbelt and opened his side of the car door. "We need to face the music, cook," he said. "You can't avoid it forever." He went around the car and opened the door on Sanji's side, waiting for the blond to come up but the blond stayed put in the car, sinking low in his seat.

"I'm not going in."

"You said you'd let me drive today."

"Yeah and I thought we were going to Luffy's."

"We will. After this," Zoro said.

Sanji turned his head away from him.

Zoro sighed and bent down. "Look at me Sanji. Please."

Sanji did not look at him.

"Fuck, Sanji, I'm not trying to hurt you. I'm not doing this because I want to, I'm doing this because we have to. This isn't pleasant for me either. Trust me, I'd rather be anywhere but here. Do you remember twenty-nine?"

Silence.

"Number twenty-nine: your strength. You're strong Sanji. You've been through hell no one should ever have to bear through. You've seen things no one should ever have to, dealt with situations you should've never been placed in the first place. You've dealt with bullies and you've dealt with the cooks. You've dealt with loneliness and fear, you've conquered it. Don't ever be ashamed of your scars, they're signs that you're stronger than what tried to kill you. Do you remember what I said? When people get scared, instead of facing their fears, they try to destroy them, try to make them disappear through means that should never be used. Sanji, you have to face them. You may have dealt with the cooks, but this is your last battle. This is your last fight and it's the most important one. Because if you just push it away, it'll find a way to creep back up and try to strike you again. This is the fight where you defeat them. They won't ever reach you again, you'll never have to fear them, never again. I know you're scared Sanji." Zoro took Sanji's hand that was tightly gripping the edge of the chair and put it to his chest. "Can you feel that? I'm scared too. It burns. But it's a good kind of burn. It's your last match Sanji and this time it's different. I'm here. I'm here and I don't plan on leaving unless you force me." He squeezed the hand he was holding.

Sanji was shaking. Zoro could feel him shaking. "Z-Zoro …" He took in a deep breath and the the smallest trace of a rasp was audible. His grip on Zoro was tightening, Zoro's hand turning pale. He said nothing, watching the way Sanji seemed to quiver as he tried to speak. "Z-Zoro, I … I c-can't breathe …"

"Shh," Zoro told him softly. "Just copy me, okay?" Zoro breathed in slowly through his nose, waiting as Sanji shakily copied him before exhaling slowly. "Is your chest tight? Remember, don't speak, just nod or shake your head."

Sanji nodded slowly.

"Do you want to leave?"

Sanji shook his head.

"Okay."

Zoro stayed silent, waiting as Sanji tried to control his own breathing. He tried not to show how much he was freaking out. Instead, he sucked in a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. He listened to the sound of Sanji's breathing, watched the way Sanji's fingers seemed to follow the path along his blazer into his pocket, trying to take out a pack, but coming out dry.

Zoro didn't know how long they stayed like that, silent and still before he dared to speak again.

"Better?"

Sanji nodded.

Zoro nodded. "Okay. I didn't want to force you, I'll drive us back, okay?"

Sanji's hand reached out and grabbed Zoro's arm, stopping him from leaving. "No," he gasped. "G-give me a m-minute."

Zoro stayed put.

Sanji took a deep breath, his whole body shaking before he spoke. "I'm better." He took a moment of pause before he continued. "I want …" He sucked in a deep breath, a hissing sound coming out. "I want to k-kick their fucking a-asses."

Zoro smiled and kissed him softly. Their lips brushed each others gently for a moment. Just as Zoro was pulling back, Sanji wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling him closer. He kissed him forcefully with vigour and anxiety, with strength. It tasted like his resolve.

They parted and Zoro let out a gasp, smiling brightly. "Come on. We've got some asses to kick."

Sanji got out of the car, his feet shaking on the pavement. It was clear he was beyond nervous and he clung to Zoro tightly, like he expected him to disappear. He didn't grip his hand, though it wasn't as though Zoro had been expecting him to. Through everything that had happened, he had seen Sanji's pride fluctuate, his dignity waver, but never had it ever disappeared. He'd be damned if it went away now.

Zoro opened the doors to the Baratie the same way he had done so many months ago, countless nights, but this time it was different. This time he wasn't here to see Sanji, he was here to fight alongside Sanji.

It wasn't like in the movies where everyone seemed to pause and stop, realizing that important people had just entered. Rather, the restaurant continued on as normal. The receptionist behind the desk greeted them with a smile.

Zoro glared at him.

"Do you have a reservation?" asked the man.

"No," Zoro replied in a clipped tone. He felt Sanji grip his arm tightly, as though to tell him to be quiet.

"Good evening, Tom."

The way Sanji spoke, it was strained and forced. He plastered on a fake smile, one that Zoro hadn't seen in a long time. He was still good at it, he still knew how to charm others.

The stuck-up man behind the counter wearing a sweater vest looked up to see them for the first time and his eyes bulged out of their sockets. If he hadn't been wearing those ridiculous looking glasses, Zoro thought they'd have fallen out of his head.

"S-Sanji?" the man asked. "W-what are you doing here? We thought …" The man gnawed at his bottom lip. "We thought you were—"

"Dead?" Sanji cut him off. "Died in a ditch maybe? Hoping I had ended up on the bad side of town and the yakuza dealt with me?" The way Sanji spoke now, it was so different from the way Zoro remembered him talking to Patty. There was something in his voice that hadn't been there before. Confidence. It was kinda sexy, when Zoro thought about it, the commanding tone Sanji's voice was taking.

"I—"

"Oh, it's okay Tom," Sanji said, "you don't need to hide it. You never liked me, did you? None of you ever did." He shook his head. "No, you weren't very fond of me. Look, I didn't come here because I wanted to catch up on old times, I cam here to talk to Patty and Carne. Where are they?"

"T-that man," Tom stuttered, "standing n-next to you. Is he …?"

"I can speak for myself, thanks," Zoro snapped. "Zoro Roronoa, nice to meet you, _Tom_ ," he snapped, venom laced in his voice. "Remember me now?"

"The kendo champion …" Tom seemed to be in a state of shock, but considering he had been what Zoro assumed was a bystander to all of Sanji's abuse, he wasn't feeling particularly bad for him. "B-but …"

"Where's Patty and Carne?" Zoro demanded.

"I-in the kitchen," Tom said, still clearly shaken. "B-but there's something you should know—"

"Thanks Tom," Sanji said, cutting him off. The tone he used, though confident, at the same time held a different kind of malice from the kind Zoro was used to. It was almost hidden, under layers and layers of other emotions, but it was still there, present and obvious. Throughout the entire thing, if one were to see this conversation from afar, Sanji would appear to be the perfect gentlemen whereas Zoro seemed to be lashing out for no reason. Was this another difference between them? How was Sanji so refined, even when insulting someone?

With that, he tugged on Zoro's arm and they headed straight for the kitchens.

They stood outside the doors and though Zoro expected Sanji to pause or take a moment to breathe before he opened the doors, he didn't. He didn't even waver or blink as he pushed the doors open and walked straight in as though he owned the place.

"Patty! Carne!"

The two cooks turned at the sound of their names and almost immediately, their eyes widened. It was the kind of look one got in their eyes when they were terrified.

"Hello Sanji," said Patty, managing to speak through clenched teeth. "Long time no see, how have you been?"

"Yes, how have you been dear Sanji?" asked Carne, smiling a little too widely.

 _What the fuck?_

"W-what?" Sanji asked and it seemed as though he was shaken off guard. He was clearly as confused, if not more, than Zoro was and it was making him even more nervous.

"Old buddy Sanji's back!" one of the cooks said with a big grin. They patted him on the back harshly and Sanji flinched, his grip on Zoro tightening.

"Oh, you found happiness with that swordsman? Wonderful!" said Patty. "Knew you deserved someone special."

What the fuck was going on? There didn't seem to be any logic to anything that was going on. What was happening?

Zoro squeezed Sanji's hand tightly.

 _BAM!_

The doors to the kitchen were slammed open and in walked a man with a large chef hat, blond hair and a very strange moustache, though the strangest thing about him had to be his peg leg.

The moment he laid eyes on Sanji, he walked up to him and gave him a kick in the head.

Sanji didn't even blink.

Zoro expected Sanji to freak out, or flinch or do something that wasn't what he did. Instead of doing anything Zoro predicted, Sanji's lips curled into a smirk. "Old geezer!" he yelled.

"Fucking Eggplant!" the man yelled back. "Where the fuck have you been for the past six months?!" He made a move to strike at Sanji again but Zoro stepped in front of him and held up his arms in a defensive manoeuvre.

"Hey!" Zoro snapped, glaring at the man. "Don't you fucking dare touch him!"

The man raised an eyebrow. "Who's he, Eggplant?"

 _Eggplant? What the fuck is this man talking about? Sanji's not an eggplant— holy shit, is this man …?_

"Zeff?"

The word was choked out, half in shock, half in pure stupidity.

"I want you to tell me something, Marimo," the man said, lowering himself down to Zoro's level, "how is it that you know my name, while I have no idea who the fuck you are? And how do you know Eggplant over there?"

"He's Zoro Roronoa, sir!" one of the cooks said. "He's a world famous kendo champion."

"Is that so?" asked Zeff, looking at Zoro with scrutinizing eyes. "You're a kendo champ?"

"He was all over the news a while ago," the cook who had spoken before supplied.

"Don't watch the news, its full of lies," Zeff declared. "And how about you? Are you a liar?"

"N-no," Zoro said. He wondered to himself why he was quivering so much. "Sir. No sir!"

Zeff nodded slowly before standing upright again. "Patty! Carne!"

"Yes sir!" the two cried in unison.

"Get everyone out, I want to have a personal talk with Eggplant and Roronoa over here."

"Yes sir!"

The two bastard cooks practically clicked their heels in compliance before rushing everyone out of the kitchen, escorting them to God knew where. Zeff looked to Sanji this time. "Where have you been?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "Well, you see there was this thing and uh, you see, I kinda got kidnapped by this guy and uh— no, it's okay! He's a good guy! We're fine now! Stop glaring at him, you old fart! But uh … He told me he wouldn't let me go until my mentality returned to a regular person's state and uh so … he kinda kept me hostage?"

"Is that a question or a statement?" asked Zeff.

"Don't make me out to be the bad guy!" Zoro snapped, glaring at Sanji.

"I don't know," Sanji said. "Zoro's not bad, I swear."

Zeff nodded slowly. "It seems like your mentality is at a normal state. Why are you still with him?"

Sanji blushed and turned his head away. "I … I decided to stay. With him, I mean."

"Oh yeah? Was this rust bucket not enough for you?" Zeff asked, raising an eyebrow. "Eh, Eggplant?!"

"Shut up you old geezer! I'm trying to talk here!"

"Well you're doing a shit jab at it! Is this the way I raised you? Respect your elders, you fucking moron!"

"Fucking bastard!"

Zoro watched the exchange, wondering what exactly was going on. It didn't seem like the usual exchange between father and son. The way Sanji had spoken of Zeff, he had made him sound like a father figure, with such respect and admiration. This was not what he had been expecting.

He eyed the exit. Perhaps he could escape? He really did want to beat those bastard cooks into the ground.

He started towards the door, slowly tiptoeing when—

"Don't you dare fucking move, Roronoa."

Zoro froze in his place.

"Sanji, go to the dining hall. I want to have a little talk here with Mr. Roronoa." The cracking of his knuckles and menacing glare were implied.

"Don't tell me what to do, old man!" Sanji snapped, but he left anyway.

 _Wait! Don't leave me here with this nutjob!_ But of course, Zoro's voice didn't work and instead the kitchen doors closed and there was only him and Zeff in the room.

"Zoro Roronoa," said Zeff slowly, "Eggplant seems rather fond of you. What happened in the months he's been gone?"

"Shouldn't you ask him that?" Zoro asked, wondering what to do. He felt as though he were on a minefield, unable to tell where the bombs were. One wrong move and he'd be dead.

"I did, didn't you see?" Zeff asked. "The bastard doesn't tell me anything."

"It's what he said it was. I took him in."

"You abducted him."

"I didn't abduct him—"

"He called it kidnap."

"He's overdramatic—"

"He called himself a hostage."

"Sanji calls himself a lot of things." Zoro shook his head. "Look, I just took him in."

Zeff nodded slowly. Zoro was about to up and leave when Zeff spoke again. "Hurt him and I kill you."

"Excuse me?" Zoro asked.

"You heard me. He's very important to me and he seems to trust you fully. If you ever do anything to break that trust, I'll snap your neck and boil you in a pot."

Zoro let out a sigh of disbelief. "You care about him? He means a lot to you? Do you even know why I had to get him out of here? Do you even know why I took him from here? I needed to get him away from this place. He would've died here!"

Zeff gave him a strange look.

"Don't tell me you seriously don't know." By the blank look on Zeff's face, it seemed as though the head chef really didn't understand. "You don't know what he's been through? How can you fucking call yourself his father if you don't even know what's happening to your son?!" he demanded. "Sanji … Sanji admires you, he respects you, do you even realize that? And you, the bastard, you don't even know when he's in pain?" Zoro shook his head. "How often are you actually around? Do you have any idea how those cooks treat him? Like he's garbage, like he's worthless. They push him around and kick him when he's done, they call him names, they made him fucking hate himself! They … They're fucking monsters! They abuse him, they hit him, they beat him, they fucking _raped_ him, you fucking retard! Don't you dare tell me you care about Sanji if you can't even bother to know the shit he's been through!"

Zeff looked visibly shaken. "R-rape?"

"Yes you fucker, they raped him!" Zoro screamed. "They took him by force, they violated him, they fucking broke him! Do you get it now? You think you care about him? How the fuck can you say that, with the hell that's been going on right under your nose that you never bothered to fucking notice?!"

"I … I didn't know …"

"Of course you didn't fucking know! He didn't want you to know! The pain you have, you hide it from the ones you love because you don't want to hurt them. He hid it from you. Do you know anything about him at all?" Zoro demanded.

"I see."

There was silence and Zoro took deep breaths, trying to reign back in his rage. He wouldn't snap at this man again, he felt as though he had already crossed the line talking to him the way he had. Finally, the blond chef spoke again.

"Is he happy?"

Zoro stared at him.

"I said, _is he happy_ , Marimo?"

"Don't call me that," Zoro said stupidly. "Only Sanji calls me that."

Zeff sighed. "I told him I'd make him a home … I'd make him a place where he was safe, where he didn't have to hide, where he could just live, doing what he loved." He shook his head. "I lied to him, didn't I?"

The look in the old man's eyes shook Zoro to his core. "You didn't know, it's not … it's not your fault …"

"Sanji put his trust in me," Zeff said, "and I couldn't help him. I made it worse, didn't I? I failed him when he needed support, I didn't know." He looked up at Zoro, meeting his gaze head on. "Is he happy with you?"

Zoro's lips parted to speak but no words came out.

Sanji had never said it, never told him aloud that he enjoyed time with him exactly. He never turned to him and said, "I'm having fun" or anything like that. But Sanji had chosen to stay with him still, that meant something. Sanji had told him he loved him.

"I believe so, sir," Zoro said.

"You make him happy?"

Happy. It was such a simple word but it held so much meaning. Happy. Zoro knew Sanji made him happy. He knew that he was happy every time he heard Sanji's slightly too refine speech escape, he was happy whenever his name was said in that baritone voice, he was happy every time he smelt Sanji's latest meal cooking, he was happy every time he kissed the man, every time Sanji initiated a kiss, every time they had ever done it, he hadn't been happy, he had been euphoric.

"I can only hope I do," Zoro said honestly. "Sir."

"He deserves to be happy, doesn't he?" asked Zeff in a quiet voice.

"Yes," Zoro replied. "More than anyone, sir."

Zeff looked at Zoro. "If you make him cry, I'm going to kill you."

Zoro let a ghost of a smile cross his lips. "Of course, you can kill me the sixth time around."

"Sixth time?" Zeff asked raising an eyebrow.

"Well, first Sanji will have killed me to make himself feel better, then I most likely would've killed myself for making me cry and of course, my friends would each have a go at me. So yes, you'd be sixth to kill me."

Zeff nodded. He reached out and ruffled Zoro's hair with his large hand. "I like you, Strawberry."

Zoro paused and gave him a strange look before nodding.

"I'm trusting you with him," Zeff said. "Remember, if you make him cry, I get to kill you sixth."

Zoro shook his head. "I don't think it'll ever come to that."

"Oh really? Why is that?"

"Because I'll die before I let myself be the reason for his tears."

Zeff looked at him. "Something tells me he'll be the one crying the most at your funeral."

Zoro bit his bottom lip. "Um, there's something I should tell you, about our relationship, that is—"

"I know," Zeff cut him off.

"You do?"

"Strawberry, have you seen the way he looks at you? Anyone could tell. Just because I'm old, I'm not blind."

Zoro nodded. "Are you … okay with it?"

"Would it matter if I wasn't?"

"What do you mean?"

"If I told you I didn't approve of the fact that you were in a homosexual relationship with Sanji, would it matter?"

Zoro didn't even blink before the answer was coming out of his mouth. "No." He shook his head. "It wouldn't."

"And that's why it doesn't matter to me," Zeff said. "Sanji needs someone who's going to fight for him through all his insecurities, who's going to stand strong and be his pillar when he needs it. He needs someone who's his equal, who he can have a fair fight with."

"Quite frankly, sir, Sanji kicked my ass this January," Zoro admitted with a big grin.

"That's my boy," Zeff said, his eyes shining with pride. "Now go on, Strawberry, I'm sure Eggplant's getting antsy outside in the dining hall."

"One more thing, before I go," Zoro said slowly.

"What is it?" asked Zeff, his voice gruff.

"Does my head really look like a strawberry?"

Zeff gave him a pointed look.

"Right, sorry."

When Zoro entered the dining hall, he saw Sanji speaking to Patty and Carne. From the way they were talking to him, they seemed to have dropped the nice guy act and were harassing Sanji. He was about to interfere, to march over, push them aside and yell at them for being such assholes, when he got close enough to hear what they were all saying.

"— noa's slut, eh? Do you like it? Taking it up the ass from him?"

Zoro saw red, ready to let his mouth fly off and his fist to connect directly with Carne's face when Sanji spoke.

"Your insults are rather mundane. Do you realize that's the fourth time in the past two minutes that you've made a comment about my ass?" Sanji asked, raising an inquisitive eyebrow. "I think you may have a little obsession, a bit unhealthy, don't you think?"

Zoro wanted to laugh at the look on Carne's face when Sanji said that. He'd pay a over a million yen to see that expression again.

"D-don't rope me in with your lot!"

"My lot?" Sanji repeated. "If I remember this correctly, I believe you've already had your fair share of me. And you liked it," he added. "Now, I'm not saying I liked it, but it seemed as though you were enjoying yourself quite nicely. You too Patty, weren't you the first to take a dive in?" he asked.

Patty's face was beet red.

"Now listen to me boys. When I tell you that I'm not coming back here, I think even your microscopic sized brains can comprehend that I mean it. Take a good look, because I'm never entering the Baratie again. Understood?"

"Little twerp!" screamed Patty. "You think you can talk all-mighty to us just because Zeff is here to bail your ass out?"

"It's not because of Zeff," Sanji told him. "I can assure you of that."

"Bastard's suddenly got a backbone now? What are you going to do, Blondie?" Carne sneered. "Tell on us?"

"No," Sanji said firmly. "I won't. And if you think I'm not telling because for you, I'm not. I'm doing it for Zeff. Because if someday the Baratie does go up in smoke, it will never be by my hands."

 _THUD!_

Zoro watched, open mouthed as, with one swift kick, Sanji had the cooks on the floor, sporting large and painful bruises on their cheeks. Zoro could feel the pain from when Sanji used to kick him around, it hurt like hell. He didn't feel an ounce of sympathy towards the poor bastards.

Zoro grinned and approached Sanji, who was towering over the two cooks, breathing harshly.

"You okay?" he asked him.

Sanji took a deep breath and turned to him. "Yeah. I'm okay."

And he felt as though Sanji meant it and he knew it and he believed it himself. He was okay and he was going to be okay.

"So are we leaving?" Zoro asked.

"Yeah, sure. But one last thing." Sanji crouched down so he was level with cooks. "Just a parting message my boyfriend taught me. _Mange ta merde._ "

"Fuck that's hot," Zoro couldn't help gasping. The way Sanji spoke French … It was almost as though he was meant to speak French with that mouth of his. They said French was the language of love. Zoro realized in that moment that, forget dirty talk, if Sanji just spoke French to him exactly the way he just had to those cooks, he might just cum on his voice alone.

With that, Sanji and Zoro exited the Baratie for the last time.

The second they were in the car, Zoro kissed Sanji. It was almost like Valentine's Day all over again, a hot make-out session in the car, except this time, Zoro practically crawled into Sanji's lap, caressing his face, holding him tightly, making sure he couldn't get away.

"Do you have any idea how sexy your voice is?" he whispered in a husky voice, blowing softly in Sanji's ear. The cook shivered. "I need to teach you more French," Zoro decided. _"Tu es beau. Tu es tellement beau."_

Sanji's brow furrowed in confusion but Zoro ignored his questioning gaze and instead kissed him again, harsher. His lips moved from his lips to his neck, leaving trails of soft kisses before biting down on his collarbone. Sanji jerked, his hips thrusting upwards.

"Fuck," he hissed through clenched teeth.

 _"Tu es le mienne. Et je suis le tienne. Toujours. Je t'aime, Sanji. Je t'aime tellement."_ As Sanji seemed to come undone under Zoro's wandering fingers as he whispered into his neck, he gasped out a mixture of Zoro's name and profanities. _"Seulement le mienne, tu es seulement pour moi, aucun d'autre peux t'avoir. C'est la même avec moi, je suis seulement à toi, pour toi seulement. Je t'aime."_

"Fuck, Zoro!" Sanji's hips thrust upwards again, trying to rub against Zoro as his lips came back to Sanji's mouth. "I … I need you."

"When we get back," Zoro told him, kissing him softly and slowly. When he parted from him, he went back to his seat and then proceeded to break the speed limit in order to get to the shit apartment as quickly as possible.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : Okay, now for the thank-yous!_

 _Michikuni Mayu : I have a huge interest in yakuza stories, ever since I learnt what it was. I don't really know much about the mafia or anything like that, but I'm willing to do research. I actually tried writing a bit of **The Yakuza's Son** beginning which is about 2000 words long right now, but anyway, yeah, I really like the ideas which is why I had them. Yup, I did love that scene in the anime and the manga and decided it was totally like Zoro so yeah, I put it in there. I hope you liked this chapter, I know I totally screwed Zeff up! Sorry!_

 _Cara-Dolce: I'm happy you reviewed, especially since the review you sent me kind of made me feel like you wouldn't review again, but you have, multiple times and it makes me really happy! I really wanted to show how some people look at gay relationships, in a non-offensive way and I didn't set out to make Usopp a bad guy, I really didn't, but it's like Zoro said, "when someone says I'm gay and you reply, I'm fine with it, after a certain amount of time, you realize what being gay actually means and maybe you're not as okay with it as you thought". Thinking you're good and actually being good are two different things and I wanted to show that, I don't think it's something personal towards them, it's more like, since Usopp's coward, this change is really new for him and he's trying to cope with it, in means that may not be the best, but he's trying. He'll come around._

 _fangal4life : I always did love randomly placed confessions._

 _KleinXDgirl : I'm serious, I might write a oneshot with that happening._

 _JustCallMeLucie : Well I hope you'll like the ending when it comes! I'm working really hard on it!_

 _Raigon : Well now you know. Dear God, I think I screwed it up, but its there!_

 _Random Person (x2): Yeah, I'm working on a teaching French portion, it will come, I promise you. It'll have to come (for reasons you shall not know! Hahahaha, wait in suspense!) and I hope you'll like my other ZoSan stories as much and I won't just be a one-hit wonder. And I'm thinking about it, I need people to respond to my poll._

 _Shizuka Taiyou : I just know one thing about **Killa Kill,** (well, two things). One, my friend told me the ending sucks and I should never watch it and two: after watching **Hunter x Hunter** (some of it, not all of it, cause like **One Piece,** it's a HUGE endeavour, but luckily, it's on Netflix. All the big shows are on Netflix, but **One Piece** , I'm sad it got left out!) the name of that show reminds me of Killua (LOVE KILLUA!)._

 _lilcutieprincess : Would you believe me if I told you I haven't tried writing a straight couple in a while? It's been a while since I've read about a straight couple on top of it all. **Money Can't Buy i** s one of the less developed ideas, but I've got some, I'll probably shove some ZoSan in there too in the corners, if I end up writing it. I think I'll write them all, but I don't know which one I'll do first._

 _Nachtwolke : Inspired by strange things, I am (and now I feel like I'm talking like Kenshin. Bonus points if you know who I'm talking about without looking it up). And I don't know why, but I've got a thing for waiters and therapists. I've got a **Naruto** story in mind with Naruto as a waiter and there are two stories that have Zoro has a therapist, interesting, isn't it? And I hate the colour pink, and I've walked into the wrong locker room so many times! Plus, for some reason, I have 4 math textbooks. WHO THE HELL NEEDS 4 MATH TEXTBOOKS?!_

 _Tulula-Mate: Yup, beautiful people indeed._

 _crystalbluefox : If you've updated yet, I haven't seen it, but dear God I can't wait! I need to do a lot of research for **Like Heroin** and **The Yakuza's Son** because I know nothing about the yakuza or drugs (I'm free of contaminants, as I like to put it) but I will look forward to writing about Sanji smoking again because it's just a tad weird for me when he's not doing it and then I go and watch an episode and am like, "hey! You're smoking!" And actually, there are two more stories that should be added to that list of potential stories that I came up with. I'm really glad you reviewed, since you hadn't for a while and I was like, "did I freak them out by saying I worship them? SENPAI, I'M SORRY!" but yeah, thanks for reviewing! I will be updating weekly, on either Sundays or Saturdays. Today it seems it'll be on Saturday._

 _This is the first chapter to get so many reviews in such a short time. I know it's going to be a pain, but I ask you go to my profile page and resubmit the stories you want, because that way, I can keep better tabs on it and come to a decision on which one I'll write next first. I want to write them all to be honest. Now for the questions!_

 ** _First: what did Zoro say? I did not plan on hm speaking French, but he ended up speaking French anyway!_**

 ** _And second: I asked it before a long time ago, but if you haven't noticed, each chapter is told by a different person. Sanji gets even numbered chapters, Zoro gets odd. Which chapters do you prefer?_**


	38. I Wouldn't Mind

_**Author's Note:** Okay so after this chapter, I'll be revising past ones because yeah, I screw up "who's" and "whose" and I probably screwed up some "who" and "whom"s, not that I even fully understand that yet, but yeah, I'll be doing revision. Also, chapter 39 will be a long one, so it might take me longer to post it. All chapters that come next will be named after songs which I highly reccomend listenign to. This chapter was not going to have this name, but ti ended up having it anyway ... Um, Kuina's thing ... It wasn't originally that way. I had so many ideas on how she could've died and then this one hit me and I went with it. I had a more complicated one with Mihawk, but then I even didn't understand it. I don't own One Piece. Question, is it not weird how perfect all of their teeth are? Because Luffy showers once a week and he lives on the sea and yeah, they're well-nourished (thank you Sanji!) but still ... It's kinda weird. I don't own **One Piece.**_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Mentions of past rape and abuse**

 **Mentions of suicide**

 **Teasing. (there is no sex in this chapter)**

* * *

Chapter 38: I Wouldn't Mind

 _I'm not afraid, anymore  
_ _I'm not afraid  
_ _Forever is a long time  
_ _But I wouldn't mind spending it by your side  
_ _Tell me everyday I get to wake up to that smile  
_ _I wouldn't mind it at all_

—He Is We, _I Wouldn't Mind_

* * *

"I did it."

Sanji's brow furrowed. "What?"

"I finally did it," Usopp repeated.

Sanji pulled the phone away from his ear. "Usopp's on the phone," he explained to Zoro. "He said he finally did it. Do you know what he's talking about?"

Zoro swallowed down the rest of his food before nodding his head. "Yeah. Tell him congrats on finally getting laid. Only took him twenty-two years."

Sanji frowned, not quite sure if that was what Usopp had meant, but he pressed the phone back to his ear. "Um, Zoro says congrats on finally getting la—"

"That's not what it is!" Usopp cut him off.

 _Yeah, I had a feeling it wasn't that._

"Put him on the phone," Usopp demanded.

Sanji handed the phone over to Zoro. "He wants to talk to you."

Zoro took the phone and gulped down his drink before saying, "Hello?"

Sanji could hear Usopp's protests through the phone as Zoro pulled it away from his ear and waited until the screams seemed to have calmed down. When he finally brought the phone back to his ear, Zoro laughed. "Yeah, I know that wasn't what it was. So you finally got some balls, eh?"

Zoro laughed again. "Of course that's what she said, baka."

It was starting to annoy Sanji that he couldn't hear the other end of the conversation when Zoro's brow furrowed and he frowned. What was Usopp saying? "This has nothing to do with her." There was a pause and then, "Yeah, I tried, once, and remember? I never got around to it." Zoro let out a frustrated sigh. "Look, I never got around to asking so you're already a step ahead of me! I thought we agreed we'd never speak of this again!" Pause, then— "Usopp, I don't fucking care if you think it's relevant, don't fucking talk to me about her!" Zoro sighed and took a deep breath. "Look, I'm sorry, I overreacted. It's just still hard for me, okay? Besides, it's in the past now. Kuina … she isn't here now, okay?" Zoro shook his head and sighed. "Look, we'll talk about this later." He handed the phone back over to Sanji and wouldn't meet his eye for the rest of breakfast.

* * *

"Who's Kuina?"

"Why does it matter?" Zoro asked, rolling his eyes.

"Because clearly Usopp was talking about a marriage proposal and Kuina's name came up," Sanji replied. "Dammit Zoro, stop watching TV and pay attention!" He grabbed the remote from beside the swordsman and muted the TV (without much regret, it was Zoro's crappy soap opera again). "I'll ask you again. Who's Kuina?"

"A girl," came Zoro's response. "Can I get back to my show now?"

"Zoro."

Zoro sighed and sat up properly. "Look, do we need to discuss this now? What does it matter who Kuina is?"

"Okay, fine, you won't tell me, but I can guess," Sanji told him. "I know you. I also know Usopp was talking about you when you were on the phone, about whether or not you had asked someone. You were going to propose to her, weren't you?"

Zoro stayed silent.

"And she died, you said, right? You never got around to it. How am I doing so far?"

Zoro gritted his teeth. "Look, it wasn't like that—"

"Oh yeah? Then how _was_ it, Zoro?" Sanji demanded. "Because I know that you may not want to talk about it, but you can't have a relationship without communication—"

"Well does it have to be about my dead girlfriend?!"

Sanji bit his lip. He could see the pain in Zoro's eyes, the way they seemed to shine with insecurity, with terror. Zoro was confident, as long as Sanji had known him, Zoro had been the arrogant one, the one with all the pride, why did he look so vulnerable at the mention of this woman?

"I'm sorry," Sanji managed to say quietly. "I just … Never mind."

Zoro's eyes seemed to widen in surprise and almost instantly, he put a hand on Sanji's arm, squeezing gently. "No, what is it?"

"It's just …" Sanji turned his head away from Zoro. "You know … _everything_ , about my past. My childhood, my strange teenage years and you can pretty much imagine the beginning of my young adult stage. You know about my parents death, about Zeff, you even met him. You know about the abuse and the … the cutting and you even know about the r-r-ra—"

"Sanji, don't force yourself—"

"You know," Sanji cut him off. "And I know almost nothing about your past." He bit his bottom lip. "How am I supposed to be in a relationship with someone if I barely know anything about them?"

"Do you remember when you first came here?" Zoro asked softly.

"When you forced me here against my will and you shoved toxic waste down my throat?"

Zoro chuckled. "Yeah, then."

"Yes."

"Do you know what I told you, when you said you didn't know who I was?"

Sanji paused for a moment. "You said … You said you were twenty-two and going to be twenty-three in about three months, you have XF blood, you're left-handed, your star sign is Scorpio, you never had sushi before the Baratie, you practice Santoryu, you had been sober for two months, your natural hair colour is green and you had a tiny scar on your cheek thanks to me. And by the time that conversation ended, I also knew you spoke French."

"Okay, that's how many facts? About ten facts? Maybe a dozen? Do you want to know how long it takes a normal person to get all of that out of me?"

Sanji shook his head.

"I've known Johnny and Yosaku since I was seventeen. They still don't know my blood type," Zoro said. "And in the past seven months, you've gotten to know me better than even Luffy and Ace. I've known the D Brothers for a long time."

"D Brothers?"

"Monkey D. Luffy and Portgas D. Ace," Zoro explained. "The D Brothers." He shrugged. "Thing I came up with when I was in elementary."

Sanji nodded. "I guess it's kind of stupid to ask for you to tell me more …"

It was clear the blond still wanted to know.

Taking a deep breath, Zoro sighed. "But you're also right. I should talk to you about it."

Sanji waited, his breath caught in his throat. What would Zoro tell him? What would he share? It made him paranoid, made him wonder if he really did want to know what exactly Zoro had had planned with his ex-lover. _But not knowing is going to drive you even more insane,_ his mind reasoned. Yes, it'd be better to just know and get it over with rather than let it fester in his mind until he turned into something else entirely.

"Kuina … Do you remember when I mentioned I wanted to take up swordsmanship?"

Sanji nodded slowly.

"When I was maybe eight or so, I told my parents that I wanted to try my hand at swordsmanship. Don't even begin to ask me why. I don't know what motivated me, but I think it might've been because I was bullied for my hair and I thought martial arts wouldn't be enough. They conceded and sent me to a dojo. Koshiro. He was the master of the dojo."

"Dojos? Those things still exist?"

"Yeah, it was an old dojo. Koshiro, he had a daughter. She was a year older than me." Zoro took a deep breath. "Her name was Kuina."

Sanji nodded slowly. He knew it would hurt to hear about this past, to know about how Zoro had loved someone else, but he wasn't stupid. Of course Zoro had past relationships, of course they went well. It was stupid of him to think that his life started with Sanji, though that was the way Sanji saw his life's beginning. With Zoro. With a loud Marimo asking for water.

* * *

 _She was good. Because she was the daughter of a dojo master, she practiced swordsmanship long before I did. I remember when I first met her, I was pissed cause she was taller than me. She had dark hair and dark eyes, but her skin was pale. It's kind of funny, the first real relationship I got into was with a woman with dark features and now for my second major relationship, I'm with a polar opposite. She'd have liked you, Sanji._

 _Anyway, the first day I was there, she called me a shrimp and challenged me to a fight. She gave me a shinai and beat me in less than a minute._

 _When I came back after that first lesson, I was covered in bruises, mainly her fault. Well, actually, she said it was my fault because I couldn't guard myself. My parents wanted to pull me out immediately but I had a goal. I wanted to beat her. To be beaten by a girl was the most embarrassing thing that could ever happen to me. She already had age and height over me, I wouldn't let her be stronger too._

 _I fought with her a lot, over a thousand times. And I kept losing. I was getting better, make no mistake of it, but every time I improved, so did she and the gap between our abilities just kept growing. I felt like I could never breach it._

 _When I was thirteen, she caught me under the mistletoe. Actually, to be more precise, my parents made her catch me under the mistletoe. I don't know, they thought we were some golden couple. I gagged afterwards and screamed at how that was a horrible first kiss._

 _We went to the same high school and I applied for the kendo team. Kuina wanted to join too, but they wouldn't let her. Because she was a girl._

 _She said she wanted to be the best, regardless of her sex. She didn't want it limiting her, she wished she had been born a man. I hate sexist people, especially after I saw what it did to her._

 _When I was nineteen and I was still a virgin, I decided that I had to get rid of it somehow because I wouldn't let myself turn twenty without it happening. I was really dedicated at that point, to working hard and practicing I didn't have much time for a love live, or at least, I made no effort to have one._

 _Kuina told me that she was the same way, dedicated, not wanting to have a distraction from her goal. We both decided we were little shits though if she reached twenty-one without losing her cherry and I would be forever labeled the loser of the world if I couldn't get it up at least once for something other than porn._

* * *

Zoro sucked in a deep breath and Sanji knew what was coming almost instantly. Zoro's eyes were closed as he breathed slowly. "I don't … I shouldn't tell you this stuff—"

"Zoro," he cut him off. Yes, dear God, it hurt more than he thought it would but not hearing it was hurting him more. "Tell me."

Zoro glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. "I …" He sighed. "We did it."

Sanji nodded, trying to swallow a lump that was forming in his throat. "How … how was it?"

"What do you mean how was it?" Zoro asked, his cheeks turning red. "It was fucking horrible, it always is the first time. What, you think we're all born porn stars?" He shook his head. "It was clumsy and disorganized and I didn't even last two minutes. She ended up bleeding and then I started freaking out and it was over in a flash. Afterwards I remembered there were such things as STDs and totally lost my shit, until we made sure to get tested." He chuckled softly. "To be honest I've never told anyone that story. It's too embarrassing."

Sanji bit his bottom lip. "So … what happened after?"

"I …" Zoro looked away. "Something just clicked for me. Don't get me wrong, it was horrendous, dear God, I'm surprised it didn't turn me off sex forever, but … I thought if we tried it again, maybe we'd do it right the next time around."

"So did you? Do it right, I mean." Sanji really didn't want to hear his answer, but he waited anyway.

"Yeah, we did." Zoro sucked in a deep breath. "But not until almost a year later."

Sanji gave him a strange look. "What do you mean?"

Zoro looked at the ground, chuckling lightly as his foot tapped on the floor insistently to a non-existent beat. "I may have felt something but Kuina … It was complicated."

* * *

 _Once that fiasco was over, Kuina wanted to go back to the way things were before. And I know it sounds cliché, but I just couldn't. It's not easy. You watch those stupid chick flicks about one night stands and you wonder why the fuck they can't just move on, but it really isn't that easy._

 _It wasn't like I had a sudden revelation or anything, it's not like I realized I loved her or something. It was just … the thought of her doing it with someone who wasn't me, it pissed me off and I couldn't explain why so that pissed me off even more. I wanted things to go back to normal, I knew pining after her would get me nowhere but it just became awkward._

 _It was like going to a family reunion. You know what you have to say, ask how they've been, what's been going on in their life, share a bit about yourself, but at the same time, you can't speak because you just can't get your tongue to work because though they might be family, they're like a total stranger to you at the same time._

 _I don't think it was the fact that I liked her and she didn't like me that killed me. It was that our relationship became awkward and I felt like I couldn't talk to her anymore, I felt like we were strangers and that was something I had never wanted._

 _I got into other relationships, yeah and I don't regret them either. The one I had with Kuina though … It had an unsteady start to say the least._

* * *

"What do you mean?" Sanji asked.

"You know when you're in gym class— well, you didn't stay in school long enough, but in gym, the teacher makes you split up into groups. You have to choose who'll be on your team, if you get to be the captain. The captains will first usually choose either their friends, or the strong players. I know I was always picked pretty early on but then there were the others who just stood there, waiting for their name to be called. When it finally was, even though they were picked, their shoulders were slumped because they knew they hadn't been a first choice, they were being chosen because they were all that was left. Kind of like sloppy leftovers. I remember one thing about high school. Even though I was great at sports, my team always sucked because I always picked those people who were never picked first from before."

Sanji nodded slowly. "So … you felt like you were chosen because she ran out of options?"

Zoro shook his head. "No, she chose me because I was there. Because I was convenient, because she knew me. She came to the university and picked me up, since I had been taking the bus to and from school then. She started making out with me in the back of her car."

* * *

 _It wasn't like I imagined. It wasn't that it wasn't good, it was just that she wasn't putting as much effort into it as I was. I didn't think up some crazy scenario where I became the only one she saw or anything stupid shit like that, but I just kinda hoped she'd come around and want to find me because she realized maybe she could try something there._

 _After the make-out, she said that she needed somewhere to release her sexual frustrations._

 _I don't think she knew that I liked her at that point. She wasn't trying to manipulate me, she just … God, I was such a fucking moron._

 _She loved me though, I know she did. She told me so. But … she didn't tell it to my face._

 _We got into a real relationship, in case you were wondering. Maybe about a month after that incident in the car, she decided she wanted to date me so we started and it was good. But it always felt like she wasn't entirely there. Like she was some place far away where I couldn't reach her._

 _I don't know when it was, maybe six months before the accident when I got it into my head that I wanted to marry her. I loved her and I knew she must've felt the same about me, somehow. She never got mad when I was late because I couldn't find my way, she never yelled at me when I canceled a date because I wanted to train more, in fact, most of our dates were just us at the dojo sparring, occasionally leading to sex. Her father didn't like that very much._

 _I went with Nami to buy a ring, I'm shit at that sort of thing you know. And it was a nice ring, blue actually. A sapphire blue diamond. Cost a shitlod of money too._

 _I just kind of kept it in my pocket, transferring it from each pair of pants I owned. Never left the house without it, always got myself too tongue tied to ask though. But I wonder what would've happened if I had actually done it, asked her, I mean._

 _Because six months after I got the ring, she died._

* * *

Sanji nodded slowly. He felt like his stomach was dropping out from him and the world was coming undone.

"She …" Zoro took a shaky breath. He didn't look at Sanji, but the blond knew there must've been tears building up in his eyes. "She was satisfied, but she wasn't happy. Not all the time at least. The sexist comments got to her, she got pissed a lot of the time because someone told her she couldn't do something because she was a girl. She considered having surgery, you know, just so they'd stop. Hormone therapy and that sort of thing. There was … there was a letter."

Sanji's breath caught in his throat. "No …"

"I … I went over to her apartment one day to pick her up and she was in the bathroom … Just … lying there on the floor …" Zoro choked, his breathing irregular. "T-there was a n-note attached to the m-mirror."

Sanji remembered that first night he had woken up on the couch, the night after Zoro had kissed him. Hadn't he put a post-it note on the bathroom mirror? He felt his blood cool in his veins.

"I am so sorry, I—"

"You didn't know," Zoro cut him off. "You couldn't have known."

"You can stop now," Sanji said softly. "It … it hurts you, don't talk to me about it if it hurts."

"But you …" Zoro took a shaky inhalation. "You talked to me about it and it hurt you too. It … it isn't fair if I don't talk."

Sanji didn't know what to do. He had never seen Zoro break down like this. How did Zoro deal with his break-downs? He didn't have the slightest clue where to begin with him. He knew if he awkwardly patted his back, it would be weird, kissing him silent would be rude, if he pet his hair, well Zoro wasn't an animal. _Fuck, what do I do?_

"It wasn't bloody," Zoro said softly. "It was an overdose. She was taking anti-depressants. I didn't even know. I had no fucking idea …" He shook his head. It was as though Zoro blamed himself for Kuina's death. That wasn't the case, Sanji knew it wasn't, but that didn't make Zoro any less shaky.

"Zoro …"

"The note she wrote … There were tear stains on it. She was in so much pain … and I didn't know. I couldn't help her. She didn't trust me enough to let me share her pain. I would've done it," he said and Sanji had no doubt he would've, had he been able to. "I would've taken it all. But she just … she bottled everything up …" He choked and stared at the ground, refusing to meet Sanji's eyes. "The note … her letter, it was … She wrote it to me."

Sanji's breath caught in his throat.

 _She loved me though, I know she did. She told me so. But … she didn't tell it to my face._

"It said … it said she was sorry. That she didn't want to burden me. Didn't want to make me suffer. That it was better this way." Zoro's fists curled, his nails digging into the palm of his hand, his knuckles turning white. "She wrote … she said she was sorry that she couldn't face me … that I was being tied down to someone like her. She said that I deserved to be happy, that she'd kick my ass if I didn't move on. She … she apologized for not being able to say … to answer me when I told her I loved her … She said …" A tear hit the carpet silently, a wet stain on the floor. "She told me she loved me."

Sanji was truly speechless. This pain … He hadn't even known Zoro had been carrying it with him.

"If she really did love me … why did she leave me?" His voice came out croaked, it cracked and held desperation. "Why … why did she leave me alone?"

Zoro's body tilted to the side, leaning against Sanji. He was heavy, but Sanji wasn't focusing on that. Instead, he was more focused on the way Zoro's body was trembling, just a little, shuddering against Sanji's frame.

"Zoro … I know there's nothing I can say that can change this, and there's nothing I can do to bring her back …" He could see it, in the way Zoro spoke of her, the way his eyes filled with a sense of nostalgia, the way Zoro was crying, Zoro Roronoa was sobbing, he loved her. He had loved her so much. "I can't tell you anything about her, I never knew her. But she sounds amazing Zoro. I … I can't match your pain on that level, I've never lost someone like that before … but …" He took a deep breath. "Remember when you asked me if I wanted you to forget her? I don't. I said it before and I still mean it, don't forget her. I don't want you to remember all the good times and know that she lives on in your heart, that's just bullshit. I want you to remember everything. The good, the bad, the pain, the love … Zoro, those memories … they're a part of you. They make you who you are. Those memories … They're what drives you, aren't they? You fight hard and train, you practice and you train, you do it because of her, don't you?"

"She couldn't …" Zoro choked out softly. "She couldn't accomplish her dream because she was a girl. She … she was strong. And those fucking bastards, they tried to make her weak, tried to make her feel like she was helpless, powerless, they thought they could make her surrender. And she did … They broke her …"

"She died on her own terms," Sanji told him softly. "They didn't break her, she died before she let them. She wasn't going to surrender to anyone but herself. She died strong, Zoro. She died a warrior."

Zoro nodded slowly, his face buried in Sanji's chest. "It hurts, Sanji," he said softly. "Make it stop. Please, make it stop …"

Sanji lowered his gaze and met Zoro's eyes. They were filled with tears, tracks running down the side of his face. Sanji shook his head. "I can't," he said gently. "I can only numb you. You have to make it stop."

"Sanji …"

"I'll help you," Sanji told him. "It'll stop, I promise."

"Aishiteru."

"Aishiteru," Sanji repeated gently.

* * *

Sanji lay on Zoro's bed— _their_ bed, with his hands behind his head. Today Zoro had opened up to him in ways he hadn't even imagined possible. After the discussion about Kuina, they had gone to Partys and calmed down a frantic Usopp, who had been beyond shocked that Kaya had agreed to marry him. Sanji had explained to him how there were some couples were engaged for years before they actually sealed the deal and told him not to rush into things. Now he lay on the bed, his eyes closed as he ordered Zoro where to put his clothes in the cupboard.

"Why don't you just do it?" demanded Zoro.

"Because, your closet is weird and how the fuck am I supposed to know where all those stupid things are?" Sanji shook his head. "Nah, I want my shirts on the right side, we'll divide the closet in half. You really need a bigger room, I'm surprised the bed even fits in here."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Yeah well …"

Sanji sat up and stared across from him. That full-length mirror that had been the bane of his existence when he first started living with Zoro, now he looked himself over, saw himself clearly.

He wasn't as skinny before, still a tad unnaturally thin, but he didn't look boney. His face had some colour to it, his hair wasn't a hopeless mess. In fact, he kind of liked the way his bangs fell into his eye. He looked like he was glowing, his blue eye twinkling as though it knew some untold secret. His arms and legs seemed more fitting for his body now, they didn't seem as pointlessly long as they had before. Maybe he wasn't a train-wreck. Maybe he was —

"Beautiful," Zoro whispered, taking residence on the bed right next to Sanji.

Yeah, maybe he was. Just a little, tiny bit.

"Do you want me to get rid of the mirror?" asked Zoro. "I know you don't like to look at your reflection."

Sanji shook his head. "No, it's okay," he said softly. "Keep it."

"I never … properly thanked you for earlier," Zoro said, his voice taking that slightly awkward tone. "I was a total mess before and—"

"It was nothing," Sanji cut him off. "It's what we do, isn't it? Make the pain stop?"

"Yeah, I guess it is," Zoro said softly. "Thank you. For what you did." Zoro bit his bottom lip and blushed.

Knowing Zoro, this was getting too sappy for him so he was likely to say something stupid—

"How many fucking shoes do you own, Curly Brow?"

Ah, there it was.

"Enough," Sanji replied with a grin. "So, are we going to continue passing pleasantries or are you going to kiss me, Marimo?"

Zoro was about to counter with some smart remark, probably something like about how banter was the nourishing their bullshit relationship, but Sanji cut him off with a kiss, gripping his shirt tightly in his hands.

The fabric easily let Sanji manipulate it as his grip tightened and he pulled, Zoro following Sanji compliantly, his lips soft underneath his own. Zoro rubbed against Sanji's thigh gently, tilting his head to change their angle. Sanji wrapped his leg around Zoro, squeezing tightly, bringing the Marimo closer to him.

Zoro gasped. "You're fucking flexible, you know," he told him, parting from his lips as Sanji let his leg move from around Zoro's waist downwards. Around Zoro's leg his long, pale legs wrapped around him, hooking at his ankle.

Sanji moved himself so that he lay slightly higher than Zoro, though they were both lying vertically and were not on top of each other. "Any complaints?" he hissed in Zoro's ear.

"None," Zoro gasped. Pulling Sanji closer, he kissed him silent, his tongue doing magical things to the blond. Sanji was ready to toss his head back and let his eyes roll to the back of his head from the wonderful sensations Zoro was causing inside of him. He thrust his hips upwards, rubbing against Zoro's arousal.

"Needy little Marimo, aren't you?" Sanji teased.

"You know I'm not little," Zoro said through clenched teeth. "I'm bigger than you, in height and other areas."

"Only by a centimetre."

"An inch and a half in another case," Zoro told him.

"Still holding onto your manly pride?" Sanji whispered into Zoro's neck, biting down gently on the junction between his neck and shoulders.

"It's … hah … all I have left, isn't it?" Zoro asked, trying to disguise his moan by turning it into a grunt.

"Why don't you just … let it go?" Sanji suggested, moving from Zoro's neck to his ear, taking an earring into his mouth and tugging gently.

"Tempting," Zoro gasped and Sanji was surprised he was still able to talk in the state he was in. "But there's no way I'm losing to you."

"We'll see about that." Sanji licked the outer shell of Zoro's ear and felt the swordsman shudder against him. He poked his tongue into Zoro's ear and the swordsman's breath caught in his throat.

"Did you just give me a wet willy?"

"Was that my finger?" Sanji retorted. He moved from Zoro's ear (but not before tugging again at those golden hoops and forcing Zoro to release a sigh) and down to his torso, letting his fingers trail near the hem of the man's shirt, but not touching him. Zoro made a whining noise Sanji was sure he would deny if later asked about it, trying to push himself closer to him.

He let his hand move lower down, to the hem of Zoro's pants. He slipped underneath the material. His finger paused near Zoro's hole, letting it ghost over it. It still felt so small, Sanji wanted to probe at it slowly. He let the slightest bit of his fingernail enter Zoro and watched as the man writhed under him.

"S-Sanji …"

Sanji let his finger leave, stroking Zoro slowly. He had never really taken the time to touch Zoro's ass but it felt amazing under his fingers. He squeezed gently and Zoro gasped.

"Sanji, please …"

Sanji smirked. He pushed the tip of his middle finger into Zoro, who was trying to take more in him. He was still unbearably tight, if they were going to do this, they'd need lube, but for now, Sanji was fine with fighting against the tight sphincter, listening to Zoro's half-spoken pleas because of course, the swordsman would never sink so low as to beg.

 _RING! RING!_

"Leave it," Zoro said, immediately. "Probably some fucker trying to sell shit."

Sanji nodded, not that he was going to reach for the wireless phone next to Zoro's bed. He was having too much fun teasing him. Sanji knew he was too tired to go all the way, but that didn't mean he couldn't torture the man.

He let his finger enter Zoro to the knuckle, ignoring the sounds of the phone ringing, instead focusing on Zoro's laboured breathing as he tried to get Sanji to go faster but Sanji made sure he was slow as he gently pulled his finger in and out of Zoro.

"Another," Zoro said softly. "Please, Sanji, I need more."

The last ring rang on the phone and the sound of the answering machine sounded.

"Hey, you've reached Zoro, can't get to the phone, leave your name and number and all that shit."

 _Beep. Beep._

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You've gotta change your answering machine."

"Is now really the time to talk about it?" Zoro asked. "I'll add you into the message later, alright?"

Sanji grinned. "Okay." He was about to push in a little farther into Zoro when he heard the message begin.

"Um, hi, you don't really know me but I know Sanji lives with you now so …"

Sanji froze. That was Moodie.

He pulled his fingers out of Zoro, much to the swordsman's disappointment and reached over to grab the phone, hoping that the phone would let him answer even though the message was being left.

"Hello?" he asked, speaking into the phone frantically. Dear God, tell him it worked. He hadn't spoken to Moodie in so long, he hadn't seen her that day he had gone to the Baratie and he had missed her.

Zoro rolled his eyes and grumbled.

Sanji gave him a look. _Interrupt me and you're dead._

"Sanji? Is that really you?"

"Yeah, it's me," Sanji replied, watching as Zoro got up from the bed and stomped out, much like a four year old about to have a tantrum. Sanji would take care of him later, right now he had to speak to the woman he hadn't seen in forever. "How did you get this number?"

"I asked around," Moodie replied. "I got it from some man named Smoker. He said he was kind of like Zoro's agent when it came to his competitions so he had his number. It took me a while to convince him to give it to me."

Sanji nodded, but then realized Moodie couldn't see him. "So uh, why did you call?"

"I haven't heard from you in ages, Sanji." Her voice was soft, gentle.

Sanji paused for a moment. "Wait, how do you know Zoro?"

"I met him," Moodie replied. "He came to the Baratie a few months ago. He cares very deeply for you Sanji, you know."

"Believe me, I know," Sanji said, his voice turning softer without his own knowledge. "How's Fullbody?" He gritted his teeth. He didn't want to talk about it, but he knew he had to.

"I wouldn't know," Moodie replied.

"What?"

"We're not engaged anymore," Moodie explained. "The same day Zoro came over, I ended it with him. He wasn't happy, but I made him give up on the marriage." Sanji could practically feel her smile through the phone, she was clearly overjoyed. "You sound good Sanji. What changed?"

Sanji grinned stupidly. "A lot," he admitted.

"Well tell me about it!" Moodie insisted.

Sanji bit his bottom lip. How was he supposed to explain everything that had happened to him? There was just too much. "Maybe another time," he said. "I'll give you my cell number and we can catch up then."

"Of course, you should get back to Zoro."

Sanji's mouth nearly dropped open. "W-what?"

Moodie chuckled softly. "Don't think I don't know what a man sounds like when he's on the verge of having sex."

Sanji couldn't stop the choke that escaped his lips. "Huh?!"

"I'm not an idiot Sanji," Moodie said. "Though I was oblivious to what happened to you when you were at the Baratie, I know these sorts of things."

Sanji nodded, swallowing a lump in his throat. "You're okay with it? That we're …" He trailed off. Moodie had been his first crush, the first person he had wanted to look at him differently, the first person he had wanted to date, the first person he was attracted to when he finally learnt what it meant when his stomach did that weird flip-flop thing that made him just the slightest bit sick. He remembered when she had looked at him with those defeated eyes.

 _"If you were only a few years older, or perhaps I were a few years younger …"_

At that time, he hadn't even thought anything of it, though he had known what she had been implying. That she had wanted that with him, it almost made him smile sadly. Maybe if she had come a few years earlier, before Zoro, maybe he'd have taken her up on her offer.

 _Just a little too much, just a little too late,_ he thought to himself.

"Times are changing," Moodie said. She was silent for a moment before she spoke again. "Do you think you'll marry him?"

"What?" Sanji asked, the word escaping his lips like a gasp of disbelief.

"Do you think you'll marry Zoro?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip.

He could hear Zoro and the white noise of the TV while he watched yet another stupid drama. He could still feel Zoro's presence, he was in his room after all, the smell of him surrounding him, the bed still warm next to him.

Sanji shook his head and sighed. "You know we can't do that."

"I'm not asking you if the law will let you marry him," Moodie said in a soft voice. "I'm asking you if _you_ want to marry him."

Sanji could feel tears brimming, his vision becoming blurry and hazy. "Moodie …"

"If you could, would you?"

Sanji let out a sigh. "In a heartbeat." Sanji shook his head. "But Moodie—"

"No buts about it," she cut him off. "You deserve to be happy, Sanji."

"I am happy," Sanji said and he found himself meaning it more than he ever had before in all his life. "I am."

"But …?"

Sanji took a deep breath, inhaling through his nose, letting the smell of Zoro envelop him. "But I'm waiting for the fallout. It's not possible to be this happy," he said. "Even if this isn't a dream, that just means it's going to hurt even more when it all backfires."

"Not everything goes wrong, Sanji," Moodie told him. "Not if you don't let it."

Sanji bit his lip. "I have to go, Moodie."

"Of course," she replied. "Just think about what I said, okay, Sanji?"

"I will."

"I'm serious. If you want to marry him, then do it. Elope somewhere."

"Because that went so well for Romeo and Juliet," Sanji sneered.

"Sanji."

"I know."

With that, he hung up.

Sitting on the bed for a moment of silence, Sanji let what Moodie said settle on him. He thought about it, about what that would be like, if he and Zoro were married. He was twenty-four, what did he know about what he wanted? But all the same …

Sanji shook his head.

 _If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. Remember that. You're happy with what you have. He loves you, you love him. There can't be anything better than this, now stop thinking about the damage control you'll suffer when its over and just enjoy it._

Sanji was happy. He loved Zoro, honestly and truly. At the same time though, he knew, in the back of his mind, he wanted to know.

What would it be like to say vows? Have an actual honeymoon? Sleep in the same bed, in the same house, wake up to them every day, knowing they'll be there? What would it be like?

To be honest, an eternity with Zoro didn't sound all that bad.

He wouldn't mind it. He wouldn't mind it at all.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : The thank-yous!_

 _Random Person (x2) : Yeah, the French talking's going to come in later, but it will come! Also, in order to work more on Sanji's point of view, (cause I kinda suck at it, I know), I decided that a lot of stories will be primarily told by Sanji's point of view so I get better at it. Stories like **Tag** , **Speechless** , **The Yakuza's Son** and **Of Denial, Crookedness and Sexy Therapists** will also be told primarily by Sanji. Of course I do love Zoro's character so there will be his point of view in plenty of places, just not as frequently as Sanji's. I do hope to be able to find a story where I can do an alternating point of view like this one soon though as well._

 _JustCallMeLucie: Thanks!_

 _Shizuka Taiyou (x2): Well I randomly had French sneak up on me for that chapter so it just kind of was THERE. I feel like I'm going on a marathon here though, keep screwing up wonderful characters, Kuina is now on that list. I had fun there, I was just like, Sanji had a horrible, submissive memory in the kitchen, let's have a hot, steamy, dominant one! So yeah, me evening out Sanji's bad memories and well, using oil._

 _S.P. Tripathi: You're right, I really do need to go through the chapter again, which is what I'll be doing. As for our little thing, I plan on it being the 25th story I publish (you know, one that's a big deal) so it might not come out for a while since I want it to be really good. I'm reading some **Harry Potter** stuff to refresh my memory (haven't touched that archive in forever to be honest ...)_

 _rlk19952 : You're right!_

 _lilcutieprincess : Well, it seems I'm updating more on Saturdays, doesn't it? It's been a pretty busy week so I was pretty happy I got this chapter done, but chapter 39 will take longer. I plan on it being longer than the Valentine's Day chapter, which, need I remind you, was over 13 thousand words._

 _crystalbluefox : Okay, I don't know if I mentioned it to you, but I LOVE long reviews, they make me really happy when the e-mail I get notifying me of the review is like, "The message has been shortened due to its length". I have to say, you might've sent me the longest review I've ever received! Thank you senpai! The fact that someone so much older than me is appreciating my works, it makes me beyond happy! If I do start **Like Heroin** or **The Yakuza's Son** in November, the problem will be that I'll be in an exam period throughout December and then off to Florida for two weeks so you guys wouldn't hear from me for like, a month. Then again, to publish a first chapter and watch the reaction for a while could be good. I also always come back from trips with a million new ideas. I think it's cause I need to get out more. I don't know if you meant to share something so personal about yourself about your grandfather, but I really appreciate that you let a complete stranger know about your troubles and such._

 _Nachtwolke : Kenshin, or Himura Kenshin (I think it's Himura, it could be something like that, I haven't read it in a while) is the main protagonist of **Rurouni Kenshin,** about a wandering swordsmans who has vowed never to kill again, in the meiji period (I think) where they've banned swords. He fights to protect those who are around him and though he cannot protect everyone, he will settle for those within his sight. I really do love the series, I make several mentions of it in the story, the most obvious one being that for Sanji's birthday, they go to see the last live action **Rurouni Kenshin** film. I need four math books because the government is stupid and can't condense all the learning material into one book, so now it's in two and as for the other two math books, it's cause the government ones have like no exercises in it, so yeah, now I have four math textbooks. And yes, Sanji will speak more French and get Zoro all hot and bothered in public, but as you could tell, not in this chapter._

 _Now what did Zoro tell Sanji? The first thing he said was **"You're beautiful, you're really beautiful",** then the next thing he said which was much longer, was this: **"You're mine. And I'm yours, always. I love you, Sanji, I love you so much. You're mine, only for me, no one else can have you and it's the same for me, I'm also yours, only yours, no one else's. I love you."** So I don't think anywhere in this story these boys will say "I love you" properly and written in the English dialect, but there's something about other languages that I very much enjoy._

 _Now for my question **: when Moodie mentions marriage, in one version (which I realize is not this one) she mentions the US and Sweden. Now here's my question: what are the the LGBT rights in Sweden? Do you think Sweden is going the right way with their LGBT rights?**_

 _Now for another question: **have you voted yet? B** ecause I really would like to know. I've worked a lot on **Speechless** , on the ride to school I'm writing it in this notebook and praying no one reads over my shoulder, and I've written a couple thousand words for **The Yakuza Son**. I've got a bit for **Tag** done too. I plan on writing them all, but I really want to know what you guys want to be published first. I also have plots planned out for chapters of the **Sexy Therapist** story._

 _Last but not least: here's a fun question. **How old do you think I, the writer of this story, am?** I'm really interested in knowing. Afterwards, tell me if you actually do want to know my age._


	39. Break Away

_**Author's Note:** Okay so I owe you guys this chapter for a while now but it was much harder to write than I thought it would be. I did make it past 13 thousand words, but just barely. The chapter after this might also take some time, but otherwise, the update schedule should become normal. I took a lot liberty with just about everything in this entire chapter, so yeah ... There's a lot of French in here, but translations are also provided. I'm sorry it took so long to get this thing up, I got sick for a while and then other stuff happened and yeah ... And One Piece has officially made me cry twice. Goddammit, Chopper and his backstory and then the farewell to Vivi ... DAMMIT! Anyway, the responses to the reviews will be below at the end, the trip to France is not over yet, we've still got three and a half more days left. I'm trying to edit past chapters and stuff and I'm thinking about what I'll be working on next, which I'm not sure about so I'll repeat: please answer my poll about my next story, it helps me know what I'll be doing next! I don't own **One Piece** , or **Death Note,** or anything else mentioned that I can't remember. Oh yeah, and Oji-san, in case you didn't know, means either "uncle" or "old man". Another thing I want to mention about the French language. "Vous" and "tu". You use the term "vous" when you're either speaking to someone who is older than you, or who is more experienced, or who you don't know well. If you were a student in a French course, you would do something calling "vous-voyez" the teacher, addressing them as "vous". "Vous" and "tu" both mean "you", in a sense, normally "vous" is also used for plural for when you're speaking to a group of people. I guess the "vous" and "tu" thing is kind of like addressing someone in Japan with their first name without any honorific. Zoro "vous-voyez"s all the strangers he meets and they do it to him, but when he speaks to Sanji, he uses "tu". Just a little something to note._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS for this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster_ :**

 **Mentions of past horribleness of cooks and such**

 **Getting hot in an art gallery**

 **Nothing else I can really think of ...**

* * *

Chapter 39: Break Away

 _Opened my eyes this mornin' with a smile on my face  
My arms wrapped around you took me away  
And it got me to thinkin' what we need to do  
Is take a Sunday drive and drive on through  
Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday too  
Let's disappear, gotta jet out of here  
Feel the wind across our face  
We'll have some fun, gonna dance on the run  
It's a perfect day to break away_

 _—_ Rascal Flatts _, Break Away_

* * *

Why the fuck was it so fucking expensive to leave the country?

It wasn't as though Zoro was going to take Sanji off somewhere expensive like Rome or something.

 _Well then again, I don't think I'd mind hearing him speak Italian …_

Zoro shook his head. No, that wasn't what he was supposed to be focusing on. Rather, he should be more concentrated on the idea that they had been in a relationship for over three months and they hadn't gone anywhere together except for the grocery store and the occasional kendo tournament. Zoro wanted to leave the country, he wanted to escape everything for a while, see what it was like to being with Sanji twenty-four seven with no interruptions, their own personal schedule where they could do whatever they wanted without worrying about rent or seeing Luffy or dealing with damage control from another one of Usopp's lies.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing!" Zoro slammed his hands down on the counter, trying to hide the blush that was probably starting to surface on his cheeks. "Why? What do you think I was doing?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Whatever Marimo."

" _Merde_... " Zoro muttered under his breath. "Sanji, how much French do you know?"

"Um, why?"

Zoro grinned. He may not have enough money to go across the world to somewhere like Canada or the Caribbean but he had a few couple thousand euros. "Just tell me, how much do you know?"

"Just standard French that chefs know really," Sanji said with a shrug. " _Bonjour, bon appétit,_ simple stuff like that."

"So when you said _mange ta merde_ to those cooks, did you know what you were saying?"

Sanji shook his head. Zoro found this to be endlessly amusing to him. "You insulted them and didn't know what you even told them?"

"I think _they_ know what I told them." Sanji bit his bottom lip. "What did I say?"

" _Mange ta merde,_ it translates to eat your shit," Zoro said. "I just can't believe you told them that without even knowing. You could've been complimenting them for all you knew."

"Well when you said it to me it certainly didn't feel like a compliment," Sanji said. "So I was kind of hoping that I had actually insulted them and wasn't telling them sweet nothings."

"We're going to have to catch you up on some French," Zoro declared. It was official. Besides, he loved hearing the way Sanji spoke French, as though he was meant to. The way the words came off his tongue did unspeakable things to Zoro.

"What? Why? You're not explaining anything!" Sanji complained.

"We," Zoro declared, slamming shut the traveling manual, "are going to France."

* * *

Zoro had almost forgotten how much Sanji enjoyed the sight of a beautiful woman.

"Sanji, this is Vivi, she's Ace's girlfriend."

Sanji smiled at the girl with blue hair. "You're Carue's owner, right?" he asked. "An exotic lady like you having such an exotic pet, it makes perfect sense now."

Vivi laughed. "Ace told me about you, said you were a charmer, I can see what he meant."

Zoro cleared his throat, feeling slightly awkward. "Vivi is the daughter of the head of the Alabasta Air Lines."

"Really?" Sanji asked, his brow raising. It was almost comical to see Sanji's facial expressions when he lifted that absurd eyebrow of his. "I'm sorry to have forced you to take time out of your busy schedule to meet with us."

Vivi laughed. "It's no trouble really." She turned to Zoro. "Now you said you wanted tickets to France?" She shook her head, letting out a soft laugh. "Going off on a honeymoon are you?"

"You know gay marriage isn't legal here," Zoro reminded her.

"I was joking," she said with another laugh. The way Sanji's eyes lit up as she laughed made Zoro's stomach churn. Yes, Sanji was his, they had proven it to each other various times and Sanji loved him, he had even told him so, but it still made Zoro uneasy to see him so flirtatious around women. Further more, it was the way his rather idiotic flirting actually worked. Nami, then Makino, Moodie had liked him, even Vivi! Just about every woman who tended to fall for Sanji's charms was taken. To be honest though, if Zoro were female, he was pretty sure Sanji would be the person he'd cheat on his significant other with. Then Sanji would feel bad for being a home-wrecker and— oh dear God, he was putting too much thought into this, wasn't he?

"Yeah, we'd be going for about a week."

Vivi turned to Sanji. " _Parlez-vous français_?"

Sanji gave her a blank look.

"I'll take that as a no then."

"You know French?" asked Sanji, confused.

"A little, Zoro taught me a bit," Vivi said. "He said you were a chef, right? You don't know French?"

"Only names of dishes," Sanji admitted sheepishly.

"Well, Zoro'll fix that right up, won't you, _salaud_?" Though she had just called him a bastard, she said it in an affectionate way.

"Anyway, we need tickets, you can pull some strings, right? I know it's kinda short notice but …" Zoro trailed off and blushed. Was it strange to admit he desperately wanted to get out of the country with Sanji by his side, without anyone to disturb or interrupt them? Probably.

"You'll have them in two days. I can get you tickets for a two-way for France, you just need to tell me when you want to leave. There are a few flights to France coming in the upcoming weeks."

Zoro looked at Sanji. Sanji was a fast learner, he just needed to know the very basics of the French language to get around, besides, Zoro could be his translator. "We can be ready to leave in say … two weeks? Sound good to you?"

Sanji nodded. "I guess, yeah."

Zoro nodded. "Can you get us tickets for a flight for two weeks from now?"

"Of course," Vivi said with a grin. "Should I leave you two alone now? You need to bring Sanji up to date with _la langue de l'amour._ "

Zoro smirked. "Oh, he'll be well-versed by the end of the two weeks."

Sanji felt imminent doom coming upon him at that very moment.

* * *

"Okay, let's start with the basics," said Zoro. He hated to admit it, but it was making him giddy, just thinking of Sanji speaking in French, the way he spoke at the Baratie had sent chills down his spine and lead to an almost visible problem that would've been difficult to explain. " _Bonjour, je m'appelle Zoro_."

"Which means ….?"

Zoro enjoyed knowing something the blond didn't, it made him feel as though he had some strange sort of power over him. "Okay, I just said 'hello, my name is Zoro'. You try it."

" _Bonjour, je m'appeel_ —"

" _Pelle_ ," Zoro corrected. " _Je m'appelle_ , not peel. Peel is just … That's not even a word in French."

" _Bonjour_ ," Sanji tried again. " _Je m'appelle_ _Sanji_."

"Good." Zoro tried to ignore the shiver of delight that ran down his spine. "Okay let's see … what else is important? How about ordering food?"

It was almost comical the way Sanji's eyes seemed to light up at the mention of food.

"They have French wine, don't they?"

"Well I should hope they do, it's France after all," Zoro said with a light chuckle.

Sanji's eyes glazed over in a way only a cook's could at the prospect of having French wine from France, while in France. It was almost as creepy as when his eyes became hearts and he started fluttering around the room.

"Hello? Are we getting back to our lesson now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. _That's it, I've lost him to the wine side._

"Huh?" Sanji blinked. "Oh yeah, right. You were saying something?"

Zoro shook his head. "Never mind, you know what? We can go to France and you can just learn the language from hearing it."

"I hear the Osaka accent all the time, I haven't picked up all their weird ways of speech."

"I have a friend from Osaka," Zoro said, "and they don't talk weird."

Sanji raised an eyebrow. "Whatever." He went quiet for a moment before speaking again. "There was something you said … You say it a lot now that I think about it … Um … _je t'aime._ What does that mean?"

Zoro's ears turned red and he turned his head away. "D-don't just say that," he said, rolling his eyes. "Ahou, you don't just throw it around."

Sanji seemed to be lost in concentration, remembering something before he started blushing. "So … _that's_ what it means …"

"What?" Zoro squeaked.

"I think I get it now," Sanji said. "I think."

"W-what do you think it means?" Zoro asked, slowly, almost cautiously, turning towards Sanji again.

"W-well, I mean, what do _you_ think it means?" Sanji spluttered, turning red himself.

"Ahou, I'm the one who knows French, I know what it means!" Zoro snapped. "Do you?" he asked in a quieter voice.

 _If we're not on the same page right now, this could be very awkward._

"On my birthday …. Before I passed out, we were talking, weren't we? On the porch step, right? I don't remember too much about what happened before I passed out, but you were stalling about something, right? Then you mentioned it again later, you told me … You told me you loved me."

Zoro nodded, the blush spreading from his ears to his cheeks to his neck. It almost looked like a bad rash.

"Before you told me though, you said something. Something in French. I think you said _je t'aime_."

"And if I did?" asked Zoro, trying to keep his voice under control.

" _Je t'aime_ , it's the same thing, isn't it? As aishiteru, right?"

Zoro played with his fingers, suddenly very interested in a small scar on the knuckle of his ring finger.

"Zoro? Is that what _je t'aime_ means?" Sanji pressed.

"Maybe …"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Ahou, only you'd manage to switch to a different language when it really counts."

"I said it in the end, didn't I?" Zoro demanded, trying to disguise his embarrassment as anger.

"Of course you did, Marimo. After, you know, fumbling in European tongue."

Zoro crossed his arms in a huff. "Yeah well, s'not my fault you don't know the language, I just happened to take an interest in the language. I know a bit of English too, and you know Latin. Who the fuck cares about Latin anymore? It died with the Empire, didn't it? You're going to go all Julius Cesar on me? Wait, didn't that Shakespeare guy write a play with that name? Why the fuck are his stories so sad anyway? And who the fuck wants to be like Romeo and Juliet? They fucking die at the end, and they probably wouldn't have if they hadn't been fucking morons. And I've seen the movie, Nami made me watch it. Those weird puffy things on their arms make them look fucking retarded —"

" _Je t'aime_ , Marimo."

Zoro stood up immediately from his seat.

"Where are you going?"

"Need to take a shower."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Haneda Airport (in Tokyo)**

 **Time: 7:23 AM JST**

 **Time till Flight: 4 hours and 7 minutes**

* * *

"Why the fuck did you pack so much shit?!"

"It's not shit!" Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "And aren't you a swordsman? Stop complaining, it can't be that heavy!"

"It's fucking heavy when it's loaded with only the Lord knows how many fucking shit-loads of clothes in it!" Zoro snapped. "Get us a carrier thing, we'll just dump this shit on there and then we can get ourselves body checked and all that shit."

Sanji sighed. "Honestly, someone would think you're a foreigner." He shook his head and flashed the woman behind the counter a smile. "I apologize for my friend's behaviour, he's a bit of an idiot." He lifted Zoro's suitcase onto the scale and watched as the numbers rose. The woman put a sticker on the bag before it went off to that secret place that suitcases went after they were weighed.

Zoro gritted his teeth. "My friend"? Since when the fuck was he Sanji's friend? He huffed, shoving Sanji's suitcase onto the scale and smirked. "Told you it was full of shit."

"Don't speak that way in front of a lady!" Sanji snapped. He thanked the woman behind the counter and he and Zoro trudged off to get their bags checked. International travelling, Zoro remembered now why he didn't do it unless it was for the sake of a tournament.

When they got into the line where you were to wait for them to check and make sure you didn't have anything you weren't allowed to bring, Sanji glanced at Zoro.

"You uh, you didn't pack your swords, did you?"

"You think they'd let me fly out of the country while I had three katanas on me?" Zoro asked. He rolled his eyes. "Of course I didn't pack them."

"Thank God—"

"In my carry-on," Zoro finished.

Sanji stared at him. "You could get arrested for that!" He ran his fingers through his hair, "I'm planning on leaving the country with a criminal?"

"Look if they knew what you could do with your feet then they wouldn't let you have your legs anymore." _And what a shame that would be._ "Besides, it doesn't matter, so long as I don't get caught. And you won't tell on me, will you?" he teased.

Sanji shook his head. "Baka, that'd be stupid, then you'd go to jail and I'd have no one to translate everything to me."

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Good to know I mean so much to you."

He put his carry-on into a bin and kicked off his shoes, shedding his coat. He waited for Sanji to do the same, taking his phone out of his bag and placing it in a separate bin. Sanji just stared at him.

"What?" asked Zoro.

"What are you doing?"

"What do you mean what am I doing?" Zoro gave him a strange look. "Take off your blazer, Curly Brow. And your shoes. Also, empty your pockets."

Zoro slowly took his earrings out as well, placing them in the bin too.

"Why would I have to do that?"

"Because the metal detector might go off if you accidentally kept something in your pocket, dipshit," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. He undid his belt and put it in the bin too, watching as Sanji blushed darkly. "Have you never done this before?"

"I … uh …" Sanji blinked. "I never really needed to leave the country. I have a passport, don't worry, but I just …"

Realization dawned on Zoro. "So it's your first time, is it?" He smirked. "I'll make sure it's good for you."

The innuendo was not lost on Sanji.

"S-so what do I do?" stuttered the blond.

"Take off your blazer and your shoes. If you're wearing a belt, take that off too and empty your pockets. You put the carry-on in the bin and then you're going to walk through that giant machine," Zoro said, making a gesturing motion with his head towards the large machine.

"T-that thing?"

"Yeah, why, scared cook?" Zoro teased.

Sanji glared at him, but seemed a bit uncomfortable.

"D-do I have to?" asked Sanji.

"Well I mean, the alternative is to get a pat-down," Zoro said with a shrug. "Would you like some random bulky stranger patting different parts of your body?"

Sanji looked at the machine. "Maybe …"

Zoro stared at him. "I was joking," he said. The idea of someone other than him touching Sanji in that way, even if the man on duty wasn't trying to be sexual, made Zoro see red. Sanji was his, and Zoro didn't give a damn if he sounded possessive.

"Right …"

Zoro looked at Sanji a tad closer. "You were serious?"

"Small spaces …" Sanji shook his head. "I'm not claustrophobic, that'd be stupid, but … small spaces … They're …" He shook a little as he spoke and Zoro knew instantly that Sanji would not be going into the machine. "Claustrophobia … it's not a phobia, I'm not _scared_ , I'm just … not very fond …"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "You don't need to justify yourself to me. But even if you are going to be pat down, you need to empty your pockets and take off your blazer."

Zoro wondered which Sanji feared more. Being patted down by a complete stranger, or being inside a small, confining space. Sanji had a deep respect for his body, Zoro could understand that, he had come to appreciate his body and didn't want to ever go through the same feeling as he had that horrible day at the Baratie, but was he really more scared of closed spaces than being touched, practically molested, by a man in a uniform?

Sanji nodded and shakily took off his blazer, putting it in the bin and emptying his pockets. Zoro walked through the machine, pleased it did not go off and then gave Sanji an encouraging look as he explained to the man he'd prefer not to go through the machine.

Zoro watched, putting his shoes on, as Sanji was patted down. He saw the way he tensed as the man's large hands roughly smacked his body, over his chest, his legs, his arms. As they ran their big, meaty hands over Sanji's arms, his shirt sleeve rolled up slightly and Sanji jumped away.

The man tried to pull him back but Sanji stepped away from him.

"C-can you not?" asked Sanji in a timid voice.

The security guard shook his head. "Protocol's protocol—"

"The man wants his personal space!" Zoro cut in, stepping through the machine backwards. It went off from his earrings, but he didn't care. "Do you honestly think he's holding a weapon on him? Look at him, the man's a toothpick! You think he'd be a yakuza boss?" Zoro snorted.

"Uh sir," said the woman behind the scanner. "The alarm—"

"Is jewellery a sin?" Zoro demanded. He grabbed Sanji by his arm and quickly pulled him through the machine. "If you think he's some sort of threat to society, take it up with me, alright?" Zoro demanded, picking up his carry-on along with Sanji's and the blond's blazer. "Come on, let's go."

"Zoro—"

"Let's go," Zoro repeated. "C'mon!"

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Haneda Airport (in Tokyo)**

 **Time: 9:42 AM JST**

 **Time till Flight: 1 hours and 48 minutes**

* * *

Getting to the airport so early in the morning probably wasn't the greatest idea Zoro had ever had. In fact, almost two hours later and waiting at a terminal port had never been more boring.

"Is it always like this?" asked Sanji, raising an eyebrow.

"Pretty much," Zoro replied dryly. He turned his head to Sanji. "Play a game?"

Sanji grinned. "How about … Never Have I Ever?"

Zoro snorted. "Something so boring?"

"Well, I would suggest others, except none are appropriate for the public eye."

 _Fuck, he's going to kill me._

"Fine. Who starts?"

"I will." Sanji bit his bottom lip in concentration. "Never have I ever … Gone to the circus."

Zoro put a finger down. "It was crappy," he added. "Okay … Never have I ever smoked."

Sanji gritted his teeth and put down a finger. "You're _trying_ to make me lose."

"What? Me?" Zoro shook his head as though he were innocent. Of course, they both knew he wasn't.

"Never have I ever … been an alcoholic," Sanji said, sending a knowing look in Zoro's direction.

Zoro shook his head. "Nope."

"Liar!"

"Look, I might've liked my booze, but that doesn't make me an alcoholic—"

"It so does!" Sanji said.

"Okay wait, so **if I drink alcohol, then I'm an alcoholic. If I drink fanta, does that mean I'm fantastic**?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Doesn't matter Marimo, just put a finger down."

Zoro sighed and did as he was told. "Never have I ever …" He thought for a moment. The thing he realized about this game was that, if he was purposely out to get Sanji, to make him lose, it would be easy. But that would be saying things he didn't want to say. Because of his crazy circle of friends, Zoro had gone on many adventures that involved mind-boggling stupidity. There was that time Luffy decided it would be a good idea to jump on a plane, not knowing the exact destination and just see where they ended up. Or when he decided he wanted to get on a bus and jump off where the most people got off. A pre-historic museum. Fun. There was the harmless fun they got into and then there was the time they dragged themselves into a big robbery and ended up stopping some petty thief. Sanji had lived a pretty sheltered life, there were few things Sanji had done that Zoro hadn't done, including being a waiter. At some point during his freshman year of college he had ended up working at a coffee shop. He was fired four days later, but that hardly mattered, after all, it wasn't his fault the coffee machine was possessed. There were things Sanji had gone through that Zoro couldn't even imagine, none of which he dared to say. He couldn't very well say "never have I ever been raped", that wasn't something you just blurted out in the middle of a game of silliness. "Never have I ever …" He took a deep breath, thinking. "Never have I ever gone to a wedding."

Sanji seemed to be deep in thought as he seemed to search through his archive of memories for his answer. He shook his head and kept his finger up. "Never have I ever been arrested."

Zoro gritted his teeth and put down a finger.

"I thought you said you had to bail your friends out of jail, since when did you land behind bars?"

"Several times actually," Zoro said. "Let's see … disorderly conduct, urinating on private property, setting a pool on fire, wrestling with a cashier at the convenience store, driving without my seatbelt on, being allegedly intoxicated while behind the wheel, doing the electric slide down a bowling alley, bad karaoke singing—"

"Bad karaoke?" Sanji repeated, his jaw practically dropping. "Electric slides?"

"Disorderly conduct, there were too many of those, the urination thing … that was I think sometime when I first got truly wasted, the pool on fire was a crazy frat party. The fight with the convenience store clerk, I don't even remember, I think it was something about how he miscounted my money … I forgot to put on my seatbelt a few times, and even though I had been drinking, I wasn't drunk, I have higher tolerance than others think. The electric slide was a dare from Luffy and the karaoke … I think the bartender was drunk when he filed that complaint."

"I'm dating a criminal," Sanji muttered under his breath.

Zoro grinned cheekily. "Take a walk on the dark side, why don't you cook? My turn," Zoro declared. "Never have I ever … Done yoga."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Never have I ever … gone to a party."

Zoro put down a finger but stared at him strangely. "You've never gone to a party?" Zoro shook his head. "We've got to change that."

"Oh yes, let's go party crashing in France, why don't we?" Sanji rolled his eyes. "Your turn."

Zoro shook his head. "Nah, I'm bored again." He checked his watched. "It's almost eleven. That gives us thirty minutes. Come on."

"Come on where?" asked Sanji.

A scary grin surfaced on Zoro's lips. "Never have I ever made out in a bathroom stall." Sanji's eyes widened. "Yet." With that, he grabbed the shocked Sanji's arm and dragged him off to the bathroom.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Haneda Airport (in Tokyo)**

 **Time: 10:45 AM JST**

 **Time till Flight: 45 minutes**

* * *

Zoro pushed Sanji up against the bathroom stall door and pressed his lips against his. Even if Sanji hadn't had a cigarette in a month, his lips still tasted faintly of nicotine. Zoro briefly wondered if it was possible to develop a nicotine addiction without ever having actually personally had any.

Zoro's hands reached up and gripped Sanji's hair, pressing himself against him. Sanji's arms wrapped around him, one of his legs sneakily wrapping around Zoro's ankle and forcing him to stumble even closer to him.

Nothing Zoro had ever done caused such a reaction out of him. He realized in this moment that something about Sanji made him different from every one else Zoro had ever dared to endeavour into a romantic relationship with.

It wasn't that he was male. No, it couldn't be that. Of course, there was a constant reminder; Sanji's tone of voice that made his breath hitch, the light stubble on his chin, his flat chest, his pressing erection, there were many things that made him different from other relationships Zoro had been in, but it wasn't that.

It wasn't that he had been into smoking. Zoro had been with others who liked to smoke, who liked to drink, of course, not as excessively as Sanji, but still, it hadn't been the first time he had tasted nicotine in a kiss.

It wasn't even Sanji's backstory. Though Zoro had never met someone with such a tragic story as Sanji's, it wasn't that that made their relationship so much different.

Maybe it was just Sanji? Maybe it was their development? But somehow, whenever he was with Sanji, others became a memory to him, a name he recalled faintly in the back of his mind, no face, no real tangibility, just a faintly familiar name he had perhaps heard before in passing.

Zoro had had more passionate lovers than Sanji, ones who were less embarrassed when it came to the act of sex. Though Zoro had only been with three people before Sanji, they had all been vastly different. He had been with a woman who was more daring, almost all of his partners were more confident than Sanji. They had a drive, a passion, they were devoted and they were sure of their end goal, nothing being able to stop them. It was determination that caused Zoro to be attracted in the first place. And Sanji had it, he just didn't have the same self-assurance within himself, the same self-esteem that drove the others. He was humbler, he was … fuck, Zoro didn't even know.

It could be the way Sanji always seemed to have an air of mystery to him, even the more Zoro found out about him. The way his curtain of hair seemed to separate him from others, promising secrets and stories that had never been heard before.

It could've been the way Sanji's blue eye sparkled whenever he spoke of something he loved, the way he looked like a child on Christmas day.

It could be the way he kicked ass and came alive when he was fighting, as though his entire being and spirit went into it. He divided his passion between his cooking and his fighting and yet you couldn't tell there was anything missing, it was as though each thing he put his passion into, you'd think it was the only thing.

It could be the way he rolled that cigarette in his hand a thousand times before he decided to light it.

It could be the way no matter what kind of fight he got into, his blazer always came out perfectly pressed and flawless.

It could be the way he had such coarse language and yet was politer than anyone Zoro had ever met.

It could be the way he seemed so innocent and yet corrupted at the same time.

It could be the way he said his name.

Maybe it was the way he would roll his eyes and laugh at you with his eyes sparkling.

The way he turned his head away from a compliment?

How he still refused to sit when it came to entering Nami's house, unless she forced him to? The way he always seemed prepared for someone to go running off, leaving him behind?

The way he gave you a slow, almost shy smile.

How he wrote in the column of all of Zoro's old, dusty cook-books, adding in new ingredients, putting in recommendations until you could almost relabel it Sanji's Cook Book.

The way he'd sit up perfectly straight on the couch, not a slouch in sight.

The way he curled in on himself when he slept, his back facing Zoro on the bed until Zoro repositioned him while he was still sleeping and slowly, the tension left Sanji's body.

How Zoro easily got addicted to the way Sanji so much as breathed.

Zoro didn't fucking know, he just knew that he loved this man more than he had loved anyone before.

"Z-Zoro, we're going to be late," Sanji gasped against him, pushing against his chest lightly to pull him away.

When Zoro backed off slightly, Sanji gripped his shirt, keeping him close still. "Screw the plane," said Zoro, beginning to trail kisses down Sanji's neck.

"C-can't," Sanji said, swallowing deeply. "We need to get on board."

"Dammit," Zoro muttered against the sensitive skin of Sanji's neck. He pulled away when Sanji pulled him back in for a kiss. "You're sending mixed messages," Zoro warned him playfully.

"Come on," Sanji said, pushing away from him and opening the bathroom stall door.

Zoro sighed. Okay, blue balls for a flight, he could deal with that. Yeah, he could deal with that.

 _Wait …_

 _Tokyo to Paris is a twelve hour flight …_

 _Fuck._

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Haneda Airport (in Tokyo)**

 **Time: 11:20 AM JST**

 **Time till Flight: 10 minutes**

* * *

"Fuck, where's the damn terminal?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Of course you got lost in an airport, it's right over there!" said the cook, pointing.

Zoro squinted. "There?"

"Yes, there, baka! Come on!"

The two men rushed like idiots to the terminal, screaming at the woman behind the desk who was calmly announcing that people from coach could start boarding. Shoving themselves into the line, Zoro and Sanji stood there, trying to catch their breath.

There was a small child who was standing next to them who looked up at Sanji. "Hey, this oji-san's eyebrow's weird!"

Zoro had to stop himself from laughing as Sanji's forehead ticked.

The blond bent down so he was eye-level with the little girl. "What did you just say?" he asked in a rather restrained tone.

"Daddy! This weird guy's picking on me!"

"Wait, no!" Sanji said, hastily. A large man turned around at the sound of the girl's voice just as Sanji stood upright.

"You're picking on my little girl?" he demanded.

"No sir," Sanji said quickly. "No, not at all."

The man nodded slowly. "I hope not, or else you'd get a beating!" The man paused and tilted his head. He turned his attention to Zoro. "What's up with your friend's eyebrows?"

Zoro covered his mouth in an attempt to stop himself from laughing. It was futile.

Sanji glared at him. "Genetics," Sanji cut in. "Sorry for disturbing you."

"She called you oji-san," Zoro said, failing to stifle his laugh.

"I'm not old," Sanji snapped.

"She still called you oji-san," Zoro pointed out.

"You're getting too much joy out of this," Sanji growled.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Haneda Airport (in Tokyo)**

 **Time: 11:35 AM JST**

* * *

"It's been five minutes, why aren't we taking off?"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Impatient much?" He laughed. "They don't always leave exactly as scheduled."

"That's stupid," Sanji declared.

"Yeah well, we've got a twelve hour flight ahead of us, so you'll have plenty of time to sit and ponder the world as you sit here."

Sanji rolled his eyes and bit his lip. "What's it like?"

"What's what like?"

"Take off."

Zoro bit his lip and thought about it. "The plane kind of bumps a bit, it's kind of like driving in a car, but suddenly the car's not on the ground. Does that make sense? It's a bit rough, the runway strip, but once you're off the ground, you're fine. It's landing that's a bit tougher, kind of like skidding."

Sanji gripped the armrest of his seat. "Do we really need to go to France?"

 _"Je voudrais aller avec toi, comme nous avons notre proper nuit de noces._ " Zoro smirked at the confusion on Sanji's face.

"What did you just say?" Sanji fidgeted. "You just insulted me, didn't you?" He shook his head, his knuckles turning white.

Zoro put his hand over Sanji's. "Look, relax," he told him softly. "It's no big deal, we'll be off the ground before you know it."

"That doesn't make me feel any better," Sanji admitted, gulping.

Zoro leaned closer to him, his breath ghosting over the shell of Sanji's ear. "Have you ever done it in an airplane bathroom?"

"What?!"

"Ha, your voice just cracked."

"It didn't!"

"It did it again!"

"Shut up!"

"Oh come on," Zoro teased. "I'm just playing. Though I wonder how that'd work considering the fact that we'd be in the air. Literally taking someone to new heights, eh? Do you think you could keep quiet? The bathroom tends to echo."

This was fun, Sanji was turning redder and redder, his grip tightening on the armrest for a reason other than anxiety.

"You have no shame, do you?" he asked.

"None at all."

"Bastard," Sanji muttered through clenched teeth.

Zoro smirked. "Look out the window."

"Why would I do that?" demanded the blond. "So I'll scare myself out of my wits?" He rolled his eyes. "I'm not a complete idiot."

"Yeah sure, take a look, or are you scared?"

Sanji slowly turned his head to the side. "Holy shit!"

Zoro smirked. "Missed the take off, didn't you?"

Outside the window were large puffy clouds and if you looked down, there were only a few things you could actually see properly, a few noticeable landmarks that scraped the sky high and mightily. Zoro watched as Sanji took in the new view, letting his arms snake around Sanji's body as he peered out the window.

Zoro couldn't figure out why, but after telling Sanji his secret he felt relieved. A weight had been lifted off his shoulders. A secret only his friends had known, it made it strange, as though this relationship he had with Sanji was permanent. There was no going back on this one, it was impossible. Sanji knew his darkest secret now, trusting him with it … It may not have been a big deal to Sanji, but Zoro felt as though the blond knew the importance of what Zoro had told him.

Watching Sanji's almost child-like reaction to being in the sky, Zoro realized that he could still proudly say that he had never done anything in his life he had regretted.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Somewhere in the Sky**

 **Time: 1:35 PM JST**

 **Time till in Paris: 10 hours and 30 minutes**

* * *

Watching Sanji sleep made Zoro feel like a complete and utter pervert.

His entire face seemed to change into something more innocent, more pure. It was almost impossible to believe he was such a foul mouthed man. His expression relaxed as did his body and yet still, he didn't slouch. His hand hadn't left its place on the armrest and neither had Zoro's. Running his thumb over Sanji's knuckles, Zoro found it was strange how a chef like Sanji had such smooth hands.

Zoro hadn't been lying when he said he loved Sanji's hands.

As much as Sanji's legs were drool worthy with their length and power, there was just something about his arms and hands that made Zoro feel giddy. Those small calluses on his fingertips, the scars on his knuckles and palm from some accidents in the kitchen, those marks on his wrists that made Zoro see red, knowing what those damn cooks had driven Sanji to do. The burns and scars from incidents with a burner or a spilt meal, Sanji's history was in his hands. They showed just how much he devoted his life to the art of cooking, his passion and his heart was all there, breathtaking.

Sanji felt fragile to the touch and yet Zoro knew he wasn't, but still …

His eyes moved farther up towards Sanji's bangs.

That asymmetrical face of his was like a secret that he kept from others. His scars on his wrists and arms, those he hid with his blazer, with his sleeves and yet Zoro knew that though maybe some day Sanji could wear those scars with pride, there was no way he'd willingly show someone his eyebrows. It just made it precious to him, and Zoro realized the more time he spent with Sanji, the more his romantic mindset came to him, easier and easier. If Zoro weren't in his own body and were to watch from afar, dear God he'd call himself an idiot. Half the things he said were just plain outrageous and yet still, he said them. Watching that dark blush surface on Sanji's cheeks was so worth it.

And what did the swordsman do, witnessing this beautiful sight?

Why, he poked the cook of course.

"Oi, ahou, get up!"

Sanji opened his eyes blearily and glared at Zoro.

"Had a good dream?" Zoro teased.

"Maybe," Sanji said. He paused for a moment. "Do you smell that?"

"Smell what?"

"There's …" Sanji took a breath before freezing, his eyes widening. "S-someone's smoking," he said. Zoro could see it on his face, the way he registered it.

"Are you okay?" Zoro asked.

"I …" Sanji took a deep breath, unsure of what to say. "I think so …"

"Which direction is it coming from?"

Sanji took a moment to breathe and thought about it. "Behind us."

Zoro unbuckled his seatbelt and lifted up in his seat, turning around. He eyed the passengers behind him, searching for the source of the smoke. Two seats behind them there was a man smoking a pipe. Who even smoked pipes anymore? He was leaning back, lighting up even more. Zoro was beginning to smell it too. He hated the smell of nicotine, he always had. It almost felt like he was the one smoking with how much it surrounded the air. "Hey!" he yelled to the man.

"Zoro, don't," Sanji said. "I'm fine." He looked pale though, he was scared he'd have another attack, Zoro could tell.

"Oi! Bastard!" Zoro yelled, ignoring Sanji's voice. "What the fuck do you think you're doing, lighting up in here?"

The man glared at him. "Who do you think you are, moss-head? I'm allowed to smoke in here!"

"Asshole, there are other people here!"

"If you've got a problem with smoking, you should've asked for a smoke-free area, ahou!" screamed the man back at him. Zoro wished he wouldn't talk, he was bringing his stinking nicotine breath closer to them.

"Put out your damn pipe, old geezer!" Zoro yelled at him.

Sanji pulled at Zoro's shirt. "It's fine Zoro, I'm okay," he insisted. "I'm not a fucking invalid." But Sanji was paler, his voice sounded a tad horse.

Zoro shook his head. "The bastard's being inconsiderate—"

"Zoro," Sanji said in a firm voice. "It's okay." He took a moment to breathe before shaking his head. "I'm not a girl, I don't need saving. Besides," Sanji craned his neck back. "He looks like he's having a good time."

"He's high, that's why!" Zoro snapped.

"Don't stop him," Sanji said. "I know I hate it when someone interrupts my smoke."

"But—"

"Zoro, drop it."

Zoro folded his arms and huffed like a child. _I'm so calling Vivi when we get back. They need a no-smoking policy._ "You have your inhaler?"

"For God's sake Zoro, I'm fine!" Sanji ducked his head lower and coughed into his hand. "Just a little woozy."

Zoro nodded, but he felt his stomach clench nervously. "You're sure?" he asked, just in case Sanji was putting on a brave face and bullshitting him, which was completely possible knowing Sanji.

"Fuck, yes, Zoro!"

Well couldn't those words be taken completely out of context.

Zoro sunk in his seat and crossed his arms with a frown. "Fine, whatever." He swore though, if Sanji started coughing or having a fit, he was taking that fucking pipe straight out of that man's hands and throwing it out the window, regardless of whether or not the airplane's windows actually opened.

"Talk to me," said Sanji suddenly, breaking the silence.

"Huh?"

"Talk to me Marimo," repeated Sanji. "Entertain me."

Zoro could think of a distraction for the man, one that was not suitable for public audiences. He thought about it. "Do you think they have anime on this plane?"

"Huh?"

"TV programming. We'd probably have to look under kids though," Zoro said. He pressed on the TV screen in front of him and nodded. "See, right here. There's some anime in here. Crap, I've never heard of these."

"Oh! _Death Note_!" Sanji grinned widely. "Ready for a marathon?"

Zoro grinned. Sanji seemed to be forgotten the disturbing amount of smoke that was filling up the cabin. That was good, if watching another crappy anime— though Zoro had to admit, not all of the anime Sanji watched was crappy— would have him distracted, then he'd do it in a heartbeat.

"Okay, sure."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Somewhere in the Sky**

 **Time: 1:45 PM JST**

 **Time till in Paris: 10 hours and 20 minutes**

* * *

"Holy shit _what is that_?" demanded Zoro, staring at the strange, ugly creature on the screen before him.

"That's a shinigami," said Sanji, rolling his eyes. "We're on a plane, try to respect others, would you?"

"Wait, but I thought Strawberry was a shinigami. He's not that fucking ugly!"

"Shinigamis are very interpretive in anime culture, if you watched _Soul Eater,_ you'd find different looking shinigamis too."

" _Soul Eater_? He eats souls?"

"Among other things, yes," Sanji said. "Can't we just watch?"

But as always when watching an anime, that was not possible.

"So that weird guy with the weird eyeballs has a notebook which this weird guy in high school— college? How old is that guy with the light brown hair? And who the fuck names their kid Light? That surely means you're in trouble and are going to be bullied, doesn't it?"

"Light Yagami," said Sanji, rolling his eyes. "Who names their kid Zoro?"

"Who the fuck names their kid Sanji?" Zoro shot back. Zoro paused for a moment. "Yagami? As in Y-A-G-A-M-I?"

"Yeah, so?"

"His last name …"

"Yes, I know," said Sanji. "Are you really that immature?"

The show went onwards and Zoro couldn't believe the intelligence they placed on this young boy. If knowledge was power, this Light guy was totally overpowered. "Wait, did he just kill someone?"

"Yes."

"Does he feel no remorse for it? He thinks it's just a coincidence? Holy shit, he's going to do it again?! Doesn't that just make him a killer?" Zoro shook his head. "That book has way too many rules to it."

More scenes passed by and then Zoro's jaw dropped.

"Okay, that book's way too skinny to have so many names in it and still have tons of blank paper! He's going on a killing spree! Shit, he's become insane! He wants to become a god of the new world? Clean it of filth? Do you realize what that means? In the end, he's going to have to kill himself since he's committed all these crimes. Does he feel no ounce of guilt for his killings?!"

"Think of it like this," said Sanji. "You're a powerless teenager, but you're very smart. You see the world around you as full of bad people, your father's in the police force, which means you know even more about crime than others. Suddenly, you're given the power to right all the wrongs others have done. You can get rid of all the dirt that's soiled the Earth, finally make a difference. What would you do in his position?"

"I don't pick up random books that fall from the sky!" Zoro bit his lip. "Should I be concerned that you understand his way of thinking? He's like a total psychopath!"

"Power does weird things to people." Sanji shrugged. "It'd be worse if he had the Death Note and the Geass, we'd be totally screwed."

"What's the Geass?"

"It's from another anime, but basically, it's this thing in someone's eye that gives them the power to command people to do things. The only problem is you're only allowed to ask them to do one thing and you need to have direct eye contact with them."

"Why are there like no female characters in this show?" asked Zoro. "In comparison to those others shows you watch?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Just keep watching."

"Why the fuck is that guy's name just L?"

"What, would you prefer if it was Z?"

"No but what the fuck does it even stand for? He's so anonymous, he's going to fight Light without actually knowing who Light is?" Zoro shook his head. "This is one of those shounen stories where people just immediately make it shounen-ai in their minds, don't they?"

"They do that with everything," Sanji said, rolling his eyes.

"You watch fucked up stuff," Zoro declared. But it was a way to pass the time, so he supposed he shouldn't be complaining. "How many episodes are there?"

"Thirty-seven," said Sanji. "If we had started when we first got on, we'd have had time to watch the whole thing. Instead, we'll be missing the last four episodes."

Through an array of episodes, Zoro just kept making comments.

"Potato chips? Really?"

"L's got a sweet tooth?"

"Did he just touch her ass?"

"HE DID _NOT_ JUST DIE!"

"Why does he sound like a druggie?"

"Light's laugh's insane."

"Light's going to die, isn't he?"

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 1

 **Location: Over Paris**

 **Time: 11:00 AM JST**

 **Time till in Paris: 10 minutes**

* * *

"Attention all passengers, we will soon be landing in Paris shortly. Please shut off any electronics you may have, return to your seats and buckle your seat-belts."

"Hey, Blondie!"

Sanji looked up over his chair to see the little girl from the line earlier. "Hmm?" he asked, trying not to twitch.

"Can you tell oji-san to be quiet? He's really loud."

Sanji stifled a laugh.

Zoro twitched. "Did she just say oji-san?"

Sanji covered his mouth to try to stop himself from laughing, not that it did him any good.

Zoro turned to Sanji. "Hey, how are you about landing?"

"What?"

"Are you going to be okay? You seemed like you were really going to freak out during the take-off."

"I did not!"

"Yeah sure, whatever you say," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. He laced his fingers between Sanji's though. "Do you have any gum?"

"What?"

"Chewing gum helps. When you land, the pressure does something weird to your ears and then you have trouble hearing for a while until you pop them, but it's kinda annoying, so if you chew gum, it'll stop the pressure."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You make no sense." He handed Zoro a piece of gum though.

"You're not going to use it?"

"Why should I?"

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 2

 **Location: Charles de Gaulle Airport (in Paris)**

 **Time: 4:00 AM CETZ**

* * *

"What time is it?" asked Sanji.

"Four in the morning. Seven hour time difference between Tokyo and Paris," said Zoro. He smirked when Sanji strained to hear him. "Should've used the gum."

"Shut up," Sanji snapped.

"You wanna get the baggage?"

"Yeah sure, whatever."

When the two of them got to the moving carousel of baggage, Zoro immediately blanked. "I forgot what the luaugge looks like."

"It's not that hard, ahou," Sanji said, rolling his eyes.

"I haven't seen it in twelve hours," Zoro defended himself. "If you're so smart, why don't you find it?"

"Maybe I will."

"Have fun with that."

Zoro took a seat on the side of the conveyor belt thingy— he really needed to learn its name— and watched as Sanji ran from each side of the machine, trying to find their luggage.

There was a tap on his shoulder suddenly and Zoro looked up to see a woman wearing a large wool scarf. _"Excuse-moi, mais pouvez-vous bougez?"_ ("I'm sorry, but could you move?")

" _Ah, oui,_ " said Zoro. ("Ah, yes.") Quickly, the swordsman moved aside for the woman.

" _Vous n'êtes pas française, n'es ce pas?_ " ("You're not French, right?")

" _Non, suis japonais,_ " said Zoro. ("No, I'm Japanese.") " _Je suis ici avec … mon chum pour une vacance._ " ("I'm here with my … boyfriend, for a vacation.")

 _"Bonne vacance d'abord,"_ she said with a smile. ("Have a good vacation then.")

" _Merci_." ("Thank you.")

"Oi, Sanji!" Zoro yelled to the blond. "Do you have the bags yet?"

The woman rolled her eyes at Zoro's sudden switch in language. It was all in good humour though as she walked away with her luggage.

"Shut up Marimo, there's a lot of black bags!" said Sanji, rolling his eyes.

"Read the tags then, our names should be on it," said Zoro, rolling his eyes in turn. He found he did this much more since he had been with Sanji. He sighed and got up, walking over to the cook. Hauling a random bag off the conveyor belt, he read the tag. "Not ours," he said with a shrug.

"Hey! That oji-san has our bag, daddy!"

Shit. Did those people follow them? Zoro gritted his teeth and waited for the young girl to approach him, holding her father's hand tightly in her own. Did she really have to call him an old man though? He wasn't even in his thirties!

"You trying to steal my daughter's stuff?" demanded the father in a gruff voice.

"No sir," said Zoro quickly.

The man's eyes went up and down Zoro before frowning. "Why's your hair green?"

"Genetics," Zoro said as a weak reply.

When the father and daughter walked away, Zoro could hear Sanji snickering next to him. Oh he was just having tons of fun, wasn't he?

"Shut up," Zoro snapped.

He pulled another bag off the carousel. "This is your bag," he said. "It's got your weird-ass swirls on it." He handed it over to Sanji and waited for the next bag to approach them to check if it was his.

"Hey, where are we staying?" asked Sanji suddenly. "You never told me anything about lodging and that sort of thing."

"Did you really just call it lodging?" Zoro shook his head. "Never mind. We're staying at a hotel, _Hotel de la Tour Eiffel_ , it's near the Eiffel Tower." Zoro squinted. "That's my bag." He pulled it off and turned to Sanji. "We have to run."

"Why?"

"Getting a cab is never easy, no matter which country you're in," said Zoro. "Come on."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 2

 **Location: Hotel de la Tour Eiffel (in Paris)**

 **Time: 4:45 AM CETZ**

* * *

"What do you mean we've only got one bed?"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Idiot, we've been living in the same room for a while now, it's no big deal," Zoro said. "Come on, if it makes you feel comfortable, you're free to set up a pathetic pillow barrier." Zoro stretched. "Anyway, I'm tired. I'm going to take a shower and get to bed. Tomorrow we'll go sight-seeing and shit." Zoro grinned. "Wanna join me?"

Sanji stared at him. "W-what?"

"The shower," said Zoro. "Wanna come?"

"Only girls bathe together," Sanji said, spluttering. "It'd be weird for two guys to do it—"

"It's also kind of weird for two guys to have sex, or have green hair, or genetically fucked up eyebrows," Zoro pointed out.

"I thought you were tired."

"Never too tired for sex," Zoro said with a smirk. "Besides, I brought lube, we'll be fine."

Sanji shook his head. "No, I'm tired. I might just go to sleep right now." He paused for a moment. "By the way … what's a _nut de noise_?"

" _Nuit de noces_ ," Zoro corrected him. "It means wedding night. _Vacances de noces_ means honeymoon."

"Are you implying we're married?"

"I'm implying we're pretty devoted," Zoro said with a shrug. "Anyway, I'll join you later when I'm done my shower. Also, if you want you can try to find a Japanese program on the hotel TV, but I'm not guaranteeing anything."

Sanji rolled his eyes and threw a pillow at Zoro's back as he walked to the bathroom.

"Don't do that," said Zoro. "You'll need all the help you can get if you want that pillow barrier."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 2

 **Location: Hotel de la Tour Eiffel (in Paris)**

 **Time: 11:45 AM CETZ**

* * *

 _SPLASH!_

Zoro opened his eyes, soaked head to toe in water. He shook his head and frowned. "What the fuck?"

"I don't need to clean the sheets," said Sanji. "This way we'll be able to leave before one, hopefully."

"You're not jet-lagged? It's a big time difference," Zoro pointed out.

"Yeah well I want to go and look around. French cuisine in actual France …" He got that glassy look in his eyes he often got when he was talking about food.

Zoro smiled. "Well, I'm not getting out of bed yet."

"And why not?" demanded Sanji, putting his hands on his hips in a rather feminine way.

"I didn't get a good morning kiss."

"I'll give you a good morning kick if you don't get your ass out of bed," Sanji told him with a glare. "Now come on!" He pulled at Zoro's arm and Zoro pulled back, forcing Sanji onto the bed with him. "The sheets are all wet," Sanji said.

"Whose fault is that?" Zoro teased. "Come on, kiss me," he said softly, Sanji's lean body leaning over his, his beautiful blue eyes taking Zoro's breath away.

"Brush your teeth."

"What?"

"Morning breath," Sanji said. "It's not sexy."

Zoro sighed and stomped out of the bed and into the bathroom, furiously brushing his teeth, twice, making sure there could be complaints about his breath before dashing out of the bathroom again to see Sanji waiting for him, hands crossed. "Get dressed," ordered the blond.

Zoro obediently got dressed, shoving on his pants, hopping around the room forcing his socks on.

"Great. Now let's go."

"What?" demanded Zoro. "What about my kiss?"

Sanji sighed and kissed him chastely on the cheek. "Tada."

"Oh no, you don't get away with something like that!" said Zoro, pulling Sanji in for another kiss, a more forceful one.

He practically melted into Sanji, guiding him with a hand on his neck, angling his head. Sanji's lips were as soft and hypnotizing as they always were, but there was just something sweeter about kissing him in the city of love, with their curtains wide open letting the late morning sun pour in through the windows, the view of the Eiffel Tower through the window pane.

Dear God, Sanji had turned him into a complete sap.

Sanji parted from him, breathing harshly. "T-there," he said, trying to catch his breath. "Satisfied?"

"With you? Never," Zoro promised. "Come on, let's get some of that French cuisine you wanted."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 2

 **Location: Le Meurice (in Paris)**

 **Time: 1:55 PM CETZ**

* * *

"Holy shit this place is expensive," Zoro declared. "Okay you're picking the cheapest thing on here because I don't have enough euros for all of this," Zoro said, frowning at the menu.

Sanji smirked. "French I actually know," he said with a smile.

Zoro rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah, whatever. Just pick the cheapest thing on here, if this restaurant's really that big of a deal then it won't matter if it's cheap."

Sanji rolled his eyes in turn. "You're so cheap Marimo."

The waiter came over at that moment and smiled at the two of them, but his eyes lingered a moment longer, trying to take everything in. " _Bonjour, vous-avez commandé?_ " ("Hello, have you ordered?") Zoro wasn't sure if Sanji noticed it, but the waiter seemed a bit tense. Homophobes were horrible.

" _Non, pas encore._ " ("No, not yet.") Zoro looked at the menu. Holy shit these were high prices. " _Ça_ ," ("this") he pointed towards what looked like the cheapest thing on the menu. " _Nous allons avoir ça,_ " he said. ("We'll have this.")

"Thanks for ordering for me," Sanji said through gritted teeth as the waiter nodded and hurried off a bit too quickly. "What's his problem?"

"Homophobes," Zoro said with a shrug. "Ignore him."

And though he had said it, there was no denying that Sanji was tense throughout the rest of the meal.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 2

 **Location: Le Meurice (in Paris)**

 **Time: 3:00 PM CETZ**

* * *

" _L'addition s'il-vous plaît_ ," Zoro asked the waiter. ("Check, please.")

The waiter came over with the check in hand and looked at the two of them. " _Qui va payez?_ " ("Who will pay?")

" _Moi_." ("Me.")

"Wait," said Sanji, cutting in. "Are you paying? Cause I'm not letting you pay. This is like Valentine's all over again."

"Yes, except this time, I didn't screw up and choke on a tie and you're _not_ paying," Zoro said, rolling his eyes.

" _Est-qu'il y a un problem?_ " ("Is there a problem?")

" _Non, nous sommes perfect._ " ("No, we're perfect.")

"Stop speaking for me!" Sanji said frustrated.

"It's not like you know any French!" Zoro pointed out. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Look, now's not the time to get into a stupid fight, okay? Just relax and we'll just keep going, okay?"

"But—"

"But nothing Sanji," Zoro cut him off. "I don't have a lot of money but I want to spent it on you right now so just shut up and be flattered, okay?" he commanded. "Jesus, it's not that hard, is it?"

Zoro knew Sanji would never be selfish. He'd never ask for anything and yet all Zoro wanted to do was give him the things he wanted. Zoro loved that Sanji was stubborn, but for God's sake, sometimes he was just too stubborn for his own good.

Zoro payed the bill and they left the restaurant with Sanji muttered under his breath about a thousand different profanities about how life was unfair and it wasn't right to make Zoro pay the whole bill. Zoro happily ignored Sanji's protests.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 2

 **Location: A Street in Paris**

 **Time: 4:00 PM CETZ**

* * *

 _"Est-ce que tu les vois?"_ ("Do you see them?")

 _"Oui, c'est étrange, n'est pas?"_ ("Yes, it's strange, isn't it?")

" _Est-ce que c'est legal?"_ ("Is it legal?")

" _Oui, mais je penses qu'il devrait être un crime._ " ("Yeah, but I think it should be a crime.")

It wasn't as though they were deaf. Zoro could hear what they were saying and Sanji could too, whether or not he knew exactly what they were saying, the judgement in their tones spoke loud-enough to be heard through the language barrier.

Zoro knew the LGBT rights in France. They accepted homosexuality along with transgender rights, but of course, there were always the traditional, non-accepting population. France did go a long way to understand that homosexuality wasn't a crime against the Church or anything of the sort, but still, there were the orthodox people who were narrow minded.

Zoro gripped Sanji's hand a bit tighter in the streets, but he could see Sanji was even more tense.

"Zoro …" said Sanji in a quiet voice. "Is it strange?"

"Is what strange?"

Sanji took a deep breath and Zoro knew exactly what was coming, he just hoped Sanji wouldn't say it. Sanji closed his eyes and after a moment of pause, the word left his lips. "Us."

"No," Zoro said. "No, not at all." Dammit, what was he supposed to say? He knew that this wasn't the same problem he had with Usopp. This wasn't a matter of emasculating one of them, it was a matter of them as a whole, of how they were perceived by the public and how it looked in other people's eyes to see two men walking down the street hand in hand, leaning close to each other to whisper.

This wasn't a matter of who was more masculine, or who "bottomed" or "topped", this was about the relationship being homosexual and being judged by others eyes. This was about what the public thought of them, about whether or not it was normal to see two people of the same sex acting like a heterosexual couple. This was about whether or not what they were doing was wrong.

"But … The waiter and those people …"

"Look at me Sanji," Zoro said, stopping. He turned to the blond and held his shoulders with his hands. "Listen to me." His eyes connected with Sanji's and he watched the cook breathe, making sure it was even and controlled. "There are people who think things like us are unnatural, I can admit that. But come on, we're used to it, aren't we? Green hair, screwed up eyebrows, we're monsters, remember?" The way he said it, the words he used, though he said the word "monster" it sounded more like a joke, more like a term of endearment, as though being a monster was like being part of a special club that only some people had access too, it was something special.

"But Zoro—"

" _Je t'aime,"_ Zoro said softly, pressing his forehead against Sanji's. " _Je t'aime. Je t'aime tellement_. Aishiteru. I don't care how many times I need to tell you this until you believe me. I don't know how many times it'll take for me to convince you _tu es beau_. You're beautiful. I don't know what it'll take, but I'm willing to do anything to convince you. Sanji, do you remember that list?"

Sanji nodded slowly.

"Fifteen," Zoro said. "Tell me number fifteen."

"My eyes," Sanji said softly.

"Yes, I love your eyes," Zoro told him in an even quieter voice. "And I don't want to see them cloud with doubt the way they are now, do you understand me?" Zoro asked him. "Your eyes are beautiful when you're sad, but you're absolutely breath-taking when they light up. I don't ever want to see you that way, not when I know I can stop it."

Sanji rolled his eyes and turned his head away, but Zoro held onto his chin, forcing him to look at him. "We're in public, ahou."

"So?"

And Zoro kissed him.

It wasn't heavy, or harsh. It was gentle and sweet, hesitant. Sanji could pull away if he wanted to at any moment. Zoro's body leaned forward, almost sheltering him from prying eyes as he kissed him. Though it was soft and sweet, it was filled with passion. There was an unspoken promise in this kiss.

"I'll never give you a reason to doubt me, never."

When they pulled away, the message had been received.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 3

 **Location: Louvre**

 **Time: 1:00 PM CETZ**

* * *

Getting lost in the Louvre wasn't what Zoro had planned for them, but of course, it happened anyway.

"How did you lose the tour guide?" demanded Sanji.

"I was just looking at that fucked up artist—"

"It was Picasso and he isn't fucked up!"

"Then explain to me why the hell his art looks so screwed up!" Zoro shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair. "Never mind that, just … argh, I can't believe we're lost!"

"It was bound to happen with you in France and all," said Sanji, rolling his eyes. "We all know you have no sense of direction."

"You can shut up," Zoro huffed, crossing his arms. He looked left, right and then forward. "This way," he decided, turning sharply to the left.

"Wait! They say when you get lost the best thing to do is stay where you are," said Sanji but Zoro didn't listen and instead the blond had to follow him so that at the very least, they were lost together.

"Okay wait, we saw the Mona Lisa already, so we've been here before," declared Zoro. He squinted. "I think the picture's no good, it's all foggy."

"It's an art style," said Sanji, rolling his eyes.

"You know, I hear they say that she's a man, or something like that. There's a whole book about it," Zoro said to himself more than to anyone else.

"Whatever, you're weird."

"Said by the man with screwed up eyebrows."

"You have no room to talk, your hair's green and it's _natural_!"

Zoro grumbled under his breath something about weird screwed up genetics before turning another corner. "That's uh …" He tilted his head to the side. "Have I seen this before?"

"Starry Night? That's Van Gough, it's pretty popular, you might've seen it online or something."

"Why do you know so much about art?"

"Why do you know so little and yet went to an art museum?" Sanji shook his head. "Starry Night is just basic knowledge anyway."

Zoro leaned against the wall and sighed. "How about we play a game?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "What game? We're lost, how about we find our way back to the tour-guide?"

"It's not like you understood half of what she said anyway," Zoro said, rolling his eyes.

"I did too!" Sanji said, blushing. It was clear he didn't but Zoro decided to have a little fun.

"Okay. _J'aime les peintures._ What did I say?"

Sanji frowned for a moment. "Gem? No wait, _j'aime_ …" He shook his head before snapping his fingers. "You love painting!"

"Wrong. I said I like paintings, not painting, but paintings."

Sanji nodded. "Yeah you'd look weird if you were wearing paint-splattered clothes. But wait … You said _je t'aime_ means I love you, so then how come you meant like?"

"Unlike Japanese, there's no difference between like and love," Zoro said. " _Aimer_ , it's a verb which means either to like, or love. Depending on the context, you can interpret it in different ways." Zoro frowned for a moment. "Okay, think of it like this. Suki and daisuki they both mean like, right? Suki being the verb like, but aishiteru means love, right? _Aimer_ is like aishiteru and suki, depending on context, you'll know which term you say. Except the problem is when you say you like someone and then they might think it means you love them … I've had a couple of problems with that …"

Sanji nodded slowly. "Okay, I get it. So … if I said _je t'aime,_ I could either be saying aishiteru, or daisuki."

"Yeah, basically," Zoro said with a shrug.

"Okay then … Dakara … _je t'aime._ "

Zoro stared at him. "Wait, did you mean—"

"You'll never know Marimo," Sanji teased with a grin.

Goddammit, this man would be the death of him.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 3

 **Location: Louvre**

 **Time: 2:45 PM CETZ**

* * *

"It's been almost two hours," declared Sanji. "They still haven't found us. What are we supposed to do now?"

"Count tiles on the ceiling?" Zoro suggested.

"Zoro."

"We could make out …" Seeing the look on Sanji's face he rolled his eyes. "Never mind that then. Where are we now?"

"Abstract art section," declared Sanji.

"How the fuck does that painting have such high worth? It looks like someone puked colours on it."

"It's abstract," Sanji said, rolling his eyes. "It's supposed to be a bit crazy."

"Like Picasso?"

"Yeah," Sanji said, pulling his knees into himself as he sat with his back against the wall. "I guess you could call it that."

"Hey Sanji?"

"Hmm-ph!"

Zoro had quickly leaned over and placed his mouth over Sanji's, holding his chin in his hands. His neck was at a weird position, but hearing Sanji speak French, or about art, or just hearing Sanji's voice, gave him quite a few problems down below. He needed to quench his thirst at least a little bit.

"Z-Zoro!" Sanji said, pushing against Zoro's chest lightly. "We're in a museum!"

Zoro moved from Sanji's lips to his neck, burying his head in Sanji's neck. "So? No one's around."

"The paintings are watching," Sanji hissed.

"Better put on a show then," Zoro chuckled, biting down on Sanji's collar bone lightly. The blond jerked upwards and let out a moan. He was biting his lip trying to hold it in. How cute. Zoro wouldn't let him. The gallery echoed, this could be fun.

"S-stop it …"

"You don't want to be heard, do you?" Zoro asked. He pulled down the side of Sanji's shirt and bit the junction between his neck and shoulder harshly.

"Haa!" Sanji screamed, covering his mouth but the sound already echoed through the gallery.

"Wouldn't want to be heard, now would you?" Zoro teased.

"B-basta— oh, shit …" Sanji's head went back and he closed his eyes, letting himself feel Zoro, becoming acutely aware of the green-haired swordsman whose lips were currently attached to his neck.

In the city of love, in one of the most famous museums in the world, in the abstract art section on the floor, kissing his lover's neck while trying desperately not to lose so much control that he ripped his clothes off right then and there, Zoro found he now had a bigger problem than when he first started.

Zoro pulled off of him, breathing harshly. He clenched his fists as his side, trying to keep a cool head. This so wasn't working. Maybe this hadn't been the greatest idea he had ever had.

Sanji leaned over him this time, looking at Zoro's flushed cheeks. "Got a problem, Marimo?"

" _Connard_ ," Zoro muttered. ("Bastard.")

"Did you just call me a duck?" (duck is " _canard_ ") Sanji shook his head and grinned. "Never mind, want a little help?"

Zoro's eyes widened.

Was this really happening to him? It couldn't be, no that'd be ridiculous. Sanji wasn't about to suck him off in the middle of the gallery of an art museum, no that'd be ridiculous.

"M-maybe …" Zoro was pretty sure his face had never been more red.

Sanji nodded and he leaned down, kissing Zoro softly.

Zoro let himself submit to Sanji's kisses, feeling his head go light-headed. His hands snaked around Sanji's neck, pulling him closer. Sanji's hands moved to Zoro's chest, under his shirt, across his torso. Zoro's breath hitched. He couldn't breathe, he felt as though he was going to die from lack of oxygen and he didn't find he minded all that much.

"Shit … Sanji," he gasped as the blond's hand move lower.

 _Holy shit, is he …?_

Sanji's hand moved to Zoro's crotch and holy fuck, he was actually starting to jack him off.

Zoro found himself arching into Sanji's touch, his breathing laboured. "Ngh …" He gripped Sanji's shoulders, trying to steady himself. He felt like he could pass out at any moment.

"Is it good?" asked Sanji in that sweet, innocent tone of his.

"Too good," Zoro gasped. "I'm pent up, if you don't stop I might … Shit …" He was so close, Sanji had to know that, the way he tensing, the way he was practically turning into a puddle.

The cook kissed him, his hand slowing down. Zoro bucked his hips, wanting more friction as Sanji slowly kissed him in a way that could only be called blissful torment.

Sanji's hand pulled away just when Zoro was going to cum, leaving him high and dry.

"Fucking tease," Zoro said through clenched teeth but he was smiling.

 _"Ils sont ici!"_ ("They're over here!")

Sanji scrambled off of Zoro and stood up, acting overly proper when the tour-guide and the tourists rounded the corner. _"Je suis désolé que vous étiez perdu,_ " she said. ("I'm sorry you were lost") " _C'était ma faute_." ("It was my fault.")

 _"C'est pas un problem,_ " Zoro said. ("It's not a problem.") He shrugged, playing it off while hoping no one could tell his state of arousal. " _Nous ne sommes pas blessé, donc vous avez rien de sentir mal de_." ("We're not hurt, so you have nothing to be sorry for.")

Of course, they weren't hurt. Nothing really hurt. Except his balls.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 4

 **Location: A Street in Paris**

 **Time: 10:25 AM CETZ**

* * *

"I think it's a miracle, we're up so early and about," declared Sanji with a grin. "Look at that, we have a while to go before lunch and we're already outside!"

"Hey Sanji," said Zoro slowly, an idea hitting him. "Remember when I told you about savate? I said it was a form of French kick-boxing, fought in the streets." He grinned. "Wanna fight in the streets of France?"

Sanji stared at him. "W-what?"

"Come on, hit me with your best shot."

Sanji gaped. "B-but—"

"But nothing, come on, I know marital arts, I can hold my own without swords. Let's see how your kick's doing. Are you getting rusty?"

"Bastard!"

 _SWOOSH!_

Sanji's leg came around to hit Zoro but missed him. Zoro had dodged out of the way quickly and grinned. "Losing your touch, eh cook?"

"You can shut up, Marimo!" Sanji said, aiming another kick at Zoro, this time aiming for Zoro's abdomen. Jumping back quickly, Zoro avoided the hit. "You're not doing much better, just dodging. What's that going to do for you?"

"Give me something I can work with then, cook!"

 _SLAM!_

Sanji's foot hit the pavement harshly as tried to trip Zoro, but Zoro grabbed his foot as it was in the air. "Asshole," Sanji said through gritted teeth.

Zoro pushed back at Sanji's foot, bringing the cook off-balance. Sanji wavered for a moment before collecting himself again. Zoro went to strike a punch but Sanji delivered a blow to Zoro's elbow. There was a cracking noise, as though it was dislocated.

"Oh shit, did I hurt you?"

Zoro smirked and rolled back his shoulder, the joint relocating itself back in place. "You think you can hurt me, eh, Curly Bow? Think again."

Sanji flung himself onto the cobblestone streets, lifting his legs and swinging them around to do a round-house kick. Zoro flipped over him and went to kick at his arms to bring Sanji to the ground but the cook jumped back quickly.

At this point, others had began to take notice of their little fight.

Street performers on the streets of Paris were not unusual, not in the very least but with the fire and passion the two were putting into the fight, some were uncertain whether it was really a fight for show or if they were serious.

" _Comment se battre cet homme là?_ " ("How's that man fighting?") asked a woman in a hushed voice.

" _C'est savate, je pense,_ " ("It's savate, I think.") replied the man next to her.

" _Il regarde française,_ " ("He looks French,") admitted the woman.

" _Mais l'autre, il est japonais_ ," ("But the other one looks Japanese,") said the man.

 _"Une minute, ça … c'est pas le savate."_ ("Wait a minute, that … that's not savate.")

 _"Vous-avez raison, mais ça regarde presque la même."_ ("You're right, but it looks almost the same.")

 _"Qui sont ils?"_ ("Who are they?")

Zoro didn't pay attention to their voices and instead made an attack at Sanji's head with a well-aimed punch. Rather than hitting him though, he got the very end of his shoulder-blade. With his effort he teetered forward in surprise and was caught off guard.

Sanji managed to get a nice kick to Zoro's jaw.

The swordsman staggered back. He felt safer when he had his swords on him, but clearly he couldn't have them on him now. He made an attempt at a kick at Sanji, but it was pointless to try and kick someone who's main expertise was in kicking.

 _CLASH!_

Zoro's foot connected with Sanji's and they both stood with one foot in the air, trying to block the other. Sanji twisted his body and Zoro lost balance, falling on the ground, his head barely missing contact with the concrete.

" _Il n'utilize pas ses mains!_ " ("He doesn't use his hands!")

 _"Papa, montré moi comment faire ça!"_ ("Daddy, show me how to do that!")

Zoro grinned, sitting up straight and laughing. "Good fight?" he asked with a grin.

Sanji nodded, helping him up onto his feet. "Warmed up yet?"

"I'm awake," Zoro said with a grin. "You?"

"Never been more alive."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 4

 **Location: Hotel de la Tour Eiffel (in Paris)**

 **Time: 9:43 PM CETZ**

* * *

"AH!"

Zoro immediately ran out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped poorly around his waist to see Sanji standing on the bed, shoes and all, looking like he was shaking. Zoro looked around for the pest, but found nothing.

"What the fuck are you doing?" demanded Zoro, raising an eyebrow at him.

"S-s-s …"

"S-s-s?" Zoro repeated. "What are you saying? I need you to talk to me, properly."

Sanji was breathing harshly and his face was paling. It was clear he was about to have a panic attack. There was no smoke in the room, he wasn't doing anything strenuous, so what was the source of his panic? Zoro looked around the room frantically. He couldn't calm Sanji down properly until the threat was gone.

Zoro grabbed Wado from the closet and raised it above his head. "Where is it?" he asked. "What's scaring you?"

Sanji pointed, his throat seeming to be unable to work.

Zoro stared, squinting.

There was a spider. It wasn't a Daddy Long Legs, nothing poisonous, at least, not as far as Zoro knew, and it wasn't a tarantula, but clearly it was scaring the crap out of Sanji. With the hilt of his sword, Zoro crushed the insect in one swift move before moving onto the bed.

He slowly lowered Sanji from his standing position so that they were sitting on the bed and turned to him. "Sanji, it's gone," he said in a calm voice. Sanji's quickened breathing was freaking him out, but he had to stay calm or else things would get bad. "Listen to my voice Sanji, okay? You have your inhaler? Where is it?"

Sanji pointed to the drawer in the bed-side table.

Zoro opened it and tried his best not to look like he was rushing or panicking. Taking it out, he handed it to Sanji. "You know how to use it?"

Sanji nodded.

The blond took the inhaler out and placed it in between his lips, breathing in deeply. One of his hands gripped Zoro tightly and Zoro let him, despite the fact that his knuckles were turning white and his hand felt numb.

He didn't know what he could say to Sanji so instead he said nothing and opted to stay silent, rubbing his back in slow, circle motions.

It took a while but Sanji let go of his inhaler and his killer grip on Zoro loosened.

"Better?"

"Yeah," said Sanji in a quiet voice. He turned his head away from Zoro. "I … You can laugh at me, if you want."

Zoro shook his head. "So you're scared of spiders, big deal, it's a pretty common thing."

"It's not just spiders," Sanji admitted. "It's just … I don't like bugs. At all. They're disgusting and just … I don't know, they disgust me." He shivered at the thought. "I know it's stupid."

"If you think it's a logical fear, then it's logical. It could be worse, you could have the fear of laughter, that would be a pretty sad life," Zoro joked softly.

"But you … You don't seem like you're scared of anything."

Zoro shook his head. "No, I'm scared of tons of things," he said. "I'm not too fond of asking for help or anything like that, I like to think I'm independent—"

"But that's not a fear, that's a way of liking things, that's a matter of pride," Sanji pointed out.

"I'm scared … I'm scared of being alone," Zoro said softly. "I'm scared all my friends are an illusion, something I've created so that I'm not in complete isolation. I'll be left alone, that the people I love will leave me, that they'll be better off without me …" He bit his bottom lip. He didn't like talking about these things. "I'm scared of losing control, of letting myself be because if I do, people might leave me. I fear waking up alone and finding out everything's been a dream … I'm scared … I'm scared of not being able to do anything, of not being able to save the ones I love, I'm scared … I'm scared I can't protect others, like I couldn't protect her … I'm scared I won't get to tell everyone everything I want before I don't have the chance anymore. I'm scared … I'm scared of missed opportunities, that I won't see the problem before it's too late …"

Zoro took a moment to breathe and gave Sanji a smile. It was forced. "See? I get scared sometimes too."

Sanji stared at him, unable to speak.

Zoro closed his eyes, waiting for Sanji to call him weak or pathetic, to leave him. He knew deep down he'd let him go, just so he could be happy elsewhere but dear God would it kill him.

"Zoro …" His voice was so soft, so sweet. Zoro memorized each syllable, the way he said his name, making sure he'd never forget it. "I want to do it."

Zoro's eyes opened in surprise. "What?"

"I want you to make love to me." Sanji took a deep breath. "I want you to be on top."

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _Raigon : Well I find that in comparison to other stories, the speed that Zoro and Sanji's relationship is developing at is better than most, but yeah, I guess you could say it's like that. I don't know, I really wanted to bring up LGBT rights in Japan so I brought up gay marriage._

 _to answer setkia's poll: Busier? Dear God, I don't know how to respond to that. I guess it might be because what's going on in Sanji's head is so much more than Zoro since Zoro's main focus is Sanji and Sanji's dealing with his whole past more than Zoro is._

 _Shizuka Taiyou : Half of the conversations they have are either based off ones I've had with my friends, or conversations I want to have or I feel I need them to have in order to make fangirls heads explode. Yup, that's my conversation criteria. Was it you who said Sanji should have an attack caused by a bug? Well, it's in here now._

 _crystalbluefox : Okay so here's the thing: I tend to obsess over characters, a lot. And it's almost never the main character. You know the **Hunger Games**? Peeta, totally obsessed with him. I don't know, I think it's the main male character, or a male character I think who doesn't get enough light and then tada, I'm obsessed with them so trust me, I know what you mean when you say you like the character who isn't the main one. That's a pretty good point with the whole sharing thing, and interesting quote to share. You have no idea how happy it makes me to know that you really like this story! I'm literally (well no, not literally) exploding with happiness right now. And I read the chapter 14 before the revision cause I read your story, skipped the empty chapter, which made me feel incredibly bad but kept going. I was wondering if I could help you a bit in some revisions, I noticed a few mistakes you make and I realize as your kouhai, that sounds like a stupid request, but I really would like to help you fix up some grammar things and occasional problems. Your main problem is the occasional tense switching thing. Sorry if I'm over-stepping boundaries mentioning this, it's just cause I really love your work! Also, I used your idea,sort of, of Sanji trying smoking again. Well, it was more that man smoking his pipe, just getting Sanji near nicotine again and realizing the affects it has on him._

 _I'mSecretlyANinjaTimeLord (x2): I am so glad! And I totally forgot that about leprechauns ... Whoops._

 _Ringochan94 : So uh yeah, I had fun with this chapter as well and Kuina had a few different past stories as her background, one involving Zoro and his scar from Mihawk being because he fought Mihawk and couldn't win and he got hurt trying to help Kuina and then she got killed, but yeah, I like this idea better that I used._

 _Kiera jones: Um ..._

 _Nachtwolke : I do like **Kenshin** , so yeah, you should check it out. As for the math textbooks, it's breaking my back bringing them to school ..._

 _lilcutieprincess : Interesting idea ..._

 _Random Person: are you also the one who answered my poll?_

 _Okay so the age thing ... Dear God I don't want to say it. Mainly because I feel like I'll disappoint you all. It's complicated. Okay, let's see ... how can I answer this? I live in Canada, in Canada, you become legal to drink at age 18. I am not at that age yet. I'm in high school, which puts my age from 12 to 18, but I just said I'm below the age of drinking. I think that's all I'll tell you because I think your respect (if you have any) for me will decrease if I tell you my age ..._

 _Okay question: **So, Sanji decided to ask Zoro about doing it! Do you think he's going too fast to let Zoro have him? How do you think Zoro'll do it? I'm just curious about your predictions.**_


	40. Force of Nature

_**Author's Note:** Okay so here we go, this chapter was like, oh dear God, I imagined it so many ways and none of them involved this. The ending's weird, I will admit it, but yeah, you're going to have to deal with my weirdness. Has anyone read **Lord of the Flies?** I'm feeling sick reading it, seriously, I nearly puked when I read chapter 9 in class. And then my teacher said there was a metaphor for a gangbang when these boys killed a pig ... Anyway, that horrible image out of my mind, my friend also introduced me to Dan and Phil on YouTube! I've found a British boy I wouldn't mind marrying. I like Phil and Dan, but I kinda like Dan just a tad better. Dan just reminds me of a character I created, the awkwardness and genuine klutzy weird awkward moments are totally tangible. Apparently he got kicked out a mall for being too weird. So I worked really hard on this chapter, but the ending kind of sucks. Would you believe me if I said we've got two more chapters and then it's over? And then I gotta figure out which story I'm writing! Oh God! So if you could please answer my poll if you haven't about which **One Piece** story I should write next, it'd be really appreciated. One last thing about **Lord of the Flies** though, for some reason, I absolutely adore Jack. Well, I think he's awful but he's an amazing character, very intriguing and leaving me interested and just a tad- okay, **very** disturbed. I don't own **One Piece!** Also sorry, there's no separator of smut cause I don't even know where to put it. THIS WHOLE CHAPTER IS NOT SEX THOUGH!_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER, the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Sex (Zoro's on top, for the first time ever!)**

 **Mentions of other things I can't remember.**

* * *

Chapter 40: Force of Nature

 _I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows  
_ _Oh but it's too late now  
_ _I let you get too close  
_ _I know I should take cover, hide inside these four walls  
_ _But baby I surrender, it all_

 _-_ Bea Miller, _Force of Nature_

* * *

 _"Zoro …" His voice was so soft, so sweet. Zoro memorized each syllable, the way he said his name, making sure he'd never forget it. "I want to do it."_

 _Zoro's eyes opened in surprise. "What?"_

 _"I want you to make love to me." Sanji took a deep breath. "I want you to be on top."_

* * *

Almost like the first time Sanji had told Zoro he wanted to do it, the silence was unbearable. If Zoro went off saying he was hallucinating again like he had when Sanji had first told him he wanted to do it, or when he had first told him he loved him, Sanji would be ready to scream. The swordsman seemed to have trouble accepting reality the way it was. As much as Sanji knew he had been through hell, he knew Zoro had been through some rough stuff as well and perhaps it was what had happened with Kuina that had him so screwed up at the moment.

"I … I …"

"If you say you're dreaming or I'm crazy or you're crazy or some kind of crazy shit like that, I'm taking it back," Sanji declared. He bit his bottom lip, already feeling himself become nervous. He had already thought about it, about whether or not he wanted to do something this extreme with Zoro and the answer he had come up with was yes. Dear God, yes, he wanted to and it scared him. But Zoro … Zoro wouldn't hurt him, would he?

"I …"

"If you say 'I' one more time I'm pulling out your tongue," Sanji added.

Zoro shut his mouth abruptly and merely stared at him.

Sanji wasn't sure if Zoro knew how uneasy he was making him with his gaze. It made his stomach churn as he thought about it, wondering where he went wrong, if he shouldn't have said it, if he had picked the wrong moment, if Zoro would think it was something that was happening only in the moment. He closed his eyes tightly and took a deep breath.

"Don't say anything yet. Let me talk." Sanji waited a moment, partially to make sure Zoro wouldn't speak and partially to gather all his thoughts. Once both were under control, he began. "I'm not asking you for this because I think I need to say it. I'm not saying it because of the moment, I've been thinking about it recently, I really have. I don't think if I don't ask you to be on top you'll dump me or anything. Let me just get that out of the way before you start coming up with some crazy assumption, but I know you've probably already done it anyway. I … I've told you this before, but Un. _Je t'aime_ , whatever language you want me to say it in, I'll say it. I'm not asking you to do this to prove that I love you or anything either, it's more like … Fuck it's complicated. I just … I want you. I want you and I'm ready, I'm ready to do it this way."

Zoro stared at him unblinkingly as the silence enveloped the two of them.

Sanji fiddled with his hands, feeling anxiety rise in his stomach. His eyes flittered around the room, looking everywhere but at Zoro and that place that dead spider was probably. "Um … we don't have to do it now or anything—"

"You call the shots."

Sanji's breath hitched and he looked up at Zoro who was staring at him with a look of complete concentration in his eyes. "What?"

"You call the shots, you always have," Zoro said. "You've always been in control and if we do this now, it won't be any different. If we start off one way and you decide you want to back out at the last moment, that's okay, you can tell me and we'll do it differently."

Sanji nodded, swallowing a lump in his throat. "Okay."

Zoro nodded and they fell into silence.

Sanji's eyes finally left Zoro's and instead stared at his chest, looking at the scars, that large one that went across his chest, droplets of water from his shower sneaking in through the crevices. He watched the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed in slowly, calmly as Sanji's heart felt like it was about to leap out of his chest. He leaned closer on the bed and it shifted slightly under his weight. He raised a hand to Zoro's chest and slowly let his fingers run over every scar, memorizing it.

It felt like something new entirely, almost everything they did together felt like a first. Zoro put his chin in his hand and pulled him up for a soft kiss, letting Sanji melt into it, feeling the warmth of Zoro's skin on his.

Zoro pressed a little harder against his lips and Sanji let himself fall back onto the bed, feeling the slightest bit of anxiety rise in his stomach as the swordsman's tongue swept over his lips sweetly, agonizingly slowly. With a sudden intake of breath, Zoro's tongue entered Sanji's mouth and the blond felt the world fade around him.

He became aware of everything that surrounded him and all that surrounded him was Zoro. He could feel the man's hand on his hip, squeezing lightly to keep him in place, but it wasn't a hold Sanji couldn't break if he wanted to. He felt Zoro's other hand move from his chin to his neck, holding the base of his skull, letting his fingers play with the hairs on the nape of his neck. Zoro's chest was against Sanji's, his dress-shirt becoming a bit damp from Zoro's freshly cleaned body, but he didn't care. One of his hands snaked around to wrap around Zoro's back, pressing him just slightly closer while his other one went into Zoro's spiky hair, musing it.

The smell of steel and mint devoured his senses as he held his breath. Zoro moved from his lips to his neck, gently kissing the column of his neck. The hand on Sanji's hip slowly moved to the front of Sanji's stomach. He played with the hem of Sanji's shirt, but he didn't pull, he didn't push. Instead, he let his hand slide over his stomach over the thin material of cotton. Sanji took a sudden intake of breath, feeling nervous. The room was properly lit and though they had done this before, he felt as though he was more exposed than ever. When he tensed, Zoro's hand moved away.

He could hear Zoro's earrings chime as he moved from his neck back up to his face, to his ear, licking the shell of his ear. Sanji felt Zoro's hand move from the front of his stomach to his hip again. There was no frustration, he wasn't annoyed that Sanji still felt insecure, he didn't care. Zoro blew lightly on his ear, making Sanji shiver. He closed his eyes and let himself relax, let himself come undone as Zoro's hand on his hip went to his back, gently rubbing his back.

Sanji opened his eyes slightly, heavy-lidded as he stared at Zoro. "You … you can touch me," he said softly.

Zoro's eyes widened a fraction before he kissed Sanji, devouring him in a soft kiss that was too sweet for Sanji to handle. It was though he was killing him softly. Zoro didn't touch him though, not skin to skin. Rather, he let his hand move over the top of Sanji's dress-shirt. He felt his chest through thin material slowly. When he detached himself from Sanji's lips, he moved down to his neck, his shoulder blades. He moved farther down and still, he wouldn't touch Sanji directly. Sanji wondered if Zoro was trying to kill him on purpose.

Zoro let go of Sanji, putting his hands instead on either side of Sanji's body, not near his head, not so he felt caged, but enough so that he knew Zoro was there. As though he could ever forget. He leaned down and licked at Sanji's neck, moving farther down. He kissed Sanji through the thin material of his clothes, his tongue dampening the cotton.

Zoro's lips brushed over Sanji's nipple and the man's back arched suddenly. It almost tickled, the lightest touch. It sent nerves throughout his whole body. He didn't know what to call it, but he knew that he wanted Zoro to touch him with his hands on his own skin. He made a move to lift his shirt himself, but Zoro stopped him.

"Don't rush," said the swordsman in a soft voice.

He let his tongue swirl around Sanji's nipple, the heat of his tongue mixed with the cool of the material, the dampness made the shirt stick ever so slightly before lifting again. Sanji's hands fisted at his sides as his eyes slid close, melting in Zoro's warmth.

"Z-Zoro …" Sanji felt his hips buck upwards as Zoro's mouth suckled on the skin of his chest. He was fed up with his shirt suddenly, he hated it, it was horrible, it was a distraction, it was ruining this overwhelming feeling he was getting. Zoro's fingers finally moved to the buttons of Sanji's shirt, but it wasn't what he expected.

Zoro always struck Sanji as a passionate lover, someone who got caught up in the heat of the moment, the one who would rip your clothes off with no mercy and take you until you forgot your own name. Instead, the swordsman slowly unbuttoned his buttons and Sanji could feel his hands trembling as he did it.

Zoro leaned over and captured Sanji's lips in a kiss as his fingers trembled. As each button came undone, he somehow managed to never touch Sanji's skin for more than a moment before moving to the next one. When the cool air around him hit his bare skin, Sanji let out a gasp. Zoro was about to pull away from him, but he gripped his hair and pulled him in for harder kiss.

Zoro let him take control as Sanji kissed him with an unbridled passion, a hand on Zoro's chest, not to push him away but to feel his heartbeat, erratic and frantic, matching his own racing pulse, to feel his warmth underneath his fingertips.

Zoro kissed him back, taking his time as Sanji held onto his shoulder with one hand tightly, sure his nails were digging into his skin. He could feel himself on edge. There was just something about the way Zoro was going about this, as though he had all the time in the world, that made Sanji's heart beat all the more faster.

Sanji though felt he was going to die if he didn't feel Zoro's touch. Taking Zoro's hand in his own, he pressed it against his own chest and watched through half-lidded eyes as Zoro let his hand rest where Sanji had put it, looking at him as though to ask for permission. Sanji guided Zoro's hand slowly across his chest, his breath hitching as his thumb brushed over his nipple.

Sensitive, he remembered Zoro saying he liked that about him.

Slowly Zoro's hands moved across Sanji's chest, his fingers tracing every curve and dip, as though memorizing it, as though when it was all over, he could make a perfect sculpture of him. Suddenly, he could feel the lightest brush of Zoro's lips on him, finding that the swordsman was currently spreading kisses across his chest. He went farther down, letting his hands follow him, holding the frame of Sanji's body with rough hands, but his touch was so gentle. His tongue dipped into Sanji's navel and the cook let out a soft moan.

Zoro's fingers moved to Sanji's pants, fiddling with the button. He looked up at him as though asking for permission once again. Sanji nodded slowly and Zoro's fingers shook as he slowly popped the top button. The sound of Sanji's zipper undoing echoed through the room.

Zoro moved back up to kiss him though, allowing his body to almost lay on top of him and it was at that moment that Sanji realized that Zoro was wearing a towel. He could feel him rubbing against him. "Hah …" He panted, pulling at Zoro's neck to kiss him, to have him closer.

"S-Sanji," gasped Zoro. "You're killing me."

Sanji kissed him softly, short and sweet, letting go of him as Zoro's eyes glazed over with desire. Those hazel eyes that drove him absolutely insane were looking at him with so much want, it was obvious.

Sanji's breath hitched as Zoro moved lower and slowly started to slip Sanji's pants down. He almost didn't mind the cold that reached his legs, making him shiver. It could've just been the way Zoro's hands touched him though, the feel of his warmth a sudden contrast to the cold air. Zoro gently rubbed his thighs and if foreplay could kill a man, it was surely what was happening now.

Zoro slowly pulled at Sanji's boxers and Sanji felt exposed. He turned his head away but Zoro softly touched his cheek making him turn to him.

"Remember, you're in control," Zoro reminded him softly. "If you want me to stop, tell me and I will."

"If you stop now, I'm fucking killing you," Sanji promised.

Zoro's lips quirked into a smile. "You say the sweetest things."

Zoro's hand wrapped around him and began stroking him slowly, achingly slowly. His warm touch heated Sanji to his core and he felt like he was melting. Sanji's breathing was coming out just a tad faster, just a little too rushed, his heart pounding a million miles per minute.

Zoro leaned down and took Sanji into his mouth, sucking on him softly. His tongue licked around the head and then he sucked in deeply, his cheeks hollowing. Sanji's intake of breath became rushed and his hands fisted the sheets. Instead of taking him all in one go as Zoro tended to do, he went slowly, first playing with the head, teasing it with his tongue. Zoro's hand wrapped around his base and pulled gently before taking a bit more of him.

"Z-Zoro," Sanji gasped, unable to breathe. Zoro was going so softly, so slowly, it was driving him insane. He felt so good and yet just when he felt close, Zoro would ease up on him. Zoro massaged his balls with one of his hands as he took more of Sanji into his mouth, his thumb just barely brushing over his hole.

"P-put it in," said Sanji, trying to hide the blush on his cheeks, but it was pointless.

Zoro shook his head. Instead, he took himself off of Sanji and got up to get the lube. "You're too tense, it won't work unless you loosen up." The way his hips swayed and the towel slowly seemed to slip farther down his waist was criminal.

Zoro came back with a bottle of lube. "Do you want me to, or do you?"

Sanji bit his lip. "You can do it," he said so softly, Zoro almost didn't hear him.

Zoro nodded, but instead of uncapping the lube, he instead leaned his head down and pressed his lips against Sanji's hole.

Sanji sucked in a breath of surprise. "A-ahou, what are you doing?" he demanded, feeling Zoro's hot tongue on him somewhere no one had ever touched like that before. "T-that's … isn't it disgusting?"

Zoro didn't answer him. Instead, he ran his tongue over Sanji's hole before pointing his tongue and trying to probe it in. It was getting slick with saliva as Zoro gently help Sanji's hips. His tongue made its way in slowly and the moment it was inside of him, Sanji moaned, his head falling back.

"Shit, what are you doing?" he hissed, feeling himself come undone.

Zoro pulled his tongue out and began to rub around the wet area carefully, his tongue sticking out slightly in concentration. He licked it again, slow and deliberately, brushing Sanji's balls as he went. He didn't seem to be complaining about doing this, much to Sanji's surprise.

Sanji's hands wove through Zoro's hair, feeling the spiky and yet soft texture between his fingers. The more he did it, slowly, lovingly, the more Zoro seemed to press. His tongue made its way in again and Sanji could feel Zoro licking the inside of him. Rather than feel disgust, he felt … He couldn't describe it, it was something different, something unusual and yet … It felt so good …

He clenched tightly and Zoro pulled out again, this time to put lube on his fingers.

With the mixture of lube and saliva, as he pushed in the first finger it didn't hurt as much as Sanji had thought it would. His hands were gentle as he slowly pushed in his finger, watching Sanji for each reaction he made, making sure he wasn't pushing too far or anything like that. It was slow, the first knuckle entering him, Sanji could've sworn he heard Zoro groan in reaction to it.

"Are you okay?" Zoro asked him softly.

"Y-yeah," Sanji gasped. It felt strange, to have something inside of him. It had been a long time but he found that this was nothing like it had been before. He didn't hate this, in fact, it made him harder, knowing it was Zoro, seeing the worried crease in Zoro's brow as he slowly pushed in further. It was so different doing it with Zoro. Doing it with someone you loved.

Zoro nodded. It was up to his third knuckle now.

Sanji let out a gasp, feeling full already from his fingers, he wondered what it would be like when Zoro got inside of him. He knew Zoro wasn't small, far from it, Sanji still couldn't take him fully in his mouth. He wondered how he'd take all of him in his body. Thinking about it excited him, much to his surprise.

Slowly, Zoro pulled his finger out, watching each of Sanji's reactions, making sure he didn't move too quickly.

Zoro took a moment to breathe, as though this was as tense for him as for Sanji and Sanji realized that this was a first for Zoro too. Zoro had never done this with a guy before either, not like this.

Zoro started to push back in when only the tip of his finger remained inside of Sanji, pushing in slowly and deliberately. "If you don't like it, say something," Zoro reminded him. "Say it and I'll stop."

"No, it's … it's okay," Sanji said slowly.

Sanji could feel the knots in his stomach coming undone and he wondered why he had ever hesitated to do this with Zoro. He knew he was different from the cooks, that he wouldn't treat him the same, that they were completely different. He knew that. He knew Zoro would be gentle, that Zoro would take his time and as he was proving now, be prepared to stop if it would make Sanji feel less insecure. Everything Zoro had done up until this point was proof that he could be trusted. Everything he still did was even more proof. Sanji had no reason to doubt him.

"A-another."

Zoro looked at him and watched his face, as though gouging his reaction. "You're sure?"

"Fuck yes Zoro, I'm sure," Sanji said.

Slowly the swordsman pushed another finger in. Sanji's breath hitched at the new intrusion and shut his eyes tightly.

"Does it hurt?" asked Zoro.

"I'm … I'm fine," gasped Sanji. "Just … uncomfortable." He took a moment to breathe in deeply at the feel of having two fingers inside of him. It was so different. The lube was cold against his skin and he could feel Zoro's middle finger reached farther than his index. "Keep going."

Zoro slowly pushed in some more. The heat was so much and Sanji couldn't tell if it was his own body that was warming so much or if it was Zoro's hands. He wrapped an arm around Zoro's neck while his other hand remained fisted to the sheets and pulled him up for a kiss. The new angle forced Zoro's fingers a bit deeper into him and Sanji nearly choked, but he held it in.

"I'm sorry," Zoro told him softly. "I know it hurts," he whispered against his lips. "I can stop."

"Don't you fucking dare," Sanji hissed. "Just … kiss me."

Zoro complied.

Sanji could feel Zoro's fingers moving inside of him, slow, subtle movements as Zoro kissed him, distracting him from the pain. He could feel the occasional searing white pain, but Zoro made sure his focus was primarily on him, on their kiss. His fingers began scissoring inside of him, stretching him out.

"I'm going to add another, okay?" Zoro whispered in Sanji's ear.

"Okay," replied the blond softly.

"Hey," Zoro said, hearing the slight tremor in Sanji's voice. "It's just me and you. Focus on me."

And Sanji did. He stared at Zoro's grey eyes with their flecks of light brown, the hazel colour they held and the tanned skin of his body. He focused on the way Zoro's lip curled just a little bit and those three earrings that swayed and made the lightest sound as he moved, focused on the strong body on top of him, the dominating presence that just didn't feel intimidating, that made him feel safe instead. He focused on the way Zoro was mouthing soothing words, whispering sweet nothings in French and some in his native tongue, telling him to stop him if it ever got too much.

Finally, Zoro pulled his fingers out of Sanji and the blond relaxed.

"Do you … do you still want to do this?" asked Zoro in a quiet voice.

Sanji nodded. "I trust you."

Zoro smiled at him sweetly, a smile he so rarely ever saw on his face.

With lube added onto his cock and around Sanji's hole, Zoro lined himself up with Sanji's body. "I'm going to go slowly, okay?" he said.

Sanji nodded and Zoro pushed forward slightly.

It felt like his nerves were burning as the head slowly entered him, his inside felt like they were being torn apart, tissue breaking surely from the pressure and the pain. Flashes of white before his eyes as he couldn't hold in a scream of pain.

Zoro held his cheek, forcing him to look at him. Sanji could see his pain reflected in Zoro's eyes as he whispered to him softly. "Aishiteru," he said in a gentle voice. "I don't want it to hurt, I don't want you to be in pain but it has to hurt before it gets better." And Sanji knew Zoro meant it. Zoro waited patiently as Sanji tried to get his breath back, tried to reign in his thoughts and manage to form a coherent thought past the pain.

"You … you can continue."

Zoro still looked worried, but he slowly eased in some more until an inch more was inside of him.

The pain hurt still, it was still searing, but expecting it this time made the shock wear off a bit faster. He gripped Zoro's arm that lay on the bed, supporting him. He tried to keep himself still, tried to relax, but it was almost impossible. Zoro was big and there was only more to come.

"Shh," Zoro said softly, kissing his face gently. "We don't need to continue."

Sanji shook his head. "No … No … I want to," he said softly.

Zoro gave him a sad look. "It's okay, don't force yourself—"

"I want to do it," Sanji repeated more fiercely. "I … I want this, I do. I just … I need to adjust. Wait for me, okay?"

Zoro said nothing, his mouth drawn in a thin line. He nodded slowly and waited. He always looked so calm and relaxed, but it was clear from the grip Zoro had on the sheets around him he was anything but. His tanned hands were turning paler as he became more and more stressed, watching as Sanji slowly relaxed underneath him.

"Okay," he breathed. "I can take it."

Zoro pushed forward some more. He was half-way inside of him. Sanji only had to endure a little more. He could make it.

His insides burned as he sucked in a deep breath, trying to match his breathing with Zoro's. It became a dull ache, almost like he was numb. That wasn't good, was it? But instead of saying a thing about it, he instead took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down. Zoro wasn't trying to hurt him, it was obvious from the worried expression on his face he thought Sanji was pushing himself too far, he was trying to do something he shouldn't, but instead of saying anything about it, he kept quiet. He watched as Sanji took it, breathing harshly. It took less time the more they went on to get over it, but it still hurt like hell.

"More."

"You don't need to take all of me," Zoro said softly. "It hurts, I can tell. Don't force yourself, please. I don't want to hurt you."

Sanji's eyes met Zoro's fiercely. "We're finishing this," he said. It wasn't a request, it was a command.

Zoro nodded.

Slowly they went on like this until Zoro was inside of him entirely. Sanji was shaking, it was clear, he was scared, he was in pain. Tears were starting to surface on his cheeks but he turned his head away so Zoro couldn't see. Zoro could suck it up, why couldn't he?

"Sanji, stop this, you—"

"We're fucking doing this," Sanji said. "I just need to relax." He took a deep breath, trying to cool his head. He tried to make his body relax and eventually, it did. He felt full, completely and utterly full and though he knew this hurt now, he knew it wouldn't hurt as much when they finally got started. He knew this was just the disaster before the rainbow and the way Zoro went about it so carefully, so gently, as though he were delicate and yet still not made of porcelain, he knew he made the right choice in choosing to do it with him.

Zoro kissed him, the tears that were falling down his cheeks melting into the kiss. It was bittersweet and Sanji began to cry for a reason that had nothing to do with the pain that was slowly disappearing. He took a moment to compose himself and though the taste of the kiss had now turned from sweet to sour, it was still the most mind-blowing thing he had ever experienced.

"Aishiteru," Sanji said softly. "Please, Zoro. I want to do this with you."

Zoro met his gaze and suddenly, everything felt so much more intimate. He could see the beginning of tears behind his beautiful hazel eyes. His grip on the sheets tightened and slowly, he began to pull out. It was agonizingly slow and yet it was exactly what Sanji needed, this tenderness, this care, this was what he needed, this was what Zoro offered. Zoro knew what Sanji needed, even if Sanji didn't know it himself.

Zoro was careful when he moved inside of him, slowly pulling out, keeping his eyes trained on Sanji's face, making sure he didn't do anything the blond didn't like. It was clear in his eyes that he loved him and he wanted this to be the best it could be.

" _Je t'aime,_ " Zoro said softly. "Aishiteru, Sanji."

Sanji smiled, the tear tracks still on his face, but the pain was gone. Instead, he felt pleasure building in his stomach, hot heat of desire as it warmed his body. Zoro pulled out only half-way before slowly pushing back in again. He struck something inside of Sanji that made the blond's head fall back and a loud moan he was sure the neighbours heard escaped his lips.

Zoro kissed him, slowly moving in and out of him, the softest of movements bringing Sanji to his knees. The kisses were tender and though a part of Sanji was begging Zoro to go faster, he knew that if Zoro did, he might start crying again and that would be dreadful.

Sanji could feel Zoro tremble as he moved slowly, restraining himself. He was probably excited, just as Sanji had been when he had first entered Zoro. The tightness, the heat, it had overwhelmed him and yet Zoro was going so softly, so slowly.

Zoro hit that spot again and Sanji swore he saw stars. "Oh God," he moaned, a spark of pleasure hitting his body. He was shaking it felt so good, he was ready to come undone at any moment now. Zoro's eyes were shut tightly as he moved inside of him.

Zoro's body tensed. He was close.

"Sanji, I'm gonna …" Zoro took a sharp intake of breath.

"Me too," Sanji admitted, holding onto him tightly.

It was white. He just saw white, his eyes practically rolling into the back of his head as he felt himself leave his body and feel feather-light. He dug his fingers into Zoro's back, trying his hardest not to scream, but a loud moan escaped him anyway. His fingers raked harshly across Zoro's skin and the swordsman yelled before the two of them finally came back to Earth and Sanji opened his eyes again, seeing the marks on Zoro's body, he couldn't help but smile in satisfaction.

Zoro was his. The marks proved it.

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 5

 **Location: Hotel de la Tour Eiffel (in Paris)**

 **Time: 8:14 AM CETZ**

* * *

Goddammit it hurt.

Wrapped up in Zoro's embrace, Sanji knew the night before hadn't been a dream. He felt swore and yes, it hurt like hell but it was worth it. The night before had been one of the most amazing things he had ever done in his life. He didn't regret it by far.

He was about to roll over and get dressed when Zoro's grip tightened on him.

 _I forgot he was a cuddler._

Sanji grinned, watching Zoro as he breathed. His entire face was relaxed and he looked even younger, any and all worry lines disappearing from his face.

 _"_ Je t'aime. Je t'aime tellement. _Aishiteru. I don't care how many times I need to tell you this until you believe me. I don't know how many times it'll take for me to convince you_ tu es beau. _You're beautiful. I don't know what it'll take, but I'm willing to do anything to convince you."_

Beautiful. You're beautiful he said. Sanji still didn't know what to say to that, no matter how much Zoro insisted it, he could still see the flaws, the imperfections all over himself. His eyes were a strange colour, everyone else had dark eyes while his were an ocean blue. His hair was blond, no Japanese naturally had blond hair, it was weird. His limbs still felt too long for his body, they still seemed to dangle at his sides too much. He thought he spoke a bit funny, his word choice was a little weird, he didn't know how many times people made a comment about the way he said "pardon". And of course, there were the scars.

But the longer Sanji was with Zoro, the more he was beginning to see things just a little differently. Sure, his eyes and hair were strange, but they were unique. Zoro certainly didn't seem to be complaining about the length of his legs either. Zoro also told him various times he loved the sound of his voice and when he poked fun at Sanji's "pardon" it was always playfully and without malicious intent. His scars though …

Zoro had battle scars, Sanji could see them across his chest, everywhere he looked on the beautifully sculpted man, however Sanji's … Sanji's scars were marks of shame, marks of mistakes. Problems he hadn't been able to deal with and instead had opted for horrible solution. A final one. Sanji's scars were a combination of mistakes in the kitchen and a combination of mistakes in judgement. His scars were … His scars didn't hold the same beauty Zoro's did.

"Don't move."

It was whispered so quietly, Sanji wasn't sure he heard it, but he could feel Zoro's grip on him tighten even more so and the lightest trail of kisses down his neck.

"Morning," Sanji said, a smile playing on his lips.

"Mornin'," muttered Zoro into Sanji's neck. The Marimo yawned and met Sanji's eyes. "You have long lashes," he said more to himself than anyone.

"Oh yeah?"

"You've got one in your eye," Zoro said, gesturing.

Sanji felt around and slowly pulled it out. "So I do."

"Gonna make a wish?"

"You believe in superstition?" Sanji teased.

"Not really," Zoro admitted. "But still, it'd be a waste."

Sanji laughed. "Okay then … I wish whatever you wish will come true."

"Wrong answer," Zoro said playfully.

"What do you mean wrong answer? How do you give a wrong answer to a wish?" Sanji demanded.

"You never say something stupid like that. First of all, because you just said your wish aloud, it won't come true. Second of all, you never say that to someone because that's what a mother says to her child when she lets them have the bigger part of the turkey." Zoro grinned. "Try again. Close your eyes and make a wish."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "This is stupid."

"Close your eyes Curly Brow," Zoro said again, poking him gently in the stomach.

Sanji closed his eyes.

 _I wish … I wish we could stay like this. Just like this … forever._

"Are you making a wish?"

Sanji opened his eyes and gave Zoro a look. "I was, until you interrupted."

"Well hurry it up, the eyelash might fly off in the wind and you'll have missed your chance."

"We're in a room with the windows all closed and there's no fan going on, there's no chance of a breeze," Sanji pointed out.

"You're breathing, aren't you?"

Sanji grinned. "Clever."

"Aren't I just?" Zoro winked. "So what'd you wish for?"

"Can't say," Sanji said. "It's a rule."

"Should've never told you that," Zoro said with a grin.

"No, you shouldn't have."

They both broke out laughing as Zoro made a move to sit up properly. "Hey, Marimo?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you remember your proposition?"

"Proposition?"

"You know," Sanji said, letting his hand run over Zoro's chest, feeling a burst of sudden confidence. "The one about the shower?"

Zoro's eyes widened and he choked on air. "W-what about it?"

"Do you think there's such a thing as a second wave of sex addiction?"

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 5

 **Location: Hotel de la Tour Eiffel (in Paris)**

 **Time: 9:56 AM CETZ**

* * *

"Come on, the buffet won't last forever," Sanji pointed out as they rushed down the stairs to the small buffet in the lobby. "We've been in Paris for four days, we're leaving in two and we've never had this breakfast thanks to you and your inability to wake up early!"

"Oh sure, go blaming it on me," Zoro muttered under his breath as Sanji jumped to grab a plate and get in line.

French cuisine did not disappoint, that was for sure. Sanji had eaten French food for the past few days and he felt as though he could never go back. Of course, he was scared to sit down beyond belief seeing as he wasn't a hundred percent sure exactly how much pain he would be in when he attempted at it, but he grit his teeth and once his plate was full took a seat.

"Are you okay?" asked Zoro, crunching ice with his teeth as Sanji began to cut his scrambled egg.

"Fine, why'd you ask?"

"I mean …" Zoro blushed and turned his head away from him. "Just … never mind."

Sanji tried not to turn red himself, but failed miserably. "Um, the pain almost doesn't exist." Sanji grinned at him. It was true, it didn't hurt as much as he thought it would hurt the morning after and the fact that he had been willing to do it again so soon afterwards said a few things about him he supposed.

There were whispers around them though and they made Sanji uneasy. Were people whispering about them? He knew logically the chances of that were pretty improbable, but he tensed and feared for his privacy, fuelling his paranoia.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Liar. Come on, what's up?"

"Just …" Sanji divided up his eggs in a way that would surely make Zeff beat him over the head. No playing with food, that wasn't permitted. "I mean … do you think they know?"

"They who?"

"You know … _them_ ," Sanji said, nodding towards the general area.

Zoro shook his head. "You need to be more clear about these things. Do I think who knows what?"

"Don't make me say it."

"Well you're going to have to say it if you want me to understand you, I'm not a mind reader you know," Zoro pointed out.

"No, never mind."

"Oh come on, now that you've brought it up it's like I have to know," Zoro said. "Please?"

"Did you just beg?"

"You're avoiding the topic."

"Damn, I'm that obvious, aren't I?" Sanji sighed and put his fork down. Taking a deep breath, he mumbled under his breath hurriedly.

"What?" Zoro asked, tilting his head. "I seriously can't hear you."

Sanji frowned, crossing his arms. "Umpha atada?"

"How about you stop covering your mouth with your hand and speak to me like a normal human being?" Zoro asked in a teasing way. "I can't understand you when you do that."

"DO YOU THINK THEY KNOW WE FUCKED?!"

Silence.

Sanji wanted to die.

Zoro blinked. Slowly his face turned red as the silence in the lobby spoke louder than any words either of them had ever heard. Sanji sank low in his seat, slouching for what felt like the first time in his life. His back felt weird in this position, but if he could just get to the ground … He knew Zoro was the cause of many awkward silences at the Baratie, but he had never experienced humility quite like this.

"Well, if they didn't know, I suppose they know now," Zoro said lightly trying to make a joke out of it.

"I can't believe I just did that," Sanji said, covering his face with his hands. "Fuck, I can't believe I just did that."

"Hey we're in France, how many people do you think know Japanese?" Zoro said, putting a hand on Sanji's arm. "For all they know, you could be screaming at me because I put too much salt on your egg."

"Who puts salt on their eggs?" Sanji asked, shaking his head in disgust.

"See, you've forgotten all about it." Zoro grinned. "I doubt anyone here knows Japanese, the only embarrassment you have is the embarrassment you've created for yourself thinking that."

Of course at that moment that damn girl with her damn father came over to them. "You!" the man yelled at Sanji. "What are you doing, teaching my daughter words like that?!"

"Oji-san said a bad word!" screamed the little girl.

"Or you know, there could be a select few who speaks Japanese," Zoro said, trying to hide his laughter. "Can't rule out that possibility."

* * *

Magical Fun France Adventure Day 6

 **Location: Eiffel Tower**

 **Time: 11:34 PM CETZ**

* * *

"Last day so we're at the Eiffel Tower?" asked Sanji with a soft laugh. "Are we here so we can do that cliché couples kissing under the moonlight on top of the Eiffel Tower in the city of love when the clock strikes midnight?"

"I wasn't thinking that, but they do say leave the best for last, don't they?" Zoro asked with a grin. "The view's pretty great here, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it really is."

It was a breathtaking view, really. Seeing all of Paris below him, it looked as though it stretched out for miles and miles. He found himself unable to catch his breath, staring at the lights. "They call it the city of lights too, don't they?"

"Yeah, they do," Zoro said. "They say the same sort of thing about Las Vegas too I hear. Could be wrong though."

It had been an interesting week to say the least from the Louvre to the street fight, ordering food, having French champagne in France, the sex, the strange daughter and father who seemed to be everywhere they turned and of course, the general bonding. Sanji was pretty sure he had never been around Zoro so constantly. They weren't separated for a large amount of time back in Japan, but still, to be attached by the hip practically for the past few days, it had been interesting to say the least.

Between the various tourist spots and getting lost in galleries and having a few more street fights, Sanji could honestly say he had never had a week like this one. In fact he was kind of wishing he wouldn't have to go back.

"Hey, Sanji?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you wanna hear something crazy?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "Isn't everything you say utterly insane?"

"Maybe," Zoro said with a shrug. "You wanna hear my thoughts now?"

"Enlighten me," Sanji teased.

"What if … we never got on?"

Sanji turned to Zoro and frowned. "What do you mean?"

"What if," Zoro said slowly, "we never got on? The plane I mean. If we just stayed here, rented an apartment? Change all my yen to euros, buy new clothes, getting a new ID. What if we just escaped? Never having to look back, never having to deal with the problems that come with being in a restricting country? What if we just … ran away from it all?"

Sanji stared at him, his mouth nearly dropping open. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"You … you want to leave it all behind?" he asked in a quiet voice. "You think we can just pack up our bags and go? You think it's that easy? New passports, new identities? Are you fucking crazy?" Sanji shook his head. His hands gripped the railing of the Eiffel Tower. "You're fucking insane." He shook his head.

"Think about it though," Zoro said. "Really think about it, not just as a flickering thought in your mind, think about what it would be like to be in a place with these kinds of LGBT rights. Think about the freedom they have here—"

 _SMACK!_

It hadn't happened in a long time so of course Zoro was taken off guard when he got a kick to the head. He fell to the floor and surely those around them though it was just a couple's fight, but Sanji knew better. Zoro leaned against the wall, rubbing his head. "Fucking hurts like a bitch," he moaned, a bruise beginning to form.

Sanji dropped to his knees and grabbed Zoro by his shirt collar. "Don't you ever fucking dare say something like that to me again, you hear me, Marimo bastard?!"

"W-what?"

"That's … your idea … it's … it's ludicrous. It's insanity, it's just complete and utter bullshit!"

"Wait, Sanji—"

"No, you wait Zoro Roronoa," Sanji cut him off. "Do you have any idea what you were just suggesting?" He shook his head. "Run away? Escape? Freedom? That's not what you're looking for and you know it! You don't want to escape, you don't need to because you've never been tied down. Do you know what would happen if you ran away? What would happen to the others? What would happen to Luffy and Usopp? Ace and Johnny and Yosaku? What about Nami and Vivi? If you make those girls cry, I'm going to hurt you so much you're going to wish you were dead! A new identity, a new life? Bullshit! I don't know what you're insane reasoning is as to why you want to stay in this fucking country, but I'm getting on that fucking plane tomorrow so either you're helping me with take-off again or else I'll let that man and his fucking daughter do it!"

Zoro blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. Then—

"You'd let a complete stranger banter with you?"

Sanji slammed Zoro's back against the wall. "You know that's not what this is about!"

"I just …" Zoro turned his head away. "You just always act ashamed or like … I don't know, you're uncomfortable when we're in public. I just thought … going somewhere that it's accepted all around, wouldn't that help you? Besides … they have different laws for homosexual citizens, different rules on partners and marriage and rights."

"Don't you dare fucking say you wanted to do this for me," Sanji snapped. "And if you're still not convinced to drop this crazy fucking idea, I'll tell you one word and you'll want to jump on the next plane to Japan."

"Oh yeah? And what word would that be?"

"Mihawk."

Zoro's eyes widened.

"Got your attention, didn't I?" Sanji shook his head. "You don't get it do you? You want to be the greatest swordsman in the world? You want to beat Mihawk, don't you? You want to accomplish Kuina's goal for her, don't you? You want to do what she couldn't do in her lifetime. What the fuck is she going to think when she finds out that you're spending the rest of your days in fucking Paris, France just so your boyfriend won't feel as embarrassed? It'll get to her, she's probably watching over you right now, you fucking moron! She'd fucking kick your ass, that's what she'd do you Marimo if she ever finds out you're going to give up your fucking _life-long_ dream because of some snickers on the fucking sidewalk!"

Sanji tried to catch his breath now that his tirade was over and found that his voice was caught in his throat. He took a deep breath, feeling his whole body shudder as he did so.

Suddenly, Zoro's arm came around and pulled him in close, kissing him silent.

When they pulled away, Sanji rolled his eyes. "Ahou, it's still a few minutes till midnight."

"Kuina would've loved you," Zoro said softly. "She might've even tried to steal you for herself."

"What makes you say that?"

"Everything. The way you talk to me, how you treat me, the way you act, the way you are, who you are. She would've loved you." Zoro turned his head away and Sanji could tell the beginning of tears were beginning to appear in his eyes. "You're fucking crazy, you know that, Curly Brow?"

Sanji grinned at him. "Not as crazy as you, Marimo."

* * *

The ride back to Tokyo was tiring and Sanji could admit he fell asleep a few times on the way. A twelve hour long flight was beyond tiring. He took the gum Zoro offered this time though and when he got off at the terminal, he couldn't help but feel as though he and Zoro had gotten closer during their time away.

Did he regret not going along with Zoro's crazy idea?

Watching the green-haired man be tackled by his awaiting friends, Sanji smiled. Not one bit.

 _Tu es beau, Marimo._

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _Reina : Okay yeah, I'm sorry, I'm horrible with art ... I'm really sorry... I don't quite know how to fix that .. And yeah, not everyone's going to like all the chapters I write. I'm grateful that you were honest about it._

 _noir : Unfortunately, gay marriage is illegal in Japan ..._

 _Random Person : Well, did Zoro meet your standards? I'm just curious, I hope I did this right! It has to be the longest sex scene I've ever done that took that long ... Moving onwards, I hope you liked it!_

 _JustCallMeLucie : Thank God I could pull your interest back in! I wasn't really thinking and so yeah, I put **Death Note** under kids section. And random fact about Dan and Phil, people think they look like L and Light. DAMMIT! I JUST REALIZED ZORO MADE NO COMMENT ON THE WEIRD ARTISTIC STYLE OF COLOURING PEOPLE RED AND BLUE! DAMMIT! I gotta fix that later. And you're right, I made tons of mistakes and I'm really sorry about that. I'm trying to fix them, but it's kinda taking a while ..._

 _Ringochan94 : I hope it was good. The thing is, I have a liking for men who can do both, being on top and on the bottom and I find Zoro and Sanji's relationship is the one that, if done right, displays that there's no lack of power on any side and they're an even balance. I like having an uke Zoro just the idea of him being that vulnerable makes me squeal, but technically speaking, uses the laws of Yaoi (yes I believe they exist) he's drawn to be an uke in a yaoi pariing. Larger and wider eyes, thinner frame, the fact that his eyes are also more circular and his body frame is more lean and he's also shorter than Zoro. Zoro has the seme build, the one with smaller eyes or rather, more squarish, narrowed eyes and a wider torso and such. I don't know, it's a pattern I've learnt and now whenever I read yaoi, I hate the art-styles where they both have big eyes and then I'm just like, "GODDAMN, who's the one on the bottom?!" Is it just me who really wants to read about Smoker taking it up the ass from Ace? I might actually write that into one of my stories ..._

 _VictoriaLovesSmut : I hope it was good for you. (Innuendoes galore, huh?)_

 _Shizuka Taiyou: I had to, I'm sorry, but I had to, it called to me. Yoda said it had to be so._

 _I'mSecretlyANinjaTimeLord : Okay I hope this was good!_

 _lilcutieprincess : Really? Interesting. Which province?  
_

 _Dyloa : Oh THANK GOD! I thought I had offended you a couple of chapters ago and the friendship sort-of-thing I thought we had going on totally evaporated! THANK GOD! Anyway, after reading what you wrote, I kinda went, "Shit, they know I'm Quebecois?" I'm not one of those people who want to separate from Canada, if you even know about that weird, over twenty year old debate, and uh then I imagined Zoro speaking with a Quebecois accent and I laughed. Did I screw up my French? I think I did, didn't I? My teacher showed me this writing evaluation grid and I totally freaked. If you make 9 mistakes in a text of 250 words, you get an 85. Any mistakes, at all, like capitalizing all the first letters of the words of the titles. There's no half-marks, no 86s or 94s, just 100, 85, 75, 65 and then just plain failing! I'm totally freaked out!_

 _Nachtwolke : When I first read Zoro being on the bottom I was like, "how does that work?" and it was a new thing, but it was not negatively received by me. However, I promised ZoSan and SanZo, so yeah, I had to follow through. Any stories I write about them though, there will be both SanZo and ZoSan because I like versatile men. I also read your review while I was in school. I started laughing. Great to know you like Canada. Kinda felt like you just threw that in there, but we appreciate it!_

 _Alright now what I have to say ... I won't give you my exact age but I'll tell you this: I'm between the ages of 15-17. There you go. That includes both 17 and 15, so yeah, I'm either 15, 16, or 17._

 _My question: I have two actually. One being partially a request and then a question and then an actual question. First: look up danisnotonfire on YouTube, and look up AmazingPhil. Watch some of their videos. Follow it up by watching their collaborative videos, they're really good friends and live together. Then tell me if you think they're gay and together._

 _ACTUAL QUESTION: DEAR GOD DID I SCREW THIS SEX SCENE UP?!_


	41. Endlessly

_**Author's Note:** Okay so look at that, this chapter is early! I am SO SORRY IT'S SO SHORT! The next chapter probably won't be that long either and it'll be the last one! I can't believe how long this story is or all the progress I've made with it! Dear God it'll need tons of editing! I have a dare for you guys: to read Zoro's speech the way it's written. You're probably going to get red in the face ... I don't own **One Piece**. I can't believe that the next chapter will be the last! Also, I've narrowed down the next **One Piece** story to a select few I will mention below, so you guys should tell me in your review out of the remaining few which one you want most so I can get started! Lastly, I actually started to write a story on Fictionpress under the username  Otaku Not Weeaboo called **Strange Taste** , so maybe check that out? It's only got one chapter though ..._

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
** By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

Chapter 41: Endlessly

 _There's a shop down the street,  
where they sell plastic rings,  
for a quarter a piece, I swear it.  
Yeah, I know that it's cheap,  
not like gold in your dreams,  
but I hope that you'll still wear it._

-The Cab, _Endlessly_

* * *

Rings were expensive. For some unknown reason, Zoro was only realizing this now. Once, a few years ago, though now that he thought about it, it wasn't all _that_ long ago, he had bought a ring with Nami. It had worn a hole in his pocket the entire time it was there and it felt absolutely dreadful that he could never actually find his voice to speak and tell her what he had wanted to, but now of course, he was going to through the unspeakable hell that was finding another ring, this time for a man just because of a phone conversation that had occurred a few days ago.

Well no, it wasn't just any phone conversation.

Epiphanies, they didn't happen often to Zoro. He could count them on one hand, he had a lot of things he could count on one hand now that he thought about it (number of relationships, number of people he fucked, number of people he had been fucked _by_ , number of swords he owned). Needless to say Zoro hated epiphanies. They weren't pleasant.

He remembered his first ever epiphany had been sometime while he had been in the shower, nineteen and busy rinsing his hair out and then BAM! He realized he was still a pathetic virgin and was going to be twenty soon.

Fast forward to age of twenty-one, after a night with Kuina when they had first started their strange relationship he realized that oh dear God he was in a friends with benefits relationship and did he really want that?

Twenty-two and nine months when he realized she was truly gone and she was never coming back.

Twenty-three, he was falling in love again and this time it was a man who thought of himself with such low standards, it was heartbreaking.

And now, in the present (or rather, a few days ago), April, Zoro Roronoa of age twenty-three, realized that perhaps a reason he wanted to stay in France could've been because there it was legal. Marriage that was.

And so now Zoro stood in a jewellery store, looking remarkably out of place, with Vivi, Kaya and Nami staring at the glittery merchandise that cost far too much. It was pretty simple, if gay marriage was illegal in Japan, Zoro could deal with it. Rather instead, he'd get Sanji a promise ring. Those things were practically like marriage rings anyway, he didn't need some stupid chapel to declare his undying love for the man.

"What about this?" asked Nami, pointing towards a silver ring with three diamonds in it.

Zoro shook his head. "Think budget, remember?"

"You guys are practically loaded since you started to take money from the fights, you're just being cheap," Nami accused him.

"But seriously doesn't that look like a girly ring?" Zoro asked, staring at the diamonds embedded into the ring. He frowned. "It's just so … sparkly."

"Is Zoro Roronoa being sexist?"

Zoro shook his head almost immediately. No, sexist people were people who broke people down, who discriminated, who killed her. He would never be sexist. But still … "It's just really flashy, do you really think he'd like it?"

"It's coming from you Zoro, I don't think he really cares what he gets, he isn't even expecting anything in the first place," Vivi pointed out. "And besides, you've been proving time and time again that you are not the horrible gift-giver we assumed you were. Which means I'm expecting something nice for my birthday," she added with a smile.

"But—"

"Why not get it for him?" asked Kaya. "You're in a serious relationship, and they're right, he's liked everything you've given him so far so why not go for it?"

"I don't have that much money," Zoro reminded them. "There's rent to pay, the cost of all the food we buy, the electricity bill that we have to pitch in partly for, the cost of gas, the cost of the shampoo, essentials, it adds up to a lot and that ring had to be worth more than a ten thousand yen. And it's sparkly."

"Sexist," Nami muttered under her breath.

Zoro frowned. "You know I'm not," he said in a huff.

"I was kidding," Nami said, rolling her eyes. "Look, you want to do something for Sanji? Then how about instead of having us pick his ring, you choose it yourself? It'll be more personal that way. What's his ring-size?"

Zoro gave her a blank look.

"You do know his ring size, don't you?" Nami asked. Zoro continued to stare at her. "Don't you?"

Zoro turned his head away. "It never really came up."

"Unbelievable!" Nami sighed. "You're utterly hopeless."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Zoro muttered.

"No, Zoro's right, the topic of ring size doesn't really come up often in a typical conversation, does it? Especially between two men," said Vivi.

"Thank you!"

"But you really should find out," said Kaya. "I mean it would be sad if you spent all that money and it didn't even fit the guy."

Zoro rubbed his neck sheepishly. "I just … I don't know." He did know though. He wanted it to be a surprise, asking Sanji for his ring-size would be like telling him the entire plan Zoro had in his mind, that just so happened to not include Sanji finding out.

"Well, tell us when you know, alright?" Kaya asked in that kind voice of hers and Zoro swore, she was a saint. More so than Nami would ever be, the addicted gambler she was.

Zoro followed the girls to the exit of the store numbly, wondering how much else he didn't know about Sanji. Sure, ring-size hardly mattered, but what else did he not know? Sanji had become pretty open, he supposed there wasn't much. And then he realized a problem.

Sanji was loaded.

Technically, Zoro had never seen his money or anything like that, but Sanji told him that Zeff gave him his pay for working at the Baratie, even if he wasn't at the Baratie now since he knew where he lived (which made Zoro scared the strangely-moustached man would come and murder him in his sleep). The Baratie was a place where your salary was always high, never minimum wage. Sanji had money, he had said it to Zoro a few times as an argument to pay the rent. He still wasn't allowed to pay, despite how ridiculous Sanji had begun to think it was.

The differences between the two of them suddenly became very obvious to him.

Sanji worked, or rather, had worked at the Baratie, the high-class restaurant with the most amazing food Zoro had ever tasted. He had met high-class people: lawyers, celebrities, relatively nice and agreeable accountants probably, along with astronauts and future Diet members. He lived in a completely different world from Zoro. Zoro worked in Kendo, which gave him money to pay the bills, let him pay rent and sometimes even then, he couldn't manage it. Sure, they were fairly even now, having the money they got from their fights (which then made Zoro wonder if he was using illegal money), but Sanji would always have that starting advantage over him.

Sanji was so polite and seemed to have the manners Zoro's friends always said he lacked. It was no secret that Sanji just seemed comfortable in front of others, or at least, he was less awkward and fumbling as Zoro. He had the looks and a sort of natural charm about him that attracted women and a grace that Zoro couldn't seem to compete with. He was glad that he and Sanji weren't rivals, he already knew he was losing in several categories, but what about Sanji? What did he see in Zoro?

Zoro wasn't a very insecure person. Sure, he wondered if he his breath stank or maybe if the new shirt he bought looked stupid, but he was pretty comfortable in his own skin. He wasn't sure why, he just had a confidence about him that made him almost completely at ease with himself and who he was. Except for now.

Zoro wondered why he had never noticed it earlier, but he was tall. Did Sanji not like that? Though, there was only one centimetre difference, but still ... He was younger than Sanji, practically a child. He could never imagine half of the things Sanji had been through, couldn't even dream of what it was like, couldn't fathom it. He walked in a clunky way that kind of reminded him of stiff soldiers in a line, he watched rather pathetic dramas on TV, he had been drinking until recently ...

Was Zoro out of his league here?

Zoro was very athletic. He performed in kendo and martial arts, kenjutsu was one of his specialties. His hands were calloused and his skin was rough, his hair was just a tad spiky. Sanji had beautiful, porcelain skin, Zoro looked a bit like burnt toast. Sanji had sophisticated clothes that showed his dignity and pride in himself while Zoro sometimes looked in the mirror and thought of himself as a hobo.

Dear God, why was Sanji with him?

"Zoro?"

Zoro shook his head and turned to Vivi. "Hmm?"

"You okay?"

"Fine," Zoro replied, his voice sounding distant even to himself.

"Are you sure?" asked Kaya.

"Yup." Oh Dear God, had he just said "yup"?

"If you're sure," Vivi said slowly with a slight frown on her face.

"I'm sure," Zoro said in a clipped voice.

"Oi, Zoro!" Nami slapped him on the back forcefully. "Don't you owe me twenty hundred?"

Zoro's eyes widened in surprise, his thoughts heading elsewhere from his sudden realization of his unworthiness. "What? Why?"

"Remember I dragged you to the hospital after you got yourself cut up like that?"

Zoro's eyes widened even more. "That was back in November!"

"Yeah well, you think it was easy lugging your heavy body to the hospital?" Nami grinned mischievously. "I'm expected to be paid back with interest."

Thus began the argument about how she was his friend and therefore should not charge him for getting into a stupid situation, since that was absolutely pointless and Nami had achieved her goal of distracting Zoro from his over-thinking mind.

* * *

"Why do we need to be here again?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "There's a leak in the sink. Would you rather we called a plumber and you could pay for them?"

Zoro refocused his attention towards the array of pipes and other plumber-like things that he just didn't understand. If he was going to be perfectly honest, he was pretty sure he and Sanji might just make the sink worse. He also couldn't see why they didn't just use duct-tape, considering it was the very thing that seemed to make the world go round.

Out of nervous habit, Zoro placed his hand into a random box of items and let his hand wander around before he took it out and started to play with it. It was a rather large hexagon shaped bolt? Was that the right word? He didn't know much about plumbing.

As he twiddled his fingers and played with it, it slipped fairly easily onto his finger. "What's this?" he asked Sanji, holding up his finger.

"A digit? Your index finger?" Sanji rolled his eyes. "You're not so stupid that you don't know what your own fingers look like, are you?"

"Ahou, I wasn't talking about that, I meant this." Zoro gestured towards the strange bolty-thing attached to his finger.

"That's a nut," Sanji said. "You use it with bolts. We don't need one though, I don't think we do at least ..." Sanji seemed to lose himself in thought for a moments before shaking his head. "No, we don't need it."

Zoro shrugged and pulled at the "nut". It did not come off.

"Um, Sanji?"

Sanj turned around from inspecting a pipe to see Zoro trying (and failing) to get the nut off his finger. "Marimo, what did you do?"

"Nothing, it just got stuck!" Zoro snapped, glaring at his stupid index finger.

"You've got rough calluses," Sanji said, shaking his head. "And now you have a nut stuck to your finger, great. We're going to have to buy it, won't we? Unless there's butter somewhere around here?"

"Why do we need buffer?"

"Lube?" Sanji said as though it were obvious.

Zoro stared at him, blushing furiously.

"Not like that, ahou!" Sanji snapped.

Zoro blushed even harder for thinking like that. He turned his head away and shrugged. "You can't blame me and it's not like I said it aloud or anything …"

Sanji sighed, shaking his head. "Let's just pretend that never happened, alright?"

Zoro nodded enthusiastically. He'd prefer if his embarrassment was only minimal. "I think we need to buy it though," Zoro said, staring at the nut. "It doesn't seem like it'll come off."

"This could only ever happen to you, couldn't it?" Sanji said with a sigh.

The two bought the nut, along with the new piping they needed.

* * *

"Where does this thing go?" asked Zoro. Lying on his back underneath the sink was a hazard in his opinion. At any moment, he could just bolt right up and smack his head. Why had he decided not to ask for a plumber to deal with the situation again?

"Um, it says it goes to the left," said Sanji. "Make two Ls with your hands, the one that's a forwards L is your left."

"I know the difference between left and right," Zoro snapped, rolling his eyes. He still checked though.

"Okay, then you screw it in," Sanji explained.

"Screw what where?" Zoro asked.

"Here, let me help."

 _CLANG!_

Zoro tried to sit up and hit his head, predictably, on the pipes underneath the sink. He laid back down and instead made a kicking motion with his feet. "Don't just touch my thigh like that!" he snapped, blushing furiously.

"Get out of there, I'll just do it," Sanji said, rolling his eyes. He pulled at Zoro's legs, forcing him from under the sink. "I know the instructions and I know my cardinal points."

Zoro huffed, but obliged.

"Where's the butter?" he asked.

"What's that have to do with anything?"

"This stupid fucking nut is still stuck to my knuckle," he reminded Sanji. "And I kinda want to get it off."

Sanji sighed. "Do you seriously not know where the butter in your own apartment is?"

"Ours."

"What?"

To be honest, Zoro hadn't even realized he had blurted out his thoughts. Sanji was frozen, underneath the sink, his legs on a complete stop, his hands refusing to move. "Nothing," Zoro said quickly.

"No, what did you say?" Sanji pressed. "I can get out from under here and tickle you to death you know," Sanji reminded him.

Zoro shivered involuntarily. "I just said … it's ours. It's our apartment."

Sanji came out from under the sink and grinned at Zoro.

"What? I told you, you can't attack me now! If you do, that'll just mean you're being an asshole— Umph?"

Sanji shut him up fairly quickly with a kiss, pulling him down to his level by grabbing the bottom of Zoro's shirt and forcing him to fall onto him. The swordsman grinned foolishly against the cook's lips and pulled him closer, caressing the back of his head.

Unfortunately, oxygen is necessary and therefore Zoro had to pull away. He grinned. "What was that for, Curly Brow?"

"Couldn't stand to hear your stupidity much longer," Sanji replied, his stupid expression matching Zoro's. "Sorry."

Zoro smirked. "Well I suppose I should say more stupid things, shouldn't I?"

"Perhaps," Sanji said with a grin.

Zoro went in for another kiss, threading his fingers through Sanji's hair. It was so soft and it calmed him, running his fingers through his hair so gently. That was, until he had to tug and Sanji let out a sudden wince.

"The nut," said Sanji. "I think it got caught."

Zoro sighed. "Okay, we really need to get this thing off of me," he said. Slowly he tried to pull his hand away, attempting to pull his hand out of Sanji's hair. Well, this felt awkward. "How much would you hate having butter in your hair?"

Sanji's look was all he needed to answer his rather, admittedly dumb, question.

"Right, I'll get on it then."

It took seven minutes and thirty-nine seconds. Yes, Zoro had such clumsiness within him.

Once Zoro's hand was finally out of Sanji's hair, the blond immediately got the butter out of the fridge to avoid having this awful experience again.

The nut slipped off of his finger fairly easily once it was greased enough. Sanji sighed. "Fifty yen for this?" He shook his head. "We don't even need it. And how the fuck did you get it stuck on your finger?"

Zoro shrugged. He just had skills like that.

Sanji twirled the nut around in his hand before slipping it onto his finger.

"Don't do that, we'll have to get more butter!"

"It's fine," Sanji said. "I don't have big meaty hands like yours," he teased. Slipping it off his finger once more, he handed it back to Zoro. "Anyway, I'm going to finish fixing the sink and then hopefully doing the dishes won't be hell anymore."

With that, Sanji left to finish fixing that damn pipe while Zoro had a brilliant idea.

* * *

Now to put that great idea into action was a completely different thing all together.

Of course doing this the first time was basically impossible for him and had not actually happened, so how the hell was he going to do it this time? So many things had changed between when he had wanted to do it for her and now.

Jesus Christ, Zoro was pretty sure he was having a heart attack.

Keeping the nut which wasn't actually a ring in his pocket sort of helped, but not really, he really should have bought a real ring. The girls were kind of right, Zoro kinda was a cheap ass, but still! Zoro had to plan out the most perfect way possible to ask Sanji (metaphorically since you know, gay marriage was illegal in Japan …) so there was no way this could be done stupidly. Like say, Sanji finding out about it sort of by doing the laundry and accidentally coming across it inside one of Zoro's jean pockets and then asking him what it was? Yeah, that couldn't happen.

But it did anyway.

"That," Zoro said slowly, "is something I was meaning to throw out."

 _Idiot._

Sanji raised an eyebrow. "So do you want me to just toss it now?"

"No!"

Sanji gave him a strange look. "Okay … You're acting weird Zoro, is something up?"

"Nothing," Zoro said quickly. Too quickly.

"Okay well if you want to throw it out, there garbage's right there so—"

"You can't throw it out!"

Sanji blinked. "Why can't I? You just said you wanted to toss it, it isn't good to become a hoarder, you know, Marimo."

"I lied!"

Sanji shook his head. "Okay, start telling me this slowly and properly, alright? From the beginning? And remember to breathe in between, I don't want a repeat of Valentine's Day where it looked like you were going to start hyperventilating."

"I kinda sort of thought about Paris, right? And how we went there and I said we should totally stay there because why not, they have nice gay laws and are nice to LGBT people except for whatever bastards you thought existed in the streets, so yeah, Paris is nice, yeah? Okay so then on the way back on the plane I kinda came across this realization as to why exactly I wanted to stay there and I think it might have something to do with Freud, not that I put much faith in psychology as you know but my mind was subconsciously telling me I wanted to get married, which is weird cause I'm twenty-three, I haven't experienced all of life yet and why limit myself by marriage but then I realize I wouldn't be limiting myself because of who I wanted to marry, which is where you come in, well, hopefully where you should come in because I mean it'd be really bad if I were cheating on you— which I would never do by the way— and so then I was like, I should buy a ring, shouldn't I? But the laws of a marriage for gay people in Japan are pretty fucked up and so then I'm kinda wondering why we have a gay red-light district and yet no marriage laws for gays … But anyway so then I was like, let's go shopping with all the girls and buy a ring but then I realized I didn't know your ring size and that you have money and are polite and look really, _really_ beautiful in clothing— and without, cause you know, I'm male, I have hormones and yeah I'm going to stop talking about that subject right now— and you're very sophisticated and you know Latin, which no one ever knows which could mean you're like a wise, old soul but yeah and no, you're not that much older than me so I wasn't trying to make fun of your age and anyway so then I realized that I was way in over my head but then Nami distracted me now that I think about it so I haven't thought about it in a while so yeah, that happened and now I'm thinking about it again because my God are you beautiful and I'm a weird piece of burnt toast, and not even French toast, which I don't know exactly why they call it French toast, same way I don't know why it's called a French kiss, but anyway, moving onwards from that topic. So yeah I'm basically scum at the bottom of your shoe and you ahem every right to refuse me but I'm absolutely, completely, irrevocably —don't smirk like that, I didn't have to look up the word, I know it, I'm not totally stupid— in love with you and I would absolutely love it if we could spend eternity together which is really a long, long time and I realize how far we've come in such little time from being acquaintances to begin kidnapper and captive and then therapist and therapist for a little bit and then friends and then boyfriends which is amazing and if that's as far as you want to go with me, I'm okay with that but I swear Sanji, you're the greatest thing that's ever happened to me and I'ms sorry if I'm rushing and I'm red in the face but I think I just realized how incredibly long this has been and how I've completely embarrassed myself trying to tell you that I accidentally got a nut stuck on my finger and then you put it on yours and it looked perfect so I wanted to give it to you as a promise ring because Japan law is stupid and has a think against gays and is so homophobic for a country that created yaoi and if you would accept it I would absolutely love to spend the rest of my existence with you, however short or long it may be, depending on how much my stupidity controls my actions so I guess what I'm trying to say is this is the temporary ring before Japan finally changes its damn mind and lets us get married with chapels and churches and all that shit and we're not eloping because you know how well that worked out for Romeo and Juliet and oh dear God I think I'm hyperventilating please stop me before I do something even more stupid—omph."

When they pulled away, Sanji smirked. "Had to stop your stupidity."

"Feel free to, any time," Zoro said with a grin. "So is this okay?" he asked. "I mean my failure of a ring and all."

Sanji rolled his eyes. "We're buying a real one."

And that was that.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay first the thank-yous!_

 _Random person: OH THANK GOD! You have no idea how much I was stressing over that!_

 _Shizuka Taiyou : I found that this story ended up portraying Zoro as more of a perve ..._

 _JustCallMeLucie : To each your own, I finished the book and I can't handle it, my mind just totally combusted._

 _Ringochan94 : Which is why I have a policy that every yaoi story I write shall have both people as ukes and semes. I don't remember if I mentioned it before, but I read a Sirius and Remus story in which James, Lily and Peter were discussing who they thought topped in the relationship until Sirius and Remus turn up and are like, "Ever heard of taking turns?" and I was like, "YES! DEAR GOD YES!"_

 _versora : For some reason, your comment made me think of Ed from **FMA** and a comment on how many right hand gloves he goes through. Sanji WOULD kill Zoro for ruining his shirt though._

 _noir : Sorry ..._

 _I'mSecretlyANinjaTimeLord : If you'd give me the name of the story, I'd check it out if you want ... Oh my God, but Dan and Phil, their archive is so depressing ... You know there's a web shows section on this site? I never knew it existed, but Dan and Phil, everyone's convinced that a) Phan is real, and b) Phil, or Dan is suicidal. WHY?! WHY KILL THEM?! THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL! AND THEY WROTE A BOOK, THEY WROTE A FRIGGING BOOK! Sorry, I just watched the making of the book and now I have to go to the local book store and buy it. It's over 200 pages with full-colour pictures! Pardon my fangirling ..._

 _lilcutieprincess : I've said this before, but I'll say it again: THANK GOD!_

 _X. summergrey .X. (x6): OH MY GOD! Just kind of watching as each day I got a new review from this one person who found my story and is reading it and catching up... I can't describe it. I'm so glad you like this story! I'm always slightly afraid to enter fandons for fear that I'll screw them up or something, especially with AUs, I'm so beyond glad you like this! You should watch me watch anime, I get so into it, I start screaming and my parents are like, "is she having a seizure?" Would you believe me if I said you were the only person who caught that? The breathing thing? (I apologize, I had to write your username this way or else the stupid thing would take it out.)_

 _crystalbluefox : Okay, first of all: I would love to read your original story while you work on it, (if it's in English, sorry my vocabulary only reaches English, French, a tad of Spanish and Japanese ...) and second are you ready for this? My parents always tell me that writing is an impractical form of career, so that I could be something like a lawyer, but on the side be an author of law crime books. Thing is, I've been writing since I was 9 and I've actually written a few books (not published) and my last birthday present wish was to have it published. There's this thing that I can't remember the name of, but if you have a manuscript of a book, you can send it to them and they'll make it for 300 dollars and then you get 10 copies of the book and it's sold in your local book store and so I just want to perfect the book before I get my birthday present. Might have to wait till I'm in my 20s though since it could take a while ... But anyway, yeah, I really want to write. I do like law, I have an interest in criminal law specifically because there's just something about a courtroom that I really like. I would like to write and make a living like that, like say, JK Rowling, but not everyone can be her and make money by writing and nothing else. Someone actually told me to change the names and make it into an original story for publishing, and I would, but the problem is a lot of the plot relies on Zoro's three-sword style and them being Japanese and Sanji being an out-cast cause he's a Japanese with blond hair and I don't think I could get away with that without copyright infringement. So yeah, I hope my strange creative writing/law dream isn't too boring for you. I think it's great that you want to own a restaurant, I kinda just think if I could have my own work published and would be able to hold it in my very own hands, I could die happily, I just really want to see a printed final copy of this series I've been writing that I've devoted over five years of my life to and know that it didn't go to waste._

 _Okay now the final stories that you guys on the polls have narrowed it down to are these (I'm saying the top 3):_

 _ **Tag** : Sanji hates taggers, graffiti artists who vandalize the city, and to his great rage, they've decided that the back wall of the Baratie will be their next target. But as much as Sanji hates those "artists", he finds himself falling in love with a tagger who signs their art with a jolly roger with three swords. Will he still feel the same way when he finds out who it is?_

 _ **The Yakuza's Son:** Sanji's having a shitty day and the fact that some idiot ran over his last pack of cigarettes is doing nothing to improve his mood. When the strangely green-haired man gets out of his car to yell at him, Sanji just snaps. How was he supposed to know the shitty Marimo was the hier to the yakuza?!_

 _ **Speechless** : Three years. It had been three years the last time he had uttered a word. No one asked him why, he wouldn't answer even if they did. It had just become a fact: Sanji did not speak._

 _So there you have it, the top 3 stories for my next **One Piece** story. My question for this chapter: which one of these do you want me to write?_


	42. Little Wonders

_**Author's Note** : Okay so I can't believe it, this is the last chapter of **Beautiful Disaster**! I hope this was as interesting and thrilling for you as it was for me. I have to thank you guys so much, I was beyond nervous to enter this fandom, since there are others who know this archive so much more than I do and I was sure I was diving into disaster. This was also another one of those things I've never tried before (abuse, rape, self-harm, sex scenes in general ...) so I'm really glad you guys liked it! If you guys haven't noticed, I've started to write a story called **Speechless**. For those of you who wanted other stories, I plan on writing them all, but it was really just a matter of which would be written first. If you want to read more about what I've written, then I guess check out my profile or my new story. If you're sick of me and I've made you hate the fandom, I apologize. I don't own **One Piece**. I will be asking you one last question at the end of this chapter. I can't believe this is really happening ... I hope this ending doesn't suck!_

* * *

 _ **Beautiful Disaster  
**_ _By: Setkia_

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is the assistant cook of the world-renowned restaurant, the Baratie, the only restaurant like it in the world. He's a successful chef and flirts with the customers every chance he can get but there's a problem. It's all a facade. The cooks give a new meaning to the word "abusive", both mental and physical. The only thing keeping Sanji alive is his love for cooking and a good ol' pack of cigarettes.**

 **Zoro Roronoa is a swordsman who suddenly has more change in his pocket than he expected and enters the Baratie by recommendation. His waiter happens to be a curly browed man with an adoration for cigarettes. An attempt speak to the head chef goes horribly wrong and he gets sucked into the crumbling world of the chef's, wondering how he can possibly save him and better yet, why does he want to save him in the first place?**

* * *

 **WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER, the following things are present in this chapter of _Beautiful Disaster:_**

 **Mentions of rape, past self-abuse, abuse**

* * *

Chapter 42: Little Wonders

 _Our lives are made  
In these small hours  
These little wonders,  
These twists & turns of fate  
Time falls away,  
But these small hours,  
These small hours still remain_

 _-_ Rob Thomas, _Little Wonders_

* * *

"What do you want to do?"

Sanji gave Zoro a strange look. A typical Wednesday afternoon lying in bed, staring at the ceiling while tracing patterns across the others chest and now they were asking about what Sanji wanted to do? "What do you mean?"

"What's your dream in life? I realize you've never told me," Zoro said. He laced their fingers together, grinning. Six months later and the nut was replaced with a ring, along with a matching ring. Yes, Zoro had decided to stop being cheap and they had settled for a simple, silver band with a single bronze jewel in the centre.

"My dream?" Sanji repeated, frowning slightly. "I never really thought about it."

"You're going to be twenty-five in March and you've never considered what your dream is?" Zoro shook his head and laughed. "Come on, I've known since I was eight, you can't seriously tell me you have no true aspirations in life, can you?"

Sanji shrugged. "I mean I guess I have one, but it's kind of stupid."

"Tell me."

The cook took a deep breath and sighed. "I … I don't know …"

"If you have a dream, you have to tell me. You already know all of my idiotic friends' dreams."

" _Our_ idiotic friends," Sanji corrected.

Zoro laughed. "Right. Our idiotic friends." He pulled their hands lower towards their stomachs and grinned. "Are you scared? You know you can tell me anything."

"It's not really a dream that you'd have any interest in," Sanji said. "I mean I want to do it, but still … And haven't we kept your friends in the dark for long enough?"

"About what? They know we're in a relationship."

"I meant about my past."

Zoro blinked. He looked Sanji in the eyes and gulped. "Are you sure?"

"I'm ready for them to know," Sanji said. "I don't want to live a lie anymore."

"You're not living a lie," Zoro said, rolling his eyes. "You just haven't told them everything."

"It still feels the same as lying."

Zoro nodded and brought their joined hands up to his mouth, kissing Sanji's knuckles gently. "Then we'll do it when you're ready. Now about that dream of yours?"

Sanji bit his bottom lip.

He and Zeff had created a restaurant out of nothing, built it up and had it ruined before their very eyes. Even without Patty and Carne there, having been fired four months previously much to Sanji's great joy, the rumours about what had happened on those days would still remain. The restaurant's reputation was ruined, at least to the few who had witnessed the abuse and Zoro's fight with the cooks. Sanji wanted to build something concrete, something without taint, something that would stand forever, start a legacy. But surely Zoro would have no interest in something like that?

"You're over-thinking things again," Zoro told him softly.

"You under-think things too often," Sanji shot back with no real venom in his words.

"So …?" Zoro pressed.

Sanji sighed. "A restaurant." He looked at Zoro briefly before turning away and taking a deep breath. "When Zeff took me in, we had one thing in common. Food. We both loved cooking and we had both either seen or experienced someone going hungry and we didn't want that to ever happen again. We created a restaurant with the hopes of feeding every hungry person who came by. I know the prices were high, but we didn't intend to let anyone who wanted to eat leave without having at least one meal. But the more the staff grew, the less those priorities became … well, priorities. In the end it kinda went to hell. I want to create something that holds its purpose, a restaurant that accomplishes what it set out to do." Sanji shook his head. "Sounds stupid, right?"

Zoro was silent for a moment.

Sanji took it as confirmation.

"Stop that."

Sanji gave Zoro a strange look. "What do you mean?"

"You were just imagining the worst case scenario, weren't you?" he accused.

"What? No I wasn't!"

"You so were," Zoro said, frowning. "When are you going to realize I'm not them? I'm not going to judge you like you think I will." His brow creased. "I don't want you to worry about anything, okay?"

"Yeah well, I can't just get over it that quickly," Sanji said. He sighed. "I wish I could write a letter to myself from the past, tell him all the screw-ups he made and teach him to avoid them. It'd be wonderful."

"I wouldn't want that," Zoro said softly. "I mean if you could avoid what you went through that would be amazing and wonderful, but then if that happened, you might not have met me. And I don't want to imagine my life without you," Zoro blushed, turning his head away. "If I wrote a letter to a younger me, then I guess Kuina would still be alive She wouldn't have killed herself, maybe I'd have been more social, maybe I would've joined some support group for feminists or something, I don't know. Maybe I wouldn't have taken up kendo, therefore wouldn't have eventually had enough money to go the Baratie. Never regret anything in your life, you might hate it now, but if it hadn't happened, you wouldn't be where you are now. You like where you are now in life, right?"

"Yeah," Sanji said softly.

"So don't regret anything."

Sanji nodded but he knew it would take longer to get there than Zoro implied.

"So you want to start a restaurant of your own," Zoro said. "I think that's great. I could help you with it, I don't know, figure out colour schemes or something?"

"Colour schemes?" Sanji snorted.

"What?"

"Can't imagine you as an interior designer," Sanji said, laughing.

"I think I could make it sexy," Zoro said with a grin.

"Oh yeah? I'd like to see you try."

"Was that a challenge?"

"Maybe."

The two of them burst into laughter, unable to hold it in anymore.

Sanji bit his bottom lip and grinned. This, he decided, this was how he wanted to spend the rest of his life.

* * *

"Is this actually happening?" asked Nami in a voice of fake disbelief. "Are Zoro and Sanji actually hosting a party at their own house for once?"

Luffy rubbed his hands together and grinned. "I can't wait to have some of Sanji's steak!" he said, laughing. "You make your own sauce, don't you?"

"Of course," Sanji said, trying not to look too nervous.

He told himself over and over again he was ready and Zoro told him not to rush it, but he wanted to get it off his chest. He wanted there to be no murky water between him and his friends. He was starting live over again, a fresh start. As much as he wanted to forget his past, they deserved to know. They had accepted Sanji despite knowing nothing about his background and it was about time they knew.

Sanji laid the last plate down on the table and cleared his throat.

Luffy, Usopp, Nami, Vivi, Kaya and Ace all sat before him and suddenly he felt as though his throat was clamming up. Oh dear God, was he going to have another attack? He had been fine for the past few months, but what if that was the calm before the storm?

He felt Zoro's hand on his shoulder, pulling him out of his rapidly running thoughts. "I uh, decided something," Sanji said in a voice he hoped wasn't shaking from his nerves. "Over a year ago, I pushed my way into your lives and I'm sure you have questions about where I'm from. Zoro didn't tell you anything because I wasn't ready for you to know. But," Sanji sucked in a deep breath, "I'm ready now."

The table was silent, obviously waiting for him to continue. There was no judgement in their eyes, only worry and it helped relax him a little bit.

"I guess the first thing you should know is where I came from. When I first met Zoro, it was at a restaurant. The Baratie."

Luffy's eyes seemed to widen in recognition at the name.

"You might've heard about it, there was a law-suit filed against it a few months ago by a man by the name of Fullbody. It's a very high-class restaurant, five stars, so I'm told." He bit his bottom lip. "If you've read the newspapers, then you'd know that the law-suit was filed because a man was attacked. By Zoro."

No one seemed surprised that Zoro had lost his temper at someone, but they didn't know why of course. Sanji could see the non-comprehension in their eyes, asking questions, but not daring to word them quite yet.

"If you haven't heard of that case then a less recent case would be the one in which another man was attacked, verbally and physically, by two cooks who had previously worked there." Here, Sanji had to close his eyes and remember to breathe properly. "Those men's names were Patty and Carne. The one they were attacking … was me."

Nami closed her eyes and began shaking her head, Vivi had a look of pure horror on her face and Kaya was mumbling to herself, something about how it was impossible. Ace had a grim look on his face that matched Luffy's. Usopp looked at Zoro as though to ask why he hadn't said anything before now.

"If you remember, a few months ago I donated Zoro some of my blood because the idiot got himself into a stupid fight," Sanji said. "And Nami, I'm sure you saw I had a few markings on myself. If Luffy would remember, I had a few scars on myself when we first met." Sanji closed his eyes and slowly rolled up his right sleeve. He didn't want to cry, he wouldn't cry, but dear God was it hard not to. "I … was abused during the time I worked at the Baratie." The tears were trying to slip out past his shut eyelids, but he bit his lip and tried to hold them back. "For a little over fourteen years, I was physically abused as well as mentally." He drew in a long, deep breath, knowing he was shaking. "Shortly before Zoro took me out of there, they had begun to … sexually violate me,"

Here, Vivi and Nami gasped while Kaya had turned her head away and seemed to be sobbing.

Sanji drew in a shaky breath. "I … also used to be depressed and had an inferiority complex, as well as a few other problems …" Sanji didn't want to name them all right then, saying he used to be suicidal and cut was not something he wanted to broadcast. He wasn't ready just yet to let that part of him be known. He didn't know just how to word it, how to finish his shaky speech and he was sure his knees were close to buckling and he was on the verge of tears, if he wasn't crying already.

Sanji drew in a shaky breath. "I just … thought you deserved to know."

Wincing, he opened his eyes, ready for the wave of sympathy, disgust, or whatever other emotion the others saw fit to associate with his situation.

He saw none of it.

He saw admiration. He saw respect. He saw pride.

"S-Sanji," said Kaya, pushing aside Usopp's hand that was offering her a handkerchief. "You … you're very brave."

Vivi and Nami nodded in unison, as though to confirm Kaya's words.

Luffy's eyes were shining with respect. He didn't seem to be able to form words, but it was obvious he had a new respect for Sanji that went farther than his fighting ability and his cooking skills.

Sanji didn't understand it, he just couldn't comprehend why this was something that caused the group to be so admiring of him. Wasn't he soiled? Tainted? Why were they looking at him like he was some sort of hero? It didn't make any sense!

Sanji didn't trust his throat to work and instead took a seat at the table, the entire room falling into silence.

He was tense throughout the entire dinner and yet when it was over and everyone was getting ready to leave, it was as though nothing had changed. As though nothing Sanji had said had changed their opinion of him for anything more than the better.

When they said good-bye to the last guest, Zoro wrapped his arms around Sanji tightly.

"You're amazing, Sanji," he said softly whispering into his hair.

"W-why were they …" Sanji couldn't stop the tears now, they were coming out and his grip on Zoro tightened. He closed his eyes tightly and gripped Zoro's shirt. "I don't understand," he said. "Why … aren't they disgusted?"

"There's nothing to be disgusted of," Zoro said gently. "How many times will I have to tell you this? You're strong Sanji. You're so strong."

"But …"

"They admire you because you made it out alive, they respect you because you weren't beaten when others would've fallen, they are proud of you because you defied odds," Zoro said softly. "They're amazed by what you've managed to conquer. Remember what I told you? Don't ever be ashamed of your scars, they're signs that you're stronger than what tried to kill you."

Zoro tilted Sanji's head up and kissed him gently. "You're strong and beautiful Sanji."

"I'm a disaster," Sanji said, shaking his head. He thought he had come far, but here he was, crying while being held by his boyfriend for saying the very thing he should've said in the first place. He hadn't made any progress, sure, the cutting had stopped, the nightmares had receded, but in the end he was still terrified, he was still worried, he was still paranoid.

"You're a beautiful disaster then," Zoro said with a grin. "And you're mine. Remember these?" Zoro gestured towards the ring on his finger. "The second they legalize this, I'm asking you."

"Is that a threat?" Sanji teased, Zoro already lightening up his mood.

"Perhaps."

Sanji grinned. "I look forward to it then."

* * *

"Why am I blindfolded? Is this some sort of weird kink you've discovered?"

"I wasn't thinking about it like that before, but now I am, thanks for that," Zoro said with a grin. "Can't you just trust me? We're almost there."

"This isn't going to be one of those things where you take off the blind fold and you're asking me to prom or some shit like that, are you?"

Zoro laughed and whispered in Sanji's ear. "No, it's better."

"Anything's better than that, who would want to go to a shitty prom?" asked Sanji to no one in particular.

"You're ruining the moment," Zoro told him. He spun Sanji around slowly, much to Sanji's discomfort. He trusted Zoro, but he still preferred to see things with his own eyes rather than someone else's. "Okay, you can take it off now."

"So we're not having kinky blindfolded sex?" Sanji said.

"Bastard, just take it off!"

"You just get right to the point, don't you Marimo? I can't preform under pressure—"

"Stop turning this into an innuendo!" Zoro said with a frustrated sigh. "I'll just do it!" Zoro pulled at the piece of cloth over Sanji's eyes and the blond had to blink several times to adjust to the new light.

When he was finally able to see properly again, he was confused.

He was standing in an empty room, very big, very broad. It almost reminded him of an empty ballroom. There were swinging doors on one side of the room and a twirling staircase leading to an upper floor. It kind of reminded Sanji of a vacant Baratie.

"Zoro, what's going on?"

"I uh, I've been kind of saving up," Zoro said, rubbing his neck sheepishly. "And I thought abbot what you told me, about the Baratie and how much you wanted it to be a place that served everyone could be like a home for you and the ones you loved and so I rented out this building and I was wondering if we could maybe, possibly, potentially start a restaurant here?"

Sanji's mouth dropped open. "What?"

"It was just an idea," Zoro said quickly. "I mean you don't have to, I just thought since you can't really go back to the Baratie then you would need somewhere else you could feed people and make them happy," he reasoned. "I could just tell the guy in charge we don't want the space—"

"Don't you fucking dare," Sanji said, grinning widely.

"So I take it that we're going to take it?" Zoro asked, giving him a cheeky grin.

"I'm killing you if we don't take it," Sanji promised.

"Would now be a good time to mention that I've decided I'm going to let you pay rent?"

Sanji stared at him. "Are you serious?"

To be able to pay rent, it made everything more real, paying rent meant that now Sanji was contributing towards the taxes, he was finally being allowed to pay his own electricity bills, his own water fees. It might add up to a lot, but that meant that if Zoro was depending on him to pay half the rent, that would mean he needed him there, there would be no reason to kick him out, no way to get rid of him.

It made everything seem even more permanent than the rings, the declarations of love, the nights sharing the same bed and all the fabulous dinners combined together.

This was real.

"Yeah," Zoro said, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. "If you still want to—"

"Of course I fucking want to, Marimo!" Sanji said, rolling his eyes. He would get to pay rent, they were going to buy this building, they were going to legally own something together, both their names would go on the lease, it would truly be theirs.

"We need need a name for this joint," Zoro pointed out. "Unless you want the Baratie two-point-o."

Sanji shook his head. "I've got the perfect idea."

"It's not going to be something stupid like Basket or something, is it?"

"Chez Marimo," Sanji said with a grin that split open his whole face. "Got any complaints?"

"Does this mean we'll have to be associated with that weird-ass book store?"

Sanji shook his head and laughed. "Got a problem with my naming skills, Marimo?"

"I'd say you've come a long way," said Zoro, wrapping an arm around the frame of the thin cook.

"We both have," Sanji said.

"We're getting too mushy, aren't we?" Zoro asked, turning to Sanji with a grin.

"It's humanizing," Sanji said.

"More like humiliating," Zoro said, rolling is eyes.

Sanji hit him gently in the chest, giving him a quick kiss.

"You missed," Zoro said.

"What do you mean I—murph!"

At that moment the door opened and in walked Luffy, Nami and Ace.

Ace snickered. "Should we leave them alone?"

"Oh my God, was that his tongue?" Nami squealed.

"I think your girlfriend has a gay fetish," said Ace, turning to his brother with a frown. "Should we have her checked?"

Zoro pulled away from Sanji and rolled his eyes at the trio in front of him. "Get out!" he yelled.

Sanji grinned and gave Nami an apologetic look. "Sorry Nami but me and the Marimo need to break in the room, get a feel of the place, you know," he said.

"You guys are going to have hot kinky restaurant sex, aren't you?" Nami said with a pout.

"Go," Zoro said, pushing at Nami to get her to leave.

When she finally did leave along with the D Brothers, Zoro turned to Sanji and grinned. "Now what were we doing?"

"I believe Nami called it hot, kinky restaurant sex?" Sanji said, twirling the fabric of Zoro's shirt and pulling him closer.

"Long title, isn't it?" Zoro said with a grin, kissing Sanji gently. "They really should, shorten it—"

"Shut up and fuck me Marimo."

Zoro obeyed.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank yous! (The last ones for **Beautiful Disaster** ... I'm still in shock.)_

 _Guest : I am beyond glad you enjoyed it and hopefully, you liked this chapter too!_

 _bronze andromeda shun : And I realize that you've reviewed to Speechless before I saw your review here ... Well, I hope this wasn't a dreadful ending for you and that you enjoyed your wild ride with me._

 _Shizuka Taiyou: And I know about two of those people you said were perves. The other one, not so much. Don't even ask me why, but I love the idea of innocent guys and Zoro started off that way and then he just kinda got ... messed up. Such is life._

 _Vicky : Tada, I hope you haven't loved the story only to hate the ending ..._

 _Random Person : ALWAYS LOVE THE AWKWARD!_

 _KleinXDgirl: **Ten Count,** what do I say about it? It's killing me, that there hasn't been a new english translation for new chapters, I'm dying inside. I don't know why I enjoy making Zoro a therapist, but so yeah. I will be writing each story I've mentioned, but it's just a matter of order of publishing really. I can't start them all at once or else all the plot points will get confused in my head and yeah, I'd cry of over-writing (I'm lying, I love writing too much ...)_

 _Guest #2: I hope you like **Speechless** , if you've checked it out._

 _Raigon : Actually, **this** is the end._

 _X. summergrey .X: Because Japan is mean, no they aren't engaged but if Sanji had just listened to Zoro, they could've been on their honeymoon. I prefer them in Japan though._

 _NaruHinaLuvr : I'm really, really glad you like it and consider it that good!_

 _lilcutieprincess : I hope this ending wasn't horrible._

 _fangal4life : The other two stories will be written, at some point. You'd be surprised how much angst I can get in. I like to balance things, happy chapter, depressing chapter, happy chapter, you see the pattern?_

 _ **Okay now my last question to you guys: This has been a seriously wild ride. I want to know any last thoughts you have about this. Have you enjoyed the journey? Am I being ridiculous, starting another story for this archive without even being in the 200s of the show? What was your favorite part? Was it worth your while or do you feel like you just wasted hours of your life? Please let me know! If you leave your username, I will PM you (if you have PM on) and give you my reply to your review.** _

_And now to edit._

 _Oh Dear God, why did I write so much?!_


	43. Thank You Updating Schedule Inc

_So hello everyone! It's the author here, Setkia. I just wanted to thank you all, properly because the thing is, **Beautiful Disaster** was my first **One Piece** story and thus, it means a lot to me and even though I paid a heck of a lot of attention to the reviewers, I don't think I paid enough attention to those who followed and favorited, while remaining silent, so this is for you guys. It's not a new chapter, sorry. I am currently on Haitus from **One Piece,** but **I will be back in December,** putting my focus really in if my heart was a house, just because it's a HUGE project. My other updates will be pretty haphazard, and I'm sorry about that but I am busy and I do have too many stories that are unfinished and I know I should prioritize all the old stories but if my heart was a house is a story that will take at least a year to write, so I'd best get started on it._

Now the thank yous for (note, if I alter your name it's cause it won't show up otherwise):

Favoriting:

1228149400

Aj the human

Analaa

Andety

Andromeda Uchiha 11 (cause otherwise it won't show your name)

Animedemon01

AoiStrawberry

Archarty

AruRmz

Asupergirl09

Ayamichan34

Azurai Wolf

BeASlumberingDragon

Blue solider 4710

Bridi124

CandyPrince3408

CaptainNapkin

CiCi125

CobraViperPython

Cocoa Mothership

Cottonpaw

CrystalBalle

DaYaNa1997

Daisuke Kazamatsuri

DarkerThanBlack1209

Dragon6125

DreamTeam679

Dreary Angel

ECJBlover

EmoViolet18

EstelleR

Fallen Seraphina

Firevein

FlNCH-FACE

Freedeal

Glaistig

GothicNinjaKitty

HadenXCharm

HollyWoodFix

I'mSecretlyANinjaTimeLord

INCUBUS3

Immortalanarchy

Iya of Dry Wells

Jeminaks

Jenna Kirkland

JustCallMeLucie

Kakashi's Library

Kathi1225

Kirbystar25

Kisa101

KleinXDgirl

Kouhai Raven-ya

Labyrinth-chan

Leirative

Lightning-Kinkaku

Lilac Demetrius

Lillypad63

Lithium012

Lokiko

Luna1693

Magic126

MakaChii

Maritere125

Marshmallow Pirate

MelodyJJones

MissGame

Moony the Mature One

Mrs. Chazz Princeton

MrsKWhitlock

MsKnowAllAboutYaoi

MysticWaterWolf

Naghi-tan

Nara Kimidare

NaruHinaLuvr13

NazaRamirez

NightShade Arscelin

Nihilius

Nike Scarlet

Nilzkin00

Ninjdragon

Nocternal18

Noom-Moonlight Wolf

NotSoBlueaBear

Nut Ellai

OceanoDiCeleste

Oktoberskies101

OutsidersWhiteTiger

Pajamaz

Panda Blackwhite

PandoraGenesis

PassiveFish

Peach276

Pen-Woman

Pii

Pinapples

Princess-Captain-America

PrincessTheRipper01

Pyronigma

Quinze

ResRei

RidiculousJabbi

Ringochan94

RyuuTsukiko

Sadleh

Scarletfire16

Sekai Roronoa

Sexyvampire13

ShitCook

Shizuka Taiyou

Skywillow

SomniareSolus

Son Kumkio

StandUpEvenIfYouStandAlone

Starwand

Storm08

Subaru's dreams

SunnyDe

Sweetlilacdreams

Tamul-chan9090

TheHoshiLiveOnMoon

ThePoliceLlama

ThePorcelainPrincess3

TheWorstCaseScenario

Topkapi

Tulula-Mate

UEAcon

Usagimisaki123

VampireKoiBite

VeryFineAutumn4869

X summergrey X

XxNEGATIVE0xX

Yaoilover5000

YoruSora1

Yuzurie

Zrsj

aToriStory

adorkableseyton

alts92

animelovertillend

arburns0611

arisa4

aurorajackson

babygirl2224

bakayaro onna

blossomerry

blueangel205

blueexorcistfansince2012

book reader-lover of 3000

bronze andromeda shun

bronzecladsamurai

bubble sheai m

clementyneoh9

cptbludz13

crystalbluefox

dominygringa

dyingmockingbird

ecklumi

eyes0nme19

fanfiction lover 228

freak9quanquan

funkipunkies

gmcanalq

grimmichi666

grimmjowislife

hiruma-devil

jynxxchan

k-chii

kikifry

kurosusayuri

lSnowBlack

leon-andrew

leoqueen27

lissahx

lunafly123

lupcy

mehungee

minichampi

mizz-jollyrancher

moonrise heart

murdockxface

nachtwolke

nekonesan

ninjalena

oneshothanson

oohinata

oswaldstreet

razephyr

rlk19952

savannahs1

thelonliestpineapple

tomari

versora

xX Zeode Xx

xxsoniaxx

zabani-chan

Before we get to the ones who followed, I just want to do specific shout-outs to the following people: ** _GothicNinjaKitty, fanfiction lover 228 and oneshothanson,_ ** because you guys were the FIRST people to favorite this story and it really means a lot to me, that you all liked it.

Next, the thanks for the follows!

07 NIGHT 

AirieDLokie 

Aj the human 

Andety 

Andromeda Uchiha 11 

Aniko88 

Asupergirl09 

BeASlumberingDragon 

BubbleToMyTea 

CandyPrince3408 

CaptainNapkin 

CobraViperPython 

Cottonpaw 

CrystalBalle 

DreamTeam679 

Dreary Angel 

Dyloa 

Elliona1 

Firevein 

FlNCH-FACE 

GothicNinjaKitty 

GreenWolf82 

HadenXCharm 

Half-A-Soul-Ginger 

I'mSecretlyANinjaTimeLord 

Ikaros Light 

Iya of Dry Wells 

JJbad 

Jade The Angel 

Jehane Spencer 

Kakashi's Library 

Kathi1225 

Kaynahugs 

Keitsu Han'ei 

Kirbystar25 

Labyrinth-chan 

Lawlipops 

Lightning-Kinkaku 

Lil Saiyan 

Lillypad63 

Lue Meldane 

Luna1693 

Magic126 

Michi-chi 

Michikuni Mayu 

Mrs. Chazz Princeton 

MrsKWhitlock 

MsKnowAllAboutYaoi 

MysticWaterWolf 

Naghi-tan 

NaruHinaLuvr13 

NazaRamirez 

Night Sapphire 

NightShade Arscelin 

Nike Scarlet 

NinaRose475

Ninjdragon 

Nocternal18 

Non-Original Name 

NotSoBlueaBear 

Ohtare Siriel 

OtterFalcon 

PassiveFish 

Pen-Woman

PiWrite 

Picu 

Pyronigma 

Ringochan94 

RockThatBeat 

RyuuTsukiko 

Sadekuuro 

Sadleh 

Shizuka Taiyou 

Silver-Dragon02 

SomniareSolus 

Son Kumkio 

Spad3z 

Starwand 

Stray Moss 

Sugar-coffee 

SunnyDe 

Sweetlilacdreams 

TKS-bishies 

Tamul-chan9090 

TeamAlphaQ 

ThePorcelainPrincess3 

Topkapi

Tulula-Mate 

Usagimisaki123 

VampireKoiBite 

XxNEGATIVE0xX 

Yuzurie 

a1wonder50 

aToriStory 

animelovertillend 

arburns0611 

arisa4 

aurorage 

aurorajackson 

bakayaro onna 

bakeum44

bed of nails and sandpaper 

blue521 

blueexorcistfansince2012 

book reader-lover of 3000 

bronze andromeda shun 

cersedshadow 

crystalbluefox 

devillish neko 

dominygringa 

dragonwriter88 

ecklumi 

fangal4life 

funkipunkies

k-chii 

kikifry 

lSnowBlack 

leoqueen27 

lilcutieprincess 

lissahx 

lunafly123 

minichampi 

moonsmile931

nachtwolke 

nek0mi 

nekonesan 

nero922 

ninjalena 

razephyr 

rlk19952 

roaer 

savannahs1 

slo19969 

springstein 

theLoveablelyLovelyNinja 

versora 

xX Zeode Xx

Again, shout-outs to: _**AirieDLokie, Elliona1, GothicNinjaKitty, Lil Saiyan, a1wonder50, and bakeum44,**_ all people who followed before this was even something to be proud of.

 _I'm on Tumblr, for those who want to reach me, it's the same username and if you're a fan of **Haikyūu!** I'm on AO3, if you want to check out those stories. I really do like hearing from you, how I can improve and such and are you are all really special to me as my first readers of my **One Piece** stories._

 _Delving into a new fandom is hard, and there's so much judgement and such that I was terrified of but I've only gotten a few hateful comments and I'm really glad about that, plus I was so clueless about One Piece, writing Ace's character before I had even met him. I hope you continue to read my stories and enjoy!_

 _If you don't have Tumblr, or AO3 or anything, you can reach me at my e-mail, **setkia dot writer at gmail dot com I love hearing from you guys!**_

 _Thank you once again so much, your support really does mean everything to me!_

 _See you in December!_

 _Also I apologize for Speechless ... It's a wreck. I hate it._


End file.
